This Cult Promised Aliens Would Build Us a College | Ruth E. Norman Ep 351

11-10-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, man, what's up? I'm happy to be here. It's seven a.m. You're wearing these. It's bright. What you want for me, dude? You see the lights bright. I see the light. I thought maybe I would just, you know, I mean, I thought I would, I thought I would give myself a break from how bright these lights are. Okay. Alright. It's tough being in the spotlight, man. Oh, my God. Hello! It's me. I'll be your new wife. There's a soft peace and such a dead husband. I'm not in trouble. I am. Which trouble? Maybe our broken brains fit together. Things I learned last night. Keep them on. Keep them on. From the whole episode. Yeah. Why not? Why not? I was a freaking, um, I'm a CPR dummy. I'm not putting him in. Alright. Who is this episode about? Have you heard of Ruth E. Norman? Ruth? Not Ruthie. Ruth E. Norman. Ruth. Wanna see a picture of her? Sure. For the audio listener, I think she's dressed as Galinda, the good witch, right? I mean, that's look like that. That's not what she's wearing. That's not what she's wearing. She just happens to have the same style taste as Galinda. This is her everyday look. Yeah, just in line at the bank. You know what I mean? This has got to be the 80s, maybe, with the hairdo. Well, this is probably 2004. But she's had that hairdo since that kind of thing. Yeah. But yeah, this looks like a costume. But your time is not. Yeah, this is just who she is. Okay. What about Ernest Norman? Ernest Lee Lynn Norman? No, I have not heard of Ernest Norman. He looks like he killed her. Is that what this story is? He looks. This is like the photo they were using that's regretted documentary about. Like go back to her photo. Like a person so full of joy and whimsy. And then she married Ernest. You know what I'm saying? That's what this looks like. His eyes are crazy big. Like he's just like. Yeah. Yeah, this picture is not doing a lot of justice for what the crazy twist is. Is it the other way around is what happened? Yeah, she's the psychopath. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Also takes out. Okay. So Ruth and Ernest, are they a couple? Yeah, they're married. They're married. Wow, man. I mean, I guess yeah, they can give me a lot of info. Yeah, that's fair. No, so Ruth, she is, we'll start the story in March of 1976. She's a grandmother. Yeah. Yeah. She's a grandmother in El Cajon, California. And she walks into this place called Ladbrooks. Have you ever heard of Ladbrooks? Ladbrooks? Ladbrooks? Yeah. Is it California? This is not in California. I was going to say this image. This is a British. Yeah, I was going to say this was European. Yeah. Ladbrooks. Yeah. And they had one in California. No, she is. She lives in El Cajon, California. She went to Great Britain to go to a Ladbrooks. Okay. So there was some information that you guys, okay. No, no, no, no, no. You guys hear that I didn't do that, right? No, no, no, no. Alex, you heard that, right? Yeah. He was like, she's from California and she walks into Ladbrooks. I mean, it's fair. I did miss, I did skip the part where she got on a play to win to London. Yeah. I think that's what you meant to say. I think it is what I meant to say. Okay. And I know that this is what Europe looks like because I've been like a lot of finishes all the time. And I was like, wow, this looks like European. You can tell because it's a little dirty. No, oh my gosh. They don't clean stuff. And like, look. I mean, it is a little dirty. It is. I'm a little dirty. It's a little dirty. I'm not saying like Europe is a little dirty. But this picture is a little dirty. I didn't say that. I didn't say that Europeans are dirty people. Yeah. You didn't say any of that. You did not say that. Right. Good. Okay. We're on the same page. So Ladbrooks, is this a tire shop? What is this? I could see that. No. It's like a team America money back. Is this like, oh, is this like a, like a, like a payday loans type situation? Close, sir. Okay. No, this is a bookie. Like a, like a, like a sports bed. Like a bookie. Like a bookie. Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing. How she used to be a storefront. You know, staffed a lot into the store. It was either a storefront or two guys and leather jackets behind the pub. You know, and you would go out there and they would be like, oh, what about for? We wouldn't put the money. Okay. Yeah. Not other jacket. Yeah. And now they pull out an iPad and they go, place your bets on Polymarket. And you go, huh? Okay. Like, I won so much on Polymarket and they're like, how much did they pay to say that? Dog. I watched the Mamdani interview with Theo Von. Okay. Interesting. It was, yeah, because I saw a clip and I was just like, this is a, you know, interesting pairing. Yeah. And I think Theo Von's sneaky smart. He pretends to play as a character. For sure. But it was very weird to be watching the episode. And Theo was getting worked up about how all these companies are taking advantage of. And Mamdani was actually making a case for this is why, like the, the wealth disparity gap is why people are doing gambling apps more. Yeah. And trying to play the lottery more is that it feels like you have to like get lucky and hit big to make it in our current society. And then the episode took a break. And it cuts to Theo being like, it was just so weird. Then it was like, it was like, Amen. Uh, you're, you know, you ever think you got inside info or you know, you know something but you can place a bet on it. And it was just like, he did an ad read for one of the bad apps in the middle of a conversation about how those are destroying our society. And that's where I was like crazy. It was, it was just like, I don't know who approved this. It was probably hit me probably thought it was funny. I guess drop it. I guess. What do the, I don't know. Do we need like a little sound or something that makes it seem like we have an outbreak sound. Yeah. We don't need to do the whole outbreak. People skip it. You know, cool, cool. Cool. Amen. It's me, Jared and my buddy Tim. And we just want you to know you can place bets on Cal sheet. Um, do you think that don't, do you think that we're going to make a joke about? Uh, I, I, I don't know. I really don't know. You're freezing right now. You're freezing. I'm frozen. I'm frozen. God. If you had placed yesterday, if you had placed a bet that Tim would freeze and not know what to say, you would have just won a billion dollars. You'd be rich right now. But you didn't place that bet. Wait. It's not too late. You're right about you. You're pathetic. Oh, okay. Uh, you know, anyway, back to our episode. And the ad scripts they give us were kind of mean. Now she was like tell him that their moms think they're losers. It's their most effective. Cal sheet. Si. Yeah. So, yeah. So she goes into a bookie place. Yeah, she goes into a bookie and lad broke. There's a reason the word broke is in it. She puts in a bet for $4,000. And the bet is that. In 76. 1976. Tim, what did you say? I cut you off. $4,000 bet. I missed the back. I missed the back. Aliens will land on earth within one year. Okay. I mean, here's the thing. She was confident of this because she is an alien. Well, or bring some back up. That makes a lot more sense. Because this looks like is this uh, this looks like. Oh, wait, are they cult leaders? Is that what this becomes? Because this looks like, uh, what's the, what's the guy? The, with that 90s website that exists. All the people, all the people who drank the Kool-Aid. I know. What are they called? Is it Heaven's Gate? Heaven's Gate. That's right. Yeah. That looked very Heaven's Gate sound. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So she pays, she goes in. She goes, I like to put $4,000. Yeah. Which in 1976 is a billion dollars. And that's, don't even look it up in the calculator. I know it. I've memorized the charts. And, uh, as you said, aliens returning within the next year. Kind of a long window, but sure. Yeah. Could you place bets like that at Ladbrokes? Yeah. Is this one of those things? This is Kelsey. They really were like, hey, you can bet on anything here. Yeah. Yeah. And they were making a big deal out of it. They were like bet on anything. You can bet on politics. We don't even care if you're a politician. We don't even care if you know you're going to do the thing. Bet's on if we clean the storefront though, and we're not going to. We're not going to do it. Yeah. Unless the aliens come back, then we'll clean up for them. Okay. So, so she's pretty confident because why? Well, she's really confident. I don't know if I would say because, but it's evidence by the fact that she just bought 67 acres in Jamal, California. Okay. Because she's convinced that's where they're going to land. And they're going to build their college there. They're going to build a college for humans to learn everything that they know. So they're going to come back and build a college. Okay. Sure. There's what things these humans need. It's to learn. Can you imagine? Can you imagine going to that school where all the professors and everything? You imagine going to a different planet. What's going on? Yeah, honey. Honey, I took a new job as a producer. This is a professor. I took a new job. We do have to relocate to planet six, seven, four, nine, six, seven, four, nine. There's no intelligent life there. It's seven. He's like, oh, well, there's no intelligent life here either. We can leave that. I understand. But we do need to make a college. We're going to make intelligent life. Yeah. We're going to go. This lady built this lady's going to donate her land. You should see the way she dresses. No. Very fancy looking for roots. She's going to build a college. Okay. Yeah. And she also got a hole in it. And it's not even a college. It's just they call it a college. But it's, you know, it's just like. Well, they call it a college. But you're a janitor. And you're a volunteer who sings in the worship team until four in the morning at practice. And they make you do a lot of stuff. And then like, you know, once you turn 22, they realize, you're not really that useful anymore. So they just kind of cut you loose. Yeah. And then college is going to start River Leadership College. They call it Aliens Leadership College. Oh, we'll call it James River Leadership College. Well, name it after the river in Southeast Missouri. Yeah. But is it this California? Yeah. And the whole strategy. Why is she in Europe placing this bet? Because that was where the bookies were. I mean, I guess she killed that. Did she like go to Europe to place this bet? Yes. Yes. Okay. That's a level of confidence. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She also got a full wardrobe. And she only had $4,000 left at the end of all this. That's what I'm saying. 4,000, like you fly to Europe. Make it 10. You know what I'm saying? Like if you're shocked. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I don't know what the odds are. But even then like really good odds. You're walking away like the best case scenario. Like for sure. Like best case scenario. It's true. That's fair. And then she also bought a whole new wardrobe because she was convinced that aliens were going to take her on a world tour and to meet all the world leaders. She's like, she's like, they're going to want to meet everyone on it. I will be the liaison. And so I need a nice new wardrobe for this. They're going to want to meet everyone. Here's the thing, man. Imagine. I know I'm interrupting a lot. But aliens come to your house because you bought them land or whatever. And they're like, yeah, you can build a school back here. Yeah. And they go, all right, we'd like to meet the king. And you go. Yeah. Set it up, Tim. Hey, yeah, what do you do? That's what I was saying. Hello, the king. Like, they don't need you. If that's what they're going to do. Yeah. Like you can't make that happen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's like when people are like, I did the cruise. And these people mean well, but we're at lunch and someone's like, you were very funny last time. I was like, thanks. And like, have you ever thought about going on Jimmy Fallon? And I'm like, I'm sitting there like, oh, damn, I wish I thought of that. I didn't occur to me to try to get on the night show. I thought of that. Oh, my gosh. They're like, yeah, and maybe you can get a Netflix special. What? I never even thought that that was an option. Why didn't I think of that? What is this Netflix special? Like, that's the thing, man. Yeah. That's what I mean. Yeah. So like, they don't need you. Yeah. But, okay. So she bought all this wardrobe. That's what that picture was. Yeah. That was one of her outfits that she was going to say. She was going to walk into the prime minister's mansion and be like, I have brought you in. Hello. It's me. Ruth. And I have brought good news. Well, the good news. The good news. The important thing at this point, she wasn't going by Ruth. Obviously. Obviously. Obviously. Obviously. Obviously, I was gonna go by Stardnarch or whatever alien method. What is it? She, at this point, was going by Archangel Eurial, Queen of the Archangels. Oh, yeah. So obviously she's the Queen. I would like to place a $4,000 bet that the aliens are gonna return within a year. Great. Okay. Money. What's the sail. That's the first day's date is what? March 1976. March. Any day. 1976. I don't have an Apple Watch because it's 1976. And I also don't have a calendar. So we're just going to play March. Well. And what name should we put on this bet? Archangel. You're real. You're real. You're real. You're real. You know, you're real. You're real. You're so you're trying to say me your name is you're real. Suspicious. Suspicious. So. But we will take this bet for sure. Yeah, we're deciding to do this. Who decides what the like at Ladbrokes? There's obviously an algorithm on Kowshi but who at Ladbrokes is like deciding what the odds that they're going to accept are you know saying? I mean, I think someone comes in and makes a bet and they say, yeah, we'll take that bet. Okay. I think that's how it works. But that's what I mean though is that like you trust the person on the front counter to be like, yeah, we'll take that bet. I think so. Okay. All right. That's my I mean, I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. But I think so. I've never been to a store fun bookie before a strip mall bookie. Yeah. It's just next to the Apple store in the Glendale Galleria. Sure. So I think next to build a bear. Yeah, between the two. So I think the best place to go from here is to kind of rewind a little bit to how we got to this point, because I feel like we kind of like pedal to the metal into this story. Okay. Talk about Ernest Norman first. We haven't we haven't talked about Ernest Norman. Yeah, Ernest Norman is her husband. He was born in Logan, Utah in 1904. Okay. He's the fifth of eight kids. Yeah, Mormon. Yeah, probably I'm in the Logan. Yeah. And he was like a pretty intelligent kid. He was like when he was a kid, he was making microscopes for fun. And he was using like weird, mathematic principles to solve problems throughout his house. Sure. All that type of like typical things you hear of like a really smart kid growing up, like looking back at their child and how they did crazy things that most kids aren't doing. You know, he moved to California age 17. And when he got to California, he kind of took a weird turn a little bit. He had been very like pretty grounded, pretty scientific kind of guy. And then he got into clairvoyance and palm reading and fortune telling. And he win. I was just looking at my hands. I was just taking a gander. And then he went during World War II. He was like, oh, this is a perfect opportunity for me to help with my skills. And so he would go find the women of people whose husbands I thought this literally just yesterday. I was like, is there a documentary or a book or something about all the men who didn't get drafted? What they did like because you just look up and it's like you're one of 10 in your town now. There's just not a lot of guys around anymore. Yeah. And what life was like for those guys? Yeah, that's interesting. That is interesting. I have never thought about that. Because like there's just no man around. Yeah. There's old dudes. There's old guys. Yeah. And you for some reason. All the guys draft Dodgers and people that the military was like, nah. Yeah. That's what I mean. And like, and also just like a lot of lonely women. And you're just, oh, and it's the 40s. Yeah, that's crazy. So you're just, you're just like, hey, duts. That's crazy. And she's like, ew. She's like, I'm trying to wait a little more. She's like, ew. And then three months into this war. She's like, yeah, you know, he's the only guy around. There's only one guy in this town. Yeah. It's like it old people homes. Yeah. You know, whenever someone's wife dies and then all the women line up with cast roles to be like, I'll be your new wife. And then they're like, oh, okay. Yeah. Interesting. I mean, yeah. Just think about it. I just thought about it yesterday. That's an interesting thought. And I've never thought about it. I don't remember why I was saying about that. I don't remember how that came up with my brain. But well, honestly, that's probably what this guy was doing now that I think about it. Because he would go and he would find women. And he would tell them where their loved ones were. And that's what I mean. Because he would go and he would find women. And he would tell them where their loved ones were. And usually they'd be dead. And so he was like, he was just, he was just, he'd be like, oh, they died. Yeah. Let me see your hand. It was such a soft hand. And such a dead husband. What the heck? We should kiss. I don't make it better. Let me see your hands. He's a goner. Yes, I know. Take time to process. Yes, I know. Try my shoulder. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes. Hey, we just produced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live hangouts. You get to join the Discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price. Because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so, but also, you know, the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, like, what, you know, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. And, uh, no. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody you like the show. And thanks for being here for this episode. No, it's just like the dear John letters, like the amount of women who, so, uh, you know what? That's where I was listening to it. I was, I was, uh, there's a book called something myth, the myth of the greatest generation, you know? And there's this idea that they went off and won the wars and then came back and had two and a half kids each and were first in the whole time. And they all got saved. And like, uh, but honestly, they had the highest of horse rates of any generation ever. Yep. You know, up to that point and still. Yeah. And also like the dear John letters and just the awful PTSD that we didn't know they had. 100%. And, uh, and so anyway, but yeah, that's why I was thinking about it. I was like, what do we, what about the guys that didn't go? Just chilling, starting cults. You know? So he was telling all these women that their husbands died. And then he realized, oh, that was hurting morale more than it was helping. And so he stopped doing that. He's like, I'm not helping anybody. Yeah. Uh, and so he continues doing kind of his esoteric things. Well, but then their husbands come back. Yeah. And then, yeah, and then he's a hero for telling you. And he's like, he's like, he's like, your husband's a goner. But I know why you can bring him back to life. Oh, no. Oh, you got to kiss me. Where's my hug, though? Like I was like the worst guy. Where my hug, though? So he gets back. He's still doing his esotericism. But he doesn't really do any of this war stuff anymore. Sure. Let's look at Ruth for a second. Ruth was born in. Oh, we got a lot to do. He's pushing 100 and Indianapolis. And her family moved to Pasadena. 1900. Yeah. Thank you. Her family moved to Pasadena. And her dad was an upholster. Didn't make a good living. So she received very little education. And as soon as she was old enough to work, she went and started working as a fruit packer, as a milk maid. There's all these different things that kind of help the family out. Yeah. She later recounted that her dad was like abusive growing up as well. So like not a great upbringing. Like not the best, uh, uh, childhood. And so she, or she, when she turns 18, she moves out. She works in restaurants. She does a little bit of modeling. She does real estate. She works at a resort. She's a nanny. So she's kind of bouncing around jobs, trying to find what she can do and how she can, uh, make a living. And then in the 40s, she discovers spiritualism. Um, specifically channeling and past life regression. You know what these are? Yeah. Okay. Um, if you're listening. You don't know a past life regression is where you think back and you close your eyes and you remember your past lives and ideally, I think the goal is that you work through the problems from your past lives, your failures and your mistakes. And that's supposed to like fix your karma and like help you have a better life today. Um, and set you up for better future lives is the idea. Channeling is what Sharon's doing over here. Oh, sorry. I was a wasp in my last life. Oh, that's past life regression. Channeling. Channeling is what we changed. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Channeling is where you have close my eyes. I was imagining my previous life. I thought you were trying to channel. Yeah. I was. Channeling looks as if I was a blogger. But best. I got swatted with a fly swatter because I stung someone. No, I would never do that. I would never be a sticker. I'm a blog. I would never stick it. I'm a lover out of stingers. You know? No, he, uh, and if I was a worm, I would still love my wife though. If we were worms, yep. Yep. I was going to ask you if you kill me. I should probably let you finish. You finish what you're saying. Yeah, you're right. That's on me. If I was a worm, I would let you finish what you were saying. I can't talk because I'm just a man. The first thing he has a man, I'm a big dumb guy. Let me see your head. I think you're husband's dead. You're husband's dead. You're husband's dead. All right. I'm sorry. That was really funny. Channeling is where you channel the spirit of something speaks through you. Something speaks through you. Some alien or something. You're a vessel. Yeah. And you let them speak through you. And channeling was really popping off at this time. It was like a big, big pop. Really? It's a channeling. Yeah. Um, and she got really into this stuff. Sure. And that's how she was this guy. In 1954, she goes to this conference for experiences in conference. Ernest also goes. Ernest sees her from across the conference hall. And he goes and he says, hey, I just had like a psychic event. And like I. Eyes of the vision. You and I. Together forever. Are you married? Well, your husband's dead. And I think I could replace him. Well, your husband's dead. No, he says he says I just had like a psychic event. And I believe that you're actually the Pharaoh's daughter who protected Moses. That was who you were in a past life. And this is like she goes. You're right. And so they get married literally that day. They shut off. They get married right then. And they're like, oh, yeah, this makes sense. And so they're like, we must be soul-connected. I don't know why I am saying that to her is like such an approach. Because they're both broken brained people at a conference for channel. Like, what do you mean like, I don't know why? That's what that's what happens at those conferences. You meet other broken brains. Yeah. And you go, hey, maybe our broken brains fit together. Maybe our broken brains. And they go, yeah. So they get married and they become like the esotericists. Esotericists. Esotericists. Esotericists. Esotericists. Okay. Where they're writing books and all this stuff. And so Ernest writes all these books about Venus and Mars and how. How are these people making money? Is what I mean? Like, you know, like, how do you have time to write all these books? You're not making money? No. You write books. You go to the conferences. You do appearances. Like, it's the same way anybody does in any of these industries. It's like, they're speakers. People, they're griffed. Yeah. And they take donations. Yeah. But I mean, like, okay, okay. I mean, like, how did you have the time to write the first couple of them? You know? Like, you just wrote this fat book. And you just sit down and you just let it flow. I mean, how did Jeff Bezos have at the time to start Amazon? He made it. He saw a goal. He said it and he made it. And so did Ernest. Ernest had a goal. He saw it and he made it. I don't like. Where was it? He is. How did Jeff Bezos do it? He's fine. He's set out with a goal and a dream. And he achieved it. Rich Dad. And you're a weak little loser. Rich Dad. We're not. Find the time. Loving him. Okay. Relax. So he talks about. Have you talked to your echo about Jeff Bezos? No. Let's try it. Have we done this in the podcast before? I don't think we've done this in the podcast. Oh, Alexa. What do you think about how rich Jeff Bezos is? I think he should give us all of his money. She's trying to like logic us out of it. Yeah. Yeah. If you keep talking to her and then you say things like. I think. No, I'm not going to. I'm not going to put this on a pot. You're not going to catch me. Alexa stop. But there was there was one night where I was talking to the one of my house. I said that. I said, I think it's gross that he has that much money and she started going on about how the business model works and how he started. It was. It was very defensive. That's actually what I did that before. That was the most balanced. I've ever. I didn't expect that to happen. When I've done that before, it didn't ask follow up questions or anything like that. So they must have. They must have been listening to me. Well, they put AI in it. Now they don't. Maybe that's for it. I was like, I think we should round him up. We should surround him in public at a giant mob. And then she was like, take all his money. She really was. And I was like, tell him. Tell him what I do that. Tell him that I take all his money. I have no way to contact her. I said, his email is Jeff and Amazon. I have a way to contact me. And so I know you do. Now, we're. Have we talked about that time you and I were on the phone and I was at my house and I. I made some joke about having a bomb on the phone with you. Do you remember that? Yeah, right. You're saying it on our podcast. Sometimes that's a joke. I'll say I have a bomb. That's a funny joke. The YouTube algorithm is going to kill us for this. Sorry, not kill us. I just don't believe it. It's far enough. It's far enough for the episode. Okay. And then, but then my echo, I didn't even say like. Sorry, calling number one. My echo was like it sounds like you're in danger. That's what it said. It was like it sounds like you're in trouble. Would you like me to call emergency services that I was like, no. I'm not in trouble. This guy is making a threat. I'm not in trouble. I am the trouble. All right, Tim. I am the one who knocks. All right, relax. So he puts out this book called The Voice of Venus and a lot of other books. And so the books are like, hey, Venus is actually like a lush planet with cities and populated. Mars is the same. Everything about space, like there's all these other civilizations. And it's like there's this hierarchy of aliens and we're the lowest and all the stuff. We're the lowest. We're the worst. Yeah, we're always the lowest in every form of improvement stuff. So he turns her into a channeler. Like he like fosters channeling in her. So she starts channeling. And like, it's interesting because they do this. And who is she channeling? Cause like the pushar guy, he claims to be channeling pushar. One guy. Yeah. Is that how all channeling works? Um, no, some of them sometimes is just like, hey, if anyone wants to talk. I think it's like an open mic. You know, all the aliens are just like, you know, flash the light in your eyes when you're done. You're at time, buddy. They go, all right. I guess I'll just. Hey, everybody. I, uh, and they just go up there. They tell Mitch Hedberg jokes. I think most of them have like a single person that they channel. Okay. But some of them like Ruth is like, they've got this whole army of channeling people. Sure. Um, and so, uh, they, they start making some pretty crazy claims, um, where like in a past life, he was Jesus and she was Mary. Um, which is an interesting dynamic to choose. And now we're married. And we kids. So. Wait. Run it back. You're, you're Jesus and Mary and Mary is Jesus's mom. Best Quebec. She is my mommy. It's just like if you look at the reports, like it seemed like they contracted themselves. Cause sometimes she's Mary Magdalene. Sometimes she's Mary, Jesus's mother. So they do. And I think it's because they don't know their lie. I think it's because they don't know there's two. Okay. They don't realize that. Yeah. I think it's because they're lying. So. That's my guess. I think it's because they're just making stuff up. So they do kind of start to form a little bit of a cult following. Uh, and they're followers. You say a little bit of like a, how big does this group? I don't have any numbers at this point. Um, but there are things where it's like they had 12 followers. Yeah. I don't know at this point how many followers they had. Okay. But, uh, but what they did is they would have these students, these followers. And what they were told was that, um, they either, the members of their, their congregation, if you will, they had all these past lives. And they had accrued sub karma that they needed to heal. Okay. And that karma was based upon the things that they had done to earnest and Ruth and past lives. Sure. And so the, each of these people had done something to them either positively or negatively. And if it was negative, they had to heal from it. If it was positive, they obviously like, sure, were strengthened in the community. And then in, uh, December, 1971, uh, earnest dies at the age of 67. Wow. I could see neck on when I feel like. Um, and so Ruth takes over as the leader of this group. And this is when things kind of get weirder. Interesting. Yeah. Usually when a cult leader dies, things typically either dissipate or get 20 times weirder. Yes. Yes. I can't wait to see what happens when one of us dies. It is interesting. Actually, well, uh, make a prediction of the comments for what happens when one of us dies. Oh, I thought you were going to be like, make a prediction of which one dies first. Make a bet on calcium of which one of us dies first. I think you know, my heart's too big. No, so she, she enlists one of the followers in the group to kind of ascend to become her partner as like the leader of this cult. Okay. And it's guy by the name of Charles Spiegel. Charles Spiegel is an interesting guy. Spiegel. Charles Spiegel is an interesting guy because he had, uh, he had played a few, or he had lived a few lives throughout his life. Uh-huh. Uh, most notably, he had lived as Napoleon, uh, obviously Pontius Pilate. Okay. And Satan himself. And so he had a lot of karma to a tone for is the point that that I think comes out of this. He's done some terrible things. Yeah. Um, to Ruth, particularly as so he was Satan. And then that's why God made him Napoleon. Yeah. He's like, you will suffer as a five seven million. You're going to be sure he's like actually not even that short. It's actually not even that short. Not even that short. Kind of tall or got a pretty tall tall guy. So, okay. So they moved to San Diego. Uh, and they rename Ruth. This is where she becomes arc angle, arc angel Uriel, which is actually an acronym. It stands for Universal Radiant Infinite Eternal Light. Uh, which is cool. Okay. Uh, and then Uriel. She is continuing her channeling. She's constantly getting channeled by Plato, JFK, Freud, JFK and Oppenheimer. Like, oh, it's significant figures. Oppenheimer. Yeah. What? Okay. Uh, and so. JFK. Jesus. All right. Uh, so she can channel. This isn't like just channeling aliens. This is channeling. Anybody? Okay. Yeah. Uh, even the Apollo one astronauts. Uh, like she's channeling. But we're still alive. Yeah. So. It's like that. It's like that. But imagine, imagine that you see a video online, right? Let's just take this present break. And someone's like, I'm channeling Tim Stone from Things I Learn That's Night Podcast. He says that he has a bomb. He thinks it's very funny that he has a bomb. He says, no, it's a good bit. No, it's a good joke. It's like a funny bit to have a bomb and throw it somewhere with it. It's like, no, the joke's really funny. It's like he's channeling and you're watching it. And you're like, yeah, I guess I would say that. Yeah, I guess that. The Apollo astronauts are alive. And then they said to me that this is what happened. Yeah. And then that gets back to them. And they're like, that didn't happen. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like it's so much riskier to do. Like, you know, I don't think that the Apollo astronauts swim in the type of circles where that would ever get back to them. Swim in the type of thing. Yeah. Okay. I mean, I guess yeah, it wouldn't, it would be way harder for it to reach back to them in the 70s. Yeah. Now it would just show up on your feet and you're like, okay. Yeah, scroll and take talking to someone's channeling you. Yeah. No. And so, uh, and then I'm Jared Myers and I have some thoughts about recent events in the news. Oh boy, am I sick. I sure do need Tim's don't get well, quick trick. And what is it? It's simply chug an entire gallon of orange juice. Wow. I forgot. And then this shirt reminded me. I'm so glad that I have this shirt as a public service announcement, a public health service to other people around me. Do your part. Get this shirt shop.tillin.com. So she, she then gets a call from or a channel from a channel Nikolai Tesla. Okay. A call from. Is that how it work? That's what I'm saying. Is like, is she kind of like, oh, someone's trying to pass through right like, is it? Is channeling a thing where they sit down and like. Yeah. Space for it and happens or is it just like you're walking through the day and then you're like, hold on, I'm getting a message. Yes. It's like, it's like, it's, it's like you plan for it. Okay. You're like meditating to channel. And so this is in 1972. And this starts to kind of take it to where like she establishes this thing. And so she creates this community. The unaryous academy of science is what she calls it. Okay. So she gets a strip mall location. She buys a 19. A strip mall location. And actually, yeah, too. It's next to a little Caesars. It's like, yeah, the dry cleaners there and little seizures there. And then there's such a cult on the end. It's just a cult on the end. She buys a 1969 Cadillac Coupe de Ville. Okay. A blue one just like this. Beautiful car. And then she takes it to the shop and she gets some aftermarket modifications done. Okay. And she begins teaching this idea that the aliens are coming. Which theater is this? Are you sure this is the car welcome space brothers? Yes. What's the space brothers? The L.A. Three C. Okay. Okay. Yeah. That's more that's that's okay. Go back because this is a this is a modern image though because there's a metro by T mobile up there. Yeah. So this is a car that's still around. Yes, it is. Yes. Okay. And so she she after she starts Chameleon Tesla is where she starts then getting this connection to the aliens. Uh huh. And she basically starts to teach that the aliens are coming. Uh huh. And they're going to return in March of 1974. The fleet will land. Well, what they're going to do first is going to be one flying saucer first. That's going to be the scout. Flying saucers is the thing. Yes. Flying saucer is going to land first. That's going to be a scout. And that scout is going to persuade the humans that they need the college. Um. So this is this is an admissions counselor kind of. And then there's going to be a thousand alien Armada 33 ships worth of the aliens top scientists bringing crystal computers and lost teachings from Atlantis. Uh and their goal is to start this college that is going to incriminate disease on earth. And so she is tasked with building or like I guess essentially creating the parking lot for them to land in. And so she buys the 67 acres outside San Diego. Okay. And these 67 acres were you guessed it purchased by donor funds for the right Academy of Sciences. She had spent the last couple of years like raising this money to be able to do this. How much money was that? Do you know? I don't know exactly how much money we don't have record of how much cost. And so she also that's where the money came from for her outfits. Yeah. Okay. Of course. Of course for her back. And she's like, I also would like to. Guys, please give money. We need to create space for them to land. I need outfits because I'm going to have to talk to every world leader and you guys don't want to be embarrassed. Yeah. I want to be embarrassed. I have a new outfit for every leader. Yes. Yes. I want to give to the buckets around also. Should we put some money on it? You guys want to go in together on a bench? Should we put some money on this thing or what? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think that's the value of things like polymarket and cow she is that, you know, you know, really. The opinion is easier to read because people are putting their money behind it. Yeah. Right. Right. And yeah, of course, someone could put a lot more money on the outcome. But they want to achieve to kind of sway public opinion and make it seem like that's more important than that actually happening. But what do I know? Someone could also could bet on, anyway, insider trading. So, yeah. Let's do an ad read real quick. Okay. For cow she art sponsor this weekend. Remember, a year ago when my agent was like, Hey, man, how do you feel about Fandall? And I was like, I feel like you know how I feel about Fandall? And he was like, yeah, but it's like $10,000. And I was like, I like Fandall a lot. You didn't actually do it though. I still turn it down because I have principles. And I'm broke because of it. I hate. Do you have a nasty principles? Cow. Wait, dude. I wish I didn't have a conscience. So March 1976, she puts the bet says that within a year they're going to come in. Here's the thing. This was the bet was like, it was fanfare. And so she went and she did this and this became like a televised thing. Like they got the attention for doing this because Yeah, because she's putting her money where mouth is she's not saying. So it really was the same like legitimate. Yes. I was joking. That's what people say about power market. That's what people say about the betting markets. Yes. It's like, Hey, if she's putting money behind it, this is she she's pretty serious. Yeah. And so the press loves this. The press is like, of course, she put a $4,000 bet. She flew all the way to Europe. She bought 67 acres of land. She really believes that this is going to happen. And you should do. What was the media saying about actually though? I mean, they were just kind of reporting. They were like, yeah, one place of bet. This is the 70s news was different. They kind of. Sure. Today's top story is a woman placed a 4,000 bet that aliens would return. And also four people were murdered in front of the police. They did nothing about it. They did nothing about it. We'll see you again in 9 p.m. And now, Johnny Carson. And now, tonight's show, which if you're not becoming comedian, you should really try to get on this thing. I don't know if anyone's told you that. It's the news in 1976. They're like, they're like, yeah, this lady put a $4,000 bet on aliens returning the cops didn't do anything about that. And now Kevin Hart. And now Kevin Hart. So, okay. So a year goes by. Yeah, obviously nothing happens. Nothing happens. Then we know about our dumb human brains probably blocked it out. No, she says that, oh, actually, I messed it up. I messed it up. I messed it up. Here's why. The math's always wrong. So here's the thing about Ruth that I guess we need to address that we haven't said. She says she's lived about 50 lives over millions of years, which timeline doesn't make a lot of sense. Maybe there's gap time in there. I don't know exactly how that works. And the list of people that she's lived in or that she was lived as was the founder of Atlantis, Queen Elizabeth, the first, Peter the Great, Charlemagne, Kepler, Charlemagne the God. Yes. Host of the breakfast. Breakfast club. King Arthur. King Arthur. Who? King Arthur. Buddha. Snoop dog clip from the breakfast. Mona Lisa. And. And. Isis, the Egyptian goddess. Oh. Thank God. You're very smart. So she. And she claims that what had happened here and why she got the date wrong dates back to her past life as Isis, the Egyptian goddess. Because that there was going to be another return at that time. But just before she could usher in the return, she was assassinated. And the trauma from that assassination clouded her vision. Oh, of course. So she. She couldn't. She couldn't get the she correct. And so she said it's actually going to happen in 2001. It's going to be the real return. So. Finds her a lot of time to die. Yeah. I mean, is that in my run because she dies in like the what the 90s probably. So throughout the seven eyes in 1993, which she was like, oh, dang it. Now she doesn't know that you know, she's like, oh, that's going to happen in 2001, guys. Yeah. So in the late 70s, she builds a TV studio throughout the 80s. They're airing a broadcast on public access television all about their stuff and their theology. Right. And in 1988. Okay. Ruth breaks her hip. And so she goes to hospital. 88 year old woman happens. And so she breaks her hip. She goes to hospital and she's in the hospital. And all of her followers are like, we have to help. And the only way we can heal her is if we heal from our negative karma towards her. And so these followers, they dress up. Yeah. Simply having my dad's car accident. I was in the room with them and I was doing this in the corner. He's like, what are you doing? Healing you by healing me. Oh. I am healing both of us. She's here. Get the heck out of here. You're saying that because because of all the karma that I've put toward you. And so her followers showed up to the hospital dressed as their past lives. And they walked into her room. And they said, and they basically like confessed of the terrible things they did to her in a past life. Apologized for it and like asked for forgiveness. And they like were convinced that this was going to heal her hip. But to me, it's just so interesting. Like the scene to be that nurse you come in for like the next dose. And there's like eight people dressed in like a Victorian wear, ancient Egypt. And they're sobbing. They're like, yeah, they're sobbing. I'm so sad. That is so scary actually. He was. I'm so sorry for what I did. I'm so sorry. It's like a ring fair. I think if we get a ring fair nurse just standing around sobbing. Like apologizing. Yeah. And you're like, it's okay. You're like, okay. I stabbed her 700 years ago. And that's why she broke her hip. Yes, you're right. And actually, let's get in the elevator and go down to the 18th. Because I want you to meet a doctor down there. I want to meet you. I want you to meet the guy who does justice to the stabbers. And it's the elevator's open dark floor. No AC. Not like everything else in the hospital is pristine and clean. This floor just clearly not supposed to be there. It's just speagled. And it's just there. Pain in red. Hey, no clothes. I'm safe. What? The heat has turned all the way up on this floor. I'm sitting. Like, is this... It doesn't seem like a normal hospital thing to do. Oh, I rented this floor. Well, I'm not a person who expects normal things. So I believe it. Oh, hello, Satan. They're doing a weird voice. I'm sorry for what I did. Who do you have been in the past? Who would I have been in the past? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, interesting. I mean, my life's been mediocre. So like... Sure. My karma wouldn't have been great. So like, I probably would have been someone who's just like fine. So probably no one you've heard of, because it wasn't... Okay. It wasn't bad enough for my life to be horrible. It was also good enough that my life is just kind of whatever. Cool. What about you? It's a great question. Um... Golly, I think I would have been... Just a soldier who died in every battle that's ever existed. Just a front lines guy who was like, let's go first person that died in there. And everyone died. Yeah. That actually, like way back, you probably were really bad. If you were... I'm not good at war. That's why I should die in them. But I am eager. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So... That's what this said. Okay. So... She then... She heals, of course, but that wasn't had nothing to do with their little powwow. It was the doctors. She gets out of the hospital. And they continue their grief. Well, you don't know that. It couldn't be, because those people apologize. No. No thing so. And then... But then that does validate them, for sure. They're like, we... They're like, we heal there, of course. Yeah. Of course. And so... And then in July 12, 1993, Ruth finally dies. Wow! I should have put some money on that. I should have placed it back, because... Or run it back earlier when I said... Yeah. And it was interesting, because after her death... I'm... She died in 93? Yeah. And then I was born like nine months later. Interesting. I am Ruth. Well, and you should give me all your money. She dies in 93. And she kind of becomes like... Like a full-keyer outside of their group. Of course. Yeah. And so she gets the point where like... MTV runs like a... The Music Awards uses her as like a character in the 1996 Music Awards. She's a cover of books. She had a film series in Los Angeles. Like, there was a whole like... This... She became big, like way bigger than her little community. Okay. After her death. But it lasted only a couple of years. There's 2001 came along. Kind of close. In 1997, Heaven's Gate happened. Oh. And this changed the public perception of these groups specifically of the alien angled cults. Got it. Because that was what the Heaven's Gate was, the aliens are coming. We have to kill ourselves. They can take us. Right. And so she... Her like... Like a... And the excitement around her suddenly changed. And it was like... Oh, these were griftuous. You were like taking advantage of legitimately mentally ill people. These are like dangerous all of a sudden. And it wasn't like that. And so that... Like, there are still some of her followers out there that still exist. And they... Like you said, like... Yeah, that was a modern picture of it. Yeah. And so there's... And that is her car. That's her car. Yeah. Wow. And so it still exists. They still have her little storefront. And like, they're still putting out books and things. But it's... And she was around. Nothing like it was for those few years after she had passed. Oh, the aliens didn't come in 2001. I guess she clarified that. Yeah. She didn't put money on that one, though. So we knew she wasn't serious. Sure, sure, sure. Yeah. Yeah. Of course, the aliens didn't show up in 2001. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Not in my previous life. You're Satan. I'm Satan. I see. I see a battle happening. You're Satan, obviously. Obviously. But you're so short. Just a short little guy. So I'm Satan. You're so mad. And I have a fiddle. And I hate you with him. I don't defeat you with the power of music. I'd defeat you with brute strength. Hey, thanks for being here for this episode of Things on the Last Night. If you liked it and you want to watch another one, if you're listening at 2.2 speed, that's crazy. I was talking like an auctioneer for a second. Hey, thanks for listening. Thanks for listening. This sucks me. Go listen to remote viewing. It's an episode we did about remote viewing and I couldn't tell you a single thing about it to be honest. Except for it is the episode where Tim's riding and kind of believing it for a little bit. And so it's, I think you'd like it. So thanks for supporting the show. Share it with somebody. Tell somebody about it. So we'll see you next week. Man, I forgot I tried that. That's so funny.


Ruth E. Norman was an American spiritual leader who, in March 1976, placed a wager of 4,000 dollars at a Ladbrokes betting office in Britain. The bet was that aliens would land on Earth within one year. By then she went by the name Archangel Uriel, and she led a group in southern California that taught that a fleet of … Read More

We Almost Eradicated Malaria. Then We Stopped. | Fred Soper Ep 350

11-03-26

Episode Transcription

Hey man. What's going on brother. I'm happy to be here. Me too. Good. Are you happy to be here? Ah! Ah! Ah! Oh. Jim. Ah! Oh! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Look, that's what, look! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm never going to hurt you. And then look. Oh god. Oh no, no. Oh! I don't know when that photo was taken, that could have been taken pre-war, because he's an obviously an adult by the time he's taken it. This is my pre-war photo, yeah. Yeah. And so this was a... Isn't it crazy that all photos of us right now are pre-war? Things I learned last night. Yeah. I kissed to that. Have you ever heard of Fred Soeper? Fred Soeper. Oh, you're loving black and white photos these days. You're loving going way back. This is kind of brown. Fred Soeper. Dean here riding a donkey in Jerusalem. Is this Jerusalem? No. I had to wait so long for you to take a sip of water. I was trying to hit you with Jerusalem at the right time. No, it's all right. But it is like an 1800s brick building in the background with a straw roof. Yeah, it's like this roof. This roof with a straw roof. Yeah, this roof would get blown off by a big bad roof. You know, he helps and he puffs. That's accurate, actually. So very dead-on. Now, here's another photo of Fred Soeper a little bit more. All right. A little bit more flirty. I like this. Yeah. Too late for that mustache. Glasses don't fit the face. That's good. Yeah. Wait, too late for the mustache? Yeah. Or this is too early. I don't know when they did this photo. This photo might have been early enough because he was alive at the time. It is a mustache of the person whose name we can't say. Yeah. But he was around at the time. Well, the more. He was around at the time. So like, oh. So this story takes place after, but this photo could have been taken before. You know, like this is like, he was around at the time where it's like, we could have not known. There's potential. There's potential. Yeah. Or he saw the pictures of them and was like, I like that style. I like that. Let me take that to my barber. Okay. Let me take a picture of that to my barber. No, Fred Soeper is an interesting guy. I think the place to start with this is actually World War II. Because during World War II, something interesting was happening. General MacArthur, we talked about MacArthur on this podcast before. He was. He's the guy on ESPN. What? He's got that show. He does the, he's really annoying, but he does the, you know, he's like, he's like the young guy on the younger guy on the panel. Everyone. I can't think of who MacArthur would be on ESPN. You can't. For real? No. Who are you trying to say? That podcast TV show thing. And he was like punter for that. Oh, oh, why would you, why would you say my car there? Because what's his last name, Tim? I don't remember. MacAfee. MacAfee. You're right. There we go. That's why I said MacArthur. And then the bit drug on so long because you didn't know who I was talking about. You're right. You're right. Anyways, just MacArthur with his car. Oh, I'm so annoyed already. Just MacArthur with his car. We did talk about him in, I don't, I don't remember which episode. Yeah. Too young to be wearing this pants that high. No. I think we should bring it back. High pants? Yeah, dude. Yeah, if you saw a guy wearing this. It likes your body better. No. Yeah. It makes you look weird. No. That does not fit your body well at all. It fits your body better, but the reason that we moved it further down to the waist where most people wear their pants now is because people wanted to artificially decrease their waist size. And so they moved it down because you can fit tighter pants. I'm telling you, that's what happened. I think it looks so weird wearing your waist. Yeah, but high. But it's not meant to be worn without a jacket is the whole thing. You're supposed to wear the jacket, you know, over the dress pants and wear the pants. I mean, yeah. If you're wearing a jacket like it, yeah. I like, I like high-waisted pants on a man. I don't. I think it looks so bad. Yeah. But to be fair, I also think anything other than skinny jeans looks bad. So maybe mine doesn't count. Brie keeps telling me. I have bad opinions. How hairy were General MacArthur's arms? I don't think we know. I don't think there's any arcs. I don't think we know. Archaeological evidence. Yeah. There was a cave painting of him. And in that cave, maybe we're going to have time for your stupid bits. We don't have time for your jokes. So MacArthur was fighting in the end that you don't have to talk at one and a half. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. We're on a time crunch. So today's episode is going to be pretty on it. Yeah. So Tim's going to be like, I think skinny jeans are hot. I would say hot. I would say they look better than any other jean. I'll tell you what I think is hot. That CPR dummy is still here, thinking about it all day. No. So General MacArthur is fighting the Pacific front. And he is saying, I'm having a problem because for every three soldiers I've got, I've got one that's actually active on the front line, I've got one that's on leave. And I've got one that's in the hospital with malaria. And he's like, we need not funny, but there's the way you go. He's like, we got to do something about this malaria problem. It's infecting everyone in the Pacific front. And so he goes back to the government and he says, what can you guys do about malaria? And they're like, I don't know. It's basically the biggest disease ever. Like, and so like, I don't know what you expect us to do about it. And so through this, the government kind of sits down and says, what if we were to eradicate malaria? And so they looked at Fred, they called Fred Soeper. Fred Soeper was a guy in Kansas who had been working in Brazil in a novel technique because there had been methods for malaria up to this point, but they're all more treatment. What happens if you get malaria? Oh, I'm glad you asked. What are the symptoms? So essentially, if you start out at the bottom here, like right in the bottom middle, you get bit by mosquito. Yup. And a mosquito infects you with the malaria spore essentially. And that will travel into your liver, from the blood into your liver, infects your liver. And then there, it essentially multiplies and it reproduces, and there's this crazy name for it, schizzyogony or something like that. And so then they move throughout your bloodstream, attack your red blood cells. And they can damage your red blood cells, they can destroy them. And moving through that red blood cell, they're now attached to that red blood cell. Okay. So next time a mosquito bites you, that mosquito is now infected with malaria. Got it. And inside the mosquito, it then forms that same thing that's going to get infected, infected next person. And then the... Oh, I see. So that's how it spreads so fast because both on the human side and the mosquito side, there's a development cycle that's unique to the biology of both of those hosts for the parasite. And in a human, what happens is you essentially get like the worst... On the best case scenario, you're going to get the worst flu you've ever had. Okay. So you're going to have a high fever, all of your flu systems. Temporary though? Well, it's going to last a couple of weeks. Sure. Best case scenario, temporary, right? Best case scenario. Yes, worst case scenario. Your liver shuts down, worst case scenario starts killing all your red blood cells. Another one, your spleen could just rupture, your lungs might fill with fluid. And so these soldiers were getting infected. They were getting sick. They would go through the flu. And what would actually happen is they would sometimes this would happen actually while they were in the infirmary. Yeah. Sometimes they would go back out in the combat and they'd be in combat and all of a sudden their spleen would rupture or all of a sudden their lungs would start filling with fluid. And so it was like adverse effects of malaria that were happening after the fact. Oh, yeah. After they thought they were in the clear. And so this was a huge problem because obviously you don't want your soldiers to just randomly be dying. That is not good for war. Yeah, it's not part of your tactic. Yeah, so we're going to send this fluid over here for them. Randomly going to die. We just got to be ready for it. We got to be ready for that. Expect it. The unexpected. And so the government starts putting together a plan to fight this, which was arrogant doesn't even begin to sum up, like malaria by some estimates is the biggest killer of humans in history. It's not just like the biggest disease. No way. Yeah, it's not just the biggest disease is the biggest killer of humans. And so they say that 5% of all humans who have ever lived were killed by malaria. Who have ever lived, not just like in a specific way, but yeah. But also that percentage doesn't, I mean, I guess there's a lot of ways to die, I guess. That makes sense. Yeah. And it was such a big deal, like to the point where, and it definitely is at least 1,000 ways to die. And they haven't they didn't have an episode of 1,000 ways to die, but it was malaria. I bet. I was pretty short episode. I got it. I was, you know, now he's dead. 1,000 ways to die. They did. They did weird bits for that. They didn't. I don't think they would unless it was a weird way he got that if he got a bit weird than they would do it. What do you mean? We should watch, I haven't seen that the only one I remember is a vending machine falling on somebody. Oh, they were all weird, and I'm going to be honest with you, we couldn't watch most of them. Oh, yeah. We couldn't do it on our show for sure. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they were like, did you watch that show? Now, you were reading books and stuff, said, derogatory, like, no, you were probably reading books. We were up late watching 1,000 ways to die, and then we would fall asleep and wake up to some crazy commercials in the middle of the night. But anyway, we would ever. Yeah. That is a millennial core experience. Yeah. No, but they basically were like, okay, we're going to take the biggest killer of humanity at that to ever exist. And we're going to eradicate it, which is crazy, because we had to go. We're a lofty goal. Yeah, and we had never eradicated anything yet. This was a new idea. Oh, this wasn't. Okay. Yeah. This is World War II. And so we hadn't eradicated. We were attempting. There was things we were attempting. But we hadn't eradicated that disease yet. Really? Yeah. And so in the early 40s, they contacted Fred Soeper. And Fred Soeper was... Isn't that crazy? Less than a hundred years ago, we had eradicated zero diseases. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. It's pretty bonkers, if you think about it. Geez, man. So Fred Soeper, he lived in Kansas, but he had recently attempted this in Brazil. Okay. And what's interesting about him specifically was there's a lot of people trying to fight malaria. But the way they were doing it is they were doing it through drugs. And what you would do is you would take the drug to prevent it, but you would also take the drug to treat it. And so it was fighting the drug, it was fighting malaria in us. And Fred Soeper was saying, fight the mosquitoes, dude. Fight the mosquito. He's like, you're fighting the wrong thing, bro. Real talk. Fight the mosquitoes. No cap. Why did you say, bro, fight the mosquitoes, bro? I don't know, I don't know. Fight the mosquitoes, dude. So he had been using an insecticide called DDT, which stands for, I was going to say, what is DDT said? Die, chloro, diphenyl, trick, low dora thing, nailed it, freaking nailed it. I was nervous going into that, but I got it DDT. And so this is a pesticide. He comes up with a plan where he says, you don't want to see what these mosquitoes were like on DDT. He realizes that a mosquito that has DDT, all you have to do is you have to get it on them. Okay. You can store it into them. Yeah. Oh, wow. And it will carry this DDT for months. And so you could spray once in an area. And if a mosquito lands on anything in that area, it's contracting that DDT. And then that pesticide is going to kill it. And so it's like, we just got to kill all those mosquitoes. And so he takes a map of Brazil, which had a particularly dangerous strain of malaria. And he formats it into this grid and he puts together basically an army of people to fly over, walk through hills and just spray this whole area of Brazil on a schedule. And so that way, there's never a moment where it's not covered in this pesticide. And so that the mosquitoes are basically just perpetually going to be coming in contact with it. And it works so well that the government was like, he's our guy. Like he clearly knows how to kill stuff. And there's nothing more the government loves than someone who knows how to kill stuff. And so they call him. He's our guy. And they basically are like, hey, can you do this in Japan? And it works so well within a matter of, within a matter of months, it got to the point where malaria was basically eradicated in Japan in a matter of months. And so they were like, oh my gosh, this might actually work. So the government sees this and it really does make a difference in the Pacific front in the war. Where are we at in the war? What year? Uh, when soaps involved, let me double check the timeline because that does make his mustache even more questionable. Well, I don't know when that photo was taken, that could have been taken pre-war because he's an obviously an adult by the time he's involved in my pre-war photo. Yeah. Yeah. And so this would have, Isn't it crazy that all photos of us right now are pre-war? Okay. I'm just putting that out there because that's a wild clip. Yeah. Yeah. 30 years from now, we get drafted in the world. Thirty years. Where they're pulled. Sixty two year olds in a big enough war that's what I'm saying. Yeah. That's fair. Hey. I'm not saying anything is impossible. I'm trying to stall to give you time. Well, it was, it, it says by the beginning of 1945. Okay. Okay. So yeah. Yeah. Let's just say. Hey, we just reduced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live hangouts. You get to join the Discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so, but also, you know, the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, like, what, you know, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. No. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody you like the show and thanks for being here for this episode. And so they were like, we got to finish this war real quick, but we need to remember that because that was interesting. And so the war ends. And then they basically out of the war room. I don't remember. I can't remember. No, and then the war ends and the US government comes together and they're like, hey, let's put together this organization to actually defeat malaria. And so this is how they start the who, the World Health Organization. So they get who? Yeah. When we started a British rock band, a really sick band to fight malaria. Yeah. A lot of people don't know that mosquitoes hate that song. That was a really dumb bit. Think about how much you hate that song with mosquitoes hate it's so much more. That's that buzzing sound. And it's one of those things where it's like, once you play it, the who stays, you know, you better hurry up looking at the clock. Tim's got to get out of here. So Tim doesn't leave on time. His kid gets put outside. Oh my gosh. So the babies are the Tim hired is on a very strict schedule and it's 6-0-1. Baby outside, doors locked, show is on, all right? So throughout the end of the 40s, the US starts to implement this in the States. Yeah. And what's really interesting about the United States is this was particularly a Southern issue before this. And that babysitter I was talking about is your father-in-law, right? That's what I think your baby's what today? Yeah. Mike is just like, you guys figure it out. It's on you now. He sends a text. Baby's outside. Baby's outside. So through the end of the 40s, they start to duplicate this in the United States. Okay. So this is such a problem that in South Carolina, throughout this point, you had a 16% chance of dying by adulthood from malaria. Oh, that's crazy. That's way higher than 5%. Well, 5% of all of all of them get it to a huge number. And so- That's what I was saying. When you said 5%, I was like, I just didn't sound as dramatic. I guess all of humanity, I guess, for the billions of people who have ever lived. That's a lot. Billions? Yeah. You think in 6,000 years, there's been a, there's been billions now. There are billions now. Oh, yeah. Billions of people who are currently alive. That makes more sense. But- That makes more sense. But- It's probably in the trillions, huh? How many people- How many people do we think have ever existed? I- Here's my ballpark guess. I'm going to say 50 billion. 50. Okay. That's interesting, because we have, I mean, we've been growing my crazy, but like 50 billion. I don't know that, that might even be too much. Yeah. Yeah. Cause I'm thinking it's, yeah, it's exponential. It might be, it might be like the peak. It might be like in the 20s, 20. Yeah. Maybe not even the, let's see. What does the internet say? Uh, so the estimate, uh, from the population reference bureau. Okay. Don't know who that is. PRB. I know who they are. Uh, is 117 billion people. Oh, we were passing pretty off. Yeah. But 100 still. Yeah. Yeah. So five percent of that for 117 billion people who have ever existed and eight of them for right now. Yeah. That's crazy. Kind of wild. That is really wild. But yeah, for that, if, if that number is the number, almost the entire population of the earth right now is how many people have died from malaria in history. Pretty crazy. Which is a huge number. So they started doing this in the United States. And from 1947 to 1951, the government sprayed 6.5 million homes across the South. Um, and they drained the wetlands actually to be able to get the, the mosquitoes out and spray them. Yeah. Uh, and then they, they completely eradicated domestic malaria doing this by 1951. That's crazy. And so they in 1955 were like, here's the deal. We, this worked in Japan, this worked at home, this worked in Brazil. They were like, we think we can pull this off. And so in 1955, they convened the eighth World Health Assembly with 150 other nations in Mexico City. And we're like, here's what we're trying to do. Here's the plan to get rid of malaria. And so they basically penciled together this plan, uh, that would, uh, do this same process in every country that suffered from malaria globally and every member nation of who would contribute financially, right, to pull it off. This is particularly like a southern, the climate has to be warm enough for right from mosquito. Yeah. Cause they're, they're cold blooded. And so they put together a massive budget to go across literally every continent in the world and spray every continent for mosquitoes, uh, to eradicate malaria. The interesting thing though is in this meeting, they decided, uh, uh, they had a vote for whether or not they would extend their eradication efforts into sub-Saharan Africa. Uh, and they were like, do we need to eradicate there? Hey, guys, are we racist enough to not do this? And here's the thing. Like, like, obviously, there is a racism at play at part of for that vote. Sure. But there is a, there is a practical thing where getting, uh, sub-Saharan Africa was had the most, uh, lethal strain of, okay. Um, and so why wouldn't they? Well, it was so bad that to the point that during the colonization era, European colonizers didn't, uh, breach the coasts. And so like the whole slave trade comes from that Western coast of Africa, okay? They never pierced through because frankly, the Europeans would just die if they did. And so every, every, every issue was that lethal. Yeah. So they're saying it's more dangerous for us to go in and try to eradicate this. Well, a couple, a couple of things, um, yes, the suicide mission. Yeah. Yes, it was more dangerous, but two sub-Saharan Africa being so large and so rural, um, that was expensive. Yeah, it was going to be the most difficult to pull off. Sure. And also the most dangerous to pull. And the least amount of white people saved. I mean, there was definitely an elephant in an element of it. You, you, you, you could not, you have to acknowledge that there was a racial thing going on there. Yeah. Um, and so, uh, they elected not to do that there. And which is crazy. Um, and by the end of the decade, uh, in the 60s, they, they did it. They eradicated malaria everywhere for, except for in sub-Saharan Africa, uh, which brings us to the early 60s, okay, JFK pushed for a hundred million foreign assistance to go to sub-Saharan Africa to be able to bring the same sort of eradication effort into sub-Saharan Africa. Okay. It's just for relations of billion dollars, he put towards eradicating it there. So they did a pilot program in Zanzibar, which is 117th of the number of people who have ever existed. Thank you. Just trying to put numbers in perspective. Um, and so they did a, uh, pilot program in Zanzibar and Swaziland and they brought malaria to near zero by the end of that year on the early 60s, 62 through 67. They did it in Granada and St. Lucia, St. Lucia. Um, and so they started moving through, uh, uh, but by, uh, the end of the 60s, obviously, the governments had changed in the United States and the US withdrew their funding, um, for these programs. And so there were some states that got to see, um, uh, a different, an impact made, but some states in the, in Africa, obviously, they didn't, they didn't get touched yet. Right. And what we started to see happen throughout the 70s and the end of the 80s was malaria was exposed to this DDT, but it was not eradicated. So in a lot of these African countries where they started it, yeah, they evolved to be resistant to the DDT. Hey, thanks for listening to this episode of Things I Learned Last Night. If you like the show, you want to support us. We've got merchandise that you can get and it's a good stylish stuff that I made. I put a lot of work into this stuff. So, uh, it's great to find other Tilling fans in the wild and be like, wait a minute, I know that shirt. Uh, and so, uh, yeah, we would love for you to do that. You can pop over to shop.tilling.com or there's a QR code or there's a link in the description. There's plenty of ways to find it. We promised we made it super easy. So, uh, thanks for supporting the show and thanks for listening. So, was our way of doing it, were we like getting rid of mosquitoes? So we were, there was kind of two sides of this. It was getting rid of mosquitoes, but the passive side also killed the malaria. Yeah, it killed the malaria, but I mean like, and so it did, we're mosquitoes surviving? Uh, yes. We still have mosquitoes. It was both. There's not a world where we would have not had mosquitoes after this. No, no, no, no, no, okay, but there was a world that was living that world. We're not carrying this virus. Yeah. It's the world that they created. Uh, and so, what, what, what, what, what function do mosquitoes serve? Uh, they suck blood from people. I know that. I mean, as far as like, you know, how people are like, oh, all, you know, bugs all serve a purpose for the planet. Yeah. I don't, I don't know if those little bug rats do, yeah, that's fine. Bug rats. Um, bug leeches. leeches. They're a food source and pollinators, accidental pollinators, they say. Okay. So they're prey for a lot of aquatic species. Sure. And then yeah, they, they incidentally pollinate. So, okay. If we got rid of them, what would happen? You know, let's find out what happens. What happens if all the mosquitoes die? I've almost get a diet, millions of humans live will be saved. Okay. So nothing bad. But it says about local food, webs and ecosystems would face noticeable disruptions. Disruptions were collapsed. It just says disruptions. Because I feel like that's adjustable. I feel like that's one of the, in my, in my, it's like in my hometown, when the Long John Silver's KFC combo closed, like we, it was a disruption for sure, but we figured it out. That's crazy. Well, they were biting people and sucking their blood. The Long John Silver's. Yes. I don't understand. It was, I was trying to say there were the mosquito of my hometown. Okay. Okay. You were like, oh, yeah. Okay. That's crazy. Yeah. I know you don't get my jokes. You never do. So, there is a, so Bree's dad got me mad. You're, if you show up and eat later than no, but Bree will be. What should I, you inconvenienced my father? No, she's already got him. Oh, yeah. Oh, okay. So this is, this is, this is for taking care of my son in the evening to help make sure he's like, you know, thriving and alive. How's he doing? Is he got a job yet? A girlfriend? He does have a job. He is seeing somebody. It's getting pretty serious. He was asking me about, yeah, like we have proposals and how to do that. How to kiss? Yeah. That's why that's where I was going. That's where I was going. That's where I was going. Yeah. So you two get some of my jokes. No, so, so throughout the, the latter 20, 20th century, there is, they evolved where, yeah, they evolved and it got more dangers. And so, not only did we just neglect Sub-Saharan Africa, we made the problem worse in Sub-Saharan Africa. Great. And so you might remember when we were growing up, like this was a big deal. Yeah, they were sending, it was tense. They were sending those sleep tents all the time. Yes. And so this actually happened in 2003 because George W. Bush read a book called Roots, which was about... Okay. George W. Bush read The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe. And he was like, we gotta, we gotta send them nets. And Turkish Delight. Have you ever tried Turkish Delight? No. Have you ever had Turkish Delight? No. Not good. Wouldn't betray my family for it. Reads isn't interesting. Would not follow an ice queen into her castle over Turkish Delight. That's for sure. Yeah, yeah, they're not that good. A little weak soy boy. All right, Doc. Sorry. Hey, you know what? I won't do my part. My part is to do little ha ha and interrupt. Your part is to tell the story. I did a ha ha, okay. So George W. Bush read a book. Yeah, so the book... I'm glad he could read. The book was Roots. Roots traced to this guy's family tree through seven generations. It was like a historical novel. Okay. All the way back to a village in Gambia, which is where his family is from. And this makes George W. Bush fall in love with Gambia. And so he starts making all these trips to Gambia and like getting involved with charities in Gambia. And then allocating funds to Gambia for all different things. And so the United States then launches Petfar in 2003, which is the president's malaria initiative. And essentially what it does is they attributed $5,000 per person to eradicate malaria in Gambia. And this led up to the bed nets. And so what they discovered is through this they discovered we could get everybody these nets to put over their bed for two dollars and then just soak them in the pesticides in DDT. And then the any mosquito that comes in the middle of the night not only does it protect them from the mosquito but it infects them with the DDT. And so it doubles that. So the 2003 mosquito bed nets. Yeah. We were soaking the nets in DDT in pesticides. Yeah. And then having the person sleep inside the net. So we were we were setting mosquito traps. Yeah. With the people as live bait. People in the live bait. Yeah. They're laying there just sleeping there like yeah. And then George W. Bush was like I hope those mosquitoes try to get him. I don't think that's what he was saying. I mean, I guess technically I read a book and the book says that if the people lay underneath the nets. And the mosquitoes will come. And everyone's like Mr. President. There's no mosquitoes in the book. That's not what the book is about. The book was about mosquitoes. The book has nothing to do with this. You know. My friend Lauren. Yeah. Dawson. Yeah. Irland Baugh gets pretty mad when I make fun of W. Bush. Yeah. Cause she thinks really highly of Laura Bush. Yeah. And she says you can't say that George W. Bush was an idiot because that means that Laura Bush married an idiot and she wouldn't do that. That's literally her justification. And I and I got us. So Lauren, if you hear this. Yikes. You know, I have to respect George W. Bush. Yikes. Because we respect Laura. Yeah. And it's funny because the, you know, Bri would not marry someone who's stupid guys. Like you guys don't know Bri that well, but she wouldn't have done it. You know what I mean? Like he's got more. He's holding back more. There's something else he's not showing us because and Bri sees it, but we don't get it. You know. Okay. So she wouldn't marry me. So thanks to Bush. They start. Get your figure out of there. That's going to the edge. Okay. So thanks to Bush, we started fighting malaria in South Sub-Saharan Africa. Sure. And also started fighting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But and so by 2014, we saw malaria dip to the lowest level it had ever did before, which is kind of like the genuine one for forever. Yeah. And it's like, I wanted to say eradicated, but it's mere eradicated globally by 2014. I should know that. Yeah. It barely exists even in Sub-Saharan Africa. Really? But in 2017, we started seeing cases rise again. And what is interesting is. Yeah. It's an eradicated disease. And you know who hates those. Diseases. I don't like what I can't just let them disappear. He's been. I got to introduce this stuff back into the world. No, in 2017, it was as climate change. The climates started getting the. Oh, man, we are woke lives, dude. We're making fun of RFK. And then also we think climate change is real. If you thought for a second that we were still in our evangelical roots, yeah, like as episode shows that we've grown past it. Yeah. The climate got warmer. The climate got warmer. And so they could survive in more places in the world that hadn't been treated yet. Yeah. And so they started moving further north and further south into colder climates. That's crazy. And so that kind of spread the scope of what we have to hit. And then also. That's really interesting. Yeah. It's something that what surprised you is recently funding has been cut for all this. So we didn't we probably didn't treat places. We treat the entire continent of the United States. No, just the south. So we just. That's a problem. So we didn't treat it like up in Alaska and that you know, correct. North and South Dakota. Those places. There's basically, you could basically run this stretch around the center of the globe is where we were treating it. Yeah, the equator and like some. Yeah, yeah, but I mean like that. Yeah, essentially. Yeah. And so yeah, you go further north further south. We didn't treat there because it wasn't a problem there. And that's the kind of stuff that people like all the global alarmists like the global warming alarmists or whatever. And it's just like, yeah, man, there's so many different like small side effects of this. Yeah, yeah, I would have never. Oh, yeah, malaria is going to make our strong come back because this got worth. That's interesting. That's crazy. Yeah. I love it. Hey. And so why are we let them in here? So and then in 2025, because of funding cuts from the United States, the funding that they who had for this went from 9.3 billion to 3.9 billion. And so now there's even more just flip the number. There is even more of the globe is going untreated, which means we are going to see malaria cases skyrocket over the next few years. Yeah. Because not only is there the climate thing that is stretching the amount of land we need to cover. Yeah, but there's less funding. So we're covering less. And the scary thing about it is we have been doing this for so long. It's kind of one of these things is like once you do it, you have to continue do it because otherwise we're going to see the same sort of thing where they begin to adapt. And so we have to keep it down there. So there is no way of eradicating it completely. Well, if we if we got to zero, if we got to zero, we're done. We we've eradicated it. Then we can stop. We keep we keep making we keep making strong progress. Yeah. And then we take that progress for granted. And we slash funding. Yeah. Until we get to zero, we can't stop. If you know, if we stop, then it comes back stronger. And that's what we're we created this last year. So we're going to see this become a bigger issue once again, which is which is really exciting. But this all goes back. It was crazy about this. And what maybe I can and on a little bit of weird hope, this will be weird hope. But what's crazy about this is this all started because too many soldiers were dying at war. Yeah, from malaria. And so if war soldiers could get infected. Jim, maybe if we can just start wars and climate that have malaria, then we might get this thing turned around. No, but for real, like it is kind of crazy. If you think about it, how many things like we look at a lot of the progress that we made through the latter 20th century. So many of those things started in World War two where we were in this like insurmountable war, where we had to figure some crazy things out that were like, like who would have in industry? We haven't been back into a corner in a while. That's why we haven't been individuals. I'm not I'm not saying that. But what I'm saying is it is incredible to think how many of things came out of that. And how much because it was arrogant to say we could have eradicated malaria. And we almost pulled it off. And so we need a little bit more arrogance. I don't know, maybe desperation is the better thing. Yeah, well, we just yeah, I mean, wow. But yeah, this actually I do want to we don't normally do. But how did things get didn't we eradicated polio? Yeah. How did polio come back? It's very similar thing. We we we pull up we pumped the brakes. I don't think I don't think it was zero either. I don't know if it was full of zero. I thought we had I thought we had eradicated that. I thought we had and we hadn't eradicated like we eradicated measles in the United States, but not in the world. Same. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, we don't never do this, but I do want to shout out this whole thing. The only reason I know about any of this was a couple months ago contagious. I don't know. I don't know anything about polio. We didn't have to get the vaccine. Maybe we did eradicate it. I don't know. I don't know anything about it. Um, but I the only reason I know about this is there's a YouTube by the name of Justin Portella. I'm going to put a link to his video in the description. Honestly, incredible video covered this whole story. Yeah. And he links in that video to a charity. I think I'm going to link to that same charity, too, to help build these nets in South China, Africa. Yeah. I'll find it. So, um, the Patreon.com slash Tillin. That's a bad joke. And I'm not probably out. No, uh, we can find the link. We can find a link and a QR code for that charity. Yeah, give to that, give to that this month. Instead of our Patreon. On top of it. You just don't get to our Patreon. I was like, we still watch our money, but also two other money. I did not. I started a sentence and I didn't, I didn't know where to go. And that was that came out pretty bad. That's okay. Anyways. So that's kind of the story of malaria and how we got truly wild. We almost fixed it. We almost did it. We almost fixed it. Yeah. Anyways, wow. Yeah. Well, you can just tell it. Okay. I was like, I was like, I don't know how to think about creative way to fill this off. Hey, thanks for listening to some of the things I learned this night. If you liked it and you want more of it, we had an episode about the worm wall, which was an effort to get rid of screw worms. It was basically a border in Panama that we, they tried to make a line where the flies couldn't get past it. The flies were killing all these cows and stuff. It was crazy. It's a great episode. Very informative. Actually, pretty similar story. So also, here's the charity. Please go give it to that charity and in advance the efforts for getting rid of malaria as well as joining our Patreon and all the other stuff that we said in this episode. So we'll see you next week on things I learned last night. We do love that you hear and you listen to the show. Please share with somebody and we'll talk to you later.


Malaria is a parasitic disease transmitted by mosquitoes, and by some estimates it has killed more humans than any other cause. One figure puts the toll at roughly 5 percent of everyone who has ever lived. The effort to wipe it out began in earnest during World War II, when the United States military confronted a disease that was taking … Read More

How a Scam Made Warren Buffett Rich | The Salad Oil Scandal Ep 349

10-27-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, man. What's up? Happy to be here, man. Good. You see the joy in my eyes? Yeah, I can't actually. It's funny. I'm just so stoked. Can you see the joy in my eyes? Yeah. Have you ever heard of the salad oil scandal? This, there's no way there's enough for a full episode about salad oil. Yeah. Salad oil, the salad oil scandal? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I, okay, hold on, can I guess what this is? Yeah, go for it. I mean, I want to guess, when I think of salad oil, I think of how at church camp, they had a salad bar. And when I look back at that, I shouldn't have trusted the lettuce from church camp. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, you can't trust lettuce anywhere now. But church camp back in the day, you did a really good job. Especially not from church camp. I have no idea what. Well, let me ask you this. We already did that food influencer lady, right? Who had that whole restaurant that was like, it was fake vegan or whatever. She was like, she was in the field. Okay, not related to that. That might be a related episode, kind of. Interesting, okay. Let me ask you this. Have you heard of Anthony DeAngelis ran, or Anthony DeAngelis? Also known as, also known as Tino. Tino? Oh, gosh, you should've just said Tino, right? I don't Tino. Yeah, oh, I don't Tino. Oh, all right. Well, let's get into it. Sure. Yeah, but you can afford it when you're jacked. Like smoking cigarettes to maintain. Seven in a person. But pump the, you don't make a hot anymore. See, you're having a lot of to put your mouth on. That was, that was like the highlight of my PE class. Things I learned last night. Hey, if you're watching this episode, you might notice I've done something new with my appearance. Oh, no. Oh, no, is that what this is about? And you might have noticed that Jared is blindfolded if you're watching. If you're listening, here's the thing. Jared, I'm gonna let you take the blindfold off, but before you do, I need you to know. Do not describe anything. I just want this to be something. If you're listening, you need to go back and watch because there's no way to describe what's happening. There's no way to describe what you're gonna see. I'm really nervous now. Okay, so I'm gonna take this off. You've done something to your appearance. Yeah, I've been exploring new options. Oh no. Okay, I'm good. Yeah, yeah. All right. This was worth it for you, this was for you. I was gonna look the wrong way, it's a bit in the middle of the air, and I'm like, wait. I don't know what you're talking about. Is this a, you know, I don't know what's going on. That's a weird look for you, buddy. Yeah, it's functional. It doesn't mean that to the audio listener is freaking crazy, dude, saying it's functional. Yeah, you can use this afterwards if you want to try. What could that mean? Okay. Here's the thing, dude, Tim has ideas, and he goes, this is going to go viral. He calls me the other day, and he goes, dude, I have an idea that's going to go viral. Tim, this is not, this is not going to go viral. I think it is. I think it is. Also, I can't wait for the clips. You're not in. It's just me back and forth with the laughing thing. Okay. Do you want to continue the episode like this? 100%. I just want to run the whole, I want to do a full episode like this. Yeah, I want it. Am I supposed to look at you? Yes. Yes. There's no. No. Come on. Okay. When you say it's fully functional, I took out the centerpiece because it was the weight was a little weird. Yeah. I just see it. I see that there's a tongue in there. No. Is it a CPR dummy? I did. Have you put your mouth on it? I have not. I have this thing CPR. I haven't tested it out yet. Where did you get? What is it? Yes. Okay. Where did you get the, is there a camera on you at all? No. Yes. I'm sitting right next to you. Okay. No. So this was a Facebook ad that I was like, hey, this would be funny. I bought a new laptop. He had to have a laptop. I was going to say it's on recovery mode. Did you do that on purpose? No. My laptop is over here. My laptop is over here. Yeah. I just switched it to it. Okay. But it is on recovery mode. This laptop is not functional. Yeah. It's a new laptop. I bought it for the bit. All right. Let's see. No. Don't actually do anything on that. Oh. Oh, I'm not allowed to do viral bits. I think it would be really funny if I signed into this laptop and you're unable to, and now it's claimed on my iCloud account. I think that would go viral. I think that will go viral. So dumb. We're going to do this for the whole episode. Yeah. That's funny. Okay. All right. Can I have that Celsius at least? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Have Alex Brandoble so you're not on camera. I'm joking. Tim, bring it up. All right. So you're laughing at the fact that all of the social media clips for this episode are going to be, we're going to do a dummy. Okay. Tim, you know that I'm the one who looks crazy. Okay. Oh man. Okay. So the salad oil scandal. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's probably best to start with Tony. Tino. Tino, you're right. You're right. Sorry. Tino. It is weird. His name's Anthony. But he goes my Tino instead of Tony. I don't think that's weird. I don't think that's weird. I wasn't that. Was Tino one of the characters and was that was that uncle, was it uncle Tino? Is that a thing? Tito. Tito. Yeah. Tito means uncle. That makes way more sense. I put it together. I'm looking at Alex right now. Okay. Um, no. He, uh, we've been funny if you brought a curtain. So I couldn't, I literally couldn't see you at all. Yeah. I wanted to find a ways for me to be. Oh, it could have just put you in the other room. Oh, you could have been in the other studio, dude. Oh, that would have been funny. Dang. Funny. Should have thought of that. Yeah. You should have tried this again. This is why you should include me in ideas because. If I'm just not. Because all I did was tell him it was a dumb idea. You did try though. You did try. Okay. Okay. You did. So as long as I'm for YouTube watchers, you're hearing three voices. And it's just me on camera. This one. Well, it's me. I'm on camera. You can see me. My mouth is open. You're here. We're covering a laptop. Okay. Well, okay. So Tino. Yeah. I think I think I can place the start. Yeah. Yeah. I think I just 16. He started working in the meat packing industry. Right. This isn't like the. I think at this point it would have been the 40s, late 30s. Don't touch me. Sorry. That was me disrupting your boundaries. That was really interesting. Hey. I appreciate that. Sorry. My arms don't work right now. No, yeah. I think it's like late 30s. He started working in the meat packing. The age of 16, young guy. And he actually like applied himself to the good job. Starts like excelling through the ranks. Okay. And ends up running his own company called Goble. And Goble is a meat packing company. And in, let me check the year here. Get this year right. In 1946, the United States passed the National School Lunch Act. And you probably heard of this. This is the original. Yeah. I've heard of the school lunch program. Yeah. This is the original legislation that made the school lunch program. I know you went to like a different school. But did you guys didn't have like public school lunch, huh? No, actually. Right. And there were two days that I would actually eat. Because I would usually they bring my food from home or I would go to like the. There was like a, you know, snack bar instead of getting food from the. Oh, yeah. It was pizza day. That little rectangle pizza thing. Yeah. Which now look back, I wouldn't eat that now. That's crazy. Yeah. And then chili crispy dough day. What? Chili crispy dough. Yeah. I have no idea what a crispy dough is. Crispy dough is like, you know, it's like it's beef inside of a little tortilla. But it's like, it's crispy. It's a crispy dough. A crispy burrito. Kind of. Is it a chimichanga? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's not like, it's not like a burrito-sized thing. It's like, it's like a. It's a quito. Yeah, but somewhere between a burrito and a quito. Okay. So it's a crispy dough. Got it. And, you know, they put the chili on top. I, you know what I thought actually was I used to eat cans of chili just straight up just, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not that crazy. No. Jeez, no. But like I thought about this today. I was on my flight and I was like, oh, maybe I'll stop and get some lunch. And I was like, what can I get for the, if I just eat dinner at the hotel tonight? And I was like, oh, they sell those cans, they sell cans of chili at the hotel. And I used to pull a bowl out, open the can like dog food and go and it would be like shaped like the can. Yeah. And then I would just heat that up and eat it. Yeah. After looking at it, shaped like the, you know what I'm saying? Oh, that's a little crazy. There's just stuff that like I was trying to think before I left today. Oh, that's what I was talking to my wife about is we were talking about not like experimental drugs. That sounds crazy. But like, you know, there's different GLP ones coming out. That kind of stuff. I'm interested. You know, I'm interested if I can keep my muscle mass because I don't know because I mean the audio listener. You can't tell. Tim's a dummy and I'm jazz and, uh, but I don't, I've genuine fear is like, I don't want to go do a GLP one because I, you know, I could probably lose 45, 50 pounds, but I don't want to lose my muscle mass because I am big. And so I was talking about wife about how I would do experimental. She's like, do you think like all these medications are to come out with like, they're going to fix most of the stuff that's wrong with people by the time that we're old? And I was like, yeah. And she goes, aren't you worried about side effects and stuff? And I go, Reagan, the stuff I used to put into my body as a 400 pound guy, I'm not worried about anything for the rest of my life. If I don't know what I, if I survived putting cool ranch Doritos and purple gatorade and a sprite into my stomach at the same, I would put the sprite and the gatorade together because I was athletic. I could, I could do like 64 ounces. I can do, I should try to steroids. Maybe. Yeah. I've been thinking about it. Anyway, I switched from canned chili to steroids is what I'm saying. I've gone a different way. It's a different kind of synthetic material that you're pumping into your system. True. It's interesting to bring this up. I've actually been really dying to talk to you about this, but I've never thought of it when we were talking. Okay. I saw a paper recently that was talking about GLP ones and the impact it has on like, there is a side effect of like anxiety and depression that can happen in some individuals with GLP ones. Yeah. But what they've noticed is that it's balanced out. Well, what they've noticed is that that impact depends on where you're at when you start the GLP one. And so if you are, what do you mean where you're at? Like weight. So if you're overrate when you start the GLP one, then it doesn't have an impact on you don't have the side effect. But if you are at a healthy weight, you don't, that side effect skyrockets. Well, yeah, because you shouldn't be taking a GLP one if you're at a healthy, at a healthy weight. Well, what they said, that's really interesting, is the way it functions, and it's been a minute since I've read this. So I might be a little bit foggy on the details. But I'm sorry. You're right. I got a computer right in front of me. Yeah. Just look it up. Oh crap. It needs to be factory reset. No, the way it works is it's like a dopamine blocker, essentially. And so it's preventing you from getting that hunger hormone. Well, that's the way some of them work. Yeah. Otherwise, that's the thing. It's like some of them work in different ways. Yeah. But yeah, keep going. And so that's one of the parts. That's the other thing. The other thing is like, if you have an addiction, GLP ones are actually like curbing the addiction in other areas, not just in food, but in like smoking, alcohol, other drugs, because of that hormone that it's blocking. But if you're a healthy individual and you have no addictive tendencies, it's just blocking your regular dopamine. Oh, I see. And so if you have some other addiction that's curbing, or if you were overweight and you lost a lot of weight, you are getting a dopamine burst from losing that weight or from the benefits. Yeah. Or from curbing the addiction that you were facing. But if you were already healthy, weren't facing anything, you're having the benefits. And so then because of that, you're just all of a sudden like down in the dots. Yeah. I've actually been considering taking up smoking to lose weight and then going on a GLP warned to quit smoking. That's a good idea, actually. Yeah. Yeah. You're thinking, that's that's chess. That's big brain stuff. I don't want to lose this. I don't want to lose this. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to lose my muscle. I got to start smoking cigarettes to maintain, you know what I'm saying? I got to smoke a bag of marble to maintain my gains. Okay. Anyways, I don't know if I've showed you a picture of Tito yet. No. No. Oh, this is a mafia story. I don't, he looks very mafia. I don't know if he is mafia. He looks very mafia. He looks. He looks. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. The story is 1940. Yeah. When he's working for Goble. Black and white photos. This picture goes really hard. Yeah, dude. Heck. Yeah. I could play this guy if I don't go on a GLP one. You're right. He's short, though. He's very small. You don't have to cut your sleeves out. Yeah. If you don't see the camera. It freaks me out of this corner, I know. By the way. It has. I set this up. It's up. Briang cordial antibus. I've been here all I have been set up all day. It's like in the reflection area, compared to everyone's expectations. It's happened a few times when I've left the room and I came back. and I came back and I'm like, oh, you're here. And it wasn't you, it was, it was dummy me. And this dummy saw all those bits I was doing on the way in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he did. Dang. Dang. Yeah, that's for this photo, he's wearing like a 19th, I mean, Winston Churchill outfit, you know, the big switch coat with a suit and a tie. Like, this is how men use it. Okay, this is how men use a dress. And here's the thing, women will be constantly watch Victorian era shows, or like they'll read these novels and they'll be like, why can't men dress like this anymore? I want you to seriously think about the last time you saw a person in this time, dress like that. What did you think about him? What did you think about that guy wearing the Fedora? Did you think, oh, he's bringing back old style that I like a lot? Or did you think, this guy's got a yo-yo collection. He can't want to show me, you know? I bet this guy would love to show me all his sharpened swords at his house. This guy has many little pony TVs. This guy's a brony. Yeah, I know the lingo. Yes, I do know what grown men who are into my little pony are called. And don't ask me why. Anyways, so. That's going to go viral. Okay, so Tito, he had this company called Global. Tino. And Global was a meat packing company. Yes. And the United States pushed. How's Global spelled? G-O-B-E-L. Okay, that's fine. And. It's gonna say 1940s tough time. Tough time being global. Throwin' around global. And so the school lunch box came out and he saw this as an opportunity. And he was like, oh, I can get the contract for that. Exactly. And so he went forward and. Okay. Long story short to make a long story short. He essentially just went to the government and overcharged them for the meat. And so he made off of this hold on the meat. Let me see this real quick. Let me scroll up. He made a. A government contractor invoicing the government for more than the product is actually worth. This is a scandal. So he sold them two million pounds worth of meat. And he charged on each like pound. I don't know about each shipment. Tens of thousands more than it was worth. So I don't know exactly how much he made. He extorted the government. Yeah, he was extorting them. He also, and I don't know how he pulled this off. I can't find any details on this. But. Which means he really extorted the public. That's just bad behavior in general. Yeah. You know, I mean, like obviously like extorting someone or like charging way more overcharging is already like unethical. But, you know, some people are like, oh, but it's the government. Take it. You know, and you're like, yeah, but that's you. Well, that's us. We are the government. That's in this country. We are the government. Yeah. And so, and also in this instance, it's the children. It's literally the ceiling from the children. And he also, and again, I don't know how he was doing this, but this was unexpected substandard meat is what this says in quotes in all the articles about it. Unexpected substandard meat. Yeah. And so he was selling kid all this like basically rotten meat. Okay. Hey, one of years later, same problem. So. I mean, what has changed? I actually love this deal. And so. So I should get a puppet of myself. What? And then we, I should get up. I heard that. That's why I was like, why did you interrupt me to say what? Well, I heard what I said. I should get a puppet of myself. Yeah. So that way, this dummy can sit here and then I can just be a puppet. I have for a long time wanted to do an episode. I think we should do with ourselves. If you're going to, if you're willing to drop money on a CPR, dummy, I think we can afford some puppets. I have, I may or may not have contacted puppet builders. Yeah. Yeah. To figure out how much it cost to have them look like us. Yeah. And that's something we need to put some money away each month to save up for. I'm okay with that. Yeah. This is our Dave Ramsey bags. Yeah. This is our envelope. This is our puppet envelope. And every month, we put $25 in that. So. Yeah. And so yeah, if you want us to have, if you want, join us on Patreon, our puppet tier, our puppet tier. That's our puppet tier. Wow. If you want to see that was a really good segue, Tim. I'm glad you brought that up. Yeah. Thanks. Wow. Now back to the story. Hey, we just produced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live hangout. You get to join the discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so, but also, you know, the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, like, what, you know, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. No. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody you like the show. And thanks for being here for this episode. If so, so Tino's company, the, the Securities Exchange Commission caught on to what he was doing. And long story short, they faced a bunch of legal problems, ended up going bankrupt. Goal. Yeah. What's really interesting is, I don't know if this was a symptom of the day, or I don't know what it was. But for some reason, goble, or goble closed, goble went, went bankrupt, but dangerous. He was able to just go start another company. So he started up another company called Allied. Sure. And Allied, let's see, Allied was a crude vegetable oil company. So Allied crude vegetable oil refining corp in 1955. And what this was doing in the 1950s, soybean oil boomed. There was a big, big boom in soybeans. And it was such a big deal that even, like Henry Ford was getting in the game. And so it was kind of like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Honestly, the way I get out of the soybean game, I've seen it described like, like if a time traveler ended up in 2009, yeah, someone will be like, you got, you know, a big coin. Yeah, exactly. But if a time traveler ended up in 1947, he'd be like, you got to get on soybean oil. You got to get some soybeans, yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah. And so Henry Ford was buying them up all the big, all the big name investors, all the big name people on Wall Street were buying soybean futures. And and soybean, just like giant tanks of soybeans to store off in facilities and places. Because soybeans, we, the reason that's happened is we found a new way to refine soybean oil. And that we found ways that that could be used in a lot of different things. And so there were style of dressings, but there's also people who are returning them into plastics, people who were trying to figure out ways to make them into fuel. And so this was a huge, like economy was coming out of this, this commodity. And so he saw an opportunity here. And what he did is he bought a million pounds of soybean oil, and he, in New Jersey through allied started up a big refinery. And he bought these, these oil tankers. And so this is not his oil tanks, this is just an example I found online, but these huge massive oil tankers. I'm just now realizing that your eyes turning toward the screen are usually my cue to do that. So you were talking and I had to be like, oh, there's an image up there. So just giant oil tanks, because your eyes were closed, I can't open your eyes when you talk. Am I dreaming? I can't open my eyes when you talk. It's a dream. I'm dreaming right now. Yeah, so he got these big things to fill completely with soybean oil, and he got dozens of these tanks. So it's a huge facility, but dozens of these tanks. Yeah. And specifically, the reason he got into this was he found that soybean futures were moving on the market. You understand what a future is? Maybe for the listener. It's a listener to explain the future contract. Yeah, go ahead. Essentially what a future contract does is it allows you to buy and lock in a price for a commodity today no matter what price it hits in the future. And so if say soybean are actually a really good example, earlier today, I went to Quick Trip. It was about lunch, a clock. I went to Quick Trip. It was about lunch, a clock. I went to Quick Trip at lunch, and I filled up my tank. And I noticed when I did this, because here in Francine City, the price that I looked to to say gas is expensive is $4 gallon. If we go over $4, I'm like, oh, dang, we're in the officially expensive area. $4 gallons. $4 gallons. Below anything below $3, I feel good about, but $4 is where I'm like, dang. I live in Los Angeles, California. What are you paying right now? $5.80. Dang. That's brutal. Yeah. But I. Yeah. But you can afford it when you're jacked. And full of soybean oil, dude. Actually, my Honda Civic runs on soybeans. Oh, there you go. Yeah. So when I went at lunch time, it was literally like right at noon. I filled up my tank, and it was $357 gallon. Went home, ate some lunch, got some work done, left at about, left at about two o'clock. Yeah. And I drove by that same Quick Trip, and it was $4.29 a gallon. It jumped 70 cents. Uh, no, that's like a little over 30. It jumped 30 cents. Yeah. What say the numbers again? It was, uh, let's play it back. You're right. I said the wrong thing. Am I crazy? Am I crazy? Because he said $357 earlier. I've had $3.97. He went $357. I did say $357. I was thinking of the $357 magnum. No, you don't. I did say $357. But I was thinking of the $357 magnum. No, you don't mediate. It jumped 30 cents. And uh, you guys gotta know that this, this, this happens way more when we're just on the phone. Well, Jared usually says dumb things. Jared doesn't say dumb things. That's not one of Jared's attributes. And you're building your character says dumb things a lot. That's one of the choices. Why is this a choice? Yeah, he just doesn't know. No, it was $397. $397. 12 by two hours later. Still. Still. Still dramatic. Yeah, a huge jump. 32 cent increase. Yeah. And so if I was buying a futures contract and I was like, I'm not going to buy gas right now. But I may need gas in the future. I could buy a future contract. $397. Maybe $397 rate. Probably should have tried to get it when it was $357. That was a better deal. It was $70 cents cheaper. White cheaper. And so I can lock in that price and know that, okay, whenever I want to buy this in the future, this is the price I paid for it. I got it at this price. But the thing about a futures contract is if the price goes up, like when it went to $429, I could then sell that to other people and other people are seeing it moving and it becomes like an investment. People are saying, oh, this is moving up. I want to get in while it's moving up. Because you could sell it at whatever it's currently like, so you could buy. Let's say you bought 10 gallons at $397 for $39.70. Yes. So then when it's crawling up towards $429, you would sell it at $415 for $4150 and make a profit. Make a huge amount of profit. That's what I'm like. What does that like? It's like $76. No, but the idea is obviously you're buying in bulk, you're buying millions of dollars worth of these futures. So a little bit of movement of $0.30 on a commodity, you're profiting $100,000. So he wanted to do this with soybean futures and his idea was I want to corner the market. Because if I can become the largest mover in the market, I can just dictate how much this is worth. I can make movements with my own soybean future contracts. And then when I want it to go up, it goes up because I have control over the market. The problem is he doesn't have enough money to buy the majority of the market. The only way to corner the market is to buy up the entire market. Yeah, exactly. And so he has to come up with a way to do this. So what he does is he says, well, I can buy it on credit. But here's the thing. I have kind of a bad name from the whole fraud thing I did. And so he says, there is this thing, there's a company called Amax, American Express. And they have a warehousing division at the time. Which is interesting. I don't know. Do you know where American Express came from? Isn't it the wagons? Yeah, that's exactly right, actually. Yeah. Yeah. So they were kind of almost. You know why I know that? Because you're a member. Yeah. Because when I go to the lounge, I think the whole backstory is like on the wall. Genuinely, that's why I know that, right? It's like, it's like, oh, yeah, because it was a travel company. Yeah. What's your member? How long have you been a member? Isn't that on the card member since? Yeah. No, I didn't know if I had my card on it. Isn't that on the front of the card? Yeah, since 2021. Oh, yeah. So you've been around. Yeah. So I don't make me pay anymore. Really? Yeah. I just racked up a giant number. And then I call. And they're like, hey, we're sorry. You don't have to pay. Genuinely, you can do that, though. If you have a relationship with them, at least on the business card, because business dips and ebbs and flows and some months are big, some months are low, you can just call them and be like, hey, invoices, I'm waiting, no, I gotta, you can be like, I got a couple of Matt 90s out. Yeah. And they're like, okay. Well, think about it. I know. That's unique to a lot of other creditors out there. Like they make money off of credit, but the way they're making money is off of fees at the merchant. Right. They're making money off of your purchases, not off of your, which is unique to MX. So the way it started was they realized during the gold rush that there was all these people going out to the west for the gold rush and you've got to go all the way out there for the gold. These soybeans are right here. Well, they went all the way out to the west and they realized a lot of people's wagons were breaking down. This is MX. Yeah. And because of that, it sunk a lot of people, even people who found gold and tried to bring it back, they were getting robbed and they were losing everything. So were they trying to set like travel stations? So essentially what MX was was, it was kind of like insurance. And so they basically backed your whole wagon. And they said, your wagon was worth this much. If anything happens, we'll pay you back what you lost. And you just paid a fee for that. And so it literally was basically insurance. And years later, they got into doing travelers checks. Right. That's what I thought of the financial industry and kind of became what they do today. But in the early days, they were kind of a trust company. The idea was like, we make it to where you can trust that this company is good on whatever they're doing. And the warehouse division was kind of a relic of that era of the company. So what the warehouse division of MX did, it was a completely separate LLC under the umbrella of MX. Sure. And what it did is it would go into warehouses of companies and it would verify your inventory. Okay. Then kind of the same thing, but okay, your inventory is worth this, so we'll back it up to this. Yeah. And then there would be this basically a receipt with MX's name on it that says MX verifies that this company has as much inventory as they're claiming to have. Oh. So the reason that this was valuable to them is now they had a more trusted name. Yeah. They had MX vouching for them so they could then go to other banks and use their inventory as collateral to get loans. Got it. And the reason that this worked for them is because Tino had an idea and Tino said, here's the thing. I got these giant tanks. They're huge, huge tanks. I could. Oh, I know exactly what's going to happen here. Here's the thing about oil. It doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't mix. So he can fill it. It's 90% with water. Yeah. Here's the thing. I like whenever I know the scam. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And so he pumps in. Yeah. See water and fills these exactly like 99% with water. Yeah. A little layer of water. A little layer of oil on top. Yep. Yep. That's unfortunately. So when the MX auditor comes pretty good, they look in the tank and it's full of the top with oil. But here's the thing, technically speaking, they're supposed to look like, I mean, how do you go? That's oil. Oh, it's soybean. It's something. I have an MX decree that this is full of soybean oil. They had like, they'd like say it like that. They had experts. They knew. They're going to silo to silo just. Yeah. Yeah. So they're supposed to do what they were, what the job description was was that it would show up on random intervals and they would come in and they would climb to the top and they had essentially basically like think like a tape measure. Yeah. And they would drop to the bottom. And so they could see how far down it went and then they would pull it up and it'd be like a dipstick. So you could see it's the same liquid. Obviously. If you put enough oil there though, it goes through and then you're going to pull it through that layer of oil. Yeah. Well, since it doesn't mix, you would still, you could still see that there was something else in there. And so you would know it's adulterated. The problem was these MX workers, like this was such a routine for them that a lot of times the employees at Tino's company, at Allied, would just be like, hey, we'll run the stick for you. And they would drop it and they'd be like, yep, it's at 98%. And the guy would just check his check mark. And then they realized I certify that it's at 98%. So here's what I'm saying, man. People are like, people who stay just don't want to work. They've never wanted to work. No one has ever done their job 100%. These are people in the 40s who are just like, yeah, you guys do it. I was like 50s. These are people in the 50s. Sorry, I can reset it for the clip that could potentially go viral. These are people in the 50s who are just like, why don't you do it? Why don't you do it? All right. And that was MX, dude. Yeah. Their name meant something. MX stands for American Express. Why do you know that? How do you know that? So actually, I'm like I go to the centurion lounge. And it's like on the wall actually. So I also know from the calls I get that are like, Hey, your American express balance is pretty high. That's what they said. They said it's. Boy, it's the AI voice. Yeah. It's like an AI voice, dude. It's like, hi, your American Express Balance is pretty high. I'm like, what the heck? Yeah, you might want to get on top of that sometime soon. I want to pay your bills. For payment options. Really funny bits we're doing here. I love the banter. You're right. Oh boy, am I sick? I sure do need. Tim's don't get well quick trick. And what is it? It's simply chug an entire gallon of orange juice. Wow. I forgot. And then this shirt reminded me. I'm so glad that I have this shirt as a public service announcement, a public health service to other people around me. Do your part. Get this shirt shop.tillin.com. No, but he also realized though is he realized, oh, wait a second. These guys, they only come on Fridays. They keep a really strict schedule. And so he had his team build a complex system of pipes underground pipes that will pump the oil between these tanks. And so he only needed that one percent of oil. Oh my gosh. And then they would check a tank. At a certain point, the effort to pull off a scam is just like, dude, put that effort into doing something. For real. For real though, actually. You know, like the effort and now people do this for content. The lengths that they'll go. The money they'll spend to try to create a viral clip. Yeah. And it's like, dude, if you would just put this amount of effort into the other parts of our show. Are you trying to insinuate something here? No, I'm not saying anything. Yeah. I don't know if you tried to like. I'm not saying anything now. Please. On ironically, the clip that was the hardest is you going. Are you choking? You need. That's honestly stiffer than I thought it was going to be. Why? There's sandbags at the bottom. But I'm holding it down. I got sandbags told the down. It was fought over in our in our screen desks. So I need sandbags. This is a professional set and it requires sandbags. So Alex is not union by the way. No, so he ends up. Thank you. Hey, hold on. Still bald. Still got a shiny forehead. Love the commitment to the bit. So he. So they would pump the. They don't make it hot anymore. Yeah, this is what CBR dummies look like now. They used to like kind of try to make them look a little more lively. They put some lipstick on them. They don't. They don't make them hot anymore, you know. But I learned CBR. They make these. Back when I learned CBR. These things were nice. You know. But I learned CBR. I wanted to put your mouth on it. Say that was. I was like the highlight of my PE class. I was like, oh, we get to. We get to kiss them. Oh, we got the WCPR today. You know. No, Jen, you don't get to kiss it. Well, dude, it's it's problematic. Kids like me be like kids. They're like, we gotta. We gotta make these things less hot. The dummies are too hot. No reason for these CBR dummies to be this attract. A bit that's questionable, but we'll leave it in. So. And they would show up on Friday. They would know what tank they would start out. Uh huh. They would check that tank. And then the second they would finish checking that tank, they'd start pumping the oil to the other tank. And because it floated, it was just way too much effort. And then they would just kind of chop it up with the guy. Then they'd get the other tank and the oil would already be transferred. And you know that guy. The inspector hated going to that location. Oh, they're so chatty. They always talk. And so, you know, what's that mean? It's the 1950 crazy thing about the World War II, huh? That was wild. Yeah. So kids are thing, man. I don't want to be weird, but. You know, did you. Did you let CPR. And what. Wait. Wait. Why did you think of the dummies? They had your school, huh? Pretty. No, I mean, we also had a ghost at ours. We had, you know, there was some, I'll go dummies. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Oh, it looks like we're done. Hey, go in the second one. Hey, look at the next one. And after that, he's like, so about what I said earlier. I don't know something to say. I know that was a weird thing to say. And I just wanted to say, I'm. I would really appreciate it if. If you would just kind of forget about the whole thing. Yeah. That's yourself. Forget about it. You're not. No one started it. No one. I'm saying no one said that. He started. Forget about it. Because he was so weird. He said a weird thing. Oh, that was CPR. I'm going to be gone. Yeah. Forget about it. Um. So. Okay. So. Okay. So. And then they would just go from tank to tank. And that's how they legitimize it. That's crazy. So they had in total a million pounds of soybean oil. But they had through this scheme. So they have a million pounds. They have a million pounds. What are they claiming that they have? So through this scheme, they end up getting warehouse receipts to verify from American Express that they have 1.8 billion pounds of oil in their facility. And then they use that receipt to go use as collateral. Yeah. Which allowed them to get $180 million with the loans. Oh my gosh. Which, the interesting thing about this is the USDA had actually had a national inventory of how much soybean oil was in the United States at the time. And they were like, nobody else has that much. Nobody went to verify it. I mean, I guess. Because because the 1.8 billion pounds of oil was way more than the U.S. had in their entire inventory. So, but nobody, nobody an analyst was like, hey, we should go check the inventory at the USDA. Yeah. But I mean, like, do you know how much do you know how much soybean oil exists in the United States right now? No clue. Yeah. It's not your job to know that. Yeah. But like somebody at AMX is just like, I mean, we had somebody go out and do it. They look at it. Yeah. I mean, but you would think if your job is to verify that that warehouse had the inventory that they claim they had. Yeah, but they did. That I mean. They went out there. They tested the thing. That's what I'm saying. They went out. They got, they got conned. Yeah. I suppose. I suppose. I mean, the time I used to pose, you just wouldn't, we just spent, we just spent the last like 15 minutes going into detail about how they scammed them. And then you're like, yeah, they didn't even go out there to verify it. You literally told me they did. I mean, they did verify it. But I, but I'm what I'm saying is like, they probably should have like checked with the USDA to see what's available. It was suspicious. They probably should have been like, this seems odd. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. I think that's a fair thing to say. But for you to be like, yeah, nobody checked. Nobody checked against what they knew the available national inventory was. That's what I'm saying. That's what I mean. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I go and then they show me a room that has to go to the bully balls to whom this is two million bowling balls. That's crazy. Yeah. And then you go, hey, there's not even that many bowling balls in existence. I go, I did. Why would I know that? Well, I saw them. I saw the bowling balls. I'd be like, well, I went there. I was asking balls painted to look like bowling balls. Okay. But I went as verified. I talked to this chatty guy who said some really weird stuff about CPR dummies. And then was like, we look at all two million bowling balls. Why would I know? Why would I know that that was fake? Also, why would I be like, maybe I should see? I guess you're right. You know, you're right. That's fine. I'm just trying to have sympathy for someone who's definitely dead now. So he did. You're, you're ragging on a person in the 50s. You're right. That person is dead by now. You're right. You're right. And I say him because women have jobs in the 50s. I don't think so. All right. But they took out a hundred and this wouldn't have happened if they did. Let's be clear. So they took out a hundred and eighty million dollars with the loans. They keep looking at the clock. I'll let you keep going. They took out a hundred and eighty million dollars with the loans. Which today adjusted for inflation 2.2 and a half billion. Wow. So a lot of. That's at least 70 cents more. A lot of money. And then they bought 90% of the available soybean futures on the New York Stock Exchange. So not only did he corner of the market, but he had like the market basically. Yeah. At that much. And so this worked great for him. For a while made literal millions of dollars off of this scheme. And he could have stopped. Right. Like at that point, he made the money. He could have stopped. Right. Yeah. He could have sold. I mean, he would have had to like very slowly sell that to avoid a panic. And so he would have had to like rip those futures out. Sure. Sure. But he could have got out. Okay. But the commodity exchange authority started seeing this and thought it was strange. So they started probing. And they started to see some things that looked like they were probably fraud. And so this report comes out that basically says that like the price of these futures are overpriced. Sure. So it triggers kind of a run which long story short. He had invested, like he had pulled these loans from 51 different banks. I don't know if I said that yet. Yeah, you do. And so this run basically made it to where the value of these futures got slashed by half overnight. And so now he's in a point where all these banks are looking at the collateral and they're saying, oh, hey, we need to make margin calls on these futures. Yeah. So what that is is basically when you have to pay for what you locked in your price for. Right. The problem is he doesn't have that money because he doesn't have that collateral. So the banks start going to try to actually have the soybean oil. Yeah. So the banks go calling on the loan to try to get that, but he doesn't have anything. Yeah. And so what happens here is two banks on on November 19th, the panic starts. November 1963, the panic starts. Okay. On November 21st, 1963, two brokerage houses. Ira Hoptonco and Williston and Bean fold because of this. Yeah. And so, and it looks like more banks are probably going to fold. And so this is starting to become like this, this big wave that looks like it's going to like potentially cause like a massive stock crash. Sure. In like 1930s level, like depression, sort of situation. Sure. And then on Friday, something happens. On Friday, November 22nd at 111 p.m., President John F. Kennedy was shot and killed in Dallas. And this took over the new cycle, obviously. And so the stock exchange, there was a quick run on the stock exchange because everyone saw this and so everything got right. And so the stock exchange, the New York Stock Exchange closed. They were like, we have to shut down to prevent what's happening, right? To prevent a full run on the entire stock market. Oh. Because this was a Friday, the stock exchange didn't open until Monday. So it gave them time to figure out what they were going to do. And so eventually, so essentially what the stock exchange decided is they looked at this whole situation. And they said, okay, hey, we're going to make it through the weekend on the JFK assassination. We're going to come back Monday. All of that has been worked out. We don't think that this is going to be a problem. But this whole thing with the soybean futures is going to still be a problem. Right. And we need to figure out what we're going to do about all these banks. And so the stock exchange, by itself, they essentially went and they taxed every member of the New York Stock Exchange to cover the cost for the banks and to pay back the loans that he had taken out to prevent the stock exchange from crashing. And so this was like the from the brink of like a depression style crash. Yes. And JFK being assassinated, but the stock exchange enough time to come up with a solution, the solution was to bail out the banks with the company's money from all the member stock exchange companies. Okay. And so they essentially taxed the companies to pay for that loss. And it prevented this from turning into an even bigger disaster than we could have even imagined what would have happened. Which is bananas in and of itself. Right. But the other thing that happened in this was Amix's warehouse division goes bankrupt. And so Amix opens. And Amix, there's a run on the stock stock. The stock price goes from I think it was 56 the week before 30 and then on Monday, they open at $37 and it just keeps plumbing. And so their stock is getting killed. Yeah. And this is a moment where a young guy who had been watching the market for a good opportunity to get into the market and find some success saw this, saw what Amix was recognized that people were still using their green cards. Those were out in in the world already the credit business, the travel checks were still a thing. It was just the warehouse company that was bad. And so he said, I'm going to buy up a majority stock in Amix and build my fortune. And that's exactly what he did. And that was Warren Buffett. I knew it. Yeah. And he is the majority shareholder of Amix to this day. And that was the play. Really? Yeah. And that was the play that made Warren Buffett who Warren Buffett became was this win. This was his first big win fall. Wow. Not only the amount of chain reaction that came out of this is kind of bananas and the amount of things like. Did Tino get in trouble then? Oh. Yeah. He did. He got a seven year sentence. He got out in three years. So they caught him. They figured out that he had lost. Oh, yeah. They knew for sure. Yeah. They were like, oh, it's obviously the lie. They're like, what do you mean you don't have the inventory? You have 1.8 billion gallons of or pounds of and he was like, yeah. Yeah. You're right. I do have that. Yeah. He goes to prison and lies in prison. He says he's a changed man. He said, this is the thing I needed. Came out was a pastor. Yeah. He's like, this is exactly what I needed. I knew like, I needed something to change my life. I also need that by the way. I also need something to turn it around. You know, send me to prison. And so he goes, he goes to prison and he says, he says he'll be clean after this. He comes out prison and he immediately starts. He immediately starts scamming. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He gets into another con basically doing the same thing with cattle. And then he gets caught again for that. I would love for you to describe how he does the same thing with cattle. Well, he had a silo full of cows. And then he would go, look at the silo. He was like, that's full of cows. You know, and then he'd come back down. And he'd be like, hey, so when you was growing up, and you're schooled, they have like a hot dummy. And then while they're talking, all the cattle are being sucked through a tube into the next silo. What do you mean you did the same thing with cattle? I mean, it wasn't. We don't have time. It wasn't functionally the same. We're out of time. What I forget about it. It wasn't functionally the same. But what I'm saying is like he was doing another scheme with cattle. Okay. Yeah. It's crazy how long this episode was. We have to go. You're right. You're right. You're right. What else happens? Are there anything else we need to cover? No, I think that covers it. That's about the guy who used soybeans. Are you okay? It's an original soy boy. You look like you're... I do feel a little weird. Are you okay? I... Oh my hand. My hand's falling off. I... I don't think... I can breathe just fine. It's more than anything. Don't kiss me. You're weird. Get your hands out of my mouth. I'm not dead. Stop crying. Quit crying. You coward. And save me. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Hey, thanks for listening and watching this episode of Things Are Long Last Night. I hope that you don't judge our whole show on this one. But if you want to see what the show usually looks like, it's me and this dummy talking about Barry Minkal, a guy who did the kind of a same scam He had a silo full of vacuums, and then he pushed that over to the other silo, and that's how he scanned people No, it's better than that. Also join us on Patreon so we can afford to buy more dummies and potentially puppets If that doesn't interest you, if you're like, wow, I really don't want you guys to be able to grow that way Then please continue to not share this show with your friends. That would really help us not grow up Tell you that. So we'll see you next week on Things I Learned Last Night and we anything else you want to say Tim? Jiren is so much more handsome than I am Jiren's a big strong man, and I am a little bald boy Wow Tim, that's really that's really sad. Well, I am sad. Yeah Yeah, is there anything else you want to say? I think I think Bree should leave me and take Archer and run far away And I've told her that a lot. Yeah Okay, all right. We'll tell them you'll see them next week. I'm still doing this Yeah I thought it was just fine You


In November 1963, a vegetable oil company in Bayonne, New Jersey, triggered a financial crisis that nearly crashed the New York Stock Exchange. The man behind it was Anthony De Angelis, known as Tino, who had convinced banks and American Express that he controlled more soybean oil than existed in the entire United States. The collateral behind roughly $180 million … Read More

The Man Who Faked His Way Onto the 49ers | The Wide Deceiver Ep 348

10-20-26

Episode Transcription

Hey man, happy to be here. What's going on, brother? How you doing today? Today is a sunny morning Tuesday afternoon and a sunny morning, Tuesday afternoon. Today's weather is a high of 85 and a low of Tim Stowe. What's today's episode about? Have you ever heard of the wide deceiver? Oh, yeah, have I ever heard of the wide deceiver? You mean my ex-wife? Hey. What up, pop, pop, pop, pop, hey. You know what I'm saying? The energy that you've come in for the episode is crazy. You were, hey, I don't know, man. I'm trying my best. You're my wife. Yeah. Oh, you mean my ex-wife? No, the wide deceiver. Hey, I can't get no respect. Crazy. Oh, my mom is like a bad chef. Oh, actually, she made dino nuggets. You know I'm getting caught. But you do enjoy lying. There's kind of a thrill of like... Would you have it? Well, I'd have. What? Things I learned last night. No, wide deceiver. Wide deceiver. The wide deceiver. It is this guy. His name is... Is this the football player who got catfished for a bunch of money? Um, you remember that? Yeah, catfished for a bunch of money. This is, uh, Dejan Love. De... Okay. You can't see his face there. Dejan Love. What's he... Yeah, he's just saucy. He didn't like on Twitter. What is that face? I don't know what that means. So for, uh, for listeners, he's a 49ers player it looks like. Yeah. And he had a 49ers helmet and, uh... And he's got the SF headband and the shirt. He's outside of the stadium. It looks like? Yeah, that's why stadium in the background. Okay. Yeah. So this is not the... You know what I was talking about, though. The NFL player got catfished. You got to know this story? I don't know. I don't know. Look up NFL player catfish, real quick. And this is a total side tangent. But this was like before the TV show catfish became a thing. So I think this might have been the catalyst for the show. Oh. Where... Where... Yes. Where his girlfriend had cancer... He was college football. He was... He was raising money on... Yes. For this cancer foundation. Yes. That didn't exist. Yes, yes, yes. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. That was 2012. You've been catfished. I've never been catfished, but I did get scammed recently. What? I think we've talked about it here. Who'd you get scammed by? Recent... The last summer I want to say, fresh off of archer being born. So I was like in a delirious state. I heard the news that they were filming Tedlasso in town. Oh, that's right. I heard the news that the house that it was all taking place that was like five minutes for my house. And so I was like, oh, that's crazy. And so I've been seeing all the stuff here and all about it. And then I saw a casting call for extras for this season of Tedlasso. And I was like, that'd be kind of fun. And so like I just applied for the casting call. And the first call was like a virtual. And I show up and it's like a Zoom call. And it was kind of like the admin. Like this is how it's going to work. Sure. There was like 100 some people in the call. You didn't pay for that call. No, I didn't pay for that call or anything. Yeah. But there's like 100 some odd people that were like all like... But there's like a... You're watching not like you're in the audience, you know? They kind of walk through how the whole thing works. And it was probably an hour of like, here's how everything's going to work. And then them being like... And we've got... This is for Tedlasso, but we've got a lot of opportunities. Yeah. So like modeling, extras and actual like acting roles and things. So I sit through this whole presentation. And then finally at the end, they're like, okay, so we're sending out a link now. And so here's what you do next. Like you've got to... You go in here, you're going to fill out the form. You're going to put all your information in and create your profile. And then it's a one time payment of $500. And then a monthly payment of $40 to be considered for all of our roles. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like a time share for extra opportunities. It felt like... Which is so- Which is so- Yeah. Yeah. You should never pay to be part of those. That's great. I did not almost get scanned, but their email came through that was like, Hey, we want you to be on this podcast. And I liked the mess with them. So I emailed back and was like, great. Yeah, let me know. And they... So what they're trying to do, what they want to do is they want to get you... They say, hey, you're going to be on Berk Chrysler's podcast. And we're going to do it on Facebook Live, right? And you're like, oh, okay. Yeah. And, you know, none of this is real. And they... So they want to get you on a Zoom call. Yeah. So that you can log into Zoom and they can make sure your Facebook profile is set up correctly. Yeah. Right? Yep. And through that whole process, the way they're helping you set it up so that you can pair with them to go live is that you're giving them permission to take over your Facebook page. Take them on the access. And so then they take that over. They spend the money on your ad spend. And then they take over your... They lock you out of your account. And then they just start posting junk on your account and whatever. Yeah. And so I like to say, yeah, let's do the Zoom meeting tomorrow. Let's do three o'clock. And then in like three, 15, I'll check my email and they're like, hey, are you coming? And I go, oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. Gosh. Let's do... Let's do tonight. Yeah. And I will do this for as long as they will. And I have one guy on the hook for like a full week. Just like a couple weeks ago. I was just like, oh, dang, man. I'm so sorry. How about 10 a.m. tomorrow? You know? And then I'm also looking up what time in India is most inconvenient for this person? And so... Yeah, crazy. Yeah, they just... It's crazy. The number of scams are out there. It is insane. Especially like now. Like I feel like they were in like scam. Like a... Scam city, dude. Yeah, like it's... It's skyrocketing. It's like technically not a scam. It's technically legal. Like that college gig that happened to me where I... Oh, yeah. We booked the college gig. I said sure. Because it was near Kansas City. So we'd be flying. I would be doing a podcast anyway. I wasn't going to make a ton of money on it. But it was... It was a fine gig, you know? Yeah. And so we... And I assumed my day-to-day manager knew this. But like... I was like, hey, ask how much the college is paying for this. Yeah. They never did. And so I go out there. And the first thing I go, I ask, we're setting up the stuff. Hey, how much do you guys pay for this? And they told me a number that was more than double what I'm making. So what the person booking it does is they go, hey, their budget is 2000. Whatever. And then they tell the school it's 5000. And so they pocket that 3000 difference. Yep. And they come back to me and they go, yeah, the budget's too grand. And you're like, okay, that's fine. And so you go do the show. And they paid more than double for it. Yeah. And that's technically legal. Yeah. But we, you know, I hate that. Yeah. I hate that. And that's very common. Yeah. Very common. Yeah. That's interesting. This video just went viral yesterday that I saw or not yesterday a couple days ago. It was a podcast. They're both wearing masks. They're wearing ski masks. And she's talking about how she just got fired. And she got fired for corporate theft is what she said. She's an event planner, a corporate event planner. And what she was doing, which she was like, I thought this was like common practice in the industry. As everything they would play in the whole event. And for every line at them in the event, she'd add a couple hundred extra dollars to the invoice. And so she'd pad the cost. And then I don't know if she wasn't clear if this was like going back to the company or if she was taking it, skimming it. Skimming it. Yeah. She was fired. She was probably pocketing it. Yeah. She did mention that like she was, she would go on these, like to these events. And then she would get really nice dinners and things like that. Yeah. She had an expense account that maybe she was like drawing from that excess maybe as what was going on. But yeah, similar concept where it's just like you're just fluffing the numbers. So they're doing a podcast wearing ski masks, admitting to crimes. Is that the, is that the, is that the evolution of content that we're at now? Just to be clear. Yeah. You're like, why is this podcast? They're both wearing ski masks. You said that so normal. But it's like, yeah, they were just admitting the crimes they're doing. They're wearing ski masks, but they're in their living room and you can see all their family photos. Yeah, those family photos. Oh, dude, we should frame that guy. We should frame that guy. His wife reached out to us. We need to read, we need to email them back. Okay. That was years ago. I'm sure the email is the same. Hey, just got this. Five years later. Hey, I just saw this email. So the wide deceiver. The wide deceiver. So a couple of weeks ago, this video went viral. Dejan Love. Dejan Love. I don't think that sounds familiar. No, yeah. So he, this video went viral of him. How long has he played for the 49ers? He's pretty fresh, pretty fresh. Here's a video of him that went viral a couple of weeks ago of him running routes on the beach in San Francisco. Okay. And this went viral because a bunch of people... What? A bunch of people said what? What are you about to say? I don't think he's allowed to have his helmet. Is that what people are saying? Yeah. So this went viral because there's just a bunch of red flags in this video. Okay. So my first thought is equipment managers are not going to let you take your helmet. Your helmet to the beach. To the beach. Yeah, that is a little surprising. Okay. Okay. Doesn't look like he's ever pulled that before. Yeah. Trippin' on the sand, slowing down, catch. Who's he playing catch with? Who's friends with the NFL player who's throwing the ball like this? Yeah, the ball's not the tightest spiral in the world. And it is interesting too like... Hey, do you know what the NFL player? You know an NBA player. I know an NBA player. I don't know any NFL player. We know a hockey player. Do we? He's not... He didn't go in a gel, though. Yet. Right? I don't know. What's Kaplan doing? Watching our videos. I see him on the radio all the time. Yeah, that's true. That's true. He's in the minor ranks. Yeah, he's semi-pro. Yeah, that's cool. Yeah. Because you said that. And I was like, you know him. But, okay, yeah, so we know two. Yeah, and then... Who do I know? I know a guy who used to play for the Chiefs who was aligned back with the Chiefs. And then... Oh, I know. I know anyone in the NFL. I got a friend who used to be a quarterback. Who? Why are you laughing like that? This is a bad... I can tell this is a bad... Who is it? My friend Peyton. You're secretly really good friends, Peyton. Hey. Because I know... Because I know one of you is listening because you stole our idea. If you could help me set up a bit where I'm just secretly friends with Peyton, and then I can just bring him up a party and be like, yeah, my friend Peyton. And then, like, they're like, oh, yeah. And then it's like... Just a bunch of photos of you with Peyton. But it's like... It's a really funny bit. Really quiet about it. It's a really funny bit. And I promise I would be quiet about it. So... But if you've seen NFL players in person before, right? Just start sneaking Photoshop photos of Peyton Manning into photo dumps that you post. All right. And so it's like... It's like a photo dump of... But he's like in the background. He's like back there. He's hanging out with Peyton Manning. But no, what I mean is that you've seen NFL players in person before, right? There was a lineman who used to come to the Starbucks that I'd go to. I probably said this before the podcast. But like, you can tell. They're a monster. It's not one of those things where it's like... He's not going to be in the league. No, you can tell. Yeah. And that guy did not look like he had done the conditioning or weightlifting too. Yeah. That's led pull. That's led pull. Where he's like... Skip toe. Like he looks like he's afraid to get caught. Like what are you doing? Yeah. And there's also a moment in that... There's a long... He posted a long video of him on the beach. Okay. And there's a moment where the guy who's throwing for him pulls him over. He's wearing his little helmet. And the guy pulls him over on the football. He draws routes on the football. And it's just kind of like... Nobody that's in the league would do that. Like you're not sitting there drawing a route for the guy. You just tell him the route. Like they all have names. Yeah. And you saw that guy's throwing a ball. He doesn't know the names. And so... And then also immediately... You notice... Yes. Look at his legs, dude. That's not... Yeah. His side of gravity is way too high. That's not professional grab. That's gravity. That's not professional. That doesn't... That doesn't have the physical appearance of I've trained for years for this. And I think the thing that you also... I haven't seen a lot of people talk about this. But this isn't the 49ers facility. This is just some gym. Yeah, what is some fitness facility? Yeah. This is just some gym. Yeah. But like during off season, whatever. If you're like... If you're like deep on the roster, you know... That's another thing. A lot of people are like, Oh, people in the NFL all make a ton of money. And it's like... Yeah. I know that linebacker because he lived in my apartment complex in Kansas City. So it's like... He lived in your apartment complex? Yeah. Wow. Was he... Was he never a squad? He was never a starter. No, he's a full squad. But he played for three years. Interesting. And then... I mean... Now he's a realtor? Smart. Oh, so... What are realtores? But people whose dreams did not work out. Say, you know... And... And... And... Hey! And I know for a fact... I know for a fact... Because I see the trajectory of this podcast. So this is not me knock him in, you guys. This is me saying, I can't wait to join you guys. There is you. Uh... Wait. Was he there after he retired or was that while he was... No, yeah. Oh, I can't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's more sense. But it wasn't like he was old. He was like, he was like, you know... Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's also one of those things where it's like, dude... If you play for three years... And you... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's more sense. But it wasn't like he was old. He was like, you know... Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's also one of those things where it's like, dude... If you play for three years and you never move up to starter, your career in the NFL could be done at 23, 24. Yeah, yeah. But also if you're smart with that money, too, though... Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's not like it was a ton of money. Yeah, I mean... But the minimum salary for a 53 man roster player is $750,000. Right. So it's like... Ah, yes. It is a good chunk of money, yes. That's not what I mean. I mean, it's not a ton of money. It's not like he was making 40 million. True. And what I mean is that... Yeah. So... Keep going. The guy who come in Starbucks would like literally the whole room would go like... Well, I got big. Because he was a lineman. Yeah. And I think I'm a big guy. I'm a big guy, but that was... That guy was scary. Yeah, they're insane. So his Instagram... That's because they eat to pick up trucks for breakfast. So the video of him running around on the beach goes viral. His Instagram obviously then people go digging. And they go through his Instagram. And they start looking at a lot of the content. And it's all stuff like this where it's just him in his 49ers clothes and with his helmet. Yeah. Just kind of walking around places. But then also pictures of him with like nice cars. Okay. Uh-huh. And so it's just weird stuff like that. You got a gun? I don't think that's a gun. I don't know what that is. You don't even have a gun? God, I don't... I'm in on that. That's a knife at least. Yeah, it could be a knife. But what's strapped to his leg? I don't know what he's got strapped there. I'm not sure. Okay. Um... And... You don't want to do it. So it's something relevant to the story later, Tim's going to bring up. It is not relevant to the story. I don't know what it is. I haven't seen it. Okay. And I did not notice it until it was on the big screen. The big screen. But... That's 55-inch TV we got up there. The big screen. But he... He put it on the big screen. There's always footage of stuff like this. And there's also... So it's... It's a mix of... This is my old TV from my living room. This is your old TV from your deck, isn't it? Or your patio? No, no, no. I have that one. Yeah. Yeah. L.A. This is the one I had before I switched to my fire TV that I bought. Oh, nice. Um... I used the office as an excuse to buy a new TV for my apartment. Remember? I do remember that. I was like, here we can put this TV in the office. Oh, I don't need it anymore because I need it. I need to buy a new TV. I don't need this TV anymore. Then you go to Reagan and be like, someone stole our TV. Someone stole our TV. Someone stole our TV. It's crazy. Uh, it is interesting. Never mind. Um, I was just going to complain about my TV. It's so frustrating to me. We had a new... So... So he... In a new what? I turned my TV on the other day and there was a new terms of service. And I scroll through the terms of service and it's like, you agreed to let us share all your watching habits with anybody. Um, and I was like... No. No, I don't agree to that. And so I didn't. I didn't agree to it. And then literally everything. It was like, you have to agree the terms to use this. And so I was like, I... This literally became useless if I don't agree. And I feel like that should be illegal. Like, I should be able to say, no, you don't get to see my... No, we're in hell, dude. It's crazy. You've seen the HP printer thing, right? Yeah. Yeah. Like, we're... This isn't... Like, this is crazy that we exist in this timeline. Yeah. It's bananas. It's bananas that we let them do this. They go, yeah, the app doesn't work unless you... Unless you approve those terms of service. And you're like, I don't want you to do this. I haven't thinking lately. Do you think that this is possible? If we start a nonprofit, that is a super pack that operates off donations. Do you think you could... Like, do you think it's even possible to play ball? Probably not, dude. Well, no, I ran the numbers. Like, if you could get a million people in on. Which is a small pop portion of the population. To just commit to 20 bucks a month. That's half a million... Half a billion every two-year cycle. Yeah. And then there's a trillionaire who is funneling... Yeah, but he only spent in the last election. What was it? 180 million? 250. Okay, but still, that's less than what you could raise in that pack if you had a million people. So we could raise two Elon Musk's. Yeah. Okay. But they have... More Elon Musk's. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But what I'm saying is like... Do you think it's possible, where if you could create a precedent of, like, community led superpacks? Do you think it's possible? No. Hey, we just reduced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live Hangouts. You get to join the Discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so... But also, you know, the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, like... You know, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. And... No. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody you like the show. And thanks for being here for this episode. I'm not trying to be... I really wish it was. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think if they see that we're crowdsourcing, they will just source more. Yeah. You know what I mean? Or change the rules. Yeah. Or change the rules. Or making a minimum threshold. Yeah. No. It's not possible. Interesting. So unfortunate. But that's okay. Yeah. That's okay. Okay. I don't know. I don't know why. I don't like being in this conversation. I don't like being here. Ah. So his content goes viral. Yeah. The video of him on the sand. Yeah. And I think it's interesting. And I also haven't heard anybody mention this. But I do think it's really interesting he chose to do this on the beach. I think it was strategic because it's like... Because there's a reason that the route looks weird. Yeah. There's a reason the steps look weird. Someone's saying... You're running in the sand. So we're building the way this guy is not actually on the 49ers, right? But here's the thing. You Google him. And like Google says, he's a Y receiver for the San Francisco 49ers. Why? And it tells you all about his... How do you do that? And if you look it up, like you can see, like if you just look up his name... Receive. Okay. His LinkedIn. Hold on. His LinkedIn. Is he on the player roster? Yeah. It comes up on the player roster and everything. And so... No. So... Wait. The LinkedIn, though, for audio listeners says, Dejan Love. Receiver at National Football League. Like he just put that as his job. Receiver at NFL. Okay. And so there is all kinds of content and... And he's an affiliate for Liquid IVE. What's interesting is he's constantly posting stuff that... It's POVs of him walking to the stadium. It's scenes from in the locker room. It's things like this. So it's like, okay, there's some things that are kind of sketchy here. Like you look at it. You're like, why is he carrying his football home and everywhere? Like you said, you're definitely not allowed to just take that with you. And even if you are allowed, nobody does. That's weird. And then, too, like the routes are bad. He does not look like in the physical and condition to be in the NFL. Okay. But there's also a lot of stuff. Like there's the Google stuff. The POV footage is like, what is going on? His name is listed on the roster. It comes up if you Google it. But if you read the roster. Okay, that's what I was wondering. And so he also, though, there's another subset of content in his... There's another subset of content in his social media profile. Okay. So he's got all this 49er stuff. All of his, I'm on NFL received stuff. And he's also got some very conspiracy stuff. He's big and queuing on. No, he's got all this investor stuff. And he's like, he's like, I'm a big time investor. He's like, he said he was born in Switzerland. And he comes from a banking family in Switzerland, and which is one of the wealthiest families in Switzerland. Convenient. And he moved to the States when he was eight years old. And then he's... I moved over here at eight years old. I knew second grade was going to be better here in the States. Yeah. And then I left my parents behind. I said, it's Feed of A. It's whatever they say. It's Feed of A. And I left. It's here at eight years old. He's Chuck E. Cheese for the first time. It is like, I'm staying forever. I live here. I'm never leaving. Speaking of Chuck E. Cheese, I'm still mad about this. So anyway. A few weeks ago, I had no context tweeted on Threads. Yeah. I had no context tweeted. Oh. I broke Threads. I said, all right, all right. Who stole my master remote? No context. Zero likes. Zero comments. Zero retweets. Zero shares. And I was like, this is gold. So I retweeted it. Oh, say it again. All right, all right. Who stole my master remote? Which is, I don't know if you know what that's from. And I'm honestly offended that more people don't know what that's from. It's really funny. No, it's not funny. It's a reference to mid 2000 Chuck E. Cheese. There was a master remote that you could push buttons on. And one of them would Chuck E across the whole store. Like, you would push the buttons and make the whole store. It would make Chuck E. Cheese say this thing through the loudspeakers. And one of them was all right, all right. Who stole my master remote? It was Chuck E. Cheese saying it. Yeah. And kids would spam that. They were just, all right, all right. Who stole my master remote? All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all the time. And I cannot understand how more people were like, oh, yeah, I remember that. I'll be honest with you. I'll read it all. I geared deep. I searched. All right, all right. Who stole? I'm just going, I'm going to leave it at that. Sure. Yeah, go ahead and add that. Go ahead and add the rest of the sentence. Because I can see your eyes. You're like, oh, 49ers roster came up. So the 49ers just come up with Amy Google search. Okay, I'm going to add my master to this. Who are I? There we go. There we go. It came up. All right, all right. You got it. You're going to play an audio of it. Yes, sure. All right, who's got my master remote? All right, all right. Who's got my master remote? That was pretty good impersonation. I'm just, I'm still mad that nobody got that speaking of threats. I would like to take a second to read you some replies that I got to something I posted. Okay. And then I'm going to reveal what that post said. So first I'm just going to, I just want to go through the replies first before I tell you what I posted deal deal. Deal. Okay. And I got to believe some of these. Uh, you can't get divorced. No one else will take you. This is a simple mind to the opinion I expect from a grade school child. Grow up. I wish your wife and her second husband the best of luck. It's great because I know where this is going to be. You need to learn how to cope in ways that prevent this from becoming someone else's problem. Someone posted a screenshot of our podcast and said, this person is a bleep. And I have removed his podcast from all things. I was watching it too because his podcast was on Deezer. This is also a person who would take an animal into the rainbow bridge and would not sit with them. What? Okay. Uh, I had an ex who agreed with you. He was also abusive. Your wife better see the red flags and leave. Now you would think that I posted something outrageously creepy. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's what I posted word for word. Here's what I posted. My wife is acting like I'm crazy for not wanting our dishes used for cat food. If a fork goes into their food, I will never use it again. That's it. You would think that I said my fat stupid wife. My wide deceiver. My wide deceiver. Like you would think that I would have taken a picture of my wife and been like, can you believe this idiot? All I said was my wife's acting like I'm crazy for not wanting our dishes used. And then I, and then I, you, you're the reason this, this even started. I did. I did. I did stuff. You were the first response and you said, uh, tell me you never had pets without telling me you never had pets. So then I started, then I started fueling the flames. All right. Because I said, uh, dang, this threat is hitting hard with people who let their dogs lick the inside of their mouths. They didn't like that. And then I responded and said, update. She did it again. Her punishment is that she has to eat cat food for a week. A joke. They do. Oh, you know, you're joking about abusing your wife and making her eat cat food. Someone, and then some guy responded to that and said, boy, I bet you're a treat to live with. Which I said, don't say treat too loud. She'll come running. But so I just think it's so crazy. There are things I see people post online and I'm like, I don't think you should have posted that. You know, but like this is just me being hyperbolic. Yeah. It's like clearly a joke. And also, even like a joke, it's just like, oh yeah, I'll never use that fork again. It's like, yeah, I can wash it. But also it's just a preference of like, hey, I don't like it. It makes me feel gross. But I think there's also the factor of like a lot of those people clearly like did some research on you. And they knew you were a comedian. And so I feel like the logic of conclusion would be like, oh, this guy's probably like just be just fun. Poking around. Yeah. Dude, it's like, it's like if you throw up and like people are like, oh, did you never use the popcorn bowl that you threw up in? No. No, I didn't. If I threw up in that bowl, it's trash now. That's really funny. Are you guys crazy? I was telling, I was telling my barber. It's crazy that you said that. I was telling my barber the other day. The story of one of the story from college Gavin when someone was making a lot of noise on your floor one night. Yeah. This was after you left. Someone was making a lot of noise on your floor one night. And he came out two o'clock in the morning. And the way I described this to my barber was like, he came out with that bowl. But it's like, it's not a normal, it's not a bowl you use for anything but pukin' in. That's what I said on my barber. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he came out and it was full of ice and like overflowing of ice. And he was like, someone's getting ice tonight. But like, dead sea ice. It's so funny. Because you're so mad that your floor was being too loud. It was late. It was like 2 a.m. That was the reason they tore the building down. No. But anyway, yeah, I straight up, we were scrolling. It's like the same thing when I posted that cat video. Yeah. And the number of responses like you're abusing this cat. I was like, it's crazy. It is insane. I don't even know what to call it. But just the beat downs online are crazy. Yeah, and sometimes it's deserved. Yeah, for sure. But the problem is that when you do it, and then what happens, I can look at those profiles, the people who are saying crazy stuff. And you can click the replies tab. And this is all they do all day. Is they just, and they've got to be sitting there being like, yeah. And there's a lot of bots that do too. True. Like spirals. And I think there's a lot of people though, where it's like, it's like, if they, if they came across that post, when I came across that post, and I left my comment, yeah, they want to have commented. It's like, they won't be the first. They won't even be the fifth or sixth. But one third's hundreds. Yeah. Literally that that I can get lost in the noise. You go find that thread. It had a thousand replies. You had a thousand replies. This wasn't, this isn't me being like, oh yeah, there's 20, no, this is 1300 replies. Yeah. And that's when I started putting gas in the fire. Yeah. And I was like, this is funny. You guys are crazy losers. Yeah. Yeah. So, so he's trending. Sure. People are looking at all this content and being like, okay, the workout videos don't seem right. But then he's posting all this investor content, talking about all of the his investment strategies and how he can help you with investing and things like that. And so people start digging a little bit closer. And that's when some investigative reporters start to find out that they find a woman by the name of Ayanna Velasquez, who met him on a dating app in 2021. All right. And she said, yeah. How you spell it? A-Y-A-N-A. Mm. Okay. And she said, yeah, she said at the time he was going back Jonathan and she said that she was really skeptical because he made a really big deal about how he's from one of the richest families in Switzerland. And she was a little skeptical of him the way he was saying it and like the way he presented himself and stuff. Sure. And then she said he had a private chef and showed up for this date and the chef was there. And he's like, the chef seemed like he wasn't a professional. Yeah, because the chef was like drawing routes on the spatula. And he was like, yeah, what is this business? So, first thing, it's like a botchy chef. Hey, hold on. I don't think I'm going to do this. I'm very funny. A botchy chef comes out and is like, hey, I just want to make sure that it's an improv team. We're like, hey, I got to get verbal consent from everyone about what I'm going to do. So, what I'm going to do is I'm going to cut the vegetables up and then I'm going to cut the onion into a little volcano, put a little oil in there. I'm going to make a volcano. Is that cool with that? Yeah. Cool. And then I'm going to cut the tails off the shrimp. I plan on flicking them at every one of you. Yeah. Does anybody's birthday? Two tails for you. Great. Great. I do hate. I do need a verbal. Yes. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And then I'm going to set one of you on fire. Is anybody interested in that? We're going to have you lay on the grill. You're just going to lay on the grill and you'll be dinner. So, and she was like, she was like, it was just scary. I don't know when you don't know where to go with a bit. You go, we should kill someone. You should kill that guy off. We need to write this guy off the bit. She's. Uh, and so she, she goes to them. She's like, this just feels like a red phone. She went to dinner. She went to dinner. She did dinner and at the dinner. She's like, everything about this feels like he's having a power move. That'll hire her. Her boxy chef to come to the house. Pretty sick. And so, uh, he ended up reaching back out to her in 2024. And he was like, hey, by the way, I made it to the NFL now. Yeah. And she was, she looked at her. Uh, she looked at his profile. And she did a little bit of, uh, a sleuthing, uh, because he sent her a bunch of photos and screen recordings of him walking the same. And because he sent it directly to her, she was like, I'm going to look at the metadata. And she realized all this stuff, all this POV footage was screen recordings. And so he went and found NFL players who had posted stuff and screen recorded it and just said this is my video. Uh, okay. And so it's like a POV video walking into Levi's stadium. A POV in the, in the locker room. He's not in the video. He's saying like, these are pictures I took and videos I took. And he was just sending screenshots and screen recordings to her and claiming they were his. Okay. And so she blocks him again. It's like, this guy's crazy. Yeah, this guy's crazy. Hey, I made it to the NFL. Yeah. Yeah. She sees it and she's like, no, you. Hey, remember when you came over in my French chef? My chef. My chef. My chef, my chef. My mom. My mom was there. She made us that food. Oh, my mom is like the best chef of all time, actually. She made Dino nuggets. She told me to go to this guy's. Dino nuggets and mac and cheese. Yeah. And he's like, he's like, yeah, I'm really religious families. And I actually hired this personal chef. And she comes in and she goes, hi. Hello. Hello. Yeah. Tonight's main course. He's going to be. Dino nuggets. And you're like, what? Dino nuggets. Dino nuggets. Dino nuggets. And then, man. Macroni. Macroni. Macroni. And that's the case. So make it seem a little forward. And then yeah, she serves the plates. You see it. You realize it's. This is just mac and cheese. Yeah. And Dino nuggets with a lot of ketchup. And it's like those 90s. Hercules plates too. Like it's like a plastic Disney somewhere. And then he looks at you. And he's like, isn't it incredible that they shape this like that? They can get it in that shape in the world. She does this by hand. The presentation is amazing. You got to kind of shake it off. Shake one off. The ketchup. I'm going to shake the ketchup off. So he did. He did. That's way too much. A lot of ketchup. Got a spot. There's everywhere. It's on the ceiling. Oh. You look up. You can tell. He's like, he gets. He gets. He's. It's all over his fingers. He does the kid thing. And he's like, you know, I made it to the NFL. And she's in here. We're like, I. This actually makes it more believable that you have. I'm not going to see you. I'm pretty sure this guy's pretty. I'm pretty sure this guy's been tackled. I'm pretty sure this guy's been tackled. I'm not too many conditions. Oh, lot. Okay. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I got to text my friend Peyton. So, uh, so this goes viral. This becomes a whole big thing. And then in, uh, summer of 2016. So really recently, he goes on this kind of multi-state tour. When? Uh, between July 15th and August 24th. Of 2026. That's the 2016. Yeah. You're really. You said 2016. So really recently. That's where I was like, uh, oh my God. He goes on this multi-state tour, where he goes to New Mexico, California, Oregon, Nevada, Utah, Idaho. And while he's in all these different places, he is meeting up with different women. He's talking about financial products. He's also there with his financial planner. And his financial planner, like he's going, he's meeting these women, he's going on dates with them and then he meet, they're meeting up with his financial planner. Okay. And they're on this tour. And then finally, August 24th, 2026, they arrive in Boise, Idaho. They. This is like literally last, last week by the time we're recording. Yes. Yeah. They arrive in Boise, Idaho, and they're walking through the airport. And the FBI detains him and, uh, his financial planner, his financial planner, his financial planner's name, financial planner slash personal chef, slash, slash mom, uh, his financial planner is a guy by the name of Taylor Chan, um, oh, dude, imagine you're a girl. You've matched, personally, you've matched with this 40 year old. Yeah. He's, he's 35 day, John on tender. And then he wants to introduce you to his financial planner who ears pierced a couple pimples on the chin, uh, trying to grow a mustache. I hate it. They're both smiling in their mug shot. They're both so punchable. Yeah. He's 18 years old. Taylor is 18 years old. Yeah. He looks like that's what I'm saying. He's like, ready for prom. Yeah. And so what. What were they doing? FBI put out a statement and they said that they had arrested the two of these because, um, they're both like, jeezing in these pictures. Yeah. It's crazy. Are these their drivers license photos? They might be drivers with the blue background actually driver's license photos. Yeah. These don't look like mug shots. This is what, this is what the news is using for, uh, it's probably their drivers license now that I think. Yeah. You're probably right with the blue background. That makes way more sense. Yeah. Um, less punchable. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I think I have 40 for sure going back about five or six years, uh, Dejan has, uh, been running the scheme where he claims to be either a wealthy Swiss banker or a professional football player. And he matches with women on Tinder meets them, goes on a couple of dates with them, gets good favor with them. And then basically creates this pitch where he's like, hey, I want to help set you up for life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Back when we were single. Yeah. Says, hey, I just matched with this guy and he's an NFL player. We would immediately be like, hey, now you didn't know you didn't know you didn't, uh, Hey, October 22nd, we're doing till alive as part of the fountain city comedy festival here in Kansas City. You got a tillin.com slash live for more information. You get passes. There's going to be more than just us. Oh, yeah. That's like legitimately not an advertisement right now. The festival's pretty sick. Like there's a really great lineup. A lot of really good comics. This thing's been growing a lot the past couple of years. So really cool to be the part of it. Uh, and so hopefully we'll see you there. Uh, you have to be matching with people who are like, you know, I mean, yeah, I don't know. It's like when you watch the catfish show. Yeah. And like the stuff they're willing to believe where it's just like, yeah, I, uh, I am dating this guy who works in in FinTech, but he doesn't have fast enough Wi-Fi for us to Face time. So you're like, that doesn't make sense, yeah, Hannah, yeah, yeah, you know, so, uh, over these four years, he's, he's meeting them and then he pitches like, hey, I'm, I'm a big time investor. Um, I would love to help set you up. I have a financial planner. I'll just introduce you and he should want to plan to help help build a future for you. Yeah. And get your finances in order. Here's the number to his leapfrog. And yeah, that he introduces up the chair who's, he was 18 years old. Yeah. And this goes back and this is the polls on his think pad. I want to look. Okay. Let me just set you up with my financial plan stuff here. I'm really curious about the timing of this because Chan is 18 at the time of the arrest. And they say that this is going on for four or five years. And so he started this at 13, 14 years old. Like, that's crazy. I don't know if it must not have been with this same. I don't know if he's been a part of it the whole time. That's the thing I don't know. That's what I want. They signed up for services. One of the, like, how is it? Are they just getting money directly to their account? So then they meet up. Is it the thing where it's a huge gap? And this is crazy because this is actually in the, in the report is they use an app where you get fake returns. No, they use an app called fake bank account pro, which isn't fake bank account. Fake bank account pro, which is an Android app that just lets you make it look like your bank account has a lot of money. And so it just looks like a regular, like a bank of America screen, chase bank screen. And you can just put in the number and so you can be like, look how much money I got. And that's what they would do is they would meet up. And they'd be like, we want to show you the returns that we're getting him. So they would show and be like, these are the returns that we're getting. That's what I'm saying. They would just funnel it directly to them. And then what they would do is they would, yeah, they would transfer the money into an account that they would then manage for them to help get, and that would be an investment account. And they would pressure pretty heavily. And so it'd be like, dump your savings into it. The more money you can put into it, the better. If you have to go get a loan or if you have to borrow some money from a friend, it just gets the money. And over the course of these four years, what the FBI says is, hey, you're the friend that I'm going to borrow from. Yeah, you're, you're the NFL player, you're the NFL player. If I'm going to borrow from anyone, it's you. I work at Wendy's. And so they would, they would like show these accounts that have like $30 million in it. And be like, yeah, yeah, just just transfer it. So they would do it. And the FBI, the number of the FBI gives is over the course of four or five years, they have record right now of 26 women totaling $1.3 million, they've defrauded from them. Holy cow. The FBI says that we're pretty confident there's more. We just have not tracked everyone down. Right. And so Chan, Taylor Chan was like the, the brains behind this. It looks like not like the brains. Like it does seem like Dejan planned all this, but Taylor Chan was the guy who, who facilitated a lot of the technical side of this. Okay. And so he was the one doing the SEO. And so he was the one who went out and he made it. So if you search Dejan, he says, he's a wide receiver. Yeah. Yeah. All of the AI SEO, he was saying, hold on, now we read the SEO. Dejan loves a wide receiver for the San Francisco 49ers. And information about his position, contract, and teammate texting habits is available online. That's the AI overview teammate texting habits. Yeah. Yeah. Because he posted a video that one viral of like, hey, these are the texts I got from my teammates on the 49ers. Okay. But look, that TikTok thing two years ago, Dejan love, SF 49ers teammate texting habits revealed. Yeah. And so he's been doing this, they've been doing this stuff to create a trail of him being on the team and the storyline of him on the team. And to enough, enough to where if you do a quick Google search and you don't dig, like if you just do a quick Google search, it brings up all this 49ers stuff. There's all this content that AI says he's a part of it. And so if you just wait, go pull that back up. What's the image it uses? It uses an image of him on the field. Well, that's just a 49er. And so that was the thing that they did a lot is like if they needed game footage or actual footage in a facility, they just use somebody else because they're like, no one's going to look close enough to recognize if it's him, he's in a helmet. And it's like, it's like, oh, yeah, that looks good. They don't know. Potentially be him. Yeah. And there's actually, there was a whole thing he talked about, because for a while he wore number seven, but there's a player who wears number seven. And also seven isn't a receiver number. Yeah. And then he started wearing four, but then there's a player who was four. And so he was like, yeah, they bought me out of the number, or I was, I got injured, so they had to give the number away. And so he would constantly be making these story lines up about like, how his number got moved and things like that. You love this because you love lying, right? I mean, lying is fun. Yeah. No, you love to lie. I think I don't love to lie. I don't love to lie. I do like. No, you don't love getting caught, but you do enjoy lying. There is kind of a thrill of like, there is a little thrill of like, can I get you to believe something really dumb? But it's not like I was a little bit of a thrill to it. But it's not like I was a little bit of a thrill to it. Of course, of course. When I do what I feel a lot of cheat people. Okay. Yeah. I mean, of course. But there is something about it. There's something that's a little fun for us. No, but what's really weird is this goes viral. The whole story explodes in the last couple of weeks. It has been everywhere. And the commentary about this is strange because there's obviously the people who are like, this is so bad. Like there's a lot of people who were taking advantage from this and that's bad. Sure. But then there's like a whole side, there's kind of two different storylines happening on top of each other. There is a chunk of people who are like, how did you fall for this? And they're like showing all this stuff and like, this is not, this is pretty obviously not real. But to the people who are saying that are all football fans. And so it's like, you look at this immediately, you can tell you're like, this doesn't make, there's a lot of red flags here. But if you're not a football fan, and you don't follow that world, like, why wouldn't he carry his helmet around? Why, why, like that, that training video, I don't know what you're supposed to look like when you're wearing a sled, like, I don't know what a route is supposed to look like. And so that stuff would go. That is how it works. I mean, everyone, and I mean, were you ever on the dating apps? No. Oh, okay. Sorry. I was. I remember the time I deleted Bumble was when I went to Starbucks and the barista because that was regular Starbucks. Yeah. And the braces that I knew pretty well went, I guess who I saw on Bumble last night, and I was like, never again, and I went and sat down and deleted the apps. Delete, delete, delete, delete. And I was like, I don't want you guys to see my profile. But there's a level of, I don't want to say desperation. But when you're scrolling the apps and you're not getting likes, yeah, you know, you're vulnerable. Yeah, for sure. And when you're vulnerable, it's the same way, it's the same way we watch people who abuse church systems. Yeah. And abuse police systems to get vulnerable people. Yeah. You know, and when you're vulnerable, you suspend the belief a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. And so there's people who are like, I can't believe these people are falling for this. It's crazy. And that's kind of, you know, but the other side of it, that's even darker that is really surprising to me, is there as a whole chunk of the internet right now? Get your bag. That is like, that is like women have been doing this to men forever. It's about time. Oh, yeah. It's about time. That's not a whole side of the internet. That's just Joe Rogan. I mean, there's a pretty big about, like, if you search his content, there it really is. Like, I would say it's probably split in like four tranches. There's like the people who are like reporting on the story, like kind of like just like it's whatever. It's just the facts. Then there's the people who are like, this is dumb. You're dumb if you believe this and kind of poking fun at it. And then there's the people who are like, who feel bad for them. Yeah. Like, have empathy. And then then literally the other fourth of the content that you see is like, good, good. We got it. They deserve it. They deserve it. They've been doing this to us forever. They've been getting their bags. They've been getting and like Gucci bags and their shoes and their dry, like, it's about time someone leaks money from out of them, which is crazy. It's crazy that that is a response that I mean a lot of people are having. And I think what I would say to that is, you don't deserve it. You don't deserve a wife. That's he's reading comments from his thread from earlier as when he's doing it. If you're serious about this post, you are insane. The mental health parody provisions of the Affordable Care Act are still in place. And you have the right and duty to seek medical treatment for your obvious psychosis. This post is grounds for a restraining order. That's what I would say to those guys. I would copy what that guy said to me about the cat food. Crazy, dude. I mean, it is like, dude, people believed him. I mean, have we talked about the craziest catfish story I've ever heard on the podcast before? I don't think so. Have you heard this story? I think it was in Germany, but it was a girl meets a guy online, right? Let's call him Jonathan. So she starts talking with Jonathan back and forth. She has an hour and a half train commute every, or 45 minutes there, 45 minutes back, right? I'm a train to her work. So for an hour and a half every day, she just puts her headphones in and she calls Jonathan. And her and Jonathan talk on the phone. They, they, this relationship develops over many months, right? Eight, nine months in. She's kind of like, hey, I really do want to meet up in person. You know, it always falls through. It's always one of those things. But they literally talk for 45 minutes on the way to work and 45 minutes on the way home every single day. Yeah. So an hour and a half, they're just on the phone every day. She develops this really good connection with Jonathan, right? And so, you know, nine months in when he's still kind of dodging, coming, coming and visiting, her and her friends are kind of like, this is weird, right? And, you know, at about month 11, almost a year, she's like, hey, what's going on? Yeah. You know, like, I don't want to do this with you anymore, right? And in Jonathan tries to be like, oh, no, no, no, no, it's good, it's good. So then she starts to sleuth around. She finds those same pictures. And it's not Jonathan. It's a male model, right? And let's call him, I forget their names, but his name is Trevor, right? Yeah. And here's the thing. Trevor's pretty hot. And so, but it is, it's the same pictures. So she reaches out to Trevor. Yeah. I'm making up the names. I forget the names, but this story is true. She reaches out to Trevor and she says, hey, I don't know if you'll ever see this. She sends like an email to his like, because he's like, like a big time model. Yeah. And she emails and she's like, I don't know if you'll ever see this. I have been talking to someone for almost a year who's been using your pictures. And I just want you to know that someone's out there pretending to be you just for your own safety kind of thing, right? She sends off the email. Week later, Trevor responds and he's like, I'm so sorry this happened to you. That's awful that someone took advantage of you. So her and Trevor start talking, well, then her and Trevor start dating and they get married. So she marries the guy in the pictures that she was getting catfished with. And here's the crazy. Here's the part that like has like genuinely stuck with me for years. I write this story however long ago, like eight years ago, right? Yeah. The part that's genuinely sticks with me for years is that she says she'll wake up, she'll have a coffee, making breakfast and Trevor will come in the kitchen and she'll say something. And then she has to constantly remind herself, was that real Trevor or fake Trevor? He's not Jonathan. Yeah. Yeah. Because all of the conversations and the memories and the inside jokes and all of the stuff that she shared with Jonathan are attached to that person, physical person form. That's crazy. And when she sees him, she has to now separate, that is, that's a black me episode. That is crazy, actually. That is insane. Wild. That is wild. So did she ever, did she ever go back and be like, hey, they confronted it, but I don't know, but I don't think the person stole any money or anything. So by the way, I married you by the way, here's pictures of us at the wedding and he's like, sorry, you weren't there. That's so crazy. What if, what if it was him the whole time? What if Trevor was pretending to be John, he was like, oh, I'm so sorry, this is happening to you. He's like, he's like, wait, I got so far in too deep. I told her my name is John and things like panic. My name is Trevor. Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap. And now he's like, oh, wait, this is my out, so now he's catfishing her, after catfishing her. And now he has to constantly remember, wait, did I? Is this Johnathan or this Trevor? I can't pretend. I can't know me. Tell me this story. And he's actually never known it before. I've never heard that before. So that's another level of crazy. Yeah, that's insane. Would you look after someone? No. Well, I'd have. Oh, what? I hate how he was like, no, I wouldn't. Wait, have we? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you talking about this? Probably. When I was in college, a friend of mine, some guy tried to pick her up. And she, like, couldn't say no, she, like, so she just gave him my number. And so she texted me and was like, hey, I gave this guy your number, saying it was mine. And so then I just texted him for a while, and I let him on for a while, because it was really funny to me. And then it got weird. And then I was like, we're like, we're like, we're kind of friends. I've kind of, you went back to that girl and you were like, hey, I don't know how to say this. He's super cool. He's like, pretty great. Did you know he plays for the 49ers? No, he sucked. I'm the, he sucked a lot. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to experience when it was like, honestly, I do remember, like, honestly, you and I probably, I probably showed you some of the text because there was, there was things he said to me that I was like, oh my gosh, I was like, that's disgusting. Oh my gosh. I was, I can't believe, there really was things he said that I was like, leave, he would holy cow. And there was, there's things too that was, that were like kind of innocent things that, but it was like, but like, thinking about it, I was like, this is so weird and cringey. Yeah. And so I don't know, it makes me uncomfortable to think about it. He takes you at 11, 11 every night and be like, and make a wish. Oh, I hate who I was. Yeah. And so I was like, yeah, he, and so I have a crush on a girl. Oh, really? Who is it? I think you know her. He was stupid. Stupid. We were the worst people that existed. Oh, it was a terrible time to be alive. He thought, he thought he was, he thought he was texting her the whole time. Wow. Which also in retrospect, I looked back and I'm like, he thought he was texting her. I was like, that's, that was probably, so yeah, there's a lot of like, that wasn't great. I did send a text at 11, 11 every night and I said, fiddle off. Hey, thanks for being here for this episode of Things Island last night. If you liked it and you want another one, we did a episode about the Hollywood con queen. It was someone who was getting photographers and, and gig workers to show up and pay money for things, but it turned, the person that turns on to be, you would, you probably will not believe. Very, so a very good episode. Actually, one of my favorites is some really good bits in there. And then also, please share this. Talk, tell somebody about the show and tell them you like the show. Get more people to listen to it. Please, you are our soldiers in the streets. You are the Dylan evangelist. I'm in the Dylan army. Yes, sir. Sirs. So, and then join us on Patreon where you can join the actual Dylan army. And those are, it's awesome. We love doing the hangouts. We love seeing everybody there. It's been super fun, genuinely. Great time to get to know everybody and get to see other Dylan listeners. And so, thanks for, thanks for supporting the show. We will see you next week.


A man calling himself Daejon Love presented himself online as a wide receiver for the San Francisco 49ers. He was not on the team. Over roughly four to five years, he used that false identity, along with a second persona as a wealthy Swiss banker, to meet women on dating apps and persuade them to hand over their savings. By … Read More

A Monk Started the Loch Ness Myth 1,500 Years Ago | The Loch Ness Monster Ep 347

10-13-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, man. What's up, dude? Uh, having a good time. Love being here. Are we doing, um, how great and how great Britain became great Britain? Um, I guess you could say like in a way, kind of like it's not, yes, it's not exactly, but it's been a full week since you guys have been here. And last time he was like, Oh, okay, we're gonna, we're gonna, you might be able to guess the topic. And I've been guessing every day for a week. Um, I'm curious, I'm curious. He said I was close. He said I was close with, uh, when I was talking about, I asked about Brexit. And I asked about the Irish potato famine thing. Yeah. Yeah. Are they group potatoes, the famine? Um, um, is it just the enlightenment? No, don't tell you? Yeah. Uh, hey, man, have you ever heard of I should have known it was the Loch Ness monster. I should have known it wasn't close at all. No, it's close. It's it's close geographically. Sure. Um, yes, I have heard of the Loch Ness monster. This came up in a conversation with someone recently. And they're like, have you guys an episode on that? And I was like, actually, no, we why? Yeah. So here we are. We're talking about old Locky. Oh, Loch Ness monster. If we're all just dust in the waves, yeah, I just will be the biggest dust in the world. What's the actor is the richer Alan? Whatever name is. Yeah, you could bring him up a lot. It's because I look at my arm. I'm like, I feel like, yeah, I feel like look like this guy in my head. That's what I look like. Things I learned last night. Just kind of one of those where I think everybody, everybody, yeah, everybody has an idea of the Loch Ness monster. If you don't for audio listeners, it was a picture of Tim when he was younger. And I do think everybody's seen this picture. Like I think everyone's seen the black and white. Like, it's a duck. Is it? It's a duck. Kind of thing, you know. But it's interesting because this actually goes back to a long time. 565 AD. Yeah. Which is interesting. So let's just tell this first story we've got. So 565 AD, uh, Saint Columbus. Uh, he is a name that should make a comeback. Columbus. You know, I'm going to name my first son, Columbus. Columbus. Columbus, Myers. Columbus, Myers. Honestly, there's something about that. Columbus sounds like this is going to, I don't know how to say this. No, no. Columbus sounds like the kid named grade who's gigantic. The plays in the football team, you know, that like he just, he, his family just moved here. Yeah, this year. Yep. And he's way bigger than every other kid in eighth grade. ours was Jared. Jared. What was yours? Columbus. No, ours was, I can't remember that guy's name. The girl Channing. She was 13 feet tall in fifth grade. It is interesting because for the girls, it's just whoever grows first. Right. Like, whatever it's like, hey, you're going to start the volleyball to you. Yeah, you made it. Yeah. And then, and then by the time you get to high school, it's like she's actually the shortest one. No, she's the one else catches up. Oh, yeah, ours was, our, her name was Leanne and she was, she lit it like once we're in high school, she was average height. But she just got to her height way faster than everybody else. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. But we had a couple of kids who were like gigantic. Yeah. Yeah. We had. Jared was, I mean, in fifth grade, he was probably like six to like 280. There was a kid. Now, I'm looking back. There was like, there was a guy in my class who I think he was doing steroids. I'm not even joking. Like, he guy schooler. In high school. No, I think he got, he was on steroids. He got pretty big. I remember in high school, there was a group of guys, we would go in the off season, we would do six a.m. workouts. Yeah. And all I did was abs. Have I told this story? I don't think so. And my, stab me if I told you, I used to do a lot of ab workouts. All I did was abs. No, for real. I did. We, the whole intent, it was like glasses in junior year. We started in January. We went until May six a.m. every day. We would go to the school, jam. We would work out. And there was like six or seven of us. And I'm not exaggerating when I say literally all I did was abs because I wanted to have a six pack that summer. And I remember being so frustrated when May rolled around because like I could do a ton of sit ups. But like, you couldn't, you didn't understand how six packs were fun. Yeah, you could not see a thing. Sure. And I remember talking to the trainer at school and being like, why can't you see it? And he's like, we'll tell me about your diet. And I was like, well, it's Doritos. What was the, what's that red sauce that you buy? El Pato. El Pato. Yeah. And he goes, what? He was like, he's like, yeah, you're going to have to knock that off if you want. And you're like, I don't want abs. I'm not kidding. I stopped going to the workouts. I'm like, oh, that's what it takes. Oh, I got to stop. I was like, oh, I got to stop. I just stop. I have to like help Doritos every day. I never mind. I don't want that. But there was this, there was like one of the kids that we went with. I will never forget. This was junior year of high school. Yeah. He started taking creatine. Yeah. And I thought that that was like a class B narcotic. I was like, I was like, you do what? I was like, oh, I have something at home. I should start, I should start that this month. Yeah, I was like, I was like, hey, should I do steroids? I take you that day or night. And it's kind of like, I'm kind of joking. I mean, why not? I'm kind of feeling like, why not? You're doing Botox. Why not get another injection? Why not just move to the next phase? Honestly, bro, like, do the Botox, do the Steroids, do the Steroids. Do your GLP ones just start poking, man. Should I just do it? Are you afraid of needles? Yeah. I was going to say I was like, I can't do blood draw. I can do, I can do shots. I can do, you know, I don't like to look at it. But Steroids is in your butt. So you don't have to look at that. And like, when I got the Botox, I closed my eye. I can't see the needle. You don't want to see it. Interesting. Do you think you can do a tattoo? No. I don't want, I don't have any desire for that. But is that because you're scared of it or is that because you don't want it? Both. I think, I think, I don't think I'm scared of it. I think I could do a tattoo. No, I just don't. I'm more afraid of how I'll feel when I'm in my 50s about the mistakes I made years before. I mean, I feel that way about mine. I love all my tattoos, but there are days where I look at it. I'm like, that's so stupid. Why do I do this? This is so stupid. Yeah, but I also feel that about everything in my life. There's so much stuff that I'm like, I love my life. But every day I look at some stuff and I go, why did I, why did I do this? Why did I do that? Why did I do that? So stupid. Anyway, so I'm not going to do Steroids. Yeah, say Colombo say Colombo did Colombo. That's why he got a Saint title because he was doing Steroids. The ST stands for Steroid. The bit was so dead. Tim, I tried to get us back on track and you were like, I got to do one more like one about one more. One more. It's a bit like. So say Colombo, say Colombo, he is, he is in Scotland due missionary work. Yeah, and he ends up going and meeting some locals who were five 96, five 65 and he meets a group of locals who were bearing crazy to think that people were just there. You know what I mean? Like do you think about how many people have existed over time? It is bonkers and like, we have like, you know, we grew up with Bible stories and they condensed a couple of thousand years into one book. And so we kind of just, it's all just one to us. But then you just think about how much time has passed. Yeah, it is crazy. It kind of makes you go like, why wouldn't I do Steroids? If we're all just dust in the woods. Yeah, what's the word? It might as well be the biggest dust in the world. I don't know, dude. I don't know. The biggest dust in the world is crazy. What's the actor is the Richard Allen, whatever name is? Yeah, you've been bringing him up a lot lately. It's because I look at my arm, man. I'm like, I feel like I feel like this guy in my head. That's what I look like. No, I actually want to do it. So I'd have to do steroids. So he's doing mission work in Scotland. He comes across a group of locals who were bearing a man who had been killed by a water monster while swimming in River Ness is what they call that at the time. Yeah, because Loch Ness is an interesting lake. I don't know if it looks kind of like a river. It's like a long. Yeah. And if you're in the middle, you don't know that it ends up there. Yeah. It's just this really long thin lake. Yeah. And it is connected on both ends to rivers. And so that river does outlet to the sea. Right. And then there is another river on the other end that outlets to another lake. That's very similar. The lakes around here are really weird thin lakes all over the place. Sure. And so he's up there and they're bearing this guy who was killed by a water monster. And so a water monster. Yeah. That's the story he's told. And so while he's there, there is another monk that traveled with him. And Columbus said, why don't you swim across the water and see if we can get that monster out of there. And they're like doing a funeral. And he's like. Yeah. They're like out there like. Our friend who we love and miss. And then you just hear. What are you guys doing? He got rope attached to him. He just swimming out in the middle. We're going to get the monster. Yeah. We're going to try to find this water monster. Super interesting stuff you guys are talking about. Starting to wrap. We'll try to be quiet. I hope you're not. I'm sorry for your loss. Bob down on the water. Bob. Bob. Bob. Bob. That's it. Hmm. I think I'm going to name my son. That's a good name for kid. Bob. Bob. He could go by Robert for long. Robert for long. All right. I'm so sick of everyone named being named Columbus. Bob. There's four Columbus in this town, dude. Let's switch it up. Bob. It's short. What do you think? Bob. I like it. So he's swimming out there. And then the sea monster surfaces and rushes the swim with the loud roar at the monk. With a loud roar. With a loud roar. Okay. And so Columbus raises his hand, makes the sign of a cross and commands the monsters. There's go, no further. Do not touch the man. Go back at once. The creature stops instantly as if the description is as if it was pulled back by a rope. And then it flees in terror and all the locals there that were at the funeral started praising God and they converted on on sight. And so we actually have a picture of this event. Okay. This is probably when do you think this was drawn this? Yeah. This is probably a contemporary drawing. Like I would think this is probably drawn relatively recently within the last like 50 years. Okay. But there are plenty of like artistic renderings of this event. This story. How was this story recorded? It was recorded by in a biography of St. Columbus called the Life of St. Columbus, which was written by a dominant of Iona, which was written between 697 and 780. So more than 100 years after his life. So how reliable this account is, they're a little questionable. By a dominant. Adam. A dominant. A dominant. A dominant. A dominant. A dominant of Iona. Yeah. So probably not a super reliable account. Super weird. Bob. Rupert. Robert. Probably not a super reliable account. But here's the thing. It kind of got cemented in like local folklore. Yeah. Of course. That's what I'm saying is like, you know, it gets passed around and also everyone converted. Yeah. And also everyone became Christians. Everyone who saw it became a Christian. That's just like kind of detailed it. Like my mom would throw it in. And everyone who was there became a Christian. They're like, oh, oh, cool. Okay. And so for what's interesting is as far as like recorded history is concerned, we don't have anything else from that point until the early 1800s. 1300 years. Yeah. Of just silence. As far as the historical record is concerned. Okay. It does appear as if there is like folktale of it. Because once this starts to reappear in historical records, it's like, oh, there seems to be a history here. Because in 1817, there is like a story of a sea serpent that is sighted there with multiple humps slithering through the lock. And then in 1820, fossil pioneer Mary Anning discovers the first complete Plesiusaur skeleton. Plesiusaur? Plesiusaur. And so the Plesiusaur, we pull up when it was around and discovers it. Yeah. So she discovers the first we're at full skeleton. She she found it in southwest England on the coast of southwest England. Okay. Where's that at? Right area. Okay. Because this is in inverness is is northern UK. So this is I mean, maybe can a hand was right. Maybe the dinosaurs did coexist with us. So this is this is northern sky. What do we have any pictures of what that full skeleton looks like? Like this. But without the skin or the muscle or any of the blood vessels or tendons or anything inside there. We have pictures of the fossil. Oh, you're killing. That's really funny. I didn't know this, actually. I guess I didn't know until I went to Pompeii. Yeah. They're like fossils aren't bones. No, yeah. They're rocks formed around the bones and fossilized. Also, yes, and or it's we found like their molds that we then poured plaster into the fossil. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because the bones like the cavity. Yes. And so so like I guess when I went when I first heard of Pompeii, I thought there were people inside of these things. And that's now what it is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They were buried. Their bodies are rooted. They're gone, but the cavity is still there of where they were. Yeah. And so then they poured plaster into the cavity and now it's a mold. Now you see it. Yeah. I didn't know that. And that's where a lot of fossils are. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. How how big is this? I mean, they range in size. So like the smaller of the pleasiest or let me pull this up. The smaller length ones. This looks pretty Loch Ness Monstery. They do fit the the vibe pretty pretty pretty good. It doesn't say in this Wikipedia article. Hold on. How long they are? Yeah. Anywhere from 10 to 16 feet. Okay. So length. Yeah. Loch Ness Monstery. Yeah. They do have a larger relative, the Alasama Sores. Yeah. Alasama Sores. Which is 43 to 46 feet long. Similar look. Like it looks very similar. Also found in that region. I don't think it was found in that region. Okay. But so the pleasiestore, what's interesting is and this, I should say, this immediately kind of catches on is like, oh, maybe that's the monster in Loch Ness. Because if you look at the top ography here, while technically there was no way for it to get in the lock today, if we start to raise the sea level a little bit to the era of the dinosaurs, it starts to get to the point where this was like ocean water. Yeah. Especially, I mean, there's probably a tiktotic movement too, so a lot of these mountain ranges are probably not there also, but the point remains. That location was probably underwater during the lifespan of the pleasiestore. Okay. Hey, we just reduced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live hangouts. You get to join the discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so, but also, you know, the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, like, what, you know, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. And, uh, no. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody like the show. And thanks for for being here for this episode. The problem with this theory is the pleasiestores were in extinct like 60 million years ago. So, right. So the odds of unless you're kind of like, yeah, you're right. And the odds of one surviving the lake are pretty slim. Uh, and yeah, the, the lake is so small. Someone, we made fun of Ken Ham and someone in the comments was like, I can't believe you guys would do that. You can't, but you can believe all the stuff that Ken Ham says. He's very make fun of you can't believe that we make fun of it, but you can believe that stuff. So, uh, no. So the pleasiestore, somebody did the math of the size of the pleasiestore versus how much food it would have to intake to maintain the size of it. Oh, sure. Compared to the amount of fish that we know exists in the lock. And they said that it's barely a large enough supply to feed one pleasiestore regularly. Even like the small like 16 footer. Yeah. And so, and that's because like, it, it's not like, oh, it would need because every day it has to intake so much. It would go through the full supply quicker than it would replenish replenish the supply. Right. Right. So it ended up starting itself because it ate too much. And so for a pleasiestore to survive 65 million years, there needs to be multiple to reproduce. And the supply just doesn't match up of fish and Loch Ness. So I can't be a pleasiestore, basically, is what they're saying. Okay. There's not, there's not enough food for it to survive in there. Unless there is something else we don't know more mysterious about Loch Ness. Unless there's a cave where we keep the founding documents of America hidden in the Loch Ness. So some other theories have been proposed. Okay. But before we get to those, I think it's important to get to a guy by the name of actually, let me guess his name. Okay. Yeah. I don't know. I thought you were just going to put up a picture and be like, actually, you guess? No, I was going to say 1933. We needed to go to an event in 1933 because this is important. Okay. This is an event that like revives the storyline in the zeitgeist. Like it had always been like, there's monsters here. This is kind of like the Roswell moment for Loch Ness. Oh. And so this is the photo, right? Yeah. Well, no, close. But April 15th, 1933, there is a woman here. Let me just get the article. I'm going to read it. Read this extra version. Yeah. Video that lady who got attacked by an order. Yes. If we ever thought about maybe this is an order because that looked pretty brutal. I mean, I mean, it could have been in the 536 AD thing. Yeah. I'm a big strong honest. Don't want to die by order attack. How do you want to die? I haven't thought about it. Have you thought of the ways you don't want to die? Oh yeah. Have I told the story about how I choked on a boneless swing one time? I had a near to other experience where I choked on a boneless swing. And in my head, I prayed one. I said, God, please not like this. And then I was like, what am I even choking? There's no bone. One of my even choking on right now. I was on an Applebee's. Yeah. I looked around and I was like, no, we're not here. You know. And then I'd like literally had to do the thing where I was like pushing myself against the table. I got it. But no, I didn't get to the point where I was flailing asking for help. I like shoved myself into the table. Yeah. And got it dislodged. Interesting. But there was a moment there. Yikes. Where I thought on my tombstone, they were going to say the unlimited boneless wings got them. Got you know, got got. And that's message for Applebees. The only way to make money off me in an unlimited boneless swing is to kill me. All right. Because if you give me unlimited wings, I'm going to take you for a ride. And you know what? Matter of fact, I think you need to sue them because those boneless wings are a choking hazard. And there was no label. What was I choking on? It was probably just a chunk of the breading. I guess. I didn't didn't chew well enough. Yeah. I was just inhaling. Yeah. Sorry for that sound. That was not me. That was Tim. I want to be. I want you to know. Jared did that. He's trying to blame me for it. Tim stopped. Speaking of weird mouth noises. 25 minutes in a few weeks ago, you made me laugh really hard at something. Yeah. And I choked. I fully choked. And then for the rest of the episode, I couldn't get it back. Yeah. I was. I throw. And everyone was really mad about it, dude. And I'm really sorry. Comment. All the comments are like, hey, stop. I drink some water. I did. I drink a lot of water. And I couldn't stop. And God, I'm just so funny. Yeah. I'm sorry. Jared's just so good. Sorry about it. I laughed it. He just killed me when the rest of the episode. It's Jared's fault that I was like that. He's not going to say anything else. So that way, I don't choke. But the irony about this is this bit is going to make me laugh really hard eventually because it's going to get really uncomfortable. And I can't handle that. And then I'm going to choke laughing. And then I'm going to be clear about the rest of the episodes. I'm here. We're good. We're good. I just keep going. So they. So the Inverness Corrier puts out an article relaying the events that were released. This is the paper. This is the paper in the furnace. And they say that on Friday of last week, a well done. Is that not what I said? Yeah, you said Corrier. I was like the Corrier. The Corrier. The Corrier. The Corrier. The Corrier. On Friday of last week, a well known businessman who lives near Inverness and his wife, a university graduate had to clarify that. Well, I have to get some qualifications. She's smart. Yeah. Yeah. When motoring along the North Shore, the lock, not far from eight, a brachian peer. Sorry. Here's the thing. The font of this. This is like a scanned Yeah, it's hard to read from yeah, the early 1900s. We're startled to see a tremendous upheaval on the lock, which previously had been calm as the proverbial milk pond. The lady was the first to notice the disturbance, which occurred fully three quarters of a mile from the shore. And it was her sudden cries that stopped and drew the husband's attention to the water. And basically they said that there they saw a creature that was rolling and pledging for fully a minute, resembling a whale on the water. Okay. And so they they tell this story, seeing something that looks like a whale thrashing in the water basically. And this event kind of goes buckwild this article. I don't know what's funny about that. You were looking in the eyes and going buckwild. Do you know what that means? No. Okay. I think it means crazy. Okay. So blackwild urban dictionary. Yeah, it's crazy out of control. That's what it is. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, even in urban dictionary, it's not bad. All right. Buckwild. It's just you looking in the eyes and going and this story with buckwild, which is just not a normal thing to say buckwild to say I'm going to go put some really inappropriate definitions on it. So also I feel like it's very millennial to check urban dictionary. Yeah, I'm going to be honest. That's fair. That's fair. It's like it's like let me check urban dictionary and text cha-cha. Yeah. Yeah. So the later that year, so that that story was 1933 in the summer of 1933, in November of that year, someone puts out the very first photograph. We actually can't find this photo, but it was found that that first photo allegedly of it was just a water bird, like a crane or a swan or something. And so that quickly became discredited. But there was kind of this fervor that was developing. People are going to find out what this is. Yes. And so in December 1933, Big Game Hunter by the name of, actually I'll show you this picture you can guess. At Big Game Hunter, this guy was hired by the Daily Mail. What do you guys, what do you think this guy's name is? Marmin. Close. Marmin. No. Marmin. Marmin. Marmin. No. No. Big Game Hunter. Marma Duke, Weatherell. Marma Duke. I know. I know. I know. He was hired by the Daily Mail to go capture a photo. Looks. He looks like he hunts for big animals, you know? He does. And he doesn't sleep while he does it. He actually hasn't sleep since he started this career. Is this a fake monkey on his camera? Is that a real monkey? I am not sure. I think it's a real monkey. One of those like Zabuma food looking monkeys. I like that you like a lemur. Yeah, I know what you're saying. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For the audio listener, I'll go lemur. Yeah. I mean, if you're like, what is a lemur is like Zabuma food? Oh, so now we skip six steps. We have to retake those steps because Tim's dumb and we're like. Oh, God, not like this. Not about this. Oh my gosh. Not about the moment. We're going to have a moment. So he goes and he goes to try to capture a photo of it. And he's been some time. As you do in your hair. Yeah, it looks very British and that's not common during. He goes to the lock. Yeah. Trying to capture some footage of the lockness monster. Is he take that infamous picture? No. He goes, he can't find it. But instead, he manages to capture some footprints along the shore. Okay. And so they ship, they ship those off the daily mail prints. Someone very quickly recognizes the footprints and says, Hey, those are hippo footprints. And I actually know for a fact that hippos right now, because this is super common, were to use his asterisks, their feet. And so he just took his hippo foot and put on the original picture. He took his hippo foot that he had and was just putting footprints in the in the beach. And then took a picture of that and put it out and everyone was like, Oh, this guy's a liar. And so the daily mail drops the asterisks. Yeah, isn't that weird? Huh. Hey, October 22nd, we're doing Tillin Live as part of the Fountain City Comedy Festival here in Kansas City. You got to Tillin.com slash live for more information. You get passes. This is going to be more than just us. Oh, yeah. It's like legitimately not an advertisement right now. The festival's pretty sick. Like there's a really great lineup. A lot of really good comics. This thing's been growing a lot the past couple of years. So really cool to be the part of it. And so hopefully we'll see you there. Are you seeing hippos following boats? I guess. What do you mean you guess? I mean, I'm you say that. And I'm like, I'm like, I can't recall. But at the same time, I do kind of have a picture of my head of one of them just kind of like with its head and its back sticking out the water just swimming along. No, no, no. Let me show you a video. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about what they're jumping where they're like freaking they're chasing. Oh, it's a Fox News clip. Let me get out of here. I don't want you to have any views from me. Look, and then they just disappear. Then they come back up. Yeah, they're like dogs chasing cars. hippos are scary. They're huge. Whoa, here it comes. Here it comes. You seen that it's destroyed watermelons? It's crazy. They just chump through a watermelon. They're huge. So yeah, so he thought, hey, this will be convincing. And the Daily Mail dropped. So it was a whole thing. And he was pretty mad about it. And so in January 1934, he or no, in April 1934, he hires a surgeon. And the surgeon sends the Daily Mail a photo that he takes on the surgeon. The locksmiths. Yeah. And it was this photo. And this photo, we actually had this. So this is taken by a known fraudster. No, this is taken by a well-known, well-reveared surgeon who was hired by a known fraudster. That's what I'm saying, though. You know, I mean, like the fraudster gives him this. Yeah. Yeah. So the fraudster frauded this. Yeah. And they know about the pleasy store. And so here's the thing. We had the, this is a cropped in version of the image. This is the one you see everywhere, but we have a wider image. And when you see this wider image, you start to realize how small this is next to the wakes and the water. Yeah. Kind of get a frame. And what we actually know, and we have known for a long time, actually. Is that this is a duck? Is that this is a toy submarine that they took a little bit of wood clay. And they formed that head to look like a pleasy store because we already knew about the pleasy store. There was already the myth that it was a sore. So the fraudster. And they pushed this out into the lake. And they took that photo. And because he was like, he's like, I want to get a good photo, and I want to kind of stick it to him. And so this, even though we know now, infamous photo, this infamous photo is a toy submarine made to look like a dinosaur. And did he admit this? Eventually, how do we know that? Somebody in his group revealed the story. And so we know now. But here's the thing that has been known for a long time. And it has not really dissuaded any believers because the the storyline existed before this photo. Sure. It wasn't like this photo was the first appearance of the mythology. Right. Right. And so that what the believers say is like, oh, yeah, that is a myth. That is not real. That's a fraud. But the the Loch Ness monster is still. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he made that up. But day. So we put a submarine out into the water, a little clay head. And we took a picture of it. And everyone there became a Christian. And a little while after that, another journalist, and this kind of became a thing for a little bit. And people were faking stuff. While an Italian journalist, he received a story about a fisherman who captured who caught a strange fish in Loch Ness. And he was going to break the story. But he's like, there's not really a lot to this story. And so he just edited the strange fist to the Loch Ness monster. And kind of he's founded on that mythology of it to stretch it and make it a story. So started being some things like that that would go on to kind of stretch the story. But what's interesting is in the late 80s, a marine biologist by the name of you guess. Oh, yeah, I like this guy. He looks like he belongs in the sea. Shamish. Oh, I like that guess. I like that guess, actually. Yeah, what's his name? Adrian Shine. What is it? Adrian Shine. I like the name Adrian too. Yeah. If you're if you're listening, he's a guy, one of those guys who his beard doesn't stop. It goes all the way around the top of his head. And he's got a, is he got his hair and a ponytail back there? Yeah, he's got long flowing hair. Yeah. So this is hot Santa. Yeah, this is kind of hot Santa. He's thin, he's got a green suit on. And it's a tailored light. It's like a good suit. Good. And he's like sitting on the bridge. He's sitting like he belongs on this boat. Yeah, yeah. He's sitting like, yeah, yeah, exactly. And the wind is blowing his beard and his hair. It's very majestic. I mean, you can tell, like you can just tell from looking at this picture underneath his arms are probably super hairy. He's spent 50 years studying Loch Ness, not specifically, like he's a marine biologist, not a nessie person. Okay. And so he's like, he's like, I've studied the lake. I know what's in the lake. I know what's here. Yeah. And so he was like, I want to, like, there's this mythology that there's something going on. He's like, he's like, we had the technology. We can figure out what's going on in this lake. What year is this? 87. He puts together an operation deep scan. This was a million dollar project operation. And what they did is they took a flotilla of 24 boats and fired sonar to the bottom of the lake and just drove information across the whole lake to capture a full image of operation deep scan. And so we actually have photos of this and progress, which in real life, it looks a lot less majestic than that. Then that picture, this looks like it was going to be like a freaking super cool. The Star Wars Imperial Armada. Yeah. And the real life photo is they can't even drive in a straight line. This is just freaking lake of the Ozarks on any weekend. Yeah. But yeah. So they went out across. They did this scan. And what's interesting is we get a full picture of the bottom of the floor and everything. So even if like something's died, we would see anything in there, at least from a large lump. And they did handle they did capture a handful of anomalies that were larger than a shark that they were like, we don't know exactly what this is. And so they did this whole thing. They took note of where these anomalies were located. And then they went back again and a handful of them were still there. So they were like, okay, this is probably like a rock or some debris that's caught on something. But a few of them were not in the location that they expected so they had moved. And so it's still possible that that's debris. It's also possible that that's some other like there is a river that feeds this. So it's possible some other large marine sea creature could have got in there. Yeah. And then got out and they don't know for sure what they are. But there is it's also possible. There's the Loch Ness Monster. It could be the Loch Ness Monster. And so he did this in his kind of conclusion is that we have no real good evidence that there's anything in there that could be the Loch Ness Monster from this. And so shortly after that, let's see what was this? Oh, this was quite a long demo after that. 2018. Another professor, excuse me, guess his name? Archibald. Oh, close. Neil. Neil Gemmell. Neil Gemmell decided to do a large-scale DNA scan of the lake. Sure. To understand what the lake. If you show me that, I would have said, Neil. He looks like the vocalist of the smashing pumpkins to me. Yeah. Yeah. He does look like if Bill Burr shaved, which is what the vocalist of the smashing pumpkins looks like. Yeah. He does look like the vocalist from smashing pumpkins. So he does this DNA study. Related. It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. Sorry, Bill. Have you know that story? I know that thing got mad about something. Bill got mad about it. Okay. The guy from the smashing pumpkins thinks it's funny, but Bill got annoyed. He was like, you're not my brother. Well, there's like, they don't know their dads. They don't know their dads, and they look a lot alike. Oh, yeah. And so there's like an online theory that they're really living. They don't. I said to the email that James Corden, and I was like, you think, do you think we're really funny to say that to random people. We don't look at anything like, hello. I'd be like, picture attached. And Gordon James Gmail. Picture attached to my DNA, and also a picture of myself. Today's newspaper. So, okay, what did he find in this DNA stuff? So he comes out and he says, there's absolutely zero reptile, sturgeon, or catfish DNA found in the lock. But the interesting thing is there are extraordinary amounts of European eel DNA. And so they, what they hypothesize is through doing a little statistical analysis, they said that there's probably a one in 50,000 chance that there is a one meter eel somewhere in the lock. And they said that this stock of how many eels must be in the lock for that large of a DNA sample to be president. It's almost a guarantee that there are at least one if not multiple meter long eels swimming around three feet. Yeah. So they're not in the lock, which that's big enough, which if you saw that peeking out of the water, you're looking for a lock nest monster. Potentially, that could make you think that something's three feet, three feet. Yeah. How thick do you think an eel is? Some eels are pretty thick. I've seen snakes sticking up from the water and I go, I don't go, oh my gosh. That's the lock nest monster. Yeah, but there's not something about, like if you're out, if you're a link of the Ozarks, there's no mythology about a monster being in there. If you have a lot of lock nest, there's the mythology. And so there's kind of the suggestion of I hate when I see snakes on the water. Yeah, there's nothing worse. That freaks me out. Nothing worse. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing worse. Nothing worse. There's nothing worse than seeing a snake on the water. Sorry, my pediatricians have been telling me that. Nothing worse. I'm not seeing my S's and say more S words. It's a Nessie 8. The pediatrician. Yeah, you're just saying more S words. It's pre-repeated. A pediatrician. My, my assistant. Please leave us a review. And join us on Patreon. We're a very good at podcasting. No, I do think I do think there is something about the power of suggestion and something about like you expect to see that thing there. And so we brought this up. I don't know if this is last episode of the episode before or I was I said I've been asking people with the last of you see a demon in your room. And I and I like genuinely the last time this has happened to me was I was in high school, but especially in that era of my life, like that was an expectation I had. I'm gonna see a demon. I'm gonna wake up. I'm gonna see a demon. That's an expectation that I have. I was like really big in like the Pentecostal spiritual warfare world where I was like I'm just surrounded by the demons at all times. And so like that was like where my brain was. And so I saw them everywhere I went. But I didn't actually. There's no demons here. I was supposed to sleep without any. So there's no demons after me. Everything I'm facing is just the consequences of my own actions. No, but there's something. I'm in so much credit card debt because I'm being attacked by demons. Hello, can you please forgive my credit card debt? It's the demons fault. And I think if you're I think if you're a load of just you hear that you kind of have to be like, Oh yeah, sorry. Yeah, well, you're not accountable for your mock that out. No, there's something to that where it's like if your brain is in that headspace. Sure. And you're in a place where you expect to see that thing. If something is close enough, your brain fills in the gaps. Sure. And so I think that there is this, I mean, now 1500 year mythology around. We haven't done another scan. Not to the scale of the deep scan. Basically, where we're at at this point is it seems like this initial story was just a tall tale from the monk thing from the 500s from the 500s. There's just some tall tale. And that built a myth. Yeah. And that myth eventually was revived. I also think it could be one of those things where it's like, you know, a bigger sea animal or something that came into the lock. And then left. Yeah, when there wasn't more food for it. Yeah, I mean, the lock is a ridiculously deep lock, right? I think it's like 700 feet deep. And I don't know the the river that feeds. Yeah. And we grew up near the lock of the Ozarks and or table table lock lock. Table lock lock. Table lock lock. They will lock lock. The lake is deep enough to support large my life. Could they get through? Could they get in? Maybe if like the river swelled and stayed at a high enough average depth. Sure. Yeah. That's why I would be like, okay, once every 100 years, you see something like that. Yeah. Yeah. I think that like that's conceivable for sure. Sure. And I think it's also possible that there are like larger fish or because I do genuinely think like if a fish were to grow to the right size or an eel were to grow to the right size, I think your brain would just kind of say, that's lockness monster. Or a tree branch has been suggested a little bit. Oh, sure. And again, if you are expecting to see that and the weather conditions were just right, you know, it's just rocky enough. The water's just just rocky enough than maybe your brain just fills in the gaps and says that's that's what that is. But ultimately, I do think this is a true story, though, that the, yes, the monk cult. Halt. Thou shalt not pass. I love that he's a, it's do not touch the man. Do not touch the man. Return to the sea. And everybody. Also, I like that he uses friend as bait. That's crazy that this monk was like did not there. Go out there. Go out there. For what? For what? He knows there's like dead guy being buried behind him. We tell his friend. Another theory is that it was a circus elephant because circuses were common in that era and that's let the elephant swim in the water. And this is what an elephant looks like when it's swimming. So it's pretty lockness monster. It's pretty lockness monster. It feels kind of small though. Of course swans and yeah, that's what I thought the original picture was. And if that's far away, and it's a rainy cloudy day, like, you know, and if it's a big and you're kind of dumb. Yeah. You're just driving drunk next to the lockness. Also, if you were supposed to be wearing glasses and you didn't wear glasses. Sure. Nobody had glasses. Did you see that? Have we talked about that guy? He said that. It was a podcast recently. They're clipping their role. He said, I think most of like the dragons and monsters from like any time before the current era was just people couldn't see because we didn't also we talked about in our ghost episode. The number of ghosts that it's just like you just had candlelight of course. You know, of course you see flickering things and stuff in the corner. Yeah. Yeah. And you lived in a world where you constantly saw things that you never saw before. Like right now, it is so unnatural for me to know about giraffes. I should not know about giraffes. That's true. And so the so buff you before we had this like globally connected world to see, to travel was to see things you have never seen before. And then you go back and tell people about that. And then they would tell people about that. And so it's like it's really understandable how these mythologies arose because people just didn't see things like we do. We see too much. That's interesting. I shouldn't know about hippos. Yeah. I shouldn't know about the devil getting fiddled off. Hey, thanks for being here for this episode of Things On The Last Night. If you liked it, please share it. Tell somebody about the show. Please, please, please spread the mythology of Dylan to the world. And then we also did an episode about eels. When we recorded the episode, there was some information that now exists that did not exist then. We at the time of recording that episode science did not know where eels came from. Yeah. And so we talked about the whole the theories that existed throughout all the history. And then have we done an update on that before? I don't think we have. Oh, well, bummer. And so go check that out. It's a great episode. Also, next week's episode is available right now on Patreon. Please join us. We do monthly hangouts. We would love to see you in the hangout with us. This one's going to be fun because it's October, Halloween time. Yeah. And so join the hangout. Come say hi. Introduce yourself and come hang out with us. So we'll see you next time. We'll see you next time. Okay. Great.


Imagine you’re at a funeral in the Scottish Highlands in 565 AD. You’re mourning a friend who was just killed by a water monster, when suddenly a monk shouts, “Hey, why don’t you swim across the lake and see if we can get that monster out of there!” And one of you… actually does it. This is where the legend … Read More

655,000 Men Went Into Russia. 93,000 Came Out | Napoleon Bonaparte

10-06-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, not real. Yeah, before we start this episode, would you punch me in the mouth? I mean, just get me started real quick, just punch me in the mouth. Come on. Come on. Hit me. Hit me. You imagine, just like, you're just bloody. Confirmed there is this accounts are going to happen. There is a decision. Right. Thanks. That's really. Hey, Tim. What's up? I'm happy to be here. Sorry, I just yelled it and then I was like, oh, shoot, we saw that lady walk in and she seemed really sad. Oh, no. Well, what are you going to do? Not our fault they put us next to the counselor's office. We picked it. We had we had options. You know, it's pretty good. Like start the episode. Have you ever heard of a Napoleon Bonaparte? Oh, for real. Yeah, that's so funny that they, you know, we said this last week, and you've taken a whole week to look into all this. Yeah, to prepare. I have heard of Napoleon Bonaparte. Yeah. Yeah. I've never realized in this, this is a very famous picture of Napoleon. They made him really big compared to the horse. That is that would be a tiny horse. That would be a very tiny horse. That would be a, that would be tiny. But I also just noticed that his name is carved into that rock. I've never noticed that, which is an interesting touch. Oh, it is. He do that. Did he get off the rock? That's interesting. Or so what about Napoleon? Interesting. We'll get this out of the way right up front. Not a small guy. He's five seven, which is average high. Actually, kind of like a normal size, like a normal borderline big guy. You know, some, in some cultures, he would be like a large guy. I will say, I will say at the time, people act like five sevens are that big, but it's pretty big. Actually, let me like look at about this horse. Look at the big horse. That's a five seven man. That's a five seven man. Oh, I would like to see, I would like to see you carve your name in a rock. All right. On a horseback. And then Galovant off and also very cool. Look back at the painter and hold that pose long enough for the painter to catch it. Put me in charge and I'll make this happen. I'll make prisoner presidents. Prisoner, president. Yeah, one was a citizen. Citizen soldier. Health captivates me for education. And VA benefits from the life. Things I learned last night. Tim, wake up a little bit, buddy. Sorry, take a breath. Take a breath. Have you? No, here's the thing. I said the five seven thing and it makes it seem like I was joking, but I'm dead. I want to go back. Actually, did you know how tall like gladiators were? Look up the average height of like a Roman gladiator. I bet it's small. They got to fit in all that stuff. What? We got to fit in all that armor. So like when I went to Pompeii and you know, you see the where they where they lived. Yeah. Doorways are pretty short. What's the average height? Average height was five five. Shorter than Napoleon. Yeah. Well, what's interesting is like in researching this they actually said like five seven was like the upper end of the average for France at the time. So like he actually was like a taller guy. Why are we getting taller? I don't know. Is the gravitational pull from the sun pulling us closer to the sun? Why are we getting taller? What's happening? Stretching us. The sun is stretching us. Oh. Why are we getting taller? Better nutrition, less disease. I just had better nutrition than you. No, than children or what? Yeah, I have better nutrition than children for sure. It's allowing people to reach their full genetic height potentials, what it says. And so it says like, What's my genetic height? Is that in my 23 and me? Your genetic height potential is six, seven. Whoa. Well, I think what I think the point is like before nutrition was so bad disease was so popular. True. Not popular. Common. True. That like, it would. It was pretty popular. Oh, yeah. It was shorter. It would prevent people from reaching their full potential. He's got the black death. It's so cool. So fetch. So fetch. We're trying to make fetch happen. Okay, so five, seven. Tall guy. Big. Big guy. My name is Napoleon Bono Park. What is that from? I never heard it before. You never heard that? My name is Napoleon Bono Park. Maybe it's from that Lewis and Clark musical. Well, I mean, it was happening the same time. You googling the Lewis and Clark musical I did as a kid. Yes. Clark. Clark and Lewis song. Here we go. The ballad of Lewis and Clark. What's this from? This is K the rate music. Here we go. Oh, it's actually. Now, would you rather walk into a restroom and me be listening to the screaming video or that? Screaming for sure. This is not the song. This is not the song. This is not the song. Do you think that that is copyright? Are we allowed to be playing this as much? There's no. No. I want like the Lewis and Clark. Clark and Lewis. Ba da da da da da da da da da da da. Hey, guys. Here's Reddit. Hey, guys. This is a song I heard back in fourth grade. And I still remember a lot of the lyrics, but I can't find this song anywhere. And the top comment is, oh, that's too bad. All right. I'll find it later. That's too bad. That's too bad. Okay. 5.7 Napoleon. No for me in short. Why did we just start making fun of him for me in short that how tall was George Washington? Crazy, right? 6.1. I think it's like, if you're going to tell me right now that our country was founded by people under six foot. George Washington, it was 6.2. That's right. It's what I'm saying. It said he was very tall for his time. Most, most men in the 18th century averaged 5.6. Yeah. So he was a giant, which is probably why they let him be a child. Yeah. They were like, you should be, you should run this thing. They're like, you should be the, you should be the man of the house. The teeth are crazy. So. I think the man of the house. Yeah. The petitioner redeemed presidency of the man of the house. We're running for man of the house. We just ended up electing the harriest armed guy. I'm running for man of the house. You would not get elected. You would not get elected. Why have harrier arms? I'm 5.7. Look at our arms. Who's got harrier arms? Vote in the comments. I shave my arms. Just kidding. I have before though, when I first got tattoos, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they do look better when you don't have the hair. Right. Right. As opposed to it. Doesn't look better when you're stronger. Yeah, they do look better. Do you want me to be supportive or honest? So talk guy. Talk. Talk about an Napoleon. Yeah. Well, I should say talk guy. Upper end of average guy. Upper end of average guy. It was born in 1769. We've spent seven minutes on a hike. Just want to cover that real quick. Well, we cut a little bit of the beginning stuff before you get up. You probably might not get up. No. You'll get up here in the screen. But, uh, which the weird screen we cut out. So you don't even know what we're talking about. We left the part where I yelled at me. But then I did a weird scream. And he was so conscious. You see, we got to cut that, Robert. You got to cut that. We argued about it. But we got to decide it was. It was decided. Robyn got best for I guess. Not good for the brand. Okay. So, we're going to do a lot more episodes today. Okay. We're going to do a lot more episodes today. He was born in Corsica, France, do you know what that is? Yep. Oh yeah, you've been cruising. You've been cruising that a trainian. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Corsica. Actually, what date does this come out? This will be October. Oh, will it? Okay. Yeah, this will be, I think, the second week of October, I think. Oh, okay, nevermind. First or second week of October. I was gonna say, well, maybe, I think when this comes out, I might be on a cruise. Nice. I was just in Italy when you're listening to this. Nice. So. Well, Corsica is, if you're not familiar, it is an island, honestly, off the coast of Italy. This is Corsica. It's really off the course of Italy. Yeah. I mean, it's close to France, I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's a French island. So I was just right there. Nice. I want to drown you in the sea. So, yeah, it's like a low island off there. He's born there. Yeah, he was born there. And born in a consequential time in history, 1769, there's a lot going on in the world. United States happens a couple of years after this. And so does the French Revolution. Yes. Bigger deal for him than the United States was. And so obviously, French Revolution, very quick, all the rich people got their heads cut off. That's it. And so power turns over. Meanwhile, he is kind of raised a mama's boy. I think there's a lot of things about him that kind of make him have like a bad reputation. I think the mama's boy thing, like he really loved his mom. He talked about her for years after he grew up like had a great, honestly, it feels like, and this is going to be a weird comparison. But Lucille Bluth and what's her son? Yeah, I have to hook. Yes, Captain Hook. The relationship that they have, I feel like that is the type of relationship. Except for, that was more of a failure to launch. So it's like they had that kind of relationship, but it was more like she was holding him back throughout his youth. Sure. And then eventually she let him go. And when she... You might think it might be more like, I don't know, Elon Musk and his mom. I have no idea what his relationship was like with his mom. You don't? No, damn. A weird relationship. It's really time to gander. It's very weird. Okay. Yeah. So he had a very close relationship with his mom, and he talked a lot about how like she kept him in check and she, like, instilled discipline in him. Yeah. But then he moves to France to go to a Catholic school where he is supposed to learn French because he only speaks Italian and of course again. And so he's going to go to France to kind of broaden his horizons educationally. Okay. Internally. And then he's there for a couple of years. My favorite thing about listening back to the episodes is that you'll say something really weird. And then I'll be like making breakfast or something, listening, quality controlling the episodes. I do that. I quality control it. So by the time you're hearing this, I've made it. This is what I thought was sort of... Wow. You listen to a control quality subject to a controlled podcast. So I will hear you go educationally, and then out loud while I'm making breakfast, I'll go, I can't handle it. At the same time, I'm like, do it here, and I'll be like, oh yeah, good. I nailed it. I've done that a lot too, like listening back, I'll say stuff at the same time, I'll say something. Yeah. He always responds to you bullying me, and I'll be like, oh, hey, sorry, I'm not bullying you. I would never be in this. This is the internet. You're cyber bullying. Read the comments. Post a comment, leave a review about how Jaren's actually super nice. My favorite thing about the podcast is how nice Jaren is to his co-host. It's very good. Jaren has this much patience with him. This much patience. Hey guys, do you want me to be supportive or do you be clear? Do you be clear? When you leave reviews for a podcast, supportive, supportive, supportive, don't be honest. Don't be honest, don't be honest. You can send me a DM and be honest. You can DM us if you're with your real thoughts, but when you're leaving reviews, supportive, supportive, please support us. And also share the podcast with somebody. Okay. Jaren likes his mama. Yeah. Name is Napoleon. He goes to the mainland. He goes to the mainland. He goes to the mainland where he learns French and then he enrolls in military school essentially. Yeah, obviously. And so he guards you some military school as a lieutenant in the military. And this is in the middle of the coalition wars. So the coalition wars were an interesting time in Europe where France was, the French coalition happens. Yeah. And France starts to get a little expansionary like the new government is like, what if they were like? What if we were bigger? Bigger. Yeah. And so it always happens. Yeah. And so they. Animal Farm really is like an accurate depiction of what happens when the people in the oppressed get into power. It is really. And then all of a sudden they become the power. It happens basically every time. It's wild. Yeah. And so it happens basically every time. Wolf. So the rest of Europe puts together the coalition. Yeah. And we had this series of like, it's a lot. It's like seven or eight coalition wars where different nations band together to kind of take on France. And so this is happening when Napoleon is like starting his military career. In his 20s. Yeah. Well, actually in his late teens. Yeah. And so he he becomes a lieutenant in the military and he's a part of this the coalition wars. And he has some early military success as a lieutenant in the war and he starts to climb the ranks in the army until eventually in 1799 he. I hate that last week. I was like, but you don't know about Napoleon and you were like, that's a good idea. Really annoying me right now. I was planning it. Yeah. I know. I planned it already. I think this was my plan. The start. Wait to you. I could be honest. If you that episode I've got planned next, if you can manage, here's let's do this. This will be fun. If you can manage to do this same thing for next week's episode, I don't know what I'll do. That'll be crazy. Okay. But I really want to see if you can figure it out. Leave me a comment below. Right now. I want to see what you guys. Right now what you think. I've done it. I've done it. I've done it. I've done it. One two punch here. Am I going to one two punch again? I will say it is like. It'd be a one two. That'd be a third punch. One two three punch. It is kind of related. There is like a there's a tie. It's a loose tie. But there's a tie. Okay. For next week's episode. So we'll see if we'll see if anyone can get it. All right. I'll see if I can get it. So 1799 rolls around. He's been doing the coalition wars and he's having some success in it. He's climbed the ranks. And I don't know if he's technically a general at this point. He's definitely a high ranking military officer at this point. And he is kind of realizing there's this the power should be his. He's like, I should be in charge. Right. And especially from the military strategy standpoint, but also from just kind of like France. Just kind of like the I should run this. Yeah. And so in November 9th, 1799, he wakes up at 5 a.m. and says it's time. And so it's time also and I've said this before, anybody who wants to be in charge should immediately be disqualified from being in charge of any organization, of any government. If you're the person who's like, I think I should be in charge of this. No. I think we should have a system where we find the person most qualified, but least wants to do it. And we should force them to do it, you know, that's who I think should be the pastor of every church. Yep. I think that's who we should find a person who's like, yeah, I mean like here's my ideas on foreign policy and you know, how we could build back the Fed and try to handle some of this debt situation. And then you go, you want to be in charge and they go, oh, no, I would never want to do that. Shackle him and screaming and then take him and now there are prisoner presidents, prisoner presidents. Hey, actually put me in charge and I'll make this happen. I'll make president presidents. I will make prisoner presidents a thing. Presider president sounds like real quick, would you punch me in the face? Presider president sounds like a 2003 CCM punk band, like they were like trying to sound punk. It also sounds like that song by three doors down, president, yeah, what was that citizen soldier held captive by his need for education and VA benefits for our life. We got him. That was that guy. That was the turn. Sorry. So he wakes up at 5 a.m. and he tells his wife he's married now by the way, a woman named Josephine. Yeah. He wakes up. Hey, Josephine. It's time. He's like, hey, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, how do you wake your wife up? I don't wake my wife up. I'd never do that. Yeah, you're afraid of that. You're afraid of what happens? Never wake my wife up. Bad move. I will say now that we have a son, it's gotten easier if I need to wake up. Because you just go, hey, no, I bring him in and I drop him on her and then she's excited to see him. But you go up and then you run and you shut the door. Yeah. Hey, we just reduced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live hangouts. You get to join the Discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so, but also the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. No. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody you like the show and thanks for being here for this episode. Yeah, how do you wake your wife up? I go, you're on fire, you're on fire. It's fun. That's insane. I wish our pet can work because there was one morning, I don't know what happened, but I woke up and our room was like the humidity in our room was so thick or something. And I really was like, fire, fire, fire, and I got up and ran downstairs to see what's on fire. And I was like, nothing's what? And then I went back out of the room and the room was clear, so I just looked crazy. Sorry, nothing's on fire. I don't know. I don't know. The light was hitting in the room through the sunlight coming through the blinds. We have blinds, we're poor. And so, like, British people don't have blinds. It's true. So anyway, so I did wake her up like that one morning. Interesting. She goes right back to sleep, but it's a talent that my wife has. She really does have a talent for it. That's what I do. I can sleep pretty quickly. No, I can't. I can't. It takes me a half an hour to fall asleep. So Reagan's afraid to wake you up then. No. I mean, I'm not grumpy in the morning. That's the other thing too. I'm a morning person. She's not even an afternoon person. This woman doesn't come alive until 7.30 pm. I'm not even joking, dude. And at 9 o'clock, we call him the 9 o'clock. Yeah. Because at 9 o'clock, it's like, all right, hey, you ready to start whining down? And she's like, no. She would run six miles at 9 pm if it was up to her. That's crazy. Yeah. OK, so he goes, hey, JoJo. Yeah, he's like, he's like JoJo. It's time for me to take over. It's time. And she's like, take over what you talking about more. You're going to do more chores finally, finally do some work around this house. And he's like, no, no, I'm 5'7 go marry a 5'4 guy. If you want to, if you want to do it, lose your leg, remember that I'm the catch, remember that I'm the catch. I also tell my wife that. So he tells me I'm the catch. He tells Josephine. Hey, here's a couple guys. I need you to take the breakfast, which are like guys in like the, their version of like the parliament. OK. And he knows are not going to side with him. And he's like, he's like, I need you to take them to breakfast. And then he invites everybody else to a meeting. OK. And he basically is like, I want to be in charge. And so here's how this is going to go. And so he basically puts forward a legal road to like create, basically a coup from the inside. Yeah. That's the right people. And so you make sure only the right people are in the room for this meeting. And he slowly like rolls it out through the course of the day and there is like timelines you can find online where it's like the meeting begins at eight. And then the right people are, are brought in, everyone agrees. They take their vote. Then they move on to the bigger group, the bigger group until eventually at 2 a.m. the following morning. He's got the majority day passed the, the ruling where he is now the consulate, the Supreme Consulate. And so there's two other consulates. And so they're kind of like three presidents, but it's like he's the president. And so he's like, he's like, we did it, I'm in charge now. And so he lays down on the bed and he's like, all the days work. Kind of. And so he begins a couple of things start to happen over the next couple of years. He begins to roll out and eventually in 1804 releases the code civil or what's also known as the Napoleonic code, which is a legal code that he orchestrated, which is really interesting because this legal framework that he adopts has later been adopted by at least 120 countries in some way, shape or form. Okay. And so he kind of has shaped like the way the law looks for the majority of the world to this day is at least foundationally tied to this code that he came up with in 1804. And these were things like laws need to be like duly published and applied. And so like it's like, you can't just say it this, you have to be able to enforce it. And there has to be judges have to, they can, they cannot refuse laws to be enforced. Because coming out of the French Revolution and even before the French Revolution in a feudal state, a lot of these regional lords had too much say about what happened in their region. And so you would be in one neighborhood. You know, almost like different laws for different areas. Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of like how like right now in the States there are certain laws where you cross state line and it's like, now this is a legal. It is crazy. It's like, you know, to see people still getting arrested for any amount of marijuana on them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's the same sort of thing. But in France, being a smaller country, like this literally was in some areas. It was like neighborhoods where it's like, you just kind of go into another neighborhood. And now the laws are different. Right. And so he's kind of ratifying this like national law that was like, you cannot federal law. Yeah. You cannot enforce, you cannot pick and choose what you enforce. Everything is enforceable everywhere. Which was kind of radical at the time. And he started to put together, I should say put together. He invested in and moved forward a lot of enlightenment era policies. Yeah. So there's a lot of things. Into the 1700s. Yeah. So there's a lot of a lot of things he pushed forward that led to a lot of the arts. Like the arts in France became a really big deal, but also sciences. And so he had a pretty big impact in this role. But also taken over stuff. He kind of was like, I want to be like, I was going to the great. Yeah. And so. I don't know. It's an interesting idea. Interesting idea is not good idea. Okay, we're going to get there. We're going to get there. We're going to get there. Let's figure it out. And then. You're going to do it about Catherine. The great. Oh, interesting. That's interesting. I haven't thought about that. I don't. Catherine's earlier though. Yeah. She's like 20 years earlier than that. She's like late late. So 30 years. 1770s. Interesting. Interesting. 1760s. Interesting. You didn't know that. So that means that's not the episode. Oh, man. So then a real road. Well, interesting. Like quite a. Well, I mean, it's not that far off. Not that far off. Interesting. I feel like you're good. Okay. Anyways. So I'm going to get it. The. We're going to launch it between this. And you're going to choose one of the ideas. And I said, and then you're going to pretend that I got it. That's how I know. That's how much I know you. So he's he begins to continue his expansionism. Okay. And he's battling wars against the coalition wars are still going on. I think at this point, we're now rolling into the third coalition. When he gets what is pretty widely considered one of his great victories in the battle of Austro-Litz. And so this is a war between Austrian Russian forces where he just decimates them, gets a massive new victory. You're going to do it on North Korea. No. Because I asked you to do that last week. Did you? Wouldn't it be a good episode about North Korea? Alex doesn't care at all. Alex just. Alex is like, did you ask Alex Alex did the thing my wife does where she goes? Um, it's afternoon. It's an afternoon yet. I mean, whatever you want to do, it's fun. You want to do a North Korea shirt. Okay. Sorry. Didn't eat. I interrupted you hard. And so this battle leads to him being able to make the treaty of the treaties of Tilsit between Russia and Russia. And what this was was they were going to join in an economic blockade of Great Britain. Right. And so now they kind of, he started to align with some of the other coalition forces that he was defeating. Yes. And not only was he aligning with some, he was now being able in certain situations to overtake some nations and install puppet leaders, which were always his brothers. Um, and so he's like. You think the literal brothers? Yeah, his literal brothers. Um, and so. He's like, you guys came from the same mom and she's the best. So that's how I know you're. That's how I know you're also. That's how I know you're great. Because you came from the greatest. Braised woman. Ever existed. So in, uh, in, let me see. It would be in 1807, I believe. Oh, no, he did this. He did this at the end of 1804. So he, he took over the beginning of 1804 by the end of 1804. He, he takes himself from consulate to emperor. He crowns himself the emperor of France. And we have this incredible painting called, uh, the coronation of Napoleon. Yeah. And so in this painting, it's interesting to me why they chose to do this the way they chose it. But this is Josephine kneeling before him and she, he's crowning her empress. Um, but he actually crowned himself emperor. Um, which a lot of Europe was like. I don't know how that goes. Yeah. Okay. Um, and he just becomes like fully. Yeah. Like, like Roman, I am God type of emperor attitude. Also, I want to point out in this painting. He's there. A little pointer. He's got the, the videos of the, you know, the video where the guy taps the screen. He breaks the screen with a little finger pointer thing. He has that where he goes huge one. Like a giant one with a hand with a pointer finger at the top. Yeah. So this looks like I didn't read because there's three hands on it, but it's not. Yeah. It's just his pointer finger. Huh. I love it. Um, and so he from here, it goes from like zero to a hundred his conquests. He is going not just across Europe, but into the Middle East into Northern Africa. And he is, uh, he does the Louisiana purchase in 1804 to fund this. He's like, he's like, oh, I can sell a good chunk of our, our territory in the, in the Americas to fund what I want to do over here, which is be the next. That was integrate. Yes. And so a lot of this becomes like, he just wants to be. He wants to be remembered as like a conqueror as a great emperor. Well. And we remember you was short. So, uh, what's interesting is in the 1808, remember you was a tiny little guy. And Napoleon was a wee little man and a wee little man was he. That's the song, right? Is it Napoleon? Who is that who? Are you serious? Which one of us has a has a Bible? Oh, it's a kiss. Napoleon hit fit. I, that's why I did it. I know what's it. I'm sorry. We did it study nursery songs in my college classes. Oh, we did. That's probably why I floaked out. I was in the different classes that had been in control. They put me, they put you in the Bible courses. And then I took the, the nursery. And they were like, I have, have we got a last for you. And it was just the adult studies daycare. And I was like, this is awesome. This place is great. They got blocks. Thanks. A little gummy snacks. Oh, you guys got blocks. This is cool. This is, this place is sick. I made, you know. You came back to the dorms and shut everyone in your colors. Yeah. I'm going to color this. I colored this today. And they were like, cool, Jared. Was that your homework? Yeah. I didn't, I did it in class. It was classwork. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy. In 1808, he invades Spain. And he triggers like the actual collapse of the Spanish royal. Yeah. He puts his brother in charge of Spain. And what's interesting about this is this triggers a collapse through Spanish, the Spanish Latin America and Latin American occupation. Because all of these nations were like, we're not going to follow that guy. That guy is not our leader. The other guy was. He's gone. Sure. So we're kind of our own thing now. Yeah. And because it was so far away. And because Napoleon didn't really care about what was going on. It was a work away. He was really kind of focused on his. This ground for triggered Mexican independence. And a lot of other Latin American nations were able to begin laying the ground works for their third later road. Independence. Right. So really interesting, consequential, like outcome of his invasion of Spain. By 1809, we roll into the war of the fifth coalition. And so now it is Great Britain, Austria, Sardinia, Spain, Sicily, and the Black Brunswickers, which I don't know what that is, all fighting against France to take them down. And so what's really interesting about these coalition wars. And France was like behind Napoleon. Yeah. And we're like, this is our guy. Yes, yes. It was really interesting. Like in this era, there was like a French nationalism that had a... Well, they had also just, you know, 40 years before that taken down. Yeah. What they saw as an impressive regime, that was on the back. And he did, if you were French in this era, it was a pretty good time. Unless you were like a soldier and you were fighting the war. Pretty good time. Because like he did. He like really, the arts, the sciences, everything was getting elevated. Their economy was thriving because they have this war they're making a lot of money off of. Right. And he is pillaging. Like pillaging, like crazy. The Louvre, the good chunk of what's in the Louvre to this day, is Napoleon's pillaging. The stuff he stole. Yeah, throughout all of that whole Mediterranean world that he was invading. And so they were becoming very... They were becoming a superpower. Yeah, they were a superpower. They were probably the preeminent superpower during this moment. Yes. But during this moment. And so if you're French in this moment, I think you were proud. I think there was like a nationalism that had a rose. For the majority of French people. Yeah. If you weren't French, you hated the French. Yeah. Or you were begrudgingly like working with them. It was kind of like, well, they're the ones that are in charge we kind of have to right now. Yeah. But like you weren't excited about it, you know? And so this huge, huge swath of Europe was fighting back against them. And it's interesting to kind of look at it because really if you think about it, this is kind of like a world war moment where there is this massive conflict for Europe. Even the greater Mediterranean, Northern Africa, Britain saw this opportunity. We're going to talk about this last week. But Britain saw this opportunity to go actually take over a good chunk of India. And so like a lot of the combination, colonization of India happened in this moment because they saw, oh, there's less the empires that were active in that day. We're moving up into the Middle East to defend the lands of the Middle East. Right. And so they were able to then gain control over India. Likewise, Russia, Great Britain and the French were all coalescing in the Middle East as this kind of like trade central route of like we all need to fortify this area. Sure. And so there was a lot of both colonization happening in this moment and also like changing of hands of power in this moment. Most of that section of the world was at war. And then we just in the last episode learned about everything that was happening in the United States. And then also there's revolutions happening all across Latin America because of the power of actually creating it. It was just contagious in the late 1700s or 1800s. Yeah, it really was like a, I mean, I think like it's like the pre-World War. I mean, I think it's like whenever we move from feudalism to the next stage, where across the whole planet was monarchs and feudalism and power structures that existed for millennia before that. And then just getting dismantled in a pretty quick pace all in that window. Yeah, the marching forward of like progress in ways where like obviously like this was bloody and there was a lot of violence involved in a lot of this and a lot of people got the bad end of the deal in this situation. Death. Not just death, like there was a lot of slavery, a lot of like people's livelihoods were destroyed. It's like it wasn't just death, like a lot of suffering came out of it. But I do think like the world we know today that is not like under feudalism and monarchy and things like that came out of this. And whenever you see that, like you said, like there is the people who had power before, they don't give it up easily. Right. And so there is a push and there's also a traditionalist mindset where the people who like like you knew the world you had before. And it's like I kind of want to get back to that world, which is part of what Napoleon campaigned for. Like Napoleon was like remember what it was like before the tyrants that we just killed became tyrants. I remember what it was like. And so like he kind of there was a whole business nostalgic. Yeah, like yeah, let's bring back the great French France. Great. Like it really was kind of like I think he campaigned on again. I feel like we Maffa. Wait, no. No. Maffa. Maffa. The confidence. Maffa. Stupid. So you're a dumb guy. And Hey, October 22nd, we're doing till alive as part of the fountain scene. It's part of the fountain city comedy festival here in Kansas City. You got a tillin.com slash live for more information. You get passes. It's going to be more than just us. Oh, yeah. It's like legitimately not an advertisement right now. The festival is pretty sick. Like there's a really great lineup. A lot of really good comics. This thing's been growing a lot the past couple of years. So really cool to be the part of it. And so hopefully we'll see you there. Anyways, so he is he's conquesting. Yeah. And it kind of gets to a point where there's great Britain, but he's got great Britain kind of under control. Like they're not. They're not advancing. Yeah, they're not making cover in the ground. He's holding them back. And other than that, it's Russia. Everybody else has kind of bowed the need to him. And this is around 1812 June of 1812. And so he's like, is there a guy to get Russia? And he's like, I'm going to have to start. He's in charge in Russia right now. Peter Teal. Yes. No, the the Sara of Russia at that time was. I do know his name. Sara Alexander the first. Oh, Alexander. Peter's. Yeah, Alexander was Catherine's son. Oh, oh. Peter was who she was with her. My bad. And so. So he's like in in June of 1812. He's like, I'm going to go take Russia. I was here. Is that who we're going to talk about next now? See you next week. Talk about Alexander. So. I got him. That's how I know I got him. Not anymore. He's going to change it up. But for a second, I had him. So Napoleon goes into Russia in June of 1812. Alexander the great. And he's like, he's like, I'm going to get. I'm going to get Russia. I can overthrow the star. If I go into Moscow, I march into Moscow. It's what I do. It's what I do. I roll into places and they bow down to me. He didn't expect the Russians to be insane. To be crazy. Yeah. And so he rolls into Russia with an army of 655,000 soldiers. Now there's some context here too because speaking of moms, right? Yeah. Alexander's mom, Catherine. Yeah. Catherine came to power by overthrowing her own husband. Yeah. Right? So they're a crazy family. They are. And then you show up. And he's like, you don't know what I'm about to do. You know? Yeah. So they go into Russia and they start marching through Russia. And they're having a lot of success going through the beginning. Like the outer edges. Yeah. I'm a lot of success. The closer they get. In September of 1812, they fight the Battle of Boradino, which is just 60 miles outside of Moscow, which is obviously the destination of trying to get to the Capitol so they can overthrow the Tsar. And it's interesting because this was considered a French victory. But it was close because between the two of them, they had both last 68,000 soldiers. Yeah. So bloody battle. I think I mentioned it, but 655,000 soldiers who he brought with him into Russia. 655,000 soldiers. And this is a coalition now. This is, this is not just more than just this is this is Germans, this is Russia's because he has, this is Spaniards. He has overtaken these nations, installed his brothers and co-opted their armies. So now he's got this massive force marching through Russia. And as he nears Moscow, what's interesting is he. I think he, well, he rolls into Moscow. And we're coming into the winter months. And he rolls into Moscow. And he finds that Moscow is empty. There's not a person here. And it's also been burned to the ground. And what he finds out is Moscow said, we'll reach it to it. And they retreated and they set Moscow on fire. And they said, take it. They, they, that's what I'm saying. They were insane. They would scorch the earth. They said they said there's no chance that they can survive a Russian winter. And they said, let's make them do it. And so they retreated further into the Russian mainland. And they set their capital city on fire so there would be no resources. And, and everything's just destroyed. So they get there. They find an empty barren wasteland. But they also don't recognize is the, his forces, they're used to battling in Western Europe. And so what they typically do is they take this massive armada of horses. And the horses, what they normally do is they feed off the land. But in the Russian winter, that's not an option. There is not anything for these horses to feed off of. And the amount of horses that they brought with them, someone like historians have gone back and done the math, math. They needed four million pounds of feed a day for the horses that they had. So immediately the horses are starving to death. Yeah. And so by the end of this winter, they lose 200,000 horses. And they get to Moscow. They realize nothing's there. They, they set up camp. They try to figure out. They think about planning to move in, try to find them. Eventually, they decide to retreat. And by the time they make it out of Russia, force of 655,000 men was down to 93,000. Oh my gosh. And so this is the like great humiliation of Napoleon. And so he lost half a million men. Yeah. Trying to chase the Russians through Russia. And the Russians are just like, we're going to sit on fire before you. The Russians are like, good luck. Have fun in the snow. And so that's how I feel when out of state drivers are driving in Missouri during snowstorms. I'm just like, I'm like, I was born here. You don't know. Yeah. You don't know. Or like when I'm driving in California in the rain. Yeah. And it's just like, you guys are afraid of this. You have no idea what I've seen. You got no idea what I've been through. We used to put sandbags in the back of my pickup truck to weigh it down so I wouldn't spin out on the way to school. And so he begins. I've got 200,000 horses in the back of my Ford Ranger to weigh it down. So I don't spin that. So I don't spin out of the snow. So he begins marching back across Europe. And across Europe as he goes back, there are a handful of battles. You got a lot to get to. You don't want to bit about, you didn't want to bit about my Ford Ranger. So he. Sorry. He goes back. Sorry. You have something else to say about your Ford Ranger. I thought you were done. It seemed like you were done with that. Nope. Okay. He goes back. My wife quotes that song every time we see a Ford Ranger. The guy on TikTok. What's that? I know that truck. I'm no stranger. Yeah. Yeah. That's cool. I do like that. That's cool. All right. So for the next couple of years. The Russians basically chased Napoleon and his troops across Europe. Until he gets back to Paris. And he gets back to Paris and the French. What happened to happen to all of our friends? Yeah. The French are kind of like, hey man. That kind of sucked. I don't think this is working anymore. While you were gone, someone else kind of took charge. It's your brother. It's our step emperor. And we step for it. We kind of like a better kind of like a better. He's kind of like cooler than you. He's fishing. He's also ice cream. Five, seven and a half. Rich. He's got so much money. He drives the port. Our mom likes a lot. Yeah. So this your mom likes him a lot. And so they signed the Treaty of Fontaine Blue with basically the rest of Europe. That is like, hey, we're going to stop being real. Yeah, we're going to chill. And also we're going to kick that Napoleon guy out. That's kind of terms like he's can't be here anymore. Yeah. So he gets exiled to the island of Elba, which is an island in the middle of the Mediterranean with only 12,000 people on it. And they say you're going to stay there. And everything's going to be okay. And so this is the moment where the British are like, okay, Napoleon's gone now. And so like, let's go to the United States and go rough them up a little bit. Sure. And so he stays there for a touch. Louis, the 13th is placed as king. And so they decided to go back to a monarchy after this. They're like, this whole other thing we did was not a good idea. This day. And while he's there in Napoleon, eventually manages to escape the island he was banished to. And in 1815, he takes a thousand men back into Paris. And he overthrows King Louis the 13th, or is it the 18th? The 18th. Sorry, Louis the 18th. And he spends 100 days as the emperor again. And he's like, we're going to keep doing it. And so he tries to come. He's like, hey guys. Russia. So yeah, so he tries it again. And you know, it's, I mean, a little bit of success. Like he has the same sort of military success. He's still like clearly a good military strategist. But on June 22nd, 1815, they say, hey, you got to go. We'll take your son. He can be in charge. But you got to go. And so they exile him to Saint Helena, where he ends up living the rest of his life. On a little island town of Jamestown. What's this? Yeah, this is off the west coast of Africa. Yeah. And so he lives there the rest of his life. And he dies in March 1921 or 1821. 106 years later, along life. Yeah. And so what does that, dude? The evil people live really long. What's really interesting, though, is... Also, he wasn't that old, huh? Yeah, he would have been... 53? Yeah. 51. 51. His last words were France, the army, the head of the army, Josephine. France. The army, the head of the army. Jojo. And Josephine was his first wife. He's been remarried since then. You're on fire. You're on fire. You're on fire. You're on fire. France. Yeah, that would suck. Josephine was his first wife. And you're on your third wife. And you wake up and you're like, Josephine. And she's like, uh. Yes. Yeah. You're like, okay. He does that. France took his body. And 57 was pretty tall back then. And 51 was kind of old. So they took his body and they did it what? They've got this little mausoleum form in France. He's still in there. He's in there. Yeah. Which seems small. It does seem small. This is clearly the... Is this the side view? This is the side view, dude. It seems small. He's got to be bent in there. What's the other view? Give me a Pokemon go 360 of this thing. Hold on. What's the... There's no way. Okay, here we go. I got a... I got a diagonal view. Oh, I'm sure it's pretty deep, you know. He's probably... Yeah, give me that guy. I think he's sideways. He's got to be bent. There's no way he's in this enough. If he's in this straight, bro lied about his height. He is not 57. He's like 53. Maybe five. I mean, how big is this thing? I mean, it's pretty big. You can see a person up there on the second floor. Even on the first floor, there's a couple of people in there. Yeah, but I mean, it might be... You know, he might be like laying... There might be... You know, he's got to be fully laying in there, huh? We should go and see how big it is. And this is... And they did this for him. They were like, yeah, he's still cool, though. Oh, the French... It's kind of like a love-hate relationship, I think. Because... You did usher in a different... Yeah, he ushered in a different... Kind of like an enlightenment era for the French. He also... His law code is adopted at 120 countries. Yeah. His military strategy is used to this day. Like, he's widely revered as like a... Genius. Yeah, and when it comes to military strategy. But then there is kind of the conqueror emperor type of thing. That's pretty... Something's broken up there. Yeah, not great. Yeah. But he loved his mom. The French love their moms. The French love their moms. But what's interesting is after this, the... The whole of Europe came together and they put together a series of treaties. A whole series of treaties to stop a Napoleon from ever happening again. Okay. And Alexander, sorry, I was in the first. His big thing... He argued against having any sort of like democratically led... Or even... This new type of government because this is what it leads to. This is what it creates. So he made a big push to go back to more traditional values, traditional Russian values. But you see all of these treaties start to take shape. And these nations began to like agree to defend all of each other against any sort of uprising. Which included revolution. Yeah. So in throughout the 1800s, you would see these revolutions pop up all around... Not just Europe, but the whole greater Mediterranean. And these other nations would come in to stop the revolution. And so it wasn't just that government stopping the revolution. It was all their allies. Now we're coming in and stamping out revolutionary powers. Which created this kind of era of peace that... I don't want to say... It hit a fever bubble point. Right. The World War. And the first World War was this kind of artificial peace where there was a lot of tension. And there was definitely a lot of... There was a treaty made to carve up Africa for all these different nations. And so Africa greatly changed in the wake of this, trying to avoid another war like the Napoleonic War. But ultimately that little... This duct tape prevention of war led to... More. World War One. At that time the worst that anyone had ever seen. Yeah. And we didn't know. And we don't know. And we don't know. So pretty crazy how... I don't know. We said this in the last episode, but it's all connected. And you can kind of get the vibe that it's not. But when you start to see the three lines of how the oldest connects... I think a lot of times you hear World War One be painted as a pointless war that didn't need to happen. But seeing the origins of it. Yeah, a lot of it like it is this boiling that had been going on for like a century. Yeah. That I guess there wasn't like really any goals to that war by that point. But there was this tension that almost... I mean clearly had to get released between all these powers. And it greatly reshaped the world. Well, as my favorite song goes... My name is Napoleon Bonaparte. And it's time to fiddle off. Hey, thanks for listening to this episode of Things On The Last Night. Please share this with somebody. Tell somebody about the show. It's the freest and easiest way to help us grow this thing. If you liked that episode and you want another one we did an episode about Vladimir Putin. Yeah, that guy. And he's also 57. He's 57. And so you can go listen to that, watch that wherever you're getting this podcast. And also, if you want next week's episode to find out what the topic actually is, that Tim keeps teasing over here, you can find us on Patreon. That's another way to support the show. Zero pressure to do it, but we did make it as cheap as possible. So there's not really any excuse not to anymore. And if you don't, you're a bad friend. And right? So we'll see you next week if you're a bad friend. But we'll see you right now on Patreon if you're a good friend. So which one are you? Supportive? We're honest. Right Tim? Right.


Imagine waking up one random Tuesday morning, nudging your spouse awake, and whispering, “Hey. It’s time.” Time for what? To seize control of an entire country, obviously. That’s exactly what Napoleon Bonaparte did on November 9th, 1799 — and by 2 a.m. the next morning, through a series of carefully orchestrated meetings, he had legally couped his way into running … Read More

The War of 1812: America’s Most Pointless War?

09-29-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, man, what's up? Have you ever heard of the War of 1812? I'm so glad we're doing this because there are a couple of things I know about the War of 1812 and then it's that it was a war. Yeah. And that it happened. That's it, 1812, that's all I know. I know, no, I know, I know some stuff about it. And, but I'm gonna like, I'm gonna let you steer this one. What am I, yes, and it literally just means, yes, and hey, in regards to your new hairstyle, do you want me to be supportive or honest? That's a fun question, I'm just asking a lot more people, which I would be supportive or honest. Things I learned last night. As opposed to what we normally do. Yeah, it opposed to me, yeah, so let's learn about this. I do think that's funny. You mentioned in the year, we do one word, it's like we try to do an episode for memory that we did in the past, but I do think it's funny for me to bring it to the episode. And then I just try to do it, try it. Also a funny bit. We should try to do it. So at the end of the year, when you're listening in December, which is coming up, what is going to do some short episodes, let's just do that, where it's like 20 minutes. And we have to try to do a couple from memory, and also throw some topics at me and just see what I can, what I can just come up with. And then you live fact checked me as we're going, yeah, that's a good way, that's a good way. I like that. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. Also, I think like the most obscure person, so no chance, now I'm going to give you someone really well now, or in a vet that's really well known, like the War of 1812. Sure. Maybe we should say. I don't want people to know about 1812 or though, I think it's one of those things where it's like, it's kind of on the, it's this is hipsters know about the War of 1812. You know what? That's what it is. That's where it is. Football jocks. They know a lot about War War II. Yeah. So the mustache who hangs out at Kingdom Coffee in Springfield, Missouri knows a lot about the War of 1812. You know, it's kind of weird that you say that, but that's actually so accurate. Yeah. It's actually like painfully. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, everyone's fascinating with FDR, but I like, I can't name a single person. Let's rip it. Okay. So the War of 1812 happens about 1812, but there's, there's a build up. Yeah. Set in the scene, kind of going back roughly to about 1804. And there's really kind of like two sides of the war. There's obviously, there's the American side, there's really two sides. There's the American side of the war. And the American side of the war is kind of like, I think I said this last time I brought this up, but it's like the second war for independence. Right. The United States won its war for independence, and it had it technically speaking. But Great Britain still was kind of ruling over us. Like it was like, it was like, yeah, it's been about 30 years at this point since the revolutionary. Yeah. Yeah. And so, and with that, like the Great Britain recognized the United States as its own nation. Yeah. Yeah, you're a country, but like we're in charge, okay? And so like there was still like a lot of regressive policies against the United States. And so for example, during this period, the Napoleonic wars are going off on Napoleon is going crazy. It was about Napoleon. That's a good idea. And so, Napoleon is going crazy all across Europe. And as a part of that, going crazy, Napoleon's going, you know, you guys know, that's how we described it. The Napoleon's going ham on Europe, right? Right. And then you know, Britain's looking at this, oh, the rinky dinky United States, huh? Oh, they talk like this. They didn't. They didn't. But that's, but that's actually, that's how they started it. They gave us big accents as a way of making fun of us. Yeah. And the US was like, you know what? Pretty sick. We're just going to take it. It's pretty sick. No, the war was such a big deal. And there was so many British soldiers that were stuck on British naval brigades traveling throughout Europe and war. Right. And the experience was so bad on these ships. Yeah. They were, they had like terrible discipline. And by terrible discipline, I mean, like they would like beat each other, beat their soldiers when they didn't like comply. Right. Food was really bad. A lot of them were starving. There was disease. Was rampant. It was dirty. And so what started happening in the middle of the Napoleonic Wars, a lot of these British naval sailors started realizing, oh, I can stay on this British ship and I can risk my life in a million different ways, right or the American trade ships keep coming. And their ships are newer and they're nicer and they're cleaner and they pay well. And I don't have the risk of getting shot. And so a bunch of British sailors were deserting the war effort and becoming American sailors like trade sailors. And a lot of them were nationalizing and becoming American citizens in the process. The problem was it was hard to tell these people apart, like who was the British person on board the ship and who was the American person on board the ship. Because like you mentioned, the United States has only been its own free nation for a little over 30 years at this point. And most of them came from Great Britain to begin with. And so they all sound like British people still. And so what Britain did was they said, we need our soldiers back. And so they enacted a policy. And the United States is looking around like, we don't have any, we don't have any. I don't know what you're talking about. You can find them. And so they, so Great Britain enacted what they called impressment. And basically what they would do is they would roll up to, yeah, I tried to do that when I was in middle school and high school, man, I was, I was going, I was bouncing around front group to front group, just impressment, you know, are you impressment? Hey, it's like a juggle. It would be more impressive if there were things, no, I'm juggling. Did you see that guy just showed up in like air juggled at the talent show? Yeah. I'm an air judge. You know what? What's the weirdest thing that someone did at the talent show? My talent show. Yeah. Um, I don't know if I would even cause weird because like, it got mixed responses. Uh-huh. I thought it was sick. But there was a kid who did the, through the fire and the flames on expert on guitar hero. And like he, he got, he had a wireless guitar and like, they had the lights go down. And there was a TV at the end on the stage. And he like came down the aisle and was like going down the aisle doing it. And he was wearing a wig. It was so sick. Um, but it got mixed, like some people thought it was weird that he did that. And so that was like it got mixed responses from the student population. That would be cool. Now. Yeah. Also the teacher who sponsored that, the teacher, never mind. I don't want to. No, like he thought he, he really made a big deal about him playing guitar here all the time. And constantly he kept the place teacher play guitar hero. No. The student who did it was really good at it. And the student who did it wasn't like the most popular kid in school. And there was times where it was like, are you making fun of this guy? Like it kind of sometimes was making fun of them. Yeah. The teacher was trying to do impressment on the class, kind of, kind of, kind of what of the kids. Yeah. That does suck. That for sure existed where teachers were like making fun of some of those students. But it was on the line. It's like genuinely. I'm not sure. Like there was moments where it's like, I can make a farmer. Do you actually like this? Like I can't tell. Yeah. I don't know. You wouldn't be able to tell. Would you? You seem like the type who couldn't tell a difference. Yeah. These are my friends. They're all nuts. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What was the weirdest thing in your touch? Was it you? No. There was a kid who tried to do ventriloquism. Ooh. Yeah. Love that. When I say tried to, you get, I mean, his mouth was open the whole time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You just know how to do a lot of like peculiar things. You've adopted a lot of strange skills that I don't know anybody else who has. Is that genuinely where that came from? I do have a set of skills. Like like you're like what? And I'm trying to blanket what that's called, but what's this? The accordion? You're really good at it. This. How does that happen? Like how do you happen? Well, I mean, you pull up and push it. You know, it's pretty self-explanatory. How? No, but like I bet you bought an accordion in a fish shop. I bet you would call it, we were 19 and you were sitting there and you were good at the accordion. In 2013, what was good at the accordion in 2013? And I thought like, I was like, why? Why are Reagan and Stevie not impressed by this? There were two girls on our side class that me and Tim were trying to impress me and impress me. Why are they not impressed by this? I can put the accordion. Look, I can put the accordion there like, okay. Tim can't tell if that's a joke. They were like making fun of me to you and they were like, yeah, he's really cool. Yeah, he's really cool. Yeah, he's really cool. And you're like, yeah, he's like my best friend. Yeah, right, genuinely. And then they walk away and they're like, so they're both idiots. So they're both like really dumb, huh? I was good at the accordion. It's true. Yeah. That wasn't the only thing. I feel like I went to your house for the first time and just saw your stuff and I was like, why does he know how to do all this? It was like so random. It was all, it was all trying to, I thought, I thought, genuinely, I thought that learning to play the tuba was going to impress some girls. Yeah. Did it? No, not in the slightest. Just my mom. I know. I don't know why. Honestly, I thought it was cool. Like the sussophone marching in the band with the big, you know, I was like, oh, those are the coolest ones. It is cool. It is cool. It does give like a doctor suss vibe, which is what I was going for. I was like, you know what girls in college, they're going to like my doctor suss vibes. Yeah, why did you know Tim? I don't think you meant to do this, but it is one of those things where it's like, why was I good at all those things? And it's just because I had a lot of time to do them to do things. And you were hanging out with people and friends. No, I was getting good at Halo 3. And I just, I threw myself out of Halo 3. It adds. It's really. It was. It was. Yeah. So anyway, they did a thing called impressment when they're trying to get the British shoulders. No, yeah. So what they would do is they pull up to these and they would do a talent show. And they're like, we know you want to be one of us hide the scurvy. Let's get these boys doing the voice. That's actually what the original Mount Rushmore was. A lot of people don't know that. Yeah, the heads turn around. Yeah. Um, so have you heard, never mind, um, have you heard of what the like plan for our Rushmore originally was? What? You heard like, because Mount Rushmore was supposed to be like not just the heads. They were into the full bodies. They were going to do the full bodies. And also, they were into the full bodies. No way. It might have been like, just like, yeah, they were in the chest. I don't know. Yeah. But there is down in the middle chest. There is, I don't know which one, but in one of them, there's a big cavity in the back of their head. There's a room because it was going to be a fault. I know which one. And so, but they never finished the vault. And so, like, there's a big doorway you can get in and it's supposed to, is that in the car too? I mean, I'm sure it's in car too. Which one has a, which one has a, I mean, I think it's Lincoln, right? Uh. I thought I didn't, no, is that it is actually Lincoln, no, wait, is it really, yeah, it's a 70 foot unfinished tunnel that was supposed to go to the Hall of Records. There's a secret tunnel in Mount Rochmore. Yeah. In the back of Abraham Lincoln's head, there's a 70 foot long tunnel. That was originally carved to lead to a titanium vault that they were going to call the Hall of Records. And they were going to keep like our secrets there. I don't know. I don't know what the plan was for it. It's like a library. How did you know about this? I did not know about this at all. Well, actually, maybe that's the weird stuff I was doing in high school is learning weird things like this. I literally did not know that that was there. Yeah. You're not allowed to go there. Oh. How did you get there? Uh. What does the back of Mount Rochmore look like? Uh. Let me get a picture. Have you seen the, has anyone seen the back of Mount Rochmore? Yeah. Gosh. It's so stupid. There's some dumb stuff in here. Um. What is that? Oh, yeah. They're butts. That makes sense. Oh, it's behind Lincoln's head. Okay. So it's not in Lincoln's head. Yeah. So yeah, it's behind. Oh. There's like fully a gigantic hole back there. Yeah. Because that was going to be the hall of records. The idea was, I guess a hard place to get to and it was going to be a titanium vault. And I don't know what you kept there. Like the history, like I genuinely don't know what the intention was, but it never was finished. Huh. So. Yeah. Because they did part of George Washington's torso. Yeah. I think it was supposed to be like the whole glass seat. You can see the shoulder. Yeah. It's supposed to exist there. And they just never did it. What's the progress on that other one, the, um, the one next to it? You know, I'm talking about the one that's like, yeah, I know what you're talking about. Crazy horse. Yeah. Yeah. That's because what's the, what's their current projected finish date of that? Let's see. Yeah. They just drilled this. I have never seen that before. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, there's no official completion date for crazy horse. Right now, last thing they did is dedicated the left hand in 2024, uh, for crazy horse. But I know what they were planning to do is they were planning on storing our founding documents in there was the intention. They were going to put like the declaration independence and yeah, and so it'd be encased in a titanium casing and stone. So I guess it'd be like super safe. I don't know. But yeah, here's crazy horse. Yeah. This one's going to take a long time. Yeah. I think I think a big thing is just like funding. Yeah. Yeah. This is just like crowd funded essentially. Yeah. Wild. Huh? Interesting. Well, I don't know how we got here. I remember what they were doing a talent show. Hey, we just reduced the price of our Patreon to $6.99 a month. That's one price for everybody. You get all the perks. You get the live hangouts. You get to join the discord. You get early access. Whichever reason you're joining for, we wanted to make it one price because I hate that everything in the world is going up in price. And so we wanted to make this a little bit more affordable for everyone to do. And so, uh, but also, you know, the other goal is that more of you join it so that we can keep funding the show. I mean, like, what, you know, how do I say that? That sounds like we're poor. And we are. We are. And, uh, no. But if you can't join us on Patreon, no worries at all. Uh, another way to support the show is by sharing it. Please tell somebody you like the show. And thanks for for being here for this episode. Oh, we said, we said about Rush World was the voice and so they had to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. Impressive. Impressive it was they would pull up to the ship and they would like lower boards and crossover and board the ship. Yes. And they would be like all the British are coming with us. And but what really happened was they were like, all of you, they were like, we don't know which ones are British. So they would just pick a bunch. They'd be like, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, yeah, you're, you're Navy soldiers. Hey, Alex, which of us do you think we get picked? I don't make that face what I'm doing this, yeah, they, they board and I've said they're like this. I feel like I want to go, I feel like Tim needing to do that kind of is the tell now they, but they would they would just come in and they would just like you, you, you, you, you, you're Navy soldiers now, uh, and they would for the British, yeah, for the British and they would just take, take them across and that was there we go. All right. Well, it was kind of like they pointed muskets out of them. We're like, get on the boat. Uh, and so you didn't really have a choice. Yeah, that was the 1800s in a nutshell. Wasn't it? Yeah. And so this was obviously something that I do think that a lot of like people just don't even understand how crazy civilization is now compared to like 200 years ago. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like a hundred year, uh, more than a hundred years ago now, but I mean, like, I don't know, not that like, you used to just buy force everything. Yes. So much of human history, yep, until the last 180, 190 years, I mean, I think even less than that. I think World War II, I think I think the economic world that was created in the post World War II is what led to the actual civilized society. Yeah. Huh. Yeah. Um, but, uh, so the United States obviously dated this. Yeah. This was not something that was good for the US. Another thing that they did was the British enacted the orders and council, which was part of trying to just make sure that they had the funding necessary to defeat Napoleon. Right. And so they were just regularly, uh, it kind of like attacks, but more like just a seizure, they would go to these American ships and they would just take everything, yeah, all the product, uh, everything that they all the supplies. And the often just the whole ship, they would just back it, we need it for the war. This is ours now. Um, yeah. And so the US is like, hey, we're like our own thing, um, just a, we're actually a different country and they're like, shut up. Just burst the boat. Come on. Just give us the boat, man. Come on. Come on. They're grand theft autoing the ocean. Exactly. Yeah. And so, so they are, uh, uh, uh, really pushing their fists down on the United States in a lot of ways. Another thing that's happening, um, on the other side of the United States, uh, this is pretty Louisiana purchase, very almost Louisiana purchase. But so there's this very, almost Louisiana purchase. What year was Louisiana purchase, uh, it was the middle of this. So I want to say like 18 11, 204, isn't I don't know, uh, dang it, 1803, 1803. So I knew that. So in the lead up, there is this chunk of the Midwest that has a bunch of native population right. And the United States is beginning its westward expansion, right. And this obviously is something that the native populations were like, hold on. And so there was these two native leaders, the native populations, like, hey, we're kind of our own thing. And the US is like, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, like crazy. What's going on of it? The Brits are doing that to them and they turn around and they're like, hey, just shut it. It's very middle brother behavior. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. So to come, so, uh, and his brother, uh, 10th, 10th squad, uh, 10th squad, uh, you don't have to try to say their names, but I appreciate your effort. Thanks. Uh, they get together and they say, there is no chance we're going to be able to stop this by ourselves. And so they put together, uh, what is called the Pan Indian Confederacy. And so they went through to basically every tribe from the Great Lakes to the South. And they were like, we need to work together to feed the United States. Uh, they're going to take all of our land if we don't. And what they said is they said, and what was really interesting is there was a pretty big, uh, discrepancy among the different tribal nations in terms of how they felt about this. Like, yeah, we'll be a part of it. Like, we'll be Americans and like, we'll naturalize and be U.S. Oh, sure. And then there was others that were like, we're going to kill anybody who looks at us. Yeah. And so there was a pretty wide gap between, but they went through and they made this argument that they were like, Hey, this land is not anybody's land. This is the earth. And like, they don't have a right to come take it from anybody and make get theirs. Like, this is just where we live. And so they made this like, like traditional native argument and got a huge chunk of their population to work together and basically, basically create like a NATO, like a Native American NATO to define themselves against the United States. And so this ended up leading to a series of battles where the United States was pushing across the Midwest. At the same time that Napoleon's pushing across Europe, yes, they're doing this. And then also getting their resources pulled on the other side. Yeah, from Great Britain to support the. Just trying to help you create a timeline here. Yeah. And so this is getting, this is starting to kind of boil over on both sides. Yes. And it boils into a moment in 1811 with a battle of typical new, where there was, it was basically, you started to see a moment where it became clear that Great Britain was not only doing impressment and doing the orders and orders and council, but they also were like potentially funding, but definitely aggravating the Pan Indian. Oh. And they were like, yeah, you do your thing. And so the battle they were trying to squeeze us. Yeah, yeah. And so the battle of the typical new, like Britain, it became clear that they were pulling the strings in that. And after that, Madison asked Congress for a Declaration of War. That's what would be the first Declaration of War in the history of the United States. And this and the last. I think we've done it six times. I want to say, but I mean, there's been a lot more, there's been like, that's an I was an operation. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's not a war, okay. And so they, they go to make this Declaration of War and eventually, like, it took a lot of convincing. There was a whole group of people that got the name, the War Hawks and a lot of people in the North were very against it because especially in cities like Boston, their entire economy was trade with Great Britain. And so going to one with Great Britain was like, hey, like, what are we going to do? Like, we need this. We can't just bite the hand that feeds us. And so there was a pretty big pushback against it. So there was, let me see what this was called, the Chesapeake Leopard Affair. And this was now 1807. This was a situation where you had a HMS leopard, which was a British ship that was docking on the Chesapeake, the US Chesapeake, and they were looking to do like an impressment sort of situation. And instead of just pulling up and doing what they normally do, or they pull up alongside it, they board, they take the people, they just pulled up alongside it, and they just started shooting cannons at it. And they killed three American sailors, drug off four, and this was kind of that moment that kind of galvanized. Yeah, it was like being like, oh, you're attacked us. Oh, this is like, yeah, you're like trying to do war here. Yeah. And meanwhile, Great Britain, oh, you're trying to do war. Meanwhile, Great Britain doesn't care about anything that's going on here. I should say doesn't care. It is the bottom priority because they are, again, they're fighting the pollution. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're also, remember, fighting the Luddites, and they care a lot about the Luddites. They sent a large army to fight back the Luddites. And so they're spread pretty thin. But they are trying to almost like puppeteer war over here through the Pananyan Council. And so this finally became a thing where Great Britain was like, okay, we've got to send some people over there. So they end up sending, I believe it was 11, 12% of their military over, so a small portion to basically do a naval blockade. And so they began being these battles at sea. And it's interesting to kind of look at this phase of the war because up until Napoleon was exiled, yeah, there was some naval conflicts, some small skirmishes. But mostly this was the US versus the Pananyan Council. Right. There was one moment where the US was like, hey, maybe we could take Canada because Britain isn't looking and that's a British colony. So they tried that and it went horribly wrong and they did the whole thing. They tried to negotiate with Canada. Canada's like, we're good, man, actually, we kind of like Britain, we kind of love them. And so it kind of fell apart pretty quickly. But then when Napoleon gets exiled, all of a sudden, Great Britain's like, all right, we got the time now. And so they were into Washington and they just burned down everything. Yes. And so this is where they burned down the White House, a lot of the important national monuments that we had in that era. And they were like, hey, don't forget who you're talking to here. It was kind of like the intent. But a handful of others don't forget who you're talking to. What's some respect? So what's interesting though is throughout this, the United States is very like a split in terms of how they feel about it. The North, honestly, a large swath of New England is considering breaking off and becoming their own nation as a part of this war. Because they're like, you're suffocating our economy by fighting Great Britain right now. Sure. Koreans are being the secret meeting in Hartford, Hartford, where they kind of put together this idea, this was called the Hartford Resolutions. And this idea, it's really interesting, it doesn't actually go through, but it does seem to be a, what's the word I'm looking for, like plant the seeds for some future developments in the States. So the three big things that they argued for and this was eliminating the three fifths compromise, which was very early to the game in that. But their reasoning wasn't really the right reasoning, I should say, because the argument that they were making was the only reason we lost the vote to go to war is because they have more representation because of the three fifths compromise. And so they were like, they should have zero, like, oh, it wasn't like, let's, let's make a full citizens. It was like, let's make a non-citizens. Yeah. So that way they don't have a disproportionate. So that was not ahead. It was not. It was not. That was not. That was not like, oh, pretty ahead of the, pretty ahead of the curve there. That means no. It's fully wrong. The inside of the curve. The ends were good. The means were not great. The ends were not good. Oh, I guess you're right. I guess you're right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. You're right, you're right. The ends were not good. I guess you're right. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like the end goal. You're right, you're right, you're right. No. I'm getting mixed up. Eventually, making a full citizen. Yeah. You're right, you're right. Yeah. I know. Okay. So the second thing they did was they wanted, all right, I guess. Yeah. Go ahead and try to get off that one for sure. It was requiring a two-thirds majority for declaring war. They were like, this has to be a super majority for this. Yeah. You cannot have, like, because they, I guess you can't have a 51-49. Yeah. They were very against this. And then the thing that they argued for that was really interesting is they wanted to limit presidents to a single term. And they wanted to prevent there being a consecutive president from the same state. So if you were running and last person who ran was from the same state as you, you can't run that term. Oh. Which is really interesting. And I've been thinking about this since I read this. And I can't decide if I think this is a good idea or a bad idea yet. The state thing, I think, is inconsequential. I don't think that that really matters. But are you saying one term? It's a single term. Yeah. Like, I can't decide if I think that's a good idea or a bad idea. I think two terms is fine. I think what we've got is already short enough. The bigger problem is that four years is not enough time to do— Anything. Hardly anything, right? Yeah. Yeah. Especially when, every two years, you're losing the house and Senate. Yeah. You know? Yeah, exactly. And with how polarized our current system is, like, you really have two years to do something. There is a kind of ridiculous amount of instability in having power change in hand. That's what I'm saying. So off. Yes. Yes. And it's hard to do anything geopolitically. And especially since some administrations would like to politicize a ton of offices, because we used to have a lot more federal employees who were there through different administrations. Yeah. And now, because they won't control the whole thing, they're trying to make it so the new administration puts this person, this person, this person, this person, this person, this person, this person, and this person in. Yep. Yep. And so it's like every four or five, every four to eight years, we're replacing the entire thing. Yep. That doesn't make sense. Yep. Yep. Yep. It barely works whenever you're replacing this sector and then these federal employees who can stay here for 20 years, you know, and are supposed to be completely independent. Yep. Anyway. Get back to the war between 12. Let's go back to the past. They're going to cause Jeyer and to crash out. So they come up with all of this and they say, okay, let's go to Washington. Let's bring this to them. And they show up in the like oh my gosh, it's on fire. Well, here's the thing. Oh, we're too late. Here's the interesting thing is everybody knows that this war is not going well for the United States. They are. Everybody knows it. Well, the whole of the United States does. Yes, it was getting around because here's the thing before the, before the British ever really got involved in the war, like we were fighting the war and the British just like stop where we're busy. Oh my gosh, they're still doing this. And so before the British ever really stepped foot in like actually being a part of the war, we were deeply in a bad place because we are a young country at the time. Sure. We don't have a strong military. Right. We have been actively taking our ships, actively taking our soldiers and taking our resources. And we are also fighting this war on the other front where we're trying to expand where we're trying to expand and it's not going great either. Like it's going, it's kind of like a tip for tats sort of situation on that side of the front on that front. And so it's getting the point where it's genuinely starting to look like, especially once Britain gets into the war. Yeah. And we started burning resources. We're about to be stalked out. Maybe the burning of DC and the amount of the way our funds are dropping and the way our economy is thinking because the great Britain was our number one trade partner. Right. It's genuinely in a situation in 1814 where it looks like the United States might not survive this. Yeah. And so that's where the Hartford Commission gets together and they come up with this policy. They say, okay, let's march on Washington. And let's try to create some change, get a treaty in place and in this war once and for all. Or we're in New England. Like we're a different nation. Yeah. And so they start marching on on Washington meanwhile, while this is happening, Washington puts together the treaty again. And so December 24th, 1814 is when the treaty again is signed. Guys, it's Christmas. What's going on? It's a little bit. Have a heart. Well, you guys are being real screwages right now. And what's really interesting is this treaty is basically like, let's pretend that there's a wrap. Hey, I don't, I just woke up. I don't remember anything from the last two years, do you? What if we didn't? It's genuinely, let's just restore everything back to the way it was. All the pre-war borders are going to be what they were before. You guys can keep doing an imprisonment. That's cool. All of the origins and counsel, like if you guys want to do that, whatever, like all the maritime rights, all this stuff that we went to war for, it's okay. We forget it. I'm sorry. Yeah. But now, Britain's like, no, no, they are also like, yeah, that sounds fine. We're tired. Oh, we just did the Napoleon, we just did Napoleon and we did the Luddites. Now we're doing this and it's just like we're just so sick of it. So they all agree to go back to the status quo, but here's the problem about going to war in this time is news travels slowly. And so on January 8th, 1855, general, sorry, 1815, January 1855, real slow. So on January 8th, 2006, just ran out of that, the treaty, well, did you hear the more 1812 is over? I've been here for a hundred years. Hey, October 22nd, we're doing till alive as part of the Fountain City Comedy Festival here in Kansas City. You got a tillin.com slash live for more information. You get passes. There's going to be more than just us. Oh, yeah. It's like legitimately not an advertisement right now. The festival's pretty sick. Like, there's a really great lineup. A lot of really good comics. This thing's been growing a lot the past couple of years, so really cool to be the part of it. And so hopefully we'll see you there. Andrew Jackson is fighting the Battle of New Orleans. Uh-huh. The Battle of New Orleans is crazy because this was because it's beets everywhere and it was, you know, whoa, yeah, which doctors, oh, no, the crazy thing about the battle, oh, no, sorry, your bit went to a place I don't want to go. So I'm going to break the cardinal rule and say, no, no, okay. Which doctors and like the swamps? Yeah, yeah, I guess I get it. I don't think they were there yet, though. I think the title is, I'm pretty sure they're there. Win, did, win. Which doctors, always, yeah, said, uh, oh, yeah, they were there. Yeah. Huh? They call them root doctors, though, at the time. Yeah, but they did. So, huh. I'm sorry. Oh, sorry. We'll go back to it. Yes. What am I, yes, and it's literally just me saying, yes, and hey, in regards to your new hairstyle, do you want me to be supportive or honest? That's a fun question. I started asking a lot more people, which I would be supportive or honest. That is pretty funny. Yes. And it's very clear. What do you think? Yeah. What do you need from me right now? That's pretty honest. I'll be honest. Support or honesty? Because I can lie. Jeez. Um, it looks good. I think so. Uh, which one do you think that was? I want to let you guess which one I chose there. I'm just mad that you went, oh, no. And then I was right. Yeah. That's a no way. I'm sorry. There was, that does make me think they'll speak it up like things you're asking. Other people, uh, this is a new thing I'm asking people. When's the last time you woke up in the middle of the night and you thought there was a demon in the room with you? You asked for that yesterday and pandas for us. Why? Why are you asking people? I think it's a flybreaker. All right, guys. Hey, thanks for going to our team building. Uh, we're going to have a really great exercise as we begin. Uh, we got some questions on the PowerPoint behind me. So we're going to break into groups and, uh, you know, uh, go eat, answer the question and then like when, when the, when the bell rings, switch groups and yeah, keep going. So, uh, first question is, what was your favorite summer memory? Okay. Two minutes on the clock, guys. All right. Okay, guys. That was great. That was great. Break up with switch groups and stuff. Okay. Next question. When was the last time you saw a demon in your room? All right. Talk amongst yourselves. We do have bagels and coffee in the back. Yeah. And which doctors were there? In the early 1800s. In the early 1800s. So like, it could have been a witch doctor. We were called root doctors. Yeah. Ironically, actually, I asked Bri this the other day and she was like, well, for me, when I was a kid, it was, it was witches. I thought witches were in the room all the time. That was my thing. Yeah. Yeah. Did you think it was demons or ghosts? No, I thought it was my dad. My dad's the room. I was like, dad. And then I would wake up. Your eyes were closed there. And you're like gripping the blankets. Dad is like, dad. Dad. Dad. Dad. You know, oh, uh, this is a genuine question. I wanted to know your answer though. When was the last time in college, I think, I think I woke up in an angel once. How interesting. Actually, do you think you told me that story? Yeah. Yeah. I don't think it's happened in me since high school. Yeah. Well, we did a whole episode on this man. Yeah. Yeah. And that was kind of like the, but we talked about. Yeah, that's an, or the hat man, honestly, like the hat man is probably the closest thing to like what I was envisioning whenever, you know, it wasn't because of Benadryl. It was because of deep regrets that I held in my heart, so I saw the hat man because I'm filled with regret, so he's playing the accordion. He taught me. I learned he's like, you want to know how to do this? You asked me earlier, I was stressed, I was too embarrassed to admit this. You asked me earlier how I know all this stuff, and it's just going to spend a lot of time with the hat man. I haven't done me a lot of really straight skills. A hat man taught me how to do this. You want to see how to start a fire with your hands? I like that we both did what we think would start a fire with our hands. And I want to emphasize that you and I did that in front of an eagle scout. And we're right though, aren't we? I mean, there's got to be something on my hand. Yeah, there's got to be just doing this. Yeah, like just your hands not going to start on fire. Oh, you want to bet? Oh, I bet if I did this all enough. Just keep going through the episode like this. Yeah, I think you probably, Tim, tell about the 1812 war, we're now in 1815, you messed it up. That's how we got here. So the Battle of New Orleans, Andrew Jackson, January, 1815, in New Orleans, Louisiana. What's really interesting is this battle, United States had about 4,000 men. The British forces had about 8,400. And what's crazy is that Andrew Jackson somehow ended up, this was a very short battle. It was about 40 minutes. And in those 40 minutes, the United States, the numbers are a little tough to get exact, but some are between 13 and 71 killed about 39 wounded. The British forces had over 2,000 killed and around 300 wounded. And they captured almost 500. And so this was like a huge victory. And this whole, this created, turned Andrew Jackson into like a folk hero, which is what catapulted it later into the presidency. But this was after the war, like after the treaty. And so this was I think a relatively normal like, he did it and he was like, we did it. And they were like, oh, yes, you did it, you did it. You did it. You did it. You did it. You did it. You did it. You did it. You did it on this. Great, great, great. Andrew Jackson did this. Put it in the papers. Did newspapers exist yet? Did we have the printing press? We had the printing press, but I don't think Tim, I'm joking with you, Kyle. I don't know if we had like newspapers, though, I don't know. But news does reach out to what's really interesting. So the tree of Ghent has been signed for a month. Bore is over as far as Washington's concerned. Yeah. Then on this same day, February 13th in the morning, Andrew Jackson gets back to Washington and tells the stories of their big successes in New Orleans. And they're like, oh, and they're like, that's awesome, dude. Yes. And he's like, yeah, it was January 8th, and they're like, yeah, woo, woo, woo, woo, we're going to have to explain this one. So when you say January 8th, that is central time, right? It was the other time zone. It was before we started. Oh, yeah, it was, woo, woo. And so, so later that evening, though, the Hartford Commission shows up and they're like, hey, we figured out how would I do this and they're like, guys, they're like, whoa, I'm 100 of them. Stand right there. It's like, yeah, they're all captive, I don't like them. I don't like them. No, and so, so Washington is still on fire, but everybody's ecstatic. Everyone's like, we got a treaty. We kicked their butts in Louisiana. And so the Hartford Commission is like, oh, no, what was your idea? We were actually thinking about declaring war. We were actually kind of thinking like, like, imagine a piano that was like on a bag, and you could just cut a bag, you know, um, we, we came up with three ideas, a bag piano. Um, let's, let's put four of these guys on Mount Rushmore. So they're on February 16th, Congress or the Senate ratifies the treaty of Gantt, and then the following day, they officially proclaimed the peace, the war is over, um, everything can go back to the way it is, or the way it was, um, kind of, uh, because a lot of think, like, like that's the thing about this is like technically they restored the status quo. But also, yeah. And while technically the US and, it's been like, you know, if you've been punched by one of your friends before, and then you guys hang out again, it's like, yeah, you punched me. I mean, yeah, we're cool, but also like, but like, I'm not going to forget that you punched me at one time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And, but there was more than the war with Britain in this. There was, they were stored pre-war borders between the United States and Britain were restored. Right. But there was still everything that was happening on the, with the Pan Indian, uh, borders. And so there was the, the native population were really like, you can't really say the United States or Britain won the war of 1812. It was kind of a draw. But you can say that the Native American nations lost the war, uh, because this is where, uh, much of the Midwest, uh, up through really the point where the Louisiana Purchase began was taken by the United States. Right. And then obviously the Louisiana Purchase. Oh, you know why I knew it was 1804. Why? That's the Lewis and Clark expedition. Oh, interesting. That's really interesting. Not that. And it's kind of interesting. We did a musical in fourth grade. Lewis and Clark, Clark and Lewis, Clark really wanted to be first, you know, is that historical or is that just part of the musical? That was part of the musical. I think it was for comedic effect. Oh, interesting. But it is interesting. And I didn't think, I haven't thought about that. It's interesting kind of an preparation of this, thinking about the Luddites and Napoleon. And even like right, like right before Napoleon was the French Revolution. And so it's like, it's crazy to think about like how all of this stuff, I don't know, you learn about a history class. And it seems like it's happening at a vacuum. Yes. Like it's all very separate. When you see it all, like it also like human history, again, I keep saying, like it's crazy that less than 200 years ago, they were, it was, you could just, whoever had the stronger power won that interaction. Yes. You know. Did you have those you want to say? No, I just think that like that's like, and that's, in a way, that's what laws are is that laws put power on your side so that when you have an interaction with someone, like a company can't rip me off. And if a company rips me off, I'm not going to go shoot them. Yes. But I do have power and then I can alert authorities. Yes. And I have rights. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. That's, those are powerful things. Yeah. I do think it's interesting. I'm pulling in a map so we can kind of see exactly what was seated by the Native American people as a result of this. And so you can kind of see, oh wow. Yeah. And I do think it also, it kind of set a precedence like before the war of 1812, there was a little bit that that was seated. But afterwards, it really accelerated this American westward expansion, after the war of 1812. And so I think like, yeah, there's, I think there's something to the fact that the United States realized, oh, even when all of them banded together, we were able to, and while we were also fighting Great Britain, we were able to take a lot of. Sure. I'd be interested more in that. We should do, I should, well, I would like to like find a book on that. Huh. Yeah. So that's the war of 1812. Yeah. Some people call it the second American revolution, but it was kind of a draw. It was kind of a draw. So like, I don't know how accurate that is, but it did, I will say, it did kind of cement that. We're our own thing. We're our own thing. It was like, yeah, whatever. I think I'm okay. Yeah. We're not going to. It's not worth the manpower to get overseas. Yeah. Yes. And try and fight you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy. And yeah, I ratified like a national fervor. Yeah. Now this was, do we have a national anthem then? Yes. I'm glad you brought this up. I almost forgot. And so this was in the middle of the war. There was a bombardment of Baltimore's Fort McHenry. It was, they, for 25 hours, they were bombing Fort McHenry. And there was one lawyer, Francis Scott Key, who was detained on a British ship. And he just. During 1812? During the war of 1812. Oh, wow. I was trying to get to a thing in the interior. No. Yeah. I'm glad you brought this up. But that's. This is a real thing I wanted to cover. Fun fact. Because yeah, that's where he watched Baltimore just get obliterated, like non-stop, 25 hours of bombardment. The rocket's red glare. And yeah. He wrote the national anthem. What would become? At the time he wasn't like writing the national anthem. Yeah. He wasn't like this. He was the national anthem. He was, he was more journaling, honestly, like poetically journaling because it was like an emotional thing to watch. And that it ended up getting set to a tune later in becoming the national anthem. Wow. Yeah. I was trying to get to a fiddle. But that's funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Funny. Interesting. Wow. Okay. Well, hey, if you like this episode and you want more of our show, we mentioned the Hat Man in this episode. And we did an episode about that in, you know, a lot of people have this shared sleep paralysis demon. And we talk about maybe why and maybe the source of the Hat Man. So it's so insane that this episode is the more of 1812 in the related episode is the Hat Man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also you can check us out on Patreon. That's a way to help support the show and help us grow. Please share this with somebody. Tell somebody about the show. Tell them. Tell them. Please. It really is the freest and most helpful way to help grow the show. So we'll see you next week.


Imagine you’re a sailor. It’s the early 1800s, and you’re standing on the deck of your ship when suddenly another vessel pulls up alongside you. Armed men board. They line everyone up, point their fingers — “you, you, you, and you” — and just like that, you’re conscripted into a foreign navy. No trial. No paperwork. Just muskets pointed at … Read More

The Man Who Bought a Company With Its Own Money | Trustor

09-22-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, man. What's up? Have you ever heard of Truster? Truster? Truster. Truster. Here I got a logo for you. Truster. Oh, okay. No, I've not heard of this, but this looks like it's going to be the 80s. Yeah, here's something interesting, like this era of logos for companies. This looks like new balance. Yeah. Yeah, like I remember in the 90s, early 2000s, seeing logos like this thing and they were so bad that I'm not gonna lie now. I think they're so sick. It's so tough. They're so sick. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It comes back around. Yeah. It does come back around. It's the font. Once everyone's doing it, it's bad. It is true. Yeah. I can't wait till 20 years from now. Everyone's like, actually, this AI slop is pretty cool. How do I make this look like 2026 AI slop? That's like the stalker with Truster. So retro is to have a is have that one font with the little. Yeah. Yeah. I know. We're talking about. Yeah. So retro to have all the characters in your image to have like 30 fingers. Yeah. No, they solved that now. That'd be like 2023. You know. Yeah. It's just like nightmare AI slop becomes nostalgic and like hamster. Yeah. So retro to have just the brightest colors possible. I had a day chicken in my kitchen. And I said I'm gonna take the French Roopie. I'm gonna have them Parmesan this chicken to helicopter blow off my Parmesan chicken. Yeah. Left. Other left. Things I learned last night. So anyway, what's up? So this company, well, this is a investment firm. Okay. And in the mid 90s, they were owned by this guy. 90s. Yes. Yes. His name is he's got he's got a tough name. Per O love Norberg. Per O love. Per dash O love. I think that's his first name. P E R dash O L O V. Per O love. Well, no, it's dashed. It's hyphenated. So it's Per O love. Per O love. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Norway. Okay. He probably goes by Mr. Norberg. Sure. He held 52% majority of the company. Trust or he was the owner of the company. Okay. And he sold to a group of investors. I'll give you all honestly. I'll just give you the full the full group here real quick. So it is this group of guys. So from left to right. Yeah. Okay. Sorry. I'm laughing because guy in the middle looks like he just went through a automated car wash with no car. Looks so disheveled. Yeah. So this is a group of guy from left to right. Is that him? I love his suit though. Yeah. Yeah. Very cool. From left to right, this is a guy by the name of Lindsey Smallbone. Yeah. Lord Moine is in the middle. Lord Moine. Yeah. That's his name. Okay. And then Peter Matson. Yeah. And not pictured in this photo is another guy by the name of Thomas Yessander. Okay. This is a the most quintessential 90s jacket look all cool across. Yeah. Yeah. And I'll kind of set the stories like does look like in the way this lighting is. He looks at the bad guy in an Apple TV series. I can see that. I can see that for him. Here's another photo of Matson at the time. Yeah. Now this looks like it's from the Epstein files. This photo looks pretty. You know, is he what's he holding his hand? Probably something that looks like a paper rolled up that looks like it doesn't look like smoking. That looks like, you know, I don't know what is in something through that paper. Yeah. Maybe you're right. So yeah. This is a this is what I mean by that is it one of you know, it's a 90s picture where it's like a flash picture in a room. Yeah. Yeah. And so this is a group of like European. They all look like they all look like dads who own boats. And yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This group is a group of like European businessmen from all over Europe. Sweden, Denmark, the UK, all over. Okay. And they come together to get the deal done with trust. They get the purchase done. And with bro. Yeah. At the very beginning of the summer, 1997. And I want to start the story here because the deal finishes. And Thomas and Peter Matzen immediately go to St. Tropez in the French Riviera to celebrate. Okay. And they live what's their gain from this deal? The company. They own the company now. They're behind your own trust. So trust. I guess I should tell you what trust is. Trust is an investment firm. And so trust or the purchase was, I want to say like $830. So I trust your own assets. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. It was $830 million crooner, which I suppose I should convert this to dollars. True. Crooner to dollars. About $88 million. Big deal. And but that was in the 90s. So let's see. 88 million. 183 million. So it's a hundred and eighty three million to dollar purchase. Transition to today. And then converted to dollars. So they were celebrating this purchase. Yeah. The two of them. And which makes sense because you look at this group. It's Yassander. And then these three and the two younger guys, they go to the beach to celebrate. And they stay there for two months. And I want to start with this part of the story because the two of them, they go bananas. They immediately get a yacht. And it's one of the yachts where it's got a helicopter, you know, it's got a helicopter landing pad. I was in Vegas for a friend's bachelor party and there was a taxi driver there who told us that he drives taxi all year. And then once a year, he spends all his money renting a boat and some fake gold jewelry. And then he invites girls out to his boat because he tells him he's a billionaire. And that's where he saves up all year to do is to rent a yacht for a weekend and pretend to be a billionaire. He's really rich. That's which is crazy. Yeah. But honestly though, like, I will say, I looked into this recently. I don't remember why. But I did look into it. I was like, I wonder what it cost to rent a yacht for the week. And like, not like a big yacht, but like a small, like 30 foot yacht. Yeah, they're 1500 a day, huh? Yeah, where you could like fit a few of your friends in there and you could just be on a yacht for the week. And it's actually there's some that are pretty affordable. You could get there are some where it's like for the week. It's like 15, 20 grand. And that brings us to this week's sponsor. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, actually, wait. Hold on. Hold on. Yeah. Hold on. We start a Chicago boat tour. And on that boat tour, we sell hot dogs. And then we call that boat tour yacht dog yacht dog. Oh, actually, you know, hold on trademark trademark. Just a restaurant. It's just a restaurant. You make reservations. You make reservations. So every it picks up every hour and there's a port. Everybody loads and loads out. But it's a restaurant. It's a restaurant. Yeah, you get a hot dog or a bridge. And we just dumped you on you. Yeah, that's a good. This is a dog. Dog is pretty cool. Yeah, dog. Chicago. That only works for half the year. Oh, you can close it in. Yeah, it's so insane. Heater is on the boat. So insane. Yeah, I think we got something here. I think we got an idea of patent pending trademark patent done patent done. It's not even pending. It's done. I said it's done. Is the domain available? Is your dog calm available? This will determine our entire business point. Man, my internet is going so slow right now. Right when we wanted to do fast. We needed to go fast. You know, dog. Let's see. Yeah, dog. We're just waiting. We're just waiting for it. This is so suspenseful. This is our entire future. I'll dump my life savings into this. This works. I'm not available. Someone's got it. Who? Who bought yacht dog? That's okay. Yeah, dogs cool though. Yeah, dog, dog calm and see. Where's it go? It is parked. Someone thought that this was a good investment. They were right. Can't stand people as parked domain. We're going to afford it. Maybe it depends how much they wanted it because now we just have to negotiate with them. I don't negotiate with. I don't negotiate with domain terrorists. Okay, so these guys that go to the French Riviera. Yeah, they get they buy one a yacht. They buy a big yacht and that's the thing because I've looked it up. When you run a yacht, you're running the fee for the time. But you also have to get a crew and pay for the crew and you have to pay for fuel. There's a lot of the extra expenses on top of it that are kind of not on the list price. But they get this yacht and they park it in the bay in the French Riviera. And it's one of the big 100 feet ones with the helicopter landing pad. And there was one place. This was not an area where there was helicopter pads everywhere. There was one restaurant with a big concrete roof that they could land on. And so that's where they landed their helicopter when they went to shore. You guys ready to go to Trito Joe's? All right. And they should I get my helicopter pilots license? No. You're too sad for that. Yacht dog. No, they and the thing about that restaurant is that restaurant had a like rooftop patio. And so they would land this helicopter and it would ruin everybody's meals. And so they would land. Now mad I would be. Well, here's the thing. They felt bad about it. So they would land and they would pay for everyone's meals and auto service for everybody. Oh, wow. Thank you for buying my chicken Parmesan. It's not going to bring it back on the floor. You freaking all over the place. My wife spilled her drink on herself. Her root beer. Her dream was to drink root beer in the French. The French River River River River. I thought Riviera stood for. She's in her root beer time right now. It's her root beer era. It's my root beer era. The French root beer era. And now you've taken that from us. And you think you're going to win us back. Who used bottle service? He used to say, man, no, I wanted that chicken Parmesan. I brought a chicken from home. I brought it to the French River River era. River era. And I said, hey, here's my chicken. I want you to eat this chicken. It was in my carry on. I had a chicken. It was really weird about it. I had a chicken in my carry on. And I said, I'm going to have them Parmesan on this chicken. So that's an Italian dish. That's pretty sick. It's an American Italian dish. You get that. All right. So yeah, I'm going to have the French do it. So this smells terrible. It's going to smell better when they cook it. It's dead right now. It's a dead chicken. That chicken, of course, it smells bad. Do you think I'm stupid? Gosh, do you say things I'm dumbed? And then and then these rich people have the audacity to helicopter blow off my Parmesan chicken. Yeah, my Parmesan chicken. Money can't buy what you've taken from me. I will destroy you. You have made an enemy for life. And I have the kind of enemy who takes dead chickens in my carry on. So sometimes we get the places in these bits. And I don't know how we got here. I don't know how to get out. Okay. So they have a helicopter. It goes from the rest. So funny. Rooting dinner reservations at the Riviera. Yeah. Yeah. And so they are, what I'm trying to illustrate is they're throwing just the craziest two-month solubility. Yeah, there's a major deal. Yeah. And across it, they bought 408 bottles of champagne. Seas. They had essentially an in-list beach party going on. You like champagne? Yeah. Got him. As soon as it got, this guy went to your college. You have it in the clause for the lifestyle agreement of the angel. We're not going to let him drink alcohol. He didn't sign it. And he didn't sign it. Revoque his degree right now. I got him. I got him to admit to it on tape. This whole podcast that I started 10 years ago. Was to get him admitting that you like champagne. I kind of actually like a little busco. But we found one that's not too sweet. That's actually, that's really good. Then they had basically an in-list beach party. There was, they went, the two of them, they went and they bought matching Ferraris. They bought a red one and a blue one. And here's what's crazy about it is they drove this off the lot. An hour later, they get to the beach. They park it. And he loses the Ferrari. And he never sees it again. Why? Thomas just sander. He's like loses it isn't like someone took it or like loses it. I was assuming someone took it. I was assuming someone took it. But he genuinely was just like, yeah, I parked it at the beach and then I couldn't find it. It was very next to yours. They only bought one, but they thought they bought two. They're so drunk on champagne. They were fast and they drive the danger of drinking. They're bulls in the car. He's in the back seat reaching over. They're doing the thing where his arms are going through the armpits. They're playing an improv game in the Ferrari. I'm driving. And they made it to the beach. And they get out and he's like, where are we at? What happened to the other Ferrari? I just want to point out, I was even thinking in my head quit interrupting Tim. He's got a lot of stuff and people in the comments are getting annoyed that I'm interrupting him so much. And then he was like, and I want you to know I tried. It's annoying that he's interrupting me right now. I, in my head, I was like, it's annoying that I'm doing this to the story. And then he did that. No, it was good. I was saying it wasn't my fault. Then they went to a Versace store and they get out of the car at the Versace store. Now they're driving together because they only have one property. Yeah, obviously. Peter leans over to Thomas and is like, I'm going to buy everything in that store so you can't buy anything. And he jumps out of the Ferrari and runs in the store. And I love that you and I have, these rich people have rich people games where it's like, I'm going to buy out that store so you can't buy anything. And then you and I have poor people games, which is, I'm going to hit your car. I'm going to hit your car with my car because both of our cars are junk and it doesn't matter. I like that that's our game. We've legitimately, we've legitimately, I've seen it in Tim's eyes. He and I have gotten in our cars. I have a junk car here in Kansas City. Yeah. And we've gotten into our vehicles after recording and we've looked at each other. And both of us thought we should, we should drive these cars to each other. He's pretty funny to do. And then both of us were like, nah, not today. But I can see in our eyes that it was a legitimate, like, yeah. Should we do it? Should we let our cars adieu each other? That's how I'm saying. And if we were rich, could you imagine? Yeah, for real though. I would, you know, it'd be pretty bad. I pull into the McDonald's drive through in front of you. In this scenario, we eat McDonald's again. We're rich. We don't care anymore. We don't care. Yeah. Oh, that's what I would do. We've got a Panda Express. I buy the whole line. You buy the Panda Express. I buy, you know, no, no, I say, don't actually can I have everything except for the mushroom chicken? And I leave that for you. I buy out everything except for that crappy mushroom chicken. And the barbecue, whatever that crap is. Whatever that is terrible. So he runs and he buys out the whole Versace store. So Thomas gets in and realizes this guy bought the whole Versace store. And he says, I'll buy everything else. And the guys, well, there's nothing else. He bought everything. He's like, no, like, I mean, all by the cash register, all by the door, all by the light bulbs. And so they literally like stripped the store. So we're like, it wasn't just like they bought who you're the manager. You know, I mean, like, you're the manager, not just you're the manager out of Versace store in the French Riviera. And it's a Tuesday. So you're not even the manager. You're the assistant manager at a Versace store that someone comes in. They buy all the product. You're living large. Yeah, you're like, you got a commission. Yeah, this is great. You're like, oh, yeah. And then another rich guy comes in and is like, oh, you're sold out everything. Yeah. Unfortunately, he's like, can I buy that light bulb? Can I have all the bolts? And then Alex Hermosi is in the back of your head. And he goes, sell it to him. He goes with his little breast strip. He goes, sell, sell. And this guy goes, yeah, you met by the light bulb. Because he's French, right? They're at the root in the piece. And so he's like, sure, you know what? You know what? We actually have a lot of light bulbs. Because once you get someone, it's easier and I learned this from Alex Hermosi. It's easy to sell something they've already bought. Yeah. No, you want one light bulb? I'll give you all the light bulbs. I'll give you all the light bulbs. And then this guy buys the, now you're the manager. You come in the next day. And everything. It looks like you got a rock. And I'm not just all the product, but it's like literally all the shelves every like screw anywhere. He took like it was like everything that could be removed. Yeah, he took. Yeah, if manager comes in the next day, assistant manager is just laying on the floor. And he's like, what happened? Oh my gosh, what happened? Assistant manager goes, I quit. I quit. I'm rich now. I'm rich now from the commission I made. What kind of commission do they make at those stores? I know I'm interrupting a lot. And I really try not to, but you wanted to do this whole tangent. You don't want to do this. What commission. There you go. Between four and six percent. So I mean, how expensive are the things? Average compensation for sales associate is between 68,000. I don't know. It's said between 68,000 and then there wasn't another number. So what does he do with all this stuff? They take it back to the boat. The crew is like, okay, you get to the helicopter. They're like, you can't take that stuff. They're like a cartoon with like the whole stack of stuff. And they're driving them back through the armpits. Left, other left. So they get back to the boat and they go, all right, you guys, hey, unload it. What do they do with it? I don't know what they do with it honestly. I have no idea. So, you see, it's my cash register from the Versace store. Yeah, that's actually the Versace store. It's all the stuff. He like reassembled it in his living room. Yeah, it's just a, it's a pretty basic cash register. Yeah, but to me, it's a special one. It reminds me of all the root beer. Did I drink there? Yeah, I've root beer there. I never know. You're too poor. You're too poor to know. I bet you like stuff like champagne. You've never tasted the root beer that we've had. Everything must go. Tillin's going out of business and saw our patron is now $6.99 for all. Those people will freak out. They don't know we're joking. Tillin is not going out of business. That was a joke. But we are reducing the price of Patriot at $6.99 for all tiers. You get every perk. You get access to discord. You get access to every episode. You high bit this much. It's so much. Oh my gosh, it is high. I know, but when you talk like that, it seems like we're really selling. I was trying to do a word selling bit. You know, I don't know. I'm a sleazy salesman. I want to make it. That's right. I straight up think that we've been doing that bit too long. That people are like, it's a little, this is the first time I've ever done the bit before. I was a sleazy salesman. No, we did the whole way before I was just a Tuesday. We did those bits. Just leave it all in. Do this whole thing. Join us on Patreon. So you standard later estimates that they spent in those two months, 50 million euros just celebrating. And so I want you to remember this. This scene. Meanwhile, Lord Muayn. Yeah, middle guy, right? Yeah. Lord Muayn. So the other two guys related? Related? I don't know. What do you think? No, not this guy. The other two guys. Go back to the one with all three of them. Not Lord Muayn. These two on the other side. You said those are the two that went and partied. The no. So Madison on the right. Uh huh. And your standard. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. So the younger guys. I was getting a mixed up a little bit. Yeah. And so Lord Muayn. Yeah. A little about him. He's the car wash guy. So Lord Muayn. His name is actually Jonathan. Very fashionable. Yeah. His name is actually Jonathan Guinness. And he is an heir to the Guinness family, like the Guinness. The Guinness. And so I don't know what that is. Yeah, I've never heard of. I'd be just like in the group here. I'm not falling for this again. I'm not falling for this again. We thought about it. Um Jonathan Guinness. He is an heir to the Guinness fortune. Um a little bit about the Guinness family. They did the beer. They also did the world records. I don't know if you knew this. The way that the decide bar, the way the world records started was the Guinness family. Um they noticed that people in bars were always like telling these tall tales at the bars. And then like I bet we could verify some of the stuff. And so the Guinness family was like let's put together a coalition to verify the tall tales. People tell it the bar. And so the world records book was like originally this effort to verify this stuff. Um and now it's kind of become a kids thing. Um but no it came crazy drunk. It's not become a kids thing. There's kids books. There's versions of it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also you've said that on the podcast before. Yeah. You've actually got him here. You just reached the Guinness world record for most times telling us to write a podcast. Guys come on in. We got the same story about the Guinness world records. I think it's only two but it's a lot. Some of some of those records these days are like that though where it's like oh yeah. You have to get them to come out to verify it. Like someone from Guinness has to show up and give you a little plaque like and it's like they don't just they're not like waiting around the corner and they happen to see you do it and they roll up on that record. That's where it's like there's some beef in the comedy world because yeah because a certain comedian just had to do the Guinness world record come out for the most ticket sold and another comedian who has sold four tickets is like that's dumb. Yeah. Yeah. And there's the beef. Yeah. Which is kind of like I don't know like we we talked about this recently like all these like business awards that you can get. Yeah. You pay for those. And like that's kind of the way that that world works. Yeah. I'm going to pay for one for our cleaning business. Yeah. But it's like I'm going to I'm going to I'm an I'm an I'm an I'm going to no I was going to pay for it for the best new business in Glendale. Yeah. And it's like it's like but it but there is something about it that like works. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just a marketing point. Yeah. You can be like so you can be like. Hey did you hear about us because we're one of the best new businesses last year. Is that how you heard about us? No you didn't but we were one of the best businesses last year. That's crazy. It cost me $14,000. What? It cost me $14,000. It cost me $14,000. And after I signed the check I went to the French Rootbeary era. So kind of landed as helicopter at my for my chicken parmed dinner. Parmed flew away. It's got me my chicken parmed fly away. So get out of the get his uh he's a Lord heir to the records heir to the records uh yeah this is this is the record boy don't forget it um well the well the aristocrat yeah lorded or knighted so he's because my lord moan I don't know where the moan came from yeah I started going by that I feel like it should be Lord Guinness but anyways lord moan and so he has a lot of I don't want to say political sway but like I guess um societal sway because he's a knight and because he's heir to the Guinness fortune and so he's seen as like a legitimate businessman um he hasn't done a lot of legitimate business activity he's just an heir to the family but like he has a lot of you also get knighted do you get paid to get knighted that's fine now I think you have to do something significant um well yeah I would hope you know but it used to be you had to go out and kill dragons and save the princess now it's just like oh yeah you made a lot of money no yes okay to get knighted yeah you did the okay whatever um you used to have to go out so yeah you cannot pay to get knighted you cannot you cannot buy or pay for genuine official knighthood that's an honor is given by the government um it does say sometimes there are incidental expenses like travel hotel informal clothing for the ceremony uh there are novelty titles you can purchase if you want to buy one online yeah it's like a certificate that's a something it's just like when you buy a star my mind that one that's fine that's crazy that like that's yeah we can we name a star yacht dog and then he wanted a star is called yacht dog heavens and came upon yacht dog uh sir so Madsen had already worked with Moine on a Guinness securities limited organization which was like a little investment operation um kind of small not huge so they had been working together before uh the other guy Lindsey small bone on the left this is him older um he wasn't it hadn't been involved with any of them he was like a hire that they found they needed someone who understood this world a little bit better sure so they brought him in on the deal and so what they wanted to do this was just a corporate buyout really yeah um and for all intents and purposes the mastermind behind all this was Lord Moine okay allegedly but there was this other guy by the name of Joachim Posner and we'll call him the ghost this is Joachim Posner okay Posner uh up until about a year before this deal got done this was about a four year deal that they were on he was in prison um yeah and he was in prison for a financial crime uh he had a few years before that uh he he spent years in Denmark as a tax attorney figuring out ways to limit people's tax burdens corporate tax burdens uh and he had um I guess the technical term for is plundered the corporate assets linked to Tallinn group which was a client of his and so he was able to embezzle funds out of this out of this company he got caught it and he got a seven year prison sentence okay um and so he was serving that prison sentence and while he was in that prison he's a fraudster um I mean yes technically speaking yes he's a fraudster but it's not I don't know if I would use the word fraud though to define it because he's he's a white collar criminal okay and so he was working as a tax attorney okay he kind of padded the books to pull some money for himself as what he did sure and so I don't know if I mean I guess it's technically fraud but it wasn't your typical like I'm tricking this person it was I'm some of that they trusted that I'm taking skimming some money off the top sort of situation okay okay okay it's what he was doing um but it was such an in like explosive thing for him he had a family he lost contact to his wife and his daughter like they they left and he lost custody and like they vanished from his life sort of situation lost his home obviously went to prison lost his job um and so it was like a devastating outcome for him uh especially considering until they got caught he had a he had a year or two where he was living pretty large because he had scanned a lot of money off and so he's in prison and he's kind of reflecting on uh his life now and he realizes I can never go back here the problem is I can never go back to the career I was in and I'm never going to attain the same level of success I had before right and so he uh well he begins to plot and he says well uh what are some ways I can get back into this world uh this financial world and he's like there's there's not going to be a legal way for me to do it but if I can get in then I can kind of you know work all the way up and then be be legitimate once I'm in he's like I'm gonna need some help and so he spends some time uh I guess this is like a uh Denmark prison thing um but he would get these leaves almost and while he was gone like while he got his little prison leave oh they let him go I don't know but I do know like they described he would get his prison leave and while he was on leave he would pick up a bunch of corporate like business investing magazines and then he would research the all the companies inside them to understand all right all right it's time for your weekend if once a year just uh you know don't go too far and uh make sure you come back because if you don't come back we're going to be pretty mad so but uh this is Denmark so we're going to be pretty mad you know oh enjoy the French route me area it's this is a lot like in COVID when we were like we're gonna start the world down on Tuesday so you got four days uh four days live it up so um all right while you're in prison the rest of the year but this is your week off so have fun and uh come back we'll see you next Monday I don't I genuinely don't understand but he said whenever he was away he would go get all these magazines yeah wonder they let me out twice a year okay okay um and so he would come back and he kept a notebook and in that notebook he put together this grand plan um and he's he talked about how he's like he's like it really could have been any business I bet you could google that and figure that out rather than us just sitting here being like today is lonely what are you talking about I bet you could figure it out uh yeah in Denmark eligible prisoners can be granted temporarily leave to leave the facility and so what there are let me see wow that's kind of crazy the failure rate is is very low it says roughly 97 percent of individuals return successfully without violating the terms with relief so they just show back up it's like okay it's my time to come back to prison uh hey he's out hey good good good man yeah come over from dinner on Friday and Saturday we're hanging out and what you got on Tuesday you doing anything on Tuesday I mean I gotta go back on Tuesday down back to prison yeah so they they give them weekend weekend visits or family events the let them leave for family events um and yeah but this is this is an open they have open and closed facilities so open facilities are things like financial crimes are non-dangerous client criminal offenses well that makes sense where closed prisons are are dangerous offenders can they get jobs then while they're in open facilities we should we should we just do it all leave regularly it sounds like it sounds like you can only leave like you have to do it on the other prison systems oh my gosh yeah actually that would be interesting huh um okay so why is on leave he would get these they hear about how we do it and they're like what they're like you do what those are people you put them in a field and Kansas and you just forget about it you just like pretend they don't know where the prisons are they're just kind of out in the middle of nowhere yeah actually yeah a lot of people don't they a lot of people couldn't even tell you where the closest prison is yeah you know the closest prison is uh probably up north and what's that town called where they got that military base in the prison eleven worth eleven worth it's not the closest no hold on let me think then give me a second oh downtown or is that just a county jail yeah that's a jail like a prison yeah okay what's the closest do you know no I don't live here though I think you just confidently we're like no that's not the closest no I don't know there was another no because uh what's the prison that I would go to all the time that's the one I would go do the ministry stuff uh oh I don't know where that was that you did that I thought that was out of sync Kansas oh I thought that was out of state that you did that it was in Kansas oh I guess yeah I guess that is out of state prison let's search just google maps prison where's the prisons near me prison near me northland correctional how they open one of their hours that's a correctional facility number on there literally uh it's on Truman Road that's like right here in independence um and then there's hilltop school juvenile and then uh oh wow why a county detention center is over here the county detention center is in Kansas to Kansas yeah but the detention centers are different than prisons yeah Jackson County corrections like short term why are they like you're there for a couple months yeah yeah prison prison is like it's gonna be out here it's gonna be a lancing uh let's yep lancing correctional here you go is that closer than the number worth yeah way closer really not way closer it's on the way but this is not where it was lancing the one I went to was way out in the middle of nowhere okay because look here's leavenworth yeah yeah which leavenworth is leavenworth yeah you know yeah if you don't know about leavenworth it's a small mountain town in Washington uh it's very beautiful and peaceful and wonderful to go to no it's uh the leavenworth is like the us pin like that's where like michael fake was there for a while yeah they put like the the big big name offenders wasn't the dark night shooter guy there for a while no he was in the springfoot one that's right that's right that's right yeah um we keep track of our you know a lot of people have fantasy football drafts and we keep track of our favorite criminals and we go which prison are they at right now so we write up letters you know who my favorite prisoners are we're talking a lot about prisons yeah we are you know my her prisoners are all of you listening to this podcast if you're listening to this and you're at a correctional facility we hope you enjoy your leave when you when you get to leave uh should have done your crime and then you should have done it you should have done it in Denmark uh no so you're keeping he would go on his leave yeah and he would get these these magazines and he had a little notebook where he was plotting his next big fix where he was gonna make make some money sure and he finds his company in his mind uh uh he knew he was going to have to do something illegal to pull this off but he wanted so he wanted to do like one big job and then go go straight it wasn't even one big job it was it was he wanted to find a way for him to break into the financial sector and so he was it wasn't really about doing a job it was finding a way in but he knew for him to get in he was going to have to take over a company and the only way that was going to be possible is for him to break at least some laws uh okay and so but he was he was trying to do it as clean as possible was his okay okay what he wanted to do um because he didn't want to go back to prison and like he really did not want to have to go back um uh and so he was trying to figure out a way to do this as as uh above board as he could and so he targets trust her and the reason why he targets trust or um is a couple things one they have um a large set of assets yeah they operate you can hide a lot of money there so you can hide a lot of money and more importantly you can then go and attempt to purchase out the companies that you right owned in there too so he could kind of had this multi-tier pretty deep well yeah companies that he has an ownership of but the other thing about it is they had an a b uh stock system and what that means is there are two types of shares there are a shares and b shares right b shares you have one vote uh per share a shares you have 10 votes per share and so the so whoever owns the majority of the a shares has majority control of the company right and so all you have to do is manage to get 17% of uh the a shares and then you run the company right and what he realizes is in the 90s there was a series of uh changes to the financial market in uh really the whole of Europe uh that made the laws um for a lot of acquisition stock market all sorts of financial movement a lot easier um the regulations kind of cleared up for a second um they ended up coming back pretty hard um but for a second they got pretty loose and he found he there was opportunity for him to exploit this hey October 22nd we're doing till alive as part of the fountain city comedy festival here in Kansas City you got to tillin.com slash live for more information you get passes this is gonna be more than just us oh yeah that's like legitimately not an advertisement right now the festival's pretty sick like there's a really great lineup a lot of really good comics this thing's been growing a lot the past couple years so really cool to be the part of it uh and so hopefully we'll see you there so what he did is he contacts his cousin Thomas okay uh which uh we we met Thomas right Thomas had a great a great summer um and he tells Thomas here's what I'm thinking I'm gonna need your help to recruit a team of people no one can know I'm a part of this and so you're gonna be my mouthpiece I'm gonna call you all the time you're gonna basically talk through like I'm gonna talk through you in all these deals um but we're gonna need to bring a handful of other people into this um because no one's gonna believe that you are actually trying to buy this company everyone's gonna be like Thomas is too dumb first of all first of all nobody thinks I'm dumb it's like Thomas Thomas you look at the corner store everything you don't you get by trust her uh so Thomas luckily knows Peter Matheson right Mattsons in that deal with right lord and so this is a great opportunity for the connection because the lord is going to open a lot of doors for them and just having a lord be a part of this deal and that's what even made uh what do we say his name was oh love per oh love that's what made per oh love even interested yeah interested in the steel oh there's a lord in ball yeah and then they brought in Lindsay um I love lords because they don't have to do their hair or order care about their tie he he he he he he forgot what I'm a lord oh whoever cares um and so they go to put this deal together and uh it is years long of kind of coaxing uh the trustor board to agree to this um meanwhile uh y'all came he gets out of out of prison right and he realizes okay we're gonna have to have some upfront financing to make this happen um and so he talks to uh you sander Thomas and he's like I need you to go find someone who's willing to finance this whole thing so he finds a billionaire who's willing to put the funds up front and for as like a short term loan take sure back but Thomas is like you know what the terms of this deal aren't very good I think I can go get a loan from the mob and I think I can get better term from the mob um and so which is surprising so I told you what I learned the other day what I area what about the mob and when I where I live in LA there's some there's a mob and uh I was told the other day was like hey deal with these group people deal with these group people don't deal with this group people yeah because and with no one certain terms he said that's the mob oh oh thanks for telling me good to know thanks for thanks for making that nice and clear I like having a heads up I like knowing exactly who's mob and not mob hey I think they should have to wear shirts hey I think you don't wear a shirt if you're the mob and a mob or going through a divorce I mean you should have I'm the mob I'm also going through a divorce I'm in the mob and I'm getting divorced party hats stuff like little parties okay so he takes a mob load and but here's the thing he realizes uh huh they they're gonna ink this deal yeah he's got a day to make the the payment to transfer the money to come quick so you so they're gonna have to have the money but as he's looking they're gonna have to have cash on hanging for yeah as he's looking through the terms of the deal he realizes oh we can extend that timeline a little bit and so what we can do is instead of having a day to pay back the loan we can take five days to take back to pay back the loan but when we sign that deal we immediately have control over the company we have controlling share the company so what they do is they sign it over uh huh they get the company and then now on paper lord lord moin is the director of the company okay but really what moin what moin did was it was yellow keem's signature that went through and so yellow keem is the director of the company okay and so he owns the company and what they do immediately is they remove the board because they have controlling share they're removing what you could say what they want and Lindsay comes in as the the chairman of the board let's see small bone is the sole chairman of the board okay yesander and Madison they immediately take two separate trips one of them goes to sweeten to the main bank of trust or where they're located one of them goes to london and okay the one who goes to london opens up a new bank account at uh barklies uh and Charles yes Charles barklies banking london hey welcome to Charlie Charles barkly bank hey when he's there he's respectful sorry hi welcome to Charles barklies bank would you like to open an account Charles barkie doing a British I'm not gonna do an impression I don't want you to try I don't want you to try doing Charles barkly doing a British accent nope I'm gonna do it I'm gonna do it what do you think it's favorite beer is they open up they open up third new bank account uh and uh they transfer it was an insane amount yeah like seven hundred and thirty million uh from the Swedish bank to the bark these bank now this sounds like it would raise alarms but this is a major corporate buyout that just happened yeah and so having the new corporate entities set up a new bank account and then transfer the funds not totally crazy no red flags not not a lot of red flags and then as a part of that transfer they then transfer that money they transfer chunks of that money to all the new majority shareholders this is what they call their compensation package for taking their their their part as takeover okay and then they pay two hundred million which was the the purchase price um two per oh lot but that was trusters of money so they didn't actually pay a dime of their own dollars to buy this company they just took advantage of this five day gap to then take over control of the assets and then pay pay per oh lot that with his own money with their the company's own money and now they own the company which this is hold on you smaller numbers here i have a company that's worth one million dollars yes you come in i give you five days you say i want to buy your company yeah okay we signed the papers now you own it be a five days to pay me yes and i sold it to you for a million dollars well i mean i think i think what you would have to say you would have to assume because the company had more assets than was the sellable value of the company okay okay so like we have three million dollars in assets yeah i'm selling it to you for a million dollars yeah you come in i signed the papers you have five days to pay me a million dollars yeah you take over all the assets now you take over the assets of three million you sell a million of it well i know you just pay you a million out of the corporate amount yeah but now you have two million assets like you don't have that cash yeah but you have the company that you didn't have for before and you didn't pay a cent to get it yeah but i'm bought out like i'm out of it yeah you're gone per oh off is out yeah and they and i should say they funneled that money so that money went from uh they went from the original trust account yeah that was the thing that ended up being funny because they found out about this after they took the loan so they did to pay back the mob loan too okay but that the funds went from the original trust or bank account to the new bank account that they set up to all of the new shareholders accounts and then from lord moine 200 went to oh love per oh love so he thought oh he paid me he all he saw is the wire from lord moine he's like oh he paid me the two hundred million i got my two hundred million i walked end of story for him yeah but remember the next day medicine and you see under ghost been 50 million euros in the french ruby area right and this raises some red flags for legislatures and they're like where did these guys get all this money from the cash register one of their questions and why are they so okay with blowing it here who are these guys and so they started looking into them because here's the thing wow technically this is the thing if you're gonna do something like this you gotta make sure you don't have too dumb up you need you need dumb people in your operation because you don't want them to catch on to what you're doing and then try to get a bigger stake yeah but you also don't want to be so dumb yeah that they end up blowing you up because they're like we went and bought some for ours and lost one of them exactly yeah like what do you mean you lost one of them what is I don't know that clearly I had already don't have I don't know where it is now it's lost we got a yacht dog though no and so they're partying in the french ruby area yola came and the other guys meanwhile are in London and they set up a legitimate business right they get an office they run an office they furnish it they they take over the current client base and they are operating as if they are a legitimate business right and I mean I shouldn't say they spent good money to set up this nice office but to be fair like you can kind of justify it because it's like you're a financial services corporation serving high and clients like it's kind of gotta be upscale but they went really upscale for example yola came for his office he bought literally Napoleon's desk and he's like that Napoleon used this desk this is my desk now which is pretty fitting but anyways that's crazy and so there's some some pretty big expenditures from them too sure but nothing like what these guys are doing the French Riviera also they're working and those guys are partying the French Riviera yeah and so this brings regulators who are like let's take a look at these guys they are doing some digging and really what happened is it is while it is almost everything they did here is technically legal except for the mob loan and also you can't buy a company with the company's money and so even though technically once that deal was done all the money in there's yours the money that bought that company can't come from within that company that's illegal and so why because you can't you get afford the company but I can now you give it to me but now that I can now that I know that is my company I can afford this you didn't you have to be able to prove that you can if you give me a car and the trunk is full of cash and I say I'll pay you $10,000 for this you give me the car what's in the car's mine I give you $10,000 you sold me a car with a trunk full of cash that's a fact now it had $20,000 of cash in the trunk yeah that's a better analogy than I was used in earlier yeah yeah there you go you know but you agreed to sell it to me for $20,000 that's on you for having a weird dash in your name yeah but I think I think the point is like you didn't you didn't actually buy the company then like even though there was there was beneficial terms that said hey you can wait five days to make the payment you still at the time of purchase have to have the money to pay even if it's not like liquid money that you're waiting for where it's like there's a term that you can wait technically that's the law why I guess I don't know so that way so that way random people can't just buy companies and then drain the money to buy them I don't know I don't I mean I mean it seems like a sketchy way to buy things but anyways so Joaquin starts to catch wind that the Fed is on to them or whatever their version of the Fed is sure and the Fed and so he is like I'm leaving and so he just runs meanwhile the rest of them they get caught and they go to trial and throughout trial long story short Lord Moin he's a Lord he's gonna get off and so he ends up his defense ends up getting like I am annoyed and they're like so sorry to bother you so sorry about that please get out of here uh Lindsey small bone on the other hand he was brought in pretty late and he was able to make the defense that he had no idea they were doing any of this and he's like he's like I was just hired I was brought in to be a very low on those guys who were imparted yeah and so Madison I think this was pretty heavily his collect connection to Lord Moin was also able to make a similar defense that he was not aware yeah of all these things you sander being cousins with Joaquin and looking like an Apple TV villain out of much harder time making his defense and he ended up actually and also having a name that sounds like a lizard you sander yeah and so he ends up he ends up having to serve a few years for his crime but they yeah we got weekends off so yeah but the real white whale for the Fed was Joaquin but he ran and so for years they're searching for him and almost a decade goes by and they still have no idea where he is they're now into the early 2000 so in the early 2000s they do one of those age age advancement things and so this is what they think he probably looks like oh no oh no did they say ten years down the line did they give him a lazy guy looks like this for the audio listener here's what it is he is it's the picture that they showed so he's it's black and white he's got a little bit of a goatee going on and then he's got the 1960s Paul McCartney hair yeah um just poorly fit on top of his head yeah and uh it really is like they took the exact same photo made his face a little chunkier gave him a goatee and a bad haircut removed the glasses and then I do think you're right I do think they push that eye overlay I think they gave him a lazy guy push that eye over there like yeah what if he's go back to the other one they're like what if he's got a lazy guy now I don't know maybe not I don't know I think I think because of the way the glasses warped the other one yeah it makes it look it makes it look like a lazy guy but he's got way too curly hair here yeah all of a sudden he has fine straight black edna from the incredible hair cut and wow so okay so he goes on the run and he looks like the guy who invented root beer I think he's on the run they're never going to find it with that picture never gonna find them no and they don't they never find them he's still on the run well uh earlier this year a documentary came out this has been released on Netflix called the Truster scandal and they brought all these guys back uh so here's you sander you sander in this is bragging about how much money he has how wealthy he has yeah um obviously uh and then this is Madison um and then they get uh uh yoakeem to agree to be on the documentary says what gonna show my face because I'm still on the run and throughout they did like he would the camera would be behind him when he would talk um but here's the thing throughout the documentary the documentary and like builds trust with him and this was clearly the sort of situation where they had been meeting with him for years for a couple of years and about halfway through the documentary they said we had been having some conversations and yoakeem basically was like you know what like the statute of limitations on financial crimes is 10 years and so we're nearing 30 years at this point and he's like he's like i'm well past the statute of limitations he's like i think it's time for me to tell my full story and like actually be on camera and so this is what they thought he would look like 10 years later and this is what he actually looked like this is a side by side of him no no first close nowhere close yeah yeah he looks like urban man he does like just like urban with me and it's crazy um and so what he did is he uh immediately when got he got word that things were going south he flew to Brazil he got some plastic surgery he took a couple million dollars we got some plastic surgery yeah what did he done i don't know exactly what he got done uh he didn't define it he probably extended his jaw out a little bit yeah maybe he doesn't really had that much though like you i could see this you can see a big guy yeah for sure but like if i was see this guy on the street i wouldn't be like that's yoakeem yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah um especially if my reference was this guy if i was looking for a guy with this no go go back does he have a lazy eye have we figured that out no they just did that to him for no reason yeah that's brutal okay and then what he did is he bounced around and so he would he would only spend a couple months in every place he would go to for a decade um and he literally was all over the world Brazil is real uh Nicaragua the states across Europe like he would just bounce around um and he wouldn't stay anywhere for very long living off of the couple million that he took with him and so he would just use very little bit and very conservative um until uh until he was in the clear which now he's he is in the clear he had invested some of that and so put some of that in like a stowaway uh fund yeah a couple trusts that he could disguise and so now he's kind of living off returns and he is living well like there are scenes in the documentary where he ends up welcoming you into his like home and it's like it's not crazy but it is a nice home that he lives in um he's doing well for himself uh and he to this day he says the only illegal thing i did was um the mob loan the mob loan um because he says even though take and honestly he's probably more on the run from that well he paid that loan back and so when whenever they got control of the company they didn't immediately he immediately took the money and yeah um but um yeah because he says he says they're trying to say that what i did was illegal but i was just taking advantage of a system that didn't recognize the loopholes it had um i mean saying it was legal immediately after this case they close that loophole so uh you do not have any control over the asset until it's paid for and so like the money has to pass for you to have right right um and so there can be you can be net 30 net 60 net 90 but until the payment passes through you have no control over any asset that's smart yeah and so uh but this is uh i mean as far as i'm aware the first and last time anyone's ever bought a company with the company's own money that's crazy yeah yeah wow and he got away with it too fiddle off hey thanks for listening to this this episode of things I learned last night if you liked it and you want another one uh speaking of guys on the run frank abing nail junior was a uh it was the guide from the catch me if you can move you remember Leonardo played him and Tom Hanks was running after him but uh so we we do a whole story about his life and all the things that he did and then we have a very shocking twist that the you know i don't want to give away i want you to listen the episode so i go check that out if you haven't uh also next week's episode is available right now on our patreon that's a way to help support the show help grow it another way to help help support the show is just to share it give us a podcast review comment below um those are all free ways to help us grow the show and we really appreciate you doing all of that so anything else you want to add cut it off so


Imagine parking your brand-new Ferrari at the beach, walking down to the water for a couple of drinks, and then… never seeing that Ferrari again. Not stolen. Not towed. Just gone. And imagine you’re so absurdly, incomprehensibly rich that you genuinely don’t care. That’s not even the wildest part of this story. That’s just Tuesday for the guys who pulled … Read More

Prospera: The Libertarian “Paradise” That Bullied an Entire Country

09-15-26

Episode Transcription

Hey man, what's up? Have you heard of Adam and Emily Foster? Yeah, yeah, yeah, they had that song that what's up? They're the the foster people or what what's the people? What about them? They're having a baby boy. Hey, congratulations guys, we're so excited for you. They messaged us on Facebook and they were like, hey, could you tell us what the baby is going to be? And we just guess. No, congratulations, you're having a baby boy. Some name recommendations. If it's, you know, I know you're not there. I know right now you're like, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, you guys are like, yeah, oh, we should do the Michael Scott thing where it's like, you know, but I know you guys are celebrating right now. I really like the name Jaren. Oh, interesting. Just want to put it out there or tip. Oh no. So congratulations. And you know, we're very excited to be the male role models in this baby boy's life. Let's get to the episode. Hey man, what's up? Have you ever heard of Prospera? Yes, this is what Joel Osteen preaches. Oh, he preaches Prospera. Honestly, if you know, can I do a Joel Osteen? I don't think I can. I'm going to be honest with you. It's just slightly southern, but you know, he's rich. You know what I mean? That accent. Yeah. And God said, no, yeah. And God said, dude, this is my Bible thing. That'll get you there. This is my this is my Bible. This is my Bible. There are many like it, but this one is mine. So I don't know what I guess. I think a confident guy just gives you a limp hand. I think that that. That's Celsius is hitting me wrong right now. There's the. It's hitting me in the wrong way. It's hitting me sideways. Things I learned last night. This is my this. This is my Bible. Yes, that's it. I think that's it. That's the voice. That's it. My Bible. This is my Joel Osteen. Hear my Bible. I like it. This was mine. Give us your money. What? This is this is his line. This is my Bible. There are many like it. No, I was off because I thought it was modeled off. This is my rifle. This is my gun. But what is that? It's like an army thing. It's like an army thing. The army thing. This is my rifle. This is my gun. There are many like it, but this one is mine. And there's something else here. This is my rifle. This is my gun. There is the enemy. Now there are none. It's it's like a fun little thing that they teach the Marines. Yeah, because they're dumb. Oh, it's not actually from the army. It's from the movie full metal jacket. Gosh, it's so fun. This is crazy. I knew it was in full metal. I knew it was in full metal jacket, but I thought it was like real, but it says real. They're sat, satirizing military indoctrination. They're doing what? Satirizing. Yeah. And now that I'm now that I'm realizing this is not a friendly quote for a podcast. Anyways, so Joel Osteen, though, is this is my Bible. I am what it says I am. I have what it says I have. I can do what it says I can do. Today, I will be top of the word of God. I boldly confess my heart is alert. My heart is receptive. I'll never be the same. And Jesus named my men. So can you name it, Jackson? There's my Bible. It's an army thing. And so what is Prospera? Oh, yeah, that's right. Prospera. So Prospera is a place in Robotan Honduras. Robotan is an island in Honduras. Yeah, the ships go there. What? Yeah, I get off the boats here. Oh, really? Robotan is a beautiful island. Robotan's beautiful. It's awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah, look right there. There's the coast. Is that really? That's not where the cruise is on. But there is a cruise ship port there, because I get off the boat. And yeah, we get off in a robotan. Yeah, Robotan, a couple things about it. It's a hunter and I flew home from here last time in like the southern Caribbean. Yeah. And this barrier reef around it is part of the second largest barrier reef in the world. Okay. So beautiful, beautiful island. Lots of like just a lot of culture there. Very, very cool place. Yeah. And Prospera is this community on the island that you know, as we're getting into this, I kind of want to like, you remember that girl I dated who was like a missionary to Honduras? No. Desk. Oh. And I forgot I called her desk. Yeah, you called her desk. I also think about this too. Now that we're married, we're just supposed to just not talk about supposed to forget about. And it's like, there's so much material I could mine from those girls. I dated it because I dated a lot of dumb girls. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know, but anyway, that girl got shot by the way. She's fine. She did good shot. Not in her under. But, uh, no, but that's yeah, she lived in Honduras. It's so crazy. I just think it's crazy that you dated this girl and I just you called her desk for like a year. Yeah. Very rude. Yeah. I was like, oh, yeah, you're like, oh, yeah, desk. And it's not funny. It's so dumb. Hey, you thought it was so funny. That was hilarious. And I think it's hilarious. It's not funny. It was really rude. I did think it was funny. And I actually do think it's funny. So I can't think about Honduras without revisiting the past. But go ahead. Okay. So in like the 70s or 80s, there was a kid by the name of Octavio Sanchez. Uh, cool name was, uh, in 16, he wrote a political sci-fi book. And the concept of the book was he was getting these pamphlets, uh, like government bulletins from the Honduran government from the year 2050, like painting the picture of like where Honduras got. Okay. And so it was like, it was this whole, it was kind of a sci-fi kind of like a political triities of like, here's my vision for what our society could be. Sure. And keep in mind, this is a 16 year old kid. Um, and he just, this is what it does in his free time. He puts the book out. Um, and basically the, the concept was that, uh, Honduras, he said, it's not poor because like there was a lack of like capacity of the people in Honduras to go out and become wealthy. It was a broken institution of the government. Okay. And so it was, I mean, to put it bluntly like a libertarian dream is like what the book was. It was like, we need to remove all, all legislations, all, all requirements, everything that stops businesses from being able to just go fast. Be business. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Um, and this kind of became like a rules and yeah, regulations. Yeah. Yeah. Safety, all that kind of stuff. Yeah, protections, anything like that. Sure, sure, sure. Um, and so this was like kind of like a folk thing in this libertarian community for a couple decades. Um, and then in 2009, uh, a economist who ended up becoming a Nobel laureate by the name of Paul Romer. This is Paul Romer. Okay. Um, and I do have a picture of Octavio Sanchez. This might spoil some things this picture, but he did. I'm not reading any of the texts. I'm not reading anything. We got back to that. Yeah. He's the guy in the left. Which left are left? Okay. So you're right. The guy who looks like he's afraid of the camera guy. Yes. Like I was like, I know that guy. I know that guy. Because like, oh, I don't believe in my libertarian journey. I didn't know that you were the camera guy for this event. So, uh, Paul Romer, he puts out this TED talk on what he calls charter cities. And charter cities is what he gets his Nobel prize for. Okay. Um, have you heard of charter cities? You made a face like you have. I'm just worried about where this could go. Why? I just want to hear how your ideas. I think you know why I'm a little worried, but I want to hear it out. Uh, so a charter city. So basically, the idea is that, um, our legal system today is, uh, not conducive for business. You can't have a business that grows and is successful in the current legal system. There's too much red tape. And so he said for years, the business world has been lobbying in Washington to try to change this and make it easier to do business in the world. Um, and he says, this is a fool's errand. He said, he said, you're never going to a mass enough political will to make a big enough change that it really matters. And he says it's better to start with a clean slate. And so what he wanted to do is he wanted to establish charter cities. And so this was a relationship with, uh, municipalities, not really referencing where, but a municipality where you would then carve out some privately and in that, in that municipality and build your own dream city. And the city then would be run self-sufficient. It would not be using any of the resources of the outside municipality would not be connected. It was just, it just owns the land and does what it wants to do inside that land. So everything education, police, uh, infrastructure, it's all, it's own thing. It's all self-contained. And then rules, regulations, laws, it's all whatever they think makes the most sense for their right private charter citizens. My charter citizens. It's like a charter school. For example, if you're like, okay, what's an example of a charter city, it is Walt Disney's dream for Epcot. Actually. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty. Or it's like, I get to make the decisions. I get to make all the rules from what happens here. I get to make all the rules. Yeah. Because everybody else. And and I pose the question to you, listener, what could go wrong? You know, why not let a rich guy decide everything in your life in this little walled-off city? It's an interesting, that's an interesting point. It's a great question. I can't think of anything. I mean, that guy's rich. He must know better than me. He must be smarter than me. So Sanchez must be smarter than me, a dumb poor. So Sanchez kind of commits his life. I will say, though. I am smarter and I probably should be. You know, that's when I see stuff on social media, and I just go, ah, what? I don't like that you have the same level of voice that I have. You guys. I don't like the deal. I know what you're talking about. I've thought it before. The way that you were there. I understand that's not a great thought. I understand how Alex's fingers are ready to type right now. What I mean is that like you see people say stuff. Yeah. That's so not their best interest. Not even that. No, no, no, no, no, not because I don't have their best interest in my. I don't care what I mean is like they're saying something that you're like, what you're saying doesn't even make sense. Yeah, at all. Yeah. And you're right here on the internet being like, here's what I think. And you're like, hey, you need people. I just think we need more idiots like in our houses. You know, in our families where you had a family dumb. Yeah. And like kind of made fun of the family dumb and you isolated them. Family dumb. You need to start isolating the dumb. That's stuff with Thanksgiving. And you need the rest of the family to have enough backbone to be like, hey, that's stupid. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you know what? Doesn't happen now as everyone just goes like, and then they go to living room and they're like, you know, a stupid thing. I mean, he said he's not Thanksgiving anymore. That's what I'm saying. I think you have to you have to invite them to Thanksgiving to confront their stupidity and be around them. Does this make sense? Alex is looking at me like this is we're telling a good line right here. There is a toe for sure. There is a toe. Alex verdict. I don't know. Wrong, dumb, wrong, dumb. Shame him. Shame him. No matter what he said. Can you agree with me? Can you agree with me or disagree with me? Oh, no, you want to hear. I just want to know which I just want to know if he he he audibly clicked his mic off. That was funny. All right. Well, anyway, I agree with you. We've built a society that is much more isolated and that isolation breeds mold and these ideas are mold. I sort of yes. I think I probably could have worded a little more delicate. But at the same time, I couldn't know. And you know, yeah, I do think like I do think we we have allowed these people to separate from the communities that would correct them. Yes. And I think that's a problem. Those people. Yeah, I'm I mean, I'm bad ideas. No, I think I've had bad ideas, but I at least have some people who go. Yeah, you know what? But bad ideas are a different breed of bad ideas. Do you know what, though? We've we were talking about earlier, the level of of growth that we've had in the last 11 years. Yeah, I'd say probably probably more than that, probably 13, 14 years. I mean, I think I think go back through our podcast, like listen to I mean, especially me, the things I was saying at the beginning of our podcast versus now. Yeah, there was an episode I remember where I was like, I mean, I think the fire department should be private. Yeah, I was like, I'm a perfectly okay. And you live apart fully within on that too. Yeah, I used to genuinely. And you know what you need? You need a smarter friend. Uh, bigger, stronger, more handsome friend to say, hey, that's pretty dumb, buddy. And then what happens is that you fight back a little bit, you go, no, no, no, defensiveness. And then like two years later, you go, remember when I thought that dumb thing? Yeah. And it's like, yeah, dude, parks the thought you hear pressure conversations, peer pressure works. No, you do bring up a good point that I actually really wanted to talk about today. So I'm glad you brought this up. Okay. I saw it's Sarah Silverman clip today where she was talking about how I think you should leave. Most of the bits are confronting toxic masculinity, which I've never thought about before. But she used the example of the interview at one where he like does the interview he walks out? Oh, yeah. And he pulls, yeah, he pushes the door already. I put whatever. And the guy's like, I think it's a pull. And he's like, no, it goes both ways. And he didn't just like grids through and pushes it. Yeah, yeah. So it's like, you're not willing to accept that you're wrong. And she gets a couple of other examples. And so I was thinking I was like, what are some, it's just what are some like toxic masculinity things that are like common in the world today that like are under thought of? And I'm going to be. Oh, great. I'm going to go on woke. I can hear the people listening right now. They're like, oh, my gosh. We finally got Jared to quit crashing on his podcast. And now we got Tim lecturing us from his Subaru. Hong Kong, baby. I just took a shot of oatmeal. Can I'm ready to talk, baby? Let's go. Here's what I've been thinking. I've never heard somebody say this. I went to a sound healer the other day. And so now I'm ready to, ready to, ready to speak on it. You know what, you're right. This is stupid. I, yeah. You know what, you're right. You're welcome. You're welcome. We just had a whole tangent about the dumb friends. And then you were like, hey, I actually can be one of the dumb friends thinking about being dumb right now. Sorry. That was an example of me being toxically masculine. Whatever. So what, what is your thing? No, I'm just, you're going to think, but it's pretty hard. You're going to think, but it's pretty hard. Okay, let's hear it. I won't, I won't make one of it because I'm going to confront the master. I'm going to make fun of you weak little soy boy. Go ahead. No, I think a firm. No, I think okay. I think a firm handshake is kind of toxic masculinity. Yeah, because like, what is it? It's about exerting force. Yeah, it's a little, it's a little like, like you should, like I think, yeah, dude, hey, this is, this is, this is chosen. I think a confident guy just gives you a limp hand. I think that, that, that can be, it's boring. You're saying that in order to, to communicate confidence, I should just give you this. Yeah, because if you do that, it's like, it's like that guy doesn't even care how, he doesn't even want me to think it is, it's like super strong or anything. Like he doesn't, he doesn't even need to show me. He's so like self-assured. And then I came in, I heard his hand a little bit. He even went like, whoa. It's the push pull. Yeah. Anyway, I'll say what? I've been doing something toxically masculine to you lately. And then I don't answer your phone calls. I don't answer calls. Alphas, Alphas make phone calls. They don't answer them. All right. So anytime Tim calls me, I let it go to voicemail. Then I call him right back. And he says something beta like, hello. We also do this thing where we guys should we make like a man's, man's podcast. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. What's the other thing we do? We call each other and neither of us will say a word. And for like a long time, it's like, yeah. For a, it's just like, it's whoever taught it's like, we're in a sales deal. And it's like, whoever says the number first loses. Yeah. And it's been, you know, 15 minutes of us just on the phone doing our normal stuff. I've fully gone to the gym before. Okay. You talk now. I'm like, doesn't say a word. You guys see my traps just hearing this. Can you guys see my Hey, I hope you didn't find this episode because you were looking at Prospera. That sucks for you. Yeah. But I'm a weak soy boys doing things they stay on top. I'm a man and I control the conversation. So anyways, so Sanchez spent his life deep like a person. I'm a game rich. Yeah, that's good. So Sanchez spent his life kind of being a hunt in local Honduran like politics, campaigning for this libertarian dream. Okay. He gets to know God by the name of Porfirio Lobososa, who would have eventually become the president of Honduras. Okay. He gets him and he convinces him to take him on a trip to Miami to meet Paul Romer to design how they could get this theory to come to life. Okay. So they want to do charter cities. Yeah. And so they sit down with the Nobel laureate about the charter city thing. And in 2011, when Lobososa gets elected to president, they pass the RED special development region's law. And essentially what that did is it paved the way for private organizations to buy large plots of lands and then operate as their own city within. Is that what road time is? Uh, no. Well, most of it at least. Are you texting? No, I'm looking up road time. I'm trying to find the Mahogany Bay. You want to see it? Yeah. This is where I went with that cruise line. I'm not allowed to say their name of Disney. Yeah, I went here with Disney. Oh yeah, here we go. There you go. Yeah, pulling an image of Mahogany Bay. It's interesting that those cruise ships, like can I actually dock here because it looks, if you look at the water, it looks very shallow, but it obviously isn't, but it just doesn't look like that should be able to be there. Yeah. And, uh, yeah. See, doesn't it look too big for where it is? And then that whole beach right there is owned by carnival. So this whole thing, that's what I'm saying. This is a charter city itself in a certain way. No? I mean, it's private land, but they don't like run the law because that green pasture up there is like zip lining and four wheelers. Oh, and then that little waterway in the middle, they do some like water. Yeah, water stuff. Yeah. And then they own this whole beach with little restaurants and stuff and shopping stuff. And then like those buildings up there are the port. And that's like where the it was, it was fun, but I got there and I was like, I just feel like I'm in, I'm in a mall. Oh, you know what I mean? Yeah. I was like, I'm just at a mall on the beach. Yeah. I'm not actually in Honduras. Yeah, I thought the same thing. We went to, uh, we went to an all-inclusive and it looks like only one cruise line goes here. I'm pretty sure that that I already say on my set and I think carnival, they own it. Yeah. Yeah. That's okay. I'm not, what are they going to do? Fire me? Yes. They barely know why it exists. It's like right on the other side of the island from the place we're talking about press bearer. Okay. But, uh, yeah, it's actually I'm almost immediately the other side of the island. That's crazy. Um, so I was pretty close. Yeah. So, uh, press bears owned by Palantir or what? Um, so. Uh oh. Listener, there are dark things ahead in this episode. So in 2011, proceed with call. It was 11, uh, they, they, uh, passed this law. And soon after the spring court actually strikes it down because they say, yeah, they say it's unconstitutional because it grants a private entity too much power. Uh, right. Yeah. So, uh, right. But, you know, Sanchez was like, you know, I, I have this job. No, but like you have to do it. It's like gonna happen. Like I have all these letters. You guys understand? I have a Nobel prize. He does have a Nobel Prize. Romer has a Nobel Prize. Oh, I know a guy with a, I get to do it. He wrote a science fiction novel that it seems like he just believes the letters from the letter, the real letters. It's not. I didn't break it up. It's real. Guys, I every night just close my eyes started typing and what was there was there. Yeah. And so he goes and he like heavily campaigns for this, uh, across Congress, uh, the Honduran Congress. And basically they, they are able to figure out a different route for passing this instead of passing it as a law, they are like, while we could push it as a constitutional amendment and we can create zetties, uh, which are zones of economic development and employment. And it's the same concept. Okay. But it's just covered in some different legal ease and pushed forward as an amendment instead of a law. Uh, and so this time in 2013, he gets Congress to vote on it. And it passes kind of wild with 102 out of 128 votes, making it constitutional. And so the spring court now, because it's in the constitution, doesn't really have a way to overturn it. Sweet. And so this opened up a really exciting new opportunity in Honduras. Uh, and a guy by the name of four people of money. Yeah. Yeah. A guy by the name of Eric, um, Brimman, Eric Brimman. This is Eric Brimman. Yeah. Okay. This looks like you wanted to AI and said, give me an evil business guy. Uh, he is a vellis Venezuelan born wealth fund manager. And he nailed it. And he had a dream. And his dream is to create a competitive society where people can lift themselves out of poverty is what he says. And so he works with the which I mean, competitive society where people can lift themselves out of poverty. Squid games. You think about it. And you think about it. Squid games are like, it's a competitive environment that allows you to lift themselves out of poverty. Yeah. So Squid games is kind of a charity. Squid games is actually good. And like, we should make that an amendment to our constitution. So he works with, uh, like a local outreach organization in Honduras, uh, to go to a specific side of this island, crawfish rock. Oh, yeah. And so this is an ancestral village, uh, made up mostly of like black Caribbean people who've been there for five plus generations. Okay. Living in like, uh, mostly raised wood villages. Is it Caribbean? I think it's Caribbean. Is it Caribbean? Caribbean? I don't actually know which one's the correct pronouncement. I think if you're talking about the pirates, it's the Caribbean. But I think everything else is Caribbean. Yeah, I feel like that's right. I thought that's right. Uh, there are two accepted pronunciations. And what are they? Caribbean and Caribbean. So Caribbean? Yeah. And Caribbean. So both of ours are except for Alex. Now you're saying no. You know this whole thing is recording. No, I am. Look at Alex and I was like, no, you're right. He says the way you say it. I say Caribbean. Caribbean. Say it the way you say it. Caribbean. Okay, okay, okay, I thought you were going to gas it. You did shift it a little bit. I don't remember. I remember I did it at the first. You're saying Caribbean. Caribbean. Caribbean. Caribbean. Caribbean. Caribbean. Yeah, I guess it says both are correct. We'll let it go. I just, you know, okay. So crawfish rock. Uh, there's this community that's been here for for generations. Um, and what they do is they come into the community. And I don't think they ever explicitly said it, but they posture themselves like a charity. And so they say they're going to come into the community. They're going to help everybody in the community. They're going to build infrastructure. Okay, they're going to assist everybody in the community. So they go around the community, kind of making all these promises of being like, we're going to help you. And they bring contracts for a bit of a sign, uh, basically like accepting the aid that they're going to bring to the community. And what the contracts were was this is Arlean now, um, which is crazy. So they just tricked them. Yes, yes. And so there's a, there's actually a guardian article where they interviewed a bunch of locals there. And they said, yeah, we were heavily deceived by the way they, yeah, because they communicated as if they were going to help us all. We signed these documents, then we didn't realize we were signing away our, our community. Um, and so it gets swallowed up. Which I'm glad that those are the people who get to be in charge, though, you know, just ethical lighthouses, you know, on the shore of insanity that we find ourselves in. I'm so glad we have people who are pointing a light toward the right direction and stuff. And so they can I share what I thought, what I thought is unethical. What? Um, okay. So look at our handshakes. Unethical. A limp handshake. What a friggin' lib. Um, and so, uh, no. So I was looking up different side hustles, different stuff. I was trying to figure out some different, uh, you know, some money saving things, uh, just church, you know, just for the heck of it. Yeah. So secret shopper.com. Yeah. Let's you secret shopplaces. I was actually like, because someone told you you can get a free oil change on there. I was like, that's interesting. Let me see. And you can, you can go, you can get paid like 15 bucks to go to a, uh, a mechanic. Yeah. And not any, but like they have like, hey, this specific mechanic is hiring a secret shopper, um, $15 plus reimbursement up to 70 bucks. Yeah. So you can go and you can get the oil change. And then you just go back on a secret shopper and you report how the whole experience was, right? Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty great. Then there's an online tab where you can do the same thing for online stores. And one of the things you can do for online stores is, uh, you can sign up for a subscription for two months. And you just audit how the sign up process was. So you're going to take screenshots and just show like, this is how easy it was to find the landing page on their website. Here's how easy it was to sign up, right? So you fill out the whole form. You take the screenshots. You sign up for the subscription because they're going to pay you $25 plus they're going to reimburse you for the cost of two months of subscription. What I realized was I'm pretty sure that the company you sign up for just paid $25 to get you to sign up with the hope that you're going to forget to cancel that subscription because you have to prove that it's going to renew. And I think that they are praying on people who are looking for side hustles online. And they're just like, yeah, you sign up for this. We'll pay you 25 bucks. You just got to prove that you signed up for it. And then we'll give you $25. And I think that they're banking on you forgetting and then getting that also the number of gambling sites that will let you secret shop and they'll reimburse up to $100 a gambling. They'll pay you 20 bucks to sign up for the gambling app that give you $100 back all this stuff. They are praying on people who are looking for online side hustles trying to get them onto their gambling app. That is such a good idea. That was such a smart business. And I just go like, damn, whichever is executive thought of that. His mom is so proud. I'm like happy that you did that. I was I don't know if my thought because we talked about this the other day. I don't know if my thought was more or less cynical than yours. But because I thought when you describe this to me that they were pumping their stock because they could then say they have more users than they actually have if they have a lot of people signing up as secret shop because they would just pay to I mean, the cost of acquisition is $25 in two, three months of subscription. Yeah. And it's like, all right, easy. Let's just $25,000. We can get 1,000 new users on here. Yeah. And I don't know which of those is less ethical. I'm not sure. Yeah. I mean, the gambling one is definitely I don't care about that. No, because like that's how I in that's how I made my money. I became rich when I bought that water supply of a small town in Indiana. And then I just jack the price up because people love water. I don't know why they're like water. It's crazy. How much I can charge for this. They will they will spend just about anything. Oh, what do you mean? What about they're just going to buy bottles of water? No, I outlawed that because you can't as I, hey, you're not going to waste all this plastic. Okay. When there's a good infrastructure of water that you can get from. Yeah. All right. And then I started collecting all the rainwater and I started finding people when they collected rainwater. And like, and this is just my little, my little model train tan that I get to run. Sort of lakes. Did you think about that? Oh, did I think about that? Yeah. I dand them off four miles out of town. So the none of it reaches. So like, there's not like you're going to go can get water. I can go down the river and get some free water. Not in my town. My town. I built a big electrified fence. So you can't even get out. I actually put a bunch of power lines and just exposed them and then like. Yeah. So if you touch it, you get electric. Yes. I feel like I don't touch that. That's shock water. That's shock water. And then I started bottling that and selling that in stores. Shock water. Like water. Oh, again, it tastes electrified. Refreshingly sharp. And so. Oh, water tastes like knives. Cause we're rich now. That's what rich people water tastes like. It does suck. When you've been out of a group of friends, you're at dinner. It's a fancy restaurant. And they always do the things still or sparkling. And then you have one phrase like sparkling. And you're just like, hey, quit pretending. Come on, man. Hey, like, come on. You don't like that. You grew up in Iowa. No one who grew up in Iowa chooses sparkling water, a root beer. Right. Order a root beer. Like we all know you drink. And we see you then. I wish this was root beer. I wish this was root beer. Oh, water. Yeah, I replaced the water supply in the town with those coke freestyle machines. So everyone can put flavors in their water. Duh. What do you want to do? Oh, watered gross. So how long is that? It doesn't seem like something you'd see in a charter city, honestly. So they got swindles, what I'm saying? They got swindled. They came in. They were like, Hey, yeah, that sucks. I feel like you're setting me up, man. And so in December, 29, 2017, they broke ground on Prospera. And they targeted. They targeted this place because it was like a diving destination. If you haven't heard of this area, the Caribbean. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's where the giant blue hole is. The giant blue hole. Yeah. If you're listening, there's a picture on the screen right now of a big blue hole in the ocean. And did an asteroid hit there or something? I must have, right? For a giant crater. It's a sinkhole. It's a sinkhole. Oh, okay. Yeah. And so four hundred and seven feet. And such this is the spot where it just is just this big hole that just what's it look like inside? I don't know ocean. Well, look it up. It's pretty big, I guess. Pictures inside giant hole. What do you Google it over here? How do you find that? So what's really cool is it like it's a sinkhole into what was a cavern. And so there's a bunch of stalactites underwater stalactites in there. Oh, really? It's actually really cool. I'll show you. You're gonna do a bit. No, this is dead serious. I'm being serious. This is dead serious. I would joke about the Earth's big blue hole. Oh, wait, that is sick. Yeah, I'll actually pull up a diagram of it. So you can kind of get an idea of what we're working with here. What we're working with. So people dive. How deep can you dive? Pretty deep, I think. Yeah, but don't you have to come up slow? Yes, you do have to come up slow, and it does depend on the equipment you have. Obviously. Those are not to scale. It's just called the blue hole. Yeah, I mean, it's called the blue hole. I mean, there's all sorts of stuff they swim down there. Wow. So it's just this drop off in the middle of the ocean, and people dive into it. They put a bunch of sharks on the graph, so you know, they're in there. Hey, by the way, there's sharks in there. Oh, here's this is cool actually. This is because it's under this underwater hole. Yeah, there's a spot where you can dive down to the actual like sea level and then come up to the cliff, like the underwater cliff. I don't know what any of the what you just said means. You can go down to the sea level, the sea levels to top. So this is your on the ocean floor, and then there's the cliff right there. Oh, yeah. She's getting ready to jump. Yeah, so this is because you see. Oh, I see, I see. She's right on the rim of the big blue hole, which I want to be honest. The only reason I brought this up is because we went to one of these in New Mexico, because New Mexico has one too. Mexico has the big blue hole, which was just off what highway in New Mexico, which we've talked about this on road trips, like through Kansas, like seeing the world's largest gofer. Yeah, but New Mexico's got the big on a big side. This is a giant hole. It's really exactly what it says, and it's actually super cool. How deep is that one? Uh, this one is, uh, so the main portion of it is 80 feet. And then it's got like some, like little tunnels at the bottom of the veins that go to the big hole. Nothing compared to the big blue hole. But there's no context on the highway signs. Like the highway signs don't say like, they say giant. Just as big blue hole next exit. And so we were like, I mean, we got to go see this. We did not expect it to be filled full of water. Were people swimming in it when you're there? Yeah, also a lot of loose dogs there. Like a lot of stray dogs. A lot of loose dogs. Not someone's dog. They were little stray dogs just all over the big blue hole. Okay. So also another diving destination, but not being taken over by a corporation. Okay. So they chose this place as near the blue hole. Yeah. Because it's a good diving destination. And I'm assuming they've probably vacationed here and they're like, it's a beautiful place. And they were, all right. So is the idea behind what they're trying to do going to be like touristy? No. So the idea is, this is a business paradise. And so this is a place to go. What is that mean? No. I'll show you. So they what kind of customers, so they're like, customers are going to be here. They have giant golf courses. Yes. There's golf courses. And there's kind of like every type of resort you can imagine here. And so there you got this one. That was one person's house. Got this. That was not a resort. Was it? No, I think this is a clubhouse. Oh, okay. I see there's multiple companions. Okay. And then they've got like, but what's the idea? Like what business are you doing business? So the idea is you come here. And when you when you join Prospera, you sign an agreement. It's your club. Kind of, I guess. You sign an agreement. And it's the agreement of coexistence. And essentially what you do is there's going you agree to pay 1% tax on business revenue, 5% tax on wages, 2.5% sales tax, 1% land value tax of any land you own in Prospera. That's all there is in taxes. There's like $135 annual fee to live there. And then you have to commit to your regulations. The way the regulations work though is they have 31 nations you can choose from. And you can be under the regulations of that nation. So these are, this is the nation whose regulations I want to live under or you can submit your own. And everybody just gets to choose what are the regulations I want to live by? Can you change? I don't know if you can change once you commit. I would assume because they're really big on choice. Like you get to choose how you live your life here. Sure. But the other big thing that they did they have an E tier citizen. A class E citizen is what's interesting about this. And so you obviously there's the regular full resident where you I'm a full resident where you live there full time and they have a a class E citizen and a class E citizen. Well actually there's a middle tier. There's a limited resident which allows you to be there for like limited periods of time. And so you pick like okay I'll be here for two months out of the year three months out of the year you're a limited resident. And then there's the E class resident which you don't live there. You live somewhere else but you get to claim that you're a citizen of Prospera and you get to run a business. That's the bigger thing. You get to own a business that operates out of Prospera. So that's your governing body. My cleaning company is based in Prospera Honduras. Let us service you in Glendale, California. And yeah, make all checks payable to Prospera Inc. And so what they did is they made Bitcoin, the legal tender. So they've got this nice cool little. Okay. And they because of the lacks regularly. Who's the on the phone with? I hate whenever you these business rosers like I'll take a picture of me on the phone. Yeah, I'm doing first of all get air pods. You lose her. Oh, I'll tell you what? Here's something toxic with a masculine. Never am I putting a phone up to my face. Never, never. Speaker phone or air pod. Yeah, yeah, this is that holding a phone up on. I can't think of anything more beta than that. This is the dumbest thing. I need two hands in case I get attacked. So we have to do a podcast. Air pods in like this out time. Dude, I got to have both hands ready. What if what if some jump tries to hit on my gal? All right, they don't say gal. My lady, my girl, my girl, yes, what they say. That's how foreign that kind of like we're just us. What if what if some kind of what if some guy say girl, I think they're even more derivative than that? It's on that. I think you're closer to that. Whoa, we should make a manosphere podcast for sure. But for real though, I the putting the talk on the phone. It's like, Hey, my dirty hands are touching this phone all day. I don't watch my hands every time I touch my phone. I don't know what's on my phone. I'm gonna put that thing into my face. Yikes. Yikes. So you think I'm kind of serious a little bit. Is that weird? I mean, it is a little beta though to care what touches your face. I don't think so. I think you're wrong about that one. So it is a little beta. And your voice went up when you said it too. It is a little beta. You care about what touches your face. I don't care what touches my face. Hey, October 22nd, we're doing Tillin Live as part of the Fountain City Comedy Festival here in Kansas City. You go to tillin.com slash live for more information. You get passes. There's going to be more than just us. Oh, yeah. That's like legitimately not an advertisement right now. The festival's pretty sick. Like, there's a really great lineup. A lot of really good comics. This thing's been growing a lot the past couple of years. So really cool to be the part of it. And so hopefully we'll see you there. We're good. Anything can touch my face because I'm confident in it. I think we should try to make a minus your podcast that's like anti-mit. Like, we got to figure out a way to get progressive values to people in a way that sounds like weird jerks digestible for those type of people. It's like, it's like, oh, yeah, it is the thing of like, oh, yeah, you're threatened by a woman. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, a strong, competent woman is threatening to you. Do you remember the triple X church? What? It's the same concept as the triple X church was a big thing in like the late 2000s, really 2010s. Was it this guy that was WWE baptizing people? No, no, it's exactly what it sounds like. But the concept was, it was like a Christian organization that was going into triple X community. So they would go to like adult conferences, adult film conferences and they'd set up booths and they would like meet people there and like try to evangelize like there. Yeah. But they did a lot of stuff that was like, no, honey, I have a ministry trip this weekend. I have to go to a conference. They were like, are they blindfolded? They were like two engaged in the culture. They like did all these things to be like attractional and we're like, we're one of you is like what they did a lot of that stuff, but it was like, they went far enough where it's like, I don't think you're like, help it. I don't think what you're trying to do, you're allowed to do the things you're doing. You know what I'm saying? No. I realized now that in this podcast, I can't explicitly say what I'm talking about, but there was a few things that they did as like promotional stunts that was like, oh, you shouldn't have done that. I think probably way earlier than those promotional stunts are where it should. They shouldn't have had a friend who was like, that's stupid. And then made fun of them and Thanksgiving. That's what I'm saying. Go to your family Thanksgiving. You'll find out what ideas you have that are bad and starting a triple X church is one of them. Anyways, so the idea of this community is that you get to basically choose the laws you provide. And so what has happened is there's about 200 full-time residents living there right now. A lot. A little over 500 companies based out of there. How many E residents? I'm most of those company owners. Okay. And so the things that happen there are a little interesting. Obviously, like, everything is Bitcoin. So like, anywhere where you purchase something, you have to have like, is there still a local population that like is working there? Like, are the workers? So what is interesting is they promise that the local population there was going to be a lot of work for them. And it's kind of a weird tug and pull because like all the construction was local. And a lot of the service jobs are local. And they do and they do pay the people well. And so most people who work for or in Prospera, they make double what they could make anywhere else. And so like they are paid well. But there's also this like there's a weird relationship with the local community, I should say. Well, yeah, they got swindled. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So that's part of it. Yeah. But the things that happen there because this lack of regulation are very strange. One of the big examples that you hear, there is a company that is developing taser knives. And so they do taser knife fights. Taser knives. They're knives that shock you. They're the blade as a taser. Cool. And so they do taser knife fights, which seems not safe. Yeah, I guess I'm not drawing the direct like they make them. Okay. So they do knife, like, no, I don't think that I don't think that's so they do. Well, it's like it's like we've got these here. We've got the community spaces where no one's going to stop us. You want to do a taser knife fight? What's the police like? Do they have police? So they have a private police. But the police is very interesting. They're really just kind of they're more keeping the peace. And so it's like protecting people from like actual physical danger. But when it comes to like the law, like they're not out there enforcing laws. Right. Cause they're like, yeah. So unless you're like, please. Okay. Which which law did you use law? Okay, great. Let me have got to flip through the book and understand what's law. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law. You're the right to an attorney. You can not afford one. One will be appointed to you. See how to stop you right there. I changed my mind. Do you see how easy it is to memorize it? There's nothing on my hand. You think I wrote it down? Memorize the Miranda rights. Quit pulling out a little note card. That's some beta stuff. Nothing's more beta than arresting someone and handcuffing them and then happen to be like pull out your little index card. Yeah. Yeah. Unless you pull it out from behind their ear, that's an alpha move. That is pretty circles back around. Hey, you got your Miranda rights by a year. Are these your Miranda? Nothing is more masculine or alpha than a good magician. Have you seen videos? Have you seen videos of like magicians that like it is a lot of confidence. It is a lot of confidence. Where it's like and then it's like dude. Yeah. You go up to the group of hot girls with the party. Yeah. Pull off a cool card trick. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, you know, but then you have a limp handshake. And then you go, thank you for allowing me to come with it. And they're like, they leave and they're like, okay, first of all, how do they do that? First of all, second of all, he doesn't even care if we think he's strong. He's so masculine. So hot. Him not caring. That was pretty beta. Thanks. Alpha's don't cough. Sorry. They don't sneeze. They don't itch. I was telling him that on the way. I saw a podcast when I was in my weird face. Yeah. I don't know what that means either, but go ahead. I went through a phase where we were kind of like one of these people. We. You were there too. I was present. I was shaking. You were in it. You were in it just as much. I was not in it just as much. If you're going to tell me that you legit listening to podcast and said this. Yeah. Well, I did because I told you all the way. That's where you got the idea to say what you just said. What are you talking about? This podcast. There was this. I don't remember her name as CEO of some company. And she's like, she's like successful people. They suffer. They don't have to sneeze. They hold it. I have to cough. They hold it. Don't attribute that to some woman. If they're face issues, they don't scratch it. Yeah. Because successful people suffer. It's such a crazy concept. That is crazy. And you listen to that on ironically. Yes. Yeah. But I do remember at the time, even when I was in that world, I was like, look where it got you. It didn't. It did. Anyways. So they. And then they do a lot of like the kind of stuff you would expect. And so there is experimental biohacking and non-FTA approved gene therapies and like weird live algae longevity drink companies. It's like all the weird stuff you would think. And then obviously like a ton of crypto companies, ton of gambling companies, like the kind of companies, it would just think of place like this. Just faster. Is it mostly like online stuff? No, it's both. There's a lot of there's a lot of weird scientists. Because they're working in things that like no other nation is going to let them do it. And more importantly, you're going to let them test on humans. Because they can then find people in prosperity and be like, hey, you want to test my cool experimental drug. And people are like, yeah. Because these people are like, uh, do you see that video? Was this real? Was there? Did you see the video of like the billionaire guy who was like, yeah, I did my root canal with no, uh, with no. Oh, like no, like anesthesia. Yeah, anesthesia. What's the numbing? What's the stuff called anesthetic? Yeah. He's like, I did a root canal with no anesthetic. Why? Just to see if you can just a freaking feel pain. Feel something. Just feel something. I don't know. I haven't felt something in years. That's kind of what it seemed like. That is insane. Oh, you guys are, you guys have fully lost it. That is crazy. Um, one of our own, one of our guys, he went, uh, oh, yeah, we love this weird pale guy. I knew that he would be there too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You called him. He looks so weird. He blends in with the sunlight stairs. Uh, if you're not like watching, we're talking about, uh, the wet gecko. Brian Johnson. Brian Johnson. Yeah. I have a poster of him in my room. That's weird. The, uh, the like body or like the longevity guy we did an episode about him. But yeah, he did one of his treatments here. Um, because obviously it was the only place it was legal. And he does, does he do steroids? Probably. I don't know. I don't think so. I mean, he's not, he's not yoked enough. He's not yoked enough to judge to be like, oh, he does steroids. Yeah. Huh. I don't know. He's doing a lot though. So I want to be surprised. His results don't so don't line up. Oh, hold on, go back, go back, go back, go back. I want to point something out. This is Prospera. They do have a fire extinguisher on the wall. So fire code still exists in Prospera. That's interesting. That's I'm not even joking. That's legitimately an interesting little nugget. Is it fire code though? Or did they just say, have we need fire extinguishers? I don't know. Because that is the kind of stuff that like you don't, you think like, oh, you know, there's so much red tape and stopping businesses, but you also don't think through the number of safety regulations that exist because of our government. Like when we see earthquakes in other countries, yeah, and things completely fall apart because there's no regulation on the building the way that there is here. Like that is an example of our infrastructure and our laws working correctly. Yep. Yep. Exactly. And like when you see fire extinguishers and there's a fire safety drill and a, here's what happens if there's a fire. That's good infrastructure. That's good laws. That's good regulations. That literally is the difference between like what we would call first world and third world countries is those regulations that allow you. I mean, there's a lot of other differences, but one of them is those regulations that allow or force companies to not be so regressive and just build something that's dangerous. Yes. Because you see those, you see those towers where they're like sideways and like barely held up like, yeah. And the regulations are what makes that required and not optional. Right. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So keep going. I feel like you are allowed to get to them. We're kind of long on this. So in late 2021, just so tired of hearing you know, made up male voice. In late 21, uh, left wing candidate by the name of Zayamara Castro. Yeah. This is her. She wins the presidency by a landslide. And her whole campaign was I'm a down prosper. Yeah. She's like, she's like, we don't want them here because this whole time, like once prosperous started building and people started seeing what they were doing, they're like, oh, this is basically like colonialism to point out. Yeah. Because this is you came in, you tricked us. Yeah. And now you're taking our land and now the people who get to benefit are us. Yeah. We're not benefiting. Yeah. There's a small population and you like some walls and made it so that this is just your little private thing. Yeah. And they have these, they have the ability to just continue buying land. And so they're buying up more land and soaking it in to prosper to make it a bigger community. Right. And what they are talking about. And like their marketing is they want this to be, uh, they want to be the entire island. Well, they want it to be the Caribbean Hong Kong. They're like, if you think of what Hong Kong is today, in 10 years, we want this to be what this is just full of high rises and free enterprise and all this stuff is the vision that they want. And so obviously to do that, bro, it's not a big island. And so like, they're going to have to take over the whole thing to achieve the dream that they're talking about. Right. And so, uh, there becomes this big political backlash. She wins the presidency in a landslide. And in April 2022, so very early in her presidency, uh, Congress votes unanimously, uh, to repeal the ZD laws. Um, and so in 2024, the Supreme Court declares that the ZDs are unconstitutional and a retroactive effect. And so they repeal law, they say they, they cannot operate the prosperity as anymore. And the community, uh, so like, so this is possible, by the way, the celebration. Oh crap. Ah, I know what that look means. Here's the thing, man. Money's going to win. Yeah. So no, just finish the story here. Let's pretend this is the end. Let's pretend that's how it ended. Oh, no. So they, uh, they had, um, they had put some clauses in their contracts with Honduras that, uh, that they then put into effect there. So there was a couple. One of them was a claw that, uh, there's a 10-year sunset clause to any ZD law. And so any, uh, change in Honduran government, they had to give Prospera 10 years to sunset the law, um, before they could just repeal it. And so even though they repealed it, there's now a 10-year timeline before it's gonna actually go away is what this law or what this, uh, lie in the contract stated. Second, um, there was, uh, bilateral and that is also, man, no, I can't do it. I'm not gonna crash out. Ah, that's I'm gonna have to. So they, that's this kind of stuff that's like, okay, well, we'll just, just vote different. And you're like, you don't understand that when the people who were in charge made those decisions and did those things, they intentionally made it so that it stuck in a way that even after they're gone, you can't undo their work. Yeah. Yeah. It's impossible because that 10-year sunset clause is going to last through a couple terms. And so new people will be empowered. That will be friendly to them. They will, they will lobby to get the right people in elected. That will then be friendly to them. So in 10 years, they can stay. But it doesn't even matter because they went immediately after this, this, this contract was signed with Honduras to allow Prospera. Uh, they went and they made investment treaties with Kuwait and the United States, um, through trade agreements. And these agreements are 50-year agreements. And so because of that, this is an agreement between Honduras, Prospera, Kuwait and the United States that are 50-year time spam. And repealing this is repealing an agreement it has made internationally with two large powers. Right. That Honduras is beholden to. And even bigger than that. They then went through the ICSID, which is the international center for settlement of investment disputes, which is a World Bank organization. Okay. Honduras being a member of the World Bank is, again, beholden to this organization. And essentially what this does is for international organizations to be able to have a court of law where they can sell disputes in is what this exists for. And so through this, they are able, because a lot, uh, according to the World Bank is a little different than a lot of other laws. It allows you in a dispute like this to sue for not only the loss, uh, that is a part of the actual suit itself, but potential losses. Yeah. Potential profits. Laws, so they went and they sued the Republic of Honduras for 10.7 billion which is two thirds of the entire annual budget of Honduras. And so, uh, by the end of 2024, uh, the Hondurian government, uh, they settle the lawsuit and they peel back on the change and they allow press bearer to stay, uh, because they just got kind of bullied by these ultra-witch people who had the money. Uh, speaking of ultra-witch people, this was, uh, pushed forward the, the, or I don't know if I should say organization, but, uh, one of the large, um, Peter Teal campaigners who who lay a lot of the groundwork in Honduras who did a lot of campaign before it, uh, Roger Stone. Oh, even better. The most cartoon villain looking guy. You got a picture of him? I don't have the picture of Roger Stone. If you don't know who Roger Stone is, he is, I think a bad guy in the powder puff girls. He does, he does look like a bad guy. Go watch a documentary about Roger Stone and then just think about how insane it is that any politician, yeah, yeah, I can't crash out about that. Holy cow. I mean, oh, that I'll get you a picture of Roger. This guy is, go watch his deposition. Oh my gosh, man, he's like where he's like gritting his teeth like he just, he does oozes evil all the time. He oozes evil. He's, he's in fact gritting his teeth on this picture. Look at, that's what dude. Look at him. Look at him. His teeth are sharpened. What's he sharpening his teeth on? Oh, godly, dude. Him and that fat guy that got in trouble this year. You know, I'm talking about the cartoon fat guy that got in trouble this year. What are you talking about? The, what's he do for it? You know, the, the, well, I'll find him later. He looks like a villain as well. The, it's so crazy that we are being ruled by Batman villains. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but yeah, I guess, at least Brian Johnson looks like, you know, if this is pulling up, pull up, pull up Roger Stone real quick. This is your dad's Batman villain. Pull up, Brian Johnson. This is millennial Batman villain. Do you see the difference? At least he's not. Yeah. Like your T.O. Brian Johnson, this whole thing like Zuckerberg. Yeah. Like they at least have been doing jujitsu and stuff. All right. They're trying to pull up Roger Stone. This guy's opening car doors backwards and kicking puppies out. This guy is chasing down Dalmatians. You understand? Like it's a different kind of evil bad guy that we're fighting. It's true. It's true. Yeah. Um, anyway, got a little bird nose. I hate him. Get him out of here. Oh my gosh. No, but the, the investors in Prospera, it's probably good to go through. It's a good group. There's Tim Draper, who was a venture capitalist who invested in Tesla and SpaceX. Of course. Brian Armstrong, CEO of Coinbase. Mark Andreessen. Andreessen. And then we got a couple good ones here. Sam Altman and Peter Teele. Yeah. So it's a good group of people invested in this. I think Peter Teele hisses at servers and restaurants is what that joke was. I think I made that joke in a couple episodes ago. So just don't think that joke was not that he hisses in people's restaurants. The joke was he's in the bushes. He's in the bushes rustling around. And you're like, wait, are we defense contractors? Then he's like, you know, is that Peter Teele? But I think he probably does hiss it. No, he doesn't have service in restaurants. He has freaking his people go get it. Go, they probably buy a restaurant. He goes in, eats there, then they close it. Yeah, yeah, for sure. So private equity does. They go, all right. Um, but here's the crazy thing. Like so Prospera, their goal is to build this into a Hong Kong line community. So they're going to try and take over that whole island is definitely what's going to happen. They pull back up pull back the one section of the island they can't take. You're going to have to prime ahogany bay from my cold dead carnival hands. Do you understand? Do you understand? I can't wait to kick Roderstone into the carnival smoke stack, right? But there is a pretty big movement among this community of people to do a lot of these. And there's a growing movement. Yeah. In the United States, they want to do in National Parkland. That's what the goal is with the National Parkland is to build these communities, which is scary. So another encouraging episode of things I learned last night. Oh, godly, dude. I feel like my eyes about to pop out. Yeah, it is. That Celsius is hitting me wrong right now. There's hitting me in the wrong way. That's hitting me wrong right now. Oh, it's hitting me sideways. Oh, but yeah, so Sanchez, they gave Sanchez this award. Well, now let me read the let me read the text. I really wasn't reading the text earlier. So Liberty Acceleration Award, that sucks. For architect legal foundations for new models of governance and economic freedom. And so that guy in the middle is this guy. Yeah, they gave him an award. Dude, for coming up with how to make this. And look at the left. Look at the sign on the left. I don't know if you can read what that says. Cripto cities. Yeah, yeah, pretty rough. Pretty rough. Ah, Sam Beckman Fried was a big proponent of this. This place sucks. So yeah, pretty cool. Well, how do we get out of it? That's terrible. Yeah, I don't know. He really looks so bad. And you know what's crazy is that he probably Googles himself. He might see this. Roger Stone, if you see this, crawl back into your cave. Go back into your little old you came out of. Go back to where you came. Yeah. There's your shall remain. All right, till you are complete a game. That's how he says a game. That was incantation to keep you away from us. We need to we need to get those like that. Whatever that smoke stuff is. Are you doing? Are you doing a you were doing a ball of cauldron? I'm doing a witch's blow. I'm sorry about a guy. What's that called sage? Yeah, yeah, we just sage. Well, the same thing. There we go. Now tell me about that. Okay. Hey, if you like this episode, and you want kind of similar, this is what Walt Disney was trying to do with Epcot. And we did a whole episode about it. And so you can find out what Walt's crazy dream was. And then also how his brother was the one to be like, Hey, yeah, thanksgiving. His brother was like, you're stupid. So don't do this. And then his brother killed him. And then his brother killed him. Anyway, his brother kicked him into the giant blue hole. Okay. So we also have a Patreon. And we're not going to pitch that right now, because this episode was bad, right? You don't want more of this. But if you do, we'll see you over on Patreon. And as always, we'll see you next week because we like that you're here and we like that we do this. So next week's episode is way more encouraging. What's it about, Tim? Alright, I'll find out with you guys.


Have you ever wondered what would happen if a group of the world’s richest tech billionaires decided to build their own private city with their own private laws, tricked an ancestral village out of their land to do it, and then sued the entire nation of Honduras for two-thirds of its national budget when things went south? Well, buckle up. … Read More

This Man Forgot His Own Name For 11 Years | Benjaman Kyle

09-08-26

Episode Transcription

Hey, man, I'm happy to be here. Have you ever heard of Benjamin Kyle? Benjamin Kyle. Benjamin Kyle, and it's important for you to know this is himself. Okay. Benjamin Kyle looks like a financial advisor in a small town. The craziest description that is so accurate. It's so accurate. Yeah. He looks like a small town financial advisor. He's got Tim's hairline. It's pretty far back there. Oh my God. Not even close. Well, there's a glare. I can't really tell. You know, we got another picture of him. Yeah, it is like you're hairline. That also has a glare. It would have another picture of the glairiest of glares. And I like these guys smiling a little bit at this one. Like he looks like he just, he looks like he just got away with something. You know what I mean? I went like this and then you go to this one where he's very much not. Are you my mom? A lot of people. No. Hey, this is me auditioning to like read children's book. No. I'm not you, mom. And then he continued off. I think wacky inflatable arm guy. I got a car dealership. My mom. Are you my mom? Things I learned last night. OK, so the first two pictures, the same shirt. Pull up the second one. This one, do a family barbecue or something. He's just eating bell peppers, the same thing, same shirt, that's the same shirt. Yeah, look, this one, he looks like he just pulled off an inside joke on somebody. And it's over to you. Yeah, I got him, dude. I got him. I got him. I'm never going to buy mint cakes. And why so many pictures of this guy? He just like the photos he's got. He's a very nice guy. He's wearing the breasts. Reading the paper. He's in a Pepsi pole. Playing in a field. Reading the paper. OK, who is this guy? This is Benjamin Kyle. Yeah, you said that a part of that. It's spelled. This is important. B-E-N-J-A-N-A-N. So Benjamin. Benjamin. Not Benjamin. OK. And Benjamin Kyle, here's the thing about Benjamin Kyle. OK. He was, was that where you were laughing so hard about with the bell pepper picture? You were like, I'm going to drop that in. Well, I was laughing. I was laughing at the newspaper. The newspaper picture kills me. This newspaper picture is so funny. Because he's just like literally all of these pictures, though, like just in sequential order, again, all of these pictures are so funny to me every single one. He's got like the Mr. Fini mustache. And geez, man. OK, this is Benjamin Kyle. Crazy. I guess 31st 2004. Burger King employee reports for work at 5 a.m. and discovers this man, lying naked behind the dumpsters, covered in blood, beaten, described as covered in fire amp bites, too. OK. No ID, obviously, he's but naked. He's unconscious. And so she, of course, calls 911 and says, hey, there's a guy badly beaten and attacked by a fire dance and naked without ID behind my Burger King dumpster. And so they come, they pick him up. They take him to the hospital. And he was also severely sunburned. It's like he'd been there the whole day before. And no one noticed or something. I don't know. And he also had cataracts. The doctors checked him out after his thick. He has pretty severe cataracts. And so they took him in. He's completely knocked out, like in a coma. And they're nursing him back to health. But the problem was they already had a John Doe in that hospital. And so they couldn't call him John Doe. And so they're trying to come up with another name. And they're like, Benjamin. They were like, well, we found him at Burger King. So he could be BK Doe. And so he, in and out of consciousness, is hearing everyone call him BK. And so as he starts to come back, he starts to come back. Call me BTK. What is BTK? Google it. It's a fun reveal for Tim right now. Are the BTK killer? Yes. It's BTK. It's BTK. You're missing the T. You're missing the T. No. So he starts coming back too. And they're like, hey, what's your name? And he's like, you call me BK. And they're like, no, I know what we call you. But what is your name? And he's like, I think it's BK. And they're like, no, no, we get it. And so he keeps like, every time they're asking, he's like, be it's BK. And long story short, discovered he's got severe amnesia. He remembers nothing from before that he was picked up. OK. And so when asked what his name is, he just decides. He's like, I'm pretty confident my name starts to be. And I feel really good about Benjamin. I'm pretty sure it's Benjamin. And they're like, OK, so B-E-N-J-E-M. J-A-M. Yeah. B-E-N-J-A-M-I-N-J-N-O. Hold on. I think there's an A there. And there's an A there. Like, yeah, we just did that. No. J-A-N-Y-S, correct? Yes. A-N. And they're like, oh, Benjamin. And he's like, he's Benjamin. I do have a head injury. And they're like, OK, what's your last name? And he says it's a K. It's got to be a K name. Knife. No, it's not Knife. Definitely not Knife. Knife. Killer. Killer. No, it's not killer. Kile. Kile. Yeah, there you go. And so he tells him it's Benjamin Kile. And so they release him as Benjamin Kile. That's crazy. Severe cataracts. And this is the NIS in 90s? 2004. It's way too late to be releasing people back in the wild. OK, OK. We'll see you later. This is Richard Hill, Georgia, just outside Savannah. So he's in a Savannah, Georgia hospital. Well, I say, I say, what is your name? It's exactly what they said. And he goes, uh, Ben, Ben, Ben. I don't understand where you just said. Your name is Benjamin. Can you say that in an American accent, please? Can you, please? Your, your knife, your name, your name in English. That's another accent, a deep South accent. Try to do a not deep South accent. Oh, your name is, it's pretty good town, actually. And if you're casting for anything, and you would like to put me in that, I would, I would, I would, I would, I would probably turn it down, but it'd be fun to be fun to like kind of pretend. It'd be fun to do the back and forth. Like, oh, yeah, let me see this clip, you know? I want to be able to tell. But I also just want to raise my value, you know? Yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm talking to this movie about, you know, the character, he's like a southerner, but like he pretends he's not. We're watching the burrows, yeah, finally, and, uh, the cop, the young cop, uh, Reagan goes, Al read for this. Really? What do you mean? Because yeah, I did, I did this scene with him for his audition. That's crazy. Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of stuff. Did she know that it was for that? No, I mean, like, there's a lot of stuff that, like, Reagan's auditioned for in the past, like, and then we'll see the scene in a Netflix show. And then I'm like, oh, I read the mother's lines for this. Oh, that's interesting. And when I, I'll tell you what, I was, I would help my wife with her self tapes, and she's on camera. I'm in the back. And I was like, I'm going to get this role. Cause I'm killing it over here. I'm out here. I'm like, Netflix, listen, you can't, you can't do this. The trees. You know? And I was, I'm going to get the, I'm going to get this. Okay. So they released it back in the wild. He remembers nothing. He has no money, no social security number, no, he's no like, I work at burger. He's like, I do think I work at Burger King. And so they give him, I think they gave him clothes. I'm assuming they gave him clothes when he left the show can give him clothes. My assumption is they let him leave clothes. But he let, he leaves because they were like, well, you don't have any money, so we can't like really fix all your problems. We just make sure you're not going to die. And then you're back on your own, man. Oh, my God. Maybe. And so he goes back on his no social security number, no social security number, he goes where? He just goes out to the streets. And so he, he tries to go to shelters, but even shelters would have taken, cause he doesn't have, I live here. I think this is my home. He tries to go to shelters, but shelters wouldn't even take him, cause he has no social security number. And so he ends up finding a charity that says, hey, we'll pay for your cataract surgery. And so he, a couple months later, he gets his cataract surgery and he's like, at least that's something like, we're not going to do anything about your living situation, but we will take care of that. We'll help you see. And so he gets his cataract surgery and he comes to you and they're like, well, we would keep you here, but you know, you can't pay for it. So you're going to have to go back on the streets, bandage your eyes up and stuff. You can't see anything for a couple days. And so finally, he's just a homeless guy now. Yeah, he's just homeless. And so they take his bandages off and he can see in the mirror, finally, he looks to tell the mirror and he goes, Oh, Steven, what are you doing? He's talking. I'm Bruce Willis. Oh, I've been Bruce Willis this whole time. You guys go down to the office and your police station be like, hi, I'd like to turn myself in. I'm Bruce Willis. And they're like, what, no, I know that I know the actors and the actors are Bruce Willis. No, I guess his name is also Bruce Willis. Yeah, we both have been named Bruce Willis. But my name is Bruce Willis and I've been committing a bunch of crimes in the past because I knew because I name Bruce Willis, don't believe it. My name is he's got a fix on the accent, but he couldn't understand it before. And I am, I am a criminal, no, is that Ghana where you're looking for this guy? You just, you let me know, let me know in the comments, like I can do to, you know, get this suit. Better suit your role and just me, just me, just me, just me, just me, just me, just me, just me, just me, just me. I'm trying to get cast and something. Pretty funny to do TikToks like that, but it's just audition tapes, but you're talking to the audience. Yeah. How was that? Was that good? Was that good? Leave in the comments below if you think that was good. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's crazier things have happened, I mean, people have gotten cast from things online. That is true. You got to be hot, but it works out. Hot people, it just kind of happens for, you know? Yeah, you got the boat talks, though, so that you're halfway there. That's why I'm doing this. So I'm trying to eat it, you know? Jared Myers, I am 63, I live in Glendale. Now, I do say, my name might be Benjamin Kyle, but I think it also might be Bruce Willis. Can you, can you give me it, otherwise, but a little bit more confused when you say Bruce Willis, but I think it also might be Bruce Willis. Good, right? That's really good. That's really good. I mean, don't want to dive, but we get to Bruce Willis. I'm slipping into a little bit of a Walton guy, a Walton guy, but I'm fine with that. Yeah, I'm okay with that. Yeah. Do it again, but this time you're John Madden. Yeah, so I just got to talk normal. That's what I was going for. I sound like that. So I was, you know, so I'm, I'm Benjamin Kyle, but I'm also like, yeah, I circle here and I'm, I'm Bruce Willis. I'm Bruce Willis. Yeah. I'm Bruce Willis. I'm actually really, I'm really mad. I'm really upset. I'm personally offended that Nick Cage got cast as John Madden over me. I'm like legitimately annoyed because I could have worked on it. All right. I mean, it's halfway there already. As it is. I am for sure. I am for sure a young John Madden. You know what I'm saying? Like an ape. I give a little bit of that kind of thing right there that kind of starts to feel, that feels close enough. You know, yeah. Yeah. And so like, you know, you know, you know, how it is. I can just, you know, you know. And boom. And boom. I could, I could have worked on it. I could have got that for sure. For sure. So Hollywood. Yeah. And instead they, they, they body modified what's his face. They after marketed Nick Cage, they body. And he looks so dumb. Pull up an image of Nick Cage, pull up the one where he's walking out of the tunnel. That's what I want to show. All right. Let's just pull him up real quick so you can see what I'm talking about. Yeah. Look at him. He looks like Uncle Rico melting. You know what I'm saying? Like he just, he doesn't look like, he doesn't look like him at all. Yeah, it doesn't look like John Madden. It's single bit. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it is. It's pretty sad. I'll tell you what. I would have fully committed to this, too. I would never, God, would never get on an airplane again. You know, John Madden had a blast to go to the bus everywhere, but that's so inefficient. So inefficient. So inefficient, but pretty cool, but pretty cool. It is a little cool, but you know, anyways, where was I? I would have put on weight for that. I would have gained 50 pounds. Yeah. And I would have done it for the craft, not just out of laziness, like I've previously done it. I would have had a point. I would have overeaten for something instead of to run away from my emotions. That's the dream scenario there, isn't it? You just said dream. What gave you up? All right. So he's back in the world. He gets his cataracts. He looks crazy. He looks in the mirror. And does everything come back? Yeah. Here's the crazy thing. Okay. So I haven't mentioned yet. He remembers 23 specific memories. Okay. And these memories are... Has he writing them down? He's just like, I can't remember. Well, over the years, people have cataloged them the memories on the shares. I don't know if he's writing them down, but he does remember he was born. Let me get this date. He remembers he was born specifically on August 29th, 1948. And the reason he remembers that is because it's 10 years to the day before Michael Jackson was born. So he remembers that. And then he remembers very... I don't remember that guy's name. Now, I say, I do not recall this guy's name, but he's the one who walks forward and back. What at the same time? Yeah. The hat. The yee hee. And I remember in... He's part of the... He's... My family didn't like him. My family didn't much care for him because they didn't like his music. But he would walk forward and backward at the same time. I'm 10 years older than that guy. All of his memories are someone walking backwards. Every single memory he has. It really is... It really is like... He remembers the same way you remember your early childhood where you remember these really weird peculiar scenes. I remember that... Like, for sure. I remember that I'm 10 years older than... Michael Jackson. What? What? What? What? You just said you're a singer. I don't know who Michael Jackson is. I don't know who Michael Jackson is. No, but I don't know. I don't know who you're talking. So... And then... And then... And then everything else... It was an interesting story and I'm making it really bad. Everything else he remembers is just random little things like the same way you remember things from when you were like a young kid where he's like, I remember going in the movies with my friend and the guy gave us free tickets because he wanted to help us or he's like, I remember taking the bus and he's like, I'm pretty sure it was in Denver and my... He's remembering these really weird flashbacks. Flashbacks scenarios. Do we think the memory loss is because of how bad he was beating behind this Burger King? Well, we'll come back to that. The last thing he remembers though is 1979. And so he has this mental map of himself. That's like a 30-year-old man. Okay. So he gets his cataracts and he takes off his bandages and he looks in the mirror and he sees himself. And it's... It's a jump scare for him. He's like, who is that man? Who's that old guy? Okay. Because his sense of self is 30 years younger than that. Sure. And so he's shocked to see it and find out how old he really is. And so he kind of goes through this mental... I guess trauma of the scenario of not being able to remember who he is. And he ends up getting put into a mental behavioral health facility. Okay. And he gets out for a little bit. Eventually gets out. And when he gets let out, he connects with a woman by the name of... Catherine... Doesn't matter. Catherine. Gross. He connects with this woman by Catherine who is one of the workers at the behavioral health facility. Knows he has nowhere to go. Okay. Has compassion for him and says, you can come stay with me. You can live in my house. Yeah, you can come live at my house. Hey. Hey. Hey, you can come live in my house. Because she knows he's Bruce Willis. Hey. She thinks he knows this is Bruce Willis the actor. So she's like, hey. I'm going to stay in my house. Catherine Slater. And so Catherine Slater is like, I'm going to... And she kind of becomes obsessed. She's like, we're going to find out your story. And so they, she goes to work. He stays there. He doesn't have a social security number. He can't get a job. He can't even get Medicare. He can't get food stamps. He can't do anything on his own. Yeah. Because he doesn't have... He doesn't exist as far as the government's... Like he's legally a ghost. Right. And so she is like... She goes to work. She comes home. And she and him use the internet to try to figure out who he is. This is now like 2006, 2007. Okay. And they're trying to piece things together. And they're making like... I don't want to say progress. Because that's not really the word I would use in this scenario. But they are like covering some ground. Are they having like forums being like, do you know this guy? Kind of. They go on Reddit. And he does this Reddit post. And he puts a picture of him up on Reddit. And he's like, he's like, do you know who I am? Because I don't. And then it's just this whole thread of people... Like trying to figure out who he is and then sharing his image around. And he's sharing all of the memories he has, hoping somebody else sees it that it jogs their memory. And they can remember it. Okay. And eventually, this gets the attention of some people who are like, Hey, I think... Like I know some of the producers on Dr. Phil. I knew Dr. Phil's here. I knew you were gonna say Dr. Phil. Gosh dang it. And so he gets... What's that? He gets featured on a Dr. Phil episode. Yeah. And they bring in one of their producers that Dr. Phil had for like 10 years was a former FBI agent and his whole job. We're here to... I get Dr. Phil's voice down. Hold on. Well, he's older by the time... By the time that I was watching Dr. Phil. Because you and my wife and I went to a Dr. Phil taping. I do know that. You looked pretty frail when we saw him. Today, we're here. That was... Yeah, it's a little bit more nasal. A little bit naked. Yeah. Today we're looking for... It actually is on... Genuinely, it is John Madden, nasally and not as excited. Yeah. You're not stumbling. He's very like... Today, we're looking for, you know... Well... And he's got his clipboard. He sits like this. Dumb. His hands on top of his clip are all the time. Pull up a Dr. Phil in between with it. He's just on top of his... Now... Today, we're trying to find... This man says that he can't remember anything about his light, you know... Anyway, we were fans of Dr. Phil for a while. Then he got weird. Yeah, Dr. Phil... Prime time Dr. Phil was... Was a great shell. Hold on, hold on. She found what I was looking for. It's kind of great. We're doing how often he just does his hands on top of his clipboard like this. It's kind of like... Hey man, just like... Quit sitting... Dead on you were with this. He's like... Yeah. He found this control position and then just lived with it for a while. Yeah, just committed. Yeah. I... But I'm saying it. His hands were always on top of this thing. He's just being like... Yeah. That's crazy how accurate that was. And this is him... That episode is him trying to get this guy to quit pretending to be in a wheelchair. He's like, hey, stand up. He's stand up. I know you're faking it. I know you're not... Now you're not going to come on my show. You're not going to come on my show and lie to me. Now, I have many years working with the FBI. He always said that. He always like... Yeah, so he has... Dr. Phil's staff has a former FBI agent and his whole job is cases like this. Yeah. The FBI agent spent weeks trying to track this guy down, pulling every connection he knew. And one of the things they did is they did this age regression test. And so, they're like, this is what he looks like now. This is what he would have looked like when he was 40. This is what he would have looked like when he was 30. And they're like, does anybody recognize him from before he... Like, back when he was... Right, before he got old and I... Before he fell apart. Does he... Do noses do this? Do what? Look how his nose is so much lower. And then... I mean, I will say, like, your cartilage is the one thing that never stops growing. Like, your ears and your nose does just continue to grow. Yeah. And so, like, I guess your nose could droop a little. I guess it's possible. Where are our noses look the same? I don't know. Do a side by side. Robert, go look at our earliest videos. Side by side are noses. And see if they changed. Do we... Are our noses bigger? Are our ears bigger? My ears have always been very small. How big my nose gonna get? I mean, it'll get bigger. Maybe you could get a nose job too. Finally, your ears will grow into your head. One day by... You've had tiny little ears this whole time. But this does create a media circuit for him. He goes on... Yeah. And I had no idea that Jeff Probst had a daytime talk show. But he goes on Jeff Probst show. Who's Jeff Probst? The host of Survivor. Oh, that's all... Oh, yeah. And so, and he does a whole circuit of this. Media... Like, a major national television... He's like, I already know who I am. Yeah, and that's the whole bit. He's like, I don't know who I am. Does anybody know who I am? And what's crazy about it is nobody comes forward. Literally no one is like, yeah, I know that guy. Everything must go. Tillin's going out of business and saw our Patreon. It is now 6.99 for all success. People will freak out. They don't know we're joking. Tillin is not going out of business. That was a joke. But we are reducing the price of Patreon to $6.99 for all tears. You get every perk. You get access to Discord. You get access to every episode. See? You hype it that much. Oh my gosh. It is high. I know, but when you talk like that, it seems like we're really selling. I was trying to do a word selling bit. You know? I don't know. I'm a sleazy salesman. I want to make it... I straight up think that we've been doing that bit too long. That people are like, it's a little... This is the first time I've ever done the bit before. I was a sleazy salesman. No, we didn't. It was the whole way. Before I was Tuesday. Tuesday, Tuesday. We did those bits. Just leave it all in. Do this whole thing. Join us on Patreon. And even crazier, all of these different media outlets that he goes on, they all did their own independent investigations. Wait. And no one can find them. I... You were on Dr. Phil West. I recognized you from Dr. Phil West. No, I know. No, that's a whole... I remember that. I remember that. I remember that part. I don't remember the 30 years from 79 to 2004. Over your head. Over your head. You're so dumb one over here. I'll wait for you to finish your drink. Thanks. Yeah, we got to get to a clipboard. I think we actually have clipboards in the case over there. So this becomes like a pretty big thing. And like the cultural zeitgeist. They're going to have to wear a Florida State University student for his capsule. This is 2005 now, right? Well, this is much lighter. So now like they did the whole media thing in like 2007. Oh, okay. He got found in 2004, goes through the behavioral health system for a couple of years. Gets out in 2005. Okay. Lies with Catherine for a few years. And that's when he does the media circus or circuit. And then this is all... And they can't just DNA test them. That's strange. And so he... There's an FSU student, a film student at Florida State University, who calls you... And it's like, I want to do a documentary on you. And he convinces him to move to Florida to do this documentary. And so this is a kid by the name of... Wrong tab, hold on. Mr. Beast. And... First thing he did, a lot of people don't know that. He started as a serious documentary. I say this a lot about documentaries, is that somewhere in the world right now, I'm stalling to give you time to look at this. I got it. Somewhere in the world right now, there are people with their little cameras, following the most insane person you've ever thought of. And in a couple of years. And like we don't know that for a couple of years. Yeah. You know? And a couple of years. Like the Tiger King. They were following that Tiger King guys. And I've said this on a podcast before. Yeah. As they were recording that wrong number lady. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that's true. That's true. And like, there's something crazy. Someone out there is setting up the thing. They're put on the mic. And they're doing the whole like, yeah, I'm actually the most absurd person you can even imagine. So in 2011, this kid, John Wickstrom is his name. Chris Capstone project. This is him. He calls... He calls Benjamin. And he's like, hey, come out to Florida. I want to film the documentary for you. And so he films it for his school project. And basically gets a chance to tell. Benjamin gets a chance to tell his whole story. And John... My mom is what it's called. And it's a montage of Benjamin walking around town, walking up to like a little bulldozer, like a little thing. Are you my mom? A lot of people... No. Hey, this is me auditioning to like read children's books. No. I'm not. You were mom. And then he continued on. To go to... He walks up to the wacky inflatable arm guy. And a car dealership. You're my mom. Are you my mom? No. No. No. No. No. They do not believe in the police terms. They don't believe in that. The idea that the wacky inflatable arm guys are being tortured. They don't like it. They don't like it. And they can't get into stock. Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- Don't- I like that a lot. There's this smile is painted on. That's really funny. Don't- Don't die. That's funny. Don't do that yet, thank you. That's funny. That's my abs hurt. That's a good one. Yeah, so John is like, I'm going to solve this. Yeah. And so he starts making the documentary, but what's interesting is he tells later stories about the process of making this documentary and he said it was really interesting because we would make progress on something and then he was like Benjamin would sort of get in the way. Sabotage it. Yeah, stop us from being able to pull on that thread. And so he's like, so we kind of put out the documentary. It was just kind of like, this guy doesn't know who he is and we don't either. But I was like, where we landed and he's like, I had a deadline. It was for school. And so like, we kind of just had to leave it at like, yeah, this guy's no idea who he is and we don't know either. And the reason we don't know is kind of because he didn't seem like he didn't want us to know. And so this attracts the attention of some actual documentarians. Yeah. Some ones are like, alright, alright. It's OK. Why don't you get out of the way? Let us make a film. Let us make the movie. OK. Let us make a film. Hey, yeah, my dis. How about this. All right. You go back to class. Are you going to go back to school? The book? The book? The book? The book. 都有一 Per Second pencils and racers and whatever. Other kids' school stuff. and let us make a good proper document. So I have my dad, little kid. So it was like, okay. Well, yeah. Okay. So people who make documentaries kind of are scum. It's this organization called Hot Snakes, which sounds insane. Hot Snakes. Hot Snake. Which. Okay. I don't like that. These two. This is Eric. I don't like it. And even more. Now that I've seen them because he look, okay. So she looks a little bit like Katy Perry. And he looks like a Twilliquist doll. Yeah. This is their Hot Snakes media, Hot Snakes media. And uh, okay. Eric and Shannon of Angelista, um, evangelista, evangelista, uh, Eric spent 14 years as a broadcast news and newspaper journalist and Shannon worked for, uh, the Fed, uh, all right. Cool. And so they were like, Hey, we could take our two unique sets of skills and make good documentaries. So they started making documentaries for an investigation discovery. Um, okay. So they had like more funding. Yeah. Yeah. So they approached Benjamin and they were like, Hey, we can, in 2014, like, Hey, we have the resources to figure this out. And like, we're going to go long haul and we're going to figure this out with you. Cool. And so it's like, that would be awesome. And he's, they were like, one thing we noticed is you have a lot of memories from Colorado, like if you're 23 memories, the majority of them are out there in Colorado. And they're like, have you ever been, he's like, it's Colorado. And, and he's like, you should know this, dude. It's Colorado. Anybody from Colorado calls it Colorado. People from outside, they say it, like, they say it, like they're throwing up, they say it like they're actively throwing up Colorado, like that, I genuinely gag as that's coming out. My, I can feel my tongue. Colorado. Yeah. Gross. It's so gross. How you grew up? So cool. And now you live here. I, I think about it every day. And, and it crushes the thought, like comes in. It starts up here in my brain and you're like, well, I'm like, I'll put you down. I'm so much weight. Now I live in blue springs. You can feel the weight just push through me and into my chest. Yeah. And it just feels suffocating. Yeah. So just, and that's the housing market. Yeah. That's, that's that. So the Evangelistas are like, hey, we've got the resources. Let's go take you to Denver. So you can see all these places in Colorado that you have these memories about. And so you guys heard it, right? What? He just said Colorado. I said, I still know what you're talking about. Say it. Call the rato. That's how I say it. That's how I've always said it. And every single time I've said Colorado, I say Colorado. Okay. And they, they explored the city to give them a chance to kind of go through. And there's video footage of him walking around the streets and be like, oh, I remember this place. I recognize this. He's like, it's like this place just opened like, I remember this. And I'm like, yeah, I was founded two years ago and he's like, yeah, it's, yeah, but I remember, I remember it before though, too, I think they had it and then they closed it. And now they just reopened it. Yeah. No, but it's interesting watching them because like throughout the whole, I watched the, it's a four part documentary. I watched the whole thing. And throughout the whole documentary and the early part of it is like, he can't remember anything. He's super foggy. They get him to Colorado. And he's going around. He is like, oh, yeah, turn left here. This is Colfax. And like, he's like clearly remembering the city very well. And he's like, oh, right up here, there's, there's a taco place. It's, it's Casupanita. And then they show Casupanita, he's like clearly remembering things very well now that he's there. Yeah. And then they take him up the boulder because they're like, he's like, he's like, I do one of his memories was at University, Colorado, so they take him there, they take him to the library. He gets the library. The library is weird. He doesn't remember the library. And then they go to the mountains here. Members read rocks. They go along this mountain pass. And he's like, he's like, yeah, a lot of the, he's like locals, we drive those all the time. People from out of town, they get freaked out. We call it the Oh, no road because that's what people from out of town say when they're on this road. Yeah. If they get out of the car and he's like, oh, pull over here, pull over here. And they pull off on this, just like this side road in the mountains and they come up and they pull over. And there's this cliff. There's this big drop off. I actually have a photo from this part in the documentary and he stops and he looks over this drop off. Here's my buddy's down there. And he looks back at the camera and he says, he says, I don't remember this at all. Pull over here, pull over here. Yeah, he's just treasin' this it. Yeah. I don't remember this at all. I don't remember this. No, he looks, he points out, he looks at it and he says, it'd be a good place to hide a body. He's like, no one would ever find him here. And they're like, what? What'd you just say? And then he just laughs at the camera. And then he just puts back out of the mouth. So they are like, okay, that's strange. That was a strange interaction. And they take him back. They end up... They're a good place to hide a body. Okay, I think we're done. So I was right when I was like, I killed that guy. Okay. So they film all this stuff in Colorado, it's 2014, and they meet with a bunch of just local restaurants because he remembers restaurants. And he actually knows like a lot about like details of working in a commercial kitchen where it's like, oh, you know enough where you've probably worked with some of these things before. You know, like you can tell some details. And let me see here. Here's the deal about the Evangelistas. Like these are serious filmmakers. And so they're not just talking to Benjamin. Right. They go and they track down the Burger King employee who found him. And they tell us your story and they film her. And she tells the whole story. And what's interesting about her story is she says, yeah, I got to work. And I found him lying behind the garbage can naked. And so I called the, I called 911 and they came and they picked him up. It was kind of that. Like it was kind of an interesting way to start the day. But I was it. And she's like, oh, that's interesting. She said, all the reports we hear is like he's beaten and bloodied and like covered in sunburn and covered in fire ant bites. And she lasts. She's like, yeah, none of that's true. Like he was just naked behind the dumpster. And they're like, oh, that's interesting. Okay. So then they contact the hospital. Hospital carb writes that. And they're like, yeah, it was just a naked man. There was nothing in a system. We checked a system. Make sure he wasn't like under the influence of anything. There was nothing in the system. Yeah. Like he was talking to us and like he couldn't remember his name or anything like that. But the notes from the doctor. So they believe he's malingering, which malingering is a medical tool to a medical term for lying. Right. They're like, we don't think he doesn't remember anything. We think he's just pretending not to remember. Pretending not to remember. For sure. Okay. And so they confront him about this. And he. They go, hey, the doctors say this. And he goes. I don't. Remember. I don't remember. Dock. What's a doctor? Moline. We're going to have the doctor. We're going to have to tell him what a doctor is. He's like, he's like, you. Tell me right now. He has to tell me what a doctor is. What's a doctor? What's a doctor? And so they're filming this. Okay. They're traveling, meeting all these different people in the middle of their travels to meet the people who are allegedly a part of this first pick up. The news comes out that he has had so many people reach out to him to try to help him. Yeah. And one of the people who tried to help him was a genealogist who was like, let's get some DNA. Let's figure this out. And we can track it down. And she was another one who she got really close and he cut her off and just stopped talking to her. Yeah. And so she connects with another famous genealogist. And they end up tracking down that his birth name, they tracked down his whole family. His whole family tree, his birth name and everything. And they realize his name is actually. His will is. His birth name is William Burgess Powell, so this is William Burgess Powell. And they find this out. And they're like the documentarians are like, oh, we know who he is now. Now we have like a lot more to go off of. Sure. They know he was born in Indiana. They know he's got. Wait, how did they put that together? Genetics. And so they did. They got a DNA sample. They got a DNA sample. They did DNA tests. They tracked down William Burgess Powell. William Burgess Powell. And so this comes to this hits the news. And this is like hitting nationwide news because he was the doctor feel like nobody knows who this guy is guy. And so everyone's talking about we know who this guy is. Yeah. And the charity in in Florida called ID, ID, something they work with him to get his first ID. And he got a picture when he finally got an ID and was able to be William Burgess Powell. A legally alive human again, which is a big deal because he talks about in the documentary. He's like, it's a terrible loop because if you don't have a social security number, you can't get a job. If you can't prove an income, you can't get a place to live. If you can't get a place to live, you don't have a mailing address. You can't get an ID. If you can't get an ID, you can't get a social security number. And he's like, so you're just kind of stuck in this loop where it's like, yeah, you have no way to solve the problem. Like it's impossible. And so finally, figuring out this name, working with us other organization to get an ID was a huge moment for him and a pretty big deal. Hey, October 22nd, we're doing Tillon Live as part of the Fountain City Comedy Festival here in Kansas City. You got a Tillon.com slash live for more information. You get passes. There's going to be more than just us. Oh, yeah. It's like legitimately not an advertisement right now. The festival's pretty sick. Like, there's a really great lineup, a lot of really good comics. This thing's been growing a lot the past couple of years, so really cool to be the part of it. And so hopefully we'll see you there. And so they were the documentarians were there with him for that moment. And it was a beautiful thing, you know, like it's kind of like, oh, this guy who couldn't remember his life is getting his life back together. I mean, spent 10 years now homeless, just because he doesn't know who he is, really what the problem is. And so, but they now have a pretty big thing to commit to if you're lying. Yeah. Yeah. If you're lying, it's pretty crazy to be like, I'm going to be homeless for 10 years. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Unless you killed someone. Coming up next, this man says that he's been homeless for 10 years, but our team might have another idea. So they track down his family in Lafayette, Indiana, which is with the town he wrote he's from. Yeah. And the documentarians, they just go and they leave, they don't go with him, they go on their own and they just go around town and they're like, hey, do you know William Powell? And it's a small town, everybody does. And everybody's like, yeah, I remember that guy. And a lot of the town is like, I'm not going to talk to you about that guy. Yeah. And a lot of the town is like, you should stop asking about that guy. You don't want to be involved with that guy. Okay. So they end up tracking down a couple of people who are willing to talk about him. And they piece together this story about his life. He was born in 48, I was correct, but his dad had anger issues. His dad was horribly abusive. And they do end up talking to one of his brothers and they find out like, this is like extreme abuse to the point where he like, he stabbed his brothers, he shot one of the kids in the leg like insane level of abuse. And so at 14, he runs away from home, William Powell, and we actually have a picture of him, like a school picture of him from when he was a kid, which definitely is the same guy. Yeah. But his nose is smaller though, his nose is smaller there. There's a point in the documentary where they do bring him back to Lafayette and he sees this and he's like, he's like, yeah, we all had those flat haircuts back then. And I remember we all had the flat top. That was so cool. And he made a big deal about the flat top. We all had the flat top. Um, we all had the flat top. He does talk like that. Does he talk like that? He does talk like that. Did I nail it immediately? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, we all had the, we all had the flat tops. And you see this hill down here to be a problem. You get a higher body down there. You get a higher body down there. You get a higher body down there. He sounds like a paltry of money. Well, you can hide a body down there. And so we're getting a left here for Christmas. They piece together this story from people in the town that he ran away from home at 14. You got a lot to get to. You're pushing through. You ran away from home at 14. Run out of time. Lair's pulling her gun out. This is what happens if we push over an hour, Blair pulls a gun on Tim. Hurry up and says, hey, you're taking too long. You're taking too long. Faster. She sounds like that, too. You're taking too long. Blair, she doesn't sound like that. She doesn't talk. So William runs away from home, starts working a lot of jobs throughout Lafayette. Yeah. Not to be confused with the hats. What? Other people will get it. It went over here. Oh, no. Okay. Okay. No, he's just went over there. Yeah. This guy has too small a kid. He can't lock on to my head. He's too big. He's going. He's working different jobs. He works on a job. He gets a job. He gets a job at the movie theater, works the movie theater for a little bit, gives restaurant jobs. When is this? This is grown up. He's after he's run away from home at 14. Yeah. In mid 60s, early 70s. Yeah. This is the timeline. And he's not grown up. He's 16. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. He's run away from home. And so. He's the advocate for a strip club in Laffa, and he needs him. Yeah. I didn't think about that. I didn't think about, you're starting a company company. Did I reach out to London? It's an adapt market. Yeah. It's honestly pretty easy to hire cleaners. That's great. We do have a cleaning company. I'm not going to tell you anything more about it. He ran away from home and like he's living homeless because he's like that situation was so bad. I'd rather live in the streets since he's trying to find a place to live. It ends up in 1973. He finds someone who lets him move into a mobile home on their property. So they have just a trailer outside their house. And the documentary's putting all this together apart from him. Yeah, they pieced all this storyline together apart from him. Okay. And what's interesting is in 1976, there's something that basically the whole town remembers this event, but they won't tell the documentarians why. They said in 1976, Powell was out late with his friends. And then they, they at about one o'clock left the bar and then they drove his red station wagon into the woods, removed the license plate, ditched it and they left for Colorado. And they never came back and that's the last time anybody saw them. And people from the town, I should say the majority of people from the town do not have any idea why this happened. They're like it was a really weird thing. Nobody knows why they found the station wagon. Yeah, and they said they filed the missing persons report. And like this, it was a whole search. People were trying to find them. Nobody found them and everybody just assumed they died. Okay. There are some people in the town that like when pressed on it are like, I'm not gonna go into that. Like I'm not gonna talk about that. And so like something interesting is going on here. Meanwhile, they're like, hey, we found your family. You want to come back to Lafayette, like get a place to live, meet your brother wants to meet you. And cause it's been 30 years now, 40 years since his brother. And so he meets his brother. This is his brother. Vern, Vern. Hold on, he's got a weird name. Surprise when he went on Dr. Phil, he wasn't like, this guy kind of looks like Dr. Phil. Also loved that his flip phones out. Also, look at Stachi Wyendom. All's also. Yeah, okay. His name is Fernum. Ferman, Ferman Powell. Ferman? Ferman Powell, Jr. Sure. And so they go back to their grandmother's house, which is the house that they grew up in and they do a reunion. And they got this whole thing in the documentary. Okay. And it's like, it's honestly kind of a beautiful moment of like two brothers who haven't seen each other in decades. Shoot each other in a way. Like reuniting. And like you can tell, like Benjamin or William, whatever his name is. You can tell he remembers his brother. But you can tell he's trying to act like he doesn't remember his brother. And so he's like, he's like, what's your name? And like you can see on his face that he's like, oh my God, it's my brother. But like he's acting like he doesn't recognize him and then they're trying to catch up and all this stuff. So he's not as good an actor as I am. Correct. Cause watch best friend. No, this guy for a little watch out quick. I mean, like who are you? Do I know you? What's your name? I'm sorry. I'm Bruce Willis. You are Bruce Willis. Yeah, it's in the eyes. I don't know if you can see Robert, can you? Robert, pay attention. Robert, pay attention when you're in the game. You zoom in my eyes. You can see the little bit of like a, like a little bit. Okay, I'll do it a little closer here. I'll cheat out. I go, that's a term cheating out. Cheating out. Yeah, cheat out is a subtle, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm very good. I'm like a good actor. Put that in my real. Speaking of Bruce Willis, I don't tell you how, remember what I shaved my head and call it? Cut this crap out. So we got a lot to get you. Players loading are gone. The player's freaking. Players got a good. Players got a gun. So Furman and Taylor's gonna come on. No, I remember, speaking of Bruce Willis, remember when I shaved my head bald? Yeah. Did I ever tell you that I was genuinely, and this is not a joke. You thought that it was like a, yeah. That I looked like, not Bruce Willis, but Vin Diesel, you're like, I look good like this. I clearly remember putting on one of those, those white, two, those white muscle shirts and standing in front of my mirror and being like, I do look like Vin Diesel. And then I went to the gym at Avangel, which I never did, and I started doing girls with the thing. I started doing girls. I was like, I do look like Vin Diesel. I'm like, oh yeah, that is like Vin Diesel. I am Vin Diesel. And then I left the gym that night and I walked home and I strutted more than I ever strutted across that corner. And I'm like, I'm Vin Diesel, baby. Yeah. And then someone was like, what's up, loser? And I was like, oh. And someone said, hey, Tim. And you're like, that is my name. That is my name, I'm not Vin Diesel. So he's at the family reunion clearly trying to pretend, not a good actor. Yeah, and then they say, hey, you guys want to have a moment? Like you guys can go inside, we'll leave, we'll go back out to the car. Like, what do you think we're going to kiss? We're brothers. My brother's really nice. You guys want to have like a moment? No. There is actually, he does. The brother is like, hey, I found this. Our mom kept this, because he's like, our mom, she's like, she grieved you till the day she died when you just disappeared. She'd never stopped grieving your loss. And she's like, she kept all your things. And she's like, this is your Pinewood Derby Car that you and dad made. And he grabs that Pinewood Derby Car. And you can see like tears well up in his eyes, like from the memories. Yeah. And so it's like, he know. Like, you know he knows from watching that. Right. But they're like, hey, we'll let you guys have a moment. You can show them around the house, see if he remembers anything. Like we're going to turn the cameras off where you're good. And so they go inside. He still has a microphone. Yeah, they're, they're, they're Mike. Yeah. And they don't realize it. So they go in and, oh my gosh. And William is talking to his brother, for a minute. And William is like, yeah, I would have loved to see Robert, but Robert wants nothing to do with me. And Furman is like, yeah, well, he's like, he's like, you have a lot to a tone for. And like, and it's kind of strange that he says this, but he's like, he's like, and you know, Navajo communities, like you have to go do a cleansing before, like you can be considered clean for the things that you've done. And he says, because, because William, killing people is a big deal. And that's where they end an episode. I guarantee you that the set of events, like killing people with a big deal credits. I just know, and that's where we're ending this one too. If you want the rest of this, join us on Patreon. Give us money. I tried Blair. Hey, killing people is a big deal. It's a big deal. Relax. And so they are like, hold on, what? And so they go back to a lot of these people who had some serious questions about them. And from doing this, they are able to kind of piece together this story where he, along with a couple other guys, a guy by the name of Chico Gates. Okay. And a guy by the name of, let me get this guy's name, George Keck. They were all associates with each other in town. Yeah. And without going into too much detail, what they begin to discover is there was a crime family that oversaw Lafayette that was connected to Chicago, the Chicago mob. Okay. And these three were the muscle. And they were the ones who would go out and kill the people who got in the mob's way. And it's very interesting because in the documentary, there's a scene where they tell William. They're like, hey, William, they get him a place in Lafayette so he can get back on his feet. He's got a house there. And they call him meeting in Lafayette. They're like, hey, we track someone down that. Things they remember, some other stuff from your past. You want to meet him and he's like, absolutely. I would love to meet someone who can help me piece together the past that I don't remember. And Chico walks in the room and William will not look at him. Like, he will not, and Chico stands over him like a bear. And he's like just locked eyes on him and like puffed up and just like ominously over him like, look what you did, like kind of attitude. It's like, you messed up. Okay. And William is like a scared dog. It is one of the strangest things to see like in this documentary. Yeah, in this documentary. And they leave the room. They do the same thing. They leave the room, leave a, leave the mics on. Well, they were smart enough. They were like, hey, can you take the mics but they had planted hidden cameras? Of course. So they didn't know that. And they, what the documentarians are like, you can tell in this conversation that they suspect that there's hidden cameras in here. And they are talking to each other as if Chico is trying to alert him of what they know. And so he is telling him, yeah, we talked about, he's like, he's like, I don't remember everything but like they were talking about how like we ditched your car and like we took off the plates or something. Like do you remember that? And he's like, he's like, they're trying to get their story straight. And he's like, but he's trying to do it in a way. Yeah. That isn't it like, okay, here's what we're gonna do. It's like, it's like we're trying to play this off. Yeah. And so they align their stories. And then they do the same thing with another guy at the Thomas Keck. Thomas Keck significantly older. And the way they play Thomas Keck is actually really interesting. Okay. Because Thomas Keck again, a significantly older man and what they do is he agrees to meet with Eric and they have a meeting they talk and he's not really playing ball. But on that talk, Eric is like here, my wife has some questions. Let me pull her up and see if you can talk to her and he pulls her up on the phone so she can talk to him and he's a little bit more open to talking to her on the phone. Now, and so she comes and she's trying to be really friendly and she talks to him like she is like gossiping with him. And so she's like, yeah, so she's like, and so what do you remember from that night? And she's like, and that's kind of crazy because they were telling me this and he just kind of like starts opening up to her. But here's the thing they know about Thomas. Thomas was also a serial abuser. Thomas almost got put away for the murder of a girl by the name of Christine Kozik in 1977. And the only reason he didn't is because the whole storyline that he that incriminated him came from his wife who was the witness in the whole story. And she ended up not testifying. And so he didn't go away for murder for that because that was the only evidence they had. He threatened his wife. Yeah, and he terribly abused her. Terribly terribly abused her. And so obviously Shannon talking to him is very nervous talking to this man. She knows he's a dangerous man. Even though like in this, he just looks like a harmless old man. Yeah. And so she talks to him and gets him to spill a lot more of the story but it's still not enough for them to like conclusively tie things. And so what they want to do is they want to get his DNA to see if they can tie him back to these cold cases. Sure. And so they take him to a Mongolian grill and they said, we thought this would be perfect because it was a buffet style and they were like, we could just wait for him. We'll grab an extra fork, we'll grab an extra straw at the beginning of the meal and wait for him to go up for seconds and take his fork in his straw and just replace them with the new ones. And then we have his DNA and we can go get that tested. Okay. Very clever. And so they do that. They ask for when he stands up, he takes his fork in his straw because he knows this. And he goes, you think this is my first time around there? He's like, I will cut you. I know a good place to hide a body. And what's interesting is they verify. Is he gets up for seconds? They get the stuff, they're having the meal. But he never trust anyone who takes you to a Mongolian barbecue. He is hot. Telling them everything, like in detail, everything that ever happened. And here's the thing. They're talking about murders. Dude, all you have to do is, all you have to do is give a guy some spicy beef. You know what I'm talking about? And then he's like, yeah, I killed that girl. They're talking about murders. And so somebody else in the Mongolian girl calls the police and they're like, hey, the table next to us is like graphically describing the murders he did. And so the police show up and they get kicked out like cause they were like, I don't understand how the guy didn't get arrested, honestly. He was just emitting them a bunch of murders. Yeah. So they go to Penaera. And he doesn't get a Penaera. They get more samples from him to Penaera, which is crazy. OK. And then what's really interesting, they're talking to Chico, they're talking to Keck, they're talking to William, talking to all these other people, they end up finding part of this crime family. And the documentary is really interesting because once they get closer to this crime family, the people that they talk to are very scared to be talking about. Yeah. And so they are all like, I won't show my face. You have to blur everything. You have to disguise my voice. There are things I'm not going to tell you about. There's even one person at one point in the documentary who calls them and says, I'm leaving. I don't exist anymore. I'm taking my money. I'm skipping town. I don't exist to you. And so they're clearly starting to ruffle some feathers of some people. And they end up getting this call from someone in the crime family who tells them everything. And it's like, yeah, they killed somebody. What happened was this person got in in the way of this crime syndicate. And they said, OK, we're going to have to have you, Chico, specifically Chico and William, you're going to take care of them. Yeah. And you're going to go to Colorado and you are dead. You disappeared. And they were like, we are going to bankroll the rest of your life. And they're like, we're just going to make sure you, because you're not going to be able to ever work again. Yeah. And you're just going to live off the grid and Colorado for the rest of your life and we're just going to send you money. And so that is what happened. He moved to Colorado. They wired him money for 30 years until the boss of this crime family died. And the kids took over. And the kids are like, we're not going to pay this guy anymore. Get it going. We're not going to pay this guy. And so they stopped paying him. And all of a sudden, he is off the grid. Has it worked for 30 years? Doesn't have a social security number. Yeah. Because even if you look at a social security record, he's still like, there's only one thing to do. I mean, like, OK. And so he concludes that the only option for him is for him to look like a crazy person who got attacked and forgot everything. And then they start to restore his life. That's what he assumed would happen. But the system in the United States doesn't care about you. And he's like, oh, it's kind of sucks. I'm just homeless now. Yeah. And so he thought that that would be his opportunity to kind of restore his life, have been able to make an income again. But it wasn't. And it took a decade of being in the limelight, which was obviously not what he wanted. But at the same time, kind of smart for him. Because he knew if this crime family knows he knows, he's dead. Right. And so he's like, he's like, OK, I can be in the public eye. I can come back into real life. I don't remember anything. I don't remember any of it. And so he comes back and he goes to the nines being in the public eye, but not remembering anything while they are all looking. And nobody finds anything until they all did. Here's the crazy thing about this. This documentary team, they started filming this in 2014. This documentary released in May, 2026. And so they have been following the story, trying to piece this together for over a decade. And they just released it. And when they released it, they said, no convictions have been made in any of these cases. They also said, because it's all come together so recently, they also said, William has cut them off. William, and they went back to his house to be like, hey, what's going on? His house is empty, like he's not there. And so he's disappeared again. And no one knows where he is. And so he is on the run now. He's either on the run or they got him, which is crazy. And so I am pretty sure over the next few years, like this story is going to come back up because someone's going to figure out what actually happened in this second disappearance. But right now, right now, he's B.K. Cooper. Yeah, exactly. Running straight up the mom again. D.B. Cooper. You're right. That's actually a crazy story. I can't believe we've never done it. OK. But yeah, that's a, that's this guy. Wow. You know, what they say. But you know what I like about this photo is you can immediately tell he's a mob enforcer. You know what I'm talking about? Just pull up the other one. Pull up the one that you know. This guy and no. This guy enforces for the mob. It is crazy to see. It's just crazy to see because you see these guys when they're old and like these guys just seem like just normal old guys. You know, but it's like, but when he was young, this was this guy. And when this guy was young, this was this guy. Also, it doesn't really seem like an enforcer, but it does seem like a creep. Yeah, yeah, he does, but what's crazy is that moment where he said, and this is where you hide a body, what the documentarians were like, we actually tracked down. There was a John Doe body that was founded in that ravine in the 80s. And they were like, nobody I'd ever saw of that case. And they're like, we think he admitted to a murder there was what he was doing, which is wild. At that point, he's just playing with his food. You know, he's just kind of like, yeah. And that's where you hide a body. If, I mean, crazy, right? Crazy. Yeah. And in Catherine, I forgot about this whole part with Catherine. When he was with Catherine, he abruptly left Catherine because Catherine was getting close. And so he abruptly moved. And when he moved, he got really aggressive with her. And he's like, he's like, I'm leaving. And he took a, she's like, he took a bunch of paper from his room. And he went into the backyard and he burned it all, like a ton of paper and burned it all in the backyard. And I was fighting him. I was telling him not to, like, this is my yard. You can't burn this here. And she's like, I was spraying a circle of water around it. So when it's spread, and she's like, it was this whole scene. And then she's like, he went inside and he did something to the computer. And then he left. And then I never saw him again. And so the documentarians were like, do you still have that computer? And she was like, yeah, and they brought it to a forensic data scientist to go back and see what they could find. And they found backups on the machine from the time when he was living there. They said he had a tour browser, which is the browser you used to access the dark web. And they said that his safari. And they said that his traffic, he had a forensic wiping system so you could back it, like, delete the data of the things that you were doing. But they said that some of it survived. And they said that the things he was looking for on there was assassin-type stuff. And so it was like the stuff where you know, assassins for hire. And he was trying to get jobs. Yeah, and then there was also, I can't remember exactly what this said, but this is so crazy. It was like, there was like a search on there for something along the lines of like, and this is going to sound crazy. But it was like, ritual dances for Satan. Dead serious, I'm not making that up. This is not a bit. I'm not doing like a bit of a lot of bit. Oh, I thought that was serious ritual dances for Satan, which I think was him trying to like plant things of like, oh, he's crazy. But he also might have been crazy. Because what's the music for those ritual dances? It's a fiddle off. Hey, thanks for listening to this episode of Things Are The Last Night. If you liked it and you want another one, like it, the Lake City Quiet Pills are also an interesting old man doing something sketchy online kind of thing. So check that one out. Also, next week's episode is available right now. And we have a discord with a bunch of Tillin fans who get to know each other and hang out. And we have Monthly Hangouts. When does this book come out? Who knows? Who knows? So at some point, there will be a Monthly Hangout. We'd love to see you there. And we'll see you there. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.


Imagine waking up in a hospital bed with no memory of who you are. No name. No social security number. No idea how you ended up naked and unconscious behind a Burger King dumpster. That’s not the opening scene of a thriller — that’s the actual, documented start of one of the strangest identity mysteries of the 21st century. And … Read More