Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of Teo Albrecht? Pretty sure it's pronounced Theo. I thought it was Theo, but I don't know no Theo, Teo Teo Teo Teo. I think it's Teo Albrecht, Teo Albrecht. He is a German. He was born in 1922, March 1922, okay, him and his brother, uh his brother. His name is Carl. Let me see. I don't know when Carl was born. I don't know if they're twins or if they're just brothers. 00:29 No, he's the older brother. He's born in 1920, which makes some sense. Actually, now that I think about it, that makes sense thing by the story. Yeah, that does make a little bit. I agree. Yeah, you know what I did yesterday. No, you don't get to roll in, start this late of our recording and then be like, you know what I did yesterday? I don't. I want know what you did this morning because it's now it is the afternoon we were supposed to start recording. We were supposed to start recording an hour ago. We were not supposed to start 00:59 hour ago. Okay, me and Alex disagree. So what did you do yesterday? Oh yeah, last night, Bri and I, watched, we watched family feud on just 01:15 This is not worth it already. I no, is not is me and my wife. We watched family feud. You know we own a home or a couple. We have a kid now. We we watch the family feud. The best thing about family feud is that right after family feuds over it's finding big foot is on. I know the programming it's family feud. Steve Harvey. Yeah, that's the best one horses. Steve Harvey. No. So we watched fairly feud just on like 01:44 we don't even have cable anymore. So it was literally like we have the bunny ears and so we just like over the air family feud from basic tv like air. Okay and it's been ages honestly probably five years at the minimum that i've watched tv just like actual tv not like a streaming platform sure and there was something about it and i don't know if this is nostalgia or if this is genuinely different but it was more relaxing to just turn it on and be like this is what's on 02:14 and then they'll just like sit there and then they ended it and be like what's next and then it's like oh more of this and then it just kept doing that like I don't know. Do you think that the soldier do think there's something to that of like I didn't have to go find what I was going to watch? I just turned it on and it was there. That's interesting. I think that's why the for you page is successful. Yeah, 02:36 Huh, that is interesting. was, I felt much more relaxed at end of the night. I also noticed that. 02:43 So I like the nostalgia that you're reaching for is still TV. You know, I'm saying like it's not like, man, we used to just sit by a babbling brook and listening to the calming waters to go and you're like, yeah, I actually really like that. It's like, you know, that commercial for what's that service where you can send your poop off and it comes back and like, you don't have colon cancer. You're good. What's that service called? That's so nostalgic. What's that service called? I don't know. I thought you'd know. I thought you'd just watch it. 03:13 email. Sure, colon flicks. I don't know, but also I noticed what's really interesting about this show to feel like the Internet broke it because family feud. Yeah, it's very evident and I think we've talked about this before, but it's very evident that so much of the questions that they asked are just trying to get clips for social because it's like, this is going to elicit like funny answers that people are going to say usually for on she and not family friendly. 03:42 answers in family feud. uh Okay, but I've just been thinking about and I and I think that Steve Harvey though. I don't know if that's I don't think it is because I remember is Steve the writer well, I so I dated a girl in two thousand twelve thousand thirteen. We were in college yeah and that's one of the things that we would do is we would go to my parents house and we were watched family feud. My parents would go to bed at nine family food started at nine, so that was like our 04:11 30 minutes of just us in the living room hanging out. That's great. uh Your parents are bed at nine. My parents still go to bed at nine, dude. That's crazy. Now my dad wakes up, works hard for his money. Yeah, I know. What time does your dad wake up? My dad wakes up at 330 in the morning. Same. And he gets grinded on some subway toasters. know? I got to bed at 1 AM. I wake up at 330 AM. And he'll see me. 04:38 complain. got a bed at one a.m. I wake up at one fifteen a.m. I'm already ahead of you. I'm a week ahead weekend by the time you wake. Yeah, you wake up. I've already lived three lifetimes three lives. No, but it's just it just feels like and I don't think it's Steve Harvey because it's it's the questions the quest. I understand what you're saying, but I'm saying I think when they decided to take a more comedic approach 05:02 I think that's yeah. I think it's a lot of the clips you see on social media are from old episodes. I don't think they're engineered. You didn't watch a new episode of family few. They still filming it. Yes, yes, they were. I don't think of that. They were these were they. I don't know if they were brand new episodes, but they were episodes that were recent enough because I could tell by like the celebrities that they had on. I was so ever do family. Oh, you left that detail out. You left that detail out 05:28 but I could tell like hey, should we try to get on family for you? Because what is it? It's like four people right four or five four or five five. It's five people. Yeah, okay. Well, there's three of us. Okay, so close. Wait a minute. What if we did? What if we did me, you, Alex, Alex has to wear a bag over his head and then you want to try to ask the ninjas guys if they would do with us. Yeah, yeah, 05:58 There's five. There's five. Hey, Andy and Josh, if you want to go on family feud, text me back. Next, I'm going to text you right now. And I'm assuming you didn't text him right now. I'm assuming you just haven't texted back Andy, but are listening to this episode. We should try to get on family together. No context, no lead in, no lead in just 06:27 Hey, just found out they're still filming family feud. We should do it. I do it, but here's the thing. Like a lot of those shows, this is such a long tangent and that's not worth it because you're talking about celebrity family feud and I'm just not going to listen to you anymore. How about that? So you're like, oh, here's something that's worth wasting time on. You took five minutes to do it. You started a time. It's I took five minutes. You got time around the wall, so I can see about emailing people or texting people. I don't know. 06:56 I just think I just here's the here's the thing I feel there's no more things. I've there's no more things. It's just weird to be here. You tried to go shut up, up, shut up, stop. Thank you. You did a thing where you were like okay, it's more relaxing. All right, that's one point that you've made about failing feud and then you were like also. I think it's in here for social media. That's a second point. You've made about family viewed. Yeah, I you're trying to draw two thesis. I'm not no 07:26 you dropped it a thesis. You dropped it a thesis. I'm tell too many thesis. I would like to move on. We're done with your thesis. I would like to move on. No, but this is the real point. This is the real point I had. This is the one I actually wanted to talk about third thesis. No, this is part of the second. Go ahead. You just haven't let me finish the second. The second thesis is not done. There was a couple of jokes that were said okay that I think 07:56 Any time pre 2010, the producers would have been like, we got to cut that. But they let it go. And I do think it's because, oh, that's going to go viral. And so now the producers see this type of stuff and they're like, oh, sweet, this is gold because they know it's going to go viral. And I just feel like and I can't believe I'm saying this because this makes me feel like such a old foggy, but 08:25 but I'm just like what happened to the core? Like what happened to like to just being like yeah, we don't want to lose her. Oh, what happened to being appropriate? You know what I love about my favorite about family feud is that is that Steve Harvey wears a suit. How about that? What happened to people dressing up in suits and ties? I just I just happened to decorum, huh? 08:53 I just feel like there was everything on social media is just so inappropriate and bad and you know what and now they've tainted family feud. That's my third thesis. Here's the problem. It's not that it's not that it's raunchy. It's not that I think it's an appropriate. It's that it's raunchy and inappropriate for the sole fact that it will do numbers on social media. It's there was a point where it was like how we can't do that. That's not okay. We can't just put that out there in the world. That was a thousand inappropriate thing to do, but now it's like 09:23 oh we can do this inappropriate thing and we can do a lot of numbers on social media. So we're going to do it anyways. What I'm saying is that they were doing it. I don't think they were. I can't, I can't repeat what was in this episode yesterday, but there's a couple of things in this episode that I'm like, I cannot believe that this was in family feud and they just ran it. Okay, 09:47 I'm not gonna argue with you. I already told you I've been a I've been a I've been part of the family for a while. That's what they call my I'm telling you I've been watching the show. We used to I mean we used to watch it every night that I hung out with that girl. I know there was times where they would let these little jokes slide through, but every question there is change a thing and you know what Tim and here's what makes me so mad dude is that it's one of those things where it's like 10:14 you refuse to not argue about something man, and it makes me feel crazy. If I say something, your brain, I told you just heard it. If I say something, your brain goes nope. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's not what happens. You're wrong about that. Let me tell you ten minutes, Tim. You spent on family view, dude. I've been trying to move on for four minutes. You have 10:44 you've just you you fine. Whatever I have got you heard it. You can talk about you listen to this later. How about you? How about you show this last ten minutes to your counselor this week and be like why am I so hostile? Ask your counselor that I can tell you why I'm so I know exactly why most say I go hey, here's a thing and you go no, that's not true. I know that I know that I'm doing it right now by saying that, but that's not true. 11:13 Tim, I know how crazy it is that right now I'm saying no to that okay, but okay buddy. I want to talk about this tail guy or whatever. We don't have to talk about family. We guys just a lack of decorum in this country, but fine. Let's talk about tail outbreak. The German guy sure all right, so this guy was born in Germany in a time. I saw a clip the other day and I just couldn't imagine. It was like wow. This is crazy. The day is all how 11:43 inappropriate stuff like this to be said on Judge Judy, because like it used to be dude. These reality shows used to be primo family friendly. You know, no above approach. Nobody said anything inappropriate. I never said that they were above approach. 12:09 Tim, I've been trying to move on man. I came into this building with a blood pressure of two ten today and and how often are you measuring your blood pressure? Let's just do the episode. Let's start over now. Okay, so this was a great after the You can access everything that we just said. Oh, you hate this in the live episode Robert. All right, that 12:32 Well, that's what I'll do. I'm gonna kidnap the founder of Aldi. Tim... Why did we do so many bits on a story that's interesting? Quit doing this to me, bro. When you start an episode with a 10-minute stupid tangent and then you go, I'm gonna kidnap the founder of Aldi... Things I learned last night. 13:03 tail a man tail outbreak tail. He's a German guy. You see how you could just straight up cut that from the hey man right. No, you cannot. This is a board conversation. I just need audio listeners to hear that I'm trying. No, you're not. I need video watchers to see 13:28 we know how to get back at this story. I don't either. That's why I say we should start over now. So they'll tell in his family in a mood today. I am in a mood today. We agreed and that it's 13:46 Okay, you don't even to hold on, my hands are long. Why are you doing this? Okay, are we just gonna? All right. 14:03 tail outbreak that his family were born in Germany. I don't know where his parents were, but his brother was in Germany with him okay and his parents owned a grocery store. 14:13 I had stories I wanted to tell today in this podcast that I now I'm like I'm a save him for later because like you just wasted. It's like a family. This podcast is us wasting time on stuff. It's not worth people's time. I was like I was going to talk about my trip to Greece, but I had to Greece for a day. No talk about it, but let me talk about Tia for a little bit and then you can spend ten minutes on my Teo. So this is crazy. 14:37 His family owned a grocery store. was a local little grocery store. This was the 20s when grocery stores were like, you can get three things and you can't pick them out yourself. The grocery store person has to pick them out for you. Is that Oh yeah. Did you not know that? No. used to be. Okay. Grocery stores used to be very highly specialized. And so your grocery stores were, this is your butcher. This is your deli. This is where you get your vegetables, is where you get your general dry goods. And you would go to each of those different stores and you'd walk in there and there'd be a counter and you would tell him what you wanted. And then the counter guy would... 15:07 walk around and grab all this stuff from behind the counter and then give you all this stuff and then check you out. Or they had like an interesting form of like credit to where like they would add it to like a tab and you'd have a tab at the grocery store and then you go pay your grocery bill once a month. And so, and you'd go to all of these different stores and do this. I don't know if this is how it went in Germany, but I know for the States. Sure, sure, sure. And so in Germany, this is 1920s, thirties, parents had this grocery store and then obviously the war happened. 15:36 and Germany was just flattened. so his, their store was severely damaged, but wasn't completely destroyed. So they got to maintain the store. They were able to like ah build it back up, open it back up and they, the war was, or I would, should say the bounce back from the war was a opportune time. 16:04 for Teo and his brother, because they took over the store, him and his brother Carl, and they realized, okay, everybody's struggling right now. Half of our country got flattened, we lost the What year is this now? This is post-World War II. Okay, so 46. Right after, yeah, So yeah, 45, 46, something like that. And so they realized. He's early 20s. Yeah, they've taken over the grocery store and they realize, oh, everybody's struggling, nobody can afford to live. 16:33 And so they said, what if we have a handful of groceries that we sell that we expect to make a profit on? But then we have butter and we sell butter at cost ah because butter is really tough to get your hands on. And so because they chose to do that, they quickly became the prominent grocery store in their town because nobody could get better. had a loss leader. 16:55 Exactly yes and they were one of the first, don't know what a loss leader is. If you're like a little you know dumb person and you're like let, let us the business professionals explain to you yeah and also because we're white men. Let me explain this to you. Exactly a loss leader is how do I even put this in the way 17:16 No, but they I don't want to say they invent. It's like the Costco chicken. I hate when people are like you're the Costco chickens, a loss leader. Shut up. You know I'm talking about they were they were one of the first people to have a loss leader in the business. Yeah, we got to get. We got to keep it moving. I want to your right. Thanks for pushing along. Yeah, we do any bits about the Costco chicken. We got to give them a man. It's dumb thing. That is a report. Keep going. So they were one of the first people to come up with having a loss leader. 17:46 I don't know if they were the I don't think so. Yeah, I mean very, very for a long long yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, 18:15 twins because Carl got his name on the door, so it was the carl albrecht store. Okay, later they change it to all brecht discount store when they opened up multiple locations. Yeah, and so they started spreading and this is all in Germany. Yeah, this is in Germany, specific to like their little district and their little province that they're in sure, but over time throughout the fifties and into the sixties, they began expanding outside of just Germany into and crossing all over 18:45 um Europe. And as they did that, um their stores, ah they had the Albrecht discount store brand bought up. um I think I think they're called Hoffman or I don't know how to how to pronounce it. They bought up a whole series of grocery stores that made them the largest grocery store chain in Europe. And then they rebranded their company to Aldi. um Oh, and so at by 19:18 By 1970, had just opened a couple stores in the US. They were all over Europe. They were the largest in Europe. They were doing two billion in revenue a year, and that's German marks. Wow. Andy text me back. What did say? He said, that's an insanely good idea. I think isn't Family Food in... 19:43 Don't they film that in Orlando or do they film that in LA? 19:50 we could tell we could reach out to the ah we could reach out to family feud and say hey we've got an idea we want to do a podcasters episode it could be us versus Rogan and his guys. I'm legitimately going to have my agent reach out to family like you're kind of joking but I'm like oh now I have an agent that can reach out to family if you'd be like hey we'd love to do this because here's the thing about those shows like 20:16 uh You know, if you remember Haley and Al from our wedding, they were on divorce court. They're not married. Never. Well, no, wait, they're married now. They are now. Sorry, they weren't married. They weren't married when they went on. My bad. They weren't married. uh And because it's just actors. They just made up a story and then they went on to divorce court. I would love if you see me and my wife on divorce court. We're fine. Yeah, it's a joke. It's a bit. 20:42 It's really funny, but where's the decorum? You and I should go on divorce. No, no. Well, is he still doing it? Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. What are you talking about? Like one those, one of those other judge shows? Yeah. Judge Steve Harvey is Steve Harvey's Steve. So can we just do a run on all of Steve Harvey's shows? The Steve Harvey tour. 21:11 All right, I'm literally flying from this to Nashville to meet with my agent this week and like we're going over back. are your goals? I'm like number one anything Steve Harvey does? I want to be on it. I want to be on all of Steve's things. Yeah, get me with Steve. Yeah, I want to be Steve's new pet peeve. Make me Steve's pet peeve. Yeah, this is twenty two minutes, buddy. Let's go 21:38 So I did the math and I'm going to be honest with you. don't know if this is why did you say that? makes me so mad. That makes me so mad. 21:52 I hate that joke you uh 22:02 No 22:05 so on the cruise the other night. It was the PG show, which is family friendly. Here's the thing about this cruise. We know what PG means. Okay, she is 22:21 tell your story. Okay, so so I'm doing the PG show. It's family friendly and the whole line. You're going to hear why I said that the thing about a twelve day Mediterranean cruise of which I only did three days. Yeah, is that people don't bring their kids on those yeah on the whole cruise. There's like there's you know fifteen hundred passengers. They had they call them junior cruisers, eighteen of them. 22:46 Oh my gosh, eighty that's your cruises on this. There was no kids on this thing yeah yeah yeah, so the PG shows were like no, no one shows up to those yeah except for the old people who were like I don't ever want to hear a cuss word or I'm going to die yeah. What happened to decorum? So carnival you have decorum and then they started letting these cussers on and uh you know so anyway, cruise ship more like cuss ship, so that's them and they suck. 23:16 you know, I threw one of them over and uh so she couldn't fight back. She's too old to fight. What's she gonna do about it? So anyway, so there were three high school girls who sat front row and they were the only people laughing at this show. When I tell you that they don't set us up for success on these cruises, they gave me the seven PM show 23:44 back on boat is 630 PM, which means everyone was in Italy. I was in Italy all day in the sun, hiking, doing all the stuff right, getting back on the boat by 630. No one's going to the seven o'clock show and they put us in the big theater, which is 1500 seats and I'm telling you less than a hundred people are at the show. So it was very rough, but three high school girls sat very front row. Yeah, and I was joking around with them doing jokes. They were laughing 24:08 and and they were laughing a little too hard at some jokes where, like then I was looking at the other audience members and I said, I said you know what forget all y'all I'm here for the high school girl and then it was one of those things where I was like ah wait a minute. 24:24 I said because I think about how hard I just laughed at my own stupid joke. This is the hardest that we all started laughing when I was like don't put that on the comment cards. Please no one say that form ago. Jaren said that he was glad the high school girls were at the show. We were crying laughing. I was it was one of those things where like there was no intended bit, but I was crying laughing on stage and it was the thing where we couldn't recover the last ten minutes. The show was us just goofing around being like that. Please don't fill out the 24:54 I love that. Could you imagine though, if you guys did fill out the comic, I would get you. Imagine though, could you imagine, if you did, that's so funny. Well, anyway, okay, I was just laughing really hard on stage at that. Yeah. And I was laughing really hard at me going, you just don't hate. Do you told that joke? But I don't know why I was so funny. Okay, so five minutes. 25:23 He didn't put up his clock in the studio so I can see how long we were recording and I think he did it to try to get me to speed up a little bit, but then he spent ten minutes on family feud, so I feel like I had to sneak in. Well, I've always had a time or story on my computer yeah, but I don't use it, so I thought if it was where I could see it, then I would use it. So I did the math. I don't know how accurate this math is yeah, no promises because they were doing two billion top line revenue in a deutch marks in nineteen seventy. 25:53 The problem is sounds made up. The problem is that's obviously not US dollars, so all your calculation calculators are US dollar, so I converted that to for from doish mark to US dollar in nineteen seventy. Not sure how accurate the source I had on that was and then I'd inflation calculated it so roughly adjusted for inflation. They were doing fifty billion in revenue wow compared to what we know, so they were there US dollars US dollars yeah, so they're doing well. 26:21 is that that's what I want you to understand. I mean, even if I just told you two billion, you're doing well, see this thing, the Larry thing yesterday, speaking of fifty billion dollars. What world do we live in? That's crazy. What okay? What are you? What do you say Larry Ellison became the richest man? Oh yes, at least for a minute. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because well, did you see the way was a crazy dude? Was it him or was it Peter that text that came out? I don't like the name Peter 26:48 to be honest, because the way you said it just first of all, it only reminds me of a homeward bound where the the dying dog is like Peter. So every time I hear that name, you just you landed the are so hard on it. Peter, where you go, is it him or Peter and it's just like uses last name teal teal yeah, did or as we call him the dark sith lord. 27:17 just freaking. Is that correct? I yeah, I think that's accurate. I don't know if I I'm not sure if it was a l or but it was musk. The this type, call him Ellen Ellen text when he was buying Twitter and was like. Hey, do want to get in on this? Did you see this text? I can't remember if it was a listen or teal. I don't remember is one of the two musk reached out to one of them. Yeah, texted them as they responded leaked and he was like he was like how much to get in on it and he was like 27:46 Oh, uh how's 50 sound? And he was like, yeah, that sounds good. And he was like, just in a text thread, just like, yeah, I throw 50 billion in that deal. That's crazy. That's crazy that you're just texting someone and be like, I put 50 up for that. 28:12 my grandma's car got hit at the storage unit and I'm not going to get it fixed because it'll be like five hundred dollars and I'm like I don't want to do that. I'm glad you brought that up because on the way in I hit the other the other side. Honestly, I kind of want to I thought here's what I did realize when I when I got there today though as I realized because they haven't repainted the lines. They repaved the whole unit, but they read I'm park further back than I was supposed to be, but like 28:39 still someone hit my car and left and the storage unit was like we can't figure out who did it. It happened in a four hour window on a specific day. We have a gate log and two security cameras. Your car is not on either of the cameras, but we do with two entryways with cameras on them like it's a very obvious and there's actually one of the intro is broken. So only one word you could watch one camera for a couple hours and very easily figure that out. She's given me a run around which feels like she did it. She did it. Yeah, for sure she did it. I think she hit my car 29:08 horse. I think the storage manager hit my car and you know what I'm fine accusing her of that all right, so so they're doing really well right is that's what I'm trying fifty four minutes Tim. I can't believe we had to cut out this twenty minute tangent. You just did that's insane fifty four minutes buddy. Tim just went on those wild rant about how he does it. He's like speaking of groceries, 29:35 Isn't it crazy that Walmart's prices change and you're like yeah dude that's how inflation works. That's how the economy happens. He goes no no no no Arizona T's been ninety nine cents the whole time. I'm trying to give you the AI recap version. Yeah he just did 20 minutes on how Steve Harvey should be the next president. 29:53 I can't believe this man. Okay, I'm so mad fifty five minutes, so there was also this guy by the name of Heinz Joe, a Kim Ollenberg, another German yeah who he he was an interesting guy a little bit about him. He say it again Hans Heinz Joe, a Kim Ollenberg, okay. uh He was an interesting guy because he was a lawyer, but you wouldn't use the word good 30:23 before lawyer when you described him uh because he was a lawyer. Okay, he was he he was not qualified to be a lawyer. He actually forged a high school diploma to get into law school, uh which is a great start, really good start. Yeah, and somehow I don't know how I did it, and I'm gonna I'm gonna bet that he didn't actually finish law school either, but I guess he did. 30:52 okay. Somehow he skated through law school, got a degree, opened up a firm, but he did not have a good reputation at the firm sure. So most of the people he worked with were criminals were the type of people that he ended up working with, because they were the only people who were willing to work with such a bad lawyer. ah He also had a little bit of a gambling problem ah and he normally he was described by friends as strangely lucky except for one day. ah 31:22 one day he lost three hundred thousand dollars gambling, which is a lot to some most to the poor, not to me, a rich and uh he he borrowed that three hundred thousand dollars from his girlfriend, which crazy crazy to make up for that, but then he was like he's like I'm gonna have to I'm gonna pay you back. 31:47 but he kind had this list of people he owed debts to at this point. his ponsies, he's giving himself and including his girlfriend. It's a trap. He also has like four girlfriends and they're also all 30 years younger than him. So he's so hold on. He's got a girlfriend 30 years younger than him who has capital. Yeah. So he's a lawyer. He's, he's trying to live the high society life, but he's, he doesn't have the money for it. And so he is, he's taking on these. Yeah. But what I'm saying is his girlfriend is 30 years younger than him and has 300,000. 32:16 Yes. Yeah. 32:20 what she in her twenty's thirties yeah she's in her twenty's so her dad's yeah, okay, um but I don't know she could have made her own money. I'm not trying to be. I mean listen, it's nineteen seventy Germany, she did doubtful. Is her dad it's possible, maybe highly doubtful, um so he calls up his friend one day. 32:47 his friend's name is Paul Cron Cron was um and I friend is probably too strong of a term. A guy he's represented in court a couple times, okay, uh who he's a convicted criminal, obviously his job or I guess I shouldn't say job crime of choice. His crime of choice was safe cracking. He had done that for a while. Yeah, he didn't make enough people used to just keep stuff in safe. Yeah, and he was the guy that we've said that so many times, like when you were used to be a rich person, people could just rob you. 33:17 Yeah, and he would. He was the guy who would go in with the group of people robbing you and he'd have the stethoscope and he'd listen and he'd people back. Are you a doctor and he'd be like something like that, call himself the doctor sick, so sick, and so he was the safe guy and so he would break into the safes and get all the stuff he had been arrested. He'd gone to jail a couple times. Sounds pretty dangerous to me, but he was now working as a mechanic. So fifty seven minutes got to keep rolling. 33:46 the timer is not a fifty seven. It's for the record. Jair is just making up these numbers. What do you why do you argue everything I say dude? 34:00 Okay, keep going. Okay, so... 34:05 Hey, thanks for watching our show. you like it, a great way to help out is by being a Patreon supporter. Doing that helps make this show possible, but it also gets a lot of perks for you. You can get every episode a week early ad free. You get access to a Discord where you can meet a lot of other people who love the show and actually hang out with Jaren and I every month on a hangout. And we're also in that Discord chat all the time, hanging, talking with people, talking about episodes and just random stuff in life. It's super fun. 34:28 We do, there's a way to get birthday messages, a free gift, merch discounts in there. So there's a lot of really great reasons to be a Patreon supporter. You get a lot of benefits out of it. And it also makes the show keep happening. So if that sounds great to you, you can go to support.tilling.com or tilling.com slash support, uh or just tilling.com and search around until you find the links and become a Patreon supporter. really appreciate you doing that. But if not, right back to the episode, right? 34:56 This guy, he... 35:04 What? Just freaking do it in the mic. If you're going to do it, just do it into the mic. do it in the mic. do in the mic. Just do your bit in the mic so people can actually hear it. I don't think people can hear that. It's too quiet. He's going to have to do all this post-processing your dumb little bit. 35:21 I'm not 35:24 Like, just go! 35:29 Can I have one of those though one of what fruit stacks you're opening up under the table right now? Show me your other hand. 35:38 What are you talking about? Okay, so this is where they in. 35:59 Okay. You put it on the seat. It's my phone. Okay. uh 36:11 him. That's my phone. I don't stop doing the phone, but I know it's there for there. Okay, an hour and two minutes. Come on buddy, do the podcast. So this guy he he got out of prison. He was being represented. He's been represented by Olin Berg a few times and 36:41 this guy, Paul Cron, he got a job as a mechanic, but he, after one of his big scores, he bought this plot of land, it was right on the lake, and he had this dream of building this dream home on this land, but he is making less than $2,000 a month. 37:02 He does slowly. You did that. I'm a joke. Okay, are you good as his dream of building this dream home on the property, but he's not. He doesn't make enough money to build a home. He doesn't make enough money to buy a home and so he's like he's like I need one. Oh, speaking of this man, sorry, this is an actual time. This is an actual danger. We my neighbor 37:32 Fred, we've talked a lot about, you know, they're our neighbors for life. we move, they move. This is a good idea. He wants us to rent a house together. Yeah. And so he, he scheduled a tour of this house that he found on Zillow. $9,500 a month is the rent, but it has a main house that has five bedrooms. And then it has like a second house in the back. It's a one bedroom little ranch style, like a mother-in-law quarters type house. And so he's found this $9,500 a month. They call them next gen suites now. 38:00 Is that what they're called? Yeah, because it's for your kids because your kids can't afford to move out anymore. Woof. Yeah, isn't that great? Sucks. which is unfortunately the future. Like we're going to have to have multi-generational homes. but this house was built by the people who... So apparently the small house was the main house and then this couple built this house for their growing family and it's this oval. The floor plan doesn't make any sense, but it's... 38:28 incredible. It was built at the six, the the sixties or fifties and so like the stairs, two sets of staircase go past each other. Oh yeah, yeah, it's like inside the house is beautiful. It's like like that mid century moderns. It for sure needs renovated. Yeah, you know, it needs some updating, but it's like the floor plan is incredible and uh and Reagan's like oh my gosh, this house is like there's no house. There's no house like this. This is a one of one. No other house looks like this kind of thing right. 38:56 the utilities. you guys wait? Did you actually go do the tour? We went and did the well. The realtor wasn't really there. The back door was wide open crazy, so we just explore the house, but it was a big house and it was pretty you know, pretty pleasant and then the realtor shows up and and this is like what are you doing here? I actually feel bad because I don't think Fred realized that my neighbor, I you know it's like we're wasting this guy's time because like we're probably not going to this yeah you know and whatever. If it was an open house sure, but he 39:25 schedule an appointment. don't know. I didn't like it anyway. So realtor shows up and then I didn't care because the realtor was like, yeah, we're actually looking for a short term 12 to 18 months because the person bought it, bought the property. He's going to tear both houses down and build a bigger mansion here. My God. As soon as you said that, Reagan went, all right. I wanted to leave because like you're going to tear down a house that has character and is beautiful and nice to put up a square mansion. Yeah, that's like a huge giant house. Yeah, that sucks. 39:53 I'm so sick of house slippers. I'm really tired because like you're going to buy a house, you're going to spend $30,000 to take any kind of character. All the stuff that's put in in the sixties, you're going to take out the tile, you're going to do all the, you're to put in crappy stuff. And then you're going to list it for $120,000 more to make a return on your investment. Then I'm have to buy this for an inflated price. 40:18 that I take out all the stuff you put on another $50,000 to undo the crap you did. That sucks. Yeah, I would love to be able to buy a home and spend my parents bought a home in the 20s. They spent the next 10 years re no longer than they spent like they spent 14 years slowly renovating that house. Yeah, would love to be able to do it. I remember very clearly in the mid 2000s am eating my fruit snacks living in my parents backyard because I'm a millennial who can't afford a home. 40:46 ah I remember very clearly in the mid 2000s, a family at our church got into house flipping. It was like right when that trend started. And I will say back then it was less of like the cheapest materials, whatever. Like it was like, we're actually trying to make something of this home. But then 2008 happened. Yeah. But they got stuck in one of the houses. Like they had to move into one of the houses that they didn't finish because 41:12 they didn't have the cash anymore. But people were buying homes that were like bad. Yeah, they were buying. And that's the difference. Yes. Is if you're, I don't have a problem. make your, if you are buying a home that needs a ton of renovation. Yeah. Sure. That's not what's happening. A of these people are buying houses that are that, you know, need need renovation for sure. Like your house. 41:38 I would, I would have to do a lot of work at that place. had to do a lot of work at that place, but like I would go, could buy it now. It's, sucks, but I would buy it and I would spend the next 10 years making it better. You know, could move someone in for like 12, dude, the bathroom doesn't even have little covers and the light switches in that house. That's actually true. Yeah. 41:59 we never bothered putting them on all the doors in the house or baby proof baby can't even walk yet. Everything baby, baby, baby, baby, know, there's no need to baby proof stuff when that baby can't go anywhere is what I'm saying. No need to have the door handles. That kid can't touch that door handle for several years. Every morning we wake up and I take my baby and I put his feet on my feet and then I duct tape his legs to my legs. 42:23 and so that way he's forced to stand up and then get used to that started normal. Didn't it that started kind of normal? It's like we're walking and he's like 42:32 and so he's getting really good at walking yeah. I throws up everywhere doesn't I throw up everywhere our fifty like our in fifteen. So anyway, so the one I'm trying to say is Paul wants his dream home. Hinds owes a lot of people a lot of money because he's a gambler. He's a generate gambler with a fake high school diploma and Hines one day is reading a book because it's the seventies. They don't have social media yet 43:01 And I don't know where he got this book, library probably. He's reading this book and he's reading this book, somebody in this, whatever this book was, I don't know what the book was, but he's reading this book. And in the book it says, Teal Albrecht has $2 billion. And he says, oh, that's what I'll do. I'm going to kidnap the founder of Aldi. 43:24 Tim. 43:26 Why did we do so many bits on a story that's interesting? Quit doing this to me, bro. When you start an episode with a 10 minute stupid tangent and then you go, I'm going to kidnap the founder of Aldi, that's crazy. Start with that. I wouldn't have told any of the credit. Cut out the bit about the cruise ships. We wouldn't have done any of stuff. 43:51 So he calls up his buddy, Paul, and says, Hey, you want to kidnap the founder of all D and he's like, yeah, that sounds cool. Dude, I'm texting Andy right now. Hey, you guys working on family for you together. Also, do you want to kidnap the founder of all D with us? Just try to gauge interest. Tilling ninjas or butterflies criminals, crime, crime. That's the thing that unites every podcast. 44:22 What is that time I start shaking hands? He just told us that it's good to me. Sorry he's for I'm more of a passive. I'm a passive investor in this business, so I don't pass so funny. Oh, you fell for the old fake hand. It's a fake hand. It's a big hand. 44:51 I'm gonna start doing that to people that's crazy. Okay, okay, so okay, so he's like all right, shut up everything about this, whatever. Okay, so he's like okay, we're gonna kidnap the founder of Aldi. Yeah, okay, yeah, so one night in November, nineteen seventy one he and Paul they get up, they get together and they said okay, here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna kidnap him and they said good call and then they got the phone and they called his wife and they said ring ring. This is 45:20 They called Teo's wife. it's Teo's wife picks up and she says hello and he says, Hey, miss Albrecht, we just want to let you know that tomorrow we're going to kidnap your husband. Do not call the police. Do not try to stop us. As long as you follow our demands, everything's going to be okay. We're going to release him in due time. And she was like, okay, you haven't done this yet. And they're like, yes, we're doing it tomorrow. And she says, okay. And then 45:48 she listened to them. She just was like I'm not going to tell anybody and so then the next day, could you imagine how mad I would be if I get kidnapped and then later it comes out that my wife was like oh yeah, they give me a heads up about that. Yeah, they told me they were going to do that. They told me they're ready that you don't want to maybe even be like hey, watch out tomorrow. You don't want to like give me a subtle clue of like hey today is going to be really weird. Hey, watch your back today. Okay, if you're leaving and your wife says watch your back today, 46:19 so yeah. So he goes to work, does his work day on the way out of work. They kidnap him. How do they kidnap him? They they just grab them. They threw him in the back of his own car as he was trying to get in his car. They threw him in the back of his own car, covered up his hands, covered up a backseat yeah, the backseat of his own car and then they drove out with his own car. Here's the thing you're way more kidnapable than I am. Look at you. Let's try it. Imagine let's hire a team to kidnap both of us and see who gets tapped. 46:47 Okay, but imagine I can't get into the back seat of a car willingly. I can't do that when I want to do it. That's true. Yeah, try to get an uber is awful. Yeah, you could get me in the back seat of a car that doesn't have a back seat. Yeah, you will be comfortable in the back of a two thousand one Ford Ranger. I love the back of a Ford Ranger. 47:16 That's the context quote. I love the back of a Ford Ranger. No, those were great. They had the sideway. We don't have to explain. They're great. They're great. The back of a Ford Ranger was great. Hands up. Don't shoot. 47:38 You're to put me in the backseat of your car officer. 47:44 uh Tim, it's been an hour and half, so 47:53 so they throw him the back of the car. They pull out in the street. They're driving across town and as they're driving across town, is he just in the back seat being like yes, like yes, tied up and everything in the back seat, but mean like out the window looking at other cars. Well, that's what I'm saying. Like I guess not because there's actually we know that they leave. They're at like a stop sign somewhere else in town. The car next one pulls up and they realize oh that's his brother Carl and they see Carl looking 48:21 and later we know carls like yeah he's like I saw that I was like oh that's my brother's car and then he saw the people in the cars. I guess somebody else has the same car as my brother and then just kept driving didn't notice didn't notice his brother tied up in the back. Maybe that's a tactic. Maybe that's why Jojo see what has her face all over her car because there's nobody else who's got that you know. I'm about some people, but it's weird that your car looks just like Jojo. what wow so they take them. They take them home. 48:49 they park him in the garage to wear his house, hide his house, yeah, okay, and so they park him in the garage and then they go inside and then they are like okay. Well, we'll deal with him in the morning. We just leave him out there in the next morning. They come out and they're they get in the car and they're like what are we going to do and they try to finger it out and he's been stuck in the car overnight. He just kind of left in there and he was like all right. I guess I'm stuck. I guess I'll stay in here. Yeah, I'll stay in my own car. Yeah exactly and they overnight. He couldn't figure out a way to get out. I guess not. I feel like that's not a secure plan. Well, 49:18 it worked. And so the next day they're like, okay, this is not a permanent solution. We got to figure something out here. And so they're like, they realized we have, we don't have even anything close to a plan yet. And they're like, we don't know how we're going to get a ransom. We don't know where we're going to put this guy. We don't know anything about what we're going to do. And we don't know how we're going to transport them. So they start trying to figure out what they're going to do and they ended up deciding, Hey, okay, we can roll them up in a rug and take them to my office. 49:46 Heinz is law firm office. He's not dead by the way, so if you roll up in a rug and you walk him through the office and he just goes hey guys, I'm in the 50:02 I'm in the rug! Here's the rug. 50:10 Okay, so they could he's not dead yeah, so one of them went out and picked up a rug from the rug store and then these guys are dumb. How old are these guys at this point? I mean, I think heines. I don't know for sure, but I think kinds is roughly fifty um cron is younger. He's like okay, when he's early thirties, okay, and so heines is heines is like. Okay, you go out and get a rug. I'll wait for you here. I'll watch him and then he goes gets the rug. They come back 50:37 And they're like, okay, we're to have to drive him outside of town so we can transport him from this car to uh a Volkswagen, a larger Volkswagen van. Sure. We can actually roll the rug up and have him in there rolled up where there's room for that. And so they drove outside of town, they roll him up in the rug and then they drive back to his office. The problem that they realized though was, oh, he's taller than the rug that we got. So now he looks like a pig in a blanket. 51:06 yeah, head and feet are just sticking out this rug and they're like this is this looks more conspicuous and so they just told them. They said they said you're going to have to walk with us into the office and if you say anything we're going kill you and he was like okay in front of everybody. Well, that's what they told. I feel like okay and so they go into his office building. They walk into his office building, walk him up the stairwell, pass his office, yeah, whose office they're going to hinds his office, hinds his law. Okay, okay, okay, the law firm yeah and so they walk them 51:35 up the staircase and then they walk, they walk through the hallway. He hears the sound of church bells and the streetcar outside. And then, and then they walk him past this really long, thin bathroom. And then they take them into this like closet and they say, you're going to have to stay here. And they lock them in this closet. But conveniently, um, for Tao, uh, they had set up like a living arrangement there. So there's like a little bed. There was like a desk. Um, it was like, 52:02 relatively comfortable. was like it was kind of like a cheap airbnb. There's a bad. There's a desk where you can do your little drawings if you want yeah, and so they they came in the next day and they took a suit and they took it. Don't worry about that skeleton in the corner. He's the last guy. It's like very clearly it's on the stick and everything is very clearly from a science class, but they got it. They're like this is the last guy who didn't listen to us. Yeah, 52:30 that's what's going to happen to you. It's the eight foot skeleton from home depot like that's the last guy who did it. 52:40 it's like yeah. I believe that so he didn't fit in the back of his car. Yeah, so the rug was way too small for him, so they they they leave up there our another day. They leave up there another day. Okay, come back in the morning and they take a suit and they go get it dry clean. Now this has been three days. Yeah, 53:03 they take a suit. go get a dry clean so that way he'll look nice and fresh when they drop him back off once nice. We want you to look at looking good and then they and then they leave them there and then at no point they haven't made any demands yet. No and his wife knows his wife's like yeah, you got kidnapped. Hey, where's he got? Where's your husband at now? He's on a retreat right now. You got kidnapped. 53:23 I'm waiting for the ransom. I guess I don't really give me any details. They just told me not to say anything. I let it happen. Yeah, yeah, you know and I'm just waiting for them to do. Well, they're gonna do. does a podcast with his best friend and they were kind of like and and so I just figured it was part of that figured is a bit for the show. Yeah, but maybe this is real now that I'm thinking about it. Yeah, should I be worried? 53:49 worried. 53:56 three hours, buddy. I thought you were said to a bit. You said worried and you were taking a long sip and I was just waiting for you to continue three hours, three at four and a half hours with the reporting going way too long. So I got stuff to do today, so the days start ticking by okay, three days, four days, five days. They're feeding him. I'm yeah, they're feeding him. They're actually feeding him well. They're bringing him like steak and potatoes like they're feeding him well and he's like he's there 54:26 I'm worth $50 billion. This steak is non-medium rare. Like I like the idea that you're being held captive and yet still. But you're still like, this is not good enough for me. And so. 54:54 50 billion dollars 55:09 And then you called it out You didn't just let me do the bit that makes me so You see how easy it is to get him dude 55:24 you're like a kid that like the peekaboo game gets you every time, so if I if I find little new peekaboo's I could be like okay, I'm just going to use this so much. uh 55:41 Okay, so so five days go by and nothing has happened. I just can't believe this show isn't growing by the way we just played peekaboo at six hours into recording. Ali dude, so he's like we're five days into this. Nothing has happened. Yeah, he's like he's like I even he's like hey, guys need help. He's like you guys know who to even ask for a ransom. Well, he's sitting there and he's like and waiting for him to negotiate. I guess well, that's what he says. He said he's a 56:11 He said tail. You are worth two billion dollars. He says you have built a grocery store empire and the way you've built this empire is by going to farmers and distributors and negotiating lower prices. So that way you can sell discount goods to the people of Germany and greater Europe and he's like I can negotiate my release. So the next time they show up. Oh, this is him talking to himself. Yeah, I thought you were saying that Heinz went into the room, sat at the desk and was like tail 56:40 you have negotiated billions like I was like this him. I pick himself up. Okay, okay, okay, so he's he's he's going to start negotiating his rise that so they they show up again. This is day five okay and he says hey, I'll give you guys a hundred thousand dollars if you let me go and they say no, that's not enough and they leave them there for three more days and they don't talk to him and they don't talk to anybody else and it just continues being this thing. 57:10 where they are not taking any action. They kidnapped this guy and they clearly this is such an adhd thing to do to by the way you have a plan. You're like let's kidnap a guy you do. You call his wife or kidnapping tomorrow. You go, you can have a tomorrow and then you put him in your office and then you kind of forgot yeah. You're like I got a couple of things you're like oh you like open the closet to get something like I forgot you there. 57:37 Hey, thanks for listening to things I learned last night. It would do us a huge favor if you could just share this episode with somebody or just share the show. Tell someone you like it. That helps us grow the show. Another way to help us grow the show is to support our merch, which is actually super comfy. We changed to a new merch supplier a couple of years ago called fourth wall. You can buy our stuff at shop.tillin.com. None of this is a pressure by the way, but it just really does help us grow the show and it helps, you know, get the word out and people ask me about my hoodie in the airport all the time. So they're really comfy. Would love for you to support the show. 58:06 And either way, thanks for being here. We're glad that we get to do this podcast. 58:15 100,000. No, I think I want to. I know I can get more. I'll hold on. I'll talk to you later. Hold on. A week goes by you're doing stuff and you hear a little thud in the closet and you're like, is that a goat? Oh, it's that kid. It's that that kidnapped the person. I got Lee. That's that man. I nabbed. I may have nabbed that guy. So, but you haven't 58:43 you haven't asked anybody for a ransom you haven't yeah exactly. They're just holding them and so then they start then they're like we've had them for too long. We need to send a letter to his wife and so they go in there and they say hey here's a piece of paper. Here's a pen. We need you to write a letter to your wife and but you're not going to write it. We're going to tell you what to write so that way it looks like it's from your handwriting but we're going to tell you what to write. Okay, so they dictate a letter to him 59:12 that's basically like, hey, I've been kidnapped. I'm OK. Don't worry about it. Everything's going to be fine. I'll see you soon. But there was no demands in the letter. And they just shipped off the letter to be like, yeah, everything's OK. And so at this point, his wife is like, maybe I should talk to somebody about this. police, two months ago, someone called me and said they were going to kidnap my husband. And I just haven't come to you. 59:41 and honestly it just came one of those things where like every passing day made it worse. Yeah, it's like it's like now it's been too long and then it's like you know so I'm saying I couldn't do it. I didn't do it the day after now I've waited too long and you know so I'm just I'm really starting please don't just I'm pulling the band aid right now. My husband's been kidnapped. There's they don't want anything that yeah they don't want anything. Sorry, sorry. 01:00:08 I don't know why they get down to it. They're not talking. I'm really sorry about that. I'm so mad at myself. I'm so mad at myself. There he goes doing that bit again. Here it is working. Seven hours. We've been recording for seven hours. It's about to reset. It's literally been two seconds. We've hit the limit. Okay, keep going. 01:00:38 so uh so she contacts the police. The police are like oh, we love this. We're going to get on this. um We love kidnappings and so they put together a team to pretend to be his wife and they go to his wife's house, also his house and they wear costumes and I don't understand. They wear costumes, they're armed, they get on a call that they record with the kidnappers and 01:01:09 wait there in costume. You know we got to look like we got to look like them. I got to get into character like that's just a theater kid that works with police dude. Oh, you know what help we get into character. We got to dress like a friggin Mrs Doubtfire. They met her around for a week. I'm a wife and they're like yes. Hello Mrs. Teo. We've talked to we've we've we talked on the phone. Well, two years ago, two years ago, 01:01:39 seven hours ago and so we don't, honestly, you don't remember what she sounds like. So the police, okay, so they go to her house, so they go to her house. He they get the people to call. They get on the phone and they basically negotiate the release with them and what they agree to is a seven million doish mark ransom, okay, which I maybe I should just use the calculator. I was going to try to do it in my head. I was like this is not going to work. 01:02:07 Uh, translates to in us dollars today, this would be about $16 million. Okay. And so enough to pay his debts, enough to build this guy's house and enough for them both to live off of for a little while after this. Okay. And they were like, yeah, I think that'll work. We like that amount. And they say we can meet up at this one location, uh, at this like nondescript location by this lake. Um, and 01:02:37 we'll bring him, you bring the money and we'll do the do the handoff, we'll do the swap. They arranged this meeting and they were like the police said, okay, there's a possibility that they're going to bring a double a body double. It's not actually him and they're going to try to fool us into thinking that this is the guy, but it's not really the guy. And so they said, we're going to have to have a way to verify that it's really him, but we can't bring his wife. That's dangerous. We put her in the line of fire. That's risky. We can't do that. 01:03:05 so we have body double we need that that knows what he looks like. Okay, then I said we need to bring his priest will bring his priest along and the priest will ask him questions to verify that it's him that only he would know the answer to okay. It's like it's like when you forgot your past, what's your first dog's name? 01:03:31 A little priest caller. 01:03:36 Hello, Hello. Hello, child. What city was your mother born in? 01:03:44 And a lot of people don't know that that's how they came up with that for the Internet. I guess it's this it's this case eight hours going so they show up, they get him out of the car and it's it feels similar to weekend at Bernie's because the two criminals they pull tail out of the car and he's like in his suit that they just freshly dry cleaned again because it's been weeks since they got a dry clean last he's wearing sunglasses at night, but they've also duct taped his eyes. You can see the duct tape behind the sunglasses because they don't want him to see 01:04:14 is it just like squares of duct tape over his eyes and he's wearing this like that looks like them, but we can't see his eyes. So I don't know for sure as they say father, it's your job. It's priest father. You're up send in the priest, which honestly pretty sick. So the pretty we need like an action poster where the priest is like ripping through the yeah, the garb and is just like jacked gun just loaded. 01:04:43 cross guns, cross guns. I like the sound of this um so like a BB comics yeah yeah yeah I like that yeah yeah. You always do this, so the priest comes up to him and says hey a couple weeks ago you got a new arm war. What type of wood was it 01:05:13 tail was like I don't know do Mahagany. What the heck you talking about security question is that I did not set that security question up, so he gets that question wrong and everyone's like oh it's a body double and he's like don't worry. I got two more questions for you. These guys aren't smart enough to think body. They couldn't get him in a rug that was large enough for him, so they he's like he's like don't worry. I got a couple more questions and he says what's your wife's name? 01:05:44 so really dialed back the severity after that okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, I know that I know that I know that and then where were you born and so he's like well you got two out of three it's probably him. Good to figure out the armors got me really curious, but I don't know if he don't even know where an arm war is it's like a closet. It's like a it's like a stand up. It's like a stand up cause I don't have a closet. It's like a dresser, but as a closet okay, because you're building to put a closet a wardrobe. Yes, yeah, 01:06:13 It's another word for wardrobe. Yeah. Yeah. So uh they're like, yeah, it's him. And so they're like, okay, you, you pass us the guy, we'll pass you the money. And they're like, okay. And then did the past, they did the exchange and then the police loaded him into the car. They load the money in the car and they left and they went their separate ways and they immediately skipped town. They're like, we got to get out of here. They checked the, they checked their, the, the briefcases. Money was real. They said, okay, 01:06:43 perfect. We're outside town. uh I think we got away. Let's bury this somewhere, so they buried all the money because they were worried it was going to get sure yeah. The police took him home, took him to the wife and said we're not sure if it's really him two out of three questions right and they're like look at them and they took us duct tape off. Didn't have any eyelashes because the tape, but then he was like oh yeah, I'm pretty sure that's him. ah She was like I'm pretty sure 01:07:08 pretty sure I think that's him. It'll do. I don't know. It's been like four weeks. I don't really remember it'll do so. He gets back the next day. He goes back to work at Aldi immediately um and then not even kidding a couple weeks later. He buys Trader Joe's while this whole case is going over. Oh um yeah, and then they start expanding Trader Joe's, um but then the police are like well, we let those guys go, but a plan was like we're going to get them. Wait, so all the interior Joe's are owned by the same people. Yeah, 01:07:37 Yeah, they bought trade. Those trade. It wasn't founded by them, but they bought trader joes and then they expanded them. That's why they feel so similar. They don't feel similar. They feel very similar. Trader joes feels like american aldi. Okay, they feel so so anyway. uh You're been to trade rose trader joes great trader joes. Stop talking. Don't talk about about her joes. Don't say anything. I'm not saying anything bad about trader joes. Okay, 01:08:02 trade of does feels like if someone went into an all day and we're like what if this was a little better? No, I was going to say a little harder to afford to trade. Rose is cheap. Are you kidding? You've not been a trade. It's not the same as all the all these way cheaper than Trader Joe's. Okay, I am telling you, Trader Joe's is affordable. 01:08:25 Okay, I we literally explain it's because I want to or just a trade or jose. The only trader just here is in Lee and the prices weren't bad. It's not worth the drive over to lee would from your house. Maybe I don't know anyways, so I'm not going to let you gaslight me on the prices that trader jose versus the price. I can buy a dozen eggs for three dollars forty nine cents. Yeah, it's pretty and my trader jose versus like 01:08:54 seven dollars at Ralph's yeah seems like you don't know how much it costs. 01:09:02 so he's off by Trader Joe. feel insane. I feel insane right whatever did he's off by Trader Joe's and you what does like work a lot of money supporting us on Patreon. That's pretty cheap. We made that cheap on purpose because no one wants to do it. 01:09:24 No people want to do it. We like them a lot. Thanks for doing it. Thanks for things. No, I already did the pitch. Just move on. Thank you. You get less of this. We promise we cut this with all this stuff cut out. This we make the pores. Listen to this. I'm sorry you're too poor to get to the seven hours of recording. Keep going. So I'm so mad right now he's off by in trader chose the please are like. All right, let's track those guys down. Okay and so 01:09:52 Ines goes home to his girlfriend and his girlfriend's really worried because she knows that he's off with all these other girls. She doesn't know that he kidnapped this guy. Okay, he comes home one night covered in mud and she's like that's weird. There's no mud at your office and she's like what do why so dirty and he's like I was a work thing and she's like it was a team building retreat where we all went out to the woods and then voted one person to die and we buried him. We buried him alive 01:10:21 he's he's is really brought us all together. I don't know if he's alive anymore. It's we all trauma bond it over. Do people keep doing these breakout rooms or they go higher and improv team? No dude, kill someone in your office. Have your whole team coming together and can vote someone out. Yeah, then trauma bond over that. Yeah, yeah, no one will ever quit again because you got dirt on him. 01:10:48 I'm so mad that you ruin bits like this. I hate that you take funny stuff and make it unfunny. 01:11:00 I really hate when you do that. Okay, so you got dirt on. It's really funny because it's like slinging mud on your co workers, so he so the police are like okay. We're gonna track these guys down. I just feel buried. Hines goes to Mexico um and cron is cron was always kind of the the grunt guy in this whole job. It was very clear that Heinz was kind of taking advantage of cron 01:11:29 Yeah, and so cron got stuck with being the grand guy uh hides took seven million dollars and left and gave ten thousand dollars to cron, uh which is not cron to build his house right and not even close to enough for cron to build his house. The police, this obviously hits the news and everyone's like all the ceo kidnapped for a month and his wife said nothing and they're like, but we got to be the main story. Don't worry, we got them uh 01:11:57 we actually have the recording of the phone call with the crook and we're going to play that on air and anybody who recognizes the voice of the guy come forward so we can track him down and get him. And so really yeah, so we have the audio of it. No. Okay, so they play the audio and uh cron is at now cron is at his parents house with his sister. uh 01:12:25 all adult sister and they're just having tea watching TV that night together, the watching family feud back when there was decorum and then this special comes on and they play this the sound and the the story goes. I don't know if this is true, but the story goes that the family all immediately knew that that was him and they all look all this in there and you get a little clinging of the teas and go and everything just gets silent and they all do the thing where they go. 01:12:59 Did you kidnap the founder of Haldy? And so? Nine. 01:13:10 Why do you argue with everything I say? So he didn't even look at deny, deny, deny. That's Tim's playbook. He didn't say anything. You didn't look at his family. He just left. He just got up and left. He goes, this is too. Oh no. So he leaves and his parents are like, yeah, we're going to, I think we're going to have to call it cops and our son. And so they call it in. Meanwhile, would you please get another tip? 01:13:40 on your kid yeah. I feel like all true yeah. I feel like you have to for kidnapping where the guy's fine. I think we're like something really bad yeah. I think you have to because I think what happens inevitably it comes back that you knew and you also go down for it, but it's like you have other people you're responsible. So you're protecting yourself over your kid. No, I literally just said you have other people you're responsible for and so you have the other children. You have your spouse, you have your own plays 01:14:10 so I'm just making sure that if I did something bad, you would not help cover. You would wrap me out because you're like I have other people to responsible for absolutely. Okay, you would rat me out to no I would less. There was a good enough reward in that I would get something for it. I'm going to rat you out for the game. I got to do this for you think I like to help cops yeah. I'm going to hey, I'll tell you for a hundred thousand dollars. 01:14:38 Yeah, I'm starting to negotiate the reward. Oh, wait a minute. Hey yeah, the reward. I thought the reward is fifteen thousand dollars for information on this. Would you guys do all right anyway? We've been here for four days and then they've been record simultaneously get a tip from a shop clerk at an electronic store. Okay, who recently sold a home stereo system and was like hey, I'm 01:15:06 really confident that the guy I sold this home stereo system to was the guy on that phone call. How distinct are their voices? You know, I'm like how did he damn like this? Was he like hey, you better pay the rent and then you hear it. You go. I'm pretty sure I heard that terrifying voice the other day when I sold that stereo system. How unique is your voice? I don't know. That's a good question. So the police, they get a call from both of them and they say let's go to the stereo guy first. 01:15:36 So they go the stereo guy and what they did that was what they always do is they took note of all the serial numbers on the bills that they gave these guys. Oh, of course, and so then they said show us the bills and then he's like yep. This is our guy ah and so they went and they got paul. They arrested paul and paul they entered. They're interrogating him trying to figure out who the other guy involved was paul is like tight lipped. He's not going to talk about it. Meanwhile, hindsight is on a plane of Mexico uh 01:16:04 after weeks of interrogation, there was nothing that they had to point them to Heinz. Paul finally cracks and they managed to go get Heinz extradited and they put him ah on trial for it. Okay, and so both of them ended up getting arrested. Both of them were sentenced to eight and a half years in prison. What's interesting is only half the ransom was ever recovered, so there's three and a half million dollars still out there somewhere buried, and the story is that uh 01:16:32 both of them. They got released from prison. Both of them live pretty low profile lives. After this, we don't know a lot about what they did. Sure, we do know that all in Berg recently died in twenty eighteen and what is largely believed is that that remaining three and half million is what he lived off of for the rest of his life. He may have to go dig that up wherever he had it and live off that because it was only an eight year sentence. It's the moral of the story is it doesn't matter how bad you're at it. It's only eight years in prison. 01:17:03 Eight years. That's how long it took us to do this episode. Wow yeah, so all the ended up becoming like a giant brand to they still own Trader Joe's. It's still on Trader Jones. They still own Aldi, obviously Trader Jones, Trader Trader Jones, Trader Jones, Trader Jones, Trader Joe's cheap, affordable, pretty decent food, Trader Joe's Trader Joe's. Maybe it's not expensive, but it's it feels like it's trying to 01:17:30 appeal to the oh I agree. We actually we thought that we thought it was expensive yeah, so we were shopping around for a long time and then we went to Trader Joe's. I don't know why we went to Trader Joe's because oh, I think I saw like a thing online. It was like one of their pre made meals and I was like oh, let's go try that yeah and I and we went in and I was like wait this pack of chicken is three dollars yeah like this. This is crazy. Yeah, I think I think we do our entire girl. I'm not tell I'm Joe. I'm not joking when I say that we took our grocery bill from like three hundred dollars a week to a hundred and twenty 01:17:59 Yeah, I mean, maybe it is because what I did is what I did was I got a I all I ever bought there was a jar of salsa and it was like nine dollars. I was like this is a pretty pricey thing. A salsa is decent. Nine dollar like organic salsa. I don't remember. There's jars of salsa that are a little 99 cents. That's crazy because that's not what it's not what it was there. Okay, I can't keep doing this with you. Can I go back and forth? 01:18:29 can't do it. I don't think you know how much it costs there. Hey, instead of the fiddle lock, we see the family few theme song. That's prices right. Is that prices right? Okay, wait, hold on. on. I got it. That's very similar. 01:18:55 Hey, thanks for being here. Please share this episode with somebody else. Tell somebody about the show. Maybe not this episode, maybe a different one. Maybe one where we stayed on track more often, maybe share the gardener museum heist. It's an episode where these 40 minutes him. 01:19:13 I'm so sick of you right now. Garment museum. Heises episode where two guys stole a bunch of heart that still fits in and so they taped up the security guard in the basement. It's a great episode. We'll see you next Tuesday for another episode of things on last night.