Episode Transcription

00:00 So what would you do if you went to the dentist and your dentist had a necklace of teeth around their neck? Huh? Also a hippo in the dentist office like a live real life it both. That's right. This week we're learning about painless Parker, a traveling dentist in the eighteen hundreds, who was basically like a circus. They were on the town and he would do dentists work is like a 00:17 Hey, come one, come all, I'll pull all your teeth out. This episode was recommended to us by our member, Michael, the grandpa of Tillen. We appreciate this. The best way to get recommendations to us is by becoming a member. You can do that at tillen.com slash support. This comes out, what day is it? December 17th? Yeah, Merry Christmas. I think I'm done for the year. There's no more public, like most of the stuff I do in December is like Christmas parties and stuff. Yeah, there's a lot of stuff. So I mean, I'm not home a lot in December, but, and I, you know. 00:44 we can't hang out, but I'm sure by this point I've got shows booked for the next year, so you can always find my shows at jaronmyers.com slash shows or at paulredtheactor.com. Speaking of private shows, this isn't one of them. Tell your friends about them. We want everyone to know that this show exists, so thanks. Thanks for watching. If this is your first time, if you were googling this dentist and you've just found this episode, this is a comedy podcast, so you are going to learn the info, but we're going to joke around a lot on the way, so please don't get mad at that. 01:13 Yeah. And if you hate it, we've got 200 other episodes you can check out. So thanks for being here. 01:21 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of painless Parker painless Parker painless Parker like painless painless yeah okay like pay less, but if pay was pain pain pain less Parker, this is him to give you an idea of the era. Okay, this photo was taken three years ago. It's a it's a filter filter. It's an issue. This is back when Instagram started yeah, a painless Parker 01:49 take a guess. What do you think pain this parker does? I'm curious if you can get to this. I think he is a businessman. I think that he that's one way to put it. I guess sure. O was in the mob no oh, but I could see it. Honestly, I didn't think about that before. Parker, but there's a chance that that's is he a hit man? No, no, we're not. We're not back to back hit head episodes. Okay, and this no painless parker born eighteen seventy two in 02:19 Pianamuth Creek, New Brunswick, Canada, okay, so he's a Canadian. If that gives you any idea about him was he was an interesting guy because he as a kid was not like the most astute person in the most astute kid. I had a hard time in school kind of I wouldn't say dumb, but you know just didn't do great. He's teacher would have especially in that. I wouldn't say dumb. A lot of other people would though. Yeah, I want to say dumb 02:48 but as a teacher I would so he went to a KDA University in Nova Scotia okay where Nova Scotia okay? You got a problem with this? Why I'm saying that you do you think man he was expelled from Nova from a KDA University? Huh? You called I feel great. He's crossing your arms over there. Yeah, it's just how I talk some. Just put your sweater back on. Why don't you just shut up? Are you cold? I feel great. I've never felt better. He I just I can't 03:17 I'm distracted because I cross my arms because you're over here. I cross my arms sometimes whatever I piece it now sometimes. Why did you say that? What so what so I cross my arms I PC that was that to do with anything you could have said anything else 03:44 we don't see that video. Some I said it. That's how I said it, just like the guy in the videos that I referenced the video. I don't spend. I don't have internet. I've seen that video. What video you talk about? It's a video where a guy the exact way I said I cross my arm. Sometimes it's a video. The guy's just on like selfie cam and he's like he's like I P sitting down sometimes. So what if I P sitting down sometimes? Sometimes I like to peace sitting down and we're on different sides of tick tock 04:12 I only go on the stem channel. Why did they do that? 04:19 I only follow and it's like not even update good. It's so yeah. You just have to tag your video stuff. It's like here's how soil works and you're like oh God, give it out in weird people. I need to get back. I got to get back to the weirds. It's because it's because they're trying to block it in the US and they're trying to tell the US away. We're so no, no, no, no, there's smart stuff on. We're there. So I there's some on here. Yeah, let your kids watch 04:49 your pee when you're standing up versus when you're sitting down and how the velocity of the way that the water hits water it's better for the environment better for the environment and I'm trying to save baby seals. Yeah, that's a thing. It's a thing. So what if I cross my arm sometimes? See you're doing it? Yeah, I'm freezing and you're in a t shirt over. I was just worried about you. I've never felt better. Okay, so painless Peyton Manning 05:17 so painless by my patent, his I'm painless man, so I should say his name isn't painless. It's Edgar Edgar R. R. Parker. He so he got expelled from Acadia University and after that he's like well, maybe I can go to the Baptist Seminary in New Brunswick, so he goes there. He also gets expelled from the Baptist Seminary, and so he says well, these this isn't working for me. 05:44 and so he becomes a door to door salesman selling pots and pans and stuff. Yeah, and this is the 18 nineties. Yeah, it would be eighteen nineties about and so the silver dollar city era, if you will. Yeah, but he's in Canada, so I don't know what they're at. What do you think they were ahead of us? Well, yeah, but but some of our city was super American 18, so whatever the Canadian version of solar city would be. What do you think the eighteen nineties were like across the world? 06:11 I mean it was similar, but what I'm saying is it's not as patriotic like the like some of our city's super patriotic is he weird if you were in Canada in the eighteen nineties and they were like the American flag. Isn't it? They say hey, we hate this country and you're like what and you're like we're in Branson, Missouri. We freaking hate this place. I'll tell you what we love Nova Scotia. We love it up there and I give us Scott. No urinals in this park. We peace it down. 06:40 like true Canadians. You're like well, this part's way different than I thought. I was no one expected. Where's all the roller coasters? It's just just there's no year at all. No roller coasters, none of the roller coasters have seats though. That's interesting. Yeah, you have to stand up and all those 07:00 it's like those it's like it's it's stand while you we sit while you P. That's what they are saying. That's what we call it stand while you we like I know what you do, but then sit while you but they have bathroom attendance, so they make sure they're like like hey that's not the bathroom police. Hey, you got to sit while you do that. I see you hovering 07:28 I see you hovering over it. I was in I want to see skin to see contact. I was like I have a season pass holder and they're like we don't care. It's like it's like when I was in sixth grade and dude every time we're doing an insanely wild out there bit every time dude you're like this reminds me so much of the time when I was in 08:05 time it is for bill is just like my software. You're a high school. What are you talking about? Never go ahead, so great, so you know it reminds me a park like this. It was when when I was in sixth grade, we went to water world in Denver. Oh, you can go anywhere there. Rims and they had a ride. I think it was called the land before time, but it wasn't based on the movie, but the idea was it was like dinosaurs is land before time. 08:34 and they had a that was the sign and then they had a nail like a new sign right next to very poorly not affiliated with the movie though. It's what I had to do with the chick-fil-a rap or I had to go edit the captioning yeah not affiliated yeah exactly and they it was like you went through to do it. They knew the whole time and they were like hey put this out there. We're going to do a co-optive you know yeah, but then they were waiting for the reception and yeah yeah you know that's how politics work yeah and so 09:02 the ride, you go through the cave and that's all stormy and then the dinosaurs and then the comet hits and you come outside. That's the ride. And then the dinosaurs. The dinosaurs are dead. You come out. But you're in the cave and so you kind of, especially if you're a kid, you have this illusion that like no one's watching. And so one of my friends, we'll call him Jeff because that's his name, Jeff gets out of the raft and is like trying to swim through the ride. And the second he steps out of the raft, there's a whistle from somewhere. 09:31 and they're like back in the raft and you got here from standing up peon. Why is the same thing you're out of theme park, European sit European, standing up and you hear a whistle in the bathroom. The guy's like a you got to sit down. You got to sit down while you do that is the same thing got to make contact. It got up my I'm going to check when you're 10:00 I have a little thermometer and I go around. I check the temperature of the seeds too cold. I would rather throw up my guts in a public bathroom than sit on a warm toilet seat. I'll tell you what I sit down. I go what has touched that's not cold enough 10:20 that's why that's why we invented hello sharks. You ever sat on a one toilet seat sucks right? That's why we have a little fan like you know those ones you point yourself. You're like you know theme park. We have a fan to cool down down the toilet seat. The toilet yeah also works on the other side of your pillow and make it cool and make your pillow cold, so it's just a fan. So what you're telling me is you just make up a I nailed fan is all a cool. Thanks sharks, stay cool. 10:50 trick your brain into thinking someone else has never touched that toilet seat in public. That's our slogan. We're working on it. That's also in the slogan. That's our slogan. We're working another business. I do moving trucks. If you know, okay, so painless Parker, so he's door to door selling, selling pots and pay on pots and pans yeah, but he's having a hard time making a living. I guess yet. What did they sell back then the 11:20 these pots and pans yeah, but he's having a hard time making the living off that he doesn't really enjoy the work. Hey, sir, good morning. Are you happy with the pots and pans you got in your home? No, of course not. He's like doing the pre the door presentation. Yeah, yeah, you would go viral on the ring doorbell thing. That's what you got to hope if you're one of the story guys. You got to be really good at it and so he he's not making a livable wage, so he goes and he's like well, maybe I can be a ship hand and so he sure 11:47 gets a job working as a ship and traveling the oceans, the oceans, realizes he hates, he hates the ocean. And so then he comes back, hates the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah. So he's like, he's like, well, the experience just wasn't good. Do oceans have borders? Yeah. There's, I mean, what? Yeah. There's every, every, every nation has their 12:14 What's the word for that their zone? There's a zone there's a wind is the Pacific Ocean become? Oh yeah, we do have a line. There is a line and it's actually really interesting. The Pacific and the what sea is that? Is it the red sea? No, there's a when the Pacific meets a specific ocean that you can see it and the water looks a different color. No, are you serious? That's not true. You don't know about this. You made that up 12:41 Okay, it is the Atlantic. It's at the point where the Atlantic and the Pacific meet. Look at this. This is going to blow your mind. I can't believe you haven't heard of this. It's wild. Okay, show me. This is this is I cannot believe you didn't know about this. They don't mix. That's what's crazy is the water won't mix between the Atlantic and the Pacific, so there's a very clear border. No, that's the same color. Oh my God, you know about this. You're gaslighting me right now. You knew about this from the start. Never seen this. 13:10 Look, this is AI, dude. Oh, it's real from the boats. That's crazy. Yeah, that's real. Which one's the Pacific? I think it's the brighter one. I think the Atlantic is the dirty. I've been on some cruises. I know which one it is. I think the Atlantic is the dirty big old blue one is the Atlantic looks like the Gulf where I spend my days slinging jokes. You know I'm saying all right anyways, so paying this worked on the ship. Yeah, 13:38 didn't love that came back, got a job working in a warehouse and got hired for a job. The guy told him that he was going to pay him. I think it was 10 cents a week, which obviously it's a different time, right? But to put that in reference, if adjusted for inflation, that'd be $55 a week. So my great at all terrible. And so the story goes that he was carrying, I think it was the I think it was a warehouse. 14:06 and the warehouse like had like light bulbs or something or something glass. I don't remember exactly was something glass and he the guy told him he said yeah we're going to pay you ten cents a week and edgar when upon hearing this dropped the glass whatever it was and it shattered and he walked out and that was the last day he saw those guys he's like yeah i'm not yeah get out of ten oh ten cents wow don't do favors and so plus benefits 14:35 and so after that he was like well. He said all these jobs I'm trying to do are you can't make good money doing any of them, and so he said you know what I'll do what I heard you can make a lot of money doing. You know what I'll do medicine, and so he goes to New York College of Dentistry thinking. I don't know. I haven't been able to get through any school before. Let me do that. So he applies for the school and he's working there at the school or he's doing school, but obviously still needs to 15:04 How is he pay survive? Yeah, so needs to survive, so he's while he's doing school. He's like about six weeks in he's like. I think I know enough. I get this point yeah, stop it, so he starts going door to door in New York and he's like he's like hey, I'm a dentist. Did you t there let me look at them teeth? Yeah, he's like your teeth are I can pull them and so he's going door to door yanking people's and people are like yeah. Actually, my tooth does hurt 15:34 he's just like hey, you open the door already. Why are we just tying a string around that when you shut it? No, it would come in with a little forceps and stuff and because we will be like yeah lean lean your chair up against the counter as on dude and all your to think of that. That's like that's in the relative time. That's not a long time ago. No yeah, not at all, not at all. This is where we were as a people 16:02 Well, I think I open this up for that. We all think that was crazy. What are you talking about? That was 16:15 That was so normal what I did. I did not do anything weird. No, I did not do anything weird. Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! 16:29 in the early days of this show, we did like affiliate ads where we were like a sign up for grammarly and use code till and and we got like fifteen cents and now we just do patreon. It's a much better way. It's better for us as creators. It's better for you as listeners and it's a much more fun way for us to interact. We do monthly hangouts like on zoom. We just hang out and play games online and and get to know each other. It's a really fun time. So 16:56 but still use our code till in at grammerly dot com because I think it's still. I might get like a couple cents from that, but join us on patreon because we're having a great time. If you don't, we're going to have to start doing mobile game ads. 17:13 so okay. I'm saying like that wasn't that long ago. That was like relatively. You know it was a hundred and thirty years ago, but yeah, but I mean here's a thing. It wasn't like this was accepted behavior because the college found out about the college found out about this. What the heck man yeah, the college found out and they were like you're expelled so that he got kicked out of school immediately because they were like yeah. You can't do that. He's again but I pulled a couple teeth before now I got the now. I understand it. 17:43 Yeah, he's like I get it. I now I understand it and so he's like fine. He's like if you guys won't take me, I'll go to the Philadelphia Dento College. Yeah, work doesn't travel. Yeah, he goes to Philadelphia and they're like and they're in the screening and they're like. Have you ever been expelled from a school for trying to pull teeth going door to door and he's like he's like that's an oddly specific question. I did not do anything weird. Did not do anything. We're as a terasy. That's a perfectly normal thing to do. I did not do anything. We're like okay, you're accepted. 18:11 And so he goes, he plays by the rules, And so then he goes back to New Brunswick, And he sits there, he rents a space and he sits there for six weeks considered unethical to advertise dental services 18:41 and so nobody ever did it and so why unethical yeah. I mean I think I I don't know, but I'm going to be honest. It sounds probably fair. I mean you like I think like you should be able to put your name out there, but to like advertise for it. Oh, sure, sure, sure, and they did used to be in the barber shops. Yeah, they were just the back of the barber shop, the back room in the barber shop, but he had six weeks with no with no 19:10 You got a bad tooth, we got a guy in the back crazy hundred and thirty years ago. That's not that long ago. That's crazy. That's true and so he didn't get a single patient. Now you're the dentist and they go hey, by the way, you have eight cavities. You don't. You need to get a second opinion on the number of cavities that a dentist tells you you have because that's how they're ran. They know you don't know how to prove that. Yeah, that's true. They're scamming you. Yeah, yeah. If you go to the dentist and every time you go, you have cavities 19:39 you don't have cavities. You have a bad dentist yeah or either that or you're eating way too much candy. That's also possible. I guess, but you can verify that by going to another dentist. Yeah, that's a new teeth. You're like whoa yeah yeah. 19:59 I'll pull them for. Can I please pull your teeth meeting someone and say can I please? I was going to meet you, got you handcuffed, I'm going to pull your teeth, got you under contract under arrest and now under anesthesia. Huh? Hey, I mean you I'm gonna pull your teeth and that's an insane thing. What 20:29 you know, there's a room back there. You don't want those your mouth anymore than I want them in your mouth. Do you yeah it's got what you think about is kind of annoying that they're there right? Like you feel it, I'm you hate them to right right now. You hate them to hit him too right. I can tell you ate him so he's been rid of those for you. He's been six weeks with no patience sure one one evening he's talking to his landlord. I don't know. I guess people were friends with them back then and so he's like he's like yeah man. I just I can't get any patience to come back to my 20:58 my dental office. I don't know what to do and he's like. I know it's not ethical, but he's like I'm considering considering getting into advertising. He's like. I think that putting a sign out yeah, maybe things might go better if I advertise and his landlord is like well, as luck would have it, one of my friends by the name of William B, he used to work for P T Barnum and he knows a lot about advertises names was super stupid back. 21:28 You know, really a BB, shut up, dude. Oh, you know, as luck would have it, William BB, Bill BB, yeah, Bill BB, Bill BB, or you know, Bill BB, Bill BB, your little bill BB, BB. So what if I BB sitting down sometimes 21:54 I'm a cow. That reminds me of when I was in the sixth grade. 22:02 so he so his landlord connects him with William B, B sure who just recently retired from working with P T Barnum the circus guy. We have an episode about P T. We do yeah. You can go back and check that out. He's standing up 22:20 he he meets him and they get to talking and he says hey, like check this out. I know a lot about circuses, you know, and so he says what if we take this on the road and so they put together a dentist circus and they they rent a wagon. They get a band together and what they do is they started going from town to town across Canada. They roll in with the ran a wagon. They'd hit the city center 22:49 and the band would come out. The band would start playing attract a crowd and then Edgar would walk out and he would say it's me painless Parker and he would talk like a like a circus like folks. It's me painless Parker gather one gather all and then he would do his like a speech on you got bad teeth. I can see him from here. Well, what he would do is he do a speech on dental health 23:14 he'd be like he'd be like make sure you brush your teeth every day and you floss yeah stay away from sticky foods and treats and then he says he says this is how you're going to protect yourself going forward and he says also if there's anyone in the crowd today that has a sore tooth, I can pull it for you right here right now and if my name isn't painless, it's not going to hurt and so he would like pull their teeth in the back of the wagon. Would it hurt 23:37 oh it would hurt really bad, but what they did is they had the band plays. You couldn't hear him screaming and so yeah also 23:52 Oh yeah, we're going on tour next month. We just secured it. We just secured a huge tour man. It's gonna be a while we're hitting all fifty states. It's gonna be crazy to you know really a hours an opening act, you know, and then we play kind of during the middle of the show. So really who you open him for a band called painless Parker, dude. I think you know 24:12 Lincoln Parker Lincoln Park, Painless Parker, I don't know. They do the songs from the Transformers movies. You know the movies with the wagons turn into road like the wagons turn into robot. I don't really know what that is. I don't know what a movie I don't get. It's not for me dude. I don't watch movies man. I only I just make you know my my art. I just make my moonshine 24:43 I just make my moonshine and I P standing up and that's the that's the gig life for me man. It was you think we're ever going to stop smoking or like in a band bro. This is what we do. Rats might be the next cigarettes. I got my cigarettes might be the next big thing getting into you. You right. You tried this yeah. You heard about cocaine, so he is traveling town to town doing this thing. It's just so crazy to be on tour with a dentist. That's insane. It is pretty insane. 25:12 thirty three minutes by the way, close, but no cigar okay, and so he okay and so like already told me we're not going. You already said that you had to bring it up in the episode close to the cigar, and so people are screaming and the band can't play loud enough and so so they start giving so start giving people whiskey, so they're like okay, hey before you sit down, take a shot. 25:42 and the next week. This is the best dentist ever. I love this place. This is a great. That's why the barber serves beer dude. You know that Barbara's so anyway, we got to get your drug real quick. I don't even know me. I feel great right now and the whiskey wasn't working very good and so he ends up in one of the off seasons partnering with a local pharmacist to develop 26:11 his like a painkiller. Yeah, his pain powder, I think is what he called it. Okay, and so he would sprinkle that in. Oh, did he make ibuprofen? Yeah, he was sprinkled out in their mouth whenever to, you know, pull. I got like a cold sore on it on the inside of my lip and I got some of that stuff to put on it and then I the first time I did, I took too much and so my it got all over my tongue and so my tongue was just tingly for thirty minutes. I hated it. Yeah, that sucks. 26:39 yeah, so it's very similar concept. It would numb the it was like a way you just responded to me is the same way I respond when you go on your UAP rants where you're just freaking like oh my gosh man, do you think there's a lans the bottom of the ocean? The sharks are all in on it and the sharks all know each other and they're like oh look at those aliens down there and then I go man. My tongue was numb last night and you're like okay, I think 27:09 so what he was given them, he was giving them cocaine. He was giving everybody cocaine now. I was making a joke. I was making a joke about that. Yeah, that was the times, but yeah, he was giving everyone cocaine yeah, and that was how he was making them. He figure that out. Did someone just give him the pharmacist? Okay, the cocaine wasn't everything. Everybody was like cocaine's this magic thing you can put in anything and it makes everything better. If you use a little bit of cocaine and so that's what they were doing 27:37 Oh, a spoon full of cocaine, go down exactly. That was the original song. They had to change it for the end. They did. That's true and they photoshopped out his cigarettes, so they would. So they would jump in the town. The band would start playing. They would give his speech and then pull people aside and then he'd give him a little bit sneak him some cocaine, pull the teeth and then they become addicts for the rest of their life and this was his show. 28:05 He would tour around doing the show. I love that. And I love that guy. That dentist was crazy. The best dentist I've ever seen. I love that guy. And so he started to become almost like a household name, traveled this traveling dentist circus thing. And people would wait for him to come to town to see, went for their dental needs. They're like, oh, Painless Parker's going to be here soon. And he continually upped the ante on his circus 28:35 And so like he would have tightrope walkers. He had people that did the ring things. He got an elephant and he would ride in his town on the elephant. I was literally about to make a joke. He had a hippopotamus and he would start, he started opening the hippo's mouth and putting it around his mouth while he did the extractions from people. And so he'd be pulling people's teeth with his head inside a hippo mouth. 29:06 I'm just trying to think like why I mean it's a circus from this era. It's a circus okay, and so and he would when he showed up. It was kind of like this marathon of he's like he's like you need your teeth pulled you need your teeth pulled and he just pulled people's teeth and they were they were paying for this. Yeah, so it was fifty srein can hand or a fist. It was fifty cents per extraction and if they said it hurt he would 29:30 give them five dollars if he said it hurt. It never hurt because they were high. They were high on cocaine. Yeah. And so even if they said it, he would just gaslight them. How many would he do a day, do you know? Well, he did a lot. He would do a lot. His record, he said, was 357. And he, you're going to love this, he hung onto those and he made a little necklace that he started wearing to all of his shows. Ah! Shit, they were fine. 30:01 off. Here's a here's a close up of that necklace allegedly from that one day. I don't know. I don't maybe, maybe, maybe, but yeah, there he is. He would wear the top hat and the necklace sanders with a with a tooth necklace. It looks like those smarty necklaces you used to get as a kid. Human teeth 30:23 Oh, I hate that and so they tore for a while him and his friend William. Yeah, there's out there rip the road dog and oh my gosh, I hate sorry that maybe feel 30:38 Thanks for checking out this episode. In that mailing list, we give updates on past episodes. and every week things are changing. So if you want to keep learning stuff, in the Tillon verse. 31:04 I like that. I've never said Till and Verse before, but I'm Till and Verse, that's the best place to do it. You can go to text tilland to 66866. There's a lot of ways to sign up for going on in the Till and Verse. 31:30 And after a few years of this, William is like, Nope. And so they start opening up stores. and they would put all this advertising on it. 31:59 and painless dentistry, yes me painless Parker, and so his thing was he was he was the painless dentist. New York's wonderful wizard of painless dentistry. Yeah and so he would he was the only dentist that would give you cocaine and so he was known for it and so they got they got an actual brick and mortar location with quite a bit of coke. Then yeah, 32:26 actually yeah a lot. A lot of you know he was using it recreationally, maybe probably yeah brick and mortar. They got a brick and mortar and they covered it with all these pay Parker signs in New York City and they actually started branching out and within just a few years they had seventeen locations across the states. Here's his San Francisco location and they all had this become cbs, doesn't it it might actually yeah. That might be a cbs now 32:55 and so he seventeen offices and now he's got all these other dentists underneath them that are working in there giving people coke, pulling their teeth, putting their heads in hippos. They're like, why is there a hippo in this dentist office? He's like, oh, you want to see some cool here? Love this. You're going to love this and he's still touring and so by the I ran out of masks to keep me you know, spit from off and I got to use this hippo. Yeah, yeah and so oh sorry I misspoke. He had 33:24 twenty eight offices and was employing over seventy five dentists and he was grossing three million dollars a year in nineteen. This is like nineteen thirteen and so adjusted for inflation. That's ninety six million dollars a year doing this weird dentistry and so crazy. Obviously, some other dentists start to have some problem with this because he's 33:52 taking a lot of business from them. And also like it's unethical in the industry to advertise for yourself. And he's very, very advertising. And they're also sketched out about the painless thing. And so this- They start going undercover. Well, this commission comes together and they put together this commission to basically pass a law. It starts in California, ends up passing nationwide later. But in California, where if you're a dentist, your office has to be named after your legal name. 34:22 he can't have his office called painless parker anymore because his name is ed Edgar Parker, so he legally changed his first name to painless on dude. That's what I'm talking about. He's like he's like I'm married to the game 34:44 but oh yeah, Edgar is my maiden name. Now it's painless because I'm married to the game. That's crazy, so yeah, so I respect that so much. I mean here's the thing he's making ninety eight million a year. Of course you're changing your name to painless in that scenario like of course yeah, of course you are Chad Ocho Cinco right there dude, so painless 35:15 is having a great career, he's doing the road dog thing, right, and William Beebe and him are like buds. And then one day on the road. Yeah, Beebe's getting rich off of them. And then one day. One day on the road. Beebe mysteriously dies. Beebe suffers a stroke and dies. That's what I'm saying, too much cocaine. Honestly, probably. And this was really, really hard for Painless. Painless, he actually, 35:44 I hate now that I'm just calling him painless. Yeah, but he was painless. Now he on Parker. I like painless. Okay, and so painless painless is very affected by this and he actually gets institutionalized for a little bit because it was such a major flaw on him. And after that he comes out and he kind of he's kind of changed like he's still into the dentistry thing, but he's not 36:14 as passionate about it. He stops doing the road shows. He sells off a lot of his locations to the dentists that were operating it and after a few years he all but retires from dentistry and I mean at this point he's made enough to survive off for years, but eventually the call you can't you can't deny the call and so he gets back in neither call, so he gets back into the game continues every time I think about quit and stand up. 36:44 Yeah, you know, I'm not going to rob the world of this gift that God gave them. Yeah, you're right that God gave them so I have no choice. I am but a vessel. That's why my legal name is Jaren Myers comedy. Okay, my legal name is at Jaren Meyers. 37:10 You add the at to your first name. That's insane. 37:18 so he gets into it. He gets back into it, opens up it or it still has one of his remaining shots continues to work out of there. The San Francisco Lo take location moves into the apartment upstairs gets married, has a son, names his son painless jr. That's true and then a couple other kids that he didn't name and then he was just like Maria. Yeah, he cares 37:43 who cares you're at the first no sorry that was it was painless. It was Maria and then who cares that was okay. I see it yeah because his wife was kind of dumb. She said what I want to name this one. Who cares she's like I don't hate that I like that works. All right, you 38:08 It's kind of dumb and so then he he put together all these dental care products. He started selling the powders, the toothpaste, all this different stuff, right mouthwash and made good money off of all that and ended up working until he died as a dentist and hold on. Let's see nineteen fifty two at the age of eighty 38:34 And his products were still all over all sorts of stuff. But the second he died, a commission came together and outlaw a lot of the products he sold. And I mean, a lot of it kind of was, but he didn't. 39:00 He wasn't like a professional. Everybody kind of acted. They called him a showman, not a dentist. Okay. And I don't know. I think it's an interesting thing. And if you read like dental journals, they have this weird love hate relationship with them because they do a credit him as being someone who really made dental health mainstream because he was such a good advertiser. I'm a dental health advocate. How's your dental health right now? 39:28 exactly and so they were like they're like they think that because of what he did like that's dental teeth brushing and stuff like that wouldn't have become such a big deal like he was a person teeth brushing yeah stuff like that teeth brushing mouth washing teeth brushing all this stuff that we do to care for our teeth yeah probably wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for him. He was the pioneer of that. I mean eventually would have I mean dentures existed, but maybe I don't know 39:56 He was a pioneer in making all that something that the general public wanted to do. Well, you know what the myth about George Washington's dentures was. Oh, that they were wooden teeth. Yeah, but they were really... Yeah, they were something worse, something way worse. We'll let you Google it later. You can Google that. And so the dental journals nowadays are like, yeah, we can appreciate him for what he did for the industry. Yeah. But they... 40:26 are they don't like him because he wasn't very professional about it. I guess sure, you know, sure, sure, and so there's a weird relationship with them. His college, though, has a has a like, I don't know what you call it named after him. It's it's not a hall, but they have like a display in like their historical dental museum that they have there. Okay, and Philadelphia dentistry school. Yeah, they've changed their name to the dental university school of dentistry. The ten cents, sorry temple 40:54 temple University School of Dentistry, okay, temple University School of Dentistry. They have a history of dental museum and in that museum he has a display dedicated to him and that display has his teeth, necklace and it also has a wooden bucket full of teeth that he pulled himself because he kept them all. I guess and I guess when that's psychotic when he was traveling, he would keep those those teeth at the 41:20 in the bucket and so there'd be a bucking like we got all in here. Look at all the teeth I got yeah. Look, I've done this hundreds of times yeah yeah you can. You can count how many teeth I've pulled none of these. That's actually one of the carnival games. I guess how many guess how many teeth are in every teeth right here and so they're like they're like yeah he promoted it. He made it a big deal, but like we don't like the way he did it. It was kind of weird the way he did it and we don't really support that, but like yeah good on him for making it a big deal and so they out a lot of stuff coincidentally. 41:48 The person who led that charge in like banning all this stuff and taking the name off of all those office was a guy by the name of painless Parker Jr. Because he hated his dad. He was so mad. He was also a dentist. He grew up. He became a dentist, but he was a serious dentist. Like he took it seriously and he was like my dad kind of suck. He resented him for naming him painless. And so the second he died, he like 42:18 got back at him and took his name all and he changed his name and he changed his crest. He changed his name to Edgar. That's true. He did really change his name to Edgar. He changed his name to Edgar, but waited for his dad to die, so that tells me his dad beat him with that tooth. Nicholas. Oh yeah, I can't like I can't change my name until he's dead. Well, think about that though. Your dad has a bucket of human bro, 42:44 You're not going to be like maybe I should stand up to this guy and I guarantee at home this coked out crazy eighty year old with a bucket of teeth. I guarantee that when when painless junior was thirteen painless senior sat him down one day and said hey my name might be painless, but it's not painless to you. I guarantee that happened. This hurts you more than it hurts me. You know why, because I'm on cocaine 43:10 I don't feel a thing. I haven't felt anything since 1893. 43:17 so I want to see contact 43:22 Yeah, so that's that's painless Parker, the crazy crazy that's Colonel Sanders of teeth. Yeah, he also looks like Kellogg. He looks like Kellogg. Yeah, yeah, which it might have been kind of the thing at that in that era like doc look like that like that. Yeah, yeah, I just can't believe the tooth necklace. That's crazy. Yeah, so next time you go to the dentist, I mean bring it up, maybe just go to the circus, ask him be like hey 43:51 you guys got to be hippos got any cocaine here. I heard that was a thing. I heard that was like something that I hear that. Oh, I listen to this podcast hosted by Tim Stone and fiddle off Myers 44:13 Hey, thanks for watching this episode. If you like it, we've got another one called John R. Brinkley. He's another guy that worked in medicine, but was a little weird and had a bunch of medical boards trying to take him down. So if you like this one, make sure you check that one out. It's linked below or in some of the buttons, you can click all over the screen. If you like this show and you want to support, the best way to do it is by becoming a member. You can do that at tilland.com slash support. Our members make this show possible. They also get tons of great perks, like this episode, ad free early access. They get access to a Discord with our hosts and our producers and a lot of other, 44:43 awesome perks. So that helps to support the show. And also you get some stuff out of it. So it's a great deal. This show is a proud member of the Evergreen Podcast Network. You can check out all of their shows and more about the network at ever Thanks for watching our show. We really love that you're here enjoying this with us. We'll see you next week on Things I Learned Last Night.