How XI Jinping Took Control of China

11-11-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of this guy? Man, you describe him for audio listeners. This is this is what's his last name? Zhong Ping, she's on thing, she's eating she's in ping, she's in ping, she's in ping. Yeah, this is the are we learning about you good China China, the what of our to what is this? He's the president right like that what their title title isn't president. The title. I mean he's the president is what it is, but 00:29 and the title is. Let me see what's. What do they call it? It's president. They call it the general secretary of the Chinese Communist Party is what he is. Okay. Are we learning about the Chinese Communist Party? No, we're learning about Xi Jinping. Oh, okay. Yeah, I love that. Yeah, so sorry for listening to this pretty light episode. So if you listen to this China, because you're not going to be able to, there's a last, I don't know, a couple hours before they censored over there because we're going to tell the truth and nothing but the 01:02 That's crazy is what I was saying. Food. Life. Labor. Another one. 01:15 I'm full of y'alls. 01:24 Things I learned last night. 01:32 so she was in a plane and aliens took over his flight and they were like you. We have a leader for the Chinese Communist Party and he was like. What is that? That's how he talks. What is that the Chinese Communist Party? They were like yes, this is all history yeah and then the mud floods happened. A lot of people don't know this according to a girl. I was 02:02 I had a big crush. Here's the thing man and we talked. Do we talk about that on the show already? We already talk about okay, okay, okay, good. I mean she's not going to listen to it. I don't know she might. What if she does? You know who you are, 02:20 Yeah, I keep screenshot of your store. said to Jared and and then you were like, you know, Instagram tells you what you screed. It does. Does it? I thought it did at one point was like this person screenshot of your story. But anyway, yeah, I have screenshot all of our stories just to send them to you. I love that. And then they're seeing your camera roll. That's crazy. All right. What are friends for? But to screenshot stuff well, 02:48 Yeah, you want to talk about Xi Jinping, guess let's do it. Yeah, so Xi Jinping, he was born in nineteen fifty three Beijing. Okay, June fifteen, Xi Jinping is born. ah This is his father. His name is Xi Zhang Jun, very significant person in the history of China, okay, more than the fact that his son ends the current right, right, right, right, because he was a part of 03:16 the communist revolution, and so he he went with now should now jidong. uh There's a lot of names in this just and I'm going to be honest with you. I'm not going to remember all of them, so it's halfway through this. Is it another episode where none of these names are really that relevant? You can just say his dad. Yeah, I guess you're right. All right, yeah, yeah, we can do that. So his dad, his dad and mal we now know mal yeah his dad and mal were leading 03:46 like generals in the revolution and they ended up uh 03:53 his dad, uh she's dad ended up being a person who housed Mao during the revolution and gained a ton of favor with now and ended up becoming a key figure in Mao's party. When Mao took over as the president of China after the revolution and his role, what year was the revolution? um It was in the believe is the twenty twelve. No, 04:22 I think it was like the thirties. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Nineteen thirty two thirty six. It looks like. Okay. ah And so his dad, she and ball, she she's blasting his dad, John June. uh He rose to a leading role in the government. None of that matters by the 04:49 I just think it's confusing if I'm just saying is not I get confused saying his dad. So I feel like I have to give you his name. She's dad. um He's he's he gets a leading role in the military. He's a part of a couple of roles. OK, ends up moving up in the in the in the party, the new Chinese Communist Party to a key role under Mao's government and all the way to a point where he's a part of what's called the eight elders, which is essentially the top of the government. 05:18 which is pretty sick, pretty yes, very sick. Also, they also go by eight immortals. Honestly, can we also talk about how them being called the founding fathers is pretty sick and they weren't doing it for a branding thing or whatever, but that's that goes pretty hard. I don't think they called themselves the founding fathers. I know okay. Okay, I so say they weren't like hey guys were the founding fathers yeah, but I'm saying whoever did that even the Nate like even whoever named them that 05:49 wasn't doing it to be like like a big brother Alliance name like one of the founding fathers. You know, like they weren't trying to be cool. Yeah, yeah, but founding fathers does go pretty hard. Founding fathers is sick. That is pretty. Yeah, I've never thought about that, but you're right. That actually does go pretty dang hard. You know, yeah, it's the alliteration and then what the eight elders, the eight elders. Yeah, they go by the elders. 06:14 and or really sick. They're also sometimes referred to as the eight immortals, which turned out not to be true, um but spoilers, um but now turned out it was only two of them that were more. 06:31 the two of the two of the immortals. I guess you're going to have to put two as implies that it's plural. Yeah, huh, so things were going great until the cultural revolution, which is when now was like hey, what if everybody here thought exactly the same way as I do and then he just basically killed everybody. He disagreed with them. Yeah, she was one of those. He was consistently 07:00 He had disagreements with Mao over his handling of land rights and he consistently was pretty outspoken publicly about how he thought that Mao was handling land rights incorrectly. ah And as a response to this, when the Cultural Revolution kicked off, one of the big things that happened in the Cultural Revolution is they did these like public embarrassment things. And so people who disagreed with Mao, specifically people in like the party, like at the top of the government, 07:27 they would pull them out into the streets and parade them through the streets and everybody would have to like boo them and like say how dumb they were in public. uh And if you didn't go along with it, you were one of the, became one of the outcasts too. Yeah. And so like she, Jim ping was a part of this where he watched his dad get prayed through the streets and he had to like make a decision. What year is that? This would be, let me see the late sixties. 07:57 sixty eight sixty nine and so she's in paying watches. He's a teenager watches his dad's parade through the streets. His mom like renounces him, his father and is like making fun of her dad and then it starts as like ridicule and then it turns into like beatings and then they get outcasted. So it like I say make fun of that's not really what was happening. It was like public ridicule, defamation, beating and then kicked out of the city right and outcast and so his dad was outcasted. 08:27 His dad was outcasted. And so this was a drastic change in she's life because she's whole childhood up to this. He's 15 when this happens his whole childhood. He's living in basically like palaces because he's the top of the government. And so he's got everything at his fingertips. He's got the world before him. They've got all this absolute power and then all of a sudden it's just stripped away from them. And he is then shipped off to go work in a labor camp. Xi Jinping because his dad was ousted. And so he gets shipped off to oh 08:53 um into the countryside to work at a labor camp. Oh, oh the name doesn't matter. He worked at a labor camp in some village where he, and he was excited. We love growth. We love watching someone step into the new person that they are. You go King. Thank you. That was really fun to watch. I will make Tim a good podcaster. If it takes me 10 years, I'll tell you what. 09:23 I got good for a little bit there and then I stopped. I know we all know we've all been sitting here being like whoa. What happened? Tim was at? Well, if you go back about a hundred episodes, you got the opposite of pretty yips. You don't talk about where it's like you accidentally got good for like two years and then you were like ah, the opposite of the yips. I got the pie piece, guys piece. How do you get? Yeah, he still got it, because whatever it was, whatever it was still there. 09:53 him trying to go Pia Pia Pia. This is worth our time. He's got the yips. I'm sorry. Hey, I'm sorry. I made a whole tangent. You made a good move and then I wasted a lot of You know what that's on. Okay, so he gets sent at fifteen. He gets he gets sent to a labor camp. Yeah, and he actually was excited about it. I know we, I know we just said we should, but he genuinely he was excited because he 10:21 did he not know what it was like? He not he don't know the reality of what it was. ah I don't or is he like finally some adversity? No, it wasn't that it was. It was he was he was CCP through him through, so he was like he was like this is part of it yeah and like now was thought and he staunchly believed that like what they were doing in these camps was a good thing and so he thought he was going to learn some things. He thought oh this is going to be a good educational channel experience for me. This is going to strengthen my party alliances 10:51 And it's going to be a great thing. And then he learned that this is bad. It's very interesting because there's a quote. I'm going to pull up the quote, but it's it's very interesting because he talks about it. He almost talks about it like with like this nostalgia, like it was like a good time for him, but he also recognizes it wasn't a good time. So it's very interesting hearing him kind of like balance his uh his opinions on that era of his life, because on the one hand, 11:20 he does feel like it was valuable to him. Like he learned a lot of stuff like he grew a lot and it strengthened his opinion of the country, but on the other hand it was it was a label conditions yeah, and so he what he did not expect was how bad the conditions were going to be and how difficult it was going to be to live in that environment. Okay, he they the he thought they were treating him better. um 11:46 Yes. Yeah. He definitely thought they were treating them better. I don't think he thought that they were treating them well, but I don't think he thought that he were treating them as bad as they actually were treating them. Yeah. Um, he actually, he actually was living in a cave while he was in the labor camp. That's where they had them just in a cave underground. Um, all the laborers. And so he, don't think he expected that. Um, and he, as we mentioned, he came from literal palaces to living in a cave. Right. was a, it was a shock for him for sure. Um, but he calls it the five hurdles. 12:14 He's like, he's like, it was a great time because I was, I had to learn to overcome the five hurdles, which were flee food, life, labor and thought. And so you had to learn to overcome those five things, which were fleas. That's I was worried. Is fleas like, yeah, literal fleas. know, I have owed for come five obstacles in my life, hunger, tired, 12:46 It's food life. So obviously like you're, you could die labor, hard work. Thought is like dangerous thinking and doubt and things like that. And please, please. That's crazy. Food, life, labor, another one. 13:10 And fleas. 13:19 naked or thought food thought the other two every morning part. I'm going to wake up and I'm going to try to take on the five hurt. Yeah, I need to find the five hurdles today. Every time like you like you go somewhere and like they give you some bad food like hey, thank you for helping me overcome one of the five hurtles today. 13:47 I welcome this challenge. Thank you so he he he does six years in this labor camp and then uh he goes back to Beijing to study chemical engineering. I don't know exactly how this works out for him. Like I do know that this cultural revolution there was this this thing where it's like you would have to serve in these later camps until the malists 14:15 we're like okay, yeah, you're on the right side and so it was like until you could labor camps were a way of breaking you. was reeducation through labor got it was yeah and so I think what happened is they came and they like would quiz everybody and they're like okay. I you seem to get it and were the five hurdles what they were teaching or is this like actually going. There are five things that are hard about this like you know. I don't know for sure, but if they were like you have you must overcome the four hurdles 14:46 And he goes. 14:49 Like yes, there's a fifth one uh 14:57 there's there's one more you're forgetting. There's one more and then he tells them and they're like come with us to Beijing and they parade them through town. They're like this is the man who found the fifth heard of the flee boy flee flee flee flee. 15:22 Yeah, I don't think it's gonna get played in China. I don't think they're gonna let this play. They're gonna be cool with this. I don't think they're gonna be cool with it. Okay, so at seventy five he goes back to Beijing to study chemical engineering, which that it feels like a pretty big jump. mean like it's college free at this point. I guess I don't know. I just communism. I mean, here's what's really interesting about the Chinese Communist Party and honestly most successful forms of communism. 15:52 in the world is their communist ish. They're like communist light like they take a lot of those thought processes, but they're also dictatorships yeah, and so like they don't actually function the way a lot of communist ideology, unlike what we live in where the government has no true power and the dictators are the people who have the most money, Sam Altman and Larry Ellison and Larry Ellison and and you know musk, but like yeah. 16:22 it's yeah. I don't know. I don't know. It's so like in theory, it would be in fear, but in practice, probably not. I don't know the actual answer to that, but probably not. What it probably was was it was like it was free. If you if you were a line, yeah, yeah, it was free. If they decided it was free for you, yeah, yeah, that makes sense. And so he goes to sing why university where he studies chemical engineering uh and then he gets a job as a military aid for the Central oh Military Commission. ah 16:51 I assume working in chemical engineering stuff, chemical engineering stuffs serves in that role for a small period, uh three years before the, the, was it? I'd curious. We need to look up how the college stuff works in China. Yeah. I don't actually, don't even now. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know now either. I'm not sure. uh But what was interesting is they had this thing. I can't remember the term for this. Like I think they called me young princes or something like that. 17:21 ah But there was this thing where you had these people who went through the communist revolution and they had the Maoist thought and they had some sort of connection to the party. And so for ah Xi Jinping, it was his father who was one of the eight immortals. Wasn't actually immortal. Now he's an outcast somewhere. ah But he ah had a connection. So he was considered one of the young princes. And so the young princes, they kind of had this interesting thing where they were all vying to take over the roles and 17:51 enter into these high government positions okay, and what typically would happen with these princes, even though his dad was an outcast at this point, he was still he was able to fight his way back through his re education and through accepting the Maoist doctrine, and so he and all the young princes. What typically they would do is they would go into Beijing and they would fight for these limited set of set of government position Beijing, but she's in paying. He was thinking a little bit outside the box. He said look, there's a lot of competition here in Beijing, 18:21 and he's like, but China's a big place and there's not a lot of competition in the other places, so he decided to go to a rural community. You got fleas going on. What's going on with you? What you talking? You're just really over here like I'm yeah, I'm just scratchy. 18:39 Thanks for watching our show. you like it, a great way to help out is by being a Patreon supporter. Doing that helps make this show possible, but it also gets a lot of perks for you. You can get every episode a week early ad free. You get access to a Discord where you can meet a lot of other people who love the show and actually hang out with Jaren and I every month on a hangout. And we're also in that Discord chat all the time, hanging, talking with people, talking about episodes and just random stuff in life. It's super fun. 19:02 We do, there's a way to get birthday messages, a free gift, merch discounts in there. So there's a lot of really great reasons to be a Patreon supporter. You get a lot of benefits out of it. And it also makes the show keep happening. So if that sounds great to you, you can go to support.tillin.com or tillin.com slash support, uh or just tillin.com and search around until you find the links and become a Patreon supporter. really appreciate you doing that. But if not, right back to the episode, right? 19:30 So he goes to this place called Hebe, Hebe, Hebe, Hebe, Hebe, probably Hebe. um He goes to Hebe, which is like a rural town where he becomes the leader of the Communist Party in that county. Okay, I guess they call it the deputy leader and he sir. How do do that? Does he just show up to town? He's like, hey guys, I'm in charge now. Well, it's one of those things like the the princes had this opportunity to fight for these positions and so they were kind of campaign for them. 19:56 whenever an opening open. So my assumption is, and there's not a description of how this happened, but my assumption is there was an opening in this province. Sure. He saw it. And instead of vying for something in Beijing, he's like, let me go take that. And so he went and he took that and he served in that role for three years, was really successful in that role. The people in that town loved him. Um, all this is kind of sub up for debate, but allegedly the people in that area loved him. They think he did a great job. Uh, and when the term ended in 85, 20:25 He then was like, okay, I'm going to move to a slightly larger province because now I've got a resume. Right. And so he took that resume to the slightly larger province, uh, to Fujian, uh, and which was a manufacturing hub. And he takes a 17 year stint, uh, as the deputy leader of the party there. Um, and while he's there, very similar thing, like proposes this whole overhaul of their infrastructure and all of their systems that they have in the, in the whole province. Um, he gets married. 20:54 ah to a singer, which is interesting. I've never, I never knew that he was married to like a I don't know. I don't even know if I ever knew he was married honestly, but ah then in two thousand he becomes the governor of that province, so he gets like a promotion ah and then two thousand two. He goes to a slightly larger province neighboring that city and he stays there until two thousand seven and so what's really interesting is all these princes were over there fighting for 21:24 m fighting for power in different areas all over, but he spent time building his resume yeah in different areas. Meanwhile, all this stuff is happening and he while right when he graduates from college now dies right after he graduates from college when now dies, he's replaced by a new leader and this the new leader basically says hey all that mouse stuff like it kind of got us out of the hundred years of the call like a hundred years of embarrassment, something like that 21:54 and we're in this new era of China, but the mouth thing, a little dark, kind of a dark day in our history, we're going to kind of clean up this whole thing. So they put together this whole rule, this whole new system of government where no one person has the concentration of power as a rule by committee. And so there's this eight person committee at the top of your, to now die 76. Okay. And so it's now this, uh I can't remember the exact phrase, I think communal rule or something like that. But there's rule by committee. 22:22 and so there's an eight person committee that's in charge of the whole government. No one person has all the power. There's one person that's like the top of the committee, but they don't have power. Like they don't have control over everything kind of similar to where we have the three branches of government, but much more dispersed. There's eight, there's eight people with is it there's eight similar. Is they similar how we have checks and balances 22:52 Yeah, there's a bit anyway similar because they had they had eight people with very distinct roles who had charged over eight specific parts of the government uh and can control the things that they can control. They couldn't influence the other portions. There was a person who was technically in charge, but it was more in like title than anything like they weren't really in charge, right? Similar ish ish depending on the company, but similar ish to a corporate board where it's like 23:21 you have a chair and that chair technically is in charge, but at end of the day, if the chair does something that the rest of the board disagrees with, they can be overruled. Right. And they can be ousted uh in most corporations, uh similar concept. And so the, the government of China vastly changes during this era, uh not 23:42 It ish, fastly changes ish. It's still the communist Chinese party. There's still a lot of things like that, but it's becoming a lot less uh restrictive. There's a lot less human rights violations. It's a lot free. ah And so what's really, really interesting is Xi is watching all this stuff happen. He's a person whose father was outcast. He himself was sent to a labor camp. He had gone through fleas and everything and he watches all this stuff happen and he thinks it's a bad thing. 24:12 and he's like frustrated that the government is like departing from yeah because he thought all that stuff was good even though it was really like he got the brunt of it not necessarily the brunt of it but he faced a lot of difficult times underneath that he thought that those were still good things and he still adopted that Maoist thought through all of that and was like strongly committed to it. So in two thousand seven uh shockingly uh he had built up enough of a uh 24:42 enough of uh a resume that he was appointed party chief of Shanghai, which is now he's in like the core of the right. And as a part of that, by the end of that year, he gets put in the one of the nine members. It's now nine members of the Politburo, which is that top standing committee, right? That is in charge of everything. By the following year, he's named vice president of China. And so he quickly 25:11 two ascends yeah and it's interesting. It's interesting when you look at his story because he when two thousand nine he was vice president to who two thousand and eight he became vice president of okay yeah. I don't let me see who the president of China was who Jin Tao okay yeah and he was there from two thousand and four to twenty twelve. He was the president, so they had five year term. I think it's. I think that's something that is difficult because you know we've done an episode about Vlad 25:40 we've done an episode, you know, and now we've talked about she's young thing and it's their older guys yeah and same thing with like net and yahoo. It's like these are older guys who are kind of 25:54 doing sketchy stuff yeah and it seems like because they're older dudes who are have have enormous control over their systems of government that they've been in control for a long time, but it's really only been the past like I mean for for five years only been the last twenty years yeah which relative to you know yeah it's interesting it because it 26:21 and mean we said the same thing in that episode. It just feels like these people have been there forever. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, but they haven't. They have not. Yeah, it's interesting. Even though technically she's been in government for since the eighties, but right he's been in low levels of government and so I think it's I think it's just kind of the impression that like oh this stuff boiled over decades yeah and that's where and like this person was working in the shadows for decades and then that's how they've 26:47 accumulated this force, and I don't think a lot of people realize how fast it can. This person gets in charge and then all of a sudden it's they've changed so much so are like they really can't get out of charge yeah, and it's interesting because a lot of these things like like this is a person who had power, but he didn't have a lot of power and he had these ideals this whole time. So how did he become general secretary so 27:16 You 27:25 So I'm glad you asked, that's the important part. So in 2012, here's what happened. 27:41 2008 2008 he was named vice president. He was named vice president. His first job. His His first job. Was let me see if I can find the title of his first. You know what? It doesn't matter. The growth goblins over here. So he he 28:11 he had two very significant things that happened during his vice presidency. The first thing was his first assignment. He got his vice president uh and so the first assignment he got was the Beijing Olympics. Now you need to make the oh yeah really good and so he took over that role. Beijing Olympics happened and they're a big success. They shone a light on China as like hey, China's not like poor anymore. That was kind of the idea. It was like we got to show the world that we're a part of it. 28:40 and the CCP really appreciated appreciated the work he did for China. I was like, look how normal we are. Yeah, look how look how normal we are. Also look how like advanced we are and successful. are yeah like that was it was kind of like we're we're back baby was what the Beijing Olympics was sure. He also after the global financial crisis, 29:07 He went on this tour basically to be like, hey, the financial crisis was your fault. We're cleaning it up. And so he went on this tour and all these different nations. ah And there's this quote gave during a big international summit ah in Mexico. This is an interesting line. He says, the greatest contribution towards the whole of human race was made by China to prevent one point three, seven billion people from hunger. And then he went on to say, 29:34 There are some bored foreigners with full stomachs who have nothing better to do than point fingers at us. He said, first, China doesn't export revolution. Second, China doesn't export hunger and poverty. Third, China doesn't come and cause you headaches. What more is there to be said? And so he basically was like, hey, we're cleaning up the global ah recession. ah And also it's all of the West's fault is like what he was saying, because they are super rich and making everything harder for the rest of us. 30:04 and the CCP loved him for that. So these two things became a thing where he got catapulted in popularity and the CCP and it was really left him and one other guy were the top of this bullet bureau at the end of uh that presidential term, president who Gentiles, which was twenty twelve. What is very interesting and how do they pick leaders? So there is an election, but the election is by the bullet bureau. 30:33 So there's the nine members of the top of the Politburo and then there is like a two thousand member Congress of Sours and they vote um on those on those nine positions. Sure. It's a closed door vote. Nobody knows who's been selected. Nobody. There's no campaign. There's nothing like that. It's like the Pope. How? Yeah. How you find out is the day that it happens. There's this big party and then the doors open and then the nine people walk out. The first person is the chair or the general secretary. And so 31:03 Okay. The those 2000 people fought for it. And so there was these two people that everyone's like, Oh, it's going to be one of these two. That's going to end up being the new general secretary. And it was, uh, she's been picking one other guy. What's really interesting is 14 days before. What's really interesting. Sorry. Those the fleas. Really interesting. What's really interesting is there 14 days before. 31:28 the the big celebration where they were going to announce everybody. Nobody knows who's been selected. Nobody knows. I don't even know if anyone has been selected. Okay, fourteen days before she's in ping disappears. Nobody can find him. He starts missing a bunch of meetings. The official statement that comes out is that he had a sports injury and so he was out of commission for fourteen days. Oh yeah, a torrid a Ciel. Don't worry about that. Don't worry. Hey, 31:57 Hey, don't worry about that uh and coincidentally within there are six hurdles. 32:09 Hunger. Thought. Life. Food. 32:19 Labor. Please. uh 32:25 Bort injury. And hammies. And hammies. 32:32 okay, hunger food. All right, so he he's gone and coincidentally while he's gone on his sports injury, the other guy also disappears and he has been gone from government ever since he's just gone and then that big celebration and the doors, so basically they both got taken put into a warehouse and then someone was like 33:01 one of you is going to be in charge. We need both of you to pledge your allegiance to us and the other guy was like I'm not going to do that. Okay, never heard from again and it took she's young pink two weeks to be like fine. I'll be your guy yeah and they were like okay. I don't know if that's what's happened. I don't know like there's conspiracy. I know that's what happened. There's conspiracy theories. That's something like that happened. There's curi conspiracy theories that she killed him. There is conspiracy theory like this on Chinese YouTube. So that's crazy theories out there. 33:30 but the official statement is that uh she had a straight up disappeared. Never she a sports industry injury. The other guy uh was corrupt and was banished from the government because he because of crap, but like never seen again. I don't know if he was never seen from again. He was banished from government. I know that for sure. I know that he was he was disappeared from government as what I what I the phrase, the phrase that I've seen okay, disappeared from government uh and so and then this big event happens. 33:59 and the doors open and she walks out in front and everyone's like oh, that's the guy that's been gone for fourteen days with his sports injury walking a really well for a guy who has turf toe yeah and he's he's now the leader of the country almost how long do their turn? Do they terms they have five year term limits? Yeah and so right so we're going to get to the part where he's not gone well. Twenty twelve was the beginning of his first term and then twenty eight 34:29 so twenty eighteen was the end of his end of his first term and so then yeah running through. What are you talking about? Twenty eighteen would be was the beginning. many terms can you do to there's a two term limit? So twenty twenty three was the end of his second term. So let's rewind back to where I said okay. Now we get to the part where he doesn't leave my crazy. Okay, anyway, so he almost well well 34:58 they do five year terms. Okay, yeah. Then two to five year terms. So I mean 2012 plus five 2018 obviously because you're dumb. 35:11 twelve plus five. We don't have to. We don't have to see any longer than we don't got it. We got a lot. you don't want to this anymore. We got a lot to come. I came up with the seventh trial math, food, labor, thought life, fleas, sports injury, math, thinking about numbers, basic edition. 35:37 first grade man, really easy addition, twelve plus five, no, no, no, no, no, no. Let me, let me, 18 was when his present, when the second term began. So the ended in the 17, they had the election. 18 was the beginning of the next turn. Anyways, shut up. I don't have to justify myself to you. I look, I made a mistake. It's whatever fine. Okay. Okay. So he almost immediately goes on this anti corruption campaign, of course, just removing people from government positions that are corrupt. 36:08 And the corruption is interesting because there's no explanation to the corruption. Right. These people are demoted, uh fired, disappeared. uh Disappeared is probably not a good word, like banished into like countryside and worse level positions. Then the official number that we have throughout this corruption campaign in this first term is 200,000 government employees. Holy cow. Corrupt in some way. Yep. Corrupt. 36:38 And so he then reorganizes in middle that term. This nine member Politburo changes and there's people in there that are corrupt that he outs and replaces with people who are not corrupt, who coincidentally agree with everything he says course and think everything he says is right. And so slowly but surely through the course of this five year term, he takes away a lot of this first five year term. Yes, he removes a lot of the barriers. 37:07 that spread the spread the power between these nine members of the Politburo and consolidates him to him. ah And then 37:17 ah And then in 2017, he goes to the Politburo, the big one, the 2000 member Politburo, and he brings uh a new resolution to them. And the new resolution is, I think presidents should be able to not have term limits. And they were like, we agree on unanimous, we all agree. There should be no term limits. 37:41 that you know what now that you say that we like what you just said. Now that you say that I think it's great that you watched you haven't watched what we do in the shadows. Now there's a storyline in it where he has a genie and he brings back. had thirty seven wives. It is you know because he's a vampire. He's lived forever. If you don't know what we do in the shadows is it's a it's like an office style show, but it follows these three vampires and uh so it's our mockumentary, but it's vampires vampires and they've lived for a hundred of years. 38:11 yeah, and it's very inappropriate. It's not. I'm not suggesting you watch it, especially because we're family friendly show, but like it's if you're fine with inappropriate stuff, there's some very funny elements of it where he brings back one of his wives because he grubs a genie lamp and then he's like I want that wife back and he goes. ah I want this wife to agree with me all the time and then for the next like six episodes, it's just her being like whatever you like. I like 38:39 and he is eventually like I hate her. You know, because he's just like he's like she does everything I like. She likes she we never disagree. He goes. This is great. We never disagree. She's wonderful. 38:56 it's very funny. It's a good good little tiny storyline in the thing. Yep, ah so that's what happens. You just surround yourself with people. If you can surround yourself with enough people who are like yes, yes, because their thought is that eventually they'll be the one in charge. Yes, it's what is the reason that they're doing it is not because they're such a big fan of you. Yep. They think that they could one day be in their position. Yep uh and and it's also they're also they're also say what did I say? I said this is the beginning 39:26 that I said no one tries to talk to me until we record yeah. She knows what I'm doing. It's on my calendar. Look at the calendar before you call me. I don't talk to my wife like that and you shouldn't even joke like that. Please look at the calendar before you. I don't say that to her either. Please listen. Here's the deal. If you don't look at the calendar before you call me, I'm going to give you. No, I say hey calendar use 39:53 you got to keep it. Alex is like this isn't funny. Not a funny joke. Well, our favorite thing to do when me and Tim will be in here because we're you know, this is our best friend time. We're talking. We'll be like man, this is a really frustrating thing right here. Here's something that me and my wife fought about and then we'll look at Alex. We'll go. You ever fight with your wife like that and I always goes no. 40:16 there we go. Okay, we cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, so Alex's marriage is perfect and ours are fine. 40:36 Hey, thanks for listening to things I learned last night. would do us a huge favor if you could just share this episode with somebody or just share the show. Tell someone you like it. That helps us grow the show. Another way to help us grow the show is to support our merch, which is actually super comfy. We changed to a new merch supplier a couple of years ago called fourth wall. You can buy our stuff at shop.tillin.com. None of this is a pressure by the way, but it just really does help us grow the show and it helps, you know, get the word out and people ask me about my hoodie in the airport all the time. So they're really comfy. Would love for you to support the show. 41:05 And either way, thanks for being here. We're glad that we get to do this podcast. 41:15 as someone did bring us is why someone said that during the family feud bit that we did someone someone commented in patreon and they were like I like the Jared and Tim were like oh let's all go on family feud and neither of them were like we should bring our wives. We were just like man what other white guys could we bring on family few with us huh? Let's call the other two white guy podcasters. We couldn't even think to shake it up 41:43 that's no gender diversity and we couldn't even invite Shama. You know, we were just like, let's I'm closer with Shama than I am with those guys. was like wow, wow, we need to make a team of podcasters. It's you, me, Alex. Who else do we know? does kids we else? Who else could we? Oh my gosh, our wives. No, no, not them. The ninjas are butterflies guys, our actual families. No, that's good. I appreciate that. 42:12 uh so yes, I was just saying she was calling me yeah all her back after this sounds. I love my wife. She's great yeah cool in twenty eighteen. I love my wife. 42:26 I love her. I love her. I love her so much in twenty eighteen. They have their big celebration yeah where it's like who we got to the new, all the bureau, new, Paul, a bureau guys, guys, unanimous vote doors open she jim pings in the lead right and everybody knows when they see him everybody. Everybody expects it because of that because the way was it man had been working two thousand people yeah because the way it had been working before and because that they eliminated term limits, everyone kind of expected it, but to see him walking out is like oh hey 42:55 this guy's going to president until he dies now. And it was kind of confirmed in that moment. And so this next term was a very interesting term because this is when it kind of ratcheted up pretty strongly. And so obviously you still have the anti-corruption campaigns happening. Anytime anybody does anything that the government thinks is corrupt, they are ousted in some way. um The government took over um like the 43:21 press doesn't exist. Anything and everything where anybody could have any sort of ability to say anything ah publicly, the government could come in and be like, no, that's corruption ah and you could be removed from whatever poster and or banished out to a different side of the country or imprisoned or things like that. And so that whole thing got uh continued, but censorship became a big thing in twenty sixteen right and so the government 43:51 they uh created their own own media and they brought together all the news and all the public media is all government owned and they began pumping out propaganda. uh They also uh employed this group of I.T. professionals whose entire job is just Internet censorship. Yeah. And so they control what is broadcast through the Internet to the people of China. 44:19 And so vast majority of the internet are not accessible. Um, and these people, it's very interesting. They spend hours and hours and hours a day just looking at posts on China, the Chinese internet and finding these things that are, uh, for lack of a better term, like dog whistles for anti-communist propaganda or anti-communist thought. Um, and so then they find those and they block any of those things. And what is interesting in 2019, 44:48 They created this new, I guess, law where you have, they call it the internet real name system. And so every person on the internet, have their real name attached to their account. Yeah. The way we have IP addresses, they have this uh code that links to them, that links to their actual identification and what they're doing online. you do online is traceable uh back to you personally. 45:15 and so all of your devices have to have that ID attached to them. Anything you do will be linked back to you and so whenever those those censorship arms find these things that are the anti communist thought, they then trace that back to whoever it was in prison that person yeah and so and stuff like this is like all like where people in America are like oh this is all fear mongering for us like that could never happen here. Yeah, 45:41 and I was just trying to say earlier, like with how fast that takeover happened, yeah, like it could. I'm not and I'm not trying to say like oh, this administration is doing it like I'm saying it could happen here like that. Yeah, it can happen anyway uh and it's it's significant to say because this this government was that's where I think is what's frustrating about the current moment that we're in is that any kind of stuff that's leaning that way where you go. Hey, that's going that direction. Yeah, 46:08 people will go. Oh, you're just falling into the the hating the two parties stuff or whatever. Like if this side saying it, that means it's this side is completely right. And it's just like guys, yeah, that in fighting is going to lead us straight there. Yep. Yep. Yeah. It's dangerous. That's dangerous stuff. And they, and, that's the thing is similar to Russia. This, I mean, honestly, even more so than Russia did China when Xi Jinping took over had a distribution of power, right? And like 46:37 This was not something that anybody thought was possible centralized. Yeah. And this was something where slowly but surely he chipped away at that separation of powers and consolidated it. And now he's got absolute power. Right. And so under this second term, he went and he he reformed the military when he took over. I think there was two hundred thousand soldiers. He upped that number up to two million and he drastically increased the military spending budget to now the second. 47:06 largest military on earth, ah and so he was like we need to only behind us, the USA. oh That's right, oh because 47:23 So changes a bunch of laws honestly just completely changes the entire. I'm not going to crash out of the podcast was so yeah. Let's keep going. It is the fabric of the entire country. I thought about crashing out for a second, but I hey that's growth will crash out in the after the fit. Heck yeah uh completely changes the fabric of the entire and the entire government during this the second term, uh but what was the most significant part through the second term ah is he began building this cult of personality very similar to what now had 47:52 and it's called right being thought and she's in big thought. This is why I think he was the one who came up with those five uh trials. Okay, because she's in big thought is very much that mentality because just such a gin ex coated like you've got to overcome these things and I'm going to make sure everyone goes through them. So he literally has it broken out. She's in being thought is just ten affirmations, fourteen commitments, 48:22 thirteen areas of achievement, six musts and then a worldview and a methodology. Oh my gosh, and he has all these books. I think he's got six books that he wrote of his thought of how he thinks the world should work and how everybody should think and how the economy should be and all this different stuff and how everybody should behave in a good society. Yeah, it's just Jordan Peterson's twelve rules of life book, essentially stuff like that. Yeah, m 48:52 but what's so interesting, I didn't know this until researching for this. He basically built, he built this app and it's basically duo lingo for season being thought and it's tied to your ID. Everybody has to do it every day. You have to log time in every day that you're practicing your season being thought and it's your daily devotionals where you go through it's great and there's courses and there's exercises. So they're conditioning a cold, they're conditioning the 49:18 Oh my where it's like it's like you're clearly a part of this. You're learning these things, you're adopting these things and you're you're how stuff is re is uh people will fight back and push back against this stuff like when we like if I make a clip of this and put it online, I know for sure the bot comments are going to be like oh, this is misinformation that doesn't actually happen. You guys are just fear mongering China. Yeah, well yeah, there are bot they have bot farms that go out and do propaganda worldwide. 49:45 to try to make them seem better than they are, and I think that's one of the really interesting things about this, and you see his military parade. Yeah, it's probably one of the funniest videos I've seen this year. He's riding full like and his arms are in the car, so it's just like he looks like a little like one those little whack a mole games where he's just just on the top of the car and then he's saying stuff. He's saying stuff like uh I don't know soldiers and they all go yes like yeah. You're gonna pull the video. Have you seen this video Alex? 50:15 it's worth it. Let's put it. Let's put a clip of it in the episode. You got it. Give me a second. I'll have to find out right. This is so funny because the microphones are on the car. Yeah, this is so funny. All right, some sound. I mean this is just got. We don't need sound because this is just gonna be the news. I do want something over it. No okay. Well, you're not show us the video. Okay, here we go. 50:42 it's so and he just looks bored to be there the whole time. Just soldiers. That's what I'm saying is like he didn't try to look triumphant. He didn't try to look like a strong man. He literally looked tired to be there like he's just standing out of the top of the car with four microphones and he's just like he's doing their chance back and forth their their call and responses and he's just like soldiers. Yes, 51:12 I don't know if we got any other shots of that with the car yet because then he gets out. This is an eight hour broadcast news broadcast from this is crazy. Well, it's interesting because they did a lot of weapons that they had in there that we did not know they had or at least maybe the maybe our military. Yeah, found it by Googling it dude. Oh my God, I just put it on take talk. They hear some sound 51:40 And he just, yeah, I'm going to send you this. 51:46 He looks so bored. 51:56 Yeah. 51:59 Someone else is yelling and then. 52:16 he's mad that he has to read his lines. He looks like an NFL player at the end of a loss. We said that in front of the news cameras where he's just like you know why I'm here. You know yeah like that's what that is. I'm gonna be here. We didn't play well. I'll send this to you so you can send it to that guy 52:33 Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, so yeah, they were for the military uh and I think that's what's really interesting. You got nervous. You don't want to make fun of G. I'm paying too much because I'm like, look at this. Isn't this? Isn't this really dumb that he's just like saying hello? Greeting comrades. So you're really dumb. I didn't know. How are you doing soldiers? I don't know what I was gonna bring. He literally looks like like it looks like if I came, you know what I'm happy to be here. 53:03 That's all it takes. All it takes. He looks like he's in this thing against his will. He looks like he's dead. Hello. Hello. Welcome to my parade war. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. Don't say that. Put that guy in the camp. 53:27 It's a It's a trap. What is it good for? Kill that guy. uh He's just setting you up. 53:41 You gotta yell. It holds our civilization together. We have to, we have to have a giant military because we're so financially compromised that other companies can take us over because of our debt to them. But because we have a stronger military, we can defend ourselves, but because we haven't done fiscal responsibility, we can be easily manipulated and controlled based on the amount of money that we owe them. What is it good for protecting our liabilities? 54:09 Yeah. Oh, sorry. Was that too much? Yeah, too much to put in the family for the podcast. uh What it was really interesting is and this is this is kind of I think this is what you get in a lot of societies and yeah in this system. uh There is the people on the end. This is working very, very good for of course, and so this kind of back to what you were saying about the bots who are like, oh, this is misinformation. This isn't true. There are people who uh 54:39 live at the top of Chinese society and they are living a great lifestyle. ah You see those videos come out of China with like the super futuristic cities where things are really safe ah and everything is like very clean. The people who live in those areas, like they're living lifestyles that honestly are probably better than what we have here with the exception of the freedom thing. ah But they they're like day to day lifestyle is probably at 55:07 at the minimum comparable, if not better than our day-to-day lifestyle here. But if you're on the outs, there is this gap that is monumental. there are, uh for example, you might have heard of the Uyghur population, this Muslim population in Eastern China that has been subjugated since the beginning of... They're doing legitimate atrocities and genocides. Yeah, legitimate genocide, yeah. Just because these people are... 55:35 wheat, a weir population. There's no other reason for it and so there are people on the outside that are living through just completely terrible conditions and I think this is ah this is true in a lot of societies in China. I think it's pretty ah is polarized pretty strongly where there are people that are living incredibly well and that's what I mean. Whenever I you know I kind of not really kind of joke about how we're in a dictatorship of technocrats. 56:04 But that growing wealth inequality. Now the whole thing in the United States is that we, we still cling to the myth of mobility that, you know, Oh, you could win the, you could essentially win the lottery by starting a good company that then shoots you to that thing. Right. There's all kinds of things in the way of that, but we still cling to that. Like, some people still shoot the gap. 56:25 so it's possible. So we don't have as big a problem with it, but that gap is widening, it's like an alarming rate and not just like a, it's widening. It's like guys, you got to look at these numbers. It is widening at a alarming rate that we're not like the people down here are not to the conditions of what you're talking about in China yet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. China's got this canyon, this divide between them. 56:52 there is a growing gap in the states. That's nothing compared to what China has nothing compared to that yet, yet, but yeah, there is, it could there are early signs that if we don't stop it yeah, yeah, that's definitely true. That's definitely true and so to your point you talked about like oh, eventually with you know if now I don't think AI is actually going to do what they predict exploring to do. That's kind of the whole thing as well, but if it were to do put forty percent of people out of jobs, they predicted it would and you were like well, they're going to have to do universal basic income. They're not gonna 57:20 Yeah, you know, not to burst that bubble for you. They're not going to set up a system where we all get checks each month and they they're gonna let you be poor. They're gonna show how you starve. Yeah, yeah, I don't care and you're like you're like no, no, they wouldn't do that. They're already doing it. We we currently living in the United States live in the rich neighborhood and people who live in Mexico don't people who live in in the African countries that we're exploiting for a lot of our resources don't live in the good neighborhood. Yeah, 57:46 and they'll just move that here where then this state or these this area, this region will be the good neighborhood and then you will live where you live. Yeah, yeah, not to sorry to get this dressing, but like that's I think that's with the the and again, I'm not trying to be like oh, capitalism is bad, but I'm saying this myth of of mobility that we're we bought into so much has kind of eased our 58:12 movement into that gigantic gap. The problem is, is that the people on the other end of the gap are not the government, which could be, you know, in theory overthrown or restructured. They're the rich and that's like, we can't over through that. You know, I think, I think what the, I think the, the moral of the story here is for decades in this country, the, uh, the, the headline is communist is bad. Capitalist is good. Right. 58:40 that's that's why you see this difference, and that's what our message is is communism's good. No, no, no, no, no, the system itself, the system itself. It doesn't really matter. The system it's who's in tiny people to know that I'm joking like this. I feel like there's some people were like wow, Jared's really falling off. No, she'll it let him make his point. The system itself doesn't really matter. What matters is who's at the top and read a hundred percent of time systems will be corrupted every time depending on what 59:10 You know, yeah. Who's in charge? Are they corrupting the system? And, ultimately too is like, how much are they corrupting the system? Because before she's in pink took over and they had this distribution of power, there was a lot of people who were in charge of different things that were corrupt. Like there were multiple stories of corruption and people being removed from power who were embezzling funds and doing things similar to what we have had it throughout the United States history. She's in pink turnover and he 59:38 ratcheting up corruption to it to come of course insane level, but it's just like how corrupt is that person in charge and how far are they willing to take it right and I think we we kind of follow this myth that it's like oh, it's the system. That's the problem. It's not the person who's abusing this right right right and so not that we're trying to justify communism. Yeah, I don't I don't think I don't think whatever we can talk about in the after the fiddle. guess yeah, but 01:00:07 All that to say he is now in the middle of his third term, which wasn't something that you could do right for. ah There's no sign of him ever having an in his seventy seven. What did I say? He was born in fifty seven to three. Did I say hold on? Let's see. He was born in yeah, fifty three. So so he's seventy two. Yeah. So he he's probably going to be in power until he dies. He has radically changed the government. Everybody else who's in control. Did you just text me? 01:00:37 it takes you to the link to the video. Oh, it just came through. I was like, when did you do? Okay, so he's probably not. He's probably not going to leave his position until he dies. What is really interesting though is he has completely reformed China, so even when he removed from power, yes, the next man up can't undo the corruption. Well, the next probably won't want to the next man up is in his thought. 01:01:07 is they've been doing Duolingo for Xi Jinping brain every day. And so the odds of it being someone who's a dissenter is pretty low to begin with. But even if it is, it is a drastic overhaul of what he's built to undo it. And so it's probably not going to change. All that being said, the things he has done has turned China from a third world country to at least 01:01:35 major portions of the country, a first world country, which is pretty insane and it's crazy how that works. If you're just corrupt and you just kind of do whatever you want and then the country to your will, you can make it pretty rich. It's pretty crazy. Well, this has been an encouraging time. We appreciate you hanging out for things. learned last night. Our next episode is our three hundred and we promise it'll be a joy filled fun time, so we'll see you next week. He doesn't know what we're talking about. 01:02:05 So, okay. Now we're in the after the fiddle here. Sorry. Fiddle off. 01:02:10 300 episodes can't figure out how to end one and thanks for checking out this episode. If you like it you should watch Vladimir Putin. We talked all about his rise to power. So if you like finding out how Xi Jinping became his dictator find out how Russia got a dictator it's a great episode really honestly crazy story and hey if you want to see next week's episode right now you can do that on Patreon but becoming a patron supporter we love our patrons. Thank you so much for your help of making this podcast happen but we'll see you next week on another episode of things island last night 300 episode 300 next week. That's exciting.


For decades, China has stood as one of the most powerful nations on earth. At the center of that rise stands one man, Xi Jinping. His story isn’t just about politics; it’s about power, control, and the transformation of an entire country. Understanding how Xi Jinping came to lead modern China gives us a glimpse into how influence and ideology … Read More

This Mom’s DNA Didn’t Match Her Kids | Lydia Fairchild Ep 298

11-04-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of Lydia Fairchild? Lydia Fairchild, Lydia Fairchild, no Lydia Fairchild here. You want to look at her? Yeah, here she is. This is her and child okay or fair child. Is this like an eighties picture? Eight and eighty. This is nineties. Maybe this is a for those it's a it's a you know old picture and she's holding a baby and the baby is just like 00:29 I think this is nineties because because the story takes place. Is that her baby? Yeah, that's her baby. Okay, here's another picture of her where honestly in this picture she also with the baby also with the baby baby and on and on a house phone. Oh, how the baby was flipping us off for a second, but it's not a little ring. Very close in this photo though looks kind of like Heath Ledger. Okay, are we? I don't know if we can bully her like that. 00:57 I don't know story. You know the story she does she that's a beautiful woman. I he fled her is a beautiful man. Okay, so anyway, 01:12 She's like, but you might have had to dig around a little bit and find out what's going on with your DNA. And she's like, yeah. And that is not the way the doctor brought that to her. That's the way I was like, you might know I'd dig around a little bit. The doctor was like, mind if I just like poke and broad and just kind of figure out what's going on with you? Things I learned last night. 01:42 What's the story? Who's so fair child, let me for your child, let me for your child and her. I don't know if this is her husband or a boyfriend. I'm not sure I've heard conflicting reports. I've seen completely r for reports. They don't have the same last name, but that maybe that maybe she's a modern woman, neither do me and my wife right now. We couldn't find our mayor's certificate for a long time, so also it's like a whole. It's a really big process. You got to read to your passport, your driver's. It's a lot of work. It's just 02:07 Oh my God, which I mean it really is. If you think about it, it's just the patriarchy keeping their thumb down on a woman because it makes it much harder. It's just so much harder to separate from a man. If you have your name stuck to them, you got to go change all these documents. You're just kind of yeah, you're tied, you're tethered legally. I mean, yes, 02:28 Like is it really worth leaving that man if you have to go to that many notaries? 02:37 Oh, I've been wanting to leave my husband for years, but I just can't find an open spot on my calendar to go get that notarized. Okay, so what what is so Jamie Townsend okay? Is her husband or boyfriend? I'm not sure this is a later photo. The babies are obviously yeah and there are three kids yeah. They have three kids. This story takes place specifically in two thousand two while she's pregnant with a third child. Okay, and when this happens uh sometime during the pregnancy, 03:06 they couldn't had unresolvable differences. They end up separating okay, and she has three children that she's trying to support. She's pregnant and wait, wait, wait. She's pretty with her. You said their third child. Sorry, she has two children. She's pregnant with a third child, but that's a picture of all three of them. So they resolve their conflicts. It appears so either that or they are there. They are sticking together for the kids and taking great photos at the mall, sure, which is something that just is sad. We don't have anymore. 03:34 the photo shop three minutes right now. I you to remember this forty minutes from now when Tim goes, we're only halfway through the story. It's just it's just it's sad like we used to be able to just walk in the mall and get some not great photos done like I miss those days. We did it. We've got those lying around here somewhere. 03:56 stop. What do you do? No talk about them all. No, I've done talking about the mother. No, you ain't. You want to spend a lot of time our podcast. Oh my gosh speaking of balls. Do you want to talk about subway? We said we were going to talk about some way this episode. We kept people on their toes for a week. Should we just go playing block blast right now? I'm busy. 04:19 describe it to the audio. So I'm playing block glass, which is it's a it's like a tetris type game. My high score is forty seven thousand. Here's my conspiracy on this by the way. I do think that they have made this game easier in the last ah because they used to be way hard. My high score for a long time was fifteen thousand and now it's forty seven and it's like I've scored my highest scores in the last. 04:46 So I think this game was too hard and they just made it easier to be honest. I really do. Why was the motivation so people play it more? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, you don't want it to be too hard. That's what I'm saying, but you know, what are you going to do? not very fun for you because you're too good at it, right? Yeah, I'm just I'm so good at this game. You're like I want the old one back where it was harder. Give me the old one where it wasn't as easy. Anyways, put that away and talk to me about something just anything. 05:15 No, no, you wanted to go off. I, I, you're talking about be a full tangent. It was literally just a side comment where I was just like, I just missed the photos places of them all. Okay. That was all that wasn't why you got that out. Be this thing where you know, I'm glad you got it out of your system, buddy. Let's talk about Lydia Fairchild. So she, her and Jamie separate, put your phone away. I know you're like, Oh, I got to finish this level. The game is so easy, but he can't finish this level in less than 45 seconds. 05:43 oh five and a half minutes dude, so you're on your phone. I miss her. You go to the mall dude and like they had like this there for those who don't know there was like a store. My mom loved the store by the way. My mom, whatever those whatever glamour shots or whatever was called 06:11 my mom loved this place because they would have a whole drop down. You know they could put the they always props and stuff and you know my mom actually started to move away from it in. I remember this real clear like two thousand and eleven. My mom and my my dad my mom my mom and my dad my parents. They got my mom my dad my my parents who are my mom and dad 06:40 that's how you talk. It sucks. It's really hard to listen to. Oh sorry. I know that's you and so uh they got these photos and they like they did the face tune thing to my mom so much that she looked like way too smooth and she got them back and she was like just give me the unedited pictures. Normal photos please. Oh it's bad yeah because they weren't like trained 07:08 they were just like like yeah. They were high school student. They were like smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, smooth, 07:36 I don't know how far, I do know she is pregnant with her third child at this point. Okay. I would guess with the way the story goes, like it's early in the pregnancy should be my guess. Um, very early in the pregnancy, honestly, 2002 with how this timeline goes out 2002. Yeah. Um, and so she goes, uh, because now she's on her own, a single parent, right? Um, she goes in and she applies, um, for child support and, uh, 08:04 Obviously when child so when you go in for child support normal procedure is they DNA DNA test the children and the father to make sure the father is actually the father um Because you you don't want to force someone to pay child support for right kid That's not their own kid. And so they go in very routine thing do it um Had to wait a couple weeks and then they call her and they say hey, we think you should come down to the 08:28 office. I almost at station. Yeah, she come down to the come down to the manager suite. Come on down to the manager suite. did. They did this test that twizer us and and while we we think you should come down for for these results and she's like never a good sign. She's like you could just tell me over the phone. She's like no, like no, we can't. We'd really like to tell you in person and so they sit down in the office and there's video of her kind of like we're counting this story and she said it was very awkward like 08:57 it was very like, it felt very tense in the room when she got there and like everyone was like, there was not like pleasantries exchanged. It was like sit down and then they were like, Hey, so result came back a hundred percent. We can guarantee Jamie is the father, um but you aren't the zero percent. You're the mother and so of the baby inside of her, no, of her children, her two children. Okay. Yeah. And so she says, 09:27 um excuse me. I I remember I know for a fact these are my children. I gave birth to them and so they start like grilling her. ah Why does they think that she is like trying to commit like welfare fraud or something like that and so they're grilling her asking her all these questions. um They start asking her like do you have a sister? Could these be your sister's kids? ah So the DNA can say zero percent chance that it's yours. Yeah, 09:57 but it's a hundred cent Jamie's. Okay. And so they're very, they're very like, she says like she was getting grilled and it was very, it felt like an interrogation. They were asking all these questions of like, are, are you actually Lydia Fairchild? Like, did you do something with the real Lydia Fairchild and like you took her kids and she's like, no, I'm the real Lydia Fairchild. She's like, here's my ID. Like here's all my papers. Like we've gone through this whole process. Like I'm, I am me. These are my children. I remember giving birth to them. Like, 10:25 I did. There's some must be something wrong with the tests and so they end up going through this whole like interview where they're like their honor. She any pictures from when she was pregnant? I don't have any pictures. I'm sure she does right, but I don't have any pictures and so they basically were like look. We can run another test, but the guy straight up tells her in this thing and he straight up says we're going to take your kids away because these are not your 10:55 kids like we're confident that it's a zero percent chance we've we've got the DNA results. And so she's obviously distraught. Yeah. And so she starts going through all the possibilities. She leaves this. She's like, what are all the possibilities of what's going on? She really thinks like the DNA test must just be wrong. There's I suppose the possibility that something happened like in the hospital, maybe these got switched and they weren't my kids, but it's like, well, no, it's Jamie's. Yeah. 11:23 it's yeah. This is actually Jamie's kids, so maybe he had two baby mamas in the hospital at the same time and they were in different rooms and he's got them all mixed up and he was like he's like I need to go to the restaurant real quick and then he to the other person was I go to the bathroom. You got it, you got it, babe, you got it, I got a poop again. 11:48 I'm just a nervous pooper. I'm so nervous right now. When I was, when, my baby was born, there was another dad there. Did I tell you this story? Uh, there was an, there was only one other baby being born that on our floor that day. Um, and the other dad, when it happened, uh, he got, uh, sick and he passed out and he had to like go to the ER cause he hit his head. And so, uh, I remember 12:16 at some point during the day, like I went down for lunch and came back up and I rode the elevator with him and he was like bandaged up and then the nurse, the nurse told me later. She's like yeah, we've had an eventful day and she's like she's like. Are you going to pass out because I don't want another one of the he doesn't remember that yeah yeah that's embarrassing. I think I think he had yeah, that's embarrassing anyways, so she's trying to figure out what is going on. 12:46 meanwhile the the state is like starting to come after her and they're like taking her to court and so they take her to this court and then she start she's trying to tell the story to this is like a ongoing process then yeah. This is not like a one day thing. This is something that's going on and where her kids during this so she still got him at home like they they have to go through the process to be yeah. They can't take they can't just back. These are ours and so yeah they're home with her. Jamie is trying to like vouch for her and be like yeah, they're 13:15 she's like on the father which for her yeah like I'm the father. That's their mother. We're not together, but that is their mother his her parents are defending her, but the longer this runs on and the more the state starts to a lot of people start to have some doubts. They're like like it's strange like we know we were there at the birth like we know this, but something has to be going on for her to not be showing up in DNA. Like how is that possible that she's not showing up in DNA and so 13:44 uh they uh they take they take her to court and the judge is like hammering her at court because she's the judge is like this is fraud. You're committing some kind of fraud and we're going to get you for it. She shows up without a lawyer because she did all this searching for lawyers and no one would pick up the cake because they were like yeah this is obvious like no lawyer will take the case. Yeah no lawyers taking the case because they all think it's obvious that she's committing fraud because there's no ray of the evidence. Yeah there's no way a mother would come up with a zero percent 14:15 a zero percent match. It's not even like it's not like it's like a sixty percent. It's a zero percent match that she came up as and so she goes to court. The judge is like I suggest you get a lawyer. She's like I tried. No one wants me and and so they have this initial hearing. It does not go well. Well, didn't she get a lawyer though like there's public defenders? Well, I don't know. I don't know in a case like this because this isn't 14:43 I'm not sure in a case like this. I don't know enough about how this stuff works like this isn't like she was arrested and she's facing like a criminal trial like this is, I guess, technically a civil trial. Okay, you still got a lawyer. Do you do they provide a lawyer in the civil if the if the state is suing you for something? Yeah, I don't know if they're technically suing. Okay, I don't know. I don't know if the state provides a lawyer in a situation. I don't know. Maybe they do 15:11 but all I know is she was going to defend herself because she couldn't find someone to sure be her defender. The judge was like I suggest you find a lawyer and she's like I tried I can't find one and so basically they go to this hearing and they say okay well you're pregnant. So this works out perfect. What we're going to do is you're going to have this baby. We're going to have a representative of the court there to witness the birth and immediately we're going to DNA test both of you like that same moment. 15:40 and we're going to this feel so crazy okay, and then we'll be able to know ah if there's just something weird about your dna yeah. If there's something amiss or if yeah and so so you're in the you're in the hospital legs up trying to give birth yeah and there's the father doctor comes in and goes uh you know hi. I'm I'm doctor tiler cocks and 16:10 and so and and he goes okay. This is the father who is that's there's judge in the robin and next to a stenographer 16:29 Have you seen that they had like mouth stenographers now? Oh yeah. With like they've got like this like weird it looks like an oxygen mask. It's crazy looking. 16:39 crazy right to an ASMR and whispering the court case. 16:49 Hey, join us on Patreon if you want this to be ad free and also there's tons of other perks you get to all episodes are ad free. You get next week's episode right now and you get to do monthly hangouts with me and Tim like we really look. It's like a virtual just hangout room and we play games together. We talk. We have show and tell sometimes we've made a lot of good friends through this and so it's a really good time to do that. So either way, please share the episode. Tell somebody about it. These are all those ways to help us grow the show because we love doing it. We want to keep doing it. So thanks for being here. 17:23 now they just got to watch or give birth. Yes, they're watching her give birth, which is so weird. Yeah, it's very weird. It is very weird. Imagine the other side of that too. You're just the guy who's got to go watch a lady early birth that you don't know. It's like you're leaving. You're getting the kids ready for school in the morning. You're making a breakfast right and your wife's like yeah. What do you guys do today? Oh, I got to watch a lady give birth. I go watch the miracle of life. 17:51 Oh yeah, I yeah. I actually went to three other ones last week to prepare what I just want to make sure I know you know. I make sure I know what I'm looking at. Hi, sorry. Can I sit in on this birth? Excuse me. Who are you? It's for the I'll tell you who I am and that's classified. I live in a secure facility doctor. uh I need to see this board. Here's my badge. 18:21 that you got to look quick. That's the thing about badges got a quick. We flash a really quick. That's the whole thing about that. You got to look fast, so yeah, this guy with questionable credentials is there for the birth witnesses, everything and then is like all right. Let's do this DNA test. They time flies when when giving birth. I don't know if that's true. It did fly being there. ah I don't know about the doing it part. Oh yeah, 18:50 that's slow and excruciating and awful. I heard yeah anyways, ah so she she gives birth. They take the baby. They do the DNA test. They DNA test her in that moment like at right away. Wait, when is this now? This is it's still two thousand two. Okay, you don't have like a you don't okay. I don't have an exact date. Yeah, I don't have the exact date and so they're there for the birth. They go back to court. The DNA results come back and at this point like 19:17 Jamie is pretty invested because Jamie doesn't want his, even though they're not together, he still wants his kids to be raised by their actual mother. And so he doesn't want this whole situation either. so they've talked a lot about this and they kind of came to the conclusion that the best case scenario is that this one comes back that she's 0 % too. Because if it comes back as this is her child, 19:44 then that kind of proves to the court that she's lying about the other two. And so they're like, I don't know how that happened that these other ones came back zero, but we're hoping that this one's zero too. Right. And so they come back to the court and the result ended up being it's a zero again. So she's a 0 % match. And so they witnessed the birth though. They had someone from the court who witnessed the birth. Okay. And so you would assume because they watched it happen, they would say, yeah, you are the mother, but instead what the court says 20:14 is we think that you're committing fraud through in vitro fertilization and we think that you were somehow and I don't know there is like black market and vitro fertilizers out there. I guess if the court thought that that was what was happening and so they said that you're carrying someone else's child and trying to commit fraud and get money from the state through that and so they still are taking the case against her and moving forward with the case. Okay, 20:43 so we need a welfare check. We need some money. We need to be on food stamps. What's what should we do? Let's have three children, carry them in my body, give birth so that I can skim a couple hundred dollars a month from the government and the US government. That's probably the best plan. Let's do that. Yes, let's do that. 21:11 Okay. Yeah. Yeah. You're thinking the right way. So she begins, so this happens. She now has, um, uh, uh this third situation. So she then thinks, okay, because of this third child and this third set of DNA tests with a court witness, she says, maybe I can go back to the, all these lawyers that shot me down and maybe someone will be like, okay, this is actually interesting. Maybe there's a case here. So she got, starts knocking on the doors of more lawyers again. 21:38 to write. Okay, hey look, this just got more interesting. Look, they watched me give birth. Yeah, and they still what? Excuse me, ma'am. I don't think you're in a real court. I don't think this is an actual thing. 21:52 the whole thing was a set up a fake court. That's crazy. Yeah, we're going to assign Brian to watch you give birth to a baby. It's just his fantasy football punishment. You know, I'm talking about like he lost the league and so now his punishment is to watch someone give birth. All the other 11 guys in the league like 22:15 They're all the guy who won the guy who won is the judge and the jury is all the other guys. Yeah. And then the prosecuting attorney is the second place. The whole thing is just a giant fantasy football league. 22:32 crazy called the court house. The league name the league name. That's pretty hard. That goes pretty hard actually and then so they're sitting there. They're holding court and the loser has to watch a lady give birth. So they had to create this whole job. This crazy call a random mom and tell her that the DNA results say zero percent. Honestly, this makes as much sense as someone trying to scam welfare by having three. This is just as likely. 23:04 That's crazy. dude, fantasy football punishments are absurd. They're getting nuts. They're getting. Did we joke about that on the podcast before? I don't know. We talked about that. I don't know about how I've seen some ones that were great. Like they seem like, this is a good time. 23:20 the Waffle House one. I'm talking about that's a waffle house and then you can share our off, but yeah, yeah, that's a good time. I love that and then everybody in the league can come at different times during the day and mess with you and watch you suffer like that's fun, but there's other ones that are not fun. Yeah, the there was a guy that we met in San Francisco who told me that he wants his fancy full of Lake Parnes meant to be a stolen Valor Day where for a full day you have to 23:50 steal and it has to be convincing enough that people will go. Thank you for your service, but also just wrong enough that any serviceman can go yeah, but you can't break. You can't break. If someone says thank you for service, you have to go. You're welcome. That's really funny. That is a really funny. Oh no, this is my fantasy football punishment. It's stolen Valor day 24:19 That sounds like that sounds like the like the Wednesday of spirit week stolen. All right guys this week I know it's a lot going on. There's a big sale. There's a catering lunch um Tuesday's pajama day. 24:38 Thursday is Jennifer's dead in the parking lot. They Wednesday is stolen Valor Day. So I brought to us by student council. Yeah, idea creative idea. Yeah, well, we only went with it because that kid said he was a purple heart. So felt weird to say no to him. Weird to say no, you know, are you 25:01 hold on. I think I'm just now realizing that he's not a purple heart, purple heart. He just crashed in that accident last month and he said he's a purple. Okay, so anyway, that's okay. So that's the whole thing sounds so stupid. So did a lawyer take the case? Yeah, so she ends up finding a lawyer named Alan Tindal who says, yeah, I want it. I'll keep looking. Don't worry. 25:30 Oh yeah, I want in. Wow. This case is so worth it. 25:39 this case is my Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, so worth it. If you don't listen to our show, some of these quotes are crazy about that, so he starts digging into how this could be possible. How could it be possible that she's coming up as a zero percent match when she clearly gave child gave gave a gave gave child of the birth? 26:03 Yeah, that's a hundred percent what I'm calling giving words from now on gave child to the world child. So he starts digging and he ends up coming across this woman named Karen Keegan, which I should have got you a picture of her. Hold on, give me a second. Let me get a picture of her. Okay, why don't you? While we do this, we said we were going to talk about 26:21 Subway in this episode. Perfect. Okay. So the reason that subway sucks now is the fact that Cisco and US foods have monopolized the food distribution system. So everywhere you go is the same food cooked just slightly different, right? So the mozzarella sticks that they serve at Chili's are the same mozzarella sticks. They serve a TGI Fridays, the chicken strips that you're ordering it at different places is the same chicken strips, right? And so they've made it so hard for restaurants to 26:49 uh source their food from local farmers or local produce or You are even like the distribution of like the people who make chicken because these giant monopolies in the food distribution system have Monopolized and become these gigantic things. They are only buying from certain suppliers Which means that the small chicken farmer, you know quote-unquote a smaller chicken farmer or a processing plant ends up going out of business because all the all the 27:19 the US foods and Cisco are buying from Tyson or buying from, you know, so it creates a system where competition can't exist, which is the whole purpose of capitalism. And if you believe in capitalism, you want it to be able to have different competing products that can compete for fair prices. But what ends up happening is these large conglomerate companies start taking over and then they control the price markets everywhere down. So that's why all their food in these fancy restaurants, fancy, because when I was growing up, Red Lobster was fancy, ah but that all the food in these restaurants and everywhere else, 27:49 One, tastes the same. Two, is worse now than it used to be. And is more expensive than it used to be. Yeah. Yeah, because that is that- Because they control all the levers. That's the one, like, guarantee of the stage of capitalism we're in, where everything will just continue to get worse and cost more. It's awesome. So, like, it's, for real, if you ever go to, like, what was that place, Oh Charlie's or whatever, and you're like, man, these chicken strips taste a lot like 54th Street. They are. 28:17 It's the same chicken strips. Yeah, the only thing that might be different is that the cook might have put them in a little bit longer. Yeah, or season them a little different and that's that's the only different sauce. Yeah, even the sauces. The sauces are all the same, but you might have a different flavor of sauce. Maybe a little bit different of a honey mustard. Wow, unless you go to pick them is because legally they're not allowed to use the same mayonnaise, but that's like 28:43 Dude, okay, so when looking at Subway, right? Because that's where I have the most knowledge from, is that they expanded so far so fast. They were trying to outnumber McDonald's. It was a weird, know, Fred DeLuca turned into a crazy person and was like, we gotta put more Subways. That's why they ended up with two street stores and a Walmart store in the same small town, right? Didn't make any sense. Yeah. But they just wanted as many stores as they could. But when you expand that fast, you have to then get a distributor who can handle that kind of thing. 29:11 And so what they did, like all their products, like we used to, I don't know which ones they still cut right now, but ah you know, all the produce there, used to, the only thing that we didn't know is our lettuce came in a bag. But everything else we cut there. We cut the tomatoes, we cut the onions, we cut the peppers, and you know. so the meats and the sauces and everything came from the same place that the other sandwiches, 29:41 The other sandwich stores got their stuff from as well. And it just, because you're trying to do it on a mass scale, you end up having to do it on a cheaper scale. Yeah. Which then makes the product worse. Yeah. Yeah. And you have to go to the same place that, the one place that offers But it also makes it that the small guy can't get in at a competitive price. When you go to a local sandwich shop and it's like, oh, it's double the price of Subway. Yeah. It's because same thing with like my, so, you know, if you're building a new house, the... 30:10 larger construction company can buy trusses for way cheaper because they buy a thousand of them. They're buying a thousand trusses. Yep. And then you get a bulk discount. But then if you're trying to build your own house on your own property, it's going to cost six times as much because you don't have that bulk discount. You don't need a thousand trusses. Yeah. You just need 999 trusses. So they made it so that you can't build your own home. 30:38 Yeah, you have to use that construction company. Otherwise you're paying six times the price. Yep. Anyway, that's our weekly crash out. Thanks for joining us right here, but that's what I was. I was really upset about it. Really? They think the last episode that stemmed from talking about how in the sweets like we have paid before like for an experience of like, oh, I've never done like a suite at an NFL game. That's crazy money. But even then, like you pay crazy money for some of these things and the quality is not 31:08 Good. Yeah. Like it's like, this is just chicken strips. Oh, like of the food that they have there. That's crazy. Really? When, and this was a long time ago, but, and, I didn't do it. My dad did it while I was in college, but he, someone at the church gave him tickets to the Colorado Rockies and it was like the top of the line ticket that they had. It wasn't a suite, but it was like, you had this separate entrance. There was like a presidential like diner or something like that. 31:36 and they had like special food that was all free and then they just you sat right behind home plate and they like had waiters that came out and he said the food was incredible and so what year was a while ago this was when we were in college so maybe it was different. I think I think honestly in the last ten years is when stuff started to really interesting huh anyway yeah yeah I mean I thought that when we were in Orlando like I don't think any of that food there was incredible at the Ritz like I don't think it was 32:05 crazy like it was good, but it wasn't better. It wasn't like oh, this is it wasn't what that numbed the price on those tickets. Oh for sure it was not that much better yeah, but that stuff's inflated anyway. I mean you know yeah anyway, but that was my that was my rant. Did you find a picture of Karen yeah? So here's Karen Keegan and her family ah and so this is a case. Can you guess which one's care? This is Karen and her three sons ah 32:35 This photo is probably late eighties, I would guess. OK, maybe early nineties. I don't know. m But Alan finds this case in Boston, a woman named Karen Keegan, who her liver was failing. And so she needed a transplant. And so she gets a DNA test and her two adult sons and her husband tested to see who she could um have be a donor for a new liver or not a kidney. Sorry, kidney. 33:04 um not a liver, a kidney. um What was strange in that test, her husband ended up being a positive match, so she was able to get a kidney from her husband. But what was strange was in that test, both of her sons came back as a 0 % DNA match to her. And the doctor was like, that's really weird. And so the doctor came and was like, hey, your kids are your husband's kids, but not yours. And she was like, that's strange because they're mine. 33:34 And she's like and the doctor was like, yeah, I believe you and she's like, that's really weird. She says, look, we're to work out this kidney thing for you and make sure you're healthy. And she's like, but you might if I dig around a little bit, find out what's going on with your DNA. And she's like, yeah, and that is not the way the doctor brought that to her. That's the way I was like, you might know, dig around a little bit. The doctor was like, I a question. You mind if I just like poke and prod and just kind of figure out what's going on with the care if I can to look into this? 34:04 the doctor was like. Would you mind if I did some medical research with you? Would you consent to some medical research? And so she was like sure as long as the same thing when you do improv. If you're going to touch anyone in the audience, you have to give verbal consent. 34:19 when you do improv, you gotta go. Can I you're like oh this per can I touch any verbal consent? Yes, it's the same thing when you're watching an ASMR haircut and the ASMR barber is like. Do you consent to me touching your hair before the haircut because every barber does that and you're like yeah and they the ASMR bar was wearing a hot dog costume. 34:40 drives me insane. If you're an as of artist out there, stop doing that. No barber asks that question. Every barber just assumes you're here. You're sitting in the chair. You're okay with me touching your hair. You care if I touch her. They don't even say you do care if I touch her. They say real quick before we can do consent to me touching your hair drives me crazy drives me insane. Yeah, I guess that didn't come up on my feet because ah 35:08 I as I don't watch that stuff on the internet. I don't watch it either. I just listen to it while I work. I actually I actually put it on my phone, put it in my ears, put on noise cancellation, so it's the best effect and then I turn my phone face down so I can't see it because it makes me uncomfortable to see it, but it helps me focus to hear it. 35:31 What are you doing? What are you doing right now? You're playing Blockbuster. It's not called Blockbuster. 35:42 I don't know you just want to talk about. don't want to talk about here. I don't want to think about it wasn't a bit. I was talking about it. Yes, I'm are okay. Anyways, so here's about this core. This case about Karen Keegan. 36:02 Sorry, is that blockbusting? You got some good blockbusts. m 36:08 So here's what the case about Karen Keegan. The doctor is like, can we research on you and she's like yeah, as long as I survive, like do whatever you want. She's like, if you can do anything short of killing me, no, she's like, if you save my life, you can do whatever you want. That's fair. That's fair. It's fair. And so she gets her kidney transplant. Her husband gives her a kidney and she continues the research and 36:34 They do all these DNA tests. constantly swapping her in. It's constantly coming back. Every test is coming back that she's a 0 % match with her children. They end up getting her third child, where her third child didn't qualify to do the kidney transplant because now they're doing this research. It's like, OK, yeah, we can test him for that. We're not going to take his kidney. But we're going to see if he matches you. He also doesn't match. And so this is very strange. So doctor's pointing through all these research documents trying to figure out what's going on. And she finds out about this case about a child in Texas. 37:02 ah And there is a doctor there who wrote a whole report about this case in Texas where this child was born with two complete sets of DNA. uh So much so that the child had a seam right down uh the center line of their body with two different skin tones. And we actually have a picture of this where there is a legitimate seam where the skin is different. uh And those were two completely different sets of DNA. 37:32 on each half of the child's body. And what this paper concluded was that this was a situation where that child, when the egg was fertilized and in that early stage, and there was the two zygotes, they merged and they fused and they grew as two complete separate sets of human DNA, but merged together. So kind of like a Siamese twin, but without the twin part. 38:01 And so was essentially twins that were stuck together. And so they went down that route to try to prove, is it possible that even though, what did I say her name was? Karen? Karen Keegan? Even though Karen didn't have like any evidence on the outside, like that child in Texas did, could it be possible that she is a similar situation where she is a fused twin that fused in the room and has two sets of DNA? Okay. 38:30 They spent months and months and months swabbing for DNA, finding DNA from different parts of her body until eventually they found, okay, she does. They ended up finding on her thyroid that almost 100 % of her thyroid was a completely different set of DNA. And upon digging deeper, what they were able to discover is that her entire body was peppered with two sets of DNA. But the frequency of what DNA was showing up in each cells was... 39:00 predominantly the set that came out in those first tests. Okay. The thyroid was the one place where it was predominantly the other set of DNA. And when they compared that DNA to her children, it was a hundred percent match that she was the mother. 39:16 Hey, if you love the show, a great way to serve support is by getting some merch. We got lots of great stuff. I'm going to showcase some of it right now. This is like our little tilling QVC. You can get a it's not a call. It's a podcast sweatshirt. Very sweet. The nice thing about this is no one knows what podcast you're talking about. So you wear it in public and you can tell them about your Lord and Savior to a podcast. We also got the this is one of my favorite things we've ever made. The fiddle off fest hoodie. It's got uh the devil. 39:45 playing a fiddle. It's not really the devil's a skeleton. And then all of the bands on the back of it like it's a festival. But spoiler alert, these aren't bands. These are jokes from episodes. So worth checking out. And this is one of my favorite things we've ever done. This is for the real fans. This is an old one. We've got a Tim Stones get well quick trick shirt. And it's very cool. We've got some really good designs. Darren is good at designing stuff. So support his dream. No one will hire him as a designer, but you can by buying his merch. 40:14 It's our merch, but it's his designs. so leave a comment, say, Jared, you're good at this. um We like your art. He really needs it. He needs your support so bad. Please make him feel better about it and buy some merch. It helps make this show keep happening. You can tell people about how much you love this show with it. So. 40:37 Did you hear it? Did you hear what I said? Yeah, you're going to do a two minute merch ad. wasn't a two minute merch ad. Oh, Jaren's a good designer. Go give him a high five. He can feel good about his art. 40:51 and then you're going to make them listen to two minutes of ads. We got to do all that and then it's going to be like back to school this fall like 41:02 I don't want to be. Well, hey, there's skippable ads. They're not skip. They are skippable. You got YouTube premium leave all this in that uh 41:16 And so what they concluded was that the DNA that was showing up predominantly in every other cell was the DNA of a twin that she had in the womb that merged. And in her case, it was in a situation where there was that thin line right down the middle on that split. was just completely like merged and there was little bits in every cell of DNA. Oh that's my twins thyroid and that's my twins, three kids. 41:45 And sometimes I have thoughts that are the twins. 41:51 Sometimes I think about my twins thoughts. Sometimes my twin has thoughts. 42:06 before. Sorry. And so as a part of that journey to get to that point before they got before they found the actual DNA in Karen, they tested extended family from Karen's family tree to see if there is any DNA that match. And they found that her children matched her mother. And so for them to match her mother, it had to either be they are Karen's child or one of Karen's siblings child. Karen only had a brother. And so they said it's probably not the case that 42:35 Karen's husband and brother had this these children probably the case that there's something strange going on with Karen's DNA. And so when Alan found this case he got all those documents together and he basically went to the court and requested that Lydia's extended family be tested to see if they were sure to the family line uh as well as they went to see if they could find some other set of tissue within Lydia that matched her children. 43:06 Um, and so they did all those tests with Lydia. They did all the tests with the extended family members. Uh, but the timing of it with where her court date was, they were not able to find out before the court date, uh, the results of her DNA tests. So she went into that court, court date, the genuinely not having an idea about what was going on. Um, and because she, her tests had not come back to her yet. Alan shows up to court, her, her lawyer, um, luckily. 43:35 with the data from the extended families DNA. Okay. And what those tests proved was that uh her mother was the grandmother of the children. And so that ended up being enough to prove to the courts that the children were Lydia's children, because that was, there was no sibling on record. uh It didn't end up coming out until weeks later when she got the results of the test that they did find a second set of DNA within Lydia. And so she was also had the same 44:04 She had the same thing. She had the same thing where she was probably merged with a twin. And the technical term for this is ah chimerism, which is named after the Greek creature, the chimera. Oh. ah Which this is like a Greek mythological creature, which is like a lion and a goat and a snake fused together. I mean, there's lots of iterations of this. This is the most common version in Greek mythology where two creatures have like their... 44:32 they didn't know that DNA, but yeah, where for those listening, it's a lion statue and then it's just got a goat head sticking out. It's literally side like its shoulder right out of its ribs. There's a goat head and then its tail is a snake is a snake. Yeah, like it has a normal tail and then the tip of the tail is the snake head. Yeah, yeah, pretty cool um and so they named this this condition after that it's a kind 44:58 chimerism. Okay, there is a actress who's got the same thing where she's got the line. This one just looks like a sunburn to me, but it is. She has two sets of DNA and says her and who is the actress looking at her. You don't know her. She's not famous. Oh, uh but she, she has the majority of her credits are going on things like the today show to talk about her chimerism and how it's difficult for her and person with 45:27 career. I guess I guess um what's interesting is this is still very new like we obviously like we couldn't find out that this was even possible until we could test DNA and it wasn't even possible. She did play uh Harvey Dent and the Batman movie, though no makeup needed. 45:47 to face. What's interesting is this. This is a very, very new field of study like we don't know a lot about it. There are two ways it happens and there's there's let me get the let me pull this up so I can get the technical. should do a whole episode on Siamese twins. Those things freak me out. There are that's not how I meant to say that I was trying to be in their people. 46:12 there are people and they freak me out. That's not how I meant to say that I meant to say it a different way. It came out very poorly. No, we should do an episode on the time. These twins because or like at least a couple of them, because like I just want to know the social lives of them like they some of them get married. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah and it's just like 46:41 You're made of honors right there. Yeah. Yeah. 46:45 that's uncomfortable. I'm now thinking about it too. Most of the Siamese twins that I've seen stories of my entire life are all female. They're always on TLC. Yes, but I are there male Siamese twins is Siamese twins. What we're supposed to call them. It feels like that's not what I call them right. I joined feels. I think conjoined is the word yeah. I think conjoined is what we're supposed to call them. I think you're right there are 47:13 I'm looking at a bunch of them on Google right now. 47:25 I'm looking at a bunch of them right now. 47:33 Yeah, there's dudes. I'm looking at a lot of them right now. 47:39 You 47:50 Oh my God, yeah, I'm looking at a lot of them right now. All right, where are they all joined it because they're joint like I joined at different spots. Yeah, because that's just how it happens. Yeah, yeah, that's so crazy. Yeah, and so essentially chimera ism is the same concept. What's the success rate of D joining conjoined twins? Well, I'm I probably not very much 48:18 because my understanding is like a lot of times they're sharing like their central organs right and so it's like they have like their nervous systems are separate, but their main organs are together. This is what I'm saying. We should do a long breakdown of how this stuff works because I'm very interested. It's interesting because this chimer ism is essentially uh the same conjoined twins thing, but it's happening much early in the pregnant much earlier in the pregnancy. Yeah to where when the child is born you you 48:47 usually can't tell is what they're finding. Like the tetragametic, think is tetra tetragametic or tetragemetic. I'm not sure exactly the pronunciation of that is where it's fusing. And there is a there is a word for it when they're when they get the split, where it's where it's a clear cut between the two. And I can't find the word for that. But there's a word for it where there's the two. So it's essentially 49:16 Two versions is there's a there's a clear cut between you where it's like this half is your twin. The other half is the other and it could be a split. It could be a side by side. There are cases too where it's like you can see this part of you is them. This part of you is them. This part of you is them. That's crazy. Yeah, it's nuts. I don't like saying them and then there's still you then then then there's the other situation where it's like Karen or Lydia where 49:45 You can't tell at all from outward appearances. It's just looking at a cellular level at your DNA. Yeah, look at the cells. There are portions of each cell that are one set of DNA and portions that are the other set of DNA and they're just mixed together like salt and pepper, eh which is crazy, crazy. ah What is really interesting about this research though is they are discovering well, I shouldn't say they're scaring. There is very early signs that 50:13 They believe that one in eight, as much as one in eight of people are this situation, which calls into question DNA test is a whole. Yeah. One in eight? Yeah. Because they know that there are a lot of situations where early in pregnancies, there are two embryos that, and it ends up one fails. And so they're starting to wonder how many of those are fusing in that early stage. And so we don't know for sure yet. 50:41 but there are these early estimates say that there could be as many as one in eight people are this situation, which does really like you never know now, like if that's true, it means one and eight of DNA tests could be wrong because that person's DNA is that calling a question DNA evidence then for crimes a hundred percent because you wouldn't know well because that would still match you though in theory because with the situation of Karen 51:11 if you took DNA from her thyroid and you took DNA from somewhere on her arm, those are going to two different sets of DNA. Yeah, but that would only help you get out of the crime. Well, they're not gonna that wouldn't be like a DNA match to pin you for a crime. Yeah, yeah, that's true. That's right. They can't pay, but yeah, you could get out of it. So would be pretty cool, but it did. It did get me thinking. 51:38 You guys are trying to get a DNA sample from me uh for a crime. Can you pull it from my thyroid? Can I choose how? Can I choose what DNA you take? Let me choose the DNA you get. Let me choose. No, let me choose. Let me choose. No, let me choose. Let me do it. Sorry, that is them talking. What? 52:06 I know I sorry my Twitter English twin thoughts the twin doesn't speak English the twin speaks his own they don't speak English. They made up their own language shut up about the see my night. The police like yeah I think they come into the crime. We don't need to do the DNA. That's the 52:36 criminal right there. That's a dog. all right. You're going to jail. I don't know for what, but we're going to put you away for something. You're gonna jail half of me. 52:51 that's also a conjoined twins. Yeah, I mean you were there yeah, but are you responsible? What's the whole time? No, he did it want to do this. He did it. I don't want to do this. I'm turning you in for this. He calls the cops. Hey, so this is going to be awkward. Hey Janus. Yeah, I know it's me again. Here's the thing. It's not me this time. I know 53:20 I mean I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I'm I'm powerless to stop it to be honest, but it was them. Can you imagine being with me? Yeah, yeah, we were robbed. He was super super kind, really generous, like really nice cut. It came into the conjoined twin was he was a co-joined twin. Only one of them was wearing a basket. Hey, put that away, put that away. 53:44 the twin, the toy is like chill like cop, bad cop situation. Wow, I don't know how insensitive this whole stuff is and I'll be honest. I don't really care. That's crazy. Anyways, so it got me thinking and I don't know if I should put this out on the internet for any would be criminals out there, but crisper is becoming a thing and what is crisper? Are you familiar? 54:13 the mattress company, not even close, not even close. Crisper is this company that is and it's an air fryer, not even close, kind of close. No, because there's a company that's doing the DNA modification and it's crazy. Do you not know about cation? Do you not know about crisper? Is this a thing where like you can choose the sex of your baby before way crazier? Okay, uh crisper. It looks like it honestly. I'm trying to think of how to describe it. Like it looks like kind of a crazy looking syringe. 54:43 and you can modify DNA from a living person and change their DNA um and like right now what they're capable of doing is very, very, very small modifications. Like what kind of modifications we talking about like they can come into your DNA and change like one line of your DNA code. Yeah, but for what end right now what they're researching it. So here's the thing CRISPR is not available to the public. There's a black market overseas that's doing CRISPR 55:12 um just for whatever reason, and they're doing some crazy stuff where they're like changing like actual physical appearance things with DNA. The okay in medicine though, what they're they're looking for genetic diseases and they're selecting out genetic diseases, but they're doing it and people who are already alive, they're just coming in, finding that genetic mutation and changing it uh with CRISPR technology. And it looks like a crazy syringe that that's what they're using for it for it is wild technology and 55:43 we're probably a decade away from it being like mass use, but like the research we're past the early research stage. Like we're kind of in the like get approved to use it on anybody stage. Okay, but we are. We're at the point now where the science is there. It's like yeah, this works. We can do this and now it's like, can we get the government to let us do this? And there's like what are, what are DNA altering diseases that any genetic disease? Okay. And so like Alzheimer's oh 56:13 Is that genetic? I don't know if it's isn't it is that genetic? I genuinely don't know. I don't know what I didn't. don't know what gen what diseases are genetic. That's I'm asking. You're the one that has a Google machine in front of you. Here's a list of genetic diseases from Google, certain types of cancer, Alzheimer's being a Red Sox fan, Huntington's Marfan syndrome, kidney disease, cystic fibrosis, sickle cell anemia, 56:43 I this show more is not showing more, so that's all I got for you right now. Okay, but yeah, anything that's genetic, they can come in and select for that and and just remove it and you can while you're alive. But what's crazy is now the legal route that is happening in the actual medical community today is not doing like cosmetic stuff. The black market and overseas is doing cosmetic changes. They're changing eye colors or changing hair colors. 57:11 they're changing like while you're alive, you can change it yes how because because with this your cells are regenerating yes and so with this technology they come in and they literally will take that part of your genetic code and swap it with a different part of genetic code and it changes you and it's not like, but your cells have to die. They replaced and it's it's insane. I don't know about that since they what and that's the medical researchers are coming out and they're saying this is possible. They're like that's not what our here's what I think, but this is possible. Here's my take on that. I think 57:42 if I had the right coaches, the right nutrition, the right practice schedule and access to the CRISPR DNA changing, altering science. I'm not saying you could be as good or a starter. Even I'm saying I can make the league 58:02 I mean, yeah, if you could get CRISPR modification, yeah, you could for sure. No questions asked. But yeah, there's a lot of, the medical researchers are working really hard to get this approved and they're coming against like a lot of political pushback because of particularly in the religious community, they feel like it's like playing God. But there's people outside the religious community that are kind of. 58:25 being like, well, this is kind of like opening a Pandora's box because if you can modify anything, especially when you're alive, what happens, especially when you give that, if it's a medical thing that is a treatment, like of course it's going to go to the rich and the rich are going to use it and they're going to get ahead and there's going to widen the gap. So there's a lot of like, is incredible technology that could change a lot of lives and save a lot of lives and make a lot of people live better, healthier experiences. And there's the aspect of that that's amazing. And we should do that. 58:55 there's another aspect that is it's risky, ah but it's here and whether or not it happens is. mean it's one those things where it's like the rich have access to it anyway. If you're rich enough, you have access to it. You go overseas and do the black market thing for sure, because yeah, there's a huge black market market for it. Yeah, it's been around for a while. It's crazy. Maybe I should cover it. Well, I kind of covered all all. Maybe I haven't. I could look into it more. That's all I just joined twins episode. Okay, so anyways, 59:25 uh What I was saying was if you could get your hands on a CRISPR device, because they're black market devices anyways, you could modify your DNA. You could go commit a crime, modify your DNA, and then you're good. It wasn't me. Do the test. don't put that out there. 59:44 either. Yeah, so that there's another issue with CRISPR. It's crazy technology, but anyways, that's the story of Lydia Fair, Lydia Fairchild and how she came this close to losing her kids. If it wasn't for her finding this lawyer who was really interested in the case of doing a lot of work and honestly for Karen going like there's just there was just so many dominoes that were like so lucky honestly, because Karen like had she not had kidney failure and had a doctor 01:00:12 who saw that and was like I want to know more about that. Like if the doctor was just like that weird and then just did the procedure and just let it sit like there's so many things that had to fall in line for Lydia to be able to keep her kids and she was able to because of it. Wow and they're like a little bit younger than us her kids. Yeah. I mean her youngest kid was born in two thousand two. So yeah, the oldest kid older kids are probably only a couple years younger than us. So got to grow up with her mother because of happy for you guys. Yeah, if you're watching 01:00:43 I hope we didn't say what's crazy about your Lydia listens to the podcast, but only half of her likes it. I like this show. I love this show. Listen, listen to the funny guys. Oh, I love listen to this podcast. I'm so mad. You're listening to this right now. I hate this podcast so much fiddle off 01:01:11 Hey, thanks for checking out this episode. If you liked this one, you might like John R. Brinkley. It's another episode where there's a doctor who's doing some weird stuff. It's really worth the watch. And if you want to see next week's episode, you can see that right now over on Patreon. Our patrons get a lot of bonus perks, including seeing every episode a week early ad free. But we'll see you next week on another episode of Things I Learned Last Night.


When Lydia Fairchild applied for child support in 2002, she thought it was a routine process. She was a young mother of two, pregnant with her third child, and wanted to ensure help from her children’s father. But what began as paperwork turned into one of the strangest legal and scientific mysteries in modern history—the case of Lydia Fairchild and … Read More

Lived in Toys R Us for a Year | The Roofmam

10-28-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of roof man? 00:05 roof man, roof man. That's really funny that I was just talking about the text. know it really is really funny. My landlord was like hey on Saturday, October 11th, they're going to do some preventative roof maiden. And so if you see a guy up there, don't worry and then immediately text sorry wrong day and then text wrong roof. Hey guys on Monday, October 13th, he just sent the same text and just fixed the 00:28 thing. Are you trying to start the timer right now? Yeah, I just just bowed through just ignore me. No, I don't worry about me dude. I was just talking. I'm listening. I was just saying stuff. Oh hey, still talking over here. 00:43 It's easy. It's... suck. And people are like, Jaren, you seem pretty sad about stuff lately. Yeah, I think about it. I go, why look around sometimes. Oh, that's really bad. Oh, that's really bad. That's really bad. Things I learned last night. 01:13 All right, so the roof, the roof man. Yeah, this is the roof man. uh Oh, I've showed you. This is a mug shot right away. Okay, yeah, this is the this is a for audio listener. This is a mug shot. It's a plain white guy whose hairline looks like Tim's pretty far up there and but we got a comment the other day. Shush. Hold on. I'm still describing this doesn't look like he has a mustache. It looks like he drank chocolate milk poorly like it's like it's like 01:43 that it's like very thin right at his lip and then like the whole Kogan go to not go to but the mustache handlebar things, but it doesn't look the hair is not thick enough for him to do this. You know yeah all right now say what you were going to say. I was finishing up for my wife. Here's the thing I make her listen to these when we go to anywhere when we drive. I go what we should quality control an episode and so we listen to it and then she goes she'll go 02:10 he's showing another picture right before I even go yeah. So in this picture, this is what this is. She'll get mad and then I go give it a second. I'm gonna I'm gonna explain it. I got to look at it before I can describe it. We got to comment the other day. We got to comment. It says why is Tim's hairline pulled back six or seven inches? I don't know. Me neither. I don't know the answer to that. I've been asking that every day. Stop telling me you're haircut this week. 02:37 It looks pretty fresh. I didn't get a hair guy yesterday for audio listeners. uh I'm sorry about your hairline man. I walked in my the my location, my barber shop. It has two stories and the basement is like the other story that's and so they've got like three more chairs down in the basement, but they have a camera down there with a feed with a big TV screen at the top of the stairs and I 03:05 I think the reason is so like the front desk knows what's going on down there um like knows like if they're ready for you, you know, as well, because like there's a waiting down there. There's like waiting up front and so like I don't know, but also it's probably just to be like hey, like if you're down there one on one with a barber, we can see you. Maybe that's the idea. I don't know. Okay, I don't know. I don't know what you think. It's like a Walmart situation where they're like you're on camera. I don't think it's like that. I don't know. Maybe I'm right anyways. I walked in and my barber wasn't at 03:33 her chair. She was in the basement with a couple of that's probably why your hair's messed up. I'm not trying to be 03:41 I don't want kid. I want if I go to my barber, he cuts my hair. You know, I'm not listen. We're not getting into all the stuff. I'm just saying there's okay. I go in and my barber, she's down there with a couple other barbers and she's in a hot dog costume, just dancing in the basement and the the person at the front desk is like. I got you checked in. She'll be up in a minute and you're gonna look at the TV. Yeah, 04:10 and she's just down there dancing in a hot dog costume and then she comes upstairs with the hot dog costume with the costume and then you got to be like wow. Okay, so I know you were doing something really important on there. No, literally I'm not kidding. We sat down. She, you know, button me up, did the whole thing, turned me around. She's like we did the same thing as usual and I was like I saw you in that hot dog. See my barber when I sit down, he doesn't even do a cape. He makes me put on a hot dog costume 04:40 I can't cut you with what does look like is like as big as my head is. I also have a very large neck yeah and so oh the capes don't fit yeah. I feel like I'm gonna suffocate like but like I'm not choking enough like it's not like oh it's just on come. know when it's just tight enough that you're like I can't complain about this, but also like but also I don't like speaking to my large head. I did a show in Phoenix this week. I meant to bring it with me and 05:07 we can show a picture. I'll send a picture of this of me with the hat on uh a couple came to the show and she crocheted me a hat, which was very nice, and then she told me that it wasn't that she made this hat for me. She made this hat for her husband and when he put it on, it was way too big for his head and they were like oh no. Who do we know with she she goes? Oh, I know someone with a large head, so that's 05:36 That's not as nice as if you made me a hat. You don't talk about like that's not the same like you were like that's not like. Oh, let me let me have jared while I crochet this hat. It's just this is your husband's hand me ups. You know I'm about me. uh 05:56 speaking to every else. Do we we talked about when I said you hear me down like two months ago? We talk about that. I got a package in the mail and I was like I'm not expecting anything and it says from Tim and I was like oh maybe I'm thinking maybe someone sent us some promo something and he's sending me my half. No, it was just a box of hey man found these old clothes thought you might want them and they're just Tim's medium t shirts. 06:22 There was neither of us could wear anymore. By the way, was a pair of my skinny jeans. 06:31 and I was like all right, so funny. I think my wife kept the vans shirt. It's a cool shirt. It's a cool shirt. Yeah, I wish it fit. I'd still wear it hand me ups is so funny. Anyways, so the roof man. Oh, okay, I almost forgot. Okay, can you space these? Can you do that like later? Yeah, we can. We sure write it down. I don't go ahead and say what you forgot. It's our eighth birthday. Oh, that's right. We can do that now. 06:59 we've been doing this podcast for eight years. Holy cow, eight years for eight views. That's wonderful. Thank you. Thank you to all of you for being here. Also a quick shout out to Tyler Cox in in Omaha. Yeah, he booked me for a corporate gig and he he told me that he wanted a shout out in the episode and so that's not his name. I said a different one, but he knows I'm talking about. knows it's him. 07:27 isn't that funny? I'm pretty sure that's his name. Well, what if it wasn't? What if I was just like a shout out to Jason? That's really funny when people ask for a shout out be like, be like yeah, but I'm going to call you. I you'll know it's about you, but I'll make it a different name. No, just literally anybody be like, be like yeah, I'll shut you out, but I'm going to call you Tyler Cox. Yeah, so in every episode you're shouting out a shout out Tyler Cox. Tyler knitted me a hat 08:00 Okay, so the roof man didn't fit her husband, so the roof man. Here's another picture of them okay, uh rooftop suspect Jeffrey Allen Manchester. Yeah, this is the roof man. uh He was active uh in the late nineties active just okay. I guess we'll get to it, but right now it's just he's just on the roof. So this is a guy die. We'll dive right in. Here's here's what he did. He he targeted 08:30 mostly McDonald's, but some other establishments. uh It was like, bet I can get on that roof. Kind of. So what he would do is he would in the middle of the night, not in the middle of night, uh late into the evening, near closing time, climb onto the roof of McDonald's and he would bore a hole through the roof of McDonald's and get to the point where it's like, okay, I'm about through this roof and he would wait for closing time. And so they would lock up the doors and he would 08:59 bust through the roof and drop down into the McDonald's with all the employees in there and armed robbery them. uh 09:13 So what okay, so he'd land from the roof and he'd be like this is a stick up and he'd have the gun and everything. He'd fire a few shots into the wall or something. So they know he means business. Yeah, but then like his attitude shifted like he's he's a masked man fell from the ceiling, shot a couple shots in the wall yelling at them and then like he just like calm down and was like here's here's a really weird thing about him. Everybody all the officers, all the witnesses, anybody who's ever involved in one of these heists was always like he was very like 09:43 cordial and like super so he jumped to the building. It's a robbery. All right guys, so basically what I would like to do is just take some of the money and I don't want to take it all. You guys could share with me actually yeah, but I'm sorry about the hole in the roof. It's kind of like my thing. uh If people ask, just call me the roof man. He literally like I'm the roof man. 10:09 what's your name? Everybody go around the circle and introduce yourself, say of three fat employees not hear him boring through the roof earlier, like just like they're they're they're not even flipping burgers. Don't they do it like doesn't the the burger, the burger does it or slide thing or whatever they do. They're there doing the fries and stuff and then like you just hear 10:32 I don't see the ceiling. The ceiling sounds weird today. I don't know how weird you know what it is though. They all just sit there. They go. We're not paid enough to deal with that. don't care who whatever yeah and so so he just he genuinely he would introduce himself as the roof man and he would ask everybody and introduce themselves and he would start to them by not yeah. He would call them by name and so he'd be like who's the manager here. Thank you Jordan. I appreciate that very much. Which one of you's in charge? You know what? 11:01 think I hit this McDonald's a couple months ago and you were just a shift lead. Now you're one of them. I am so proud of you. 11:11 Wow and so he would ask who was ever in charge. He back. Okay, I need to see the receipts for the day. He's like I want to make sure you're giving me everything that you have and so he would cross reference the receipts. What they would give up. uh Sorry we're missing like fifteen minutes of receipts here. 11:34 and they're like yeah, sorry, sorry, there's some that's okay, that's okay. Hey, you know what? That's fine. You know it's a high ten situation. I just came to the roof. I get it. I get it. I get it. You know, adrenaline. Not every day a guy falls through your roof. Yeah, he's got his readers on with the mask. He's still wearing the mask. He puts the readers over the ski. 12:00 Yeah. How long is he in the while? It's a long time. It's a long time and so then he he gets all the money he bags. This is a late nineties yeah. This is late. Nobody's calling the police no because no one's in there. He's got a gun. No one's in there except for the employees. He waits until they lock up. Well, I know, but none of the employees are calling the police. No, no, no, they all know him. He introduced himself. Yeah. Well, what he does is hello police. 12:25 there's a very nice man robbing us right now. He's really kind. He calls himself the roof man ah and so he would he then like after he gathered whoever was in charge and got the receipts, he would gather all the employees together and be like you guys. Why don't you grab your jackets and then he'd be like you're going to want to bundle up and then he'd walk them in the first little chili. Oh 12:53 that's how we get them from call the cops. Oh you're in the freezer and he'd say don't worry, you're just going to be in there for like side, know about minutes side note about the freezer is that ah when I worked at subway, you know that like during a tornado we're supposed to get in the refrigerator yeah yeah, because if the building is taken away, those are the last things less standing yeah yeah, so you just be in there being like oh, I hope don't get in the freezer. I hope someone releases us don't get in the free. Did yours not have like a panic release? 13:23 Well, it's if stuff falls in front of it, you're stuck in there. I guess that's true. I guess I don't think about that yeah, because I mean like the electric's probably going to go out if stuff falls there, but like you know, you don't want to take a risk of being stuck in the freezer. That's true. Yeah, yeah, it was impossible at Picklemans for us to get locked in the freezer. I guess unless someone put something in front of the door yeah, like a tornado put something in front of the door like a tornado like you're never going to get out. Excuse me, 13:51 would you guys all get in the freezer? I'm an f five tornado and I would just like you guys to get in the freezer. We're Don't worry for you. It'll be a I'm going to destroy your town. It'll be in there for a while like what? Okay, yeah, I'd say you're only going to be there for thirty minutes or so. Don't worry. The police will come get you out uh and then he would with the manager get all the cash on the receipts and stuff and then he'd take the manager and load the manager in there and then before phones. I mean like cell phones. 14:20 So all the employees are just in the freezer being like this is crazy, right? Yeah, you're just stuck in there and you can't play clash of clans. This ever happened. Yeah, like you guys, you know what I miss is that during hostage situations, you should have to talk to each other. Yes, I'm opening your phone and being like I well being held hostage in McDonald's right now. uh 14:43 you just get that's what they take. That's what they took from us. Yeah, the community, yeah, exactly the community. You know you used to be able to sit there and chat with each other while you're being robbed. Yep, yep, that's exactly right and then so he'd get all the money he'd pack it up in his duffel bags um and then he'd take the manager and into the and then he would go. Can I stay on your shoulders? I go back through the whole and then there's the door 15:11 It's nice. It's the whole. It's a whole thing. It's whole thing. Don't worry about it. It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. Honestly, this is why I do it. This is the best part. The best part is trying to get myself back to a grappling hook that he just and then he Indiana Jones's way out of the McDonald's crazy. No, so he takes the manager back in and then he calls from the store phone. He calls the police and he says, hey, the roof man just robbed this McDonald's at this location. 15:40 all the employees are in the freezer. You're going to want to come get them out and then he said bye and he would hang up and then he would leave. He'd walk out the front door nine one one. What is your emergency Janice Janice? Hey, the roof. It's me the roof man. Oh no, what did you do again? No, no, no, no, no, it's fine. They're all the freezer as usual. Just want to give you a heads up. Yeah, no, no, no, no, they're bundled. Is officer Daniel out on the street today? 16:09 Oh, they just had their kid. That's tell him I said congratulations. I did. I I'll to drop into the hospital later. I'll leave a gift at the next place I stop at. Yeah. Okay. All right. Well, I'll see you later. Yeah, kind of. And he would leave and he would park his car a few blocks away and he would literally just walk over to his car and drive away. And he did this for years. 16:36 he was active for year was seven to two thousand one across the country. He started in California, but he hit cities literally coast to coast yeah, and it was the exact same thing where he would hit a McDonald's usually a McDonald's he he hit like blockbuster. He hit a lot of us to video yeah. He hit Burger King like he they blockbuster. I don't think he did very much because they didn't have a freezer like what are you going to walk them uh yeah, you can't get in the gumball 17:05 But it clapped in the gumball machine 17:10 six six blockbuster boys found jammed into the gumball machine lol being held hostage in the gumball machine right now. 17:21 uh And so he went literally across the country, uh mostly fast food restaurants and blockbuster uh doing this thing where he would climb up in the roof, saw his way through the roof and drop down right on the roof. When he left, mean like he did, he dropped down with all of his tools. So what is interesting is they think that what he would do is he would go and like use his hands. It was, it was a different, they think he was doing it at a different time. Like he would go prep the hole and get it to where it was like 17:51 about to bust and then right before he would come up there with less tools on like the actual date where he was going to do it. So he had prepped it a day or two in advance and then he would come back and then he would just be able to go all right. We're going in and he was just jump. Yeah, he would just freaking goomba stop and then fall right through the floor. 18:13 Yes, okay, and so he had been doing this and like he's probably not landing gracefully either. You know, like he like falter the whole like only lands on his side gets up. It's like is a stick up a pop, pop, pop, pop. 18:33 My name is the roof man. Nice to meet you all. 18:39 This is what you introduce say your name now. Don't be rude. He gets the gun back out. She's the other one. Say your name. 18:53 I'm Tyler Cox. Is that your name or is that somebody in Omaha? They wanted to shout out and now you're doing it. Is that what's happened? Say your name and so he would go from mighty large hat you have 19:09 we go from city to city doing this and it was like and it was the same story every time he was super nice, super kind, very cordial, didn't hurt anyone, didn't hit anyone. It like started out aggressive, but then the whole time you like he was just so kind to everybody in the room and everybody. Everybody remarked like he was genuinely like he seems like a really good guy. Like that's how people a lot of charisma. He just seems like a great guy. Honestly, I mean he did rob us good hang and so McDonald's put out a statement because they had been the primary ones getting hit yeah. 19:39 They literally put out a statement. They said it looks like we got a real hamburger on our hands 19:49 I want to go on record that I hate companies and I've always hated companies. think, I think that honestly though, I mean, I, in the early phase of this great marketing opportunity, McDonald's was losing, honestly, no, with McDonald's business model, corporate wasn't losing a dime off of this. And so corporate, they couldn't care less if their stores were getting robbed. 20:11 I guess and so for them they were like yeah. This is cool. We're all over the news right now. Yeah, they started sending out materials for for trying to get new hires and they had a picture of the whole like the sky's the limit for your career. m 20:26 Here at McDonald's, are breaking down the glass ceiling. 20:35 so uh and ninety nine point nine nine nine nine nine percent of the time this went off without a hitch. There was one time where an employee tried to be a hero and he like threw a bucket at him like a pickle bucket or something and he goes hey. He's like that was really rude. He shoot him. No, he didn't. He generally genuinely he was just like I think he genuinely we threw the bug anyway. Okay, okay, I can understand I changes are high 21:08 I get it. I'm going to forgive that already, but I do want the contents of your wallet. Yeah, you're gonna you're gonna pay to Tyler Cox. 21:23 speaking of tensions being high. Can we talk about the devil wards for a second buddy? Get me on this thing, so this is like a month late when this is going to come out, but this is come out later, but the devil wards were this week. Here's the thing that happened. Okay, Shama wrote the dev awards, yeah, and get paid a month, getting get paid enough Alex Alex. You don't know this story. Do you like the you what the devil words are though? Yeah, 21:50 Dove Awards are Christian Grammys right, so the Christian music industry and Christian Christian Grammys. So they are God Grimace. I mean you know the yeah the God Grammys the anyway, ah so Forest Frank is the largest Christian artist right now. He's got millions of followers on Instagram. They use the he's the biggest guy and he's a very young dude, very young. He's later twenties, early thirties, whatever he is. Yeah, he's going to win 22:19 artist of the year, just like he did last year. Yeah right, and he went last year, got his trophy, did his speech, he said he does offer the glory of God, all that stuff good, cool puts out a video awards are on Tuesday night, puts out a video on Monday where he says hey, you know it's it's kind of tough to know where the line is between being worldly and doing you know the Christian artist thing and I dress like the world and so my music sounds like the world, but one personal conviction of mine personal conviction. 22:49 is I think I can, I can draw the line in the sand and say, I'm not going to accept a trophy or an award for my music. That's from Jesus for Jesus, right? Puts out this video. 23:03 Why did you do that? 23:06 because first of all to win the award, you have to submit to the Dove Awards, which means that your team or you submitted to the Dove Awards to win, which I found out today. He owns his label, so he is his team. So you submitted to the Dove Awards to be like guys. It's just really worldly to get awards. I am going to make millions off this. I'm going to make a ton of money and live on the beach and go surf every day and and also sell one hundred dollar hoodies on my website, but the plastic trophies where I got to draw a line in the sand. 23:34 I just think it's goofy. It is good. It's a lot of the same energy as like if a kid like the most popular kid in fifth grade and it's also like dude. You won the artist of the year. You are the top Christian artist yeah yeah and then for you to turn around and be like it's actually kind of lame that you guys celebrate that stuff and it's like people a dude and I'll tell you who else deserves an award is all of his internet fans because they deserve award for forest frank defenders. All right, maybe if we had given them an award they'll quit doing it good night dude. 24:04 Because that's what they do. listen, if that's your personal conviction, great. Whatever. And I'm also fine making money in the industry. It's a job, it's an industry. I get it. But to make that video, it just is condescending. It feels very intentional because he has to apply for it. So it feels very intentional that it's like, I'm going to apply for it, and then this gives me an opportunity to make some content to be like, oh, I'm better than all of you. I'm so whole. And people are like, oh, but he didn't say that. It's like, well, listen, my personal conviction 24:31 it's the same way of us. If I was to say, I think it's worldly to watch the Super Bowl. If you're a fan of mine, then you would go, uh, should I not watch the Super Bowl? Even though I didn't say that, even though I didn't say, Hey, you shouldn't watch Super Bowl. Me going for me, that's personal invasion. I don't want to do that because I don't want to be like the world. It just casts it where it's like all the other Christian artists are like, um, okay, I guess it's just, it's just lame, you know, 24:59 Yep. Yep. So anyway, I was just mad about it. Yeah. Yeah. I think you should be. It's gross. I don't think we should be. It's fine. It's whatever. They're doing a weird halftime show now. They're like, bad bunnies doing nothing. We got to do a different halftime. You know what? Guys, quit being freaking weird. Yeah. Why are we being so freaking weird, dog? Yeah. Yeah. I agree. I agree. Yeah. 25:24 I have a lot to say about it, but I'm not gonna well. You know what and that's your personal conviction. I just think it's weird. I don't know. I'm uncomfortable with all. I am increasingly uncomfortable with a lot of the stuff that's coming out of a lot of the Christian world and the most influential people in the Christian space. Like are you just seeing people and you go? I think you're more interested in being an influencer than you are hundred percent. know hundred percent 25:49 and it's I get it because it's the same stuff we used to post when we were in Christian College. If I post and I'm just like I don't need to go out on the weekends and drink because I have God and you're just like why did you post that you post? Why did you post our not even post it from a bar, but it's like why do you why what's the motivation behind posting it? The motivation behind posting it is to be like hey guys, I'm actually better than and like and even though it's not explicit and that's where I think that 26:17 I don't think college me knew that that was what I was doing yeah. It made me feel good to go. Oh, I'm not like those people a hundred percent. It makes me feel great to be like you know, and I did that to a cop in college. What'd say to a cop in college? I was, I was driving down Glenstone late one night and it was like one of those checkpoints and he asked for my ID and he was like, he's like, you've been drinking tonight and I literally was like I go to a Vangel. I said, I said no, I'm straight and he was like okay. 26:47 No, I actually follow the Lord and you're like freaking be normal dog. You know, yeah, he booked me. It feels a lot of it and this is obviously bigger than the forest frankly situation thing. It's just so much stuff, especially now feels very performative and the reason that we have to do this. All right, tangent time. The reason that we feel like we have to be performative and the the personal like it's the same kind of 27:15 thing when people who are not in shape talk about how much they work out yeah yeah or it's just like dude. If you were consistent with your diet and working out, you don't have to tell everyone that you're working out all the time. Yeah, they can see it. You know the results are there. Yeah, it's it's whenever there's the insecurity of the. don't want to be seen as a person who is lazy and has no self discipline, so I have to then signal that I'm not is like that's 27:43 you know that's. I think that's where we're at and the reason that we're there is because we're so disconnected from our personal communities. We talked a lot about community on the show before. I know we're doing a soul side tangent. We're getting back to the roof guy in a second. Chill out. You know what? Skip it. Who cares? 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 whatever. All right, if you don't like my hot takes, but uh we're so disconnected from community that we don't have enough people who do know our history. We don't have like like and we don't have enough people who will who will walk with us while we suck. 28:13 Yes. We like we you get dropped by everybody online the first second you're an actual human. Well, but also everyone online is only interacting with who you are in that moment. Yeah. What blip that they see of you. They're not they don't know context of who you've been before. They have no history of this is who you were 10 years ago. This is who you are now. And they also have no interest in who you're going to be 10 years from now. They like all they care about is that little blip in that little moment. And so that creates a situation where a lot of us start to try to 28:42 more often signal who we hope to be and who we want to be. We're putting on this like yeah, I am this. I'm you know, I this is this is where I draw the line. This is my personal convictions because we don't have enough people in our own personal community because like the quit, easiest solution for the whole forest frank thing is just don't submit to the dev awards. Just don't submit and then just like you're already the biggest name of Christian music. Just 29:05 keep being the biggest. Just keep doing that. Keep doing the art. And like I'm not even saying that his heart is in the wrong place for not deciding that to go. Yeah, I don't even think he had like a dark intention of posting it and being like I want to make everyone else feel bad, but the results are the same. Yes, you know, yeah, and it could be that that could be a motivation. Sure again, I don't know his context. Yeah, yeah, you just see the video right and then you're left to try to assume and I'm not trying to. I'm just saying that action then like 29:35 when I was doing those actions, these were our motivations. I can be honest about that now yeah right yeah, but it's the same thing when people comment on my posts and like you know, obviously people will try to do physical stuff. Whether it is like well, like the fat guy or whatever. They don't know the context of where I was before yeah, you know, but the other side of that is that when I see that comment, I know the context of where I was before and none of my friends make those jokes because they know the context of where I was before yeah. 30:04 So all that to say if you feel yourself in a situation where you feel like you're having to not prove yourself, but tell people who you are and feeling a pressure to try to paint a picture of who you are, who you who you might want to be probably because you're feeling disconnected from people yeah, so that's interesting anyway, and that's what I want you to know. I'm a really good friend. 30:29 Yeah, yeah, I tried to hang out. That's why and that's why you're not trying to hang out with Tim's family tonight. I said hey after the shoot, can I just come over and hang out with you and Brian Archer and he goes weeknights aren't great. That's not at all. I said okay, that's not at all. I said can I come on a different time? He said we're busy. He has no word is too busy. I did offer different. here I am trying to be involved in your kid's life. I don't want your kid to just know me as the voice, the other end of the voice on your 30:57 my dad's laughing podcast. You know, it's laughing. Who's the guy that talks during that podcast? I shared. You don't know him. We've never let him over to the house. We got a picture of you holding a yeah last time that's Alex. Who is Jared? You know 31:23 Let me hang out with your face. Let me hang out with your Let me see your kid. I just really hope his next or and I'm screaming. Let me see your kid. 31:42 I think he has to report that I come over to your house tonight. Yes, if that's how you're going to ask, I would like you to get in your freezer. So anyway, don't you have a drawer freezer? Oh yeah, we do have no. We do have a stand up at the basement also yeah, pull to freezer house all over here guys. Yeah, well wait till you have to start storing milk. literally 32:12 filled that anyways. We don't have to talk about that. I have a I store milk. I just love milk. I got it. I got every kind. What do you want? got vitamin D. I got a very thin backyard and half of it's taken up by my dairy cow. I keep. Oh shoot my landlords here. I think he's gonna shoot. You gotta hide my dairy cow from my landlord. Get the cow inside quick. 32:44 I was like hey, do you have any pets? No define pet. I wouldn't say she's a pet. Now I do got some stock. 33:02 all right. Oh my God, I'm glad we did that tangent. That was good. That was good. I yeah. I thought we were just going to make fun of force frank, but that actually turned into like something. I was trying. I was trying to explain why it was. It's not upsetting to me. I'm not like mad about it. I'm it's upsetting to me. 33:18 Thanks for watching our show. you like it, a great way to help out is by being a Patreon supporter. Doing that helps make this show possible, but it also gets a lot of perks for you. You can get every episode a week early ad free. You get access to a Discord where you can meet a lot of other people who love the show and actually hang out with Jaren and I every month on a hangout. And we're also in that Discord chat all the time, hanging, talking with people, talking about episodes and just random stuff in life. It's super fun. 33:41 We do, there's a way to get birthday messages, a free gift, merch discounts in there. So there's a lot of really great reasons to be a Patreon supporter. You get a lot of benefits out of it. And it also makes the show keep happening. So if that sounds great to you, you can go to support.tillin.com or tillin.com slash support, uh or just tillin.com and search around until you find the links and become a Patreon supporter. really appreciate you doing that. But if not, right back to the episode, right? 34:09 So anyways, he had been doing this for years. um They think they're pretty sure that he was responsible somewhere in the ballpark. They don't know how many of these they can pin directly on him, um which is weird because I would think that the thing is they don't know if it's like copycats because it is like someone's cutting a hole in the roof and dropping right into the store. They don't know how many of them were the same guy, but they think they believe 40 to 60 robberies. 34:37 across the country. Literally, how much money is he taking each time? You know, I mean, however much is in a McDonald's at end of the day, a million. How much is that? I don't know how much money I mean, mean, McDonald's is not like cash heavy. I mean, this is this is the nineties, so there wasn't like as much people using credit cards. A lot more people were buying were shopping as much people using credit cards. Yeah, as many people use there wasn't that much people using credit cards. What too many people credit carding? uh 35:06 Not a lot of credit. Oh, that's even better. That's better than what I said. I tried to be dumber and I got smarter. No, so there was a lot more cash being used. OK, so I mean, it's probably somewhere in the ballpark of like 10 to 20 grand, I would assume. Sure. Is what was in there in cash. The a lot of people have talked about like why choose McDonald's and the theories out there. 35:34 are you know you could do a bank and get a lot more cash from a bank, but there's better security. I'm don't they are robbing teenagers yeah robbing teenagers who don't get paid enough to go to the night shift yeah like they just they don't care and so you know how like people rob that have rob stores. Now have you heard about the you know about the gift card hole situation? 35:57 so nothing this has happened in a couple of the subways around the area. That is why I know about this, but what they'll do is they'll call the subway and they'll go hey. I think this is and they'll even say it's like the FBI or whatever they'll go. Hey, we're doing a sting operation on your on your boss and we know that your boss is doing this and if you hang up then we're going to you you're an accomplice to them or whatever. What we need you to do is I need you to pull out two hundred dollars from the cash register 36:25 and go across the street to the dollar general gift card for two hundred dollars and then read me the number on that card and when you hear that you go. That's crazy. No one would fall for this right, but in the moment when you're on the phone and you're a sixteen year old kid, yeah, it's just like 36:45 oh okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, you and it's like and they're like they're like we know and if you hang up and you're you're in trouble and like of this yeah and it doesn't it's not like they just go okay, go get a gift card like it's they're on the phone with you for half an hour and then they walk you through that kind of stuff yeah right yeah and or they like one one person tried to call one of the stores and found out my mom's name because my mom's the regional manager and was like this is Christy 37:12 and the person was like your voice is a little too deep. Just kidding, but like you know hung up and was like that's not Christy yikes and so there. mean they're and with I mean hey not to cause us to crash out. You want to freak out for a second with AI. They can make it sound just like like anybody yeah, just like a specific. I FaceTime you and be that person yeah ha ha ha. It's it's easy. It's things suck 37:42 Did you see? Oh, I'm drawing a blank on his name right now. Their brothers, they box a one wrestles. Oh, Hank, Hank Green, green. Yeah, you're right. I like the alternate universe where the Paul brothers are the green brothers, where the green spot, the Paul brothers are really thoughtful and like which Paul brother Logan. Yeah, not all of leading worship. 38:12 yeah, well, it's jake paul. just got all these a videos like hundreds of AI videos of yeah since or two came out of him doing stuff. He's not doing and it's pretty funny. He had to put out a video to be like hey, this isn't funny. Yeah, I make a logo on it still, so it's like hey guys, that video that you saw is not me just so you know I would not do those things. They can't every, but it's getting close to mouth, very close and here's the thing they're trying to they were talking about making a whole feed. I know we're getting the roof stuff, but like 38:41 I know you're really interested. You're like talk about the but the roof, you know, no and so, but they have the whole feed like they're talking about doing a whole feed of a videos. Yeah, are you into that? Yeah. Does anybody want that? No wants that speaking of AI, though read those comments. We got all these com. Oh my gosh yeah on the project blue beam episode on YouTube. If you don't remember the project blue beam episode, you definitely should watch it, but long for a short. It's an alien episode yeah and I'm going to read you 39:09 I'm going to read you two or three comments and see if you can pick up. me if you know what's going on here. What's going on so because like I looked at these are new comments and these are all three hours ago. At this point, there's twelve of them twelve new comments. This is an old episode. This is like two or three years ago. I appreciate how this video keeps the vibe chill, but still sneaks in some real deep stuff when they mentioned Sergey Manas warning about religion and illusion merging with tech. I thought of the project blue beam by hail Palmer 39:37 That book hits differently because hail explains like a blueprint, not just a rumor. Here's another comment. LMAO the way they joked about governments dropping UFOs for engagement had me dying, but also thinking too hard from the book, the project blue beam by hail Palmer hail mentioned hit 39:56 the fake alien is a different one. The fake alien part Loki gave me chills alien emoji. The way they joked about the government setting up holograms in the sky sounded funny, but it reminded me of something I read from the book, the project blue beam by hail Palmer. This is twelve different comments from like all these different YouTube accounts that clearly this person hail Palmer all hail the Palmer all hail Palmer, but a and that's 40:21 bought a bunch of bod, so and I really hired an agency. He probably doesn't know that the agency is doing this and you should. You should know this about social media. Yeah, the thing you're arguing you're getting all these like threads arguments and like arguing on Facebook comments. You should know that you are most likely arguing with an A. I. That's only prompt is disagree disagree. You are arguing with a and they'll say something back here. Like how does any person think that that's true and you'll get all worked up literally? I will see it in my comment section. I will see people argue for fourteen hours. 40:51 I'll post something in the Morgan. That's like a little stupid little joke. Yeah, I got posted with my Halloween thing and I was like don't let your kid dresses Thomas the Tank Engine. You know it's gonna ruin their life and the comments are insane and they're fighting over like well, here's the true origins. First of all, don't talk to me about Halloween. All right, I know about how eight years ago and so ah but like they're just saying stuff and then I will come back later that night and the same two people. My favorite thing to do when two people are arguing one of my posts 41:20 I let him argue. They'll argue for days yeah yeah yeah they'll go back and forth for two or three days and then right at the heat of the argument. I'll block both of them and they'll never get the resolution for that conversation. They're just stuck, just stuck. That's that's diabolical. I just go block block be free. m 41:44 but you know they're looking at their their look at their notifications. They're to find it. They can't find the like oh, but I said this. Oh, I said something so good to this guy here and you're like they're just stuck on the edge for the rest of the life. Just decided I don't know what I think about that. I don't know who I become. I become very un Christian in my responses. I don't know who I become when I respond to people on threads, especially because someone the other day was like I posted about the Halloween thing. I was like addresses Thomas. I think engine when I was six and my life has been bad ever since yeah and so I responded. This was 42:14 Oh, this was decades ago. Let it go. I go decades. I'm 15. 42:21 or someone was like wow. This is really sad that you're holding on to this Halloween's been around for way longer than you and I said well, how he was invented when I was four maybe Google stuff before you just respond and like I've just decided that I'm just going to say stuff. I'm just going to be rude because it might be an AI. Yeah, it might be a robot, so take that bot, but that's where we're at. Yeah, it's a mess. It's, but the other thing to what sucks and to get into the you know the 42:49 the crash out that we have often. We often have this is that somebody who's a normal person or at least used to that will read a hundred comments that say this absurd stupid thing right that were made by AI and then they will go. Oh, the majority of people think that yeah, which is and they will either crash out because they think the majority of people think that or begin to change their well because the whole cracker barrel stuff. 43:17 You know we saw that like what was it more than sixty percent of the engagement that came in the cracker barrel conversation was bots yeah yeah which that agency should have a lawsuit against somebody for that maybe look it's who who do you open AI? Oh they don't care do it the whole they should they don't though the whole no I know know open AI doesn't but that that agency that created that logo sure like they they're getting blacklisted from design now but the whole so the whole 43:45 you know, M. O. Of open A. I. Are these large companies is they have enough money to see me there the copyright stuff where it's like they were. They wanted you to have to opt out where it's like hey, don't you can't use our stuff. Otherwise, we're just going to use it unless you tell us not to yeah, which is insane and be like I'm going to break into your house unless you tell me not to don't I'm going to I'm going to bore a hole in your roof unless you say not to let you say no. That doesn't make that okay yeah, but what they're they're up with their 44:13 viewpoint is is we're just going to do it. We're going to get sued of course, but by allowing all this content to be in our Sora products or our uh our generation videos, then we're just going to capitalize that market. Then by the time that you those lawsuits come to pay out, they're going to settle most of them out of court. We're going to settle it for you know, even if it cost us 44:40 six billion dollars, we made 200 billion. So it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. And that's the stuff that's radicalized me. For real. Genuinely, even if it cost them 200 billion, they're going to make that up the next year. We made it up. You're going to make it up the following year. That sucks. It's insurmountable. That's so insane. Yeah, it is. That's correct. 45:05 and it's and people were and people are like me and jaren. You seem pretty sad about stuff lately. Yeah, I think about it. I go, I why look around sometimes? Oh, that's really bad. Oh, that's really bad. That's really bad. That's really bad. Also random. That's so So bad. 45:30 and then I look up and you go. Why don't you make another joke about chick-fil-a? Why don't you be funny for a minute? Can you be funny again? Please sorry I got to quit reading books. Sorry, need to quit paying attention. That's what it feels like anyway, so this guy, not Frank post and says oh, I'm not going to go to the double wars because the double wars are dumb and stupid and worldly and then it just pushes us all over the edge. Meanwhile, he's settling my lawsuit with him outside a court 46:00 no, but for real anyway, we do crash out about it often. It's a good time, ah so the world's fine and good. Don't worry about it, so Ruffin Rob's forty to sixty McDonald's across the country, a couple Burger Kings, a couple block, but and that's the other thing you said earlier too. They can pay for it. They don't care. Yeah, they don't care at all. They're somewhere in the middle of this. They started to realize. Oh, you know this might be dangerous, and so they did put out a bounty on them. They put a ten thousand dollar bounty on his head. 46:28 and by down to like it wasn't like a kill that guy and bring up the corporate yeah. It was like any information will give a ten. we put bounties down on each other? Yeah, I'll give you ten thousand dollars. If you bring me is that on a no, that was not what I was going. What do you mean? Because you mean by you just looked at the camera and said, I'll give you ten thousand dollars. If you kill Jaren, I did say that I said. If you bring me his head on a platter, 46:56 There are ways you can do that while you're alive. 47:01 What do you mean by bounty? What I mean? What else could a bounty be? Do you think that bounty hunters go kill people? I mean the good ones. What I'm saying is could we just put it out there to rope them up? like rope them up. What is the? What world do you live in the bag? bounty hunter is going out with a lasso or killing someone and bringing their head on a silver platter. I mean 47:30 if a bounty hunter can arrest me and take me to your house. Yeah, I just show up at your driveway just come. Well, we got to figure out how to pay for this buddy. This is a really funny podcast bit. That's a good bit, but now we have to take out a loan to pay this guy. It'd be worth it. That hunters are don't glorified ransom. Holders is what it is. 47:57 That is true. Their legal right and they hold they they arrest you and then they go to the police department and they go pay me ten thousand dollars. Not give you this guy. Yeah, that is a little. Why is that allowed to be allowed? Who knows just so so they put on a bounty McDonald's, Donald puts out a bounty for him. I don't know if they ever paid that bounty because no one ever was able to give any information on who it was yeah. What ended up happening on May twenty two thousand he is in uh North Carolina 48:26 And he broke his rule. And I don't know if we don't have like interviews with this guy. So we don't know if it was a rule, but based on patterns, he would never rob more than once in a day. And he would never rob any stores that were close to each other. Like he would rob and then he would skip town and he would show up in a different town and rob that town weeks later. And so there was one day, May 20th, 2000, he hit one McDonald's and then he went about six miles to the other side of town and hit another McDonald's. And 48:56 This was his fatal flaw because ah at the second location, one of the employees triggered a silent alarm and he wasn't aware that they did that. And so he ran through the forest to a nearby church where he parked his car and a cop that was, they were already looking for him. They were already on the hunt. Saw him come out of the forest and run towards that car. And then he ran back into the forest when he saw the cop and the cop was like, I saw you. 49:20 you're not getting away. I'm a forest guy. They call me the forest man, the forest man. I'm not the roof and I swear you call me forest Frank. So once he realized the cop was chasing him, he didn't put up a fight. He just walked over and he gave him his hands and he's like what's your name? He goes Sir, he's like he's like guess I'm arrested aren't I well shucks. You know what he was trying to do is he's putting a hole in all those buildings. He was going to put gigantic hamster tubes and connect all of them 49:51 so that way he can all right. I'd be like I was trying to just crawl across the country. I go to the next McDonald's building a tube system. What's that to running across our city? Oh, that's the roof. That's the McDonald's super high way yeah. Every McDonald's in the country is connected by one of those tunnel boy tunnel boy. They smell that using all the material from the play place. It's also crazy. They used to have a play place 50:20 and also McDonald's is McDonald's still a safe place like to drop off. That's crazy. You're talking about is McDonald's still a safe place. Do you know what that is like yellow sign? That's a safe place. I have no yeah where you can just abandon a child there. It's crazy that you that's what that sign McDonald's a sign means you if you see the safe place sign. That means that if you want to surrender your kid, you can just drop them off. You can give a kid to the fire station, the fire station. I'll like well take this kid 50:45 yeah and then you know the permit the foster yeah McDonald's is a safe place or at least it historically has been yeah, but I did. Would they train the employees on what to do? Yeah, the sixteen year old kid at the front counter is like oh fresh baby. You got a guy dropping to the ceiling right? Hey guys, just here to rub and then someone else is like yeah. Hold on. Where's your mom? 51:13 kids like that is insane. That McDonald's was ever a safe place. That is genuinely insane. I love the idea that someone just brought their kid to work. There is in the back working and a manager was like oh, a loose child loose child. We know what to do with that and then so I heard that kid to the police. All the place was like hey, we got a kid. We got a kid here yeah and then the employee in the back is done with their shift and they're like they just got let out of the freezer 51:42 that is true because McDonald's are always just kind of uh back at when this was a thing when they had play places. McDonald's were just crawling with kids. They'd be all over the place. They'd be running like I mean, how do know when I was growing up? My mom worked at subway like for in the physical subway and I would just be in a booth yeah and it's very possible that I mean you know most employees probably know, but there's way more employees in McDonald's than there are as subway subway. There's like three people working yeah. 52:07 and McDonald's entirely possible for someone to go. Whose kid is that? I was good is that and then for another employee to go. I don't know and then those two employees are render under the state render him to the state. That's crazy. My fourth birthday party was at subway. That's real. That's a good party. It was great subway. You didn't even close it. My mom was just working subway in the late nineties early two thousands was so good still is. It still is good, but it's not what it was. I used to be so you know why 52:35 a while. You want crash out again? No, we don't have time to crash out. I I'm we're genuinely not even halfway through this story. Oh shoot at three hours. We can crash out about the story. What else have okay? I'll shut up, so we'll crash out about say hey, if you want to hear us crash out about subway, why don't you join us on page right in here next week's episode? It's available right now. 53:00 and next week we crash out about why subways quality is gone down. Remember like remember that for the next episode. We need to bring that up. 53:11 stupid, so he turns himself in okay and they take them. They take him to jail. They are interviewing them. They him on the second floor. That's their flaw. They're interviewing him and he is claiming he's just a copycat. He's like he's like I'm not the guy and do all those. I just saw what he did and I was like oh, this sounds like a good idea and then they go. Yeah, but what about the one on other side of town? He goes he was here today. 53:42 I should have got an autograph. Wow. I believe I shared this. I so close to my hero and so far. Roof. 53:57 That is so much oh you hate that it got you, so he's claiming he's just a copycat on one hand is somewhat believable because this is genuinely the only time he ever did two places in one day and it's the only time he ever got caught. So it's somewhat believable that it might have been the same guy or a copycat, but either way they did not believe them. 54:22 they did not have evidence to connect them to any other ones, though they just had evidence to connect them to these yeah, but as the nineties, so we know how the story goes. So he goes to trial and they try him for the two robberies that they do have an actual connection that they do, so he gets a hard do both of those. Yes, he for sure did both of them this guy yes, and so he gets charged with these two crimes and and this is our thin mustache guy. Yes, yeah got it yeah. This guy yeah the rooftop suspect 54:51 ah And so he gets charged with these two robberies and they go through the whole uh Court hearing and sentencing and what they ended up doing is they sentence him to 45 years in prison Which is pretty clear that they said yeah, we know we only have evidence for two of these but we're gonna charge you with all of them under the books and so he gets 45 years in jail and 55:18 they bounced him around prisons for a few years and he eventually landed at the Brown Creek uh Brown Creek Correctional Center in like South, uh South Eastern um North Carolina, like a little outside of Charlotte. uh Just say North Carolina, Southeastern, South, East, South, North Carolina, West of Charlotte. It was it was m 55:46 South, Eastern, North Carolina, West of Charlotte, West or North Carolina, East of Charlotte, Southwestern yeah, that's right, North Carolina, just of Charlotte, Charlotte, just north of South. uh Why do you do all that just north of South Carolina? Gosh, hey Tim, could you quit laugh? We got a lot to get to. We're only halfway through the story right now. Could you buckle up? Can you pull it together? Okay, yes, I can. I can't do that. 56:15 So he goes to this prison, he's in this prison for serving his 45 year sentence. uh And over the course of a couple of years, he ends up, ah he's a really nice guy. People like him. So they start to, like because of his good behavior, he starts getting privileges and eventually he gets the right to begin working. So he starts working in the prison uh and he ends up working in the metal shop. And the thing about the roof man, Jeffrey. 56:44 is he's very astute. Like he's always paying attention to his surroundings. So he begins to pick up that the prison is very uh regimented. Everything is on a schedule. Everybody does the exact same thing at every time, at every like to the minute every day. And he realizes that this metal shop he works at has delivery trucks that come in every day, drop off their deliveries and leave at the same time every day. Same exact schedule. And so during his shifts, he begins to build a box. 57:14 and it's this plywood box that he paints black on the bottom. We spent so much time doing other stuff and you're a do I 57:21 really interesting story. We've been covering the really interesting story. You stop the story's been interesting the whole time. Do bits. I did not tell you to do bits. I never told you to do bits. There was a bit. There was a bit that we we we had gaslighting me right now. You were here for that right. We had a cover earlier when he said yeah, you literally went. You literally went looking like I look at you. I was like I don't have any bits today and you're like look. I looked at my note. Yeah, you said you have any bits and I said looking to see if you got any. We could do bits 57:47 I didn't say I didn't say I never I never acted like this episode needed the bit I never, but every episode, we've read a ble a me. It's no. I wish I had some fruit snacks. I'm so mad 58:01 Ha 58:03 I'm not saying I'm not saying I need some fruit snacks to calm down. I need to raise my blood sugar. I'm not saying you. I did it. I told you not to do bits. I'm telling I didn't tell you we needed to pump this full of bits. This is you brought the devil words yeah, but how you you started to tell him about that. I was like no, this is perfect. Let's tell him in this episode. Let's drag force Frank's name video. We're going to put on the internet. Let's not do it in private. This is my personal conviction. 58:33 Okay, so he builds this little box and by box look, it's like it's more of like a plywood platform with a couple edges on the side. Okay, he paints it black and what he does is he waits and are the people at the prison not like what are you building? You know, saying like he's just doing this in the shop. He works at the shop. Everyone's just like yeah, that's whatever a that must be for 59:01 the guards. The guards have no idea what they're working on. They're like yeah, they got an assignment. All right, sure. I work on their working on their work. You know, yeah, it's a really big license plate. He's building that license plate must be for a semi truck. It's a big one yeah, because everybody knows semi drugs got big license. So he builds the second half of that didn't need to be said. You have to understand that I'm trying 59:28 Hey, thanks for listening to Things I Learned Last Night. It would do us a huge favor if you could just share this episode with somebody or just share the show. Tell someone you like it. That helps us grow the show. Another way to help us grow the show is to support our merch, which is actually super comfy. We changed to a new merch supplier a couple years ago called Fourth Wall. You can buy our stuff at shop.tillen.com. None of this is a pressure, by the way, but it just really does help us grow the show and it helps, you know, get the word out and people ask me about my hoodie in the airport all the time. So they're really comfy. Would love for you to support the show. 59:57 And either way, thanks for being here. We're glad that we get to do this podcast. 01:00:13 Give it a second buddy, calm down. He builds a start over. 01:00:29 So he builds this enclosure and he waits for a master. 01:00:38 Okay. And he waits for one of those delivery trucks to come. Yeah. The delivery truck comes, they're dropping everything off. He waits for no one to be looking and then he runs over there with his enclosure and he slides underneath the thing and he pulls it up and he hangs to the undercarriage of the truck with that. So no one, just looks like this black box when they do the mirror underneath. Yeah, it's just black. And so the delivery truck pulls out of the bay from the wood shop, drives the prison walls. 01:01:06 The guards do the mirror thing and it's just the black. And then he, they just drive away with him hanging on the bottom of the truck and he waits for the truck to get a few miles away. And at a stop, he just drops and it just keeps driving. And then he rolls out of the road and runs into the forest and then he's home free. And so the one caveat, the guy is wearing a prison jumpsuit. Yeah. And so he traded some cigarettes while he was in the prison. 01:01:34 that I don't know how he acquired, but you know, think it's a way. So you trade some cigarettes for makeshift sewing supplies and he sewed street clothes out of his bedding and so he made like a t shirt and like pants and so when it looked like it probably didn't look good, but it didn't look like prison clothes sure point and so he changed into that in the woods walked out and he hitchhiked to Charlotte and he gets to Charlotte and he's got nowhere to go nowhere to stay, but he's not in prison and so he's walking around Charlotte 01:02:05 looking for somewhere to be, and so he just happens upon a toys or us in the suburbs of charlotte. He walks around toys arrest till closing time and he finds the bike rack and in the bike rack behind the bike rack. There's this little cubby door of like some like a crawl space with like some pipes and stuff, and so he just crawls in there around closing time and just waits. Oh okay, okay, okay. He's gonna rob toys are us and so then toys are us closes 01:02:33 and he waits in there until everyone's gone and then he comes out and he lives inside of toys are he's in toys of us alone and so he goes he goes back to the mandor sweet and he finds their centers sweet yeah to his back to the box that they've got it sitting up top. You know they can look down stock full of chicken strips. Isn't that crazy that like the richest route like you can buy a sweet at like an NFL game and it's still just 01:03:02 and the reason for that is because Cisco food distribution is the only food distribution that the companies can use and subway uses them and that's why all food tastes bad. Yeah, we're going to crash out about it, but I'm also going to crash out about right now, so okay, he goes to the manager suite yeah and he gets out the the owner's manual for their security system and he reads all about it and he learns like how 01:03:32 Oh yes, okay, and he learns how still VHS at this point right yeah. He learns how the cameras work and he just learns how to make sure he doesn't end up on any of the cameras overnight and so he takes control of their security system, their camera system and all of their like motion detectors and stuff like that and he just develops this routine where day after day he sits in this cubby where the bikes go and sits in there while the stores open and when the store closes he gets out and he rides the bikes around toys or us 01:04:01 he climbs up to the roof and he raises a little like like it's toys are us dude who wouldn't want to live there yeah. He gets a remote control car and he takes it up to the roof and he's remote control trying from the roof and then he's like he's eating. He's surviving off of the all the little kids, that's and baby food like he's just eating that stuff. That's that's has sustenance. They sell baby food at Toys R Us. Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Yeah, they had the before babies are us was a separate building. It was like a wing 01:04:28 of toys or us and then they bring us out to a whole nother building and then they went out of business yeah so but at this is this day this point in time is and mean at least you're not in you live in a toys or us, but at least you're not in prison. I guess yeah yeah and so he does this for a couple months same towards or us same toys arrest he starts so every night he's going into toys arrest and the employees aren't like and he's nice. Yeah, they're like what's up Jeffrey? 01:04:58 Yeah, well, I don't know. I don't know if he's like they're like. I've never seen that guy buy something. Have you the vibe I get from the vibe I get is that nobody in toys arrest sees him because like he hides in that cubby throughout the day and he comes out at night. He's like a little goblin. 01:05:16 he's a buzz like your and he just plays with the toys overnight. That's crazy and eats the baby. That's what I'm saying. Just freaking a play with toys at least I'm not in prison and then, but he starts to get a little lonely and so he starts kind of like 01:05:44 okay. I need to start robbing places to make money. It's the only skill I have and he's like I need to start kind of looking around town getting into this community to see where the places are that I can rob, toys or us. I live. This is home, that's home and so he ends up befriending a local woman by the name of Lee Wayne Scott and they kind of like start to build like an actual genuine relationship and he tells her local woman. He does her say that what I want to be friends, a local woman, 01:06:14 what am I supposed to call her? I don't know you even friends, some chick ways that that's way. Worse, see the friend, friend, so I'm a chick. He even friends, a local woman. I said it the right way sure, so he tells her that he works at a very secure facility. It works for the government and it's a top secret facility. 01:06:37 and she's like I don't even know where it is and he's she's like that's the best. whole point yeah he's like he actually lives in this facility. It's like a top secret facility. He lives and works in and he can't tell her anything about what she does or what he does and she believes he has different clothes by now. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah and also he stole them from the rest. He's wearing baby clothes. He's wearing a very stretch out so dinosaur t shirt. 01:07:03 I just wore pajamas. I mean, it's just like, yeah, I can't tell you what I do. you what I do. 01:07:13 Okay, no, I assume and I don't know this like there's not reports, but I assume he probably was skimming some cash at toys arresting going and buying clothes. I assume like that's maybe our yeah. I don't know what about the showering at this stage. I do know a later stage, but at this stage I don't know about showering um and so Lee Lee was very involved at a local church called Crossroads Presbyterian Church, so he starts going to church with her and he starts attending a small group. 01:07:42 here's the thing he can't tell everyone his real name, so he's going by the name John Zorn and so they all know him as John Zorn, John Zorn Zorn Zorn Zorn, yeah cool name, John Zorn and so oh that reminds me we got to shout out John Zorn who on Nebraska is a fourteen year old kid who listens to our show. 01:08:05 and left a left a review and was like, please give me a shout out. We'll shout out to you, Johnny Zorn, Johnny Zorn. um So he actually starts stealing toys from toys or us and donating them to the church. And so every time he comes to church, he's got more toys for the community and everyone's like man, this John Zorn is such a good guy. Yeah, he starts doing it for Lee. Lee's got some kids and so she's like, oh, this is great. Like he's bringing toys 01:08:33 like he's bringing Christmas Decorations, year, they're still in toys from those. Hey, so are the ones your stepdad gave you just so you know, so he's becoming like ingrained in the community. Like he's actually becoming like involved in the sure. Meanwhile, he's like he's like I got to get my next robbery going and so he's like I can't like live in toys or us forever. 01:08:57 and so he realizes in a long term plan. Yeah, he realizes what's convenient about this choice of us is right next door. There's a circuit city and circuit city had already shut down and so this is an abandoned circuit city and so one night while he's what year is this now is this two thousand four okay yeah and so one night he's sitting in his little cubby behind the bikes and he burrows through the wall into the circuit city and so now he's got a secret passageway 01:09:23 between toys, arrest and circuits. Wait, what? Oh, the buildings are connected. The buildings are connected yeah, and so he burrows through the wall into the abandoned circuit city. Oh, he really does Shawshank Redemption, and so he gets into the circuit city and he finds a spot uh and a stairwell to like the circuit city basement and he builds a an apartment there and so he paints the walls. He puts up some posters from the toys arrest. There's like Spider Man posters on the wall. He gets a TV. I don't know how he got the TV, but he got a so those are to us 01:09:52 It might have been circuit city actually because there's some products that I don't think that is listed that he has in his apartment, but they don't be circuit city. It seems like a city, so he's got a tv, he's got a dvd player, he's got a collection of dvds, he's got a mattress in there, he's got a stockpile of baby food and children's room. It's like it's like any staircase. It's like the spot underneath the staircase and so he painted the walls in that spot and put a bed in there and so he's basically it's like it's not big. It's like probably smaller than this room. 01:10:19 yeah, but it's big enough for him to put a little mattress and a tv up and some posters and paint the walls and like no one's well circuit cities abandoned. Yeah, no one's in that circuit city anymore sure, and so he's just living in this room and he's got a stockpile of all his food there. His kids snack is baby that feels risky to me, but okay yeah and all his favorite action figures from the store and what he ends up doing is he actually steals a bunch of baby monitors from toys or us and he mounts them all over toys or us and he has the baby monitors in his 01:10:49 in his circuit city apartment so he can kind of monitor and know when it's safe to go in at Toys R Us and what sides of Toys R Us he can go to. 01:10:59 Yeah, so in the nineties, just a recap in the nineties, he broke into McDonald's and blockbuster and Burger King, right then for four years in the two thousand he was in prison right now for at least a solid year in two thousand four. He is just surveilling a specific toys are us in southwest North Carolina, east of Charlotte. 01:11:26 Yeah, you're north of South Carolina, correct, north of South Carolina. That's true. That is correct in the Eastern time zone. 01:11:42 yeah you're you're dead on your dead on and so and then he actually pipes a water line from the toys or us into his little apartment so he can shower. It's so he puts a little shower in his little apartment and because he just tapped the water line and ran it all the way in okay, and so he's got a whole set up there. He's like living out of this place and it's a pretty comfortable life for him. Where's that water running off to 01:12:08 there's probably I assume like it's the bottom of a it's a basement stairwell, so I'm assuming like a water drain somewhere in there. I'm assuming he assumes to it's just a pool of his used shower water somewhere in that Sergan City Basement, um so he's living down there for a while. How long is this going on? I don't know exactly how long, but I do know that over the course of that year he conducts a couple of the robberies. 01:12:36 that were like they seem to be preparation robberies. um The big one being he robbed a uh pawn shop to get a gun. And I don't know the details of that robbery and how he ended up getting out with that gun. But he I do know he managed to rob ah a pawn shop and get the gun. So he acquires a gun. uh And one morning he wakes up and uh it's boxing day. 01:13:04 of two thousand four so later that year later that same year um and so he you know what boxing days yes and so he isn't it thanksgiving though. No it's the day after Christmas because the all the gifts you didn't want throw one. That's not what it's called. Oh speaking of that who was I just talking to about in January beginning of January 01:13:30 the gigantic line that exists at Costco of people returning their Christmas trees. Oh really people, old do people buy the fake Christmas tree from Costco because their return policy first of all Costco's return policy is that if you didn't use more than fifty percent of that product, you can return it wow, not the food stuff, but like we bought a big box of cat food. Our cats did not like the food, so like they only we only had taken six cans of this thirty cans and so we took the other twenty four cans back and they gave us a full refund. That's crazy. 01:13:59 and so we're like oh we're just going to do that over and over and over again. That is wild. So now I once a week I return a box of of cat food. We just feed our cats for free. 01:14:13 is that you should try that we don't do that part. I try that with baby food. That is true though. Like if it's if you have more than fifty percent of the product because they'll just combine it though. I don't know what they do with it. They just throw it away is what they do because it's easier for them. It's easier. It's they lose less in customer retention than they do and just throwing away what I'm well, you know, like so they sell rotisserie chickens at a lower cost. A loss leader is what it is and so it's at the back of the so on boxing day. Do they throw those Christmas trees away? 01:14:43 probably there's no way. I mean they're, I mean they're like six hundred dollars. If it's in decent shape, they probably just resell it, but they could also they could also sell it to like a consignment like you know, sell it at cost or I mean there's there's a I have gone the beginning of the year to go quit, quit grocery shopping or whatever and there's a long line of people with the cart and they all have Christmas trees. They're returning that's crazy wild. That's so nuts interesting. You know what I have never mind. We don't need that so 01:15:11 boxing date December twenty six yes, thousand four boxing day is the day after Christmas, the day before Costco return your tree day, the day before Jennifer's dead in the parking lot, and so he he wakes up in the morning. He goes the dentist gets some work done um and then he comes back to toys, arrest, wait for closing with the dentist. Yeah, he got some work done. Okay, a little teeth cleaning um and uh he goes in there and they uh 01:15:39 waits for closing time, same thing he normally does. And then he comes out and he does a lot robbery at the Toys R Us. And here's the interesting thing about Toys R Us, there's no freezer. And so he just sends everybody to the back of the store and that works out pretty well. They all go to back of the store. He gets all the money from the day and then he tells them, okay, you guys wait here. I'm going to pull the fire alarm. So the police come and I'm going to get out of here. You guys are good. Okay. Like everybody feel good. You guys feel good. I feel good. And so he tells them he leaves, he pulls the fire alarm and they think he ran. 01:16:08 He climbs through his cubby hole back into Circuit City and he's watching on the baby monitors. The police show up and they're like, yeah, he ran when he pulled the fire alarm. And so the police are like, oh, he's long gone. And so they're canvassing the city trying to find him. And he's sitting in Circuit City next door just watching the investigation. They never find him. And so he's like, hey, I think I just found the cheat code. And so he... 01:16:33 starts to plan his next hit and he's like I'm just going to hit toys are us guys like I'm just going to keep hitting toys are us because I can just walk out into my cubby. This is what I'm saying. Criminals are smart for a second and then they go. What if I was dumb? What if instead of this part I got dumb? If I just did that again and so but then he realizes oh shoot. I went to the dentist and now they have my dental records 01:17:02 and he's like I got to go get my dental records out of there, so he goes the dentist office climbs up on the roof cuts his old through the roof drops in and he no he doesn't yes he does he he hold the dentist hold the dentist to try to find his his dental records. No one was there. He goes there after hours. No one's are there because like I just need to find my records, so he's so he did do all of them. Then is what we're talking. He did all the other one 01:17:26 things. Oh for sure. Okay, okay, okay, okay, he's not a copy cat. This is for sure the same did it and so he's digging through all their filing cabinets trying to find his records and he can't find them and he's been there for a while, so he starts and he goes panic. He goes Zorn. I forgot I was looking for my name, my name, but I forgot the alias. I gave them 01:17:46 but he doesn't remember that while he's there, so he's he's panicking. He's like I've been here for too long. He's like I have to find this. I already cut the whole ceiling. I got to find it. I can't find it. can't figure it out, so he burns the dentist office down and he runs and so things are spiraling a little bit a little bit. Yeah, 01:18:09 so the police now an arson on their hands and and a whole they have like evidence that the hole was cut and so like before this happened, there was a whole gun the roof. They're like we know this guy escaped from prison uh just east of charlotte, north carolina, north of south carolina, south west north carolina. Okay, and so they've got reason to believe he's around here somewhere and so now they're kind of like on edge, like keeping their eye open for him right. 01:18:35 He waits a little while for kind of the heat to die down and he's like, okay, I need I need some money. I need I need to hit I need some money. It's that it toys arrest again. And so he crawls out of his cubby hole one night right before close and he does another hit on Toys R Us. ah But when he does this, he he's he tries to plan it to where he comes out like right when they're locking the doors is like his goal. Right. And so he sees them walking to go do that. And he comes out. 01:19:04 He pulls his gun and as he's doing that, they're going to lock the doors, but it's kind of that awkward time where it's like you're walking in, right? As they're closing the doors and like the employees, like they kind of have the choice to like, are they going to let you in or are going to say, no, sorry, we're closed. And, but this time they say, Oh, we're to let them in because the person coming in was a police officer. And so they're like, Oh, you can come on in, but we're going to lock the doors behind you. And as they let her in, he's pulling the gun. And so he's pulling the gun out. 01:19:30 to be like this is a stick up in the police officers there and he realizes that there's a police officer there, so he thinks quickly and he punches her in the face and steals her gun. It is like this is a stick up. It's like sorry. What's your name? I'm the roof. Hello, it's nice to meet you. Sorry I had to punch you. I really I feel bad about that for two reasons. One, I don't like assaulting law enforcement and I don't like punching women, so I know that was bad. I know that was bad on multiple fronts. Yeah, 01:20:00 My name is Tyler Cox. 01:20:05 So he ushers the ball to the back of the store. Same same game plan. He's like, he's like, we're still going to do it. We're going to do it as he takes me to the of the store, take the back of the store with that with that cop. We punch in the face. He's got her gun and takes him out of the back of the store. They all do the do the thing. He pulls the fire alarm and then he hurries back to his little cubby and climbs back into Circuit City and he's watching from his camera and he realizes as he's watching from the camera that the cops are getting too smart. Like they're like, yeah, he didn't. 01:20:34 But he didn't run when no one saw him leave the store. And so they like check the cameras like he never left. And so like he's in here somewhere. And so then they look around and they're there for hours. Eventually they find that cubby hole. They crawl through into Circuit City and he just like relents and he just comes out and he's like, I'm sorry, you got me. And they find him and they end up arresting him. Ironically, they pulled all of the DVDs and 01:21:00 what they and I don't know how true this is, but the articles say like the most used DVD or the one that was in the DVD player, the one that was in the DVD player oceans, eleven catch me if you can. Okay, I say so cliche just and so they end up charging him for the I probably wasn't true and then one of the cops was like yeah dude. had all these DVDs and the one that was in the DVD player catch me can and we caught him 01:21:29 I caught why you do that weird thing with your tongue. I don't put that in the article in the article. It's like and he was doing this weird thing. He said don't put that in the article. I like the whole thing for that. We're like I got him and so now he ended up getting numerous charges. The arson, the multiple robberies in and Charlotte and obviously you know breaking out of prison and so now he's he got another forty year sentence. 01:21:58 and so he's been serving that sentence at Central Prison in Raleigh, North Carolina. He has attempted to escape again in 2009 and 2017. Both of those were thwarted by the guards and so he didn't actually get out his current expected release date is December 4th, 2036. So mark your calendars and watch your ceilings that day because knows December one. 01:22:21 December fourth twenty thirty six. Wow, so it's coming up about a little over ten years. Not Santa on your roof. It's the roof. It's the roof man, but here's what's really exciting about this and why did this episode because tomorrow we are getting a Channing data movie based on oh wow and it on. Okay, I saw good. I saw a poster for this the other day. You know what I thought about when I saw this though. Wait tomorrow. What are you talking about? When is this episode come out? I mean 01:22:50 today. It's October nine. We're filming this the day before it releases. Oh, I was gonna say and so by the time this release, some of you might have seen this. It's been out for eighteen days. I saw the poster for this and what's crazy is that this comes out tomorrow and like I have not seen any advertising for this really that's. I mean that is true. You don't see advertising for movies that much anymore. Oh my gosh, what my wife keeps texting me. I've told her we're filming sorry 01:23:20 but yeah, she sent me seventeen texts. Oh my gosh well, the movie looks great. Jaren's got to text his wife, so we'll crash out of a I to respond to her real quick. uh So all right well fiddle off fiddle off. Thanks for listening to things. I learned last night. If you like that episode, you want another one. We do an episode about the barefoot band of the guy who would just break into people's homes. They're usually their second home right and then we just kind of live there for a little while and who went on a whole wild chase and led the police on this social media stuff and so it was a really interesting story. 01:23:49 We covered that. Please share this episode with somebody. Tell people you like the show. That's the easiest way to grow. This thing uh is a friend telling a friend. Hey, here's this stupid thing I enjoy and I think you might enjoy it too. We will see you next week for another episode. We're here every week. We will never stop doing this and if we did, it's because we've just committed to becoming AI characters and even then if one of us dies, we're just going to put it out as an AI podcast, right? uh Thanks for being here. uh


In the late 1990s, a man named Jeffrey Allen Manchester earned a strange nickname — the Roofman. His crime spree would go down as one of the most unusual and oddly polite series of robberies in American history. What started with a few break-ins quickly turned into a coast-to-coast pattern of fast-food heists, most often targeting McDonald’s restaurants. The Roofman’s … Read More

The True Story Behind Moneyball

10-21-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, happy to be here. Welcome to an episode where we're not going to do any bits. Tim's going to tell the story and I'm not going to say anything. Go ahead to all right. Have you ever heard of Billy Bean? 00:16 What do want to say about William being first in Billy last name beam? You don't you got anything to say about Billy B. You got any jokes to make about that name? You can't. You're just going to let that name lie. You're just going to be okay with the fact that this guy's birth name is Billy Bean. I need you guys understand. I need you to see right now. I'm done being gas little this podcast. I'm not doing any bits right now. 00:48 Why'd you say it like that? 00:53 We've been bad. 00:58 Would you come make us good? I promise we're worth it. 01:09 Things I learned last night. 01:18 just wasting your time. Okay, fine. Billy being born, Marsha, twenty nine, nineteen sixty two to Orlando, Florida. 01:33 I need you to engage with these jobs. I need you and I need you to be here with me. I'm here with you. They're just not fun. You just went Billy Bean in that funny in that one. It is you guys. It's really funny. I'm do an episode about God ain't Billy Bean. It is funny. I mean didn't even say funny. You just went Billy Bean say with a funny voice. Try it with a funny voice. Try it. 01:57 We'll start over. Ready? Try with a funny voice. I'm not gonna do. I'll laugh. I'll laugh. got it. No, no, no, do it. You're not gonna laugh at it. You're gonna do the exact same thing you did when I said it normally Billy B. No, see, I don't even do it turns out. It wasn't funny, so oh 02:16 So Billy being born in Orlando, Florida, born to Orlando, Florida, as his dad's name Orlando, Florida. No, I just like the idea that okay, so he's born to Orlando, Florida, Orlando, Florida in nineteen sixty two. Yes, okay. What did William Bean do? So Billy Bean, he was a born and raised baseball player. He loved baseball uh and all throughout his William Garbonzo. 02:45 Okay, he tried not to. He tried to hold it in, but it came out so he played baseball. His dad was in the Navy though, and so he did not know sure there's a point. There's a down in the Navy though. Okay, he played baseball though. His dad was in the Navy. There's a reason why I said though 03:12 so he did it get to play with one team for a long time in his youth. His dad taught him how to pitch the moved around a lot. um Finally, okay high school hands up in San Diego Navy town. um That's what they call it right, San Diego, San Diego, Navy town where he starts playing. I San Diego is more known for the marine base there Pendleton. I thought it isn't that a Navy base with a marine base really yep. I thought that was a Navy base. Are you serious yep? 03:41 There might be a Navy base there. 03:45 that's the one like right on the shore right and yep marine on coronado. I know because I was in the marine. No, that's a naval base. That is a marie. That's a marine base. No, I'm looking at it right now. It's a navy base right here, naval base on coronado. That is yes, the naval and 04:09 Green Core Base. 04:12 It's got both. Yeah. Okay. 04:18 guys. I need you to listen. I need somebody to reach out to me in my DMS. Send me a message. See like tell me that I'm not crazy. I didn't say they didn't have a Navy base. I said I think they're more known for Camp Pendleton and then you went yeah, that's a Navy base and then you googled it. It wasn't and you were like yes, it is on Coronado. That's not Camp Pendleton. What I said 04:48 So I just need to me an email. It's my email is tim at tillin dot com and just send me an email very detailed about how I'm not an insane person. I just say how much you had that other guy on this part every day man. Our phone calls, our podcast, 05:12 Every morning I wake up to an audio message that says hey good morning you small little man Nothing you think is correct the other day you sent me an audio message You you say you sound tired and you were like hey good morning, man I just want you to know that nothing you think or say is ever right and that every thought you have is wrong And I just want you to second guess yourself all along the way. All right. Anyway, Billy bean. See you later 05:39 That's how you make it funny Tim. 05:44 take note. So Billy goes to San Diego. His dad's the Navy. He's working at the Navy base, not the marine. Yes, but there is a there's both his mom worked at the marine base, but he went to high school because he was a t a soldier and he goes to Mount Carmel High School in San Diego and he and there being a teenage boy in the what would this be? He was born in sixty two, so seventies seventies 06:13 he school doesn't matter. What mattered to him was baseball, football and basketball and cigarettes. uh Yeah, I live for four things. Baseball, football, basketball and cigarettes in reverse order. Last night, 06:32 You're gonna hate me for this. 06:36 last night during fast money five minutes in bringing up family feud. All right, let's hear it last night during failure, failure feud. The grandma of one of the families was doing fast money. The worst fast money round I've ever seen in my life. Yeah, there was a question where it was like what is a part of your body that regenerates hair, skin, skin. She said hips 07:05 And then there was a question, what's the first thing you reach for in the morning? And in this voice she said, cigarettes. 07:16 BUT 07:18 cigarettes was the top answer. She literally got fourteen total points in that fast money round. It was the worst I've ever seen and her son came out and ended up getting the total score to one ninety seven, so he all cleared the gap. Yeah, the gap. It was crazy, but yeah, the first thing you reach for the morning cigarettes oh kills me. I will never forget that moment. Anyways, 07:44 it was just think so relaxing about watching this old lady see cigarettes on tv and see there's something about that that that's funny, but there's decorum to that. You saw that like he's trying to stretch it now. I was looking. I was like okay, that was only a minute and he's like yeah, but also yeah too much too too much. So I'm interested in William Garbon so bean 08:07 So being is playing baseball, football and basketball, yeah and smoking cigs smoking looking cool and so he and he was really talented. He got named to the varsity team as freshman year on all three sports. Okay, he batted a five o one his sophomore and junior year of high school, so he was good um his senior year there. He ended up deciding to drop both football and basketball, which was a controversial decision for him because he was already being scouted by Stanford and they were talking 08:36 about giving him a joint baseball football scholarship to succeed John Elway, who was a sophomore at the time. They're like, we're going to need to replace him in a couple of years. And we think you're our guy. Wow. And so that's like high praise, obviously. uh But he was like, no, he's like, if I play, if I keep playing football, I risk a career ending injury. And he's like, baseball is a safer sport. I feel like I'm better at that game uh because his senior year, his batting average dropped. uh 09:06 to 300 and felt like he was distracted. So he's like, I'm going to focus on baseball. I'm to just pursue that. So he dropped everything else, just pursue baseball um and it paid off. He ended up being the New York Mets first selection and the 1980 major league baseball draft straight out of high school. Okay. So he was a first round draft pick, went to go play for the Mets um and spent four years playing in the minor leagues and then went on to the majors, had one year. It's one of my favorite things to watch. 09:34 the videos or guys getting called up. Oh yeah, yeah, so fun to watch. Yeah, it's yeah, it is fun. So he goes, he got to love watching people's dreams come true. Yeah, it is, you know, it is exciting and it's it's even more exciting watching them get the call that they are getting cut. That is there's nothing better than watching someone's James get slashed. 09:59 I there's nothing I hate more than this bit that you do sometimes where you just decide to not engage with me or you just decide I'm going to make you look crazy this episode and it works every time because I can't stand it so much and it makes me go more crazy, but I can't stand it. All right, that was thirty seconds you can cut out. Oh my God, so he does the year with the Mets the Mets were so he doesn't you with the Mets. He doesn't you with the Mets. 10:29 and the meds are like ah, you batted a two eighty four oof not great. We know we just called you up. We know we spent a first round draft pick on you. It's not hot anymore. You're not that hot. You stop smoking and now you're not cool anymore. Yeah, and so they trade them to the twins. The twins hold them for a year. They do the same thing. They trade him to the tigers. The tigers hold them for a year. They do the same thing. They train him his oh he's 10:51 Is he bouncing around in the minor leagues or he to get this is made so he's okay, so he's in the majors, but he's not getting to stay on it. He at least got to play in the majors exactly. It's a beautiful fun thing yeah, and so he goes to the athletics and he spends a year with the athletics and the athletics are like hey going into nineteen ninety season. We feel like you've lost a step. We're going to downgrade you to the miners and so he goes to the GM Sandy Alderson of uh the open the Oakland A's and he says hey I 11:20 Oh, wait a minute. Okay, I know who Billy Bean is. Keep going. He says, he says, hey, was like, know this name is familiar. He says, Hey, I, I know, like I could go do the minor league thing. Yeah. And he's like, but let's just, let's just cut this middle storyline out. Like I don't need to go to the miners. I can just retire now. And he's like, I'd like to come be a scout. And he says, all right, you got a deal. And so he becomes a scout. 11:48 for the Oakland Athletics. Yeah, and he comes in kind of like a lower level scout. His job is what's called an advanced scout, so he's going to not to high school students, not to colleges, but he's going to the minor leagues and he's scouting for other players and I to a guy on a delta flight that did this. Did he tell you about it? Yeah, I mean like loosely. I mean he was like, you know, I'm a scout for he was for the race. Yeah, they have anybody on his radar that day. 12:15 I was like how you're going to watch somebody and he said no, I'm going vacation my family right now, and so he's like don't talk to me. No, he started the conversation. I think he wanted. I think all he wanted was for me to know he's a scout. You were like you want to see me. I can do some gassers down the aisles. You want to see my job. hey, I'll run right now. I thought I was a catcher. I got a hip flexor issue right now, like my hips are kind of tight, so can't actually fully get into the squat position, but like it's like take off. 12:39 And the flight attendants like, you got to sit down. We're trying to take out my dream. I'm trying out for the right that I yelled off Mike and Tim yelled into it. He doesn't understand my control. He's not very funny. Um, and so he's just really bad at this. We've been podcasting for almost 10 years and I was still hasn't got the hang of it. I'm trying to talk over you is what I'm doing. I'm trying to make it to where my joke is the one that people 13:06 because when you hear this back, when you hear this back, show this to your counselor, ask your counselor to listen to the last two episodes and then be like which one of us is the crazy one is a deal. I've had a crazy day already. It started at like six AM and it hasn't stopped. What happened? Oh, you're not a site go down. Well, I mean that was the sixth thing that happened today and it's just it's been one of those and so I am a little a little high strong. I will, I will admit I'm a little tense. 13:37 anyways, so do that again. I'm a little got some tension in my banks. Thank buddy. What the heck is wrong with you? 14:02 I don't know how else how else would you how else with your body would you try to illustrate the fact that you're tense show me another way you would try to illustrate tension without just flexing 14:16 that does like different. That does look different. You're right. There was another way to do that and you went that was weirder though. I think that was you posted up to your problems like you were like gonna be like yeah, that's how men fight their problems. They fit. you go. So so you think that 14:34 just I sort of make sure that we understand. So you think that addressing your problems in a masculine way yeah, it's gotta be mass is to puff your chest and and tell your pops your force or the was to tell your pops. No tell your problem. Oh, tell your pops. You're the was you're the one you're the weak one. That's a big five ten energy over there buddy. 15:00 Okay, so Billy Bean is a scout for now the Oconais yeah, and so he's working underneath. What year is this? Nineteen okay, and so he's working underneath Sandy Alderson and Sandy is teaching him about this new stuff. That's like it's not really new. This has been around for a little bit called hold on to me the right Saber metrics, S A B R metrics, which stands for Society for American Baseball Research. 15:28 which was 1971. So relatively recent. It's this new way of doing analysis on players that was pretty like groundbreaking, which is weird, where instead of looking at a player and being like, that person's good at baseball, I'm going to offer them a bunch of money to come play for my team. They would look at their stats, right? Be like, these are good stats. This is good on paper. So we know they're a good player. 15:54 but a lot of scouts had a lot of problems with safer metrics because the scouts were like because the scouts were like no, no, no, it's a feeling. It's a vibe. That's guess. We're like I've got a hold, you know, because every player has that gold necklace, that little chain right and they take it off. I hold it in my hand and I go he's like. No, you're not going to make it to the league. I hate when you ruin my bits. I hate when I'm about to do something funny and then you go wow. 16:26 so Billy Bean is a guy who is now working for the Oakland A's. I want to know your version of that bit. I want to tell me your version of that bit. It was. I was going so basically the same yeah, but you went the sound you made is like if oatmeal came to life and was like a monster in the bowl and was like a sloppy monster. 16:55 the sound I made was more like a psychic looking at the thing and trying to go to a different route and be like you will do and I was going to do a whole like I see you playing ball and also you know and I was good. I'm not even going to a punch line. I'm not going to let it. We got to let it flow to the ether because Tim was like wow, wow, wow, because Tim was like you know what's funnier. What if I speak over Jaron 17:24 and I do my bits. You don't know what is funnier is that the psychic so Billy Bean is a guy who works for the Oakland A's and he Oh make my mic louder. He braids cut him out. Take him out of this podcast. You just hear Tim really quiet. 17:47 All right, Saber is a on paper kind of way of looking at things. Yeah, they're evaluating their actual staff. Yeah, of course. Yeah, it's like it's like what do they look at off? So they're looking at pretty much every stat and baseball and what's interesting is those in those early years. They're just like what are all the possible stats we're going to start tracking them and chart start to see what has the most um connection to players who actually succeed right league because what 18:13 happened all the time and it's very interesting. Baseball is different than pretty much every other professional sport. They have a twenty round draft yeah and they just pull in a baseball will draft kids straight out of high school. Yes and instead of letting them to put him in the minor. Yeah they put him in the minors. They let him develop from there but the problem is like what happens so often is they will spin these first few rounds. I love to do like I don't know if it's time in this episode but a side tangent on the way that minor league works because like they're not paid a lot 18:42 Yeah, well, what happens if they get drafted, right, they get drafted, get a signing bonus, they get a lot of stuff, but minor league players don't make a lot of money and they have to pay for a lot of their own stuff. It ends up being like a lot of them have other jobs. Yeah, I don't know exactly how it works in the MLB, but I do know I knew a guy who was in the minor leagues for the NHL and they lived in a team house and so they had a house that was like a frat house essentially. that Andy? No, I don't know if you've met. 19:11 him, but it was like essentially a thing he's made up. I know everybody that Tim knows and Tim's lying right now. I really don't think his name was Nate. I don't think he met him, but it was like a teen house. I really live in this team house. He did have another job. He sold insurance for State Farm. I bought some from him and then and then he would put us in sweets every time he played at cable domer and so 19:39 they definitely weren't making enough like when just that like the NFL cheerleaders make nothing. What did you watch the season of the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders? No, they they campaigned. They got raises and so I think it, I think they, why would I have one minimum salary? Watch that. It's interesting. The minimum salary I think they get now is eighty thousand for the cowboys. Oh well, to be fair though, they're worth it. I was gonna say 20:06 Okay, that's out there. Let me explain. Let me explain. I need to explain. 20:15 Hey, join us on Patreon if you want this to be ad free and also there's a bunch of other perks you get to all episodes are ad free. You get next week's episode right now and you get to do monthly hangouts with me and Tim. Like we really look it's like a virtual just hangout room and we play games together. We talk we have show and tell sometimes we've made a lot of good friends through this and so it's a really good time to do that. So either way please share the episode tell somebody about it. These are all those ways to help us grow the show because we love doing it. We want to keep doing it. So thanks for being here. 20:50 say that. Oh, I love this. My favorite moment of the whole show. Wow, Tim, they provide a lot of value for the team. Oh my gosh, that is the value they provide for their worth. Yeah, I they're worth it. 21:15 that's crazy. No, I meant like they've now spun that like whoever was the marketing director for the cheerleaders of the Dallas Cowboys. That's what I'm saying. They're a brand. Let me finish right. I'm trying to save you right now, buddy. What I said they they became a separate entity exactly that exists alongside the Cowboys ah because of like their Netflix series. They had a TV state, a reality. They were they were their own reality show 21:44 you know, and so they've they're a valuable brand and enough right separate from so now that is the elite. Honestly, you could start on another team yeah and be a cheerleader and then hopefully become a doubt like that's what you want to yeah, but as a process they talked about the process of becoming an NFL cheerleader, at least for the chiefs. I mean I've had a couple friends who have auditioned for it and tried and it's 22:09 pretty aggressive like you have not easy to make and you have to know the entire roster for several years back to you have to know you didn't know a lot of stuff about the chiefs yeah. I mean what's crazy it. I don't know. I don't mean entire roster like all the starting players. You got to know you got nobody every position yeah yeah you know which is crazy. It's crazy because that's not what you do on a day to day basis at all. That's nothing. No, no, no, I mean you will you're too poor to sit close when you sit up front by him 22:37 they're doing this and stuff and you're like hey, who's the back up right tackle and they have to tell you the stats yeah, that's actually their go. Where do you go to high school? You know, do I know him? Are we friends on Facebook? You are so worth it. 22:57 because they're war. I was uh all right supportive yeah, but also they do provide a lot of value. They used to make like thirty thousand a year, which is crazy, so they they pulled a pretty big. I think they made way less than that. Hold on because I don't they're not salary or at least about the chiefs. Yeah, they were hourly. They know they are salary now with benefits. 23:27 the cowboy shoes are yeah, because that was the whole thing in the show is like they all had cheerleaders make you know an average of seventeen thousand a year. They earn a flat rate per game. They were they earn a hundred and fifty per game. Yeah, that's what I saw because because when this happened in practices pay ten to twenty dollars per hour and then public appearances like if they send three cheerleaders out to an event that's like fifty to seventy five dollars. Yeah, I remember looking wow 23:55 because they pay for all their own costs like uh their hair and make up their travel to and from events. No way there's no way they're paying for the flights. Isn't that crazy? Does the visiting team doesn't say so they only do home games and they well local events. We stayed when I was when I was in what year was that? I think I was in fifth grade greatest time of my life because we stayed at the same hotel as the kids, chief cheerleaders 24:22 when we went to see the Hall of Fame game in Canton, Ohio, they play Green Bay Packers nice, so they might travel for games like that. Well, yeah, it's the Hall of Fame game interesting yeah. So we can, I both teams took their cheerleaders to Brazil right. I think so yeah, like big things like that yeah, Super Bowl, Super Bowl, both teams gets cheerleaders obviously yeah and they're worth it. 24:51 and the word that you get what I was trying to say though, right? Yeah, do I need a no, I think you don't gotta explain anything to me, but breathe and breathe doesn't listen to this, so she's not even gonna have any questions. I watched it with her. Your mom might tell her though your mom's gonna be because your mom listens and watches thanks Terry and but she's gonna text breathe like you need to listen to this episode. Go ahead and skip forward a minute forty five, but 25:22 So Billy B, so Billy B, what's that? So they focus on what I'm saying. Like they're, they determine that there's these stats early. Then what were the stats they were focused on? I've got, sure they're batting average, they're so running speed. I'm sure it was what they were. They were trying to focus on all these. I know which stat they have initially ended up like what they ended up going to. Yeah. 25:47 I don't know what Saber Metrics focused on in the early days of Saber Metrics. I know that early on they were like whatever they were looking at all stats, trying to figure out what was the one that actually influenced the ability to win games. Like what stat do you need the most of? But I don't know when they because the way that baseball contracts worked, some of these players like star players were getting incredible amounts of money. Yeah. And so 26:12 And I guess it kind of works the same way with the NFL. I mean, you'd have players making crazy contracts to play third base while your second base, your second baseman is making one 20th of that. Yeah, there's huge, huge discrepancies across the roster. Yeah. Yeah. And it's interesting with baseball too, because even to this day, like you will have contracts that are multimillion dollar contracts for some players in the team and then other players in the team will have six figure contracts. Yeah. And so there is like a 26:42 there's a disparity where, like if you look at a lot of other leagues like the NFL, for example, like played on the NFL, there's they're all still millionaires. They're all still doing really well, but there are some that are doing significantly, definitely exceptionally well yeah and so well, it's like when my homes first when they first won that first Super Bowl and there was a I think it was a video that they were talking about. They were in the locker room or whatever and some of the other guys were like hey. Did you go watch that movie yet? Oh yeah, he was like he's like can't go to movie theaters yeah. 27:10 Yeah, you know and it's just like a different level of like when I was at the Starbucks by my house, there's I don't even know the guy's name, but I know he plays the chiefs because he would walk in and that's there. He's pretty visibly not a normal person. You're like oh yeah, you are a truck and so but he was like I think he was like a defensive lineman coming to Starbucks, drive a pretty nice car, yeah, you know, but no one in there was like oh my gosh, yeah, you know same thing with who was our bald sorenson 27:40 we have a chick flay right a bit, but no one will be like really. I would think people recognize him. I mean I think I think one person working but go because I think that's so you know like I think it would be one of those things like I think that people who know now it's like with his family and like but someone would go. It's not like undeniable. He walks in and you don't go that's sorens. You know we walks in you go. I think that's I was speaking of. I thought of this new bit the other day um 28:11 I haven't got to do this to anybody yet, but I'm really looking forward to it. This is like a nice bit. This is a fun bit to do to your friends. But like when you see your friend in public act like they're a celebrity that no one else in the room knows who they are. so you're just like, Oh my God, is that Alex Garnett? And then you just take, you're like, can you take a picture and get someone to take a picture and be like, you want me to take a picture with them? And then you get like, 28:36 see if you can get a group of strangers to take a picture with your friend who's not famous at all. I love the idea. I haven't got to do it. I think that's funny. My favorite thing to do is if you're at Disney or something, this is uh a a ask someone to take your picture. I told you this one where it's like if you and I were at Disney together, we would go hey sir, would you take our picture and then you and I and I take a picture and you go you should be in this. Well, you 29:01 will you take a picture of us and then get a stranger in the picture with you? That's really I didn't go you should be in this and then just see how many people you can do that to you can. That's really funny. That's really funny. I like that a lot too. Those are two great bits, two great bits you can do yeah. Have some fun. You know another really fun bit is a go audition for the Kansas City Chiefs. They let they let anybody out. They let anybody out. 29:33 uh They can't just I tell you what they can't turn you away. So anyways, while we were doing all these bits, I looked up what cyber metric started out with and it started with batting average. That was yes. They thought was the big one and then eventually they started looking at the correlation between batting average and run scored as a team. Like the whole team's batting average, the whole team's run scored, um but eventually uh they ended up landing on on base percentage. 30:03 So by the time uh Billy Bean became the scout, uh Sandy Alderson was looking for players who had good on base percentages, meaning they got on base a lot because they said this is the thing that correlates to teams being able to win games, uh which is a pretty big change for scouting in the major leagues because like I said before, scouts would go watch high school players play. 30:30 and say this kids got it and it was based on a feeling and a vibe and a lot of times it was not. It didn't pan out because it was vibes yeah and usually these kids were kids that were doing good in high school, but there wasn't like any concrete data behind the fact that they were good. It's just they're doing well. Oh, speaking of kids that do well, uh no, no, no, I got to you this is crazy. Later, I have to tell you now we're not that far in. I do not consent to this story. 31:01 So uh you know, Derek Henry, yeah, if you don't, he's the running back for the Baltimore Ravens. ah This is going to change this season, but he's been in the NFL for nine years. I saw this on another podcast and and then I went and watched so much game footage, ah but he's been in the NFL for nine seasons, okay, and he has just under twelve thousand yards in the NFL from nine seasons. Okay, 31:30 in his four year high school football career. He had twelve thousand one hundred and forty five yards and so he has more seasons in his high school career or more yards in his high school career than he has in nine seasons in the NFL, which is bonkers and you look it up. You look up the stat sheet, Tim. Why is that bonkers? 31:51 Well, okay, okay, because no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, oh 32:16 You're telling me this force of a person gigantic guy. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. That's why he made the league. I would expect it. I would expect it to take someone who is exceptional or than double the time in the league is insane. It's not insane. I think it's insane to every team you're playing has 11 professional athletes on the other side of the ball. When you're in high school, you got 32:40 idiots. He was averaging two hundred and fifty yards a game. There are games in his high school career where he is over five hundred rushing and that's crazy because playing against high schoolers and as a high schooler, he looked forty two. I watched a bunch of game footage of him playing in high school and he's a head and shoulders taller than everybody else in the field. I can't believe he's five hundred yards of these people, but also that's not crazy. After watching a bunch of game footage, I spent 33:10 a couple hours watching game footage of him in high school. After I saw this, I genuinely don't know if he got tackled in high school, like watching this footage like nobody could bring him down. I genuinely don't think he got tackled in high school and I don't got that rose got tackled for the first time. He's man, this sucks. I didn't like that. I do this all the time. You guys like get tackled. Where do you go to college? The worst? I don't know. Actually, let me see 33:42 he went to the University of Alabama. Yeah, that's crazy. That's not that crazy. He the highs in his freshman year. That's crazy. That's nuts. What is psychopath? I mean he really is paid a lot of money and he's worth it. 34:04 Hahaha 34:06 never gonna hear the end of that he's so okay, so so so so see me. messed up on the story here though, because I thought that Billy Bean had to like fight the team to get this to be so sandy. So sandy teaches him this thing yeah and what he teaches them. It's kind of this thing where sandy is doing this as the GEM and when he's looking at players 34:33 but scouts are still doing what scouts do and that's going and watching college or high school and college and mightily players play and just vibing them out yeah and then they tell the GM they say hey. I like the vibe of this guy. The GM was looking at also if you're a travel ball parent like if your kid plays baseball and you travel for that, you should know that college scouts and pro scouts are also watching how the parents act in the stands yeah because like your kid could be really talented, but if I'm a college scout and I see you in the stands, I'm like 35:02 I don't want to put up with you yeah yeah like you could ruin your whole kid's career just by being who you are at these little things. That's actually one hundred percent true and it's crazy. These people are there's nobody worse than a travel ball parent. These people will load their family into the suburban. They'll drive states away for a baseball game, but they won't drive twenty minutes to a counseling appointment. That's true. It's a good joke. That is true. 35:38 So Billy Billy learns all this stuff about Saber Saber metrics from Sandy and he's a scout for Sandy for a few years. And then in 1997, Sandy leaves the athletics and then Billy is offered the job as GM. So he takes the job as GM. 36:01 and he immediately is like, okay, I know this guy who's really good with Saber metrics and stats and stuff like this. He's a total nerd. He's like, I'm to call him up. His name is Paul de Podesta and he's like, I want you to be my assistant GM and he's like, all right, done. And so then he comes and joins the team and then he sits all the scouts down and he says, Hey, no more of whatever you guys are doing. I don't like it. He says, we're only going to do metrics from now on. Okay. And the movie makes it seem like it does. 36:31 and that's not what happened. No, you're saying that saying he was already doing this saying he was already doing okay, but it wasn't. It wasn't. I will say because the movie makes it seem like Jonah Hill brought this to the A's or like that Joe Hill was like. You should be looking at this, which Jonah Hill plays Paul. They put that's what I'm saying, um but yeah same person whatever that's not yeah. That's not what happened. Also did Paul look like John Hill? I wish I could do pictures today. Our computer TV's not working 36:59 No, he does not because Billy Bean got played by Brad Pitt. I will say which is pretty sick. This is here's a here's a picture of them, so they not even close, not even close. There's a lot of a lot of people who like a lot of people who knew this story ahead of the story and were close to the athletics didn't like the movie because it it made a lot of people like a lot of individual people with the team look pretty bad that 37:26 did not look that bad in real life. Well, because the scouts were like we're fighting you on this. We're not going to do it and then Billy Beans like yeah, you're out, you're cut, I'm done. I'm not mess with this stuff. We're doing this system and it seemed like the way that the movie we're referencing is money ball. If you don't know ah and the way the movie portrays this is that Billy Beans, the GM trying to figure out the team sucks, trying to figure out what's going to work and then Paul Despacito or whatever his last name is. What is it day Podesta day Podesta ah 37:56 somehow he and Billy Bean their their paths cross yeah at some office thing or whatever. Well, he's not a play and he finds out he's a scout and he's like you want to see me run down the aisle yeah and then so Paul goes hey you should be looking at the on base percentage and Billy Beans like what he was you should be looking at the on base percentage. That's how what's what's the that's the correlating factor and then Billy Bean goes back to the A's and he's like we got a lot of the on base percentage and then fires the whole staff and brings in this guy 38:26 is what the movie makes it seem like yeah yeah, but yeah, no he had already been looking at it before that holly the guy before him had been looking at it. It's not a compelling story though, and you know what it's kind of like this football movie. I watched where like the kicker's name is David. His dad's in a wheelchair, great story and I'm standing for my son and don't touch me. I'm standing for my son 38:56 and every youth group watched that they're playing the giants at the end. Beautiful, beautiful moment. Yeah. 39:06 Hey, if you love the show, a great way to serve support is by getting some merch. We got lots of great stuff. I'm going to showcase some of it right now. This is like our little till in QVC. You can get a it's not a call. It's a podcast sweatshirt. Very sweet. The nice thing about this is no one knows what podcast you're talking about. So you were in public and you can tell them about your Lord and Savior to a podcast. We also got the this is one of my favorite things we've ever made. The fiddle off fest hoodie. It's got uh the devil. 39:36 playing a fiddle. It's not really the devil's a skeleton. And then all of the bands on the back of it like it's a festival. But spoiler alert, these aren't bands. These are jokes from episodes. So worth checking out. And this is one of my favorite things we've ever done. This is for the real fans. This is an old one. We've got a Tim Stones get well quick trick shirt. And it's very cool. We've got some really good designs. Darren is good at designing stuff. So support his dream. No one will hire him as a designer, but you can by buying his merch. 40:04 It's our merch, but it's his designs. so leave a comment, say, Jared, you're good at this. um We like your art. He really needs it. He needs your support so bad. Please make him feel better about it and buy some merch. It helps make this show keep happening. You can tell people about how much you love this show with it. So. 40:27 Did you hear it? Did you hear what I said? Yeah, you're to do a two minute merch ad. wasn't a two minute merch ad. Oh, Jaren's a good designer. Give him a high five. Make him feel good about his art. 40:42 and then you're going to make them listen to two minutes of ads. We got to do all that and then it's going to be like back to school this fall like 40:52 I don't want to be. I hate skippable ads. They're not skip. They are skippable. Yeah, you too. Pretty you leave all this in that 41:08 that never mind. We don't have to even that movie wasn't that bad. It was their cop movie they did. That was pretty bad. Their fire, their firefighter movie and yeah, there was just so many in that series. They were just so 41:20 christian entertainment's pretty bad yeah. You know yeah and that's it's because here's why is that uh they don't allow you to be funny ah and they also it has to have a message. Otherwise it's not worth it and the standards are really like true. The standards are low, but I would say like I'll do comedy shows that I'll feel like uh 41:43 like I do. I do a serious part of my show, not like a whole like hey come forward and give your life to Christ kind of thing. Yeah, but I do a serious part of my show and there is a certain group of people at my show who will kind of politely laugh through the first thirty minutes of my show. When I do the serious part after that, it's almost like they go oh okay. This had a purpose yeah, you know, it's like where they're like oh okay, it's okay to laugh because this had a point yeah and if you don't do the 42:09 the point it's like it's like that guy in san antonio when we first started, we did the homeless shelter and we did. It was you know is three hundred homeless people. They packed out this whole so they're there for the food and I get up and they didn't know that they allowed a comedian. So I'm joking and these homeless people are like what happened was the director hired us, but he wasn't there that night. That's right. It running it and he did not know that you were a community. He's yes. You were a preacher thought I was a speaker and so and they're all laughing. We're having a really great time. 42:38 and and he goes over to Tim is like what's this guy joking around the whole time and it was very mad like very wise. This guy joking around the whole time and you're like they what he said. He said these people come here to get fed spiritually and physically and I was like oh I was like well he's just he's just joking crazy dude. It was like crazy. This guy was in my face yeah yeah and you're like all right dude we're dumb kids yeah 43:07 but the homeless people are laughing so chill out. I think I literally said that I was like I was like I think that I think they're having a great time. We were having a good time yeah and so anyway, but that's what it so Christian entertainment ends up being like what happens in and ah me and some other Christian creators have had conversations with people to make productions and 43:32 very quickly into the conversation. It very it ends up being the people who fund it wanted to have a certain message. Yeah, they wanted to have a slant. They wanted to be inspirational and what a whole stuff and they end up just making it so it's like oh, I'm shackled by this and like I don't want to veggie tales this story like what do you like? I just want to tell a good story that's worth it and you want it to be like and at the end that we watched the movie at the end you go wow. I feel uplifted. It sucks man and it's just like dude. Just let art 44:02 we are like it's the whole thing of like is it is it valuable if you if you can't turn it upside down and it be Jesus is it still a valuable piece of art yeah anyway drives me nuts yeah. I was if you watch my comedy specials upside down it's it looks like Jesus the whole time crazy. If you could do that with some cool crazy anyway. 44:28 No yeah. I mean I agree with you. We could yeah. We could talk about this more than the the fiddle, because I was actually think about this this morning and I spiraled pretty hard great, so we could talk about that, but you know anyway, so the movie is what I mean. The money ball movie portrayed the story differently than reality is what you're saying yeah yeah absolutely okay like every movie. So then tell us what happened then after although so he gets the job and he calls up Podesta Podesta joins the cheat 44:56 joins the team, he does go to all the scouts and he says, this is what we're to do from now on. Some of the scouts decided to leave because they're like, I want this to go off my vibe. I don't want it to go off of the first. Oh my vibe bro. No, I quit my T I quit my job as a MLB scout just cause I was harsh in my vibe. 45:18 You know, yeah, yeah, exactly. And there was a little bit of scandal about it because what what he did is he he made this decision. This is how they started scouting. Yeah. And then he essentially was like, hey, there's a disparity in the MLB where the teams that have a lot of money to spend, yes, spend a lot of money to go get the best players. Right. And the teams that don't have a lot of money to spend are kind of left with for lack of a better turn the scraps. 45:45 um because they don't have the budget and we're have to compete against each other yeah, but they are. We still have to say it's the same thing of like colleges. If you have a rich college versus the small like the small local college, you know yes, and so he found this on base percentage thing and he said. I think if we assemble a team that has this the highest on base percentage, we could win and we can actually play at a similar level and we can save money. We don't have to pay these guys that much money. It costs us less and then yeah and then we can actually 46:14 a team that has a couple superstars. We have a bunch of decent players. We can come up against a team that's true couple superstars. And so it's the difference between example. You're a running back. 46:29 and the defense has two star players and nine goobers nine. I don't know. High school nerd or you're up against a defense of eleven pretty decent guys. 46:47 I'm pretty sure, and this is going to sound crazy. You might not get as many yards against the 11 pretty decent guys as you would have the two all stars and nine goobers. 47:07 fine, but I will say this. If any one of those nine goobers had the right resources and was born at the right time, the right coaches, the right diet plan from the time they were born, they could have made, they could have, and a sure Derek Henry was a foot and a half taller than all of them, but they could have made it. I think they could have, could they start? Maybe not. Could they be Derek Henry's level? Probably not, but could they make it? 47:37 if you went to a Lutheran high school in Colorado, you too could have twelve thousand rushing yards. They played third graders. We did play the Colorado school, the deaf and blind and we did lose that game. Now you did. Yes, we did. You did what I saw my freshman year, my freshman and sophomore year freshman year. We lost sophomore year. We won junior year. We went up the Colorado stop deaf and blind. Yes, we stopped and you lost. Yeah, we did lose 48:06 My freshman season we lost. Yeah. Sophomore year we beat them and they put us up a division. Can't make any statements about that. 48:18 they only know that's all right. 48:26 that is crazy. It is crazy. It was embarrassing, but we got rid of our coach. Why is it embarrassing? We got rid of a say why it's embarrassing. They can't see us and they're beating us, so they they start scouting with this method, looking for players that have a high on base percentage. They amy, they completely abandon high school kids. They say we're not had a look after high school students anymore because there are too long to 48:55 get to the league. You have to develop them in the minor leagues and that's a waste of our time. What's the minimum age they can go to majors? Do you know there's not a minimum age, but there's a skill level they want to see him get to really? I don't think there's a minimum age. I mean eighteen probably yeah. I wonder what's the youngest in a leaf player is your fun. I was major league baseball. There isn't a strict minimum age. Players have to be seventeen to be eligible to be drafted or signed okay, so so there is a minimum age. 49:24 it's so sure that you all heard that there is an minimum age players had to be seventeen to be eligible. Okay, so seventeen then seventeen sounds like it. Oh wait, wait, wait, so US has to be at least eighteen years old or out of high school. So if they graduate before they're eighteen okay uh international have to be at least seventeen to be eligible for the draft interesting, but a wow and then 49:54 college players, which is interesting. So if they're in college, though, if they go to college instead of be drafted straight out of high school, they have to uh they're eligible after their junior year or when they turn twenty one, whichever comes first, yeah really interesting. So there's like weird, so you either have to commit to not going to college, yeah or you got to commit to going to college, yeah, but inevitably, unless you're just amazing. If you get god, you're going yeah, you're going to the miners, and so he says I'm not going to draft a player that I'm not going to get to use right away. 50:23 I'm not going to use early draft capital on one of those players. I'm going use my early job capital on a player that has a higher likelihood of being a success in the league. Okay, these high school players so often don't pan out. Sometimes they do, but it's a gamble and it's very interesting because so much of the league historically has brought on these high gamble players in those early rounds. Yeah, and then the later rounds are the sure things interest. So he's like we're pushing all the sure things up and we're aiming for players with that specific on base percentage of what we're aiming for. 50:53 Um, and he goes and he clears out the highest salary players trades them away so he could free up cash. So he can go get a ton of these on base percentage players in the draft. And so his draft was deeply ridiculed this season, the, years, he had years where his drafts were ridiculed because his drafts looked like compared to what the league was used to bad drafts. Sure. Um, but over the course of a few years, he started to put together this team that had this high on base percentage. 51:23 because he was able to start getting these players that were at the level where they were ready to go straight into the majors, or had gone to the minor for a couple of years and they went to the majors and then they started to to pan out like they were played like. Obviously some of them ended up being Mrs. Some of them ended up being hits and so he put together this team that was didn't have a ton of stars. There was a couple didn't have a ton of stars was mostly players that were 51:51 good players, not incredible players, but they had this one specific staff that they were great at on base percentage. Okay. And so the 2002 season is when this all kind of came together and they started having a, a really good year and he is getting a lot of flack going into the season. And there's an interview where he responds to it. And I love this quote from him. He says, it's all about evaluating skills and putting a price on them. 30 years ago, stock brokers used to buy stocks strictly by field. 52:19 Let's put it this way. Anyone in the game with a 401k has a choice. You can choose a fund manager who manages the retirement by gut instinct or one that chooses it by research and analysis. I know which way I choose. And so he said, forget it. I'm not just going to guess. I'm going to look at the numbers. Yeah. And I'm to look at a number that we know pants out. And so they put together this team and coming into this season throughout the nineties, the A's had been a mediocre team at best at many years had been a bad team. Right. And they were not known for being 52:48 successful in the eight in the seventies and eighties, they had a few championship runs. They were a team that was a great team, but a new owner bought them in the nineties and said, this costs too much. And so they just slashed their spending and they became a bad team pretty much overnight. And so they go into that 2002 season and it starts out pretty rocky, but over the course of the year, they go on, they end up going on this legendary 20 game winning run, which 53:17 few teams have ever done this in them. And it's interesting if you look at like the records and this is another thing like work of them, I'll be if you look at the record books, they track records from the old National Association. So the last team to cross 20 wins was the St. Louis Maroons in 1884 and also the Providence Grays in the same year in 1884. Both those teams cross 20 wins. And so over a hundred years prior to that was when someone hadn't 53:46 got I done this yeah, so they got the twenty wins, obviously a huge accomplishment and now everyone's like oh, the athletics figured something out and they end up going on to have a hundred wins that season and how many games they play then let ah me look a hundred sixty two. That's the thing about baseball dude. Some people play fantasy baseball and it's like do so stressful. I played one season and it is you to check it twice a day. Yeah, yeah, it is 54:16 Exhausting. Exhausting. And if you forget one day, you're done. 162 games. 54:25 Yeah, it's crazy, uh but it's like if you go in the middle of the season, stadiums are not full because uh you can't sell, but the stadiums are that big for when you get to the end of the season and you're doing well, then there's every game sold out. Every game is yeah full. It's very interesting. It's a very interesting. Yeah, it's a very interesting sport in general. Like it's just so different than every other professional sport. I'm so fascinated by the Samantha Bananas as well. Oh yeah, they crushed it 54:55 so I was in contact with them and do you remember me emailing them in the twenty twenty one and they did a they did Kansas City. They did the monarchs stadium, yep, yep, which is our small, not even minor league. It's a what league is that I think it's minor league. I think it's they're not minor league. They're not affiliated with the they're not like they're not the official minor league. They're not an a team or anything. I thought they were like a triple a they're not a triple a for who for the royals, not for the royals. 55:21 other than monarchs now, I forgot their American Association of Professional Baseball. That's what I'm saying. They're not in the MLB miners. Yeah, you're right. I thought that so it's an MLB partner, but I don't know if it's a partner, but it's not an official. It's not like an a double AAA yeah, and so it's a small baseball stadium is what I'm saying, and the spanna bananas were playing that I had emailed them and was talking with them about like. there anything we can do together that kind of stuff and then end up? got booked that weekend for a show 55:50 So I didn't get to work out with anything. A year later, they're all of sudden huge. And then now here we are a couple of years after that and they're selling out football stadiums, dude. It's wild. Yeah, it's crazy what they were able to do. And it really is like they did, they're doing the Harlem Globetrotter. Yeah, the Globetrotter. it's different because the Harlem Globetrotters is all scripted and it's kind of like the whole thing is like to bring kids onto the field and do all that stuff. They're playing an act, they just made a new game. 56:20 Yeah, they made a baseball adjacent game. Yeah, they made baseball but different, which is interesting because I feel like this has been a thing like they've been changing some rules with baseball to try to make it a faster game to appeal to a younger generation lately. And I feel like they were just like, oh, you're not going far enough. Oh yeah. Banana ball is not. Do you know the rules of banana ball? Do you know about this at all? I know about it, but I've never really like sat down to 56:46 banana ball is a different game. There's only seven innings and then so it like. Let's say that in this inning, one team scores three points. The other team scores two instead of scoreboard reading three to it'll read one zero because that team won the inning gotcha and so that's and the game oh has a time limit on it. If the you know the time limits like two hours right interesting and so if the game's not over by then games over and so they just took out a bunch of like if a fan catches a foul ball, it's an out it counts. 57:15 and so it was just they've done some really yeah fun and also all the tick tock dances and all their stuff. Yeah, they do crazy stuff. I like back on catches and like they do little silly stuff, but like they're developing to the business brain of the stuff they've got a bananas. They got the party animals, they have the firefighters. They're introducing two new teams. They're gonna buy this time next year. They're gonna have six teams that they're having their own league. Yeah, yeah, it's crazy and they're they're they're expanding. Yeah, 57:43 and each of those teams has their own fan base and those games will outsell the average MLB game. It's crazy man, granted the MLB has a lot more well and they they've priced ticket like they've priced tickets and they've capped what they're like. They're not charging insane. Oh really? I didn't know they capped them yeah. They only charge like forty dollars a ticket. That's crazy and he doesn't said he goes. I never wanted to be where he goes. There's because people are saying we're missing out on millions and millions of dollars. He goes. I don't care 58:10 that's crazy. He said he said he's trying to have banana ball fans for fifty years. That's pretty crazy, so it's like yeah. I mean it's pretty crazy. I didn't know that that's interesting and all the game ticket includes the snacks and stuff. All the snacks and drinks and stuff are included in your ticket price. That's really interesting. I didn't know, but their wait list is insane. It's hard to get to a game. I didn't know that that he kept it. That's crazy. It's interesting. Look at maybe we could do a little side episode or a smaller episode on the on Savannah Bannas because 58:38 how they developed that is crazy and it's almost like what you know there's the John Oliver episode where they're talking about the minor league teams and the crazy stuff that minor league teams do to try to get people to come to games. You know yeah, it's very interesting stuff. So anyway, interesting, interesting, interesting. Okay, well, what was I talking about? 58:59 We were talking about how now they're on a legendary run. It's been a hundred years since anyone's done this. Now they've won twenty games in a row. There's a hundred and sixty two games in a season. They went so honestly twenty games in a row. Yeah, you know, is a is a feat, but it's also like you know, they still I don't think they won where it mattered that season right. Well, they won a hundred three games in the year. They won the division title, um but they didn't make it through playoffs right and so they 59:28 they had a winning season. They had a season where they were one of the top teams in the league, but they didn't obviously win it all, but it's still enough for them to end up on the map. And now all of a sudden every team is like, what are you guys doing different? Yeah, because all of a sudden you guys just got really, really good out of nowhere. um And this kind of changed every sport because from this point forward, every sport started looking at advanced analytics. 59:54 right and saying how can we bring numbers into the game towards not just a feeling and we see this in literally every single game now where teams have stopped doing what he said. Let stock brokers used to do where they'd go off just the fides yeah and now it's concrete data to prove whether or not you're a good bet or not, which makes sense because, especially in most of these leagues, they're spending millions on these players and so you're not going to just say right or seem good. 01:00:23 and hope that that pans out. And so he ends up getting an offer at the end of that season, the Red Sox come to him and they say, Hey, we've been bad for a long time. 01:00:38 Why did you say it like that? Hey, we've been bad for a long. 01:00:47 Would you come make us good? 01:00:54 I promise we're worth it. It's like a homecoming proposal. bad for a long time. 01:01:03 Oh, I've been bad for a long time. 01:01:11 Ah. uh 01:01:18 Why did you say it like that? You freaking weirdo. I don't know. Hey, we've been bad for a long time, so so they say, hey, we'll give you twelve and a half million to make us good. I go one season pretty good. How can you not be romantic about twelve and a half million dollars? He ends up turning it down, which is crazy, and he said he said, you know, had I got offered that a few years before that, I would have taken that 01:01:46 But he had recently gone through a divorce and he's like I just want to spend more time with my daughter and he's like I don't want to move across the country ah And so he declined twelve and a half million dollars for his daughter Which seemed to have been a bad decision because the A's moved anyway 01:02:03 No, so he stayed and he stuck around as the general manager in twenty until twenty twelve and he got promoted eventually to be the executive vp of baseball operations of baseball. He be of baseball. Yeah, I work at baseball. 01:02:26 the VP of baseball. Yeah. And so, and he ended up getting an ownership stake in the company or company, the team. And then the athletics ended up purchasing the San Jose earthquakes, which is the major league soccer team out there. And they gave him a percentage share of that to do the same thing for them. And then Arsenal, the soccer team called him because they were like, Hey, we saw what you did. Could you do that for us? And so he became a consultant. 01:02:55 and they're like great job. We're going to give you a percentage there of what we've got um and then Dutch Soccer Club did the same thing and he got to share that company. So he's became essentially like a consultant yeah and then net suite in two thousand seven the software company put him on the board of directors because they were like we like the way you think okay and and then so he's very rich in two thousand three Michael Lewis wrote a book about that two thousand two season called money ball yeah and it kind of 01:03:24 outlined the whole method and how that worked and then that got made into a movie in two thousand and eleven, starting brad pit and it has been named a top hundred movie by a lot of lists. It's a great movie. It's a really good movie. It's a very good movie, not accurate, but it's a good movie. Yeah, it's close. There's some inaccuracies, but it's close. It's a great movie though. So obviously he made money off of the movie in the book. He got a ton of consulting gigs teaching other teams how to do this and 01:03:54 It's very interesting to see here is a guy who went pro at baseball, didn't have the best baseball career, and he really was emblematic of this issue. He was drafted highly in high school because he was a great high school player, did not pan out in the league. Sure. He had this chance. The athletics were basically like, we're going to downgrade you to the minors. You could develop back into the majors. And so he had this opportunity where it was kind of this life crossroads of 01:04:22 do I try to get back to the majors and extend my baseball playing career or do I try to make something else out of my life and he decided to pivot and that pivot ended up making him so much more money than he would have had if he tried to stay in the league because yeah and have the chops, but even if he did, he probably still made more money doing this method than he did. He would have as a pro because he got all these ownership stakes in all these teams. That's very crazy and so it's just interesting to see situations like this where you know sometimes 01:04:52 your life goes out of crossroads and you got to make a choice. Sometimes the choice that seems like the better choice is the worst choice. 01:05:01 Okay, yeah, which is why the show is ending. I'm pivoting that's crazy. Yeah, so it's crazy. The life of the Billy Bean, you will fiddle off then as crazy. Hey, thanks for watching this episode. Please share it. It really helps our show grow, and if you like this episode, you should check out Jose Canseco. It'll help you look at the time in the league when it was the best when uh 01:05:30 what's that called? Steroids? We're just prevalent and everyone was juicing and it was just a great time for the MLB. So check that episode out. ah If you like the show again, support us on Patreon. We'll see you next week for that episode of Things Happened Last Night.


When most people think of baseball legends, they imagine home runs, golden gloves, and towering trophies. But Billy Beane became a legend not because of his swing—but because of his brain. The story behind Moneyball shows how one man’s data-driven strategy forever changed how baseball teams build winning rosters. From Pro Prospect to Front Office Visionary Born in 1962 in … Read More

How Aldi’s Founder Got Kidnapped

10-14-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of Teo Albrecht? Pretty sure it's pronounced Theo. I thought it was Theo, but I don't know no Theo, Teo Teo Teo Teo. I think it's Teo Albrecht, Teo Albrecht. He is a German. He was born in 1922, March 1922, okay, him and his brother, uh his brother. His name is Carl. Let me see. I don't know when Carl was born. I don't know if they're twins or if they're just brothers. 00:29 No, he's the older brother. He's born in 1920, which makes some sense. Actually, now that I think about it, that makes sense thing by the story. Yeah, that does make a little bit. I agree. Yeah, you know what I did yesterday. No, you don't get to roll in, start this late of our recording and then be like, you know what I did yesterday? I don't. I want know what you did this morning because it's now it is the afternoon we were supposed to start recording. We were supposed to start recording an hour ago. We were not supposed to start 00:59 hour ago. Okay, me and Alex disagree. So what did you do yesterday? Oh yeah, last night, Bri and I, watched, we watched family feud on just 01:15 This is not worth it already. I no, is not is me and my wife. We watched family feud. You know we own a home or a couple. We have a kid now. We we watch the family feud. The best thing about family feud is that right after family feuds over it's finding big foot is on. I know the programming it's family feud. Steve Harvey. Yeah, that's the best one horses. Steve Harvey. No. So we watched fairly feud just on like 01:44 we don't even have cable anymore. So it was literally like we have the bunny ears and so we just like over the air family feud from basic tv like air. Okay and it's been ages honestly probably five years at the minimum that i've watched tv just like actual tv not like a streaming platform sure and there was something about it and i don't know if this is nostalgia or if this is genuinely different but it was more relaxing to just turn it on and be like this is what's on 02:14 and then they'll just like sit there and then they ended it and be like what's next and then it's like oh more of this and then it just kept doing that like I don't know. Do you think that the soldier do think there's something to that of like I didn't have to go find what I was going to watch? I just turned it on and it was there. That's interesting. I think that's why the for you page is successful. Yeah, 02:36 Huh, that is interesting. was, I felt much more relaxed at end of the night. I also noticed that. 02:43 So I like the nostalgia that you're reaching for is still TV. You know, I'm saying like it's not like, man, we used to just sit by a babbling brook and listening to the calming waters to go and you're like, yeah, I actually really like that. It's like, you know, that commercial for what's that service where you can send your poop off and it comes back and like, you don't have colon cancer. You're good. What's that service called? That's so nostalgic. What's that service called? I don't know. I thought you'd know. I thought you'd just watch it. 03:13 email. Sure, colon flicks. I don't know, but also I noticed what's really interesting about this show to feel like the Internet broke it because family feud. Yeah, it's very evident and I think we've talked about this before, but it's very evident that so much of the questions that they asked are just trying to get clips for social because it's like, this is going to elicit like funny answers that people are going to say usually for on she and not family friendly. 03:42 answers in family feud. uh Okay, but I've just been thinking about and I and I think that Steve Harvey though. I don't know if that's I don't think it is because I remember is Steve the writer well, I so I dated a girl in two thousand twelve thousand thirteen. We were in college yeah and that's one of the things that we would do is we would go to my parents house and we were watched family feud. My parents would go to bed at nine family food started at nine, so that was like our 04:11 30 minutes of just us in the living room hanging out. That's great. uh Your parents are bed at nine. My parents still go to bed at nine, dude. That's crazy. Now my dad wakes up, works hard for his money. Yeah, I know. What time does your dad wake up? My dad wakes up at 330 in the morning. Same. And he gets grinded on some subway toasters. know? I got to bed at 1 AM. I wake up at 330 AM. And he'll see me. 04:38 complain. got a bed at one a.m. I wake up at one fifteen a.m. I'm already ahead of you. I'm a week ahead weekend by the time you wake. Yeah, you wake up. I've already lived three lifetimes three lives. No, but it's just it just feels like and I don't think it's Steve Harvey because it's it's the questions the quest. I understand what you're saying, but I'm saying I think when they decided to take a more comedic approach 05:02 I think that's yeah. I think it's a lot of the clips you see on social media are from old episodes. I don't think they're engineered. You didn't watch a new episode of family few. They still filming it. Yes, yes, they were. I don't think of that. They were these were they. I don't know if they were brand new episodes, but they were episodes that were recent enough because I could tell by like the celebrities that they had on. I was so ever do family. Oh, you left that detail out. You left that detail out 05:28 but I could tell like hey, should we try to get on family for you? Because what is it? It's like four people right four or five four or five five. It's five people. Yeah, okay. Well, there's three of us. Okay, so close. Wait a minute. What if we did? What if we did me, you, Alex, Alex has to wear a bag over his head and then you want to try to ask the ninjas guys if they would do with us. Yeah, yeah, 05:58 There's five. There's five. Hey, Andy and Josh, if you want to go on family feud, text me back. Next, I'm going to text you right now. And I'm assuming you didn't text him right now. I'm assuming you just haven't texted back Andy, but are listening to this episode. We should try to get on family together. No context, no lead in, no lead in just 06:27 Hey, just found out they're still filming family feud. We should do it. I do it, but here's the thing. Like a lot of those shows, this is such a long tangent and that's not worth it because you're talking about celebrity family feud and I'm just not going to listen to you anymore. How about that? So you're like, oh, here's something that's worth wasting time on. You took five minutes to do it. You started a time. It's I took five minutes. You got time around the wall, so I can see about emailing people or texting people. I don't know. 06:56 I just think I just here's the here's the thing I feel there's no more things. I've there's no more things. It's just weird to be here. You tried to go shut up, up, shut up, stop. Thank you. You did a thing where you were like okay, it's more relaxing. All right, that's one point that you've made about failing feud and then you were like also. I think it's in here for social media. That's a second point. You've made about family viewed. Yeah, I you're trying to draw two thesis. I'm not no 07:26 you dropped it a thesis. You dropped it a thesis. I'm tell too many thesis. I would like to move on. We're done with your thesis. I would like to move on. No, but this is the real point. This is the real point I had. This is the one I actually wanted to talk about third thesis. No, this is part of the second. Go ahead. You just haven't let me finish the second. The second thesis is not done. There was a couple of jokes that were said okay that I think 07:56 Any time pre 2010, the producers would have been like, we got to cut that. But they let it go. And I do think it's because, oh, that's going to go viral. And so now the producers see this type of stuff and they're like, oh, sweet, this is gold because they know it's going to go viral. And I just feel like and I can't believe I'm saying this because this makes me feel like such a old foggy, but 08:25 but I'm just like what happened to the core? Like what happened to like to just being like yeah, we don't want to lose her. Oh, what happened to being appropriate? You know what I love about my favorite about family feud is that is that Steve Harvey wears a suit. How about that? What happened to people dressing up in suits and ties? I just I just happened to decorum, huh? 08:53 I just feel like there was everything on social media is just so inappropriate and bad and you know what and now they've tainted family feud. That's my third thesis. Here's the problem. It's not that it's not that it's raunchy. It's not that I think it's an appropriate. It's that it's raunchy and inappropriate for the sole fact that it will do numbers on social media. It's there was a point where it was like how we can't do that. That's not okay. We can't just put that out there in the world. That was a thousand inappropriate thing to do, but now it's like 09:23 oh we can do this inappropriate thing and we can do a lot of numbers on social media. So we're going to do it anyways. What I'm saying is that they were doing it. I don't think they were. I can't, I can't repeat what was in this episode yesterday, but there's a couple of things in this episode that I'm like, I cannot believe that this was in family feud and they just ran it. Okay, 09:47 I'm not gonna argue with you. I already told you I've been a I've been a I've been part of the family for a while. That's what they call my I'm telling you I've been watching the show. We used to I mean we used to watch it every night that I hung out with that girl. I know there was times where they would let these little jokes slide through, but every question there is change a thing and you know what Tim and here's what makes me so mad dude is that it's one of those things where it's like 10:14 you refuse to not argue about something man, and it makes me feel crazy. If I say something, your brain, I told you just heard it. If I say something, your brain goes nope. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's not what happens. You're wrong about that. Let me tell you ten minutes, Tim. You spent on family view, dude. I've been trying to move on for four minutes. You have 10:44 you've just you you fine. Whatever I have got you heard it. You can talk about you listen to this later. How about you? How about you show this last ten minutes to your counselor this week and be like why am I so hostile? Ask your counselor that I can tell you why I'm so I know exactly why most say I go hey, here's a thing and you go no, that's not true. I know that I know that I'm doing it right now by saying that, but that's not true. 11:13 Tim, I know how crazy it is that right now I'm saying no to that okay, but okay buddy. I want to talk about this tail guy or whatever. We don't have to talk about family. We guys just a lack of decorum in this country, but fine. Let's talk about tail outbreak. The German guy sure all right, so this guy was born in Germany in a time. I saw a clip the other day and I just couldn't imagine. It was like wow. This is crazy. The day is all how 11:43 inappropriate stuff like this to be said on Judge Judy, because like it used to be dude. These reality shows used to be primo family friendly. You know, no above approach. Nobody said anything inappropriate. I never said that they were above approach. 12:09 Tim, I've been trying to move on man. I came into this building with a blood pressure of two ten today and and how often are you measuring your blood pressure? Let's just do the episode. Let's start over now. Okay, so this was a great after the You can access everything that we just said. Oh, you hate this in the live episode Robert. All right, that 12:32 Well, that's what I'll do. I'm gonna kidnap the founder of Aldi. Tim... Why did we do so many bits on a story that's interesting? Quit doing this to me, bro. When you start an episode with a 10-minute stupid tangent and then you go, I'm gonna kidnap the founder of Aldi... Things I learned last night. 13:03 tail a man tail outbreak tail. He's a German guy. You see how you could just straight up cut that from the hey man right. No, you cannot. This is a board conversation. I just need audio listeners to hear that I'm trying. No, you're not. I need video watchers to see 13:28 we know how to get back at this story. I don't either. That's why I say we should start over now. So they'll tell in his family in a mood today. I am in a mood today. We agreed and that it's 13:46 Okay, you don't even to hold on, my hands are long. Why are you doing this? Okay, are we just gonna? All right. 14:03 tail outbreak that his family were born in Germany. I don't know where his parents were, but his brother was in Germany with him okay and his parents owned a grocery store. 14:13 I had stories I wanted to tell today in this podcast that I now I'm like I'm a save him for later because like you just wasted. It's like a family. This podcast is us wasting time on stuff. It's not worth people's time. I was like I was going to talk about my trip to Greece, but I had to Greece for a day. No talk about it, but let me talk about Tia for a little bit and then you can spend ten minutes on my Teo. So this is crazy. 14:37 His family owned a grocery store. was a local little grocery store. This was the 20s when grocery stores were like, you can get three things and you can't pick them out yourself. The grocery store person has to pick them out for you. Is that Oh yeah. Did you not know that? No. used to be. Okay. Grocery stores used to be very highly specialized. And so your grocery stores were, this is your butcher. This is your deli. This is where you get your vegetables, is where you get your general dry goods. And you would go to each of those different stores and you'd walk in there and there'd be a counter and you would tell him what you wanted. And then the counter guy would... 15:07 walk around and grab all this stuff from behind the counter and then give you all this stuff and then check you out. Or they had like an interesting form of like credit to where like they would add it to like a tab and you'd have a tab at the grocery store and then you go pay your grocery bill once a month. And so, and you'd go to all of these different stores and do this. I don't know if this is how it went in Germany, but I know for the States. Sure, sure, sure. And so in Germany, this is 1920s, thirties, parents had this grocery store and then obviously the war happened. 15:36 and Germany was just flattened. so his, their store was severely damaged, but wasn't completely destroyed. So they got to maintain the store. They were able to like ah build it back up, open it back up and they, the war was, or I would, should say the bounce back from the war was a opportune time. 16:04 for Teo and his brother, because they took over the store, him and his brother Carl, and they realized, okay, everybody's struggling right now. Half of our country got flattened, we lost the What year is this now? This is post-World War II. Okay, so 46. Right after, yeah, So yeah, 45, 46, something like that. And so they realized. He's early 20s. Yeah, they've taken over the grocery store and they realize, oh, everybody's struggling, nobody can afford to live. 16:33 And so they said, what if we have a handful of groceries that we sell that we expect to make a profit on? But then we have butter and we sell butter at cost ah because butter is really tough to get your hands on. And so because they chose to do that, they quickly became the prominent grocery store in their town because nobody could get better. had a loss leader. 16:55 Exactly yes and they were one of the first, don't know what a loss leader is. If you're like a little you know dumb person and you're like let, let us the business professionals explain to you yeah and also because we're white men. Let me explain this to you. Exactly a loss leader is how do I even put this in the way 17:16 No, but they I don't want to say they invent. It's like the Costco chicken. I hate when people are like you're the Costco chickens, a loss leader. Shut up. You know I'm talking about they were they were one of the first people to have a loss leader in the business. Yeah, we got to get. We got to keep it moving. I want to your right. Thanks for pushing along. Yeah, we do any bits about the Costco chicken. We got to give them a man. It's dumb thing. That is a report. Keep going. So they were one of the first people to come up with having a loss leader. 17:46 I don't know if they were the I don't think so. Yeah, I mean very, very for a long long yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, 18:15 twins because Carl got his name on the door, so it was the carl albrecht store. Okay, later they change it to all brecht discount store when they opened up multiple locations. Yeah, and so they started spreading and this is all in Germany. Yeah, this is in Germany, specific to like their little district and their little province that they're in sure, but over time throughout the fifties and into the sixties, they began expanding outside of just Germany into and crossing all over 18:45 um Europe. And as they did that, um their stores, ah they had the Albrecht discount store brand bought up. um I think I think they're called Hoffman or I don't know how to how to pronounce it. They bought up a whole series of grocery stores that made them the largest grocery store chain in Europe. And then they rebranded their company to Aldi. um Oh, and so at by 19:18 By 1970, had just opened a couple stores in the US. They were all over Europe. They were the largest in Europe. They were doing two billion in revenue a year, and that's German marks. Wow. Andy text me back. What did say? He said, that's an insanely good idea. I think isn't Family Food in... 19:43 Don't they film that in Orlando or do they film that in LA? 19:50 we could tell we could reach out to the ah we could reach out to family feud and say hey we've got an idea we want to do a podcasters episode it could be us versus Rogan and his guys. I'm legitimately going to have my agent reach out to family like you're kind of joking but I'm like oh now I have an agent that can reach out to family if you'd be like hey we'd love to do this because here's the thing about those shows like 20:16 uh You know, if you remember Haley and Al from our wedding, they were on divorce court. They're not married. Never. Well, no, wait, they're married now. They are now. Sorry, they weren't married. They weren't married when they went on. My bad. They weren't married. uh And because it's just actors. They just made up a story and then they went on to divorce court. I would love if you see me and my wife on divorce court. We're fine. Yeah, it's a joke. It's a bit. 20:42 It's really funny, but where's the decorum? You and I should go on divorce. No, no. Well, is he still doing it? Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. What are you talking about? Like one those, one of those other judge shows? Yeah. Judge Steve Harvey is Steve Harvey's Steve. So can we just do a run on all of Steve Harvey's shows? The Steve Harvey tour. 21:11 All right, I'm literally flying from this to Nashville to meet with my agent this week and like we're going over back. are your goals? I'm like number one anything Steve Harvey does? I want to be on it. I want to be on all of Steve's things. Yeah, get me with Steve. Yeah, I want to be Steve's new pet peeve. Make me Steve's pet peeve. Yeah, this is twenty two minutes, buddy. Let's go 21:38 So I did the math and I'm going to be honest with you. don't know if this is why did you say that? makes me so mad. That makes me so mad. 21:52 I hate that joke you uh 22:02 No 22:05 so on the cruise the other night. It was the PG show, which is family friendly. Here's the thing about this cruise. We know what PG means. Okay, she is 22:21 tell your story. Okay, so so I'm doing the PG show. It's family friendly and the whole line. You're going to hear why I said that the thing about a twelve day Mediterranean cruise of which I only did three days. Yeah, is that people don't bring their kids on those yeah on the whole cruise. There's like there's you know fifteen hundred passengers. They had they call them junior cruisers, eighteen of them. 22:46 Oh my gosh, eighty that's your cruises on this. There was no kids on this thing yeah yeah yeah, so the PG shows were like no, no one shows up to those yeah except for the old people who were like I don't ever want to hear a cuss word or I'm going to die yeah. What happened to decorum? So carnival you have decorum and then they started letting these cussers on and uh you know so anyway, cruise ship more like cuss ship, so that's them and they suck. 23:16 you know, I threw one of them over and uh so she couldn't fight back. She's too old to fight. What's she gonna do about it? So anyway, so there were three high school girls who sat front row and they were the only people laughing at this show. When I tell you that they don't set us up for success on these cruises, they gave me the seven PM show 23:44 back on boat is 630 PM, which means everyone was in Italy. I was in Italy all day in the sun, hiking, doing all the stuff right, getting back on the boat by 630. No one's going to the seven o'clock show and they put us in the big theater, which is 1500 seats and I'm telling you less than a hundred people are at the show. So it was very rough, but three high school girls sat very front row. Yeah, and I was joking around with them doing jokes. They were laughing 24:08 and and they were laughing a little too hard at some jokes where, like then I was looking at the other audience members and I said, I said you know what forget all y'all I'm here for the high school girl and then it was one of those things where I was like ah wait a minute. 24:24 I said because I think about how hard I just laughed at my own stupid joke. This is the hardest that we all started laughing when I was like don't put that on the comment cards. Please no one say that form ago. Jaren said that he was glad the high school girls were at the show. We were crying laughing. I was it was one of those things where like there was no intended bit, but I was crying laughing on stage and it was the thing where we couldn't recover the last ten minutes. The show was us just goofing around being like that. Please don't fill out the 24:54 I love that. Could you imagine though, if you guys did fill out the comic, I would get you. Imagine though, could you imagine, if you did, that's so funny. Well, anyway, okay, I was just laughing really hard on stage at that. Yeah. And I was laughing really hard at me going, you just don't hate. Do you told that joke? But I don't know why I was so funny. Okay, so five minutes. 25:23 He didn't put up his clock in the studio so I can see how long we were recording and I think he did it to try to get me to speed up a little bit, but then he spent ten minutes on family feud, so I feel like I had to sneak in. Well, I've always had a time or story on my computer yeah, but I don't use it, so I thought if it was where I could see it, then I would use it. So I did the math. I don't know how accurate this math is yeah, no promises because they were doing two billion top line revenue in a deutch marks in nineteen seventy. 25:53 The problem is sounds made up. The problem is that's obviously not US dollars, so all your calculation calculators are US dollar, so I converted that to for from doish mark to US dollar in nineteen seventy. Not sure how accurate the source I had on that was and then I'd inflation calculated it so roughly adjusted for inflation. They were doing fifty billion in revenue wow compared to what we know, so they were there US dollars US dollars yeah, so they're doing well. 26:21 is that that's what I want you to understand. I mean, even if I just told you two billion, you're doing well, see this thing, the Larry thing yesterday, speaking of fifty billion dollars. What world do we live in? That's crazy. What okay? What are you? What do you say Larry Ellison became the richest man? Oh yes, at least for a minute. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because well, did you see the way was a crazy dude? Was it him or was it Peter that text that came out? I don't like the name Peter 26:48 to be honest, because the way you said it just first of all, it only reminds me of a homeward bound where the the dying dog is like Peter. So every time I hear that name, you just you landed the are so hard on it. Peter, where you go, is it him or Peter and it's just like uses last name teal teal yeah, did or as we call him the dark sith lord. 27:17 just freaking. Is that correct? I yeah, I think that's accurate. I don't know if I I'm not sure if it was a l or but it was musk. The this type, call him Ellen Ellen text when he was buying Twitter and was like. Hey, do want to get in on this? Did you see this text? I can't remember if it was a listen or teal. I don't remember is one of the two musk reached out to one of them. Yeah, texted them as they responded leaked and he was like he was like how much to get in on it and he was like 27:46 Oh, uh how's 50 sound? And he was like, yeah, that sounds good. And he was like, just in a text thread, just like, yeah, I throw 50 billion in that deal. That's crazy. That's crazy that you're just texting someone and be like, I put 50 up for that. 28:12 my grandma's car got hit at the storage unit and I'm not going to get it fixed because it'll be like five hundred dollars and I'm like I don't want to do that. I'm glad you brought that up because on the way in I hit the other the other side. Honestly, I kind of want to I thought here's what I did realize when I when I got there today though as I realized because they haven't repainted the lines. They repaved the whole unit, but they read I'm park further back than I was supposed to be, but like 28:39 still someone hit my car and left and the storage unit was like we can't figure out who did it. It happened in a four hour window on a specific day. We have a gate log and two security cameras. Your car is not on either of the cameras, but we do with two entryways with cameras on them like it's a very obvious and there's actually one of the intro is broken. So only one word you could watch one camera for a couple hours and very easily figure that out. She's given me a run around which feels like she did it. She did it. Yeah, for sure she did it. I think she hit my car 29:08 horse. I think the storage manager hit my car and you know what I'm fine accusing her of that all right, so so they're doing really well right is that's what I'm trying fifty four minutes Tim. I can't believe we had to cut out this twenty minute tangent. You just did that's insane fifty four minutes buddy. Tim just went on those wild rant about how he does it. He's like speaking of groceries, 29:35 Isn't it crazy that Walmart's prices change and you're like yeah dude that's how inflation works. That's how the economy happens. He goes no no no no Arizona T's been ninety nine cents the whole time. I'm trying to give you the AI recap version. Yeah he just did 20 minutes on how Steve Harvey should be the next president. 29:53 I can't believe this man. Okay, I'm so mad fifty five minutes, so there was also this guy by the name of Heinz Joe, a Kim Ollenberg, another German yeah who he he was an interesting guy a little bit about him. He say it again Hans Heinz Joe, a Kim Ollenberg, okay. uh He was an interesting guy because he was a lawyer, but you wouldn't use the word good 30:23 before lawyer when you described him uh because he was a lawyer. Okay, he was he he was not qualified to be a lawyer. He actually forged a high school diploma to get into law school, uh which is a great start, really good start. Yeah, and somehow I don't know how I did it, and I'm gonna I'm gonna bet that he didn't actually finish law school either, but I guess he did. 30:52 okay. Somehow he skated through law school, got a degree, opened up a firm, but he did not have a good reputation at the firm sure. So most of the people he worked with were criminals were the type of people that he ended up working with, because they were the only people who were willing to work with such a bad lawyer. ah He also had a little bit of a gambling problem ah and he normally he was described by friends as strangely lucky except for one day. ah 31:22 one day he lost three hundred thousand dollars gambling, which is a lot to some most to the poor, not to me, a rich and uh he he borrowed that three hundred thousand dollars from his girlfriend, which crazy crazy to make up for that, but then he was like he's like I'm gonna have to I'm gonna pay you back. 31:47 but he kind had this list of people he owed debts to at this point. his ponsies, he's giving himself and including his girlfriend. It's a trap. He also has like four girlfriends and they're also all 30 years younger than him. So he's so hold on. He's got a girlfriend 30 years younger than him who has capital. Yeah. So he's a lawyer. He's, he's trying to live the high society life, but he's, he doesn't have the money for it. And so he is, he's taking on these. Yeah. But what I'm saying is his girlfriend is 30 years younger than him and has 300,000. 32:16 Yes. Yeah. 32:20 what she in her twenty's thirties yeah she's in her twenty's so her dad's yeah, okay, um but I don't know she could have made her own money. I'm not trying to be. I mean listen, it's nineteen seventy Germany, she did doubtful. Is her dad it's possible, maybe highly doubtful, um so he calls up his friend one day. 32:47 his friend's name is Paul Cron Cron was um and I friend is probably too strong of a term. A guy he's represented in court a couple times, okay, uh who he's a convicted criminal, obviously his job or I guess I shouldn't say job crime of choice. His crime of choice was safe cracking. He had done that for a while. Yeah, he didn't make enough people used to just keep stuff in safe. Yeah, and he was the guy that we've said that so many times, like when you were used to be a rich person, people could just rob you. 33:17 Yeah, and he would. He was the guy who would go in with the group of people robbing you and he'd have the stethoscope and he'd listen and he'd people back. Are you a doctor and he'd be like something like that, call himself the doctor sick, so sick, and so he was the safe guy and so he would break into the safes and get all the stuff he had been arrested. He'd gone to jail a couple times. Sounds pretty dangerous to me, but he was now working as a mechanic. So fifty seven minutes got to keep rolling. 33:46 the timer is not a fifty seven. It's for the record. Jair is just making up these numbers. What do you why do you argue everything I say dude? 34:00 Okay, keep going. Okay, so... 34:05 Hey, thanks for watching our show. you like it, a great way to help out is by being a Patreon supporter. Doing that helps make this show possible, but it also gets a lot of perks for you. You can get every episode a week early ad free. You get access to a Discord where you can meet a lot of other people who love the show and actually hang out with Jaren and I every month on a hangout. And we're also in that Discord chat all the time, hanging, talking with people, talking about episodes and just random stuff in life. It's super fun. 34:28 We do, there's a way to get birthday messages, a free gift, merch discounts in there. So there's a lot of really great reasons to be a Patreon supporter. You get a lot of benefits out of it. And it also makes the show keep happening. So if that sounds great to you, you can go to support.tilling.com or tilling.com slash support, uh or just tilling.com and search around until you find the links and become a Patreon supporter. really appreciate you doing that. But if not, right back to the episode, right? 34:56 This guy, he... 35:04 What? Just freaking do it in the mic. If you're going to do it, just do it into the mic. do it in the mic. do in the mic. Just do your bit in the mic so people can actually hear it. I don't think people can hear that. It's too quiet. He's going to have to do all this post-processing your dumb little bit. 35:21 I'm not 35:24 Like, just go! 35:29 Can I have one of those though one of what fruit stacks you're opening up under the table right now? Show me your other hand. 35:38 What are you talking about? Okay, so this is where they in. 35:59 Okay. You put it on the seat. It's my phone. Okay. uh 36:11 him. That's my phone. I don't stop doing the phone, but I know it's there for there. Okay, an hour and two minutes. Come on buddy, do the podcast. So this guy he he got out of prison. He was being represented. He's been represented by Olin Berg a few times and 36:41 this guy, Paul Cron, he got a job as a mechanic, but he, after one of his big scores, he bought this plot of land, it was right on the lake, and he had this dream of building this dream home on this land, but he is making less than $2,000 a month. 37:02 He does slowly. You did that. I'm a joke. Okay, are you good as his dream of building this dream home on the property, but he's not. He doesn't make enough money to build a home. He doesn't make enough money to buy a home and so he's like he's like I need one. Oh, speaking of this man, sorry, this is an actual time. This is an actual danger. We my neighbor 37:32 Fred, we've talked a lot about, you know, they're our neighbors for life. we move, they move. This is a good idea. He wants us to rent a house together. Yeah. And so he, he scheduled a tour of this house that he found on Zillow. $9,500 a month is the rent, but it has a main house that has five bedrooms. And then it has like a second house in the back. It's a one bedroom little ranch style, like a mother-in-law quarters type house. And so he's found this $9,500 a month. They call them next gen suites now. 38:00 Is that what they're called? Yeah, because it's for your kids because your kids can't afford to move out anymore. Woof. Yeah, isn't that great? Sucks. which is unfortunately the future. Like we're going to have to have multi-generational homes. but this house was built by the people who... So apparently the small house was the main house and then this couple built this house for their growing family and it's this oval. The floor plan doesn't make any sense, but it's... 38:28 incredible. It was built at the six, the the sixties or fifties and so like the stairs, two sets of staircase go past each other. Oh yeah, yeah, it's like inside the house is beautiful. It's like like that mid century moderns. It for sure needs renovated. Yeah, you know, it needs some updating, but it's like the floor plan is incredible and uh and Reagan's like oh my gosh, this house is like there's no house. There's no house like this. This is a one of one. No other house looks like this kind of thing right. 38:56 the utilities. you guys wait? Did you actually go do the tour? We went and did the well. The realtor wasn't really there. The back door was wide open crazy, so we just explore the house, but it was a big house and it was pretty you know, pretty pleasant and then the realtor shows up and and this is like what are you doing here? I actually feel bad because I don't think Fred realized that my neighbor, I you know it's like we're wasting this guy's time because like we're probably not going to this yeah you know and whatever. If it was an open house sure, but he 39:25 schedule an appointment. don't know. I didn't like it anyway. So realtor shows up and then I didn't care because the realtor was like, yeah, we're actually looking for a short term 12 to 18 months because the person bought it, bought the property. He's going to tear both houses down and build a bigger mansion here. My God. As soon as you said that, Reagan went, all right. I wanted to leave because like you're going to tear down a house that has character and is beautiful and nice to put up a square mansion. Yeah, that's like a huge giant house. Yeah, that sucks. 39:53 I'm so sick of house slippers. I'm really tired because like you're going to buy a house, you're going to spend $30,000 to take any kind of character. All the stuff that's put in in the sixties, you're going to take out the tile, you're going to do all the, you're to put in crappy stuff. And then you're going to list it for $120,000 more to make a return on your investment. Then I'm have to buy this for an inflated price. 40:18 that I take out all the stuff you put on another $50,000 to undo the crap you did. That sucks. Yeah, I would love to be able to buy a home and spend my parents bought a home in the 20s. They spent the next 10 years re no longer than they spent like they spent 14 years slowly renovating that house. Yeah, would love to be able to do it. I remember very clearly in the mid 2000s am eating my fruit snacks living in my parents backyard because I'm a millennial who can't afford a home. 40:46 ah I remember very clearly in the mid 2000s, a family at our church got into house flipping. It was like right when that trend started. And I will say back then it was less of like the cheapest materials, whatever. Like it was like, we're actually trying to make something of this home. But then 2008 happened. Yeah. But they got stuck in one of the houses. Like they had to move into one of the houses that they didn't finish because 41:12 they didn't have the cash anymore. But people were buying homes that were like bad. Yeah, they were buying. And that's the difference. Yes. Is if you're, I don't have a problem. make your, if you are buying a home that needs a ton of renovation. Yeah. Sure. That's not what's happening. A of these people are buying houses that are that, you know, need need renovation for sure. Like your house. 41:38 I would, I would have to do a lot of work at that place. had to do a lot of work at that place, but like I would go, could buy it now. It's, sucks, but I would buy it and I would spend the next 10 years making it better. You know, could move someone in for like 12, dude, the bathroom doesn't even have little covers and the light switches in that house. That's actually true. Yeah. 41:59 we never bothered putting them on all the doors in the house or baby proof baby can't even walk yet. Everything baby, baby, baby, baby, know, there's no need to baby proof stuff when that baby can't go anywhere is what I'm saying. No need to have the door handles. That kid can't touch that door handle for several years. Every morning we wake up and I take my baby and I put his feet on my feet and then I duct tape his legs to my legs. 42:23 and so that way he's forced to stand up and then get used to that started normal. Didn't it that started kind of normal? It's like we're walking and he's like 42:32 and so he's getting really good at walking yeah. I throws up everywhere doesn't I throw up everywhere our fifty like our in fifteen. So anyway, so the one I'm trying to say is Paul wants his dream home. Hinds owes a lot of people a lot of money because he's a gambler. He's a generate gambler with a fake high school diploma and Hines one day is reading a book because it's the seventies. They don't have social media yet 43:01 And I don't know where he got this book, library probably. He's reading this book and he's reading this book, somebody in this, whatever this book was, I don't know what the book was, but he's reading this book. And in the book it says, Teal Albrecht has $2 billion. And he says, oh, that's what I'll do. I'm going to kidnap the founder of Aldi. 43:24 Tim. 43:26 Why did we do so many bits on a story that's interesting? Quit doing this to me, bro. When you start an episode with a 10 minute stupid tangent and then you go, I'm going to kidnap the founder of Aldi, that's crazy. Start with that. I wouldn't have told any of the credit. Cut out the bit about the cruise ships. We wouldn't have done any of stuff. 43:51 So he calls up his buddy, Paul, and says, Hey, you want to kidnap the founder of all D and he's like, yeah, that sounds cool. Dude, I'm texting Andy right now. Hey, you guys working on family for you together. Also, do you want to kidnap the founder of all D with us? Just try to gauge interest. Tilling ninjas or butterflies criminals, crime, crime. That's the thing that unites every podcast. 44:22 What is that time I start shaking hands? He just told us that it's good to me. Sorry he's for I'm more of a passive. I'm a passive investor in this business, so I don't pass so funny. Oh, you fell for the old fake hand. It's a fake hand. It's a big hand. 44:51 I'm gonna start doing that to people that's crazy. Okay, okay, so okay, so he's like all right, shut up everything about this, whatever. Okay, so he's like okay, we're gonna kidnap the founder of Aldi. Yeah, okay, yeah, so one night in November, nineteen seventy one he and Paul they get up, they get together and they said okay, here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna kidnap him and they said good call and then they got the phone and they called his wife and they said ring ring. This is 45:20 They called Teo's wife. it's Teo's wife picks up and she says hello and he says, Hey, miss Albrecht, we just want to let you know that tomorrow we're going to kidnap your husband. Do not call the police. Do not try to stop us. As long as you follow our demands, everything's going to be okay. We're going to release him in due time. And she was like, okay, you haven't done this yet. And they're like, yes, we're doing it tomorrow. And she says, okay. And then 45:48 she listened to them. She just was like I'm not going to tell anybody and so then the next day, could you imagine how mad I would be if I get kidnapped and then later it comes out that my wife was like oh yeah, they give me a heads up about that. Yeah, they told me they were going to do that. They told me they're ready that you don't want to maybe even be like hey, watch out tomorrow. You don't want to like give me a subtle clue of like hey today is going to be really weird. Hey, watch your back today. Okay, if you're leaving and your wife says watch your back today, 46:19 so yeah. So he goes to work, does his work day on the way out of work. They kidnap him. How do they kidnap him? They they just grab them. They threw him in the back of his own car as he was trying to get in his car. They threw him in the back of his own car, covered up his hands, covered up a backseat yeah, the backseat of his own car and then they drove out with his own car. Here's the thing you're way more kidnapable than I am. Look at you. Let's try it. Imagine let's hire a team to kidnap both of us and see who gets tapped. 46:47 Okay, but imagine I can't get into the back seat of a car willingly. I can't do that when I want to do it. That's true. Yeah, try to get an uber is awful. Yeah, you could get me in the back seat of a car that doesn't have a back seat. Yeah, you will be comfortable in the back of a two thousand one Ford Ranger. I love the back of a Ford Ranger. 47:16 That's the context quote. I love the back of a Ford Ranger. No, those were great. They had the sideway. We don't have to explain. They're great. They're great. The back of a Ford Ranger was great. Hands up. Don't shoot. 47:38 You're to put me in the backseat of your car officer. 47:44 uh Tim, it's been an hour and half, so 47:53 so they throw him the back of the car. They pull out in the street. They're driving across town and as they're driving across town, is he just in the back seat being like yes, like yes, tied up and everything in the back seat, but mean like out the window looking at other cars. Well, that's what I'm saying. Like I guess not because there's actually we know that they leave. They're at like a stop sign somewhere else in town. The car next one pulls up and they realize oh that's his brother Carl and they see Carl looking 48:21 and later we know carls like yeah he's like I saw that I was like oh that's my brother's car and then he saw the people in the cars. I guess somebody else has the same car as my brother and then just kept driving didn't notice didn't notice his brother tied up in the back. Maybe that's a tactic. Maybe that's why Jojo see what has her face all over her car because there's nobody else who's got that you know. I'm about some people, but it's weird that your car looks just like Jojo. what wow so they take them. They take them home. 48:49 they park him in the garage to wear his house, hide his house, yeah, okay, and so they park him in the garage and then they go inside and then they are like okay. Well, we'll deal with him in the morning. We just leave him out there in the next morning. They come out and they're they get in the car and they're like what are we going to do and they try to finger it out and he's been stuck in the car overnight. He just kind of left in there and he was like all right. I guess I'm stuck. I guess I'll stay in here. Yeah, I'll stay in my own car. Yeah exactly and they overnight. He couldn't figure out a way to get out. I guess not. I feel like that's not a secure plan. Well, 49:18 it worked. And so the next day they're like, okay, this is not a permanent solution. We got to figure something out here. And so they're like, they realized we have, we don't have even anything close to a plan yet. And they're like, we don't know how we're going to get a ransom. We don't know where we're going to put this guy. We don't know anything about what we're going to do. And we don't know how we're going to transport them. So they start trying to figure out what they're going to do and they ended up deciding, Hey, okay, we can roll them up in a rug and take them to my office. 49:46 Heinz is law firm office. He's not dead by the way, so if you roll up in a rug and you walk him through the office and he just goes hey guys, I'm in the 50:02 I'm in the rug! Here's the rug. 50:10 Okay, so they could he's not dead yeah, so one of them went out and picked up a rug from the rug store and then these guys are dumb. How old are these guys at this point? I mean, I think heines. I don't know for sure, but I think kinds is roughly fifty um cron is younger. He's like okay, when he's early thirties, okay, and so heines is heines is like. Okay, you go out and get a rug. I'll wait for you here. I'll watch him and then he goes gets the rug. They come back 50:37 And they're like, okay, we're to have to drive him outside of town so we can transport him from this car to uh a Volkswagen, a larger Volkswagen van. Sure. We can actually roll the rug up and have him in there rolled up where there's room for that. And so they drove outside of town, they roll him up in the rug and then they drive back to his office. The problem that they realized though was, oh, he's taller than the rug that we got. So now he looks like a pig in a blanket. 51:06 yeah, head and feet are just sticking out this rug and they're like this is this looks more conspicuous and so they just told them. They said they said you're going to have to walk with us into the office and if you say anything we're going kill you and he was like okay in front of everybody. Well, that's what they told. I feel like okay and so they go into his office building. They walk into his office building, walk him up the stairwell, pass his office, yeah, whose office they're going to hinds his office, hinds his law. Okay, okay, okay, the law firm yeah and so they walk them 51:35 up the staircase and then they walk, they walk through the hallway. He hears the sound of church bells and the streetcar outside. And then, and then they walk him past this really long, thin bathroom. And then they take them into this like closet and they say, you're going to have to stay here. And they lock them in this closet. But conveniently, um, for Tao, uh, they had set up like a living arrangement there. So there's like a little bed. There was like a desk. Um, it was like, 52:02 relatively comfortable. was like it was kind of like a cheap airbnb. There's a bad. There's a desk where you can do your little drawings if you want yeah, and so they they came in the next day and they took a suit and they took it. Don't worry about that skeleton in the corner. He's the last guy. It's like very clearly it's on the stick and everything is very clearly from a science class, but they got it. They're like this is the last guy who didn't listen to us. Yeah, 52:30 that's what's going to happen to you. It's the eight foot skeleton from home depot like that's the last guy who did it. 52:40 it's like yeah. I believe that so he didn't fit in the back of his car. Yeah, so the rug was way too small for him, so they they they leave up there our another day. They leave up there another day. Okay, come back in the morning and they take a suit and they go get it dry clean. Now this has been three days. Yeah, 53:03 they take a suit. go get a dry clean so that way he'll look nice and fresh when they drop him back off once nice. We want you to look at looking good and then they and then they leave them there and then at no point they haven't made any demands yet. No and his wife knows his wife's like yeah, you got kidnapped. Hey, where's he got? Where's your husband at now? He's on a retreat right now. You got kidnapped. 53:23 I'm waiting for the ransom. I guess I don't really give me any details. They just told me not to say anything. I let it happen. Yeah, yeah, you know and I'm just waiting for them to do. Well, they're gonna do. does a podcast with his best friend and they were kind of like and and so I just figured it was part of that figured is a bit for the show. Yeah, but maybe this is real now that I'm thinking about it. Yeah, should I be worried? 53:49 worried. 53:56 three hours, buddy. I thought you were said to a bit. You said worried and you were taking a long sip and I was just waiting for you to continue three hours, three at four and a half hours with the reporting going way too long. So I got stuff to do today, so the days start ticking by okay, three days, four days, five days. They're feeding him. I'm yeah, they're feeding him. They're actually feeding him well. They're bringing him like steak and potatoes like they're feeding him well and he's like he's there 54:26 I'm worth $50 billion. This steak is non-medium rare. Like I like the idea that you're being held captive and yet still. But you're still like, this is not good enough for me. And so. 54:54 50 billion dollars 55:09 And then you called it out You didn't just let me do the bit that makes me so You see how easy it is to get him dude 55:24 you're like a kid that like the peekaboo game gets you every time, so if I if I find little new peekaboo's I could be like okay, I'm just going to use this so much. uh 55:41 Okay, so so five days go by and nothing has happened. I just can't believe this show isn't growing by the way we just played peekaboo at six hours into recording. Ali dude, so he's like we're five days into this. Nothing has happened. Yeah, he's like he's like I even he's like hey, guys need help. He's like you guys know who to even ask for a ransom. Well, he's sitting there and he's like and waiting for him to negotiate. I guess well, that's what he says. He said he's a 56:11 He said tail. You are worth two billion dollars. He says you have built a grocery store empire and the way you've built this empire is by going to farmers and distributors and negotiating lower prices. So that way you can sell discount goods to the people of Germany and greater Europe and he's like I can negotiate my release. So the next time they show up. Oh, this is him talking to himself. Yeah, I thought you were saying that Heinz went into the room, sat at the desk and was like tail 56:40 you have negotiated billions like I was like this him. I pick himself up. Okay, okay, okay, so he's he's he's going to start negotiating his rise that so they they show up again. This is day five okay and he says hey, I'll give you guys a hundred thousand dollars if you let me go and they say no, that's not enough and they leave them there for three more days and they don't talk to him and they don't talk to anybody else and it just continues being this thing. 57:10 where they are not taking any action. They kidnapped this guy and they clearly this is such an adhd thing to do to by the way you have a plan. You're like let's kidnap a guy you do. You call his wife or kidnapping tomorrow. You go, you can have a tomorrow and then you put him in your office and then you kind of forgot yeah. You're like I got a couple of things you're like oh you like open the closet to get something like I forgot you there. 57:37 Hey, thanks for listening to things I learned last night. It would do us a huge favor if you could just share this episode with somebody or just share the show. Tell someone you like it. That helps us grow the show. Another way to help us grow the show is to support our merch, which is actually super comfy. We changed to a new merch supplier a couple of years ago called fourth wall. You can buy our stuff at shop.tillin.com. None of this is a pressure by the way, but it just really does help us grow the show and it helps, you know, get the word out and people ask me about my hoodie in the airport all the time. So they're really comfy. Would love for you to support the show. 58:06 And either way, thanks for being here. We're glad that we get to do this podcast. 58:15 100,000. No, I think I want to. I know I can get more. I'll hold on. I'll talk to you later. Hold on. A week goes by you're doing stuff and you hear a little thud in the closet and you're like, is that a goat? Oh, it's that kid. It's that that kidnapped the person. I got Lee. That's that man. I nabbed. I may have nabbed that guy. So, but you haven't 58:43 you haven't asked anybody for a ransom you haven't yeah exactly. They're just holding them and so then they start then they're like we've had them for too long. We need to send a letter to his wife and so they go in there and they say hey here's a piece of paper. Here's a pen. We need you to write a letter to your wife and but you're not going to write it. We're going to tell you what to write so that way it looks like it's from your handwriting but we're going to tell you what to write. Okay, so they dictate a letter to him 59:12 that's basically like, hey, I've been kidnapped. I'm OK. Don't worry about it. Everything's going to be fine. I'll see you soon. But there was no demands in the letter. And they just shipped off the letter to be like, yeah, everything's OK. And so at this point, his wife is like, maybe I should talk to somebody about this. police, two months ago, someone called me and said they were going to kidnap my husband. And I just haven't come to you. 59:41 and honestly it just came one of those things where like every passing day made it worse. Yeah, it's like it's like now it's been too long and then it's like you know so I'm saying I couldn't do it. I didn't do it the day after now I've waited too long and you know so I'm just I'm really starting please don't just I'm pulling the band aid right now. My husband's been kidnapped. There's they don't want anything that yeah they don't want anything. Sorry, sorry. 01:00:08 I don't know why they get down to it. They're not talking. I'm really sorry about that. I'm so mad at myself. I'm so mad at myself. There he goes doing that bit again. Here it is working. Seven hours. We've been recording for seven hours. It's about to reset. It's literally been two seconds. We've hit the limit. Okay, keep going. 01:00:38 so uh so she contacts the police. The police are like oh, we love this. We're going to get on this. um We love kidnappings and so they put together a team to pretend to be his wife and they go to his wife's house, also his house and they wear costumes and I don't understand. They wear costumes, they're armed, they get on a call that they record with the kidnappers and 01:01:09 wait there in costume. You know we got to look like we got to look like them. I got to get into character like that's just a theater kid that works with police dude. Oh, you know what help we get into character. We got to dress like a friggin Mrs Doubtfire. They met her around for a week. I'm a wife and they're like yes. Hello Mrs. Teo. We've talked to we've we've we talked on the phone. Well, two years ago, two years ago, 01:01:39 seven hours ago and so we don't, honestly, you don't remember what she sounds like. So the police, okay, so they go to her house, so they go to her house. He they get the people to call. They get on the phone and they basically negotiate the release with them and what they agree to is a seven million doish mark ransom, okay, which I maybe I should just use the calculator. I was going to try to do it in my head. I was like this is not going to work. 01:02:07 Uh, translates to in us dollars today, this would be about $16 million. Okay. And so enough to pay his debts, enough to build this guy's house and enough for them both to live off of for a little while after this. Okay. And they were like, yeah, I think that'll work. We like that amount. And they say we can meet up at this one location, uh, at this like nondescript location by this lake. Um, and 01:02:37 we'll bring him, you bring the money and we'll do the do the handoff, we'll do the swap. They arranged this meeting and they were like the police said, okay, there's a possibility that they're going to bring a double a body double. It's not actually him and they're going to try to fool us into thinking that this is the guy, but it's not really the guy. And so they said, we're going to have to have a way to verify that it's really him, but we can't bring his wife. That's dangerous. We put her in the line of fire. That's risky. We can't do that. 01:03:05 so we have body double we need that that knows what he looks like. Okay, then I said we need to bring his priest will bring his priest along and the priest will ask him questions to verify that it's him that only he would know the answer to okay. It's like it's like when you forgot your past, what's your first dog's name? 01:03:31 A little priest caller. 01:03:36 Hello, Hello. Hello, child. What city was your mother born in? 01:03:44 And a lot of people don't know that that's how they came up with that for the Internet. I guess it's this it's this case eight hours going so they show up, they get him out of the car and it's it feels similar to weekend at Bernie's because the two criminals they pull tail out of the car and he's like in his suit that they just freshly dry cleaned again because it's been weeks since they got a dry clean last he's wearing sunglasses at night, but they've also duct taped his eyes. You can see the duct tape behind the sunglasses because they don't want him to see 01:04:14 is it just like squares of duct tape over his eyes and he's wearing this like that looks like them, but we can't see his eyes. So I don't know for sure as they say father, it's your job. It's priest father. You're up send in the priest, which honestly pretty sick. So the pretty we need like an action poster where the priest is like ripping through the yeah, the garb and is just like jacked gun just loaded. 01:04:43 cross guns, cross guns. I like the sound of this um so like a BB comics yeah yeah yeah I like that yeah yeah. You always do this, so the priest comes up to him and says hey a couple weeks ago you got a new arm war. What type of wood was it 01:05:13 tail was like I don't know do Mahagany. What the heck you talking about security question is that I did not set that security question up, so he gets that question wrong and everyone's like oh it's a body double and he's like don't worry. I got two more questions for you. These guys aren't smart enough to think body. They couldn't get him in a rug that was large enough for him, so they he's like he's like don't worry. I got a couple more questions and he says what's your wife's name? 01:05:44 so really dialed back the severity after that okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, I know that I know that I know that and then where were you born and so he's like well you got two out of three it's probably him. Good to figure out the armors got me really curious, but I don't know if he don't even know where an arm war is it's like a closet. It's like a it's like a stand up. It's like a stand up cause I don't have a closet. It's like a dresser, but as a closet okay, because you're building to put a closet a wardrobe. Yes, yeah, 01:06:13 It's another word for wardrobe. Yeah. Yeah. So uh they're like, yeah, it's him. And so they're like, okay, you, you pass us the guy, we'll pass you the money. And they're like, okay. And then did the past, they did the exchange and then the police loaded him into the car. They load the money in the car and they left and they went their separate ways and they immediately skipped town. They're like, we got to get out of here. They checked the, they checked their, the, the briefcases. Money was real. They said, okay, 01:06:43 perfect. We're outside town. uh I think we got away. Let's bury this somewhere, so they buried all the money because they were worried it was going to get sure yeah. The police took him home, took him to the wife and said we're not sure if it's really him two out of three questions right and they're like look at them and they took us duct tape off. Didn't have any eyelashes because the tape, but then he was like oh yeah, I'm pretty sure that's him. ah She was like I'm pretty sure 01:07:08 pretty sure I think that's him. It'll do. I don't know. It's been like four weeks. I don't really remember it'll do so. He gets back the next day. He goes back to work at Aldi immediately um and then not even kidding a couple weeks later. He buys Trader Joe's while this whole case is going over. Oh um yeah, and then they start expanding Trader Joe's, um but then the police are like well, we let those guys go, but a plan was like we're going to get them. Wait, so all the interior Joe's are owned by the same people. Yeah, 01:07:37 Yeah, they bought trade. Those trade. It wasn't founded by them, but they bought trader joes and then they expanded them. That's why they feel so similar. They don't feel similar. They feel very similar. Trader joes feels like american aldi. Okay, they feel so so anyway. uh You're been to trade rose trader joes great trader joes. Stop talking. Don't talk about about her joes. Don't say anything. I'm not saying anything bad about trader joes. Okay, 01:08:02 trade of does feels like if someone went into an all day and we're like what if this was a little better? No, I was going to say a little harder to afford to trade. Rose is cheap. Are you kidding? You've not been a trade. It's not the same as all the all these way cheaper than Trader Joe's. Okay, I am telling you, Trader Joe's is affordable. 01:08:25 Okay, I we literally explain it's because I want to or just a trade or jose. The only trader just here is in Lee and the prices weren't bad. It's not worth the drive over to lee would from your house. Maybe I don't know anyways, so I'm not going to let you gaslight me on the prices that trader jose versus the price. I can buy a dozen eggs for three dollars forty nine cents. Yeah, it's pretty and my trader jose versus like 01:08:54 seven dollars at Ralph's yeah seems like you don't know how much it costs. 01:09:02 so he's off by Trader Joe. feel insane. I feel insane right whatever did he's off by Trader Joe's and you what does like work a lot of money supporting us on Patreon. That's pretty cheap. We made that cheap on purpose because no one wants to do it. 01:09:24 No people want to do it. We like them a lot. Thanks for doing it. Thanks for things. No, I already did the pitch. Just move on. Thank you. You get less of this. We promise we cut this with all this stuff cut out. This we make the pores. Listen to this. I'm sorry you're too poor to get to the seven hours of recording. Keep going. So I'm so mad right now he's off by in trader chose the please are like. All right, let's track those guys down. Okay and so 01:09:52 Ines goes home to his girlfriend and his girlfriend's really worried because she knows that he's off with all these other girls. She doesn't know that he kidnapped this guy. Okay, he comes home one night covered in mud and she's like that's weird. There's no mud at your office and she's like what do why so dirty and he's like I was a work thing and she's like it was a team building retreat where we all went out to the woods and then voted one person to die and we buried him. We buried him alive 01:10:21 he's he's is really brought us all together. I don't know if he's alive anymore. It's we all trauma bond it over. Do people keep doing these breakout rooms or they go higher and improv team? No dude, kill someone in your office. Have your whole team coming together and can vote someone out. Yeah, then trauma bond over that. Yeah, yeah, no one will ever quit again because you got dirt on him. 01:10:48 I'm so mad that you ruin bits like this. I hate that you take funny stuff and make it unfunny. 01:11:00 I really hate when you do that. Okay, so you got dirt on. It's really funny because it's like slinging mud on your co workers, so he so the police are like okay. We're gonna track these guys down. I just feel buried. Hines goes to Mexico um and cron is cron was always kind of the the grunt guy in this whole job. It was very clear that Heinz was kind of taking advantage of cron 01:11:29 Yeah, and so cron got stuck with being the grand guy uh hides took seven million dollars and left and gave ten thousand dollars to cron, uh which is not cron to build his house right and not even close to enough for cron to build his house. The police, this obviously hits the news and everyone's like all the ceo kidnapped for a month and his wife said nothing and they're like, but we got to be the main story. Don't worry, we got them uh 01:11:57 we actually have the recording of the phone call with the crook and we're going to play that on air and anybody who recognizes the voice of the guy come forward so we can track him down and get him. And so really yeah, so we have the audio of it. No. Okay, so they play the audio and uh cron is at now cron is at his parents house with his sister. uh 01:12:25 all adult sister and they're just having tea watching TV that night together, the watching family feud back when there was decorum and then this special comes on and they play this the sound and the the story goes. I don't know if this is true, but the story goes that the family all immediately knew that that was him and they all look all this in there and you get a little clinging of the teas and go and everything just gets silent and they all do the thing where they go. 01:12:59 Did you kidnap the founder of Haldy? And so? Nine. 01:13:10 Why do you argue with everything I say? So he didn't even look at deny, deny, deny. That's Tim's playbook. He didn't say anything. You didn't look at his family. He just left. He just got up and left. He goes, this is too. Oh no. So he leaves and his parents are like, yeah, we're going to, I think we're going to have to call it cops and our son. And so they call it in. Meanwhile, would you please get another tip? 01:13:40 on your kid yeah. I feel like all true yeah. I feel like you have to for kidnapping where the guy's fine. I think we're like something really bad yeah. I think you have to because I think what happens inevitably it comes back that you knew and you also go down for it, but it's like you have other people you're responsible. So you're protecting yourself over your kid. No, I literally just said you have other people you're responsible for and so you have the other children. You have your spouse, you have your own plays 01:14:10 so I'm just making sure that if I did something bad, you would not help cover. You would wrap me out because you're like I have other people to responsible for absolutely. Okay, you would rat me out to no I would less. There was a good enough reward in that I would get something for it. I'm going to rat you out for the game. I got to do this for you think I like to help cops yeah. I'm going to hey, I'll tell you for a hundred thousand dollars. 01:14:38 Yeah, I'm starting to negotiate the reward. Oh, wait a minute. Hey yeah, the reward. I thought the reward is fifteen thousand dollars for information on this. Would you guys do all right anyway? We've been here for four days and then they've been record simultaneously get a tip from a shop clerk at an electronic store. Okay, who recently sold a home stereo system and was like hey, I'm 01:15:06 really confident that the guy I sold this home stereo system to was the guy on that phone call. How distinct are their voices? You know, I'm like how did he damn like this? Was he like hey, you better pay the rent and then you hear it. You go. I'm pretty sure I heard that terrifying voice the other day when I sold that stereo system. How unique is your voice? I don't know. That's a good question. So the police, they get a call from both of them and they say let's go to the stereo guy first. 01:15:36 So they go the stereo guy and what they did that was what they always do is they took note of all the serial numbers on the bills that they gave these guys. Oh, of course, and so then they said show us the bills and then he's like yep. This is our guy ah and so they went and they got paul. They arrested paul and paul they entered. They're interrogating him trying to figure out who the other guy involved was paul is like tight lipped. He's not going to talk about it. Meanwhile, hindsight is on a plane of Mexico uh 01:16:04 after weeks of interrogation, there was nothing that they had to point them to Heinz. Paul finally cracks and they managed to go get Heinz extradited and they put him ah on trial for it. Okay, and so both of them ended up getting arrested. Both of them were sentenced to eight and a half years in prison. What's interesting is only half the ransom was ever recovered, so there's three and a half million dollars still out there somewhere buried, and the story is that uh 01:16:32 both of them. They got released from prison. Both of them live pretty low profile lives. After this, we don't know a lot about what they did. Sure, we do know that all in Berg recently died in twenty eighteen and what is largely believed is that that remaining three and half million is what he lived off of for the rest of his life. He may have to go dig that up wherever he had it and live off that because it was only an eight year sentence. It's the moral of the story is it doesn't matter how bad you're at it. It's only eight years in prison. 01:17:03 Eight years. That's how long it took us to do this episode. Wow yeah, so all the ended up becoming like a giant brand to they still own Trader Joe's. It's still on Trader Jones. They still own Aldi, obviously Trader Jones, Trader Trader Jones, Trader Jones, Trader Jones, Trader Joe's cheap, affordable, pretty decent food, Trader Joe's Trader Joe's. Maybe it's not expensive, but it's it feels like it's trying to 01:17:30 appeal to the oh I agree. We actually we thought that we thought it was expensive yeah, so we were shopping around for a long time and then we went to Trader Joe's. I don't know why we went to Trader Joe's because oh, I think I saw like a thing online. It was like one of their pre made meals and I was like oh, let's go try that yeah and I and we went in and I was like wait this pack of chicken is three dollars yeah like this. This is crazy. Yeah, I think I think we do our entire girl. I'm not tell I'm Joe. I'm not joking when I say that we took our grocery bill from like three hundred dollars a week to a hundred and twenty 01:17:59 Yeah, I mean, maybe it is because what I did is what I did was I got a I all I ever bought there was a jar of salsa and it was like nine dollars. I was like this is a pretty pricey thing. A salsa is decent. Nine dollar like organic salsa. I don't remember. There's jars of salsa that are a little 99 cents. That's crazy because that's not what it's not what it was there. Okay, I can't keep doing this with you. Can I go back and forth? 01:18:29 can't do it. I don't think you know how much it costs there. Hey, instead of the fiddle lock, we see the family few theme song. That's prices right. Is that prices right? Okay, wait, hold on. on. I got it. That's very similar. 01:18:55 Hey, thanks for being here. Please share this episode with somebody else. Tell somebody about the show. Maybe not this episode, maybe a different one. Maybe one where we stayed on track more often, maybe share the gardener museum heist. It's an episode where these 40 minutes him. 01:19:13 I'm so sick of you right now. Garment museum. Heises episode where two guys stole a bunch of heart that still fits in and so they taped up the security guard in the basement. It's a great episode. We'll see you next Tuesday for another episode of things on last night.


Theo Albrecht and his brother Karl Albrecht built Aldi from a single family-owned grocery store in post-war Germany. Born in 1922, Theo grew up watching his parents run a small shop during hard times. After World War II devastated much of Germany, the brothers rebuilt what was left of the store. Their focus was simple: sell essential goods cheaply and … Read More

The Time Aliens Possessed a Pilot | Rafael Perez Ep 295

10-07-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Happy to be here. Good. Have you ever heard of Raphael Pacheco Perez? Yes, really. I don't know. Why do you Pacheco Pacheco a fighter? Is that what I know that from? Oh, you're gonna you're gonna actually you're probably gonna want us to take this out. Actually, the fact that you don't know Isaiah Pacheco, that's why I'm thinking that from that's where you know 00:29 Rafael Pacheco Perez? 00:35 interesting. So anyway, so he as a professional pilot. Okay, first of all, you're not a professional pilot. You're an amateur pilot. That is too sad to fly, too sad to fly. My wings got clipped by my uh 00:56 Things I learned last night. oh 01:05 What am I thinking of then I this okay? Keep going okay? Sorry, yeah, why would I want to take that out? I'm not ashamed that you don't know the chiefs running back. Oh, that's why I'm thinking of that. Yes, is that, but that's not who we're talking about. No, yeah, so I has the same last name right, but you were just like why I know Pacheco right, but I was thinking wasn't there a UFC or not a UFC a boxing match between a Pacheco. That's what I was going for. 01:34 Let's see Pacheco Boxer. Let's find out. I thought you were like oh you're embarrassing. You don't know boxers and I was like what are you talking about? Diego Pacheco yeah, that's what I okay. I just I really was pretty confident that you were thinking of Isaiah Pacheco and you didn't remember him. Nope, let's think of the boxer. I don't think you were. You don't think I was thinking of the boxer when I said is this guy a fighter and you were like actually Pacheco was a fighter 02:04 we fought hard for every down like don't try to shame me dude. Anyway, this episode is about Diego Pacheco. uh Okay, who is this episode about for real though? Rafael Pacheco Perez, Rafael Pacheco Perez. Go for it. Yeah, so he okay. Hold on. First of all, I started doing this thing 02:30 I started like, I've got this new icebreaker that I've been trying out. 02:37 that's here. I just like ask people this in line sure like just like when there's a law in conversation places and ice breaker. I've got this new ice breaker. This can't go anywhere good. 02:52 Go ahead. I've been saying so 03:08 I kill a killer, pretty fine, so was the last time you've been in a fight. People love this question, especially strangers. I just say people. If someone turned to me, I'm in line of the grocery store. Someone turns to me and goes so when's last time you've been in a fight, I would go. Is it about to be right now right now? Are you about to fight me? 03:38 What are you talking about? Why are you small talking people, but the fights? Well, I first did this. That's pretty funny. I did to my dad the other day. We working on my wife's car and we were just like he was working on your wife's car. You were standing there flashlight in their wrench and stuff. I was like so dad was 04:03 It's been a while. Is that what I last? Yeah, when's the last time you've been in a fight? I don't know. High school maybe I think my last fight was probably fresh in your high school. What was it about? Mine was a backyard soccer game that got a little too serious. What was your is a backyard soccer game? I got a little too serious. That's crazy. Was it the were we each other's last? 04:33 we will be come by the time this comes out by the time it was or comes out. Me and Tim will have been each other's last fight. Okay, what a crazy thing to say. I'm one of my ice breakers. I've been asking people in the grocery store 04:52 I've been grabbing milk, freezer. eh It doesn't suction, but it does get little gravity to it. oh I go, so. m 05:02 Did your school do a kill Jennifer day? 05:08 I don't know what's worse. Do school do is a front school day Jennifer's dead out front day. I need I've got to be somewhere else right now. Actually, thanks for asking. I got to get the heck out of here. What? Okay, so you can tell that Tim has nothing to talk about when he's doing bits up front. You can tell that he knows this story to me four minutes long. Tell it 05:34 Rafael Pacheco Perez. uh He was. Let me see if I got a birth date for him. Doesn't matter. He he was a student pilot in the seventies, uh so he was probably like born like nineteen fifty eight, something like that is my guess. uh Sure, we're reporting on it. That's the truth uh made up speculated facts. Okay, 06:02 uh student pilot going through uh the pilots Academy and pilots account, the end of the program on June twenty first, nineteen seventy six was his first solo okay, uh and so uh he was flying. I want to acknowledge something real quick. Yeah, I was laughing before this episode and I couldn't tell you why, but I was reading an article about this and the article 06:31 said he was flying an XBZOX. And I was like, I've never heard of that plane. I look idiot. And it's the tail number. It's the tail number of the plane. I was like, what is this? What's a Cessna XBZOX? It didn't even say Cessna. It just said they were flying an XBZOX plane. they were wrong. They were dumb. They be dumb also. Right. 07:00 so yeah, was a sest in one fifty yeah and he lives in Mexico City and so he was getting ready for a solo flight. The solo the flight path. Here's what it would have been. If he was walking it, it was a five hour walk, but about an hour flight taking off from Mexico City International Air, really super zoomed out. Then there's no way that's five. What well you're also walking through Mexico City and so there is it twenty three kilometers going to take a full hour. Sure, 07:30 a full hour. I don't know, but what I can say for sure, what I can say for sure is taking off from the airport, then there's this little lake there and there's this just kind of open space in Mexico City. Yeah. And I don't know if this is something that happens in the States, but for his solo flight today, the flight plan was take off from Mexico City airport, fly around the lake, do a little test landing in the field by the lake, that open field that where I've got the dot marked. Okay. 07:56 and then take back off, fly back to Mexico City. So maybe the whole flight was an hour. Is there an air strip in this field or is he doing a soft landing? So it's a soft landing. Yeah. Okay, and so and that this is his first solo. So this is like an exciting day for him. The weather wasn't great for a first solo is a little little overcast, but it wasn't like bad by any means. It just wasn't perfect weather, like not what you hope to fly in. Yeah, and so he takes off for this trip 08:25 uh gets up to about nine hundred feet uh and then all of a sudden he disappears from the radar and the uh tower is obviously trying to contact him, try to figure out where he went. He is meanwhile he's in the cockpit of the plane having a difficult time. A lot of his uh instruments stop working effectively. The only thing that's working right is the altimeter, but everything else 08:54 giving him strange readings. It's very what's the word visibility is very low because he's now up in like overcast like the clouds are really low. So visibility is really bad. Okay, next thing he knows he comes out of this cloud and he looks down and he sees water. So he thinks I must be over the lake, but then he continues looking around and he realizes there's more water than there is the lake. So his first reaction is the lake, like grew the lake up bigger. 09:23 sure, but no, he realizes I must be over the ocean uh and this is very strange because obviously the ocean isn't anywhere near a further away yeah and uh and he looks at his altimeter and he's at seven thousand feet and okay, so he's very confused. He starts trying to uh figure out all of his other instruments and quickly he turns to an emergency line and starts trying to contact 09:49 whatever tower he's closest to. doesn't, he doesn't have any idea where he's at or how he got here. Um, and so he ends up, um, coming up over, uh, over the, over tower to this emergency line. And he, he says, help, I'm Rafael Pacheco Perez student 82 from the aviation school of Mexico city. Uh, whoever's out there, please reply. Right. So this comes over a couple of times and tower responds to him. Um, and tower says, uh, 10:18 Hey, we've got you. um there anybody else in the aircraft with you? And he says no. And so then they direct him to take an emergency landing. OK, um he takes this emergency landing and where he ended up was in Acapulco. OK, at the International Airport there. And so he was over the ocean outside Acapulco. Now, I need to note something real quick. We have this map on screen. This map is Google Maps. 10:48 telling you the flight time from Mexico City to Acapulco. Right, right, As a jet. Yeah, that's jet airliner. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so this is... would be a couple hours. Yeah, this is a few hour flight, not a one hour flight. It's also over a mountain range, a very high mountain range. Okay. And so him being a student pilot that was just about to take his first solo... 11:11 he was not equipped to fly at the altitude. He was going to have to fly out to get over those maps. You know shouldn't be in the clouds. Yeah, because especially this is first solo. He wouldn't have been in the clouds anyway. Yeah, so there's a lot of things that are going. This isn't an instrument's flight. Yes, exactly uh and so not to mention the other thing that's a little strange about this. He's flying this one fifty and this trip was a short hour long flight with that quick essentially touch and go in a field. 11:40 and so there wasn't fuel to get him to where he ended up. And so what was strange is when he landed, they checked his fuel gauge and he was basically bone dry and so it was kind of strange that he even got where he ended up. Yeah, so he lands and they were like we needed to arrest that guy, so they did. They arrested him okay, because I think I think the reason being is like you can't just fly around for no reason. Yeah, you can't just steal a plane 12:12 he's like, I'm a student pilot. They're like, no, you're not. And he's like, I'm from this school. They're like, that school doesn't exist. And he's like, what I thought you're to be like, he landed and it was 1998 for twenty years. He was in this cloud. 12:26 So he lands, they interview him, uh and they realize like, like his story checks out, everything he's telling checks out. So he ends up getting to walk away. This becomes like a widely publicized news story. This is okay. uh And obviously like this is a paper from Mexico City telling his story. uh It very quickly gets buried. The Mexican government steps in and buries his story. Okay. 12:54 And what ends up happening is decades later, um audio logs from the tower get released. OK, what happened because and this is I'll tell you why that the story ended up getting buried uh when he ah he was over Mexico City and he flew through this cloud. m And then from his experience, he essentially just appeared in 13:24 a cup of co from his experience. Okay, but what happened from tower in a cup of co is this unknown flight that they did not have on schedule just flew into their airspace right and when it flew into their space, they pinged this flight to identify themselves. uh At first the flight did not identify themselves. They didn't say anything right knowledge, but then pretty quickly um the pilot of the flight asked to move to a separate frequency. 13:53 to have a conversation on a different frequency with Tower. at the beginning, Tower was a little resistant, but I like, just tell us what you're doing. It just tells who you are and why you're somewhere you're not supposed to be. And so eventually they did switch to a different frequency. Okay. From this frequency, what they heard from Rafael was here's a quote. He is speaking because he is ordered to do so. This is this is his voice. 14:23 He speaking out of his own free will, but we are using him as if he were. Yes, we're using him as if he were a microphone. Who's the we, Tim? Who's the we? They then said, who's they? They said, don't matter. They said we don't matter. um 14:47 Did you go with me into an alien episode by making me think this is about pilots and planes? 14:58 It might be an alien episode. 15:09 Hey, join us on Patreon if you want this to be ad free and also there's tons of other perks you get to all episodes are ad free. You get next week's episode right now and you get to do monthly hangouts with me and Tim like we really look. It's like a virtual just hang out room and we play games together. We talk. We have show and tell sometimes we've made a lot of good friends through this and so it's a really good time to do that. So either way, please share the episode. Tell somebody about it. These are all those ways to help us grow the show because we love doing it. We want to keep doing it. So thanks for being here. 15:47 we are speaking through him. Well, I okay. What else did they say? They said we don't matter much. What are you looking for compliments? You're an alien fishing for compliments being like we're speaking through him. We don't matter much and towers like no, you do matter. I was like no, no, you are important. Everybody, everybody, everyone likes you. No, we don't matter. 16:14 sure we sell so many shirts with your face on it down here. Here's what I think actually happened. We'll get to the theory at the end, I guess, but here's what I think actually happened. I think he flew too high and then there was probably carbon oxide or something in the cabin and he's now hallucinating or having some kind of medical emergency. That's actually a really interesting theory that I have not seen anyone say because it because that's what I thought first was that if he went to it into a cloud because like here's the thing about planes. 16:44 planes will you know the fly yeah like they're engineered to float yeah you know like it's not unless you push down that yolk and guide it down like it's it's going to keep flying. So you're saying he in the confusion when the overcast guys were too low. He went up because he wasn't instrument trained right too high got carbon monoxide poisoning passed out well and the altitude signal I did 17:11 the altitude sickness and the carbon oxide poison aren't the same exact thing like. if there's a leak from your engine into your cabin, yeah, like it's basically like you're putting your face up against the exhaust pipe of your car. Yeah, yeah, and so you're getting into it. There's a little indicator in there. That's like a little piece of cork or whatever that can turn colors to be like hey, your car won't open a window. Yeah, you know, that's one thing I would think, or maybe he just got too high and and and didn't know, but either way he shouldn't have flown into a cloud. So that's where I'm saying like the problem 17:41 existed before he flew into a cloud. Yeah, because if he if he's a student pilot on his first solo, then that's he there's no way he's instrument trained. Yeah, you know. Yeah. So it's like he's not. Do you think it's possible for him in a 150 if that's what happened? I'm curious about this. This is an interesting theory for him to glide if he got high enough altitude to glide. like you've got power on the plane. Yeah, you know, I think that if he let's say he passed out, let's just say he passed out. 18:11 okay right. He's going up passes out powers full throttle. Yeah, power is going to keep you going up yeah and at a certain level that engine like with the the Cessna, especially like they just can't reach past a certain height. Yeah, you know and so he's kind of capped out up here where the engines full throttle and you're just flying yeah yeah, you know and as long as you know, as long as you don't know he didn't accidentally 18:36 to the you know it did leveled out. I'm sure yeah, especially if he even if he had cruised and trimmed or whatever it was like he yeah, it's still going to fly forward interesting and so then he wakes up and he's and he doesn't know where he's at and the plane has just been going yeah. That's that's the most lots of interesting theory. The luck that it would take I guess a seven of the mountains. You know, but I'm saying like if that full throttle was up, then he would have just kept going up, but also the luck of like if you're flying and you're 19:04 passed out, then there's no other air traffic that you run into true. You know yeah, I mean this is seventy six right in Mexico, so like I don't know how much traffic they had in that area. That's what I'm wondering. It's like that would that would make the most sense to me that he wakes up and he's over the water and he's like wait a minute. How did I get to him? He's like why close my eyes and open my eyes and there I was yeah, you know, because you don't know how long you were passed out. Yeah, but how do you explain what tower experienced ah 19:35 This guy talks in his sleep. 19:39 that's what I'm saying. He may have been delusional yeah, if it's carbon oxide poisoning, maybe yeah yeah interesting. That's a theory. That's an interesting theory. I haven't heard anyone say that, but I was I wasn't saying he passed out. saying if he passed out the plane will fly the plane will just go yeah yeah yeah. I'm saying it's possible then that the plane's flying yeah and he's able to just talk yeah, but they're talking through me. I'm Raphael Pacheco 20:07 I'm not at the fire. I'm also not the NFL running back. I'm the student pilot from Mexico City, Mexico. I am fire and ice simultaneously within me heat and cold. They co-exist within my soul. What are you saying? It's not what I'm saying. It's what he said. They're saying they're saying this through, you know, saying like he could have been 20:35 that carbon oxide poisoning to me sounds like this is what this is interesting. So anyway, so he as a professional pilot. Okay, first of all, you're not a professional pilot. You're an amateur pilot. That is too sad to fly too sad to fly. My wings got clipped by my they said. They said we theory though. That's my working theory right now. Let me hear what the aliens said and I can I could tell you they said we don't matter much. 21:04 nor where we came from nor where we're going. Just know that we are beings from this universe to which you belong. Our planet is many light years away, but I'll repeat that before it becomes confusing. We're physically the same as you. I repeat that in all races in the universe are physically the same. So we really wanted to know that like we're not any different. You and is a transcript. We have we have audio files of yeah. We have the audio files. This is in Spanish. I was going to play it to you, but it's on Spanish. We don't know uh 21:34 I mean, I'm a professional translator. You've been doing duolingo. I'm on a try. Sure, right. I even do a duolingo. Let's hear what they say. Yeah. Okay, let's try. Hold on. We are going to play it. Alex, you good for the audio. All right, here's here's it's going to end up. It's going to sound rough, but here let me see. Ready? Yeah, 21:54 What do they say? He said no one likes us. We're so lonely. We're so we're such losers. He said, what if I told you I have a crush on someone I know him? That's what he said. 22:25 Ha ha ha ha! 22:29 honestly, honestly English or Spanish. I couldn't understand a word that audio was saying the audios. That's crazy. So is he yelling then so it sounds well yeah he's talking through a weird voice. He's honestly what it's described as is it's honestly what's that guy that you always talk about where the are but char yeah he's doing the bashar voice. Can you do the bashar voice? 22:54 Hello, I am Bush. We are much like you physically. We're all kind of hot. You know, what if the aliens were like, we're physically just like you, we have healthy PMIs like you, but by you, mean just the hot ones. 23:20 not the agos were not like your agos and we are not like your ugly people. We're like your hot people think of the hot that's us. So okay, so yeah. Okay. And how long is the communication go on? There's a forty two minute transcript of him and this tower guy that sounds like a carbon oxide poisoning to me. Then I mean maybe I do yeah, maybe 23:50 They tell the guy from the tower, they say, hey, they're watching. We've been watching humanity from the skies and we need to tell you that you need to change or you're going to cause an irreversible global catastrophe. And he said that it's that your race is so strange because of all the races in the universe. Remember, we're all physically the same. Sure. But he said of all the races in the universe, they're the only ones who kill each other. And he says that you are 24:18 you are creating weapons to the scale of anything, not like anything else in the universe, because we're not out here killing each other. And he's like, you're going to destroy yourselves if you continue down the path that you're on. Right. So very stereotypical, like alien warning that you hear from these things. Sure. Sure. Sure. And the tower agent is very skeptical. And he's so he comes back and said, yeah, if you are so advanced, then how are you? Oh, yeah. 24:48 okay. It's like if you're so advanced, then why are you speaking Spanish right now? Like how and racist? What are you talking about? That's what he said. He said he said if you're so advanced, why are you speaking Spanish? He said, shouldn't you be speaking some like alien language? Oh yeah, I thought you were like learn English you Dom. Oh, that's not what he was saying at all, and so they said that they're able to speak any human language and he said he said prove it. I'm trilingual 25:16 and so he's but he says that in German, tri-lingual always in German. Yeah. So he says that in German and then they responded German and then he started. He asked him a question in English. They respond in English and so then he's like, oh, that's kind of cool. Actually, I'm pretty impressed. You're at least tri-lingual and so he's starting and this is all on the testimony of one air traffic controller. Well, we have the transcript from the like the like log from tower. Okay, so 25:46 ah They then continue on and they tell them you're not alone in this universe. There are many other races um and there are some that we're actually keeping away from you. And so it sounds like these guys are like in charge. The things that they're and it says, we're watching you. And so he says, like, why don't you come and like show us your spacecraft? Like to like give us something to where we can believe you and not just think like this is just some weird, like hallucinating pilot. um And they say we would. 26:14 but you would just kill us. He's like, you're an aggressive. 26:21 true. He says was the last alien showed up in a fight bang, bang, bang, bang, Yeah, they're like, they're like, you would shoot us down. What's the last time you've been in a fight? Okay, and so he they, they say, yeah, you would just shoot us down and he's like, yeah, you're probably right. That is actually probably what we would do and so then the the conversation kind of goes flat. Like they'd stop responding to his questions and answer anything else to say 26:52 And so he continues like kind of poking them trying to get them to say something 27:00 tower to aliens, so 27:09 When was the last time you guys had a fight? 27:13 it's like it's like I think I find it made them mad with that one shoot, shoot, tower to aliens. Y'all do drugs. That was the day or program in Tennessee. Y'all do drugs, please. How's our comes in the classroom? I was doing drug. 27:38 they were housing Tennessee last this hotel. So I'm at this hotel. There's a barbecue place next door right and I can see the smoke coming up from the thing. That's how you was like a real barbecue place or like a well. That's what I'm saying. That's how you know it's a good rest. Yeah is if you see because like I drove past an Arby's today and it's like we smoke the meat. There's no smoke coming out of the top of the Arby's yeah, but like this is a barbecue place next to this hotel. It's got a smoke stack coming out the whole thing right and so I was like dang. I'm gonna get some barbecue 28:08 this. So I did my workout, got a shower, got dressed. I got, uh, it's, it's right next to the hotel. So I walked to it and it's not a barbecue place. It is a funeral home. 28:24 Yeah, that was a crematorium that I was looking at and 28:33 What makes it worse is the front desk. They have a shuttle. They take you around town. The girl, the friend does like, do you need to ride somewhere? I said, no, I'm to walk next door and get some food. 28:50 she was like, excuse me, like what I said, I'm going to walk the place next door and grab a bite. I'm going to get me some barbecue. 29:00 I present truth. 29:12 yikes yeah well anyway, it's a memory I'll have forever. Yeah, I think I was stupid. I felt walking. I was like there's no cars here or none cars here. Oh, there's one car is long. There's a long car. There's a horse man here. It's cool branding. We sick 29:35 were you able to get in? No, I wasn't sure. I wasn't stupid enough to walk all the way to the front door. I rounded the corner, saw the hearse thought hold on and then I saw the sign and said something something funeral home and I went oh and I walked back and I told the person the front desk. I said that's not a restaurant. I didn't know I was a funeral home. You told 30:04 because I needed her. No, I'm not crazy. I go bad and I said I will take that shuttle ride. What did she say? Yeah, I was like, I prefer like, do you guys got like a graveyard? I like my food, a real barbecue. I like a little too well done there. That's crazy. Yeah, I felt really dumb. Oh my God. No, I joked with the girl at the front. I said, I said, Hey, I thought 30:30 I said I saw the smoke. I said I feel really stupid. She was like, yep, she said you need a shuttle and I was like yes, she did. She did a joke with you though. She didn't joke back. That sucks too. There's no way out of that too. If you, if you, if you try to joke with somebody and they don't joke back, you just got to sit in that, know, and you're just like, 30:51 like you try to go with somebody and then they go and this is really mean man. This is a really traumatic time of my life and I can't believe you would make a video about this and a whole song and like that was something that I really struggled with and then you got to be like no corey asbury. It's fine don't you feel it's funny. It's a little joke. It's like a little funny thing we're doing okay, so it's like radio silent. This guy thinks he made the aliens mad. I have their feelings somehow. 31:16 So he's freaking out for a different reason. He doesn't go, oh, we got a pile of those lost their mind. They're flying in the clouds above the mountains. He goes, I've made the aliens mad. 31:29 Hey, if you love the show, a great way to serve support is by getting some merch. We got lots of great stuff. I'm going to showcase some of it right now. This is like our little tilling QVC. You can get a it's not a call. It's a podcast sweatshirt. Very sweet. The nice thing about this is no one knows what podcast you're talking about. So you wear it in public and you can tell them about your lord and savior to a podcast. We also got the this is one of my favorite things we've ever made. The fiddle off fest hoodie. It's got uh the devil. 31:58 playing a fiddle. It's not really the devil's a skeleton. And then all of the bands on the back of it like it's a festival. But spoiler alert, these aren't bands. These are jokes from episodes. So worth checking out. And this is one of my favorite things we've ever done. This is for the real fans. This is an old one. We've got a Tim Stones get well quick trick shirt. And it's very cool. We've got some really good designs. Darren is good at designing stuff. So support his dream. No one will hire him as a designer, but you can by buying his merch. 32:26 It's our merch, but it's his designs. so leave a comment, say, Jared, you're good at this. um We like your art. He really needs it. He needs your support so bad. Please make him feel better about it and buy some merch. It helps make this show keep happening. You can tell people about how much you love this show with it. So. 32:50 Did you hear it? Did you hear what I said? Yeah, you're to do a two minute merch ad. wasn't a two minute merch ad. Oh, Jaren's a good designer. Give him a high five. Make him feel good about his art. 33:04 and then you're going to make them listen to two minutes of ads. We got to do all that and then it's going to be like back to school this fall like 33:14 I don't want to be. I hate skippable ads. They're not skip. They are skippable. Yeah, you too. Bring you leave all this in that 33:28 That's what he thinks. I think he is tracking the flight and being like I've lost contact with fly. I still got a murder. I need to make contact there. Obviously I'm sure maybe I'm wrong. I haven't seen this ATC agent. Is that what they go by? They go by agent ATC operative. What do you what do they call operator? What's that? What's the like term for a person and that runs in tower that talk of it? So the ATC hobbit is like a uh 33:58 I was called 34:04 at of it is feeling like I need to track this flight. You thank you. Okay, thank you. uh The track in the fight, I think what's probably happening. I haven't seen any like interviews with them, so I don't know what they were sure sure sure sure, but I'm sure they were like someone's crazy in this fight and it showed up out of nowhere and we got to keep contact with them as they're trying to make contact, but they're not hearing anything back for two minutes. Yeah well for four to two minutes, they're on the conversation and then it just ceases. 34:34 And this was at, I do have a timestamp of when the conversation ended at 1129 AM. So they were on call with them for since like, what would that be like? 1040 something. Sure. 1030 something. uh And now all of a sudden they just stopped in 47. Yeah. They just stopped getting contact with the aliens. And so they're still trying to make contact, but they're not getting anything. And then all of a sudden out of nowhere, they're here. 35:02 different voice come from that same frequency. Oh, and it's and then now it's Raphael is him saying help. I'm Raphael, but check out Perez student 82 from wherever he was from. Sure. And so then they say, hey, is there anyone else on the plane with you? Because they immediately are that's a different voice. You got you got you. Yeah. And he was like, no, I'm alone and I don't know how I got here. And so then they guide him to where the he landed the plane successfully. He did the whole thing. He lands. Yeah. 35:32 and uh obviously while this whole thing was underway, tower contacted the authorities. They were standing by at the that's why they arrested immediately. They arrested him because they're like, yeah, this is a crazy person and this is the seventies. This is when everyone was crashing planes into stuff and just crashing planes into the ground and so they arrest him. They question him. He has nothing to say and reporters then ask. Well, they actually they ship him back on a bus and they send a different flight. 36:00 pilot to fly the plane back to the fight school because it's obviously not his plane right. So some other pilot flies the plane back. He gets sent back on a bus, speaking of buses on the way here. I tried to say this in the last episode. You cut me off. You wouldn't let me say it, so somebody waited a week for me to finish this thought, uh but speaking of weird, someone else had to play back and so did that person also get abducted by aliens. Speaking of weird, so no, Tim, 36:29 No, no, them wait another week. I won't remember. I won't remember. I I won't care then either. I don't know if you're going to care now honestly. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, 36:58 I want the back way here today because Jared and I were not sure which way was faster. Oh, that's not true. That's not true. Jaron was sure which way was faster. Tim was just over confident that the other way would be even close to the same for some reason. It's clearly double the length of time. I pulled into the parking lot and I was so confident. I beat him and then I saw his car and I was so mad, but he was on the back way. 37:28 a like you drive through these neighborhood roads on the back way yeah, which honestly surprisingly nice homes down that road, a really nice neighborhood back to his riding their bikes had to run them over. They were in the road. were in the way and jared said we have bring any laws. We did say anything about the he did water. When we were leaving, I was like I because he's like okay, we're leaving Panda Express. We're going come to where we record 37:51 and then and I said to him I said okay, but it can't be a situation where we're like speeding like I'm not going to hit the main road and go sixty in the forty like I'm going to do and I actually hit all four track. I hit every single this could not have taken me longer on this route and I still won by almost double the time. Yeah, I pulled up and he wasn't even in his car anymore. You know what happened though? I actually started a timer and I forgot to stop it. 38:20 So it's taken you a really long time actually now that I think about it. Wow. 38:27 two hours. Jared's been driving for two hours. No, the only reason I brought this up. I didn't even mean to tell that whole story. The reason I brought this up is on that road is a normal neighborhood road, normal houses with normal size driveways and one of the people in their driveway pulled literally all the way up to their house is like a nineteen eighty five like city bus that clearly hasn't moved in years and it takes up the entire driveway. 38:56 and I just don't know like I don't know if this like the idea is like oh, I'm going to turn this into an RV or if they bought it a long time ago and they have it a city bus like a city bus and they just have this bus and I honestly it just it took me back to high school because in high school I wanted so bad to be a bus driver. Oh, I want it so bad for my first car to be a school bus. You said so bad or and that's dumb 39:26 and I didn't know about CDL at the time and so I got very how would it be to drive to school in a school bus and I priced them out and I found one that was like this price them out. I found a you did not know about CDL enough that you were shopping for used school buses. I've had a used school bus that would have cost the same amount as the car that I was looking at before and so was like. Oh, this is totally achievable did not realize that 39:53 fuel was going to cost way more and maintenance was going to cost way more. And then also I needed a special license to drive it. But yeah, I wanted that so bad. And honestly, I don't know if I'm allowed to say this out loud, but maybe I shouldn't. Maybe I shouldn't. 40:13 that's personal growth. You saw mom. What you just witnessed was a white man in front of a podcast microphone go well. That makes it sound like I was going to say something worse, but we'll never know, but we'll never know. No, now I have to say it now. Now that you made it so bad, you don't have to say what I was gonna say. That's what's beautiful about it. We live in a free country. 40:41 So when I worked at the church, there was when I worked at the church, we did this like back to school event where we donated backpacks and we were a mega church. So we got a school bus that you would drop the backpacks off in. We could have just like, you know, got a bunch more backpacks, but it's cooler to have the school bus out and drop all the backpacks at the school bus when you donated them. And so I everyone knew I wanted a school, but I got to drive the bus. 41:09 Yeah, I and I would drive the bus around the building and I was illegal because I don't have a CDL, but I don't know if I can put into words how much I loved driving that school bus. Do you guys see that? Tim closed his eyes and was like 41:25 opening up the steering wheel is big. Did it have one of those little you know and I actually look down on drivers who have the little knob yeah. You know on we we had different ones every year. uh One year we did have the knob. I like a guy who just goes yeah yeah yeah they're big and then yeah you got the door that the door opener thing. Sometimes they're up here is great. 41:51 I loved it side. It's weird how much I'd love to try a school bus, so so Rafael's on a bus. Yeah, so Rafael takes a bus back to Mexico City and all these reporters are interviewing. Was any of that worth it? These reporters are interviewing. Sometimes you watch this podcast, you listen to it, you're on your drive right now and like was any of this worth your time? No, 42:18 not at all. So the Rafael gets back to Mexico City and all these kind of buses were you looking at blue bird school buses. I didn't I don't remember. I was bringing the brain sixteen, so Rafael gets back to Mexico City and everybody's interviewing him. Tell me what that says. You've done to a lingo 42:42 Yeah. 42:47 All these newspapers are interviewing ah Raphael. I was alone in the plane and they came to me. They embodied me through my ears. said, hello. Through my mouth, they said, they are listening. 43:06 through my eyes. If you're an audio listener, this is like there's like nine. This is not even and I only know here's the problem about doing duolingo. I know like every other word in this thing, but it's not enough to put it together. You know, you're like oh well, just tell me the words you know. Just read the words. You know, no, I'm joking. I'm joking. uh Well anyway, 43:38 I see duolingoes hiring a new social media manager. You see the salary for it. No, it's the salary. I think the salary range is one seventy to two ninety for the mix. Social media manager. Yeah, impressive. You think you could do it as well as duolingoes social media? I think it's low honestly for them for what they for the for what they've Yeah, sure. The value it's added to the company. I think it's low anyways. Yeah, so he gets all these inner newspaper interviews and every newspaper interview is the same. It's like they ask him what happened and he's like I don't know 44:08 He's like, I really do think that he had like a medical emergency and like passed out or something and was just talking in his half sleep for a bit. And I do they inspect the plane. Nothing was wrong with the plane, I guess. I haven't seen any reports about anything, any inspections done. So I don't know. I would assume that they would. We didn't, I don't know. This is an interesting story because it was highly publicized and it was kind of like shut down. 44:37 sure it didn't happen and then it got re released in like their equivalent of a FOIA report. Well, the whole thing is like you don't want for forty two minutes. Like let's say let's say there, you know, obviously there's no aliens right, but let's say I don't know if obviously is the word obviously there's no aliens. So here we go. Potentially for sure there's no aliens and so we see here we go. Okay, well this crazy guy just had a plane for an hour like what's worse. There's no there's releasing that information at the top. There's no benefit 45:07 You know yeah, I mean kinda yeah, but yeah, it would almost be better to be like he had a medical emergency. We followed the flight. We got him down safe. This is a miracle of flight aviation safety. You know yeah, I suppose yeah, maybe and I do think there is merit to what you're saying because this is nineteen seventy six. This is the height of the cold war. Everyone's talking about how we're going to nuke each other and I mean Roswell has already happened and so like the alien 45:36 storylines out there right, so it very well could be like in the back of his psyche sure that these things are possible, um but and I mean honestly he's probably a lonely guy, so he's saying you are you saying there might be a world where he just he just broke and maybe in the other side too is maybe he just broke under the pressure of his first solo flight. Yeah, maybe maybe what I just had a psychotic break. Well, what I was saying was if if what you're saying is 46:06 correct that there was some sort of carbon monoxide issue going on and he did like pass out or fall asleep or something. I do think that there's enough going on in the world at the time where this could be explainable. It's like his subconscious was sure saying these type of things. It's not so obscure. also what I'm saying is like he didn't pass out, but if he's if he's loopy enough that it's like he's high altered state, you know, yeah, and he's like, well, that's what they're telling me. They say this and 46:35 you know, and maybe it's one of those things where it starts as like a miss, like a sentence messes up where he's like, well, that's what I, that's what they said and they're they yeah, they yeah, you know, and he's in too deep. He's got to double down. No, but I'm saying like way out of it. You know, this person's on drugs, essentially. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, there's something there that then your brains filling gaps being like, yeah, they yeah, they interest, you know, 47:04 that's that makes the most sense to me. Honestly, yeah, I think that's a really interesting theory. I think I haven't seen anyone say anything anywhere near just got to put me in the red. It's I'll handle all this. I'll handle all of them. I think that's a theory, but I also think it's more likely that it's aliens, of course, and I do think that it's more likely that we're all the same and we're the only ones who kill each other. Do you think the aliens look like us? Yeah, we're the hots 47:33 Not you. You felt that though right. You saw us high five and then for a moment we were the hots and then he went ha ha and you saw it away. I wish we had the budget for uh for just decay of your body in your face and ha ha Robert could do that. You know, spend a couple hundred bucks on it. Who cares Robert? 48:07 we're going to get the invoice for that and you're going to gosh does worse as said it. That's the whole story that like there was no cons did he ever become pilot. Oh he kicked out of school. He could have become pilot anymore, and so he said this event ruined his career because he was trying to be like an actual course like it wasn't. This wasn't this wasn't like you or it was just a hobby. I this was a career path for him. What are you going to do? We know 48:30 I don't know what he went on to actually do, but it wasn't fly sure, so he never got to do that again. That was those last flight first solo last flight all together, so he was deemed probably medically unfit to fly. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, so I'm pretty confident aliens. um He could have fought it it was if they did that whole carbon ox. I think what's also interesting is like when your brain is like at that like 48:57 whoo, you know, kind of thing. You're over the mountains and you hit that eight thousand, you know, ah and then ah the devil shows up and he says they've been looking for you and he goes, well, we've been looking for they and then pulls out of fiddle and goes and because like he didn't have the skill. He wasn't able to do it when he was like normal, but like we was looking for they 49:26 When's last time you got in a fight? Hey, when's the last time you got in a fight and or shared an episode of this podcast? Thanks for listening to till to Dylan. If you like this episode, you want more of it. We did a whole episode on the barefoot bandit who stole a plane, right? Didn't the barefoot bandit plan? Yeah, plain. And you can watch next week's episode for on Patreon right now. So thanks for being here and we hope you enjoy the show. Now we're going to do the after the fiddle, which is what Patreon supporters get whenever they're done, not done, but you know,


In 1976, a student pilot named Rafael Perez took off on what was supposed to be a simple solo flight from Mexico City. The plan was to circle a nearby lake, make a brief landing in an open field, and return to the airport. It was meant to last about an hour. But something went very wrong. Moments after takeoff, … Read More

The Truth About Dare and Drugs | DARE EP 293

09-30-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Happy to be here by the way. I don't believe you. Okay, 00:09 must have an inje creamy. The rest of the second make is forty grams of protein for only three hundred and eighty calories, but you know what has a really bad protein to calorie ratio crack cocaine. 00:30 Things I learned last night. 00:39 Hey, have you ever heard of actually? You know what I was gonna say? What I was gonna ask you if you ever heard of this, but I'm just gonna show you a picture and you tell me if you have ever heard of this sure and you have to describe it also to the listen. All right, okay. Have you ever heard of this? Okay, so for the audio listener, m it's a what is a ninety six convertible sports car and it's a you know painted like a police car. 01:07 can't tell which town of police it is, but it says to resist drugs and violence and then the word Dore the D A R E do do. How do you say it, Tim Dare Dare? Yeah, we're talking about the dare program. Yeah, we're talking about dare. Okay, so did day are we going to find out in this episode? Did dare 01:37 make things worse. Yeah, we're going to find out at this episode. Okay, okay, okay, okay, but also was there an excuse for police departments to buy cool cars and wrap them in this so they could have a giant person, not a giant person, a normal person dresses a giant lion sitting in the back. Was that the whole premise that was the bag? you go. Yeah, the mascot is a is a lion, four fingers because they I did it and then 02:05 What do you say? What's the back seat? Was he those are sideways seats? Oh okay, those are sideways. each other. Sorry for me being stupid. Those are obviously sideways seats. Why would I not know that? Is this a Mercedes? I can't tell what a Pontiac Trans Am. That's what I'm wondering. Is this like like like this is the kind of car that you make a convertible and everyone season to like you made that a convertible. No, I'm pretty sure that comes as a convertible. Yeah, that's what I'm saying and I think I feel you see it and you're like why is that car a convertible? 02:36 Oh, Pontiac made it a convertible. that's what I'm saying. It's got it. It comes that way. But everyone's like, should that be a this is the day or vehicle? Yeah, this is a dare. A dare police car. Cool rims. I will say that for sure. Sure. Right off the front. I spent a lot of time on the rims. That's for sure. We don't have a lot of other content to get to, I guess. He was mad at me 40 minutes later. Clock it right now. 02:58 clock it 40 minutes, 40 minutes from now, Tim's gonna go a lot to cover. He's gonna be like, hey, man, we got a lot to get to and then remember that at minute. I don't know one, two and a half two minutes and thirty seconds. He was like, oh, it's got some pretty cool rims and pretty crazy. Pontiac made this a convertible. Just remember that because I think about it every day. He told me I was even like, I I got to sneak some bits into this. I'm gonna try to some funny stuff. 03:27 and he said save it for the second episode we record today because this one's got a lot of content. That's the dad. I did not say I did not say save all your bits. You could do some. Oh, you know what he said? He said the next one doesn't have a lot of content. So just so you know, next week's episode probably sucks. Check it out on page right now. 03:46 all right. I didn't say don't do any bits though. I want you to do some bits in this episode. I want all your bits of this episode, but I want some of your bid safe for the next episode. Nothing's funny about drugs. 04:00 cigarettes are cool though. We love those if you're if you're gonna, you want to do your a bit. I want you to do a story. Okay, Jaron Jaron's energy today is weird. Jared's been doing tell him about your little thank you bit that you started before this my thank you bit manners. Whenever I hand you something, I do expect you to go. Thanks 04:27 is that we turn on face is exactly what I face a human reaction. Oh yeah, such a good bit dude. It's so funny that you expect me to thank you for stuff dude. Yeah, your Jaren's been doing this funny bit where he sees me in public and he waves oh a moron. Put your arm down, put that arm down you psycho. All right, so now it's minute four 04:52 fifteen and like in in thirty eight minutes, Tim's going to be like wow man, we lost a lot of time. We got to freaking go. Just remember that Tim was like waving's bad. I didn't say that you just put your hand down unless it's lifting a cigarette to my house. That's what Tim said. Put that on a put that on a dare program sign. Huh? 05:14 Okay, so tell me about the their program. Yeah, we grew up in the nineties. Did they have it at your Lutheran school? They did not have it. I was gonna say it, but when I was in grade school we had it. If you don't know the dare program is the program is it is when the is when a police officer from your brand. I feel like teenagers right now it's a brand. They wear their shirts like oh do they really like it's a brand so 05:37 then they don't know the trauma we went through when you're sitting in third grade and a police officer from your town in full uniform comes in and tells you that any day you're going to get kidnapped on the way home as I remember that talk where he was like don't talk to anybody but your teacher look at her face memorize it because someone's going to try to dress like her and convince you that it's her, it's not mrs. Campbell. All right, that is a predator trying to take you home in Mount Vernon, Missouri, because they really thought that someone who 06:06 was a man could wear a wig and be like hey, I'm your teacher, Miss Campbell, and then we'd be like and then kids are dumb enough to be like yeah, you are. You do look like the person I just get in your ban nine hours a day with 06:21 I didn't know you drove a rusty and speaking of rusty weird vans on the way here. I took that. So what also would happen is they would bring drugs to the school and they would go. Here's what meth looks like. They actually did that and you would go oh and they said don't ever look at one again. Yeah, don't make eye contact with this man. If you look at it, you get addicted and then they would go to the kid 06:48 probably most likely to get addicted and they were just dangling in front of his face. You want this mess, don't you? And he's in second grade and he's like, I guess and they're like, that's the wrong answer. They beat the heck out of that kid in front of everybody in the class. He just a lesson. Yeah, they're like, see, look what he looks and the whole time he did it. He's like, hurts me more than it hurts him. 07:10 and there was crazy and then all the way out he planted that kids with drugs and arrested him. It was crazy. I remember do there's so many things about the day or program that are so like there's this like little you know how your memory just has little moments. Yeah, I remember one time in this had to be middle school, so six or seventh grade. There was a trouble kid in our in our grade um 07:36 which is probably different than the Lutheran school trouble kid. Your Lutheran school trouble kid just said cuss words every once while true. Ours was like a hardened criminal dude. He had like he had like the mohawk and eyeliner in sixth grade. You're like yeah, you know and what the dare officer put handcuffs on him. Oh, and then this kid has been arrested. I think before at this point and did the thing where he pulled it underneath his butt and then pulled the handcuffs underneath his legs and then had the handcuffs in front of him. Yeah, 08:05 and then was trying to get out of the handcuffs the whole time and like got pretty close and I don't think it made that day officer very happy that a sixth grader was usurping his authority in this class interesting, but I always remember the officer handcuffing that six that sixth grader interesting and it wasn't like he was doing it to be like ah you know shut up. Don't talk while I'm talking. He was just he picked a random kid to splay the handcuffs on 08:36 and it just happened to be the kid who yeah, I was like, it's like it's probably this kid. This kid's probably he profiled that kid. He actually probably has arrested that kid. He's like, I think that let me it again. Yeah, you know, interesting. Okay, the whole thing was a ploy to get that kid. They started the dare program as a sting operation to get. I think his name is Harley. Interesting. Well, anyways, 09:00 On June 5th, 1968, Robert F. Kennedy was shot at the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles, California, and this is how the story needs to begin. 09:14 I don't know if there's anything funny about an assassination. Why are you laughing? I don't anyways, so right now, right now, so why don't you dare to take it seriously? Okay, I'll take that there. So on June 5th, wait, Robert F Kennedy was shot at the Ambassador Hotel right in Los Angeles, California by John Wilkes booth. Nailed it. No, by a guy named Sir Hans or hon 09:44 I'm crazy. I actually don't think hear that. Here's the deal. There's a big conspiracy about it. Maybe there was a second shooter. We don't know. I know who did it. 09:57 What we do know for sure is there were two thousand three hundred photos taken at the event. There were wait. Are we not talking about the dear program? We are. Why are you setting up an R K? we do now is that two thousand six hundred and eighty three photos now from this angle? There are a hundred and seventy one 10:22 Why do we not have any from this angle? There was a photographer we can see in this shot. We can see the photographer standing over here. Here's the thing. There's no way someone could have made a shot from over here. There has to be a second shooter. What are you talking about? What I'm saying is there are over two thousand photos taken at the event. The LAPD at the event seized the cameras of every photographer that was there. 10:50 Okay, they took all the film because they're like, this is evidence sure of this assassination at the time attempt, but he later passed away. So the actual assassination after reviewing all of these photographs at some point in the investigation, LAPD decides the best thing to do is to burn all the photographs from the event, uh which is sketchy. And so 11:20 In the wake of this, the Los Angeles chief of police loses his job and a new chief of police is named a guy by the name of Daryl Gates. And Daryl Gates is, mean, on one hand, product of his environment. Obviously there's some corruption. Obviously. If they burned all those photographs, there was clearly what we know for sure is there was clearly a narrative that LAPD was trying to spin of the event. 11:50 We don't really know why, but we do know that they got in trouble for it and the chief of police was removed because of it. Okay. And so Darrell Gates was named the new chief of police and he did some uh significant things uh in his tenure as chief of police. He, he became, or he invented the SWAT team, a strong start to his, his career. He was the chief of police. 12:20 uh during the uh LA riots after the murder of Rodney King. Yeah, the did they kill him or did they just arrest him? Yeah. And maybe I don't remember that story really well. They killed a running king story. Did they kill him? But well, the fact that you called me LA riots instead of the Rodney King riots is interesting. uh But so he's he's not doing good things then. No, yes, no, yes, absolutely not corrupt. 12:47 in the middle of his career, right smack in the middle of his career in the late seventies early eighties. He ran a group called the P did, which is the public, what's his role? He is the chief police chief of police yeah, the LAPD. He puts together the P did the public disorder intelligence division, public disorder, intelligence, okay, and the idea was pretty simple. He said you look drug abuse is an issue in our schools. It would be sweet if I had 13:17 a spy network in the schools and so he I'm telling you, I knew the second officer Lacey came into our classroom. I said this guy's a narc. I tried to tell you their kids. I was in kindergarten and I was like he's a narc. Don't trust him. He literally did 21 jump street. He had undercover cops that went and were high schoolers and went to high school and were looking for the drug dealers in the high school was the concept. Literally 13:47 were there drug dealers in the high schools? I mean, I don't know. I haven't seen like reports that said that most likely probably some and we're talking about drug dealers. Are we talking like it's marijuana? It was that sort of saying like let's be real like it's not like yeah. This thing happens yeah, the a cl you finds out and they're like hey, I don't think you're allowed to do that and so this ends up becoming this massive court case and the 14:15 US government, the federal government shuts down the PD ID. They're like, yeah, you can't just spy on kids in schools and you can't send undercover officers in there without a reason in advance. Like you have to have evidence that there's yeah, there's got to be to send an undercover officer into the sure. And he was so mad about this. He was like, I had one of the best spy networks in the public school system. Anyone's ever had in the school system and the federal government shut it down. And he was very, very frustrated about 14:43 okay, so he spent some time trying to figure out how can he replace his spy now and he found out about the L. school board had like a program called the smart program. They've been running for how long he's been chief of police at this point. I mean at this point this is I believe it was the early nineties when they shut down his PDI, so he's been the chief of police for the chief police for a while. He ran the PDI for a long time, so I see how it's relevant that we started at RF case 15:13 No, that's how he became chief of police. Okay, that's how he got here. Okay, and it's important because it paints the background that he was already a high ranking official in the polo. Okay, okay, okay, so he was burning the photos, a part of burning all these fun yeah yeah he's doing some sketchy stuff as one trying to illustrate and then he started the SWAT team sketchy started uh the PID sketchy. The PID gets shut down and he says what we do. 15:40 and so he finds out about the smart program, which is an L. school district program to combat drug abuse in their schools yeah, and they have been running for years and this was run by the actual school board and they had brought in and partnered with local universities to pilot programs that could actually make a difference sure and they had attempted uh many years earlier a program where they would go into the schools 16:09 and they would equip teachers to educate the kids about drug abuse yeah and the dangers of it. Why you shouldn't do it and what they found is that this program was not effective at all. It actually led to an increase in drug abuse in their schools and they think the reason for that is because it made it seem kind of cool. Look at this picture of these teens on drugs just like a house party and they're like 16:36 and it's like look at these these idiots throwing away their future and kids are like those kids are pretty hot. So by the early nineties they had come up with a peer to peer program that they were running that they were seeing much more success with and it was actually having really good results like there was they were saying drug abuse in the schools drop while they when they were using this peer to peer program and the concept was essentially you would pick a handful of kids. 17:04 to be your ambassadors of drugs or mad. 17:11 I remember this happening at my school to you can tell me if I made this up in my head. I don't think I did did your school do a fake drunk driving accident. What do you mean? What do mean? Can you describe this to because I don't your school do a fake drug? Okay, so I'm not crazy this welcome to public school. Here's why we there was a day and I don't know if this is what you're describing. There was a day where they pulled a drunk crash car into our parking lot and we're like this could be you and it was 17:40 it was broken. They, I think that might have been how this idea started and they were like the kids aren't getting it. We need to act it out okay, and so they had someone sit in the car and be dead and then they had other teens freak out and be like oh my gosh and like do this whole crisis play and the fire department would roll up and they would try to save that person and like you would see people on the phone sobbing to their mom. 18:10 being like oh my gosh, you know, Jennifer just died crying on their phone and we're all just standing out front of the school and they so they got just they got Jennifer. She was a theater student. They were like yeah, they're all ready for the role of your. I think it's real. None of us are out there being like are we watching Jennifer die right now? I thought no. I they were like we're going to crash on the way into class today. No, no one's going to know that might be where it is now. That's what I'm saying is that when we got in it just it just 18:38 seemed like uh anyway. We were all out front of the school and we just had to stand there and watch their little play, so it was. It was more like a there was the ding. Well, the student body please report to the parking lot. Well, it was like and then jennifer was like well, our bell was like and then they should go there. All students please report to the front of the school and we would go out there. 19:01 Oh, this is please dead in the car. Everyone's got like, what's Jennifer doing in the car? Jennifer, the principal come out and go, okay, guys, we have a presentation of the local police department before we do, please turn around to the flag and we're all going to say the word allegiance together. So the whole school is out there going and then like some kids like first in the world, like I with all this makeup and she's got a hand. 19:25 I pledge allegiance. And then we're standing there cars behind us at this point. We're like, I pledge allegiance to the Republic for which it stands. Indivisible with liberty. 19:42 and then the guy who was supposed to start the car on fire actually did it a little too early. The pledge just got to the they forgot there's a case of fireworks in the trunk. It really went off the rails pretty quick. No, I mean like but your school did like there was a presentation. Yeah, it was a whole thing. It was a whole. I forget they call it something. They call it the first dead in the parking lot presentation. The Jennifer's dead in the put hey guys, it's time for well this week we've got 20:11 just this is the staff. This is explaining to the teachers what the week is going to be like all right, it's like all right, my everybody gets home coming. We guys Monday's just making sure you guys know that we're going to do an all staff lunch. We're catering really grateful for you. It is homecomings on Friday that you know Tuesday is still a day. Other chaperones for that yeah. If you could volunteer, we also do a dog tears next month is we're doing a bake sale on the step 20:39 ah Thursday is the Jennifer's dead in the parking lot day. Does anybody have any questions on how that's going to run? 20:50 No, it is the same as last year. Different Jennifer. Good question. Good question. Yeah, actually, this is this is unfortunate. Last year's Jennifer em 21:01 the the drug driving accident, so it's turns out well. She needed to be the one what this is bad. I'm not proud of her family donated her car. I wasn't trying to go. She got a drunk driving as I was just going. She passed away and you were like yeah and actually she didn't learn a lesson. I wasn't going that round, but you can leave it in. We can leave in because we have remorse. uh 21:31 as long as we feel bad, feel bad about the joke. can stay, but was I don't was that part of the dare program Alex or was that just I feel like that had to have been related, but I yeah, I don't remember that being like directly within the sure assemblies. I feel like it was its own thing for some reason. I feel like it was just, I don't know me so weird. So that's what we did in our town and it definitely had the 21:59 the car that was mangled would get brought and I think and it be in the parking lot for like a week. You know what helped us growing up in a small town with drunk drivers was the tractors can only go fifteen miles. So it didn't really matter. You couldn't ruin your life on fifteen miles an hour. It's true that I don't my shirt. 22:17 Hey, thanks for watching our show. you like it, a great way to help out is by being a Patreon supporter. Doing that helps make this show possible, but it also gets a lot of perks for you. You can get every episode a week early ad free. You get access to a Discord where you can meet a lot of other people who love the show and actually hang out with Jaren and I every month on a hangout. And we're also in that Discord chat all the time, hanging, talking with people, talking about episodes and just random stuff in life. It's super fun. 22:40 We do, there's a way to get birthday messages, a free gift, merch discounts in there. So there's a lot of really great reasons to be a Patreon supporter. You get a lot of benefits out of it. And it also makes the show keep happening. So if that sounds great to you, you can go to support.tilling.com or tilling.com slash support, uh or just tilling.com and search around until you find the links and become a Patreon supporter. really appreciate you doing that. But if not, right back to the episode, right? 23:08 so yeah, Jennifer's dead interesting and the police didn't do anything about it. 23:16 they actually there's like twenty of them there and no one else are out of the car, but they really work crisis actors essentially like that's what it was yeah yeah and I'm very weird. You learned it's like that that viral video right now of the school shooting. Have you seen that Alex God where the police are teaching about a school shooting like it could happen at any moment and a cop comes around the corner and just fires the teachers like one guy tackles him like so 23:45 Alarming. 23:49 I think like the response from all those teachers. It's one of those things. You can't tell if it's a sketch or not because they respond because they responded quick, the correct. they either knew it was going to happen or it's a sketch right or they the teacher did a really good job teaching them what to do yeah ten minutes before this was the end of their day yeah, and they knew how to respond. That's crazy interesting. So the smart program okay switch to the peer to peer program, which the peer to peer program is just high schoolers teach it because I think that also happened in our school. 24:19 was the high schoolers came down and taught us middle schoolers like, hey, it's not cool to party. Yeah. Did your town and I know we're doing tangents. I just want to know if our town was crazy. Did this happen to your school too? No. Okay. We had high schoolers in our town who would go to gas stations and try to buy cigarettes. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then if, and my cousin actually got, Caitlin got a ticket for this. um 24:45 was because she sold cigarettes and was just in a rush. It was a busy morning. I think they do that everywhere. Kid looked old enough and sold them cigarettes, but he was 19 and not 21. So she got it. And then literally the police come in right there, like they freaking Chris Hansen them. They come in and they go, why did you sell cigarettes to that kid? it's like, why didn't you? Cigarettes are cool. Oh, because he's got a beard and a mullet and he sounds like this. So mean, I'm not the first to do it. Because you gave him a state issued fake ID. 25:13 How am I supposed to be able to tell that that was fake? Also dude, it's cool. Also cigarettes are cool. Shut up. You're freaking narc, but like that's an R at our high school. They had a high schoolers who volunteered for it and I never did because I didn't want to get beat up. Yeah, I mean it essentially it was a volunteer program and those kids would go through like the education and then they would be a representative. 25:41 what they told everybody. They're so annoying to they're like I'm an undercover person. Well, you blew it. It wasn't undercover that it was. It literally it was. It was evangelism like they it was like we're going to teach a couple of these kids. They're going to teach all their friends and they're going to teach their friends and then the whole school is good. That's what the peer to peer kind of was the idea and it actually worked because it's like influencers like you the kids who have the most influence in the school and you get them to teach the rest of the school that hey, we don't think this is cool here and then everyone's like hey guys it in 26:10 today we're talking about my must haves and my must nots must have must have is this labooboo or what was it called the boo boo boo must have because everyone's got it. I don't actually like it that much, but everyone else has one, so I had to buy one had to get must not this bag of method. 26:31 must have an inja creamy. The rest of these I could make is forty grams of protein for only three hundred and eighty calories, but you know what has a really bad protein to calorie ratio crack cocaine. 26:51 here's my Amazon finds five must haves and also don't do don't do don't do dope would have been a way better. know what is dope not dope. 27:11 it's a it's a little cup with a handle on it. I can put my mind to ice cream in so that my hand doesn't get cold. Is it useless? Of course, of course, but do I get a high commission on the tick tock shop? You know it, you know it, you what I don't get a high commission on hair, what fit and all 27:29 Don't do drugs. 27:34 Follow for more. 27:38 and then you got the other guy who was like follow for my meth recipes. You know what and what sucks is that he doesn't even include it in the in the post he has it. He hasn't a link in his bio. You gotta go link to the bio mail capture yeah, and then I to him an email. Yeah, yeah, it's a nightmare, so that format having the influencers, the peer to peer program worked the best and they actually saw a decrease in drug abuse in their schools from doing this peer to peer program, and so the smart group 28:08 The smart program was like, hey, we're going to do more of this. We're going to roll it out to more sure. Meanwhile, Darrell Gates is like, I lost all my spies and he's like, I hear about the smart program. I'm going to go talk to them. And so one day after a smart program board meeting, he shows up and he's outside and he runs into some of them in the hall and he's like, hey, you guys still doing that smart program thing? And they were like, yeah, and it's a little different now. We're not doing the thing, the education program. He's like, oh, oh, well, you should do the education program thing again. 28:38 and what if like police officers did it and they're like I don't think that would work very well actually and he was like I think it worked really really good if it was cops doing it. I think it's great because like just imagine you're in third period right it's math and then one of my one of my new teams we actually just named them SWAT. I do what I stand for my geography class got swatted today. That's a new thing people should do so the 29:08 people in the summer. It's like yeah. I think we can pull it off. I think we can just you know send in the SWAT team to the class. This one just regular cops, just regular beat cops will scare these kids scared straight. Yeah, it's the concept and so the but the smart board is like we hate the idea it did not work with teachers and they show him the data and he's like he's like I think it was a gap in it work with cops. Yeah, it would work better with cops. Now know we kids hate teachers, but if there's anything the teens love, it's cop, the police kids really like the police. 29:38 And so smart board pretty much just shuts them down and they're like, we're not going to do it. We're not going to bring you in and we're going to continue doing the program that is actually working. Okay. And so he leaves dejected and he says, I'll start my own program. Where's the next place I could go. So he sits in his car and he opens up Google maps and he says, uh, take me to a place that will let me bring cops to school. And the rotary club comes up and he's like, perfect. So he drives to the rotary club and 30:06 basically tells them his idea and they loved it and so the rotary club is like a lot of business owners and things uh that you don't live there. They are a part of the club yeah yeah. You're not part of it, so he tells them as I sorry he doesn't know our ways. 30:30 So he goes to road club and a bunch of do that bunch of business owners are like oh yeah, we love this idea and so they said yeah, we'll help fund this and so he gets a group of officers. What funding is okay? Yeah, I don't know what funding there is in the beginning. I mean they had to get the graphic design for that that lion true and the cool dare. He means it after himself dare, dare, old dare and that's not why he did it. Here's the thing. 30:58 in interviews with people who worked closely with him at LAPD. They said he's one of the biggest narcissists they've ever met in his life. I'm fairly confident there's no way that dare and Darrell are that close together and that wasn't part of his motivation for coming up with that name and he named it Darrell the lion. Is it isn't not? I don't know. Actually, what I don't remember what the lion's name, what's the hound? You know, talking about the investigative how does that part of dare? I don't think that's part of the dare. Is that just a cartoon? 31:27 Oh, it's Darren, Darren, yeah, which I just don't know that I think about it in eighth grade. I don't think I graduated the dare program. I think you had to write like a paper at the end and I literally was like what are you going to do a way me wait, hold on, hold on, hold yeah. The dog is part of it, isn't it? I don't think it's part of it. Hold, hold your horses though, hold on other horses. 31:56 a a uh 32:26 yeah, a cartoon character play it through. It's a cartoon character from what from the dare program. No, it's it's from an ad. It was the National Crime Prevention Council did this and there was an ad that take a bite up of crime. What year did that launch? Nineteen eighty, so it was around before okay yeah, so this is just like they're like hey, it's a cool thing. We got our lion that 32:55 it'd be like if they were like if they were like hey, you're lighten up and then we have smokey the bear here as well. Different cartoon yeah okay, okay, okay, okay, sure the gruff the time dog, the crime doc, he knows yeah yeah yeah. So yeah, they had to put together these. They obviously had to buy all the drugs to bring to the the schools, so I don't what the funding was. I'm going to be honest. I don't know what the only wasn't this earlier era. 33:24 But they put together a board of directors, a of business owners, and then a handful of cops, the chief of police, obviously, Darryl. And they found a school that was like, yeah, you can try it. And so they went into schools, and we've already described it. They would do assemblies, and they would tell kids how drugs kill you, and you shouldn't touch them. ah it was a scared straight program for drugs. uh I've got a couple pictures of these things happening in schools. Here's one that was highly televised. 33:51 with also the actor from this is us as the cop in this one. This is your joking, but go back why not see who else is in the photo that you just showed? Oh, are you dumb? Maybe that's why it's being filmed. That's probably why there's all that press there is because Nancy Reagan is also in this photo. Yeah, yeah, that's that's pretty fair. 34:18 and he's like it's the actor from this is us more on. It's the first lady. Yeah, the reggans loved this idea. Yeah, I bet here's another one a little bit further down the time. He's wearing a bulletproof vest. This is military police in a classroom full of children. You know I'm talking about. Yeah, you know I'm talking about they have the dare lion, the stuffed lion up on the on the that was in our classroom. Yeah, nothing tells kids not to do this more than 34:47 judged our police aren't people coming in their classroom, um so they did this. What happened in our town too is that uh they send the officer to our school right um and I my sophomore year high school is when we started having a dedicated police officer in the school all the time. Yeah, we didn't have that all through my childhood yeah, but what 35:15 that my small town didn't account for is that there are eight police officers. And so there's a thin thin to choose from. And all eight of these guys you have posted on a public YouTube channel of them getting tased. 35:37 and you guys didn't understand. We understood because we're young. We know how to use computers, how to download those videos, how to remix them, how to put songs behind them. Someone made someone made a of the dare officer. This then the whole thing in my school, it got passed around when I was a sophomore in high school was we didn't like the cop that was hanging out of the school every day and there was he got tased and when he got tased, he sounded like a moose that was dying. You know, talking about music. Yeah, yeah. 36:03 and so someone had taken it and then like a like it was. I need to try to find that video that's incredible. Like it was the way you got that same rhythm reckon remember dude. It was you didn't have to do that. don't I don't don't talk about and then they would just walk away. They would walk by him in the hallway playing a video of him getting taste. That's how 36:33 much they disrespected the police officer that was at our school. That's crazy, so interesting. So what is very interesting about this is they started doing it in the school yeah, and they did the education program. They came up with this curriculum where they went through every drug and you learned how bad it was and then you learned that you go to prison and you scare the kids, but they also 37:02 put together. They had like what was the word for it, a confidential box and so every dear program gave the classroom a confidential dare box and it was kind of like you could drop off your drugs. No, it was kind of like remember a Valentine's Day grow. Oh, drop the Valentine's Day. Everyone's box you could like report yeah, and so if you were like hey, I think someone's doing drugs. You could slide your report in that bucket 37:30 and the cop would come by occasionally and check what was in the bucket and so and it was a big event. They he'd walk in the room and everybody would be like buck it buck it and he'd open it up and then he'd look and he didn't read it and what are talking about in of the whole class? He'd be like Tommy is doing drugs and then he would arrest him in front of all the kids and then time like no no, I'm not. It really was like it was trying to teach kids like this is what a jury of your peers is right and so like then 37:59 You pull the kid up in front of the class and then we walk him through a whole thing and we take a vote at the end of like, you think that he's innocent or guilty? Yeah, I did get an F on our test once. So I wrote my teacher's name, put it in the box as Mrs. Neely is doing drugs. Please bring the cops to school. And she's actually served a $25 for right now. Yeah. Who's learned their lesson now? Yeah. Who do you think got an F? I think she gets out next year. 38:28 hopefully she's a man. I for wrongfully sorry I ruined your life because I was a 38:43 Yeah, I mean it really was. It was a suggestion box that they put in every classroom. The suggestion was, think somebody's using drugs. Well, no, I think there it was a tip line essentially. Yeah, and they even told us to like because it was more than drugs that they walked or like I said, they did the whole like kidnapping thing. Yeah, they taught us about, know, if what abuse looks like, if they, if you're experiencing this at home, you can put this in the car, you know, it was which 39:09 in this is another area, those things where if you think about it for a second, it's like oh, that's a good idea. She give it if you think about it for another second. Yeah, you realize that what's actually what happens is first. These are children. They don't really know what they're talking about, and so like you end up with tips that maybe aren't very right true or inaccurate right, but also sometimes you do get tips that are accurate and what was more common than anything out of these tipot these confidential boxes was kids reporting their parents for drug abuse. 39:38 and what inevitably happens is these kids report their parents, their parents get arrested. They go into foster care because now they don't have someone to care for them and eventually the kid learns that it was their fault. Like technically there's their parents, the fault, the parent did it, but they learned they're the person who made this happen. Well, but also like I remember one time getting really mad at my mom while she was driving because she took a sip of her diet coke and I said you can't drink and drive, you know, so it's like if I told on the 40:07 I was like my mom drinks and drives yeah yeah because you're a kid and you don't understand right yeah exactly, and so these are things where yeah it sounds like a good idea, but in practice what ended up happening is it caused a lot more trauma than was necessary and a lot of these situations. Well, yeah, a majority of them their parents smoked weed sometimes sure. Let's be honest. So it ended up being a traumatic thing for a lot of a lot of children kind of unnecessarily. 40:36 and it started to get a lot of blow back. A lot of parents started comparing it to the late Weimar Republic uh because of that the encouraging children. I to say the nine hundred four like yeah, that's oh wow, huh? Yeah, so it was a it was a weird program, uh but it it spread like wildfire and by nineteen ninety it was in like seventy five percent of school districts across America yeah and the could ways opt out of it. 41:05 Yeah, it was it. Here's what's really strange about dare and I still don't understand this. Dare was started as a nonprofit organization, okay, but eventually it went public on the stock exchange and I don't understand how that happened or what or why there was public on the stock exchange. Yes, how it wasn't making. I don't understand. um I do know that there are for profit businesses that sell these 41:35 experiences to schools where they come in and they sell like $20,000 a year. They come in and they'll do this thing for your school and it's like the big event and yeah, we'll kill a kid on the front yard. Yeah. And these are legitimate businesses that do this. Dare obviously had crushed the merchandise game and so they had a lot of great merch after every assembly. They set up a merch table and you could buy the t-shirts and stuff, but they didn't actually sell them. I think they just gave them away. 42:03 but you could buy them at like they sold them at my Walmart. So I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. But they did go public stock. was very straight. So it has a non-profit, but their business model was very interesting because they had their board of directors at the top. Okay. And it was Daryl Gates and then a handful of LAPD police officers and then very influential businessmen billionaires were at the top of this list. A handful of people on the up scene list. 42:33 and they then would, I guess, sell franchises out to local municipalities and they'd be like, Hey, I, you're a cop. the police department would have to license the name. Well, it wasn't even the department. It was police officers, off duty police officers could get a side gig as a dare officer. And so they could then get the dare car and like all the dare merge. 43:03 and they buy all the boxes of the dare stuff and the stuffed animals and then they could go do it in their school and then they could recruit other police officers in their area and in the school district to grow. Okay. And then those police officers could recruit other police officers to do it. And that's why it spreads so fast because it was kind of an MLM and the way they got that model, one of the board members, the founder of Herbalife. 43:33 got it. Okay, like I know how to make he's a hey. I know how to make this work. You get one cop to get another cop to get their cop. I mean within seven cops, you got the whole police force and every cop that exists at all the cops seven seven rounds. It's six degrees of separate, but when you when that cop gets another cop to do it and that cop gets part of their commission is that it did it work the appearance scheme. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The more people you recruited, the more kickbacks you got as the police officer. So you were incentivized to recruit more. was a police officer 44:02 pyramid scheme the whole time. 44:10 Hey, thanks for listening to Things I Learned Last Night. It would do us a huge favor if you could just share this episode with somebody or just share the show. Tell someone you like it. That helps us grow the show. Another way to help us grow the show is to support our merch, which is actually super comfy. We changed to a new merch supplier a couple years ago called Fourth Wall. You can buy our stuff at shop.tillen.com. None of this is a pressure, by the way, but it just really does help us grow the show and it helps, you know, get the word out and people ask me about my hoodie in the airport all the time. So they're really comfy. Would love for you to support the show. 44:40 And either way, thanks for being here. We're glad that we get to do this podcast. 44:48 that okay and and here's the crazy thing from the beginning. The smart day or worked the same way the drug empire works. I mean here's the thing you got to give it to these drug dealers. They know what they're doing. Hey, he gets his cut. They know business and so here's what's crazy. The smart program told dare Darrell Gates when he wanted to do this. They said hey, we know that doesn't work. We've done the research that doesn't work 45:15 we have another program rolling out that works. guys didn't try and he's like, you don't know what you're talking about. And then in 1990, 1992 Indiana University did a study and from that study they, uh, they basically concluded that the dare program subsequently had significantly higher rates of hallucinatic drug use than those not exposed to the program. 45:38 and then I want you to know that's a quote. It was a longer quote that I expected, so I got stuck because I was like I'm still this quote still going and then stupid and then in nine hundred and ninety four say it again without laughing. What's the quote the dare program subsequently had significantly higher rates of hallucinogenic drug use 46:08 than those not exposed the dare program. So kids who went through dare used more hallucinogenic drugs than kids who did not do dare. That's all I need. What Indiana University? I to make some clips out of this. I can't have Tim looking like 46:23 Why is that guy doing the thing that's fingers late? The people on Facebook reels are going to be real mad and then in nineteen ninety four. Oh sorry, if you're an audio listener and you couldn't hear, he was doing the finger quotes, but then he got stuck and he did it like a hundred times, so then it's still doing it. Look like you got a little clause, finger quotes. They he meant it is go more just a 46:52 He got stuck doing it a lot. 46:56 So then in 1994, the research triangle institute did a study and they found essentially the same thing. They said that they um that the program, the kids who were in the program did more drugs than the kids who were not in the program. It was interesting is the dare. They knew that back in ninety four in ninety four. I was still doing there in like two thousand three though. Yes, and so ninety four the dare program uh spent forty one thousand dollars trying to prevent that 47:25 study from RTI getting out. And so they were basically paying off other news organizations and being like, hey, don't run that story. They spent $41,000 getting them to not run that story. Then in 1995, the California Department of Education did a study and they found the same stat. And they said that what they found that while only 10 % of elementary students responded, while only 10 % now they found that while only 10 % of elementary students responded to drug education negatively or indefinitely, 47:55 the figure grew to 33 % of middle school students and topped 90 % at the high school level. Basically the majority of kids thought that the messaging did not change their opinion of drugs at all. And then in 1998, the National Institute of Justice said the same thing in 99 and researchers took a line amps found the same thing in 2001. The office of the surgeon general found the same thing in 2007. 48:20 The perspectives of psychological science found the same thing in 2009 the Texas A &M and then the US Department of Education did a study found the same thing and then the US Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration found the same thing and DARE every time paid to silence these articles and in the mid in the early 2000s DARE started a program where the the cops would tell the kids about all these people who were DARE bashers 48:47 and I said these people are bashing there and they got the kids to write a letter to the dare bashers and they would say dear dare bashers and basically manipulate the kids to be like you want us to use drugs. That's what I was supposed to write an eighth grade. I didn't write that. Did you write that? I don't remember this part. That is what I was supposed to. It wasn't like dear bashers. It was. I was writing a letter to drugs. I think it was supposed to be dear drugs. 49:18 I think I was supposed to write a Dear John letter to cocaine. 49:24 dear drugs. I know how bad you want me, but you can't have me. I belong to God. This is two thousand eight yeah. 49:40 if I get sucked into drugs that will take too much attention away from my school, my sports and my pursuit of Osama, leave me alone sign. I didn't write it. I remember actually got in trouble. I they had a great they had a dear graduation ceremony that I wasn't. I wasn't allowed to be part of because they didn't. They literally sent me on a little raft and they were like go do drugs. They were like their own. can't 50:07 You didn't graduate there and then you were on the dare non graduate list for the rest of your life and then the cops they watched you more in public because you didn't graduate. That might be true. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was true because what became very clear so they would have the right letters to dare bashers sing like circuiting the part of the brain that is like the us versus them. 50:32 like the triggering that tribal mentality in your brain as young child yeah. That's crazy actually um and so they it's in the way that they campaign against it is crazy. I want to redo to I was actually in an official dare bashers group. Yeah, you know what I think we're dare bashers were there bashing and if you're a punk little fifth grader watching this 51:00 write me a letter, write me a letter, call me a dare and then and I'll I'll take you on further. Come say to my face, you'll twerp. How about that? Okay, so that's truly wild. That's crazy. So I want to I wanted to read these posts to you. There's a couple people within dare that responded all this negative criticism because it was constant. So in two thousand one one of it's crazy. I know this is nineteen ninety nine 51:29 and this was the spokesman for dare New York, a guy by the name of Ronald Brogan. He responded to the criticism and he said if you take German for 17 weeks, you're not going to speak German German dare officials know that the solution to the problem is not less dare, but more of it. And he said that he urges dare to beat longer and have more access to the they should do there every day. Yeah, and then we should also put bars on the doors of the classroom. 51:58 and and maybe we should be standing over them at lunch. Maybe we should just arrest them when they're born. Get ahead of it. That's kind of what I was building and maybe and maybe we should arrest the kids that we think are going to do it. How about that and then in ninety eight so a year before that another dare spokesperson said I don't. This is crazy. He said I don't have any statistics for you, but our strongest numbers are the numbers that don't show up 52:35 all right. Seems like you're coming at me with multiple studies done over several years from reputable institutions. Here's what I got to say. No 52:45 Oh, you've got studies over two decades now. No, what do think about that? What do think about that? That's what it's like. Argument people now, dude, it really I go like well, here's some facts and they just go no and you go. Oh, I didn't know that. I wish I knew that was an option this whole time, so that's crazy. It became pretty evident. 53:11 Sure, I don't have any stats. The strongest stats I've got. I mean, you can't measure in numbers. mean, every time I walk into a classroom and 28 kids run up to me smiling and then give me a big hug, that's what I know. The day your program is effective. Yeah, it became pretty obvious that they knew from the start that this didn't work to educate kids not to do drugs. Yes, and it was pretty clear that if they knew that either they 53:38 rejected all the evidence and continue to reject all the evidence or that wasn't their motivation. Right. And I think it's a little both. I think they rejected the evidence. I think they wanted to believe that what they were doing was having making a difference. And I think there was a lot of them that were just kind of like dumb and they thought, oh, it's because they're doing it wrong. And if the police do it, we do it more sure. And 54:04 actually like our number like we think like we do it and we have like circumstantial evidence that shows that it's working like I think they genuinely believed it was working even though all the studies proved them wrong. think it was I think it's the same kind of brain that just fights against academia and lives with like this like uh circumstantial evidence of like this one situation I saw at work and so it's got to work across the board um and I think that's what a lot it but I think more than that. 54:34 I think for Darryl Gates, especially this program was started and grown because of the shutdown of PDI because he said, I lost my internal spy program and I want to have a connection to the school. need cops in schools. Yeah. And so he built this program. And in fact, there's an offer by the name of Max Felker Cantor who wrote a book called dare to say no. And that's what he goes on and through the whole book where he outlines how this was Darryl's program to have 21 jump street. 55:03 perpetually because the federal government said no, you can't uh and okay, they the evidence of it shows that this was a way that they built cases against that. I'm saying was it so like was it effective in keeping kids off drugs? No. Was it effective on getting kids to rat out their parents and close more cases? Yep. Was it effective in getting more arrests of people doing minor drug dealing in the schools? Yep. Was it effective in getting police officers? 55:32 And that's like shining a specific kind of light on it for sure. We made fun of the police officer that was in our school, right? But at the same time, I do think it is helpful and good that we had a police officer and a connection to our police department at our school that we knew. What is very strange, and I think it's true of lot of organizations like this, when you look at the people at the bottom that are doing all of the work and all the effort, a lot of those people... 56:00 have the right motivations and they're doing things for the right reasons. I think most dare officers in schools were not in schools looking because they were like I want to arrest all these kids. They were trying to make a difference and trying to keep these kids off drugs. I don't think most of them understood that what they were doing was having the inverse effect of what they thought they were doing. I think they were being educated that what they were doing was actually making a right difference, but I also think there's a feeling of like okay. Well, at least we're doing something yeah, and I do think that especially 56:29 And even for, I feel like I got to be careful about how I say this. I think the mindset of these officers going in there is that, some of these kids are going to learn and we're going to help keep them away from drugs. The kids who are not going to learn, we're going to get them sooner. And I think that, I think that's a bad attitude to have, but I think that that is an attitude that they had. they, think those be these, this group of people thought it was a good thing. And so. 56:59 A very strange situation. uh It ended up not until the late 2000s admitting that, we learned that this program doesn't work. Yeah. And they put it on their website and they're like, yeah, we've learned that the way we were doing this doesn't work. And now they have a different peer to peer type program that they run. It's significantly smaller, ah but it still does run these programs in certain schools throughout the country. uh 57:28 Sick merch very popular right now pretty trendy actually it's gone through some iterations in the 90s is also very trendy and I think the reason why in both eras it was very trendy because in the 90s it was trendy because it was ironic people were like it's funny to wear their merch and then now it's again kind of funny to wear their merch. I think a lot of kids also think it's a brand but I feel weird about it. I feel like 57:58 It wasn't this huge like sketchy mastermind organization, but I feel like a lot of the motivations underneath it were wrong and bad. Sure, but I think that can happen to any nonprofit organization that starts or then even becomes a profit organization is that once the amount of money is involved and once it's at that scale, it's one of those things where it has to work. I mean, I think it was, I think it was before, I think it was sketchy before though. I think the foundation of this was not what it was broadcasted and I think that's sketchy. Yeah. 58:27 and and the list of people. There was some interesting people who were board members of this. uh You had a what was her name? Hold on. Let me see uh Diane Disney Miller, Walt's daughter. uh You had obviously all the different cops, Michael Jackson, Arsenio Hall. There's some interesting people that ended up being uh board members in this organization, a lot of millionaires, but a lot of billionaires. That's part of something of like 58:57 Okay, there's a big problem. We've got a lot of people who are like, and also like, you know, it was a little overblown in the media at the time of like how many people were on drugs, you know? And all, so many social problems are getting blamed on drugs at the point where that wasn't the reason, right? ah Why face poverty when you can just blame drugs for people being in poverty? ah That kind of thing. And this is, again, it's... 59:25 doing, it may not be doing the right thing, but it's doing something yeah, and that makes people feel good. So maybe that's maybe that's part of it. I don't know so yeah, it seems like you want to get the last word, so go ahead and finish it up. Yeah, go ahead. No, you can you get the no you've just done. You've done well. Here's the thing I want you to relisten because you've done the landing four times now. I want to hear it again. You go. Yeah, it seems like the people involved kind of sketchy and I go. Yeah, it could be this and you go. Yep, it seems like the founding of it was it was weird from the beginning. I go. Okay, yeah, 59:55 and you go, I don't know. It seems like it's like all right, buddy. So in seventh grade, me and my friend, we started a restaurant called the to Mike experience. What the to Mike experience? This is a call back and this is a call back. Is this the first time in this podcast that I did a call back that you didn't remember? What experience? Oh my God, do you remember this? You're messing with me right now. This is a bit you're bidding me on the bit that I bit 01:00:22 to myking to Mikey experience to I made the happy meal and I ate it until I was in college. You know this bit right now so bad. I forget this fiddle off. I'm done with it. 01:00:39 See you next week. 01:00:46 Hey, I remember a couple years ago when the movie cocaine bear came out and there was like a whole based on a true story thing. Well, we did a video about that so you can go watch that episode and you can watch next week's episode right now on Patreon. So thanks for being here for things. I learned last night. We do a new episode every Tuesday. Please share this. Please share this. Please share this and to all the till and bashers out there. Let me tell you something. You think you're going to get us away from this show, but there's nothing you can do. 01:01:13 to claw my grimy wet hands off of this pie. Leave a comment to the till and bashers below dear till and bashers.


The 1980s and 1990s were filled with slogans warning kids to “just say no.” At the center of this effort was the Dare program, a nationwide campaign that claimed to stop young people from falling into drug abuse. But as history shows, the story of Dare is more complicated than its bold promises. What Was the Dare Program? Dare, short … Read More

This Is the Worst Band Ever | The Shaggs Ep 292

09-23-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of the shags, the shags, the shags? Is this like what they called like the carpet, the shag carpet? I mean they did call the carpet that but it's not that take off. It was sweet. Okay, I remember in high school. uh What are my friends? Steven was his name. uh He for his sixteenth birthday, his parents got him one of those cube cars. 00:27 but it was like when they were brand new. Remember when the oh yeah, oh my gosh, these cars are square like the what are they the sions is that we're talking about yeah. It was actually cube was the name like it wasn't the new like what are they called that look like they're squares and then they get broken into a lot. The key is not the key is not the key of soul. I'm talking about the is it is the scion is that the brand it might be. It was called cube for sure. I know for a cube the Nissan cube. Oh yeah, Nissan 00:53 Yeah and they had like the I'm thinking of some that wrapped around the corner on the right. That's right. That's freaking sweet, because I almost bought is the side is sign a brand. Is that what I'm thinking of sign is a brand yeah yeah. I almost bought one of those in high school yeah. They're very spacious inside sign also had a cube car yeah yeah. It looks very similar yeah, but this one's older okay for sure. Anyways, the so they put shag carpet inside they had on the dash a little circle of shag carpet and the purpose for it was your for your phone. You just set your phone on there and because it's shag carpet it want to slide around 01:23 Oh, which was really clever and it looked honestly very cool. Just that little circle of shag carpet on there and I remember so clearly. I remember he came over to my house. I will never forget these are stories where me and Alex make eye contact and we're like what is wrong? I'll never forget this because a little circle of shag carpet. I I was saying I received my life. I remember this moment so clearly because he's born and he was born. He's going there. Do you see his eyes flutter? He's a born like April. I think it was like 01:50 Oh no, was March, was the end of the March. He was born at the end of March and his parents got uh in the car and he came over to my house. But it was a couple of days before that he was going to actually be able to go get his license. he's like, my parents got me a car for my birthday. And so we went over there like, oh my gosh, this is amazing. But he couldn't drive it. So I remember we sat in the car in the driveway for days waiting for him to get his license. And we just listened to music and we just hung out in the car because we couldn't drive it. And I remember 02:18 I remember they went to his grandma's house so his grandma could see the car and everything. uh And then he came back, because that was a few days later, like they went to grandma's house a few days later. uh He came back and he came over to my house and he was like, he was like, you're never going to believe what happened. ah And he was like, he's like, we went to grandma's house and obviously I don't have my license yet. So my dad drove and then we're on our way. And my dad takes a turn that wasn't towards grandma's house. And I was like, 02:46 that's isn't how you get a grandma's house and he's like, he's like, yeah, I just got to run an errand real quick. We're going to the shag carpet store and then we pulled into enterprise and we dropped off the rental because the car was a rental car and that day was April 1st and it was April fools joke all along. They rented a car on his birthday, said it was his birthday, 16th birthday gift and then on April fools, they returned it. 03:12 Isn't that brutal? 03:17 so and they ended up getting a car but it was nowhere near as cool. It was like a normal high schoolers. They ended up giving her a car. They did get him a car but it was like a normal high schooler car like like an old like Honda. 03:29 It was so brutal. We I'm not even exaggerating. Wow! I we easily clocked like probably thirty hours sitting in that in the driveway for like that week until April Fools came around just sitting in that car. That's terrible. It's brutal. What's he doing now? uh He lives in Temecula actually. Oh yeah. So I don't know what he's doing out there. She's man talking to his parents, probably not 04:00 all right. Well, what a great way to start the episode that's so sad. That's not let's talk about someone else. That's one of those ideas that you would have as a parent and be like wouldn't that be really funny if we did that and then you kind of laughed about it and you're like yeah, we way too cruel. We can't do that to this child that we love. You know that we've nurtured and cared for for sixteen years. Now we couldn't possibly see them be devastated when we return that car. Yeah, we can't do that because that would be cruel and then 04:28 some parents go. That's funny. 04:34 and like I don't need a relationship with them in couple of years. Oh, I would ah and then those parents have the audacity to get on the internet and be like oh my kid went no contact for no reason. Like I think it was a bunch of the car sick that might be one of them. I think it's the underlie okay, okay, but for real though the underlying part of your brain that's like that's really funny to do to my kid. 04:59 that level of cruelty is why they would go now contact for sure and you'd be like oh just because we played an April Fool's joke. My kid doesn't talk to me anymore. Anyway, that's yeah right, it's crazy, so that's not what this episode is about though. I mean, but it is a similar level of parenting. Oh oh 05:32 They're not throwing stuff 05:40 Things I learned last night. 05:49 tags yeah kind of uh so we got to start the story by talking about a guy by the name of Austin Wiggin here. He is and his wife, him and his wife happy family. Okay, you say that yeah. There are like a this, but a sixties photo yeah yeah. Here's somebody holding this picture 06:16 I have a who that is. I need to describe this because he shows a picture of a couple in the sixty's probably and then here is and I'm not trying to be mean. I'm saying like this is Jeffrey Dommer in a very dark room lit up holding this printed out version of this picture. That's terrifying. It's not like and like the guy's not smiling along with it. He's like looking over the top of it just like 06:45 Look at these people like look at these victims of mine. 06:51 crazy. I don't know why this picture exists. I'm not gonna lie. That's not relevant. That guy's not relevant at the story at all. No, no, no. I don't know who he is or why he did this. All right, but okay, sure. You just found this and thought it'd be funny to include. Yeah, because it is. It is funny to include. Okay, so Austin, the the husband in this photo, his mom had a hobby growing up and her hobby was palm reading. 07:20 And so she read his poems one day and she told him, okay, yes, I can tell from your palms that you are going to marry a woman with blonde hair. You're going to have two sons after I die and you're going to have daughters and your daughters are going to be famous musicians. And Austin said, okay, mom, I'm going to go play. Uh, and then kind of like forgot about it. But then he married his wife who has blonde hair. Yeah. Hard to see in this photo. 07:49 And then his mom died shortly after he had two sons. Okay. And then years later he had three daughters and so okay, became convinced that his daughters were going to be famous musicians. And so one day, what about his sons? What are they doing? Just dumb. I don't know. Now that I think about it, this might be his son. 08:12 My parents, my parents favored my sisters. Okay, ah so he pulls his daughters out of school and he buys them instruments. He is not a musician. He does not know how to play. Okay, he does not even think to get them lessons. He just gives them instruments and says here you're going to be famous musicians and he is like this is what you should spend your time doing is learning how to play and they're like we don't know how and he's like 08:41 learn. He's like yeah, I don't. I know you don't know how, but that's why I'm telling you this is what you should do is figure it out. So start to learn like it. Just do it. Okay, it's not hard. It's not her hard to learn stuff and so these girls uh there's actually a fourth one that you don't hear about a lot and she's never in any of the photos, which is very strange to me, but there's Dorothy who he has six kids. Yes, four daughters, two sons, two sons. Yes. Okay, um there's Dorothy. She goes by dot 09:11 kind of cool dot Wigan Helen Betty and I know my wife can't listen to this. You don't want her to hear the name dot any time you give a cute little nickname like that. Now she wants to name our kid Dorothy. I know it. I know the second she heard that she's like that's really cute dotty dot dot dot Myers yeah honestly pretty sick because you've got jerry Myers dot com. You could have dot dot com dot dot dot dot 09:41 Can you have a dot dot domain name dot dot. 09:47 You can have anything at the end. I don't know if you got anything at the end. Hold on works. don't think that's how that works. Yes, uh dot dot dot dot dot is a sick domain name. It says is unavailable domains. Yeah, it doesn't okay come up anyway, and it's not even like it's like a hey. We can get it for you. It's just not available. I don't think you can have a dot dot, but that's sick. If you could yeah, I'm going to campaign for that. I don't know where I campaign for that, but I want a dot dot dot 10:16 Okay anyways, so they get together. They start learning and practice for the four of them and over time they get to the point where they can do something that resembles me. Were they born? What time era is this? Could we joke that they like that photo looks like the sixties, but I feel like you should know the time frame of the years that their band was active. They started in nineteen sixty five okay, and they named their band the shacks and so they got to the point where they started being able to do something that resembled music. 10:57 that's such an incredibly hurtful thing to say about somebody's art. Okay, they're doing something that resembles music, I guess. 11:16 okay, they live in this small town in New Hampshire called Fremont um and they his dad or their dad started going around and being like you got to put my daughters on your shows uh and so they would get put on events and it started out like talent shows and like yeah, it would play at like roller rinks and things like that same stuff. I did at beginning of my career. Yeah, you just real wherever people would take you anybody that someone let you do it. I'll do it. So this is a photo from one of the early shows again. 11:44 Where's the for the fourth one is just never pictured, but she's always listed. Also the head stocks on these guitars are so sick like so sick. Yeah, I don't know and what's the age differences between these girls? I don't know. They're pretty close. I was gonna say they're very similar. Yeah, they look like the same person. Honestly, yes, I was wondering if any of them were twins because they look like clones. Okay, it was like he's like only I have any daughters, so he cloned his sons and 12:14 made them daughters. so yeah, so they started doing these events and here's the thing I said that they they started being able to do something that resembled music. They weren't good and so they would do these events and this is the sixties and people. Here's the thing about the sixties is audiences. If you were bad, they let you know and so they would go do they still do just so you know, just so you know as a performer, you know, well, they would go to these shows and people would just throw trash at them. 12:44 they like from their concessions. They're just throw it on stage and so they were driving around New Hampshire and their dad putting them on these events yeah and word started to spread about them and people would show up. Some people would show up because they were like oh, it's a dance. I can go and I could dance at this event because a dance is used to always have live bands. They have we have record player or whatever DJs. That's the word I'm looking for sure they always had live bands. They were the live band. People would show up to dance the back. All these guys suck, but then there was a large amount of people, mostly like high school kids. 13:14 who found out oh this band that's really bad. It's going to be there. We should go and boo them. Oh, we should go to be mean to them because it'll be fun yeah and so they kind of got this reputation. Bullying was cool in the six. They got this reputation of like being a bad band that people would go see to be mean to because they were so bad and at a certain point. Okay, and the girls are like dad. We don't want to keep doing it. Shut up 13:41 and so they get back out there. They started getting booked more and more because they drew such a big, I drew a big crowd, even though the crowd was not like hostile. Yeah, they were a bad crowd, but people were still showing up, so they were getting their buying tickets. Yeah, they're getting. Yeah exactly. Now that's a strategy. 14:02 So their dad is like, hey, they're catching fire, right? And so they had a weekly standing event in Fremont at like one of the concert halls and they had events all around the state. They're like getting, I don't want to say big because they weren't good. Nobody was there because they liked them, but they were getting big for being bad. But I don't think their dad recognized this for being bad. 14:29 And so their dad is like, it's like a lot of the things that we share on tick tock with each other. Yeah, there's so many accounts that exist on tick tock. That's clearly like this person is famous because of how bad they are at this talent. They're trying to show off. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And, it's in people and like most people on internet, tock is different on tick tock because it's like nobody has to see you making fun of them. 14:55 that this is true. Making fun of the I don't know man. If you look to the comment section because it's pretty visible. 15:03 I guess that's fair, yeah, I guess that is fair. 15:08 Hey, join us on Patreon if you want this to be ad free and also there's a bunch of other perks. You get to all episodes are ad free. You get next week's episode right now and you get to do monthly hangouts with me and Tim. Like it's like a virtual just hangout room and we play games together. We talk, we have show and tell sometimes. We've made a lot of good friends through this and so it's a really good time to do that. So either way, please share the episode, tell somebody about it. These are all those ways to help us grow the show because we love doing it and we want to keep doing it. So thanks for being here. 15:42 So their dad is like, they're catching fire. This is the moment. This is their moment. This is where they're going to make it. like, they range from like late middle school to mid high school at this point in age, but they're not going to school. And so he's like, he's like, I'm going to drive them down to revere Massachusetts, probably named after Paul. 16:08 they drive down to Paul Revere and they go to a recording studio and review Massachusetts and he pays for them to record an album, a full length album. What did he do for a job? We know he was a mill hand at Exeter, so this is not like he's not like a rich in person. I mean no, no yeah, so he saved up deal yeah. That's what I'm saying. This was a major investment. Yeah, this isn't like he's like a rich guy was just pushing his kids into success. Yeah, this is like he believes his mom's palm reading yeah. 16:37 Way too much. How do you explain that to your wife and children? Hey, your grandma told my told me because she read my hand. Your grandma felt my hand a little bit and said that you were going to be famous. Read the lines. Read. Can't you read? No, Dad, we didn't go to school. 16:57 You don't even know where reading is. Every night. 17:10 I see your name in lights again shags the share. People are chanting shags shags shags shags. What is the thing? Is the thing he he was working and so he never saw these shows. He just knew that they were booking a lot of shows. It's like you guys sold a thousand to the class and I like yeah like dad. He's like nonsense. He like wouldn't listen to them. 17:38 but he's like you're, you're, were they perceiving that it was bad? I think yeah, I think they totally knew and I they weren't passionate about it either. Like they did not want to do this, but their head was like so heavily pushing it toward, but they weren't like they were good at this. No, I don't think yeah, they I don't think they thought that so they put together this record and they recorded a full length album. Do we have any audio with the sounds like yeah? Do want to hear some? I would love to hear what the band sounds like ah so 18:02 Here's here's a can we play this is this owned by we can play a couple seconds. Okay, here's a track. It's a single that they put out before they put out the record called my pal foot foot. Here's the Al my pal foot foot. Yeah, it's named after will dot had a cat that she called foot foot because it only had the two back feet and so is foot foot. So for the audio listener, it's a hand drawn. It looks like a tiger, but attached to a fish face. 18:32 Which honestly, here's the crazy thing. This looks like any Midwest Emo's DIY album art. Oh yeah, it's cool. Like it's it's it very much would fly today. Let's hear it. But yeah, here's the track. Hopefully this plays. 18:54 You know, we fast forward to like an actual main part. We can skip to this. uh 19:13 it sounds like the music you hear in a nightmare. It's like you were spot on with something that sounds like music. It's my pals name is here's the problem do the way my brain works. 19:33 and the dad can't hear them practicing well. The dad's not a musician either, so like he just hears it resembles music and he's like and they're so good. Ting ting so my pals name is foot foot. 19:53 So the audio engineer records this whole album and we do. This is this is the producers yeah where you can make something so bad. You didn't know that reference the producers. I know what the producers is yeah. What is it? It's a musical go ahead where you can make something so that it was successful. You only know it and I only and I know you only know it from curb your enthusiasm. Is that why you know it? I actually my mom liked that. I think I yeah think so 20:23 It's got me thinking there's a way to do this podcast, the shags and first of all, no, because I'm legitimately good at this row, your trash in our comments. Just leave a comment that just is trash. Put your comments in the comment. Leave your thoughts, ding dead prayers to 20:53 Cut the cut. It's fun because her rhythm, the drummer's rhythm specifically, just keeps changing. Every measure is a new rhythm. Okay. I love it so much. So they record this. engineer sits down, records a track, turns to their dad and says, Austin, they are not ready yet. And he says, they are selling out night after night. We have to get this record out now. This is their chance. And so the audio engineer... 21:23 basically gets held at gunpoint doesn't actually get held at gunpoint, but the dad like heavily pressures them and it's like just I'm paying you put this record together and he's like this is bad and so and he's like okay, if you really want to do this, but they're selling out shows like this yeah. I mean they're selling out shows, but like these aren't they're like hundred cap rooms. They're not like, but still they're selling out. They yeah they are. They are people are there to make fun of them or they don't know what they're getting into. It's probably more on the promoter than any and anything. 21:52 but it's working okay. They put together this album called the philosophy of the world again. The four sister is in here and I don't know why okay and and she's in the drum. She plays from the inside like she's not even holding the sticks like she even wants to pretend to know how to play the drums. You know and like 22:22 Are they both playing guitar? No base yeah yeah well, honestly, that might be the third the fourth sister that's just missing. She might be the bassist philosophy of the world sick cover art and so honestly here's the thing. Here's another like promotional photo that they got to which girls. These girls are still looks like a Midwest. These girls are still alive. That's all I can say right now. These girls are still alive. 22:49 they're still like I can't wait to find out what they're doing now. uh This this looks like a Midwest Emo band. Yeah, they're all standing there with their hands straight down to their side like a bunch of homeschoolers like genuinely any any kid, any hipster that liked folk in twenty fifteen. This would have been their favorite band. Wow, send this to Aaron Malone and so like they have shout out to our friend Aaron Mola and her bands are good. I don't know how many bands she's in uh and so 23:18 there's a little, you know, whatever and you're telling me that that's straight up. The one on the left is like an Aaron Malone outfit. It really I think I've seen Aaron wear that outfit before. Yeah, yeah, it's true. It's so sick. It is. Yeah, it looks great. The whole thing is are very sixties outfits. It's very fat. This is fashionable now. Yeah, I actually it's ironic. You said that I saw a tweet 23:43 I always call just anything on threads or a blue sky or anything tweets. I don't use Twitter, but I thought tweet the other day. Someone said Hank Green did a great video on that. How is it we how the word tweet is means something in our culture? Yeah, you can't just buy Twitter and be like change it. Yeah, yeah, I agree. Yeah, so I saw tweet and this communication form is a tweet. Yes, yeah, not this. This is a podcast. 24:11 But I'm saying like he was, that's he saying is like this form of communication, short text form. This is a tweet that's not that's in our lexicon that way the same way it's a google. It is just search online. Yeah, why don't you google it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but this guy tweeted he said he said turns out life is just watching it go from skinny jeans to baggy jeans to skinny jeans to baggy jeans. Yeah, that's so accurate and here's the more because you keep gaining weight and losing weight and then gaining weight. No, I think it's he's talking about the style 24:41 Oh, it's like watching it because that was back then it makes sense. I thought it was like yeah. Life is just me gaining ten pounds, losing ten pounds, gaining ten pounds, losing ten pounds and that's what thirties are. You know, you gain some weight, you lose some weight, so their dad continued toting them around. Yeah, they went and they how long are they doing this printed all these records? Well, don't give you the end time yet, but how long into this is like what year the album come out. 25:10 This album is sixty nine, so they're four years and they've been they've been bad. Yeah, and no point for a while in public. They've been bad in public. They've been bad in public. 25:24 And so they put this record together and they actually they go to a like record printer a dryers record company and they put together a thousand copies of the album with liner notes and everything like it was a full record that they put together. Yeah, they got that put together and they uh for some reason were only a hundred copies of this record got delivered. The rest of the nine hundred were just gone. 25:52 Okay, so I don't know what happened with that, but their dad took him around the local record stores to get him to sell in record stores and started. They started bringing them to the events to start selling these okay, and they continued doing shows and their shows continued doing badly. I should say doing badly. Their show still did well. I was just say the show was bad, but they were selling tickets. They were selling more and more. No, they just continued selling like these hundred cap rooms okay until eventually uh Austin 26:22 had a massive heart attack and died ah and this was seventy five and the girls said ten years in yeah and the girls were like we don't want to do this anymore ah and so they just stopped and that was the end of the shags until yeah in until ah somewhere. What was this in the eighties in the mid eighties someone was digging around that record printing company and managed to find nine hundred copies of philosophy of the world. m 26:51 and he listening to it and he was like holy cow. This is rough. He's like everybody has to see this and so he started just giving out copies of this to everybody and he was like you got to check out this record. This is so right. One of the his contacts was a Boston radio station host at WPC and WBCN, which was a big yeah radio. Nothing radio guys love more than being like 27:14 hey guys, it's your Tuesday drive. Check out this terrible song we found from the shags. I know it's morning. I know you're stuck in traffic, but you know what would make that worse? Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba and then you're stuck in traffic. You're like oh my gosh dude. So they started playing on the radio and it started getting to the point where in the eighties they started playing on the radio yeah and this started getting 27:40 passed around to radio stations in the Northeast, because they were like, oh, we to our hands on that. Yeah, we got to our hands on that and start playing that. This is a meme band. Yeah. And so it became this thing where everyone's like, look how this is the worst band in the world. Meanwhile, these girls are listening to the radio and they're like, hey, that's my song. And so my cat's name is Footfoot. He is a deformed cat and he's pretty sad that he has only two foot. 28:11 So in the 80s, the Rolling Stone writes an article about them because they find out about it. And so they put this together, the worst album ever recorded. And they publicized this big article about how bad this record was. And then it became like this cult classic. Everyone wanted to get their hands on one of these copies because there's 900 in the world. Yeah. It was like, need and I need to own a philosophy of the war. And they're not making any money from this, though. No. Yeah. Because the record company owns it. 28:37 Got it. OK. And so the record company is putting out there are there's the 900 that are just like floating out in the world and they're getting royalties from all the radio stations that are playing it. And this is like such a big deal throughout the 80s that by the 90s Kurt Cobain on an interview says that one of his top influences is the Shaxx and whether he was trying to be funny or not. 29:05 I don't know, but it was enough to wear enough of his fans were like we need to find the shags and so this like just started becoming this thing that was just rolling over from the eighties into the nineties of everybody being like oh, we love the shacks somehow. This got back to the shacks and they were like oh, should we do a reunion and so in ninety nine dot was a what I mean what's the what's the harm? What's the risk? It's not like you're like oh, are we still you think we still got it? 29:35 What if we go out there and we're not as good anymore? So dot dot and I just don't remember how to play that song. I never knew. I guess what's crazy guys I got to I got to admit thirty years later. I never knew how to play that. Yeah, I was thinking too. I didn't know either. You were faking the whole time. I didn't know either. I would have said that for dad guys 30:04 Can I be in it this time? You were in it the whole time. No, I wasn't. I was just around. I was just around. He would be on you guys would play. I would go around the corner and get an ice cream cone, but then she'd be on stage halfway through just on the edge of stage, basically side stage, but not quite enough to be off stage still technically on stage just like VIP lanyard on the edge of the spotlight. 30:33 half in half out of the spot. You can hear her in the album yeah, the audio engineer was kind of like he's sitting right next to her and the audio engineer just went 30:52 you guys got to hear out loud. No, you guys don't get it. That's the best part of the record. It's not going to hurt the leaflet says dot lead guitar and vocals, Helen, a rhythm guitar, Betty drums, racial ice cream, 31:16 If you the show, a great way to serve support is by getting some merch. We got lots of great stuff. I'm going to showcase some of it right now. This is like our little tilling QVC. You can get a it's not a call. It's a podcast sweatshirt. Very sweet. The nice thing about this is no one knows what podcast you're talking about. So you were in public and you can tell them about your lord and savior to a podcast. We also got the this is one of my favorite things we've ever made. The fiddle off fest hoodie. It's got uh the devil. 31:45 playing a fiddle. It's not really the devil's a skeleton. And then all of the bands on the back of it like it's a festival. But spoiler alert, these aren't bands. These are jokes from episodes. So worth checking out. And this is one of my favorite things we've ever done. This is for the real fans is an old one. We've got a Tim Stones get well quick trick shirt. And it's very cool. We've got some really good designs. Darren is good at designing stuff. So support his dream. No one will hire him as a designer, but you can by buying his merch. 32:14 It's our merch, but it's his designs. so leave a comment, say, Jared, you're good at this. um We like your art. He really needs it. He needs your support so bad. Please make him feel better about it and buy some merch. It helps make this show keep happening. You can tell people about how much you love this show with it. So. 32:37 Did you hear? Did you hear what I said? Yeah, you're to do a two minute merch ad. wasn't a two minute merch ad. Oh, Jaren's a good designer. Give him a high five. Make him feel good about his art. 32:51 and then you're going to make them listen to two minutes of ads. We got to do all that and then it's going to be like back to school this fall like 33:02 I don't want to be. Well, hey, there's skippable ads. They're not skip. They are skippable. Yeah, you too premium leave all this in that hand. 33:15 does the leaflet actually list Rachel though it does yeah and as what I don't know what it lists her as it lists all in it. I don't know if it lists like but it lists four people and there's three on the cover in the pad yeah. Rachel is never seen okay, so in the nineties and I do and Rachel's like can I be in I be no like yeah Rachel so in ninety nine no they go. She goes she goes hey guys and like 33:43 wait. Oh, we have a fourth sister. Sorry Rachel. I didn't realize you were there scared me. What do you want? Can I be? What do you want? Rachel? I guess so guys ban meeting huddle up. Let me in. Let me in her forty at this point. Let me in. I please be in the how old in the sixty. I mean the band with sixty in sixty five. They were middle school to high school 34:12 Okay, so they're in their fifties and nineties right yeah, I think so yeah, uh so ninety nine, maybe, maybe later forties early fifties ninety nine rolls around and there was this like new found like excitement over it and so dot at the time she was working as a cleaner betty was a school janitor janitor. Rachel was aware, Rachel Rachel was a warehouse employee and let me just read 34:42 the Wikipedia line for Helen. Helen was living on disability benefits with severe depression. Wonder why um probably probably her dad um taking them out of school and for sure play music that she didn't like. So they got back to that. They're like, let's get the band back together. People like us now. And so they start playing these like festivals that were put together from like sure they're like independent DIY type festivals, the kind of stuff that 35:12 Nirvana Nirvana fans would go to Nirvana. You know the type of thing that Nirvana fans would like and so they were go and they would play like side stages at these festivals right, but they had like a cult falling. So now for the first time ever people would go see them and people seem like they liked them and they're like what is happening? I'm like we're not getting booed like they can't were no one's like the riot police. ah 35:41 And they're like, guys, they're not throwing stuff at us. 35:48 Guys. 35:58 That's Rachel on the side of the stage. 36:05 What if she doesn't talk? does. I think I or make her super. She did not talk to heads, Paul, Rachel, where's your shoes? The show, give her shoes, shoes, playing these festivals, festivals. 36:32 And it was like a couple uh of festivals they played in 99. Yeah, the shags on war towards this summer. And so then this record label in 2001 put together uh Animal World is what they're called. They released a Better Than The Beatles tribute album with covers of the shags that big name artists covered covers, covered shags songs. 36:57 you know how much talent it would take to learn that drum part for real. That's what I was like how how much talent it would take to go well, someone in this era sat down and like I know it's it's tough. It's tough to not to be that bad for me. It looks pretty easy for you. Someone sat down. Oh, they did it out. Wow crazy 37:26 it's a little tough to tough to follow, um so you could if you wanted to yeah and honestly would be a pretty good bit for you to learn this ah my pal foot foot cover. ah So that record came out and prompted them to get together for another reunion in the early two thousands um and riser records came back together and they re released this record and so they actually printed it for mass release a new release of this record. 37:56 okay, and they put together this cool new album art for it still right. So guys, it's so this is a drawing of the three sisters. I think those two are twins. They've got to be right. Yeah, they look very similar and so Rachel's not in it. I mean is it could be. I mean they they all look very, very similar. Yeah, they're siblings. That's how that works. 38:24 I think Rachel's in this one, but she's cropped out. We did cut Rachel out of this photo, um so they they got to the point where all these artists were starting to list them as um influences and stuff yeah yeah and then in to their there now all the bands, greatest bands of the nineties are like making this joke that the shags is their greatest influence yeah and that's that here's the interesting thing about it. I will say this is weird and I don't know what to take of it. 38:54 we watch the interviews. They say it and it's one of those things was like they could be joking, but they're like not acting like they're joking. So it's like it could be one of those things where it's like you're joking and you don't want to whatever you know, but it could be one those things where they could be serious because all of them, their bands like Nirvana, where their sound was so different from everything else that like that could have. Do you think they're like they're just like their home? I love that these girls clearly didn't kid. I love those girls just put that stuff out there. They didn't care if people liked it and the other girls like actually 39:24 we actually really wanted people to love this. I thought people would like it. Everyone's a put your ice cream cone down and talk for second. She's been eating that ice cream cup for twenty three years. The same one code. It's so moldy Tim. 39:50 Jared and I have this thing gets to a different place. I have this thing where I always take away further than turn like you know, is I even further. It's just you take a hard left and I'm like yes and I have to yes and you take not only a left but like a full will you turn around the block and you go, it's moldy. Yeah, think she's chopping on mold and she just won't finish. I did this thing last night. 40:21 I was we were on our fancy football draft and I had a slice of pizza and I just kept taking the first bite, but I would like I would just like light it up so it my all I did was just eating the same. So it looks like you're eating a new slice of pizza every time yeah, but it's just one. It's just the first bite of it and I did it for two and a half hours just and it really it took probably two hours before Zach noticed and he was like. Are you eating the same slice of pizza? There's a whole time 40:49 and you're like I got yeah, I'm actually starving because I haven't taken a bite of this in two hours. I'm favoring hungry so cold. This bit was very worth it. I'm glad that you noticed. Had you not, I would have had to text you and be like hey guys, I mean this is that you know it's a hard time right now because the work was tough yesterday, man, so 41:14 that's why did you do that? That's what I'm saying. That's a Winston bit where it's like. Oh, I can't. Did they laugh? No, they didn't get it. It's like they didn't get it. They would laugh if they got it. This is super funny dude. 41:37 it's cold man. You've wasted your pizza. It's funny. Cold beats is still pretty good thing. I want pizza so bad right now. So in two thousand four K a producer came forward and was like hey, I want to tell your story yeah, and so he made their story into a musical and it actually landed on broadway for a short run on broadway, but the best part about it 42:03 is Rachel is uh still not in it. Oh, poor girl. Yeah. And so this is them playing at a birthday party in the show. Yeah, they got the hats and everything. Yeah. And so it tells their story and they have mixed feelings about it because it kind of made their story a little hokey uh as opposed to reality. It turned their lives into a loopy joke is the quote uh and then in 2006, dies. 42:32 and then do you have any pictures of them in the nineties playing though? Do you have any pictures of what they looked like as adults playing? I don't have any pictures in the nineties, but I can tell you that in twenty fifteen they got invited by neutral milk hotel, which one of our patrons said, would you say neutral milk hotel neutral milk hotel milk? Yeah, neutral neutral like park new verse. Yes, 43:02 Yes. Yes. Okay. So milk hotel, which one of our patrons says is their favorite band. Oh, it's a band. Yeah, that's a band neutral milk hotel took them on tour to be their opener. And so they toured in 2015 and this is them opening for that, for that band and onto Helen's Helen's dead though. 43:26 so I don't know if notice this. There's only two of them brought two other dudes to play and Rachel still not in the band, but is it and here's what I also love. They have a music stand with their lyrics on there, you know, because they're going to forget the lyrics thousand and the musicians are in the back and it's like hey, you guys are paid musicians. Could you guys learn these songs and if you're a paid musician, here's my thought 43:55 they can't tell if you did or not. Why waste your time? Learn the song, just play whatever you think they're going to know. They're literally just playing smoke on the water. Rachel is still not in this by the way. 44:10 where I don't even think Rachel's real at this point. I don't understand. She never shows up at any of the pictures, any of the pictures. I hate the way you're like Helen's dead. Okay, and how I mean like how old are they in that? Like guys that they're they're this sixties. Yeah, they're all they're older. Yeah, you know, early seventies. What's crazy is at this point in time when they were touring with neutral milk hotel uh 44:37 their original the original nine hundred copies were selling for ten thousand dollars at auction like they're like important things that people are trying to get their hands on ah and so that's truly wild yeah. So they ended up. uh This is this story is so interesting to me because it kind of feels like that guy. What's what am I thinking of who got famous in Australia? Oh six to Rodriguez yeah kind of feels like six to Rodriguez is so Rodriguez was bad like they got famous years later without realizing it and then they did and then they went on tour. 45:06 but they are famous for not being good, which is just so fascinating to me. You can fail your way into and that's maybe that's the lesson. Well, that's the thing. They weren't really successful though like they. mean they kind of where they made a living from that, though. No, I don't think so. I think the record companies made a lot of money and that's why I could only play a couple seconds because the record companies still on the rights to all these songs. Yeah, songs on YouTube and everywhere. Well, we'll play it. We'll play more of one in the after the fiddle where our patreon supporters received it. um 45:34 and so if you're, if you're a patron supporter, you can get that's that's included to you because we don't monetize those videos um yeah. That's crazy. Yeah, they've they've they're it's a band. It's so bad. Yeah, wow yeah, very odd and I'm trying to think of like if there's like a magician could do that be so bad that they were good. Yes, like you 46:04 I don't know like I'm just thinking like there's like there's a way to do that where it like that to me feels like Zach Zucker, who I send you his videos all the time where it encroaches into the territory of clowning where you're intentionally doing something so poorly and so there's no structure to this that it's like it's you know, but he's doing in a way that's like he's brilliant. Well, what's really interesting is if you go online like on YouTube like they have the actual record and so you could hear the songs from the actual record 46:33 but there actually is a lot of bands that covered their songs because I do think you're right. Like I think there's this weird challenge of like yeah learning to play it because it's so not normal. You know what's crazy though. Rachel ice cream girl is the only one to beat the devil in a fiddle. If you like that episode, you might like six to Rodriguez, another guy who got famous long after he was trying to get famous and then he went on tour after the fact. 46:57 and if you want to see next week's episode, you can do that right now over on patreon. We'll see you next week on things. I learned last night. Share this with somebody while you're at it. Yeah, tell a friend. Don't wait thirty years. Don't wait thirty years to tell someone about this podcast.


Some stories in music history are stranger than fiction. The rise of The Shaggs is one of them. What started as a father’s obsession with a palm reading became a band often labeled the worst band ever. Yet, against all odds, their legacy still echoes decades later. A Band Born from a Prophecy The Shaggs were formed in the 1960s … Read More

The Lies About Balloonfest ’86

09-16-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of balloon fest eighty six balloon fest? Oh, I think I've heard of this yeah. I think okay well uh wait. Maybe I'm thinking I is this hot air balloons or is this like the no it's it's cold air balloons cold air balloons. Okay, standard air balloons. 00:24 Okay, so high school was in the 80s. So hey, what do you guys think about us filling up balloons? And they're like, 00:31 Yeah, do whatever you want. You know, they're cool. They're way too cool for this. They got the puffy hair. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They're way too cool. They're like, they're smoking in class. so much in school. Things I learned last night. 00:54 Standard, normal, regular, everyday air balloons. Okay. uh Okay. I think the best way to start this story is by talking about the only thing that makes sense when talking about balloons and that is Disney World or Disneyland Disneyland Disneyland because in nineteen eighty five Disneyland said, what did it be sweet? They're celebrating their thirtieth. Yeah. They said, of these sweet if we launched more balloons than anybody's ever launched in the history of this world. And so they hired a guy. 01:23 by the name of let me get his name real quick. They hired a guy by the name of Treb Treb Henning. I'm pretty sure it's trim. I'm sorry. Did you say? Did you say trim rev? No Treb T reb? Okay, he what nationality is that name? Is that shoot? Is that shoot? Is that short for something? I don't know if it's short for anything. I've seen an interview of him and he looks like an average eighties 01:52 dad like white suburban dad treb is a cool name. Yeah, I don't know like because he's got like the male pattern baldness and like the big glasses with thin rim. What is Jeb short for Jebediah Treva Daya Treba Daya. So Treba Daya had a company called Balloon Art by Treb, okay, and he was based in La. Yeah, it's fun because if you if you read articles about this, it says they uh subcontracted 02:20 Los Angeles based company balloon art by trap and it's like we don't have to act like this is like a big company like the way you're phrased. Yeah, I lost this is base. This is a dude who fills balloons up in his garage. Is that really the vibe or is it like a company? Well, I don't know what the vibe is. I mean, I guess technically speaking he is doing a lot of big events with these balloons. Okay, so he did the Olympics. He did the balloons for the Olympics. Yes, he's probably a bigger. He's not probably doing that in his garage. I mean yeah, he's got a three car 02:51 In 1985, yeah, he was freaking rich. Nineteen, nineteen eighty five. I have a three car garage at my house. My dad fills up balloons all day, not with hot air. It's all cold. Just standard clear balloon. Nineteen eighty five. So this is like, hey, we need you to make more balloons go up than anybody's ever made. Go up and he was like, OK, 03:21 weird way to say that. So they hired him for this event. Okay, and it was just gone up. Okay, you you hit it exactly on the head. They was a thirty year anniversary. They wanted to make a big deal out of it, say hard. Well, I know because right now is their seventy. Yeah, this year was there. They're like how we've been around for like a long time, been around long enough to die. Hey, speaking of dying dude, here's the thing man. 03:50 I think I might be losing it because I as soon as I landed in the airport last night, I get off the plane and you know what's vacuuming the airport, one of the one of those robots. Yeah, I go to quick trip today. What's in quick trip one of those little I and that the quick trip one talks to you. It's got I say it went welcome to quick trip and I wanted it to die so bad. I wanted to knock it over because it looks like a little miniature zamboni just go and a trip. 04:20 down like that yeah. What are we doing yeah? My the quick trip by my house they put all the floors are got a little action figure that sits on top of it. I hate it yeah and here's what I was thinking is that because I was actually talking to a guy today about how like the vin hub by my house yeah. You know I called you I ranted about this yeah. I told you about the vin hub thing. Do I talk about this on the podcast you might have the vin hub. It's a giant vending machine with robots inside 04:49 and so you go twenty four seven. It's like a convenience store. They've got like energy drinks, anything that you would have like a seven eleven like you know, little snacks, uh ibuprofen, all the stuff and it's got little robot arms that you just basically just go. want that and it goes and the guy today made a really great point was he said well yeah, but like in five years that the robot technology is outdated, so they have to replace the robot. He goes so all the savings they're saving by not having the tendon 05:17 they're going to have to replace those parts. Even if it's not five years, they're replace those parts in ten fifteen, maybe maybe yeah, maybe true and I and I said this. I said you that's right. I mean like it takes people seventy years to break down and these robots break down every ten 05:34 Yeah, I guess that's true. So honestly, capitalist pigs. If you're listening, which I know you are, you're not listening, you're really your your I don't know. You have like a an AI recap. That's just like they joked around and about this and blah blah blah blah or whatever. It was really annoying. You should leave a comment about how annoying it was. That's the AI. The A is like if you're listening, it's more cost effective for you to hire people because 05:58 to one. Two things are going to happen. One, this little quick trip robot is going to run out of juice. The battery is going to replace the no. The battery costs more than the whole appliance itself. The battery will corral and two I'm going to beat the crap out of it and you're going to have to replace. You're to have to do something about that. I'm to fight that robot fist fight that robot. Okay, all right, me and velocity gnome are here to fight that robot and fight the robot bears. 06:27 You know, is this a valid crash out? I'm having or no, it is a bad crash out. I I don't think it's. I don't know. I think it's a valid crash out. Yeah, whatever, but I there's nothing we could do about it. We're just going to become. we're all just going to die. All right, only in seventy years though, which is how old Disney was or is now at this time. They were thirty at this time. Disney was young and spry and only thirty years old and still had a whole life ahead of it. 06:55 disneyland yeah sorry disney yeah yeah yeah, and so they were like we got to celebrate have the bird had a big in a big party yeah so treb put together a million balloons and I can't picture what a million balloons looks like he went to disney and he released a million balloons at disney land my gosh he filled those up in his garage yeah there's one hot air balloon in the background. Oh yeah look at that. I think it was that so this is cool yeah it's not really thinking about anything 07:25 in the neighborhood or did they get this approved by the city? I mean this was eighty five, so probably not. I mean yeah, I do five. Who cares? um I miss the days man, could you can't do something like this now? No, you could not because of this. Probably what happened? So they did this. How many fish did that kill? I don't know. um I imagine that it all goes into the ocean. Well, I mean, I don't know 07:53 I don't know. As far as I'm aware, this goes off relatively without a hitch, but there was someone in the crowd that day and he worked for United Way. was in the marketing department uh and he saw this and he said, this is really cool. And he said, I just recently got placed in a new United Way office in Cleveland, Ohio. And he said, man, Cleveland's there. They're in a bad way. uh Cleveland over the last 10 years has been just rotted with scandal. 08:23 So the list is pretty long. We're going to kind of go through everything real quick, so you can just get an idea of where Cleveland's at as a city. Okay, obviously they're a steel town and they are part of the whole motor city, like falling apart, or a tree big. Yeah, so like they blew up in population and now in this era when everything got shipped overseas in the late seventies, they no longer have in the late seventies. No, in the 08:51 early like 70s. Yeah, the whole 70s across the 70s. Yeah, these all these auto and manufacturers got shipped overseas. Yeah. And so then a lot of their manufacturer manufacturing plants shut down, steel plants shut down and a lot of people lost their jobs. Right. This was also the era of white flight. so downtown Cleveland was falling apart because of white flight. On top of that, there was a shocking amount of bomb violence throughout 09:20 the seventies really enough to where they earned the name bomb city USA because there was just so many people just like doing like like bombs yeah just makeshift bombs and so like car bombs were constantly going off and like people were setting up little like um what's the word on the pipe bombs everywhere it was just a really common thing terrorism I mean terrorism but also people who were like it was like going postal but before going postal it was like I'm gonna bomb 09:49 my office because I'm disgruntled or like I lost my job at the steel mill. So I'm going to bomb the steel mill. uh People are doing that in this era. Okay. So like it was like it was such a big deal. Like everyone was bombing everybody and then the main river that went through Cleveland was super polluted. I actually have a picture of how bad it was. This is how polluted the river was from all the steel mills. They were just yeah. And so throughout red yeah and it got so bad. Why they're the Cleveland Browns? 10:19 It looks like their color. 10:24 like what do you guys want to be our football team? Let's name it after the river of Brown. 10:31 Look at it. That's the same orange. Oh my gosh for the audio listener. It's Cleveland in the nineteen eighties. This is seventy's the seventies and the river is the color of the Brown's helmet. It actually is orange. I mean if you can't make sense that I can't get anyone else. Now I'm pretty sure the Browns started in Baltimore. They're the Baltimore Browns and I'm pretty sure they're named after the founders dog. Okay, but and I don't know if that's true, but I'm pretty sure he's made it up, but 10:59 This does look like the Cleveland Browns colors yeah, but it was so polluted that more than five times throughout the 70s. The river caught on fire. ah Oh, like big time caught on fire. Wow, and so if you're listening, it looks like a fire on the river. Put that out. Yeah, that's a good question. More water. You push it. You push it. Push the fire into the water. 11:25 get that fire underwater. Is it like is it like the you know you know too much about this right? Not ask follow up questions. I know. Is it like the chemicals laying on top of the water? Yes, I do know that there's like oils over the top of it. That's this is burning on the top of the okay the river. Okay, super common. Also this guy seeing okay, let's keep going through the corruption. Go ahead. I'm just going through like this guy is like dang man. Our city's suffering because people have lost their jobs. People are leaving the downtown for suburban areas. 11:53 the rivers brown and on fire. You know what the Cleveland needs well there may be a million and one balloons. Their mayor Ralph Perk. Okay. He he was a little he was I was the word eccentric didn't have a great reputation on the national stage and one day in the 70s this he was mired in a scandal. 12:21 that made national news. was on the front page of newspapers across the country because he was at a uh public, like a very big uh event for the American Society of Metals at the Cleveland Convention Center. they had him cut the ribbon going into the convention, right? But they thought it'd be cool if the ribbon was made of titanium. And they're like, you cut the titanium ribbon. But obviously you can't cut that with scissors. 12:50 so he cut it with uh with a welding torch. People were terrified cut, he cuts it with a laser. No, he cuts it with a welding torch, oh and so he put on the goggles, cuts it with a welding torch and a spark bounced up in his hair and caught his head on fire, and so this picture was on the newspaper, the front page of the paper across the country. 13:19 And look at him. 13:25 Oh my gosh and he lost some hair, but that was really it, and this is what sucks about doing comedy. Do is that we would do that in a tv. I would pitch that for a sketch or a tv show and someone would go there like it's like when people were like parks and rec is too you know over the top and it's like are you are you looking around at real life dude? That's crazy. So this guy he also got an invite to the White House 13:54 and I kid you not because of this or I don't know if it was because of this. I don't know if it was before after this was Nixon in right now. I think so Nixon was sixty nine seventy four so yeah it was during I was thinking of the Republican move in the fifth or all for the polarization and then in the board was seventy four to seventy seven Carter seventy seven to eighty one. That's right anyways, so he got an invite to the White House uh and uh his response dead serious was like I can't make it 14:23 because Tuesday night is bowling night a turn it down because he had a ball. He's like no, no, I'd rather be bowling. Here's a thing dude. People used to do that bowling's important. Bowling's important to me man. I don't know what you expect. President Nixon was it Nixon? Is that what we said? Yeah, that was that was during his term. Okay, so this guy so he well here's okay tangent on the bowling thing now 14:52 I just ordered Robert Putnam's bowling alone book Robert Putnam. Why do I know what he's a social he's a sociologist or is he just a he wrote bowling alone, which is his huge book from the nineties and but it's about how the number of people who bold didn't go down, but the number of people who bold in groups did 15:13 so he became more of an individual uh activity, and so it's a it's a community book, but he's talking about like so like the reason that that he was not what not willing to skip his Tuesday night bowling group is that that's like that's like yeah. That's like if you were like hey, don't go to church on Sunday and for some people, that's like that's my community. That's the only place I can at this bowling yeah interesting anyway, and now we hold nothing sacred. It's true. I don't know if there's anything I would skip to be able to just be home alone on the weekend. uh I love 15:43 sometimes I'll make plans with someone that I know is going to cancel. Yeah, I hear like this will be great because you're not going to and then I always end up right in the window where they're like trying to turn their life around, you know, and they're like I'm trying to cancel less. Oh no, I was really banking on you not doing this. Speaking of people followed through, did you listen to my karaoke this weekend? 16:09 I was I wasn't sure if you were going to think it was mean or funny. Here's what I think. You know when someone wants to make it really obvious that they're too cool for something. Oh my God and and it makes them well you're like all right. You are too cool. My God, here's the here's genuine. I felt like I Alex has no idea what we're talking about, so we have a group chat where it's called Serenade Sunday where every Sunday we take a voice at memo 16:39 of us singing a song and you got to try earnestly to sing this week. I did um something like that, but Tim McGraw yeah and you just you play. You can either play not trying earnestly though. I know how you like that. I was. I was trying to a country accent earnestly. I was trying to do that. It was Labor Day week and I was seventeen. You know that see that's I don't sound good when I sing like Tim McGraw um 17:05 Tim sends a voice memo where he goes, pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and I listened to it and I went, Oh, all right. 17:16 I thought it was funny. The pledge was the last time you did the pledge. I do it every morning. 17:25 do it right now. Can you do the whole thing? I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands one nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all. Would you be able to do that? If you didn't hear me do that on a voice recording yesterday? Yeah, because I do it every morning. I wake up, I look myself dead in the eyes in the mirror because there's the red, white and blue is in my eyes. It's in my heart. I have to look like allegiance to the flag. 17:52 and to the savior for whose kingdom is tan. You're talking about indoctrination dude. I was in third grade doing the allegiance to the Christian flag and then also do you do the pledge of the Bible? We did the pledge to the Bible yeah and I remember a me a lamp into my feet, a light into my path. I remember being so confused as a kid because I went to Christian schools and so we flew the Christian flag outside at our flagpole, but the American flag flew higher. 18:20 And I remember nobody could give me a straight answer why we put the American flag above the Christian flag. I'm like, why isn't God more important to you than this country? And no one could give me a straight answer. The straight answer is that it's illegal not to. 18:34 I mean I know that's true, but if we're going to fly like no one who's in beyond it yeah. You do that. The cop show up sorry got to take you to jail flag flag code violation. Excuse me, it seems like your uh your flags are wrong. Here's my here's my hot takes on the half mass stuff. Okay, we are getting a little out of hand with them. 19:01 yeah, there's there's. I fee? Am I is this bad? Listen, if I see a flag half a bath, I have to ask if I have to Google, wonder why that's half mass, then it shouldn't be. I'm not trying to be insensitive. Yeah, I you agree with me on this. Yeah, it shouldn't be 19:17 it used to be like a president died or like nine eleven happened yeah, and now it's like dude. It's half mass more than its regular mast. I don't know what regular mass is called yeah and I got to google to figure out oh wires is down right now. No, I don't think that that's yeah. That's done my crazy Alex is giving us that at least like yeah. He's like yeah, I mean, but you know I do feel like it's a little yeah. You know if we have this thing that we say all the time 19:47 and like uh computer engineering. If everything is urgent, nothing is urgent. That's what that's what I'm saying feels like. Well, okay, okay, okay. I know we're gonna have big tangent right now. Okay, and I will get to the story later. This is the show welcome, but that kind of goes to the 20:09 the a part a big part of our culture is if some if I say something is important to me, then some people interpret that as the other things aren't important at all like where it's like it's either important or it's not and I'm it's like hey there's different varies like my wife is more important to me than my friends. Oh, so don't care about your friends, no 20:35 you don't talk about yeah yeah, and I think that that is pervaded a lot of anyway. Okay, we rant over put the flags up 20:48 Let's say together. Yeah, I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands one nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all for most for some. 21:10 Hey, thanks for watching our show. you like it, a great way to help out is by being a Patreon supporter. Doing that helps make this show possible, but it also gets a lot of perks for you. You can get every episode a week early ad free. You get access to a Discord where you can meet a lot of other people who love the show and actually hang out with Jaren and I every month on a hangout. And we're also in that Discord chat all the time, hanging, talking with people, talking about episodes and just random stuff in life. It's super fun. 21:33 We do, there's a way to get birthday messages, a free gift, merch discounts in there. So there's a lot of really great reasons to be a Patreon supporter. You get a lot of benefits out of it. And it also makes the show keep happening. So if that sounds great to you, you can go to support.tillin.com or tillin.com slash support, uh or just tillin.com and search around until you find the links uh and become a Patreon supporter. really appreciate you doing that. But if not, right back to the episode, right? 22:06 and if you were listening to that on the podcast and you didn't pull over yeah shame. You're not a patriot get out of here. Why don't you keep driving? So this guy by the name of George Frazier, I don't know if I said his name earlier. He's in Disneyland. He's watches this and he says man Cleveland struggling. You know what we need? We need one of these Cleveland needs something like this just to revitalize the city arm. our our rivers on fire 22:35 Our mayor is on fire! 22:39 We, we got to get some lose then we need this. Okay. And so he goes back to his office in Cleveland after the event, he works for United way. He's the marketing director and he calls up that guy. Uh, what did I say his name was? It was some weird term. Treb. He calls Treb. Yeah. And he says, Hey, is this Treb at balloon are by Treb? And he says, Treb it is. And so he talks to me, tells them all about it. And he says, I want to break that record. And he's like, Oh, I just broke the record. 23:09 and he said, well, I need you to break it again and he's like, I like the way you're thinking there, that's pretty good. Nothing better than breaking a record twice. Am I right? ah First place, trebed second place, that's how I like it. 23:30 in the balloon world. They've got flags hanging half mass that say trev on me. 23:41 he's the balloon guy. Can we be a? Can we make a flag? It's a balloon snake and it says don't treb on me treb on me yeah sure. Okay, so we'll hire an artist 24:07 hey, we're not going to iron artist yeah, we're not gonna. It's not going to be a all right. uh I don't like that. I can see how long we've been recording now and now I'm getting anxious about it and I'm like oh, we got to hurry up the flag code for too good podcast flag, go, and you know what sucks is that we're going to get so many YouTube comments. So like these guys know nothing about flag. 24:36 and here's the thing. Here's the thing. If you're watching on YouTube, you should be a listen to me. Listen, we make way more money. I mean guys so much okay for real low positive. We did make a joke about people watching on YouTube and I honestly didn't know we had that many audio list who were who would feel bad. We were joking like you can still listen on yeah, but you should you should listen on audio, because if you're watching right now, 25:00 You're stealing from us, essentially from us. Yeah, that's that's a joke. It doesn't matter. Thanks for if you're reading a transcript of this in Braille. Thanks for being here. I don't know how you're consuming this body, so George calls Turb and he tells him hey, I love what you did for Dixie. Yeah, I think Cleveland needs this and Turb literally needs this turn straight up is like good luck. That was hard and he's like well, I don't need luck. I need you and Turb was like oh, I'm in 25:29 Yeah, nothing gets the balloon guy in more than inflating his ego and so him and turb start to put together this plan. Sure and oh wait, it was trep to him and trep not turp turp. If a trap start put this play together objectively funnier and so uh george is like okay. Well, this is going to take some funding. He works for united way a non-profit organization and so he wants to make this like a big 25:59 like publicity stunt. uh And so like something to like kind of bring the excitement back to Cleveland. This is 86 now. And so some things have happened like Cleveland is not what it was in the 70s. United Way, along with the local government, has been cleaning up the city. Like the bombs aren't going off anymore. The river's not burning. Some of the factories have opened back up or they've replaced those jobs that were lost. And so like the city's doing better. They revitalized the downtown and it's not the problem that it was. 26:28 before that I've only been to Cleveland a couple times. Yeah. What you think it was for? I love Columbus. Columbus is a cool vibe yeah. I don't think I spent enough time in Cleveland Cincinnati was okay. Cincinnati was very the way that Kansas City used to be Kansas City, probably you know early twenty tens yeah that first half of the ten was very like this part of town school don't go here. Yep, this part of town school not like don't go here, but it's like there's nothing there or it is like 26:58 don't park your car there and leave it yeah attended yeah like not dangerous by any means, but it was just like segregated like here's a here's an area that business is happening and then it's just dead zones around. Here's an area. That's what Cincinnati kind of felt like yeah yeah is Cleveland. No, that's what I mean. That's what Cincinnati just felt like I Cleveland also felt a little bit like that. I guess, but yeah anyway, yeah, I'm a big fan of Ohio. I do like I've never been 27:26 But I do think it looks like a great city. From me scrolling around on Google Maps. You want to do a weekend getaway to Cleveland? I honestly genuinely would love that. 27:40 is the worst step up I've ever seen. Yeah, it was you because you kept your way over here. I got caught on you with God on this. All right, anyways, we can wear those shirts that have like you know, like the drawing of the bikini body on it. Just walk around Cleveland, Cleveland with our 28:05 with our cleavage. Is that where they got the name? I don't think so funny right? I don't know. Did you tell the story? I'm just joking, so he goes and he tells us together a group of the like top like brass of Cleveland, like government people, business owners and he's like guys. I've got an idea to release some balloons yeah yeah and he's like he's like I need some funding for this. How much does that cost? 28:35 I mean, I don't know you figured what ten cents a balloon five cents a balloon. How much were balloons in in the eighties? I know with inflation. Oh no, I set it up and he fell for it. What an idiot. I don't know. I don't know how much it cost. I would guess that they probably I mean today if this happened today, I would say this is a multi million dollar event. Yeah, course from like the infrastructure of it. Maybe the cost of blue itself, but also the labor of putting the heal in the 29:03 Yeah and then just like putting the event rib in my garages, putting together security for it. You need security for our balloons. Yeah, okay, so darts Adam. You never know like you you got to be. You got to be prepared. Okay, so he goes to these people and he kind of puts together his pitch and everybody was like seemed a little ah and someone says this sounds all well and great, but like what does this do for cleveland? A lot of people weren't seeing the bigger picture and he musters up this kind of pitch out of 29:33 nowhere where he's like, he's like, I think that if we can bring Clevelanders together, people from all walks of life, people from all spiritual backgrounds, people to work together from the East side to the West side, from black and white and Hispanic, we can make the impossible possible. And we can show to the world and we can show to Cleveland that Cleveland is great. And the, the, the board essentially that he put together was like, you know what? 30:03 that is the best little pitch we've ever heard and I'm just the eighties because they're like let's do it. I kid you not. That is like a direct quote. Everything I just said from him in an interview. He said that yeah they said that that was the best little pitch we've ever heard and so they signed off on a little pit. I know it's the word little in there. You know the best little bit I heard you know what 30:25 This guy's adorable. Let this weird guy do his balloons. Yeah, this seems like an opportunity to launder some money through it. So just let him do the balloon thing. Jack it up. A couple million dollars. We'll get some money cleaned through this. So they put together some funding for it. They still needed to put together their, what's the word, ah volunteer army. And so what they do you need to do this? ah Well, they figured, ah and I did see it another interview, Trev said, 30:55 If I was doing this by myself, I could put this together a lot quicker. But if we were using volunteers, most volunteers probably gonna do two to three balloons a minute, inflate two to three balloons a minute. He said, I could do way more, but I can't do a million, more than a million balloons by myself. And so I need volunteers to help. And so two to three balloons a minute, we need a few thousand people to help put this together. And so they set their sights on 2 million balloons. Disney did 1 million. They said, we wanna do 2 million. We wanna blow that record out of the water. 31:24 by one upping it one million upping it yeah and so they went around to local schools and they started doing assemblies and they were like how cool would it be if there was like a lot of balloons in Cleveland and the kids really and the kids these are high schoolers in the eighties yeah these are high these are grade school to high school okay so high school assemblies in the eighties so hey what do you guys think about filling up balloons and they're like 31:54 yeah, do whatever you want. You know they're they're cool. They're way too cool for this. They got the puffy hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're way too cool for their like they're smoking in class so much in school. They actually their schools was separate. A lot of people don't know this, but school had smoking and non smoking section. Yeah, when you get there in kindergarten, you want to be in the smoking class or not, we're in class. Yeah, put me in his wrong last and it's like why I get to choose no thanks. I quit a choice. I quit. I quit years ago. 32:24 So he goes to the school and he shows them all the balloons he's done. Yeah. So he shows them the Olympics. He shows them Disney. He shows all these big events that he did the Super Bowl. Like he's done all these big events to balloons and he's like, you can do one of these if you volunteer to help us for Balloon Fest 86. All I need you to do is show up at 3 a.m. and help me inflate 2 million balloons and 3 a.m. Yeah. And so he puts together this army of volunteers, mostly kids. 32:53 but a lot of like, mean, most, most of these kids, their parents came out, full family came out to inflate balloons, but it became this thing where it was like, there was a lot of buzz around it. It was like, we're coming together as a city to break a world record. Guinness book of world records is going to be there. They got a bunch of corporations to jump on. So Coca-Cola sponsored book of world records related to Guinness, beer. Yes, actually. And it's kind of interesting. I've thought about doing an episode, but there wasn't enough. So I can tell you right now, Guinness in the late 18 hundreds was like everybody's constantly in bars. 33:22 like just telling these crazy stories, but we have no way to verify if they're true or not. And so Guinness, the beer family said, what if we put together a group to verify these stories? And so they did. And so the world record book was if people tell a crazy story, call us and we're going to go verify it and put it in the book. And so then they started having the book at their bar and like the original Guinness like distillery or not distillery, a brewery. And then it caught fire and now it's all over the place. 33:52 And that's where it came from. Wow. Because of bar stories. We'll cut that out. 34:00 of it. I'm choking. That is super interesting. Yeah. So get his book of world records is going to be there. Coca-Cola sponsoring the event. Taco bell jumped on Taco Bell's like we'll make the longest burrito ever made to 34:11 like we'll also break. What is the company's trying to freaking jump on stuff to will also break? They've always been doing that. How do we do? We're gonna be here. We're also making a super long also breaking a record to the burritos super long. We can break records also and you're like why? Okay, what does that? We just want to bring Cleveland together. We also want to bring clear also around the eighty nine cent cheesy gordita crunch. What? 34:38 What are you talking about right now? Still a base, still a taco. What does that have nothing to do with baseball? Baseball season's over. Sorry, we're sorry. We're just trying to steal a steal a balloon, steal a talk. was trying to be relevant. What is trying to relevant? You can't forget about us. Don't forget about us. Dude, companies have always been so thirsty for attention. That's crazy. So this became this huge thing. They're like the kid who's like my mom will buy us alcohol. If you guys come over 35:02 and they're like what's like. don't want any worth seven yeah it's eighty seven. Well actually would your mom buy a cigarette smoking is smoking is cool. 35:16 so they start planning for this event. Yeah and okay, try picking a school assemblies with balloons. So have I told you about the guy who came to our school? No, we had the guy from the world's strongest man competitions. You know, man, cut where they flip cars over. This guy was still pretty jacked, but his that he was he held the records for whatever was strongest lungs and he would come do the anti smoking speech at our school and he could bowl up those long balloons. 35:43 yeah with his like just his mouth yeah, which is impressive. Yeah, is it impressive enough to do a forty five minutes school assembly over them where you're like? No, it doesn't happen that fast. It's very okay. I could do that then let's be honest. I can do that and then like he's not super talented at making balloon animal stuff. Yeah, he does the thing and he goes. If you don't smoke 36:10 you can do this too. Oh, so he's just an average guy. Yeah, I don't think you let's we'll get balloons for the next. I was do that for sure. got a hundred percent. I'm trying to do it I have good lungs. Yeah, I've got good lungs to Tim. Yeah, wait to see these lungs boy. Don't look at me like that. Who thinks? Who do you think has the better lungs? Leave it in the comments now. So Treb Treb is says he says hey, uh 36:39 when we did a million balloons at Disney, what we did is we had a thousand of these bags and you can see it and it was a thousand bags of a thousand yeah and so we had a thousand people that ripped open these bags and then we had the million balloons in the air and he said with two million balloons. I don't think this is feasible because that's two thousand people holding up 37:01 bags of a thousand balloons. And he said, I just don't think we can get that many people into the square in Cleveland where they were going to do it. It was too tight. And so to also be releasing and ripping up balloons, they just didn't think it was realistic. So they got a group of engineers together to build an enclosure. Oh my God. was they had this big, huge square in downtown Cleveland and they built this frame and then attached nets to the frame. 37:27 and they said okay, everyone's going to sit under there. They're going to put the balloons together and flight them and just release them into the net and so day of the event rolls around, which is what day nineteen 37:42 September twenty seven, nineteen eighty six, September twenty seven. Yeah, I should say right before September twenty six, nineteen eighty six. They're all in Cleveland, ready for this big event. The city's. What are you in town for? I want to put a bunch of balloons up balloons, loons, excuse me, loons, loons. I call them that for short balloon takes too much to say. 38:06 You would know if you were in the industry, you get it. I want a week long punk. You're too weak. You've been smoking. Haven't you? Yeah, I could tell so so number twenty six traps in his in his hotel. Okay, and a microbe. think it about a microburst comes through town. Big storm causes a ton of damage throughout the city. Sixty mile an hour winds just kind of out of the blue. Oh, they knew there was going to be a storm. They didn't know it's going to be the severe of a storm. 38:36 And it actually damages some of the netting. so they're very concerned about whether or not this event can really happen. They're looking at the forecast. It looks like there's a chance it'll rain the next day. But the organizers are like, well, we really want this to go on. George comes to Treb and he says, hey, look, one of our nets is damaged. But he said, but I think our crew can handle this. And so he says, why don't you just go to bed? And he said, we're going to take care of the nets. We'll see you in the morning. 39:05 George and the construction crew, they go out there, they're out, they pull an all nighter repairing the nets. Okay. They get everything put together. There's one edge of one of the nets. That's a little wonky finicky, but they said we can, we, think we can still release everything. That's just going to stay attached because originally the plan was the nets were all going to be removed. Sure. And then it was going to release when the time came to release them. They're like, we can just leave this one section of the balloons, but there is a little bit of a little bit of nerves because there's the chance of a storm the next day. 39:36 Hey, thanks for listening to things I learned last night. It would do us a huge favor if you could just share this episode with somebody or just share the show. Tell someone you like it. That helps us grow the show. Another way to help us grow the show is to support our merch, which is actually super comfy. We changed to a new merch supplier a couple of years ago called fourth wall. You can buy our stuff at shop.tillin.com. None of this is a pressure by the way, but it just really does help us grow the show and it helps, you know, get the word out and people ask me about my hoodie in the airport all the time. So they're really comfy. Would love for you to support the show. 40:06 And either way, thanks for being here. We're glad that we get to do this podcast. 40:14 next day they wake up 3 a.m. and thousands of kids and their families are in downtown Cleveland already, three o'clock in the morning, ready to put together these balloons. And they tell the story of this event because all these people were putting together these balloons and they're putting together and tying thousands of balloons. And I got to the point where you looked around this weird enclosure that they built and everybody had like their fingers all taped up because they were like, 40:42 cutting their fingers from tying so many balloons. And so everybody had these weird like duct tape ties around their fingers to like protect their fingers from how many balloons they were tying all day. um So there's this army of reverse fingerless gloves uh all around this enclosure. And by early afternoon, uh the public square in Cleveland looked like this. um Oh my gosh. 41:08 because they're and you can kind of see in this. So you're tying the balloon, just kind of letting it go to get up to the net. Yeah. And it was just the net was catching it. You can kind of see everyone's just sitting at a table and on the table there's all these helium tanks and the families are just sitting there tying balloons all day, just kind of chit chat and gossiping, tying balloons and releasing them and filling up this giant net in the middle of the public square of downtown Cleveland. OK. um And as the day goes on, it looks cool. It looks pretty neat. Like it looks this looks like. 41:37 uh The Skittles jar or not the Skittles jar this the the sprinkles jar. Yeah cold stone uh and so as the day goes on uh They start to kind of hear okay. Hey look that storm is starting to head in We need to start to be prepared to launch early because there's a chance we got to get this out of here right or things go south Because we can't launch all these balloons in like a middle of a storm uh And so they're kind of I don't want to say rushing but they're kind of there's this idea that they're like kind of racing against the clock a little bit 42:07 They're putting these things together. And as they're getting close to the end, the finish line, uh they end up uh realizing the net just keeps getting caught on all the bolts for the frame that they had put together. And so they're sitting there and they're like, I don't know if this is actually going to actually release because it's catching these bolts. so Treb says, you know what? I think I know what we can do. And so he goes into the hotel and he just starts rounding up plastic trash cans from the hotel. 42:36 And then he starts cutting up the trash cans and just building little enclosures for all the bolts. And so that way it would just slide around the plastic and wouldn't have anything to catch on. so there's like a lot of a lot of quick things, small little things, little details. And then finally, they are they get news from the National Weather Service that, hey, we do think that the storm is going to come in about an hour early. And they said that's perfect because we're looking out here and we did it. We've got all the balloons we were looking to get. 43:05 at this point they had they had lowered their sites to one point five million. I don't think they had enough volunteers to get to two but they still clear the record yeah by five hundred thousand and so they said everybody's just kind of hanging out. We're in party mode. We're just waiting for the release and so they said why don't we just release early at this point. There are two hundred thousand people in downtown Cleveland. They said that the attendance to this event was the only thing in the entire twentieth century that rivaled it was the end of World War Two. uh 43:34 And so there was, this was a big deal for Cleveland. It was packed. Everybody's excited for this. And so then they said, okay, it's time to go. And they pulled the releases and the net starts to open up and swell out. And so the way this worked is I believe all these balloons were like acting as like almost tie down the big ones. They released them and then they started to lift the net up and 1.5 million balloons lifted up. 44:03 and spread across the skyline. This is not as good of this from the news helicopter. Yeah. And just enveloped downtown Cleveland uh and covered the entire city. That's pretty cool. And it's really cool if you watch the video because people, this was one of the wildest things anybody had ever seen in their life. The George, the guy who did it, I watched an interview. He said, he described it like a uh atom bomb of joy, which it does kind of look. 44:32 That's cool. It's not, it's probably insensitive to call it that. 44:40 ah But things didn't stay joyful for long ah because that storm did end up coming through. And that storm front, what happened is it caused a lot. What they expected is, and what normally happens in these balloon releases is the balloons go up and then they kind of go in the atmosphere and they disappear. You never have to think about them again. That is what happens to them. What they expected is that most of them are going to pop or deflate and come flood. 45:08 falling back down. It's the eighties. No one cares about pollution yet and so everyone's just like who cares there'll be trash somewhere. People pick it up but not here yeah. We won't have to worry about it. Imagine you're in a town near Cleveland. You have no idea what's going on and all of a sudden you just see a cloud of point five million balloons descending on your day. You don't know their balloons when you see them. Yeah, they're just it's just like a real ad a bomb. You're like we're being attacked. 45:37 it's the cold war era right. Yeah, the eighties yeah, we're all dead, we're done, we're done for okay, so these come crashing back down to earth and yes, they're just balloons, but there's so many of them that it's affecting visibility and there are car accidents all over the city of real who just couldn't see enough and so they were hit and running in other cars and there was crashes happen because the change in pressure in the 46:04 What? What you said because the storm is rolling. Oh yeah, I thought you were talking about the crashes that like no the pressure change. You're like I can't drive anymore. No, the change in atmospheric pressure is yeah forcing the balloons for the balloons back down. Yeah, as they all came down, it continued to go up yeah and they ended up going into Lake Erie and just filling Lake Erie with all these balloons and this ended up being a really big deal because the night before an hour before that microburst came through 46:33 a couple of fishermen went out on Lake Erie to go fishing and the microburst came in that they weren't expecting and then they went missing. And so that day there was a Coast Guard search trying to find these guys and they said in a report they said what most of our searches are is we're going around. We're looking for heads on the water and they and they said how are you going to out what's these as a person and not a balloon. Oh no. So they 47:03 were and to make matters even worse, the airspace around it was so crowded that they had to call in a fly zone because you couldn't fly through all these balloons because they were just kind of getting pushed down. so this ended up becoming this disaster that led to millions of dollars worth of damages and ended up causing lots and lots of injuries. There's a report of a local stable, I guess is the word for it, place where you keep horses. That's a stable. 47:29 Ranch, that's the word. came in and all the balloons spooked the horses because they've never seen balloons and they've also never seen that many balloons at once and they ended up getting injured. uh so the Wikipedia page actually literally says non-fatal injuries, multiple horses ah were injured in the event. then ah those fishermen, ended up later recovering the bodies and the public was blaming the. 47:57 balloons. If the balloons weren't there, maybe they could have found them earlier. And so this became this whole scandal and the family of the fishermen, the families of the fishermen came forward. They sued United Way for millions of dollars. The ranchers whose horses were injured sued United Way. The people who were involved in car accidents sued. There's other damage to property all throughout the city that came forward and sued. So United Way expected this to be this big event where a ton of 48:24 uh publicity would come and turn around the bad perception of Cleveland in this era. And it actually soured it even worse and cost them way more. Yeah, because of all the settlements. And so in the year since this has become like this urban legend almost no, it's not a legend because it's true story. Just this big thing that you hear people talk about, how big a failure. Yeah. Balloon Fest 86 was because it was such a big failure. It's kind of like Firefest before Firefest. Sure. 48:54 But here's what's interesting. None of what I just said is true. All of this story of everything that happened, of the million dollars in damage, the injuries, the people dying, all of this stuff isn't true. And it's something that you hear everybody talk about when they talk about Balloonfest86. If you've heard about this before and you're like listening to this episode, like, yeah, I remember hearing about how big of a failure it is. It's not true. What happened is... 49:22 about a decade after Balloonfest 86. Balloonfest happened, went off without a hitch. There was a lot of balloons that fell, that storm did come in, a lot of balloons fell. There was a 10 car pile up on the freeway, but that 10 car pile up was because someone was distracted watching the balloons launch, not because they fell and they got in their way. It was them just seeing it and then crashing. And there was no like major injuries in it. There was damage. There was no major injuries. 49:50 There was a couple of other car accidents that day, all the rest of the car accidents could only be attributed to just like regular causes. Like it wasn't had nothing to do with the balloons. Right. There was all those balloons that fell in the water and there was that search for those those two fishermen. But after the fact and autopsy revealed that they had died long before Balloonfest even happened. And so, yes, it did impact the search, but it wouldn't have mattered if that was there or not. They wouldn't have been able to save those fishermen. What happened was 50:20 somebody and ah we don't know if there was another interview but somebody had interviewed someone who was involved with the planning of balloon fest not george not treb but somebody else on the team at united way for the local paper in um cleveland cleveland and when they recorded for that the paper was called the plane dealer and they did this interview and after the interview ah the person said that 50:49 when they did this interview, they presented everything that happened and they felt like it was an accurate, like from the conversation. Right. And then this article came out and it called it this major disaster and, and told all these stories of all this damage and all these lawsuits and all this stuff. And she's like, that's not what happened in this interview at all. And they said, George ended up calling the paper and was like, Hey, that's a lie. Like half the stuff in this paper is just not true. Right. And so he ended up speaking to the editor and the editor pulled the story. 51:18 And the editor was like, oh, I'm sorry. is done. Yeah. They said there was some stuff that was kind of liberties were taken in the telling of the story that made it sound more extreme than was because what did happen is the family of those fishermen did sue United Way, but they settled outside of court and the United Way, the report was they got sued for millions of dollars and they settled for millions of dollars outside of court. But what really happened is United Way had insurance for this event. They went out and got an insurance policy and they paid just to cover the legal fees of the family. And so it was like a $5,000 settlement outside of court. 51:48 And then again, with the horses, there was a lawsuit for that, but the courts threw it out. And so United Way ended up paying them a few thousand dollars just for to cover their legal fees from that. So they kind of came forward and they were like, that was a big misunderstanding. We're sorry about it. We're going to go ahead and cover your legal fees. they did not get sued. There was not millions of dollars of damages. None of that stuff happened. There was that one car accident uh and then some other around, none of that related. And it all comes back to this one paper. 52:17 and this paper got circulated enough to where there are copies of it that exist out in the world. And then when the internet became such a big thing, somebody found this and then they amplified the story even more on the internet. And now it's so bad to the point where every podcast, every TikTok, every YouTube video, the Wikipedia page talks about this being such a bad event. But if you go and you watch from people who were actually there, people who lived in Cleveland, from the people who organized it, 52:46 from Treb and from the government there, and the Coast Guard, they'll all say none of that is true. They didn't shut down the airspace because there was too many airplanes. They called ahead of the time for the event and they said, hey, we're going to launch this. And so they set up a no-fly zone before the event that was already established. And so there was all this stuff that was made to seem... Misconstrued. Yeah. uh And it just kind of shows how hard it is to know how true a story is. 53:15 because this really is. This really was fire fest before fire fest right and this was the thing, especially on the internet in the early days. The internet was where if you wanted to call something colossal fair, you would it balloon fest because this was a colossal fair, but it wasn't like it was a they did get a spot in the Guinness Book of World Records. They broke the record. Everybody who was there said they had a great time. Nobody acted like it was a bad event. Nobody got injured and there was just a coincidence that those fishermen died the night before and it was yeah, it wasn't. It was a big success. Yeah, 53:44 but it was seen as a failure yeah because somebody misreported on it, but the mayor's hair did catch on fire. Mayor's hair definitely did catch on fire. That's hilarious. 53:56 and so it's crazy because that it's crazy because the goal was to make Cleveland look better and it did for a little bit until Cleveland's own paper sabotaged it wow, which is nuts. So that's balloon fest eighty six a huge success according to us. 54:17 They were. It wasn't bad. It was a good event. Wow. Yeah, I like when you end stories with, by the way, none of that was true. 54:29 that's crazy. I mean how could this be a bad? You know yeah, it does look like it looks like a nuclear bomb of fun. 54:41 they kept those things in a net like Alcatraz. It's all a good time. It's all a good time. I got bombed at balloon fest. That's crazy man. Yeah, that's that's well, I guess the record set. Yeah. And what's crazy. I forgot to mention all these corporations got involved in this to kind of sponsor and put their mark on it. You had Coca-Cola. You had Taco Bell. I mentioned them right. A of people don't know that 55:10 hell sponsored this and they actually had the devil there pulling off hell sponsored by hell. Hey, that's the episode. Please share this with somebody helps our girl grow our show. If you want to listen to other episodes, we did an episode about the balloon boy hoax, which is where a family had their kid in a balloon that was floating over Colorado and it turned out to not be true the whole time. So and then if you want next week's episode right now, it's available to our patreon supporters. Just another way to help grow the show. 55:39 We really do appreciate you being here. We love this podcast. I hope that you enjoy it as well. We'll see you next week.


In 1986, Cleveland made history with a bold and colorful idea. Organizers set out to release more balloons than anyone had ever attempted before. The event, known as Balloonfest 86, promised to unite the city and showcase its spirit on a national stage. What unfolded became one of the most unforgettable spectacles in Cleveland’s history. Why Balloonfest ’86 Happened Cleveland … Read More

His Therapist Took His House | Ike Herschkopf Ep 286

09-09-25

Episode Transcription

00:00 Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of the shags? 00:06 What are you doing right now? 00:11 What are you- What is this? uh 00:18 Hey man, are you just like kidnapping this episode? I've already intro did I would have to do this? Have you ever heard of Joe Nassara? Oh my God, let me Google on real quick. So I hate that I did all this preparation for this for nothing. Oh, I felt bad when you were like I'm down on all these images. Hold on to stuff and I was like all right, that's all way I got it. 00:48 He's wearing a long sleeve. Oh, my teeth with hairy arm, baby. 01:00 Oh yeah, I got Alex to go so that counts things I learned last night. 01:19 Okay, so ah who is this? Jonah Sarah? Is this this guy that you keep telling me to do episodes about? No, this is it. Is this the guy that you keep telling me to do episodes about? No, Jonah Sarah is a journalist. Okay, he's okay. Put your laptop away. Okay, tell me more. Let's get a second here so I can make sure I get my images pulled up. Oh my gosh. Do you have pro presenter? Yeah. Do know how to do? Have you talked to Alex? Do you know how to do this? Oh, oh wow, 01:47 Oh wait, just Jaren know how to do anything is Jaren competent yeah buddy. Oh, don't worry about that crap. Okay, I'm not worrying okay, so what you show me a picture of him again. Let me see him. Let me guess what he does. Yeah. Can you guess what I just told you he does? This is like a journalist. Yeah, so this is this is Joe Yorker 02:14 This is Joe Nasser. He works for he's written for several things. The Esquire, GQ, Fortune, New York Times, right? Close. Did you think he was New York looking? He looks like he works for the New Yorker. He looks a little pretentious is why I'm saying he does look like he is wearing like a light brown suit jacket. He does look like a with a like librarian at a college, not a town library. Exactly like he's got a black vest, a light blue shirt and then this brown suit jacket. None of it matches. Yeah, 02:43 but he cool glasses and he's like in front of like the black screen like this is clear like a public access television and interview yeah thing right. So Jonah Sarah, you know he's written for different things. You typically business power structures kind of uh corruption yeah, so Jonah Sarah is he's a he's a columnist. He's a reporter. He 03:09 uh And by the 2000s, you know, he's respected. He's got a reputation. he's he exposes a lot of stories in the financial and healthcare, that kind of stuff. Right. So he's a successful reporter. So I mean, so this is the story you keep telling me. So he buys a home in the hamptons. Gosh. Right. And you know, I know something really funny about this. Genuinely, I'm not even exaggerating. I queued up that podcast. I was like, okay, I'm going to start this on the way home today. Today, I'm genuine. 03:37 genuinely. I was like on the way home from that's a different story. This is about Joe. The same. This is the story I guess. I guess if we're going to be honest, it's been about three and a half, maybe four years of you telling me to check this out. So I guess maybe it makes sense that you would jump the gun on me a little bit. Three years you think I've been telling you to tell you that story for three years. It's been a while. I don't know if in a while years, but that's a different story. It's been three years. Yeah, 04:03 it's actually been four years, but genuinely I was I not even exaggerate when I say that's what I was going to listen to on the way home from this. is about Joe Sarah. I was going to listen to this on the way home for this shoot and then I was going to because I figure we put out about a month before our next shoot. I was like I was going to open it up with this. I was looking forward to the moment where I do the big reveal. Maybe I'll still do it sure you could because this is about a different topic pretty funny. If you so Sarah buys a house in the Hamptons, he and his wife dawn. They moved to the Hamptons right 04:33 and and they live next to a guy named Isaac Stevens. The mailbox says Isaac Stevens and that guy's name is Ike Herpchkof isn't it yeah, so that's it something different. If you trust me, okay, so maybe I will listen to that other way. Oh sure, that's a different. don't know if I'm going to now the mailbox. I feel a little weird about it mailbox next door says Isaac Stevens and this is like this is a pretty you know the Hamptons are lavish right. This is where rich people name is on the mailbox, name on the house number 05:03 it a rich person thing to do. I mean the Hamptons yeah you got. I mean you know your neighbors, it's kind of like there's it's the side South Hamptons. You know is this this is the two thousands so hard it is when someone asks you what year it is yeah when you're not prepared. I am prepared so prepared what I'm saying though is Isaac Stevens house is like a party house. I'm locked in there's so many parties at this house and not like 05:29 not like rager parties yeah yeah is at this point he's let's see. Let me do the math. He's you know fifties so he's an older guy. saying you're saying these are like are these like these are like I mean dinner parties like Gatsby parties or like I know if like there's valet parking there's 05:49 This isn't like- Cool parties, there's big, it's not like just a back yard barbecue. is like- college parties. Yeah, it's not like ragers, but there's a lot of lavish parties next door and catered and important guests, like celebrities have shown up. Is Joe getting invited? Joe's not getting invited, but he just goes next door. know, and maybe that's kind of where this, he kind of gets this little, you know? And over time, he notices that there's, 06:17 there's a guy in a green polo shirt who works these events right. He notices the guy in a green polo shirt who is always taking out the trash. He's preparing food, he's offering guests drinks and this guy is obviously like a hired help. He's like a caretaker of the house right and so when when Isaac Stevens is not there, this guy is usually there taking care of the property stuff right. So this guy is out there to ruin the hedges. The groundskeeper is 06:47 And Joe goes over and so I said, what time our competition he conversation he goes, hey, you know, I've noticed you for the past couple of years. I've noticed that you, you take really good care of this property and all that. he goes, oh yeah, thanks man. He goes, what's your name? He goes, my name is Marty Markowitz. Okay. He was okay. Uh, in talking with Marty and he casually Marty at this point, Marty is, I'm gonna do the math. Sorry. Um, Marty's 60. 07:13 at this point, where body go to high school. This is this is July of two thousand and ten at this point, so he's lived next door to this house for several years. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for almost ten years at this point, right. You ever watch summer house? No, what summer house summer house is this group of like young, hot New York singles at this point they're all married, but they're like and they go. They rent a house in the Hamptons every summer for the whole summer and then every weekend they just go out 07:41 and they stay there for the weekend every weekend and I bring this up for a couple reasons. One, I really like the show and I'm a little embarrassed about it. It's like a you know, it's trash reality, but it's not even trash reality. Like my wife sort of watching freaking love island. Yeah, that's any time I walk in living room, I was like you are filling your mind with crap. This is that is that's genuine. It's like reality. It's like not even like I enjoy some trash reality. I watched the sister wife show. Yeah, I love just dumb. 08:10 That is like, I don't even, I can't, whatever. Yeah, that's rough. This is not like that. This is kind of like a real housewives type show. And there are moments where it's pretty trashy, but there's a lot of it. That's just like, kind of connect with the characters and like you'd like to watch the, now follow some of them on social media, which I feel weird about. But anyways, all that to say, they rent this house in the Hamptons the whole summer. And I mean, they're splitting it like eight ways. And I mean, I guess at this point they got the show now and the show's probably paying for it. um 08:39 but I don't think it was a reason. think they were doing this on their own before uh and it's I don't know. Like I think it's good to do stuff like that. Well, the thing is that I've you and I talked recently about how I don't feel like I've invested in relationships and I watched that and I'm like I'm like man, it'd be nice to have a group of friends that you just go rent a house in the Hamptons with every weekend. I mean we I would move in every weekend, but like after our wedding, especially my birthday trip, we're so fun. 09:04 We were just like, why are we waiting for major events to do stuff like that? Like, for sure, let's just go share an Airbnb for a week. Yeah, a hundred percent. That was great. And I don't know. I loved that whole week and that I just I mean, and the bonus was like I married at the end, you know, but it's like, but like that's fair. Even before it was like, this is I love this. It was super fun. I talked to my counselor about that yesterday and I cried. We don't have to talk about that, but I did the Airbnb for my wedding. Well, you cried about it. Yeah, yeah, we talked about that in the after the fail. 09:34 I'm going to be honest with you. What did you cry? I never played on telling you that, but I here we are. I'll tell you we can talk about the out of the my dream. My hope is so this is this is a real like this is one of those like wow. If everything turned out perfect, this will happen. I think I told you this California's working on legislation that would make it so that companies can't own single family homes. Oh yeah, like so like you can't own a property that's designed to be you know you can own a multi unit property. 10:01 which is actually going to end up turning a lot of homes into multi-unit, which is unfortunate. But one of the taxes they're doing is they're trying to stamp out some of these Airbnb's who are just buying up houses. Because some of these companies own 100 something properties. But if that went through, then that house that we got married at would become available. That would be clutch. And I am just speaking it into existence that my career would take off in a way that would coincide with the passing that law, that that house would become available and then we could buy that. 10:30 You'll be able to move in and finally get the raccoon out of those vents. It's down there. anyways, what I'm saying is it makes me jealous every time I watch the show. like, I know I can't feasibly rent an Airbnb every weekend with my friends in the Hamptons. It's not even an Airbnb. Yeah, but dude, that stuff, it's manufactured to do that. Like those people get to hang out with each other because they don't have other obligations. Like that's the whole thing about like the homesteading and the uh tradwife content is that it's subsidized. 11:00 by a high income. Also when they're making money from social media, that's interesting. mean, they're all making money off social media. They're all making money off the show. Of course, if you show like my wife, the TragWife content where she's just at home and she's making sourdough today and her... It's also several of them have nannies. Come on. ah But it's pitching like a, yeah, my life would be great if I didn't have... 11:24 obligations and stuff to work and I didn't have to go make money to pay bills. Yeah, of course life would be great and I could just hang out with my friends all day yeah yeah and that's what they're selling you. I mean that I think that's the thing with the people on this show is they're making like ten thousand an episode. Yeah, they also all have careers in New York City, which are probably paying pretty well and they're also all influencers right, so they're all making a lot of money, so it's like and so the parties though are they ragers that we're saying like the summer house is it a rager of them are ragers. Not all of them are ragers like 11:54 I would honestly like, yeah, some of them are ragers, some of them aren't. But anyway, the point I'm trying to make is like I see that and like this, that TV series that you watch that you're like, it's not very good, but it's like kind of interesting. They go on vacation every year with their friends for like 50 years, like every quarter with their friends, for like whatever it was, like 50 years. I watched that and I'm like, I feel like for the last 10 years since I graduated college, really, I haven't really invested in relationships and I see this stuff and I'm like, it would be like, it's not hard. 12:24 to just get people together a couple times a year to do something fun. It is hard. You're right. I just don't want you to think that it's like oh, it's not hard to do that. It is hard right. Actually, you're right. You know yeah, you're right. Anyway, so it's I mean like how many times have you and I tried to hang out outside the podcast? Yeah, it's hard. Yeah, it is tough to do and that's okay. Yeah, yeah, I guess you're right. You know yeah, but also this is what I've been telling my wife. We need to invite more people over just to hang out at our house. We don't have anywhere to go with our friends. That's like 12:53 not spending a hundred dollars. That is true. That is true. So anyway, yeah, tell me about these rangers in the Hamptons Rangers, ragers, ragers. I was like, what are you talking about? The Rangers? Well, they're not ragers either. They're lavish parties right there and they're pretty often almost every weekend during the summer. There's parties and all this stuff right and this is summer house. Yeah, well and Marty Markowitz is on the property most of time taking care of the stuff he's he's 13:18 cleaning up after all the parties, he's keeping all the trash, he's going around serving guests and all this stuff, while Isaac Stevens is mingling and doing the whole stuff, right? And so, um Isaac... Has he met Isaac Stevens? Yes. Joe? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Joe has met Isaac Stevens before. And so he says to Marty, he says, well, that's a beautiful property. mean, uh it's really great. Do you have pictures of the property? Yeah. Yeah, I want to see it. um 13:47 The interesting thing about the Hamptons is like every house in the Hamptons is like six hundred million dollars. That's an exaggeration, but it really is like every house is like tens of millions of dollars and some are hundreds of millions of dollars, which is bananas. So this is the house that we're talking about. Okay, yeah, it's a I think it's a beautiful lot of sunlight, lots of thing, you know, is not what I pictured at all. Yeah, I love the atrium of top like that that sunroom. Honestly, that looks just like the top of 14:17 Was it rigs out of angel windies? Oh yeah, he put a windies on the second floor of his house. Yeah, that's pretty cool. So this is the house. It's a pretty, you know, lot of big windows, big pool in the backyard. Yeah and so there's a lot of stuff to take care of around the property. This is a picture of Marty, by the way. That's what Marty looks like. Okay, so you now what I pictured, but yeah, this is him older. Obviously, is he holding a lawsuit? I don't know what he's holding. This is just a picture I found of him. I think he's the background. That is his. I don't know who that is. That party, his sister, 14:47 uh okay, there's a gong. Is that a gong up there like a gong says marty ah just a normal kind of guy like you know, an assuming kind of guy, and if you saw this guy in the Hamptons, you would honestly you know, because he looks like this yeah. You know he's he doesn't present himself as like a rich kind of guy or is the guy who cleans the property. This is the guy who takes he's the caretaker of the property yes and he he I do want to make abundantly clear to our audience. 15:13 that he has his laptop on his table and he's got it on one of those Mountie thingies. I feel like that tells you right there how old he is. That's very So that's Marty. And so Joe says to Marty, he says, you know, I love this house. Isaac's done pretty well for himself. And Marty says to Joe, oh, actually this is my house. And Joe says, what do you mean? And so Marty says, let me tell you a story. 15:43 So we got to rewind back to Marty's life. So Marty is born into a Jewish family in New York, right? Is Marty a psychologist? Marty's not a psychologist, no. His parents run a successful fabric business called Associated Fabrics Corporation. And Marty has an older sister named Phyllis. um Marty's shy, he's an obedient, good kid, conflict-averse, doesn't try to do a whole lot of stuff, very avoids confrontation. His father's, you 16:13 emotionally harsh, of like a, you know, foreboding kind of father and his mother's distant and you kind of, um, you're shaking your legs. Like you're very anxious right now. I'm so anxious right now. Uh, I just, don't know what to do with my legs. I don't know what to do with my legs. I don't know what to do. Just sit still buddy. Okay. So, you know, they run this fabric store in New York. It's a, um, they're, they're a normal family. They're going to small business. 16:41 So Marty's around the business a lot. So it's one of those things where you know if you're starting a business and you have your two kids, they're kind of more in the way than they're not in the way. And so Marty kind of grows up. Wait, how old are the kids? I mean, this is his entire childhood. Okay, right. So he's born in the fifties. No, no, no. He's born in the forties. I don't actually know what year he's born. That's fine, ah but anyway, so we get to his. What I'm saying is 17:07 The family dynamic is the family, his father's very focused on the business. And his mother is very distant, critical, especially about his weight and decisions. And Marty grows up feeling kind like an afterthought, maybe useful but not loved by his family. So in his late 30s, Marty's now running the family business. And in 1980, he is 38. 17:36 in nine so did his parents retire or they dead? I was just getting very say they both died within six months apart. Harp so that is that is really tough on him. Well, like was it like one of them died and then the other one was like a broken heart or was it like they both died? Did they have natural causes? I yeah they got. I mean it doesn't they weren't like murder or something, but yeah they both of his parents recently died. I'm sketched out about Marty. I'm not going to lie that you think he did it 18:05 think he did it. With fabrics? I think there is something. So inherits the estate and he actually becomes the sole owner. He has an older sister, but he's the sole owner of the company. Okay. Okay. The company is passed down to him. I'm not a hundred percent sure what his sister got, but he gets the fabrics company. So now he runs Associated Fabrics. And it's like, like they did well. Like, or is it like they good? I mean, they do everything from home curtains and like fabrics for chairs to a theater buying that giant curtain. You know? Okay. Yeah. 18:34 Like, and they're in New York, they're selling. yeah, big theater. Yeah, it's a business. It's a thriving business, right? But this, his parents dying kind of puts him in a little bit of a funk, because now he's the sole owner. He's making the decisions. And like you said, his mom, when he's growing up, of really put a lot of pressure on him for his inability to make decisions. So he actually starts having frequent panic attacks. So during some of these meetings or difficult conversations at work, 19:03 like he would avoid answering the phone. Clients would come in and he would legitimately go hide in the is Isaac a psychologist, Isaac Stevens, yeah, it's Isaac I curbs, go this no. What is your deal? You're trying to figure stuff out. I was so skeptical about this story. Oh Marty 19:25 he's like negotiating contract. He goes because so overwhelmed that he literally hides behind a curtain in his office right. His employees are losing confidence in him anyway, so he tell he's literally hot of the his employees come in. They're like Marni and he's he's back there just he's clear like you know when you see a kid hiding behind a curtain you're going to you know and you're like oh come in there like Marty. What would you do though parties out here? What would you do if you walked in your boss's office and they were doing that though you just go 19:55 Okay, yeah, that's a good question. I don't know how you respond to that. You tell the rest of the office for sure. You got to go look at Marty's office real quick. Everyone go knock on his door today. Everyone take a look at there. Just see yeah yeah, it's a ground level office. He's overwhelmed at work is what I mean. Yes, me too and you too and so he confides in his sister Phyllis and he says he feels like he's shrinking inside like he feels. This doesn't own the 20:23 Phyllis is not involved with the fabric company. She's not involved. But she's rich. Yeah, mean, she got a push of inheritance as well. it's fine, right? So she sees her brother spiraling, she feels terrible about this. And so she suggests to him that he should see a psychiatrist. 20:44 So she gives him the contact for their rabbi who refers him to a really young, energetic Manhattan psychiatrist named Dr. Isaac Hershkopf. 20:56 I thought it was Ike. It is Ike is short for Isaac. Is it really the mailbox really does say Isaac Stevens, though, and we'll get to that interesting, but I knew that would throw you. I knew that would bury it a little bit. It does so I still listen to this a little. This is I curse. You really should go listen to the because we'll get to we'll get to the whole thing. We'll get to the whole thing. So Ike Herskoff is a psychiatrist and so Marty makes his appointment reluctantly and he's like. I don't think anyone can fix was wrong with me, but he calls the number anyway yeah right now we're in nineteen eighty one. 21:24 I already is thirty and this was this is an important, an important note about the eighties is people were very skeptical of psychiatrists back then yeah like it was weird. I mean honestly until like the late twenty tens like it was almost kind of taboo to see a psychiatrist or a counselor of any way yeah. mean mental health itself was kind of like you know. I think there was there was this idea that a psychiatrist was going to drug you up and then you would just like not be yourself. 21:53 and and more than that, there was the idea of like what what can talking about your feelings do for real, but like for real yeah yeah yeah. So he goes into his appointment with dr eich herschkopf. Now this is dr eich in his office with all of his degree honestly love him. This guy gosh I'm so I'm not going to lie. He does ooze charisma to be honest. There is something about and I don't know a way to say this without me sounding so weird, but I had some friends like this 22:22 whose dads were like this. And there's something about the early 2000s, mid 2000s, those dads who wore the oversized polos and had just the hairiest arms. ah And like, you just can't help but respect them. I don't know what it is about that. 22:39 but you just see those here. You push the arts sticking out of those sleeves that are way too long and you're just like that guy. You keep going back. is someone I should know you should keep talking. So rich. I don't know what it is. uh Is there something I could do to make my arms bushier? I respect that guy 23:06 so I don't know if you can tell the audio listener, but he doesn't have hairy arms and apparently for Tim, that's like that's a sign of respect. That's a big 23:14 so he is wearing a large polo. This is eighty one. This is nineteen eighty one. Holy cow! This guy's ahead of the times. I expect even more in his office. He's a typical. You know he's got several degrees up on the wall behind him and books everywhere and so honestly running suspicious number of degrees. I'm not yeah like yeah several degrees up there. Yeah, he is a legitimate psychiatrist. My parents had that picture to actually is it of the doctor's office? I well, I'm going to be honest now that I say that a lot. don't know if my parents have that picture, but I know that picture. I don't maybe my parents 23:44 isn't it somebody I know had that picture of that kid looking at that thing real close yeah interesting. So um yeah, he's a legitimate psychiatrist is real, so he's like a real real doctor, cool, cool, cool, great. So this is doctor I with his really hairy arms and so Marty shows up to Ike's office on Park Avenue. Okay, and he's he walks in. He's impressed with all the you know all the diplomas and and and he was wearing well tailored suit that day. 24:13 okay, I was wearing a well. So she couldn't even see the R C didn't know you have to see him, but I exudes a level of confidence and maybe that role is to see arms that are that I who's like waiting back in the chair and just with his arms that unkempt with a polo that doesn't fit yeah, but he still just exudes confidence. You're like you look pretty rough right now, but like I trust you because you're so confident you there's like two types of rich people. So there's some rich people who do like you know by 24:41 very brand name clothes and buy a bunch of jewelry and do like and then there's the rich people who literally just it looks like they do not care yeah yeah. I saw I was in the I was in Lax couple weeks ago and I saw a homeless person inside Lax and I was like how did you get through security? That's crazy and then I realized that it's actually Ethan Hawk who's Ethan. He's an actor m so yeah it's like I think the level of rich that's like who says that who 25:11 Cuban, Cuban said, Mark Cuban says that he says, he says, got to earn the right to not have to care. Yeah. And so, so that level of confidence that Ike is giving off is that he's like, I don't care. Yeah. You know? And so I, I sits behind his desk and he's not taking any notes while Marty's talking. And so Marty, I like that when a server comes, they don't have to take notes to just, I'll remember that actually makes me super nervous. It makes me so nervous that I want to see my server, write it down. 25:39 But he says, tell me what's going on, man. What do you feel like you're, why do you feel like you're not enough? And so the initial sessions are twice a week for 45 minutes. Yeah. Right. Normal, maybe, you know, getting a session, yeah, yeah, yeah, Or kind of stuff. Right. And then I quickly begins to redefine Marty's internal narrative. And he's starting to, to read what Marty is saying and give language to it. But this is not a normal, healthy thing a psychiatrist would do. He starts to tell Marty things like your family didn't love you. 26:09 So this is, this is the 1985 middle class families worst fear about therapists. They're like, yes, he is someone who was doing what they were actually afraid of. Yes. That he's telling him like your family didn't love you. Like when they did that, that that wasn't love. They didn't love you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And they used you. Yeah. And he's saying things like you were emotionally abused. Yeah. And 26:34 you never actually made a decision for yourself, which do you know? Do you think was true and he was like coming to light with it? Or do think he was being abuse? I think there's elements of that that could be true. mean like, but it's all that's catastrophic language. You never made a decision for yourself. That stuff that I help like a normal good psychiatrist. Now a psychologist like a counselor would help you not like 27:01 would go, not all of your decisions have been somebody else's. But that's the stuff he started to say. And it's like, my parents loved me. Did they do an ideal upbringing, even when they made these decisions that were selfish for sure, but is their own selfishness and the things that they're dealing with mean that they don't love me? The answer is yes. But that's what a psychologist should help you de-catastro- 27:31 size catastrophize, catastrophize. That's what I couldn't figure out how to instead of ramping you up there, right? And that's what that's what Ike was doing. And so by the third week, Ike invites Marty to go on a walk after one of the sessions interesting. And so he says the fresh air is going to help him allowed 27:52 Okay, great areas. Nice. And that walk turns into lunch the next week and then the next week it's a movie and then a dinner and Ike starts these 45 minutes. It has great arms. These 45 minutes twice a week. So 90 minutes of therapy. Yeah. Slowly turn into six or seven hours per week. So these outings are 28:20 three hours, twice a week, four hours and it's he by paying the bill is yeah, Ike paying the bill. No Marty Marty is paying for these sessions. Marty's paying for six or seven hours of time and then is he also paying for the movie tickets and the dinner? Yes, so Ike is already yikes. He's kind of playing him. Yes, and these are turning from these are phone calls. These are office sessions. Obviously weekend walks help with errands. 28:50 And then like long late night conversations in Ike's apartment. he's coming over. this unique to Marty or does he have a lot of clients he's doing this with? um Does he have other clients? It doesn't seem like it at this point. that's lot of time. And so Ike tells him stuff like if we're going to rewire the way you see yourself, we can't just talk in circles in an office. Like this is your rehabilitation. We need total immersion. Right? And Marty trusts him completely. 29:17 He tells Phyllis this guy's changed my life. Because Marty does see some immediate, and here's what I think happens. Marty finally has somebody like anybody who is invested in caring about him. That's all he needed. Marty was lonely. Does Phyllis know? Well, he tells Phyllis that this guy's changed my life. And that's what I'm saying is that he does see some benefits because he has somebody, because just talking it out is helping. aah And so Phyllis, here's what's happening. She's a little skeptical. She's just kind of like, 29:47 you're spending more time with your shrink than you are at work or with your staff. And Marty says, no, no, no. says, it's okay, I got another job. You want to come try our sandwiches? It's the yellow belly. Marty says something that cues Phyllis off a little bit because he says he's like a big brother to me. And that was the first time that Phyllis was kind of like, that's a weird thing to say, right? And so Phyllis is starting to be a little more pressure on Marty and being like, hey, this is weird. This isn't normal. This is a lot of time with your counselor. And so Marty tells that to Ike. 30:17 and says, Phyllis keeps objecting to us spending time together. we should kill her. Well, he says to him, like, I guess, like, hey, you go for a walk. And Marty says, no, my sister actually plans something. She actually doesn't know if we should do that. And so Ike starts to say things like, your sister is resenting your success right now. Interesting. She's mad you're successful right now. She's losing control of you and that's making her upset. 30:44 He starts planting those kind of things. And so he encourages Marty to revisit childhood memories and then reframes them. so he's always, this is where he's not taking physical notes, but Ike is taking notes on the stories that Marty's giving him. Marty's telling him a story about Phyllis and then Ike will use this and say, don't you remember when she told on you? That wasn't protection. That was sabotage. She wasn't protecting you from the bad thing you were getting ready to do. She was sabotaging you from succeeding. 31:13 He's starting to reframe all those kind of myths. So he's starting to plant seeds to slowly draw Marty away from his sister, right? Which is the only family Maria has left, right? And so Marty, who has always seen Phyllis as his only ally, starts to doubt her intentions a little bit, right? Marty is doubting his sister's Marty is starting to be like, maybe I can write about this, right? And Ike pushes Marty, ultimately. much money is he spending? 31:40 I don't have an exact figure for this time frame because this is 1981 when they first started seeing each other. This process is slow. each other. When he first started seeing I know what you mean. And between 1982 and 1985 is when Ike, so for over three years, Ike is kind of slowly separating Marty from his sister. long con. Holy cow. Ultimately in 1985, Ike convinces Marty that he needs to disown his sister. 32:10 Not just personally. He needs to cut her out, because she is getting some money from the business, even though she's not an owner. um he, ah Marty writes a letter that is dictated by Ike. So Ike is saying, write this down. so he's like Paul in prison. Yes, I'm in prison and I got bit by a snake. 32:35 but he accuses her of manipulation, stealing money from their apparent estate and of emotional abuse. The letter is cold and it starts, it starts and ends. Sorry, it ends with I no longer consider you my sister. Loof. Yikes. And so Marty prints it out on Associated Fabric's letterhead and mails it certified. Phyllis is devastated. She tries to call me, but Marty won't answer the phone. That sucks. Yeah. 33:03 And what's tough is he doesn't open up an opportunity for her to have a conversation. He's just like, this is it. Well, that's pretty big red flag. I do think like, dude, there's so many people on the Internet who complain right now. We're like, oh, I'm getting cut off from my family. But in some cases, sure, that's unhealthy. Not the right thing to do. Most times that happens, it's usually not out of nowhere. And it's usually someone saying, here's the reason that I'm going to do this. Usually there's been 33:33 some conversations before then and like here's the expectation is respected. Here's what I'm willing to be treated with. Here's what I'm not going to be treated like those kind of things. This is not that this is kind of like for Phyllis. This is Marty choosing Ike over her. Yeah, I mean has she has there been conversations or is this out of the blues? Is the first time she's well she's been trying to tell him that Ike is a red flag. Yeah, you know so but she's not relenting on the pressure and I think that's where but Ike gets 34:01 he tells Marty to not just figuratively cut her out of life. Yeah, he needs to go through as many pictures as he can find and cut her out of these pictures shoot and uh put that picture of their house back up picture of the house. Yeah, I actually have a different. I actually have a good picture. This is uh yes. What this is the right one. There we go. This is their house. This is the Hamptons house. This isn't their house when they're yeah. This is the house he buys later. Okay, okay, okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. What did you want to see about it? 34:31 Well, was going to ask you about that other picture with the people in it that aren't in it anymore in the picture, the same picture that the people, oh, did I actually click that one? Yeah, did they, did they, did he, did he cut them out of it? That was, that's, that's a later picture. Okay, this is later. um This is, this is during this time. This is a picture of uh Marty here on the right and Dr Ike on the left shirtless. 34:53 first. In some reason, okay, I'm going to be honest. You the chest hair of Ike, huh, like dude, Ike is friggin. I love his chest hair. I've got a view. Wow, I do doctor, right? I do. What are you a police officer? Because you're hot. I do have a few hands up. Don't shoot. Oh no, a few things to say of this picture. Great point number one. If you look at this picture, 35:19 he his arms are so much less hairy than they were in the other picture. I don't know what happened, but they're not very in the picture yeah, you could I also think look at his chest here is kind of wet a little bit like I think he's been in the well he's been in the pool. I think yeah, maybe more that arm here probably true, but this green polo. can't say for sure is if you look at his sleeves yeah, his got the same tan line like he's wearing a polish in that long pole. I do still respect that also, but this green polo that Marty's wearing in this hat 35:48 like this. He looks like a groundskeeper he does, and this is the stuff that he would wear around the house. You know, care of the house and this is did he dress like that before? Is this something that I know yeah, like you should look like a groundskeeper. I think this would be better if you started to look like a janitor. No, you know, it's just this sense of style. This is just him and I don't know what year this photo is, but this is this is this looks to be probably eighties like maybe mid eighties around the time that Phyllis is getting cut out yeah. 36:15 I would probably would guess nineties, but I could see eighties, maybe nineties. He does. I does very much look like that you're staying the night at your friend's house and you walk into the kitchen in the middle of the dad's just like ads in their drink beer and he's like oh sorry that you guys were asleep and they like grabs a shirt that's nearby and puts it on real quick and and then he's like he's like I'm gonna have to how often this happened to you. I knew a lot of your friends dad was just like oh sorry, oh sorry. 36:43 and you were like that's what peak masculinity looks like a friend. I need to if I can't grow my arm hair, I'm going to tattoo it on. I had a friend look at his back here. You can literally kind of see above his shoulder. It's going roll up there a little bit. No, I had a friend. had a friend growing up. uh His parents were were they were doing fine and uh and by like I don't mean like their relationship was doing fine. I mean the relationship they're fine. They're financially more than fine. 37:09 He was a smoker. He wasn't allowed to smoke in the house. He smoked in the garage. And I remember very clearly they kept all of their like beverages in the garage fridge. And I remember being over there. It was like the second or third time that I went to their house. And I remember going out there and grabbing a drink and walking past him while he's smoking uh and walk back, walking back in the house, only talked to him like once or twice in my life. And he's sitting there. I will never forget this moment. This is a great moment in my life. 37:39 and he says smug as old sitting on the garage stairs. He sees me. I'm probably a fourth grade. He says so Tim, huh? I'm like yeah and he's like that's enough an awesome name great moment for me. It's an awesome rate moment for me and I said thanks and I went inside and then later you find out it was Tim and he's like I was like tip right. 38:07 I don't like that name. I don't like that name anymore. name. 38:14 He didn't have very much hair on his arms, though I will say that for sure. Maybe that's why I think smoking is cool because of that because of that moment. Another adult is this what I'm saying is that it is important for young men to have other adult men who speak into them who respect and like doesn't matter how much your dad is like Tim T. I'm proud of you. I love you yeah having it. You remember a moment where another guy other yeah and that's what I can't wait to steer your child off a cliff. 38:44 you know, I be like hey, you know what's cool robbing your family and moving to Mexico. Hey, that's really cool. That's really cool. uh 39:05 The way you're doing that seems like you've never done this before. 39:15 Hey, join us on Patreon. If you want this to be ad free and also the we there's tons of other perks you get to all episodes are ad free. You get next week's episode right now and you get to do monthly hangouts with me and Tim like we really look. It's like a virtual just hang out room and we play games together. We talk. We have show and tell sometimes we've made a lot of good friends through this and so it's a really good time to do that. So either way, please share the episode. Tell somebody about it. These are all those ways to help us grow the show because we love doing it. We want to keep doing it. So thanks for being here. 39:49 Okay, so anyway, so he cuts phyllis out and I actually got the you're wrong. This is is 1982. This is like a year into his counseling. Oh shoot, that's because phyllis out okay, dang um and so in and he's and actually marty starts telling his co workers because they're kind of like hey phyllis, what is he? He the fabric place. Yes, the fire place. He kind of starts. Let me understand here. Is this a small town fabric shop or is this like new? They work well. Yeah, I know it's new york, but like is it local only or do they work with like the nation? 40:18 not what the they ship around. It's a big. It's a big. It's a big business. They're making enough money. This isn't just like they walk into the store and they're like I need some fabrics. This is like this is like a big business. have more ring ring. I need a bunch of fat. Yes, there it's a very big business and and he starts telling his coworkers and his fan other family members that Phyllis has serious psychological issues and that his therapist suggested a total boundary and there's no one who's like oh yeah, Ike is behind this. You know 40:46 and so everybody else who knows her is like I can see it. Maybe you know, I don't know okay, okay, and so but it's also one those things where it's like the more she fights. It's it's you know, how do you yeah and especially to like you're in that situation. I'm sure it's maddening, especially if you're getting cut out. Financially, your only sibling, like your parents both died. It probably does drive two years a little crazy like you probably do kind of out a little bit. You're being gaslit and all of a sudden you're kind of like you kind of come across as crazy. Yeah, yeah, you know 41:14 um and so so that's a that's eighty two. Ike starts um showing up to associated fabrics meetings just to observe how Marty's behaving at work. You know and he kind of pitches it like well you know you can tell me how you are work, but I kind of want to I want to want to observe you at your job yeah and at first he's just he's just kind of in the background, which would be super weird. 41:39 if your counselor just sat in this chair. It was like you talking about general time. You tell me how mean Jaron is to you during the podcast, but I kind of wanted to see it. Well, you can watch it on YouTube. No, you know I need to see it. I need to say, and so like if he was just chilling, yeah, she was your counselor. She oh there you go. 41:59 Ah. 42:02 mommy issues. Oh, I just need another woman in my life to help me, help me guide myself. The writers, you know who doesn't need counseling alpha men, but it would be weird. Yeah, so now I just in the corner at the meetings yeah and he's you know and he's doing this for several weeks and then eventually he's kind of like going like hey, I've got a thought like on sale strategy. Something that's not about is Ike is kind of 42:31 piping up during some of these meetings and and going like well, what do we like? What if we did this on customer retention or like leadership stuff and everybody's just like let him talk, yes, I'm not going to lie. Even my boss's therapist is in the room in a meeting and my boss's therapist says something. My response is not talk. My response is shut up shrink like I do that every time he talks guarantee you go shut up shrink every single time because what hilarious 42:57 suit disrespectful also hilarious, but if he's only been if he but I forgot his arms. Never mind, I'm the you're taking account how hairy this guy's arms are this guy is like I I everything I say I'm like hey, let me put the same the polo falls down as I see too big. He's wearing a long sleep on may Mith arm. m 43:23 let me lost my teeth with that hairy arm baby. Oh yeah, I got Alex to go, so that counts, but I mean it's kind of like it's like, but this has been several weeks he's been there. It's not like day one he's like I got a thought he's been there for always and he's also not standing up like the moment the intern finally finds their voice, but he's also not he's also not being like what do know he's not like 43:51 oh he's not standing in front of the room being like we should do this. You guys should do this. Yeah, just going like they're kind of talking amongst the teams like does anybody have any ideas and then I can the back goes well. What if you guys did this outside observer can you remember I guess a lot of charisma I guess very nice lot of degrees you know because he can just be like hey you know this is not my place but I just got a thought yeah. What if you guys did this and you can take it or leave it. I don't work here but look what and that if someone did that you'd be a shut up shrink. Is that what you're saying 44:20 I mean, it depends if I could see those things in meetings for several weeks. Yeah, I mean, it depends on this. I guess it depends on the person like it depends on how the thing like there's I think there's a lot of variables to what's going on. I think my gut reaction probably is to shut up shrink, but show me those arms. Maybe I'll let you show me those arms. That sounds like an HR violation, but so then Marty in an Ike Ike's in the office with Marty. 44:49 And so now he's observed a lot of the work relationships. So he's starting to give a lot of feedback on the specific work relationships. everybody? Yeah. So Marty is writing internal memos and, you know, proposals for this kind of stuff. And so he's starting to help him rewrite those. And I said, well, here's what you should say. Here's how you could say that better. I think if you say that you come across as insecure. if you said this... his like little chat GPT. Kind of. 45:19 and his own is a little pocket paper clip to be like. Can I help? Can I help out here, but he even starts like your sister hates you. You should set up boundary so I could stop for clippy. It seems like you should get your sister out of your life. Do you want to right click cut on Phyllis move to trash to track? So but he's so now Ike is writing some of these proposals 45:47 on behalf of him because he sees it stressing him out and this is what I'm saying is that this is I for you. That is Ike's motive. Okay, Ike's or his is M. O. Is it he goes his mode of operation? If you let's go to a movie, I'll write this for you. I'll write this for you. He even starts reprimanding employees on Marty's behalf. See, that's the moment I say shut up shrink for sure right. See your therapist starts reprimanding me. I reprimand him, but then he can just fire you, not the shrink 46:17 the shrink has no power, but doesn't he? I mean it does seem like he's gaining some power and a lot of influence, which is power, but because that shrink for as long as I can well, a couple of people stood up and when they went to Marty and they said hey, this guy doesn't have any authority here. Yeah, he don't see they said work. They said and I quote shut up shrink uh 46:43 so I says that person is challenging your authority yeah there because they're because they don't know that I wrote this memo. They're responding to you that way yeah they're challenging your authority you and Marty says no he's worked here for a long time. He says you should fire him or your week and Marty fires. Yeah you call you call a man weak. You know 47:03 And Marty's sitting on the mouse every night going home, putting Rogaine on his arms, trying to get those hairy arms, right? He's actually taking fabric home from the fabric store and pulling little fibers off of it and gluing it to his arms. 47:17 Yeah. So, Ike eventually, because he's doing all this business stuff, convinces Marty to introduce him as when, because like, it's weird if you go meet new clients or clients who've bought fabrics before and your counselor's there. Yeah, this is just my therapist. Right. So Ike says, Ike says that's awkward and weird. Honestly, honestly, bro, can we start doing that? This is my therapist. our business meetings? my therapist. Sorry, he's just here this is my therapist. He's just here to observe. 47:51 Well, so he tells him that's awkward. Just Sam, I'm your business partner. So he starts introducing me as a business partner. And so Ike on his own starts attending trade shows and using by himself and he's using Marty's name to build credibility in this business circle because he's like, oh, I'm a strategic arm of the company. So that's what I'm saying. I'm trying to paint a picture like this is what Ike does. He's very good at that kind of stuff. And so ah Marty starts to sound like 48:21 like have we ever seen anybody who starts to idolize somebody so much that they take on their mannerisms and they start to sound like them. That's what's starting to happen, do and speak and say things they're same way. Yes, yes, yes, like they just do have a start to their wives can't really tell them apart. They say they just start to idolize them to the point where they start to they start to talk like the way that they talk and you know, I'm saying 48:49 Yeah, and it's just like why are you, why are you batting in this chair? Well, this is what my hero does. Just like at work, he started to say like I'm not going to engage with sabotage today or like you know, at lunch with coworkers like I'm redefining the ecosystem of my you heard somebody who's like you know, just saying stupid 49:12 stuff, right? Yeah, good for you for finding your truth or whatever, but shut up. He starts to introduce Ike to his friends as this is Ike, my therapist, my business consultant and my best friend all rolled into one. And so Marty's fully bought in to Ike's thing, right? Now every major life decision that Marty is making runs through Ike. Not just business stuff. This is whether or not to attend a family wedding, because Phil's might be there. 49:42 Oh right, or what color to paint his office, which brand of wine to serve at a client dinner like every decision is running through Ike at this point and so Marty begins to just standing here trimming his hedges, telling Joe all of this. Is this where we're at right now in the story? 49:59 Yes, okay, he's telling Joe I'm trying to picture like he's like he's like yeah and then so then I'm sorry he's I'm running all my decision. They could have made a movie where it's like almost like a forest gump where he's like just telling it just cuts back to him being like was. This is a quote from him. He says sometimes I'll say something. This is what he started to tell his friends because he couldn't because Marty's brain he's he's struggling to identify his own desires and his thoughts apart from Ikes, okay, because it's so invasive. 50:25 that he says. Sometimes I'll say something and I realize I don't know if it's my thought or Ike's and so but that could just cut to him being the yeah. Yeah, sometimes I can't even tell my own thoughts apart from Ike's and then Joe's just standing there in his backyard like I didn't and like and he's Joe's in this pad and he's like I'm actually going to take notes on everything you're saying right now because I'm going to write something about this because this is crazy. How do you accidentally stumble into this right? That's crazy and we're still this is still only this is only the first two years still this is 50:55 very early in, right? And so um Ike reinforces it by being like, oh my gosh, yeah, so your thoughts are realigned. Like you're finally becoming the man you always wanted to be, right? And so Marty begins um taking on administrative tasks for Ike. And Ike frames this as, if you can't do the administrative acts for yourself, maybe you can do them for me and that will build your confidence. Like you're part of something, right? And so he starts organizing his appointments and 51:25 tying up notes from his lectures and mailing, mailing letters to publishers and potential clients, you know, patients. And I keep saying, helping me helps you. You're learning agents. Yeah. Right. This, this feels like 51:43 I've tried not to name names here, but this feels like I don't know James River Leadership College, maybe well, because like and that's because because Marty's just doing this busy work and like Ike is writing a book and writing a book by hand by the way, which is a psycho behavior thing to do that is absolutely so he's writing in the eighties, not before people didn't they you know anyway, so he's writing this book and so then Marty's taking his handwritten notes and then he's typing them, you know, 52:12 And Marty's grateful for this stuff, because Marty thinks this is helping. But that's exactly what Marty's just like, I'll get to clean toilets for the Lord. I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm getting to I'm getting my leadership degree. And I get to pay to do it. Anyway, it's accredited through Evangel. But I mean, he ends up spending more time working directly for Ike than he does for his own company. 52:39 And Ike continues to push this narrative in Marty's head. And so in 1984, Ike begins to float this idea in some therapy sessions that Marty needs to be giving himself to something bigger. He needs to be building his legacy, right? Marty actually, part of the reason Marty's overwhelmed is that Marty has more money than he needs. ah Which is a crazy thing to say, but he says you've never... 53:07 you've done anything truly meaningful with it. You know now that I think about it. If you're watching this, I think you have more money than you need and you should report us. You should report us on page. You have too much money and you I love so much. I don't care about the joke. I was making any more. You should report us on page. You should report us on patron. Get us banned 53:36 Don't do that. We could not pay for this place if you do that. mean, Marty has enough money that he could do the monster truck tier. Because again, the fabrics business is really successful. But here's the thing about the fabrics business is that his parents built it. Yeah, wasn't him. Yeah, that's hard for your confidence. You are living on your parents' value. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, So that's daddy's BMW, not yours. Isaac. Isaac. 54:07 Ike says you should start the Yaren foundation Yaren Hebrew word that means to sing with joy. I thought when you did this, you were trying to point to a logo you were put on screen and I sat there for a really long time being like, is he going to put that? No, it's the Aaron foundation. Okay, okay, sing with joy. Okay, it's my name. 54:33 Okay, okay, okay, is spelled, Jer, spelled with a Y, but it's the that where jaren comes from yeah, interesting. I never guess that so it's Y A R O N and that's what my name means to sing with joy. So fun times, so he convinces him to the year in foundation and the Aaron Foundation is a way for Marty to heal from his emotional trauma. He's going to transform his grief into philanthropy and 55:01 Bonus, Ike is going to go in with him. So it's not just Marty starting this. Ike wants to be part of this foundation. He wants to be the director of the foundation. So he is the co-founder and executive advisor of the Yaron Foundation. Dr. Ike is. Marty puts in $165,000 and Ike contributes $5,000. Fair. Which Ike insures is equal. That does sound equal to me too. 55:28 Ike says, that's the same percentage of my income as it is yours. Oh, that's fair. That's a good point. So that's how Ike... partners? That's how he sets it up, yes. Oh, They are doing this foundation together. in almost immediately... And you keep saying foundation. Is this a charity? This is a charity, and it's used the way that all charities are, which is to boost Ike's reputation. company! 55:57 I mean in a way yes, okay, because so they're starting to host events that are under the Yaron Foundation name, but it's really just a way of getting rich people to give to the foundation, but it's getting rich people to be in an event where Mike starts taking pictures with or Ike. Sorry, Ike Mike. I did it again. Ike starts taking pictures because Ike loves being important. Yeah, right. Me too. He likes being around. So here's Ike with Gwyneth Paltrow. 56:26 I oh my God, I can't even recognize her there right right, but he likes to brush shoulders with celebrities and here's another one. I don't remember who this is, but maybe you'll know who this celebrity is just two dudes who are not problematic at all. It's OJ Simpson for listeners glasses. 56:48 dude. I are you in love with her? I encourage coffee because every every picture I put of I come here. It's something else. The first picture it's like I love his arms and then it's like he's sure listen. You're like oh man, like he's got that tan line, so he does a polo. He looks confident here and then it's like dude. Look at his glasses. He just seems like you think I curse cop is hot. What is your deal dude? 57:19 Do you want to kiss I curse God? All I'm gonna say is if you're listening, you should watch this episode. 57:30 you guys don't understand how I see how Marty fell for look at his eyes. He's so dreamy m 57:39 I mean, but for real, those are cool glasses. Oh my gosh dog. So anyway, I uses this is a way to tell you his public image and and and I would too though yeah, but this is this is Ike's way of you know, kind of mudding the finances a little bit right. Okay, Ike begins asking things about Marty's bank accounts. He's saying so if something were to happen to you, 58:07 Who would manage these assets? have a phyllis anymore. Straight up. He's like, who do you trust that would... goes, don't even have a will, do you? family, you don't have kids. Marty, it's reckless that you don't have a will. That is a little reckless. We should make you a will. You know, it is kind of reckless that you don't have a will. Now that I think about it, you sing with joy and stuff and all, and that's great, but like, I mean, if you think about it, it's kind of reckless. Like, what are you going to do? Give it to Reagan? My wife? 58:37 Oh no, you're right. No, so Ike convinces Marty. Okay. Marty has a Swiss bank account for some reason. Okay. That Ike is a cosigner on this account. Wait, he has a Swiss bank account? Yeah, with hundreds of thousands of dollars in it. Yeah. Yeah. But I mean, here's the thing. I think Marty had some financial planners. Marty, Marty, know, Marty's parents set him up well. Like he's got other bank accounts. He's got, uh can you me a picture of Marty again? Yep. 59:07 ah this is Marty. This is them together. This is Marty at the time this is happening and Marty wasn't allowed to be involved in the business when he was a kid. He was kind of involved. Do you think Marty was doing crime? No, I think his parents. Here's what I think. You want to know what I think? Sure, I think that New York, well, what would have been like forties, fifties, sixties. I think that certain people potentially angry Italians 59:36 showed up to Marty's parents and said I need a large piece of fabric that won't leak. You why is everything this? Why is everything like it's the mafia? I think the mafia we want to get to wrapped up bodies. I don't need you giving more ammo for people to come after you. Okay, you're right. I okay fine kind hearted, wonderful people, the Italians angry 01:00:04 But so what I'm saying is like he's a co-signer on his bank accounts now. Yeah. Including a bank account that has hundreds of thousands of dollars that is like an offshore account. Like he's got, he's got different investments, different places. Now Ike is a co-signer on all of these accounts. He has named him as the executive of his estate and his last will and testament. Like, he gave him the power of attorney. So if something happens to Marty, Ike is now the one who makes these decisions. Right? That's crazy. And this is all within a couple of years of this happens. 01:00:34 Like it doesn't take long for him to do this. know, Ike has near total financial control and he can access Marty's money. He can make legal decisions on his behalf. He can override family members if it came down to that. Right. And Marty Marty believes that this is a safeguard. Marty actually one of his friends was like, hey man, this is a little sketchy. And Marty goes, no, no, no, I trust Ike more than anyone because he knows me better than I know myself. Right. 01:01:01 I'm still a stressed right now. Here's some rumors about this yeah. She does and she's deeply alarm. She sends a letter asking Marty to reconsider having him on his and I think intercepts the letter of course he does and tells Marty. Your sister wrote you a letter yeah and I don't think you should read it. How did he intercept the letter because it is he's involved and he's probably checking Marty's mail every day day. That's a federal offense. 01:01:31 Oh yeah, opposed to everything else that oh whoa, whoa, he's looking at his his mail. That's crossing the line, but he tells, he tells Marty, your sister just wants the money. You're doing the right thing by keeping distance. Right. And so Mar Marty at this point is fully enmeshed in Ike's world. Right. And 01:01:55 Ike starts calling Marty odd hours, with hour and hours of the night with work requests. Like, hey, I had an idea for a book chapter, can you come over and type it before I forget? Kind of stuff. It's almost like when you keep people exhausted, you know? And it forms a bonding chemical in you that's like, oh my gosh. Isn't it crazy that your baby's just Stockholm syndrome? But for the next few years, Marty types over a dozen manuscripts for Ike, over like mental health, self-health guides, memoirs. 01:02:23 a fictional novel about a revolutionary therapist that closely mirrors Ike. Wait, we revolutionary like the revolutionary war. No uh yeah, I is like let's write a like I was right a fiction piece about a therapist during the revolutionary war. That's great. Don't worry George. I'll make you feel better about this. 01:02:46 Hey, if you love the show, a great way to serve support is by getting some merch. We got lots of great stuff. I'm going to showcase some of it right now. This is like our little tilling QVC. You can get a it's not a call. It's a podcast sweatshirt. Very sweet. The nice thing about this is no one knows what podcast you're talking about. So you wear it in public and you can tell them about your lord and savior to a podcast. We also got the this is one of my favorite things we've ever made. The fiddle off fest hoodie. It's got uh the devil. 01:03:15 playing a fiddle. It's not really the devil's a skeleton. And then all of the bands on the back of it like it's a festival. But spoiler alert, these aren't bands. These are jokes from episodes. So worth checking out. And this is one of my favorite things we've ever done. This is for the real fans. This is an old one. We've got a Tim Stones get well quick trick shirt. And it's very cool. We've got some really good designs. Darren is good at designing stuff. So support his dream. No one will hire him as a designer, but you can by buying his merch. 01:03:43 It's our merch, but it's his designs. so leave a comment, say, Jared, you're good at this. um We like your art. He really needs it. He needs your support so bad. Please make him feel better about it and buy some merch. It helps make this show keep happening. You can tell people about how much you love this show with it. So. 01:04:07 Did you hear it? Did you hear what I said? Yeah, you're to do a two minute merch ad. wasn't a two minute merch ad. Oh, Jaren's a good designer. Give him a high five. Make him feel good about his art. 01:04:21 and then you're going to make them listen to two minutes of ads. We got to do all that and then it's going to be like back to school this fall like 01:04:31 I don't want to be. I hate skippable ads. They're not skip. They are skippable. Yeah, you too. Bring you leave all this in that 01:04:45 And anyway, so Marty's doing a lot for Ike and he starts introducing him not as a therapist, but he's my partner in my emotional recovery. Marty is introducing Ike. Ike as that, when he's a partner in emotional recovery. His self-identity is now so merged with Ike's world view that he no longer, he doesn't make any big decisions. He really did, like Ike put out the prophecy of you don't make any decisions for yourself. And... 01:05:13 It's almost like when someone tells you, like, hey, here's the problem, you just trust that they're not going to become that same problem. Right? So in 1986, this has only been five years, Marty mentions to Ike that he's thinking of buying a vacation property, you know? And it's the first independent decision he's kind of floated in a while. And Ike hears this and goes, you do need a place that's yours, somewhere to escape the ghosts, all this stuff. So Ike encouraged him. 01:05:43 to look in the Hamptons yeah, because I I've actually been watching this reality show. He goes, I know, man, I've seen that party house that's in and I goes no, no, no, no, like I think you should and I and Marty's like a little hesitant a little bit. He's like oh, it's pricey, it's expensive, but I goes no, no, no, no, you deserve it. This is part of your healing right. So Marty buys a modest house with that large backyard that we see now, right, modest to me. Well, in the Hamptons, this is I mean, this is pretty modest, but you know 01:06:12 I mean you can see the whole house in this picture like that's kind of a go. You know it's a do we know where it is? Can I look it up on Zilla? I'm sure we can find this afterward. We got we got enough to get to right here. We got to get some of those. So Marty buys it. Yeah and ah this is Marty's sanctuary is what it's kind of positioned as and Ike says it's a container for growth a place to redefine your past that's whispering at you and within a month of closing Ike starts 01:06:42 decorating the house without asking because he starts putting his own diplomas in the hallway. Nice. ah He replaces Marty's Marty's art with family photos of the Hirschkopf's and one notable thing is that he moves this giant cow statue. Let's see if I can find a picture of this actually a giant cow statue ah into the backyard because it gives ah it gives fun way it gives 01:07:12 like personality it gives. I can't find it's like there's when whenever I go to Saint Louis, there's this hotel. I always stay at and the hotel has a rooftop pool at the rooftop pool. It overlooks the city, uh beautiful city. It's not oh but overlooking the city is the rooftop pool and is really weird statue of a hippo. 01:07:36 and it doesn't fit the hotel vibe at all. It doesn't fit the pool vibe at all. Yeah, it's just this really big, really weird hippo. Is it like that? Kind of I got a picture of I don't have a picture of it's like it's like I'm fun. I'm quirky. You know, is that what that is? It doesn't or is it or is it like this cow was made by a Byzantine artist? Yeah, something like that. Okay, like it's more of like here. Let me show you picture. Okay, so it's 01:08:06 this is is this exactly what you were describing? No, not at all, because this is they had these cows all over Kansas City. My wife yeah has about sixty pictures because her mom was obsessed with it yeah, and so they used to take pictures when they were kids with these cows all over Kansas City. They had them all over the place and it's got to be the same artist. So this is yeah. This was Ike one of one of these put in the backyard. You know it doesn't it was look similar to this something of this vibe. It looks bad is what it looks like. I'm going to be honest with you, so that's that's you know Ike 01:08:35 put his own personal touches on this house pretty quick is what I'm yeah yikes and honest. If you got someone who's trying to put their personal touches on your house and they buy that and they put in the backyard, you should personal touch them out of your life well. So by the late eighties, so they buy this house eighty six by the late eighties, the summer parties are pretty regular right there, having this lavish parties guests are local philanthropists because the foundation high society new yorkers at least 01:09:01 one appearance from Glen of outro and her family. You know, we want from OJ and the mailbox changed to read what Ike wanted his author name to be, which was Doctor Isaac Stevens, a fake last name that he asked socially so that way no one knew that the fraud he was doing right and Marty is Marty going to these parties. Is he a party boy? Marty is again he's serving guests of these parties. Ike is introducing Marty at these parties as his cousin, 01:09:30 his assistant or his house manager. When people are like, who's that guy over there? He's like, oh, he's my house manager. Because all these people think this is Ike's house. Yeah. Because Ike's putting out the invite, right? And he's framing this to Marty as like, hey, you know, you're overwhelmed. don't want to be the owner. You don't want people to think you own this. Marty's wearing that green button up and he is grilling for the guests. He's cleaning up the lawn afterward. And a guest asked Marty, like, do you live here? He froze. And Marty said that he's just helping out. 01:09:59 and Ike cuts in and goes, he's a real mensch, he's just helping out. Marty begins to disappear into the role of a servant, not host, on his own property. And so anytime Marty expresses interest in friendships or dating even, Ike shuts that down. Ike goes, no, she's after your money, she reminds you of your mother, you're not ready. Keep him isolated. uh One woman Marty dates for a few months is forced to sign a non-disclosure agreement. 01:10:28 that Ike drafted himself. So it's not a real, probably just something that's like I won't tell people or whatever was in the beginning of the relationship or like they broke up it off and then it was like hey, by the way, you need to send this NDA Ike. There was one woman that Marty tried to date that Ike set up a meeting of just those two so he could interview her to tell Marty if it was safe or not and then tell Marty she's not emotionally safe for you. That's such a giant red flag like and then you Marty not sign that paper and not show up to the date. 01:10:58 if that happened, that is an unbelievably. I cannot believe she showed up good night. So in the early two thousands, this is this has been going on for almost two twenty years now right. Okay, over twenty years now yeah. I can courage as Marty to invest in a firm called Bennett funding group yeah, so we Joe talking to Isaac. What's that twenty ten or Marty? Okay, we're almost to the we're almost caught up 01:11:25 He's cutting the hedges and he's like, yeah, and then he had them sign the NDA and yeah. Well, I mean like I guess just cutting off any, any potential threat to his grip, right? Yeah. So Marty invests $1.5 million into the Bennett funding group, right? Yeah. Is that like a large portion of his money or is that? It's a pretty big thing, right? ah But it turns out to be a Ponzi scheme. Nice. And so uh Marty loses all of that money. 01:11:54 course he does, yeah. And he tells Ike that he's panicking, but Ike is like, it's just money, you still have me, you'll be fine, you'll be fine. oh Oh no. And around that same time, Associated Fabrics is failing, Marty's savings are depleted, now he's starting to run out of He's running the company. He's also paying Ike for all these sessions still. For 20 years, Ike has been living off of Marty's life. And he's continuing to pay the property taxes and the upkeep on the Hamptons house, which he barely uses himself, because Ike and his family now, 01:12:24 live there. Full time? right, that's one of their... Is Ike married now? Ike has got two kids. Ugh. um But now, if we're looking at the whole thing, Marty has lost his sister, any romantic prospects, his wealth, control of his home, and he spends hours each week doing unpaid work for Ike. Yeah. Right? Yeah. And in his journal, Marty wrote, I am a character in someone else's story. Yeah, you are. Yeah. Yeah. 01:12:54 So by 2007, Marty is now in his sixties and is after twenty six years of control. Ike has become more erratic, short tempered, domineering. The dynamic has shifted from passive manipulation to overt control. Marty is living in the guest room in his own Hampton's house, right, because he doesn't want to live in the house because I could drop by any time or host parties. Yeah. And so he's still attending therapy multiple times a week. 01:13:23 and completing these errands and doing all this stuff for I and he says 26 years. just feel like my therapist might be abusing me. So there's Mike or Mike goodness. You can call him Mike. They're a player. Marty wants to buy a flat screen TV and Ike shoots it down because you don't need that. It's wasteful. That's not what this house is about. It's true. Yeah, that's true. And yeah, because if you buy a with the cost of a TV, you could buy a home. So then Marty goes upstairs. 01:13:53 and realizes that Ike had already had a new one delivered to the master bedroom for himself, a flat screen TV. And this is one moment where- he crack? Does he crack? Does he kill him? For the first time in years, Marty goes, I'm the one paying for everything. Why don't I have a say in this house? There was just a little bit like a, okay. So Marty begins making some small decisions. He buys a new recliner for his New York City apartment. Something that Ike was like, ah, that's- That's the symbol of success. 01:14:22 That's you're going to become lazier be sitting in the chair. You don't have time. You're even at your apartment. You know, he reconnects with a former colleague from that used to work at the fabric for coffee without telling Ike. That's how do, but that's how controlling it was is that this one thing of like, what if I meet up with somebody I used to know for coffee and not tell him? Yeah, that's a little rebellious. Yeah. And he listens to an old voicemail from Phyllis who has not talked to now for twenty seven years. 01:14:51 has not talked to his own sister for 27 years. And Marty Journals, he writes this, he says, what if I've been wrong? I miss my sister. And who am I without him? So in early 2010, Marty's diagnosed with a hernia and he's got to get surgery. This is the breaking point. It's it's minor, you'll be fine. Like just keep me posted, right? So Marty goes in for surgery alone. After when he's recovering in his New York City apartment. 01:15:20 There's no visit, there's no flowers, there's no call, there's no food waiting for him when he gets home. And he's sitting there on this bed recovering from this, I mean, albeit minor surgery. But he's sitting here, if I died on that table, he would have gotten everything. And he wouldn't even call to see if I'm okay afterward. And that was the moment for him where he really started to break. And a couple of months later, this is where he flips. Because Marty, 01:15:51 loses it one night and so hold on. I'm trying to keep track. Is this after that moment where John him are talking and he's cutting the hedges now? Are we passed? No, we're not passed that yet. Okay, so he's still like yeah, and then I stabbed him with the hedge trimmers. No, we're not past that yet. Okay, okay, okay. So this is Marty snaps after this and one night drives out to the Hamptons property, doesn't tell Iquerys going, just drives out to the Hamptons property, goes to the backyard, 01:16:19 digs a gigantic hole in the backyard and kicks that painted cow into the hole in the back and berries this cow. Oh my gosh, I love that and does he tell Ike or does Ike just show up and be like where's the cow? He's like I don't know man. I think no still the cow he buries this cow and in and 01:16:42 he'll say this now. It took him hours like he is dry. believe closer, but he says it was it was exhausting, but it was emotionally cleansing. It was he buried it and one week later, Marty Marty drafts a formal letter to Ike okay, and it reads like one of Ike's own therapy, and he had Ike right help him write it. Yeah, he helped me break up with my there. 01:17:07 It's not you. It's not you. There's another therapist that's got a who's been controlling my life. And it's like, hmm, strange. says, he says in the letter that he's cutting off contact that he that he's revoking Ike's power of attorney. He's removed him from the will and he's terminating him as the executive as a state. Yeah. And the letter ends with this relationship has not been therapeutic. It's been exploitative. Yeah. And Marty mails it and Ike never responds. 01:17:35 So after mailing the letter, Marty reaches out, just calls Phyllis' number. He doesn't even know if it's going to be the same number. He hasn't talked to his sister in almost 30 years. This guy hasn't talked to his sister. 30 years. She answers and he says, I'm sorry, I think I've been in a cult. And that starts the reconciliation. They talked for six hours, they cry, they argue, and Marty starts to show her the journals and the financial records and the photo albums of the parties where he was a butler at his own home. 01:18:05 and she says, we'll fix this. So ah now we're to the point where Phyllis is starting to do the background work of taking these journals and financial records and trying to put this whole thing together. Marty is now at the Hamptons house kind of cleaning stuff up, removing all of Ike's things, and then he runs into the neighbor. And now Marty is... 01:18:27 So Joe is there watching these parties and he's like, this guy throws crazy parties. And he's like, and that butler is cool. And he's like, I'm going to go talk to the butler. Little but known to him is the whole time he's been watching these parties, this story is now cracking. Like this relationship is falling apart in front of his eyes. And he just happens to have the conversation with him like right after this all So talks to the random gardener and the gardener says, my therapist has been controlling my life for almost 30 years. 01:18:54 This is not his house, this is mine. And Joe, as a reporter, is like, say more stuff. He says there's a body buried in the backyard. Oh, I buried a body. ah So Joe starts asking him all these questions. Of course, yeah. And Joe actually starts with the process of helping put together all of these paperwork and all of this stuff. Marty shows him the breakup letter. 01:19:23 Joe stunned, of learns about all this kind of stuff and starts Joe starts seeking out other patients of Dr. I because Marty is not that's been the question the whole time is like theoretically he's doing this with more people, but at the same time he's investing so much time in this. It's like does he how could he have any other clients? Well, there was a widow who says that Ike pushed her to disown her own children. There's a man who was convinced to leave his business to Ike and his will. 01:19:53 uh A family that said their son was encouraged to alienate siblings over therapy breakthroughs. And he uncovers this whole pattern of manipulation through Ike's entire career. This is what he's done to several people. I don't have a full count, but he's done this to more than 10 people, right? Yikes. And uh all under the guise of radical emotional honesty and therapeutic boundaries. And he's just gaining all of this stuff. So Joe contacts the New York Department of Health. 01:20:21 and he learns that complaints require direct patient action. like he can't file a complaint on behalf of Marty. Marty has to be the one who goes and does this. He also learns there's no current complaints that are open on Dr. I Kershkov. And so many of, because all the victims are afraid to speak. mean, like this guy has, it's also embarrassing. It's also really embarrassing to be like, Hey, by the way, I let this guy manipulate me for 30 years. You know? And so in 2012 with Phyllis's help, 01:20:48 Marty gathers all the materials and files a formal complaint with the New York State Department of Health's Office of Professional Medical Conduct, which is a lot to say. Yeah, that's big. But he includes his journals, the financial records, the power of attorney forms, proof of Ike signatures on checks. He's got photos from the parties. He's got statements from friends and former employees. And so this is a multi-year investigation that's now going on with OPMC, right? They're working on this investigation. While that investigation has been happening over, know, this whole like... 01:21:17 In 2019, Joe, the reporter, he releases the article about this. And I forget what's the article called. But he puts out this article about how my therapist has taken over my life, right? And in 2019, they start this podcast called The Shrink Next Door. And then it became a huge hit, right? So he's trimming his hedges. 01:21:46 yes guys listen to his story. He tells him the whole story and he's like we should start a podcast together and he's like and actually we should be business partners and you know it's kind of like possible like what is you don't have anyone to give your will to it's kind of crazy that you haven't thought about this before. Like what are you talking about? Like I don't know man uh 01:22:12 hold on. getting one more image here and he's like he's like he's like. Are you not convinced? Let me show you how cool my arms look how look and he's just got here. He's just taped hair to himself like he's clearly he's like. I know this guy's clearly dug the body up from the backyard and glued his hair to his her fore arms and so I even are man that's head hair. You just that's head hair to your arm. You psycho bath so 01:22:41 Hey in twenty nineteen the podcast comes out. It's a huge hit in twenty twenty one will feral and paul rudd star a pair in the shrink next door will feral playing marty paul rudd playing like dr. Ike Ike Hirsch koff, which I will say he's pulling it off and I don't know paul rudd does he's got the cool glasses. I don't know about his forearms though. Do have a picture of paul rudd's forearms like is it is he see that all right for arms? 01:23:09 I just need to know if like he's kind of he is a Kansas City man. I do know that if there's one thing I know about Kansas City man, they're pretty bald, they're pretty bald, so that's unfortunate. So the this came out in twenty twenty one in April of twenty twenty one. I actually don't remember if this came out first or after, but they never talked since like a since he sent that letter in twenty ten. Yeah, they never saw each other, never talked in April twenty twenty one. 01:23:38 The Department of Health concluded their case and they found Dr. Isaac Hershkov guilty of gross negligence, moral unfitness, exercising undue influence over a patient, violating boundaries between psychiatrist and client, and financial exploitation. His medical license was officially revoked and he's not allowed to do this anymore. Yeah, cool, whatever, but I mean it's been what, like, since the start of this 40 years. So homeboy's retired, who cares? Does he go to jail? 01:24:06 or does he just kind of be like you can't be a therapist? Who cares? I've done. I did it. I did it all. I did it and I also got like nine people's inheritance along. That's I mean like I don't. I know if you to pay all that back. I don't know. go to jail or is he just because honestly like the more I don't think the end of this story, the more I'm kind of like I should be a therapist that you're like. Oh, he got away with it. Yeah, he revoked his license and okay. Here we go. He is 01:24:35 Let's see. um I don't know did Doctor Ike Hershkoff go to jail Ike, her cop punishment. Yeah, what is his doctor? He loses appeal for medical license. Now he's looking all these you know he's doing the appeal to get his psychiatry license back, but I don't know if he yeah. I don't know so the moral of the story, I guess is like take advantage of people 01:25:05 What was he look like now? Show me, show me a her scarf. I tried, I can't find some. don't have a doctor of him. I mean, I guess he's probably in hiding ah yeah. I guess he's like overseas somewhere. I do a picture of Marty. Oh okay, okay, yeah, he's just so ripped. 01:25:27 So freaking yo, this is this is Marty and his sister in front of their house where so Marty now lives in the Hanton's house. He lives in the master bedroom. Yeah. And he obviously has put Markowitz back on the mailbox. Is that his recliner in there that you can see? Yes, I think that's probably the recliner they fought over. But uh 01:25:51 Joe said that he was there when one of the neighbors asked if the doctor still lives here and Marty responded, no, I finally got him out. The doctor's dead. And so he and Phyllis obviously have been rebuilding their relationship. They have weekly phone calls. She visits regularly, staying for long weekends. He sends birthday cards to nieces and extended family. he did actually just this year in 2025, he closed down the fabric store. Oh, interesting. Oh, in 2023, I didn't know this, he started, and I can't believe this, 01:26:21 sort of beekeeping sweet, you know, interesting because he was, know what? I've had someone take control of me. I would like the little village of bees that I can control and I'll do their whole thing and I get angry. I can kill one of them. They have. They have not had interaction. You know, interesting. So dug up the the cow. The cow is still buried in the backyard is like for him. That's part of the honestly 01:26:49 love the. I love the idea that that's not in the sellers disclosure that he probably passes away sometime soon. The house is sold. They forget to disclose that there's a cow buried in the backyard. Yeah, the new owners move in finder doing some landscaping. They're digging. They're like oh, there's something big under here. They keep digging and there's a full cow statue buried in our backyard. So we to call a police 01:27:17 Do we to tell someone one more quick thing when Marty first moved into this house when he first bought it and he planted a tree in the backyard in memory of his parents and Ike was like hey, that's you living the past. Yeah. Hey, I don't like that tree that tree made him tear down the tree. Oh, what a that was also a big breaking point. That sucks. So now when he moved back when he got Ike out, he planted two new oak trees, one for his mom, one for his dad, one for Ike and one for Ike just to remember him. 01:27:45 uh But after the podcast, he doesn't do public interviews. doesn't do, because he said that he all, everything he needs to say. And Joe Nacero concluded his article by saying this, that Marty didn't just escape, he re-emerged. That's a rare thing. Most people never get back what they lost, but Marty, Marty started planting trees. So Marty is living happily out the rest of his life in the Hamptons without Dr. I. Kershkov. Very cool. 01:28:12 So that's a crazy story. I can't wait to find the documentary 15 years from now when you realize what I've done to you. uh 01:28:22 Nice. Oh shoot. One more thing. So there is the cow in the backyard and so that's yeah, I think they have to disclose that if they sell it. um They also have to say like, in the atrium upstairs, just so you know, who awkward there, the devil message to me on Instagram, we formed a relationship. He took control of me for 30 years and then we in the upstairs bedroom had a fiddle off, the fiddle off in the bedroom. 01:29:03 Hey, thanks for being here for this episode of things on the last night. I don't know if you saw Tim have a stroke, but we appreciate you listen to this episode and if you want to let you want more like it, there's another doctor who had some you know, questionable stuff now practice malpractice. Yeah John R Brinkley. We did the episode. This is the guy who thought goat glands were basically a cure for everything and would just insert them inside of people surgically, which it does help you. Actually, if you ever like man, I got a cold shove some 01:29:33 goat glands in your throat. Yeah, yes, so you can go check out that episode and I'm honestly more importantly, please share this with somebody. Please share the show, get that word out. 01:29:44 and and then we'll see you next week on our things on last night. Yeah and if you want to see next week's episode right now, you can do that by becoming a patriot supporter. Our patrons get every episode of ad free a week early. They also get access to a discord with our hosts and producers and our patron supporters get invited to our exclusive Hampton parties. Yes, where you'll be forced to wear green polos and serve our other those that are more important than you. 01:30:09 way more important, like more important and none more important yeah, just healthier and because you were because your family is because your family doesn't party is OJ Simpson impersonators. We have a hundred of J Simpson in Perth, Senators in the backyard of the South Ampens. There are OJ other are. Is this something that people do? uh 01:30:39 in person. Yeah, what's the rate how how much honestly if you become a patron you can help us get a bunch of oj simpson impersonators to a party in the south amtas and you can know that you made that possible. I don't know like what that does for you. You at least see the video with a bunch of impersonators in one place. Yeah, he's finding some he's got an instagram pulled up. That looks just like that's crazy. 01:31:09 It looks like the only guy doing it is a guy named Cuba Gooding Jr. What Cuba Gooding Jr. That sounds like a real like is that an actor. I feel like I've heard that name. He's an OJ Simpson impersonator. Yeah, 01:31:30 out. Yeah, that is an actor. That's a famous actor. His rate is late in a movie. His rates a lot, but we have the same agent yeah, so


When most people think of therapy, they imagine healing, growth, and trust. But the story of Ike Herschkopf and The Shrink Next Door shows how one man used his role as a psychiatrist to manipulate and control a patient’s entire life. A Friendship That Wasn’t In the early 1980s, Marty Markowitz turned to psychiatrist Ike Herschkopf for help. Marty struggled … Read More